ADVERTISEMENT

Raising mentally resilient kids makes them better prepared to tackle problems on their own. In fact, studies have found that they're more likely to be engaged in school and in their future jobs.

However, parenting is hard work and sometimes even good intentions don't guarantee the best outcomes. Not to mention moms and dads who may have found themselves unprepared for the job.

Earlier this month, Reddit user J---L submitted a question to the platform's community 'Entitled Parents', asking, "What’s something completely insane your parents did that you only understood how messed up it is when you became older?"

Turns out, there's no shortage of such examples. J---L has received hundreds of replies, many of which detail tough personal experiences. Continue scrolling to check out some of the most upvoted ones and don't miss the conversation we had with writer, director, broadcaster, and founder of the parenting blog Honest Mum, Vicki Broadbent.

#1

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids My parents used to strip us naked and lock us out of the house from Friday to Monday morning as punishment. I was in 2nd grade when this started.

They would flip over chairs and have us lay over the backs, and tie our arms and legs to the chairs and beat us with the buckle end of the belt until blood splattered the walls, "so we would bleed for our sins."

They used to turn the stove on and wait until the burner was red hot and hold our hands JUST above the burners while we sobbed uncontrollably. This only stopped once I passed out a few times and had burns so bad they required ER visits. The Docs asking questions made them stop that.

At age 6 my mom caught her boss touching me and from that point on would SCREAM at me on a daily basis about being a s**t and asking how many d***s did I suck? Regularly. Until I moved out at 14.

Slamming our heads into walls and when we fell, kick us in the head, back, face, ribs until their legs got tired and they would tap out with each other.

When my parents found out my brother used to sexually assault my sister and I from age 7-13 they blamed me for it and cut me out of the family entirely. Despite my brother admitting to it and confessing he sold me to his friends as early as 3rd grade. I still have those texts and read them anytime I miss having a "family" to remind myself they never were that to me. I'm better off alone.

HappeeWrite , Mārtiņš Zemlickis Report

Add photo comments
POST
tomchbrown avatar
Tom Brown
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I suspect you have an inner strength most of us can only dream of, no one should have to endure any of that

teresathomas avatar
Teresa Thomas
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Its not strength. It was literal survival. The trauma likely induced on their psyche is horrific

Load More Replies...
alexandradavis avatar
Alexandra Davis
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Reading the comments on Reddit the OP now has her own family and has cut all ties with her family. Her sister was murdered when she was 15 and her older brother in is jail. She helped het younger brother escape and paid for his schooling until it came out that her older brother SA her and her younger brother took his mums side and moved back to het. OP is one strong woman to have come through this and out the other side.

beab_ avatar
Ample Aardvark
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's horrific, the parents should have gone to prison as well, but I'm glad she has a decent life now

Load More Replies...
misstiwari92 avatar
BetterBitterButter
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Reading this made me feel like hell and I can't imagine actually experiencing these. Not every parent deserves a child. Hope OP is doing better now. They deserve to be punished and has no right being called a "family"!

miriaml avatar
Miriam L
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This isn't "wierd things families do." This is abuse of a particularly horrifying and disgusting kind. I know many of the examples here are going to cross the line into emotional abuse and mental distress because when the weirdness, double standards, and unreasonable expectations come from your primary caregivers, it hurts. It messes you up. But this isn't one weird expectation. This is just pure horror. I'm glad OP is out and safe. I'm ticked off that BP would put this in a post without some kind of warning.

johnteeple avatar
kansasmagic
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My first thought too - this isn't "weird," it's straight up child abuse.

Load More Replies...
rhondamoore avatar
Mrs Irish Mom
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow i had to read it twice because thats probley the most sick story of child abuse i have ever heard about in my whole life, im shocked that school, neighbours didnt report anything

sarahschmidt436 avatar
Black Cat
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is horrendous. Make your own family up from friends who love and care about you. Your family of origin are pure poison based on what you've said, you're so much better off going no contact with them, they deserve each other.

filipamenezes avatar
Filipa Menezes
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This article should be called "People recall the abuse they endured as children". This is not a family quirk as the title implies

eileenkeller94 avatar
Metalhead Turtle 🇺🇦
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah. This is at number one and I don't want to read any more. According to an earlier comment, OP has cut off all family ties. My heart aches for them.

Load More Replies...
chr-giorgaki avatar
Chriss21
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hope your parents and brother are rotting in jail. I hope you and your sister are well now

tamrastiffler avatar
Tamra
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And here's where I tap out. This will haunt me for weeks. I just can't.

cindycollins_1 avatar
Beachbum
Community Member
8 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Dear God what in the f**k did I just read!! This is absolutely horrific!!

andrew_joseph_barrett avatar
birdhouse
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh how I want to believe this isn't real. As a father of 3 girls I just don't understand. These "parents" are the worst people ever.

elisabethbreckenridge avatar
LissyPoo
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not better off alone. Better off without them for sure - but I hope this peraons finds people who will be a loving group like fanily to them, to show them what love really it. This makes me want to vomit.

danmarshctr avatar
The Original Bruno
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OK, this isn't a "weird thing," this is one of the most horrific cases of abuse I've ever read. Please, BP: Watch how you market this! I was looking for, "herer's how wacky my parents were," not "here's the unending torture I received from psychopaths"

cebizz2007 avatar
Singing Panda
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh my God. This is awful. I hope you find some peace. You are so strong.

wordtrix avatar
Terri Rimmer
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm deeply sorry you went through that. I can't imagine. My dad sexually abused me from the time I was 3 to 17.

sparklystuffbyrae avatar
Lyoness
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is horrific. You did nothing to deserve any of it and none of it is your fault. I'm sure you know this but sometimes survivors need to hear it again, even if from a random stranger on the internet. And you have no responsibility to have a relationship with such sick individuals. I hope you've gotten some help to deal with this.

shangrilaaerie avatar
Maggie Mae
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes you are & were better Off without them!! Some Folks just have Children so They Have someone They Can Beat Up I am Convinced of That!!An Adult would kick Their Asses! My Birth Mother Used to Tell Everyone I was all A*S & POCKETS & TITS!! I Always wear Loose Joging Clothes & if I Need to Go Out I wear Baggy Attire still to This day & I am 67 Now & they are Both in Hell Long DEAD & shoving CAOL into the FIRES for All Infinity and Beyond!!

lhmcd1 avatar
Louisa Spoke
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It’s terrible what you went through. You are strong but not tough I be inclined to believe. I lived through something similar. You are not alone. You do matter. Choose friends instead of family as you can’t choose family. I am sorry that happened to you and please know that you didn’t do anything wrong. You were a good child and the were/are the problem. May you please take care and stay safe.

starhawkhunt avatar
A. Starhawk Hunt
Community Member
9 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Lord and Lady, you are amazing too have survived with enough courage to tell us this. I had, in some ways, a similar childhood with certain differences; I was not put out in the weather or beaten. I watched my brother beaten for something I had done and was to scared to admit, th he other side of my card is that, out of five immediate male family members 4 molested me. My youngest brother refused to be a part of it. When my father propositioned me when I was 35, I ended up in a mental ward, judged as suicidal. I gained courage enough from my male best friend (and, 20 years later, the love of my life) to put a stop to it when I was in my late teens…..and to help a friend stop her molestation.

sarawilson_2 avatar
Sara Wilson
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hope u find a true family if ur own making. Just because u share blood, doesn't mean u r "family"

robyn63ward avatar
Robyn Ward
Community Member
9 months ago

OMG.....no words in a dictionary to use for these ..............

locogriffyn avatar
Griffy
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I find it sarcastically funny that her mother was a "respected church lady". Not all Christians are bad, but it's the nuts that abuse "in the name of the Lord" that should be shot. My opinion only.

zselyke_szekely avatar
UpupaEpops
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I know it's asking a lot after enduring hell on earth, but I have to wonder if she managed to save her sister? I'm thinking about my baby sister and I know I'd go John Wick on anyone who hurt her.

butternutsquash avatar
Lydsylou
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

On the internet it says that her sister sadly was murdered at age 15. Idk who killed her

Load More Replies...
dianalmay8 avatar
Diana May
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wish I had been your mom. I am so sorry that this was your childhood. I wish you all the love in the world, which is what you deserve

misstabitha1975 avatar
Tabitha Osika
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ummm this is not weird things your parents did. This is horrific and you never deserved any of that. I am so sorry and send you all love and good vibes.

debrarobinson_4 avatar
Debrina Blackmoon
Community Member
9 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Holy fukcin shyt!!! How vile!!! Monster psycho assholls!!!

lmmldriver avatar
Anxious&Bored Bear
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm so glad you cut those toxic sh*ts out of your life, and I hope you are doing better.

sheriesmith avatar
Skulls.N.Succulents
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can't fathom how this didn't end in... "My parents and brother are dead and I served 25 of my 25-Life sentence. Got off for good behavior."

barb_forshee avatar
Barbara Forshee
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am sooooo sorry you had to live through all that. None of that was your fault. You deserved better than that and I hope you have gotten some counseling to help you deal with this abuse. I am soooo sorry.

deadpool_3 avatar
Dead Pool
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can't even imagine the pain. Hope you heal from all that.

jules_11 avatar
Jules
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Utterly tragic beyond words. There are some people in this world who should not have kids. That this person went on have a better life is a testament to their will to survive and so glad they've been able to put that behind them.

debs_bee avatar
Debs Bee
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Your story is haunting. That you are here to tell tour story speaks to your fortitude. I sincerely hope your life today is peaceful and free from pain.

abigailplace avatar
Hex Gurls
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

oh my f*****g god i’m so sorry and if there is a hell i know exactly where your family is going. i hope they all get a devastating wasting disease that is a long slow painful death.

soaringbluenightingale avatar
ThatBlackNightingale
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm so sorry for all the abuse and trauma you had to go through, that's plain up abuse, what horrible parents they are! I hope you find healing and strength, you are so strong, and know to never let them back into your circle again.

jbunting242 avatar
RabidChild
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hope the universe rains down light and luck on this child that's already been thru more hell.than any person should ever have to endure.And for these evil pus bags I wish nothing less than a Brothers Grimm kind of justice.

kenyatate avatar
JelliTate
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh goodness the sadness I feel for you reading this. Your parents did not deserve to have children and you deserved way better from this cruel world. I hope you have found peace in your life.

draganacupurdija avatar
PeePeePooPoo
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh dear God. I admire you for having strenght to write this and live with this every day. I hope you're surronded with people who love you and cherish you. Sending you a giant panda hug.

deannawoods avatar
deanna woods
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is not "weird", this is sickening. Families are not supposed to act like this.

samplecolby_2 avatar
Haywood Jablome
Community Member
9 months ago

This comment has been deleted.

travisgoblinking avatar
snorkythepig avatar
Snorky The Pig
Community Member
9 months ago

This comment has been deleted.

Load More Replies...
emmyandtom085 avatar
Timbob
Community Member
9 months ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

And I suspect, you’re , FULL OF S**T !

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
#2

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids My parents are Mexican immigrants but my dad became a us citizen along the way anyways. They raised me to cook and clean a was the middle child of two brothers. They always hated when I would focus on school work outside of school and would scream at me to stop. They said women are only good for cooking and cleaning. Currently I’m in school for my masters I’m working as a RN. My two brothers are working customer service jobs and both decided not to go to college after high school.

Snausage-Time , Joshua Hoehne Report

Add photo comments
POST
misstiwari92 avatar
BetterBitterButter
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Looks like the one only good for "cooking and cleaning" is cooking her own recipe of life while cleaning her obstacles.

View more commentsArrow down menu

"We are all flawed humans and parents, with most of us committed to improving on what we ourselves experienced at the hands of our own parents," Vicki Broadbent, the woman behind Honest Mum and the author of Mumboss: The Honest Mum’s Guide to Surviving and Thriving at Work and at Home, told Bored Panda.

"Every generation hopes to evolve for the better. It must be noted, however, that we are the first generation of parents as Gen X and Millennials who have embraced therapy without stigma, yielding positive results on our families, and hopefully our kids' kids."

#3

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids My mom found Christianity and made us all find it. Secular (non religious) cds got thrown away, we had to have angel television (only religious shows), we were forced to go to church/youth group/and church camp. Reading material was the Bible. We had no choice in the matter and were forced to be religious. If we questioned anything we were going to hell and grounded. Shocking that both my sister and I have zero to do with Christianity. Do not force your beliefs on your children. You can guide them but let them make their own choices. My daughters know I don't buy into any of that but I told them I will support whatever they believe as long as you don't use those beliefs to hate others.

Irondaddy_29 , Arina Krasnikova Report

Add photo comments
POST
bharrelson2002 avatar
Billy Harrelson
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is one that kept me from Christianity for so long. Turns out you can be Christian and listen to secular music (just be aware of what you're listening to), watch secular TV and even have things like tattoos and piercings (I have neither). You don't become perfect for being Christian. You're only trying to live as Christ did, but only he was 100% perfect. We as humans still fall short everyday but having the salvation that comes with knowing Christ died for our sins, that is what true Christianity is about.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
#4

I had bowel issues from age 2 years to about 8 years of age that required multiple surgeries. I physically couldnt poo due to my colon having issues.
My parents locked me in the toilet room from lunchtime until bedtime once (8.5hrs) to try and force me to do a poo. Of course I couldnt as my body would not allow me to.
They put soap up my bottom and would often bash me to try scare me into pooing. My mother overdosed me on my bowel medications, as she was sick of dealing with my issue.
They treated me as if I was purposely holding onto my poo just to be 'naughty'.
Looking back now and having my own kids, I realise how messed up their behaviour was. How could they do that to someone they are supposed to love and protect?

nicoleg58 Report

Add photo comments
POST
kenyatate avatar
JelliTate
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They didn't want to deal with it. Even though it wasn't happening to them! Azzholes.

View more commentsArrow down menu

Professional help can be really valuable to people who have gone through these things. "Therapy is a privilege, of course, and not accessible to all but where possible, my advice is to start therapy to heal generational trauma, your own childhood trauma, and thus understand who you are," Broadbent said.

But as she pointed out, many of us are lacking in self-worth and self-love. "It took me until 40 and after, years of therapy to deeply understand myself and feel good in my skin (and I'm a work in progress)," Broadbent revealed. "Parenting is triggering for everyone so understanding what your triggers are and how you can consistently parent positively is vital."

ADVERTISEMENT

"If you can't access therapy, speaking candidly to close friends in a safe space and way to work through those formative negative experiences can be useful. Harnessing self-awareness is the building block to accountability and transformation."

#5

My father was absent until I was 11. He returned and my siblings and I went from neglect to extreme abuse.


We weren't allowed to win anything that involved my father.

Didn't matter if it was a board game, trivia, or a video game. If you won, he would beat you to prove that, "he really won". He was shocked and angry that no one wanted to play with him after the first week.

I wasn't allowed to wear shorts in the house because, "men have urges" and I was "causing a reaction". I didn't realize until last year what that meant. I was 13, which makes my skin crawl.

Everything I did was viewed as sexual. His way of telling me goodbye was, "don't come home with a wet a*s" and that I didn't need to work because I was "sitting on a gold mine".

I'm in my late-30s now and I'm still scared that I'm only good for sex. I've been working on it for years in therapy but the shame lingers.

LDubs9876 Report

#6

My mother got an internship three hours away from where we lived when I was 11 and my sister was 13. My mom moved there temporarily for six months. So every Friday for six months, my dad would put us on a Greyhound bus and we would ride it alone for three hours and my mother would pick us up and then send us home the same way. My sister was in her "cool teenager" phase, so I got to sit with a lot of weird adults for six months who told me their life stories.

As a teacher now, I cannot fathom putting two children alone on a Greyhound bus one time, let alone for six months over and over again.

After my parents got divorced when I was 14, my mother got a promotion on the East coast (we lived in Arizona). She needed to go to three months of training in Virginia before her job actually started. So she left my sister and I alone for three months. And then she came back and we packed up and moved. She never called to check in, she never had friends stop by to check on us. It was up to me to get me and my older sister fed and to school every day.

Great mother. Haven't spoken to her in almost a decade. I hope she rots.

Blergsprokopc Report

Add photo comments
POST
milapreradovi avatar
Mila Preradović
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I won't go in other parts of the post that are messed up, but putting the kid on the bus and set them on their merry way was fairly common in the 80s and 90s Europe. I was 11.5 when I was put on the bus from Croatia to my uncle in Frankfurt, Germany (15+ hours ride) with a walkman and some sandwiches. My mum gave the bus driver 20 DM (Deutsch Marks) to keep an eye on me from time to time and that was it. We all travelled like that - to grandma/grandpas in the country, or at the seaside, or to another country. 🤷‍♀️Nothing traumatic about that.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT

However, the good news is that many moms and dads care about their children's emotional well-being. According to a new Pew Research Center survey, about four-in-ten U.S. parents with kids younger than 18 say they are extremely or very worried that their little ones might struggle with anxiety or depression at some point.

In fact, mental health concerns top the list of parental worries (followed by 35% who are similarly concerned about their children being bullied).

Although it's worth mentioning that quite a few parents probably would have at least some criticism for their own folks, as 44% claim they are trying to raise their children differently from how they were raised.

#7

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids I was never an acceptable weight. If I was 115 pounds, I looked anorexic. If I gained five pounds, I was told my "a*s looked six axe handles wide." Consequently, I am still unable to tell what I actually look like.

I was also accused of "sleeping with half the Western hemisphere"...before I had even received my first kiss.

MerelyWhelmed1 , i yunmai Report

#8

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids Mine were champions of mixed messages. To the point I still doubt my first instincts, or initial decision, At 47 years old!

They would complain I wasn't dressing nice enough, for school or other events,, then refuse to let me wear a silk shirt out, as if it was something reserved for the queen. I have snuck out a nice blouse on several occasions.

Dad would tell me there must be something wrong with me because I wasn't "going out" like other teenagers. Then tell me by going out somewhere when I don't know everyone, I'm going to get myself raped.

That's just 2 examples

So I second guess *everything *.... still

Eureka05 , Laura Chouette Report

Add photo comments
POST
sarahschmidt436 avatar
Black Cat
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Damned if you do, damned if you don't. My mother was similar, she'd tell me to be friendly and then when I initiated conversation with someone tell me I was being bold.

View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

"Putting the hard work in evolving, be it therapy or understanding how to manage your own emotions and stress levels, is critical as a parent," Broadbent added. "You can then model that behavior to your own children. Prioritizing self-care where possible (I know it's not easy) will make you a more compassionate parent. Exercise, eating well and healthily, and taking up yoga/ mindfulness will make the world of difference."

Luckily, when KidsHealth.org and TIME for Kids asked more than 9,000 children ages 8 to 14 about their family relationships, 85% said they have fun with their parents and 79% said they feel close to their parents. 

#9

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids These are probably small things in comparison but the older I get, the more they upset me. They wouldn't pay for glasses for me even though I literally couldn't see the blackboard at school. My dad took me for an eye exam and when I was perusing frames afterwards, he came up to me and said "what are you doing? I never said I was buying you glasses" in this aggressive, angry tone. My dad wasn't usually like that and it still confuses me to do this day. Idk why he was angry at me over needing glasses (which I finally got at 23 when my state insurance actually covered them, which they do not any more and only did so for about a year). I wear glasses 24/7, I obviously needed them. They also would not pay for braces and now my teeth are screwed up. They never taught me how to drive but they did teach my 3 siblings. My dad is a software engineer, he has always made decent money. So it wasn't bc we couldn't afford it.

WifeofBath1984 , Bud Helisson Report

Add photo comments
POST
devilinabluedress_1 avatar
Betsy Ray
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Get DNA testing. Alan Cumming, the actor, was treated horribly by his father. His brother was not.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#10

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids My dad demanded my sister and I put our dogs outside in a lightning storm to pee with their invisible fence collars on. We didn't do it and they were in the house when he got home. The storm was even worse at this point.

In response, he put them outside himself, then locked me and my sister in the dogs' crates in the garage to "show us how the dogs felt" for a few hours.

I'm not losing any sleep about him being gone.

Condensed_Sarcasm , Ayla Verschueren Report

#11

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids I would stay up until 3am working for my parents business. When I was 13. And it was a smoking establishment.

I would deliver food to sketchy parts of town by myself. As a 16 year old girl.

My mom started s**t shaming me at 12 for what seemed like everything.

This doesn't include the physical, emotional and sexual abuse. I didn't know why but I felt so ashamed even as a kid and I thought it was my fault.

Needless to say, we don't speak anymore.

Criticalfluffs , Manuel Will Report

#12

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids I would get accused of being pregnant at 16. I had heavy periods that would be every 32-35 days instead of 28. She would monitor my period and then accuse me of being pregnant if I didn’t have a period on day 29.

At one point I was anorexic and missed a period and she went mad insisting I was pregnant.

VixenRoss , Sora Shimazaki Report

#13

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids My mom giving me the silent treatment if I said something she disliked or did something that pissed her off. Half the time I didnt even know what Id done wrong!

As a mom now, I cant imagine ignoring my kid the way she did me or not outright correcting the issue.

dewihafta , Quino Al Report

Add photo comments
POST
sarahschmidt436 avatar
Black Cat
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mother gave me the silent treatment until her death. Don't miss her one bit. The silent treatment is just a silent tantrum and one of the hallmarks of a female narcissist.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#14

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids They would take my phone when I was a teen and text my friends pretending to be me to intentionally break up friendships. I’m talking 40 year old people texting 13-16 year olds saying they’re worthless and should give up or leave “me” alone. I used to just be mad and think it was a normal adult punishing me because it was their property. Now I look back and think of how much enjoyment they got bullying children and saying the most awful things.

ummmchef , Porapak Apichodilok Report

#15

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids Hearing my mom say to me and my older sister she can't wait for us to grow up and move out the house since I was 7yo. When I finally gained some independene and tried to move out with my bf, she kept nagging for me to delay the move or come visit frequently after I was no longer living in her house. Similarly, as a teen, I would often go visit friends across the country for several days at a time. Kept calling to ask where I was and when I'm coming back, guilt tripping me to not stay long because that was poor guest etiquette(??), even though I was invited. When I finally got back, she and my dad viciously asked when is the soonest I can go away again. Havent spoken to them in two years, best decision ever.

marble-polecat , Michal Balog Report

Add photo comments
POST
bharrelson2002 avatar
Billy Harrelson
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My sister-in-law did this to my nephew. From the time he was 10 she started counting down the days until he turned 18 and would have to leave and get his own place. Told everyone who would listen that the day after his 18th birthday he would be out on his rear and fending for himself. He's about to be 21 now and still living with her and helping with bills. My niece, on the other hand, was thrown out of the house at the age of 17 (she's 18 now) by the same sister-in-law. Was constantly shamed on her weight and how she dressed (any skin showing was simply WRONG). Her 13 year old sister, though, is praised for her weight and allowed to dress however she likes.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#16

I never received any recognition for the good things I did. Only greif when I messed up.

As a result, I (now 40) still have trouble recognising when people do or don't like me. I also have very little confidence in myself. I also struggle with motivation to do things.

Now, my problem is that even though I can see what the problem is, and where it came from, I don't know what to do with it. I have repeatedly asked the NHS for help, as going private (for therapy) isn't financially viable. As of now (4 years into asking for help), I have received 6 50 minute sessions, of therapy. Which, in my own words, is like showing up to an earthquake with a dust pan and brush.

H16HP01N7 Report

#17

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids Having to eat soap or hot sauce when one of us lied/said a bad word/backtalked. Didn’t matter who did it, I was punished too. And if one of my siblings broke a major rule, I MUST have also done it so would get grounded and lectured, but the sibling that did it would get a minor punishment.

Basically my parents confessed that they thought by showing my siblings that I could be punished, it would deter them from breaking more rules.

pizzasauce85 , Sincerely Media Report

#18

I'm nowhere near the level or even same universe as many here. My mom was just... inattentive. I realize now looking back that she was terribly depressed, so she would often sleep the day away while young me would putter around the house, watch TV, eat cereal for every meal until she'd finally get up just before my dad got home. She still jokes about the time I locked myself in the refrigerator as a toddler and she couldn't find me for almost an hour. By the time I was 12, we got Internet in our house (this was the late 90s) and I basically just set my own schedule, stayed up all night on chatrooms if I wanted. My room and the computer were on the opposite end of the house so nobody ever bothered me.

They were lucky that I was a "good" kid with crushing anxiety of my own that prevented me from taking advantage of their laissez-faire parenting style because I honestly can't remember my parents ever... parenting me. Never had hard rules, never had a curfew. I raised myself.

TrustyBobcat Report

Add photo comments
POST
ma_8 avatar
Girl Bear
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The fact you parents didn't physically harm you doesn't mean your hurt was less.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
See Also on Bored Panda
#19

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids I was obsessed with buttoning the top button on casual shirts. It felt safer to me to be buttoned up tight, probably because bodily autonomy was non-existent in my family. My mother HATED this habit. It got to the point where whenever she caught me with the top button closed, she would reach in with one finger, hook it behind the button and yank hard enough to pop the button off the shirt. It hurt like hell and usually caused bruises on the back of my neck along with a scratch from her fingernail in front. More than once she had to pull so hard, she backhanded me in the chin when the button finally popped off. She would always say, "That's one collar you can't button anymore".

Now, I can't stand to have anything around my neck.

Thanks mom, you saved me from walking around with my shirt collar closed.

Philosemen69 , Taisiia Shestopal Report

#20

Basically my dad locking me in the house and never letting me leave outside of taking me to school. And sleeping in the same bed as my dad until I was 14. He only let me have my own room when he remarried. And he made me shower with him too.

Krillins_Shiny_Head Report

#21

First few weeks of 1st grade in a new town, I met a fellow little girl on the school bus. We hit it off and somehow a playdate was arranged. I had younger siblings so my dad was the one to drop me off for the playdate at their little 1 story bungalow. My little friend's mom was single and she invited my dad in for coffee.

Next thing I knew, we looked up from playing Barbies on the floor and my dad and her mom were running back and forth from her bedroom to the only bathroom across the hall, taking turns wearing the mom's pink bathrobe.

When we left my dad told me not to tell my mom about anything that happened because if I did she would leave us and I'd never see my mom again. That's how the affair that broke up my parents marriage started, and eventually both my parents blamed me. "If you hadn't insisted on playing with that trashy little girl" etc.

Own_Instance_357 Report

#22

My male parent was horribly paranoid about everything. If I was allowed to spend time with a friend, he would obsessively call their house to make sure I was "really there". One time we left to a half block for some ice cream. He called when we were out, and that turned into a massive eruption. This particular behavior lasted until I moved out at 24yo.

If it were a movie, he'd find out exactly what time the movie started and ended, then camp out in a parking lot across from the theater to make sure we didn't leave the theater. And EVERYTHING was like this.

A scumbag who was mad that I wasn't interested in him convinced his mom to call my male parent and lie to him, saying I'd come by his house to have sex. That was the absolute worst thing I could possibly ever do in his eyes, even though he was an atheist. I had every avenue of communication with the outside world taken away, and was treated like I was the worst person in the world. My best friend at the time was good enough to call the b***h and convince her to call back saying she'd made a mistake. But since it was more fun or something to be hateful, he didn't believe her THAT time.

I pretty much wanted to be unalive for a far back as I can remember. I moved 1000 miles away, and despite my now ex being a jerk, I was much happier with his type of abuse. And once I was free of HIM, I've loved my life ever since, and am very happy. And still 1000 miles away from the crazy.

There's so much more of course. Being a child in a grocery store and being angrily yanked out of the way of someone because they happened to want to look at something where I was standing (even though I was just following HIM)? Made me pathologically terrified of being even mildly inconvenient to anyone, especially strangers. Just one little detail among many.

BotiaDario Report

#23

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids One summer, my mom took away all my toys because she said I wasn’t taking care of them by leaving them on the floor. She told me she threw them away. That year for Christmas, all I got was a garbage bag of my old toys. My sister got a new bike. I was I’m my thirties before I realized how messed up that was. She didn’t even wrap them!

Pikersmor , Nareeta Martin Report

Add photo comments
POST
zosephinebrueseke avatar
Mochi
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mum says that she'll throw it away if we leave it in the hallway, floor, etc. She just kept them until you forgot about them and you'd earn them back by doing extra chores. Usually my siblings would understand how much I wanted it back and the lengths I would go to get it back, and would have me do THEIR chores so that they didn't have to do anything. I'm sorry that you had to go through this.

View more commentsArrow down menu
#24

My mom threatened to kill me and herself by driving into oncoming traffic.... I was twelve.

Tractorhash Report

Add photo comments
POST
jules_11 avatar
Jules
Community Member
9 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Jesus Christ... No child whatever age should have to hear rhat

View more commentsArrow down menu
#25

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids Not having locks on doors I used.

Now when I go to their house I always lock the door when I use the bathroom or change. I’ve gotten into screaming matches with my mom about it.

Saxobeat28 , Dan Smedley Report

#26

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids Mother told me to always keep a blanket covering my bottom “in case someone is watching you while you sleep”. Also, when changing clothes, “remove panties last and put them on first”.

As I’m typing this, I wonder if it had to do with growing up with tons of siblings in the house. Seems pretty creepy to me, though.

Pluke1865 , Kristin Vogt Report

Add photo comments
POST
erin_16 avatar
GirlFriday
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I grew up with tons of siblings in the house (12 brothers), and was never told anything like this. We were told to always lock the door when we were changing and to knock and wait to be allowed in if any door in the house was closed.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#27

The difference between how my stepmom raised me, compared to how she is with my half sister. My sister can do no wrong. I have seen my sister get in my mom's face and scream at her, yet I couldn't even "backtalk". All I could say was yes ma'am or no ma'am, anything else and well... Let's just say my cheeks hurt. The huge 180 difference between how we were raised, still amazes me to this day

Shot_Ad5445 Report

#28

30 People Share Weird Family Things That They Didn't Realize Were Not Normal When They Were Kids I was repeatedly informed that they’re spending a lot of money on me and that other parents don’t do so. So I should feel obliged. It took me more than a decade to realise what she said was problematic, and I could not shake of the feeling of being indebted to her till the day she passed.

Royal_Anteater7882 , Jp Valery Report

Add photo comments
POST
catherineabc78 avatar
Lizz
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mom made me pay her car back ( which I accidentally totaled) "forgot" to tell me she had full insurance coverage....

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
See Also on Bored Panda
#29

My mom was a super clean freak growing up. To the point that i could never clean my room to her standards. Even if my dad help cleaned it. She would even start vacuuming in the middle of the night at times. She also would repose my action figures and models. Then yell at me if i complained or changed them bacl

azurezeronr Report

Add photo comments
POST
devilinabluedress_1 avatar
Betsy Ray
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Mom was consumed by guilt of some sort. Dad tried in this case..

View more commentsArrow down menu
#30

Making me comfort her when things were stressful instead of comforting me. I had to be her emotional support person as a child. A few times she'd get angry and call me 'mom' like it was an insult. And she was oddly competitive with me for no reason, I just wanted my mom to love me

terriblyrealgirl Report

Add photo comments
POST
kenbeattie avatar
Ken Beattie
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I get the "mom" one. That's normally in response to a kid saying "Mom" for the fiftieth time in an hour. Frustration is a thing and occasionally it creeps out in a response. The rest is pretty strange though.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

Note: this post originally had 39 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.