“No Name Is Safe”: 40 Of The Funniest Posts About Unconventional Baby Names, As Shared In This Dedicated Online Group
Parenthood is very rewarding and quite adventurous. Your life gets turned upside down, and you're doing things you never thought you would: early mornings, late nights, constant stress and pressure, yet a tiny smile from your little human is quick to fix any of your worries.
You spend a few exciting months preparing for your baby's arrival, figuring out all the whys and hows. Probably constantly thinking about how you could make your child's life extra special and satisfying. One of the scariest and most vital decisions for new parents or parents-to-be is choosing your offspring's name. Some folks stick to fairly common ones – others take this assignment far too seriously.
"Poke fun at awful names and naming culture. No name is safe" – an online community with over 41K members that dedicates itself to "unique" names continues to entertain its members with odd examples, and BP collected a few of the best ones.
More info: Reddit
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A Funny Break From Our Regularly Scheduled Ridiculousness
Everyone has names, all 7.9 billion of us – and they all mean different things to people, even if it's something common. It's exciting to think that, at one point, our folks decided to sit together and go through all the possible options that they found appealing, before settling on the one that they thought would fit our story.
it's understandable that each parent wants the absolute best for their child. You want them to have a fulfilling life, filled with amazing memories and great success. Incidentally, some might think that the name will mysteriously affect their offspring's future, so they make it their top priority to come up with something meaningful and maybe even unusual.
This Person Is Doing The Lord's Work.
Every generation had a certain set of names that was quite popular and up until a decade ago, it wasn't uncommon to encounter a few peers with the same one as yours. Whether it was a playground, a school or your workplace – there were always a few Davids and Sarahs around.
Who knows, maybe back then folks weren't bothered by the popularity of their baby's name and the only thing that mattered to them was that it wouldn't get their offspring in trouble with their mates. Mockery and bullying could seriously mess with a young person's mind, and who wants their child to go through all this trouble?
Don't Mess With Moonpie!
Oh my my! Here Kayl- Oh I mean Kaela, have some ointment for that....burn
Cinnamons! Serious
Sadly, kids don't have any filter. Little ones will say everything that comes to their minds and they won't think twice about it. This type of behavior could be blamed on multiple things: a lack of discipline, a simple thought outburst that often happens at their age – whatever it might be, chances are your child will still get bullied. As we all know, looks play a crucial role when it comes to bullying since commenting on someone's appearance is considered to be a norm even when you hit 40, but having a wacky name also messes with the way your peers perceive you.
Thought Y’all Would Appreciate This
She Gets It
Having an odd name could lead to some unpleasant issues, for instance, offensive nicknames. And when a problem of a similar character occurs, it's extremely hard to get folks to view you as you, and not as the nickname you've been given. When you're young, you don't have the time to think about how uniqueness will conquer the world someday, all you care about is fitting in, and preferably with the popular folks.
Finally, An Explanation For Weird Names That I Can Support
I Posted A Fake Name On Instagram As A Joke And None Of My Friends Have Expressed Concern
Any Hardcore Petnames?
Though, this decade is all about celebrating the individuality of each person, and maybe this is exactly the reason why we've been stumbling upon so many over-complicated names. People are eager to be unique and special, they want to differ from others and to be their own special person. Back in the days, it was rewarding to name your child after a grandparent or a significant person in your life, but nowadays it's all about individual identity. Fitting in is not "cool" anymore, which is amazing and very freeing – however, some people take this celebration of individuality the wrong way.
Maybe Her Momma Was Hungry?
Krissmiss Dae
Latrina
Prince John : Such an unusual name, "Latrine." How did your family come by it? Latrine : We changed it in the 9th century. Prince John : You mean you changed it TO "Latrine"? Latrine : Yeah. Used to be "Sh*thouse." Prince John : It's a good change. That's a good change!
By all means, naming your child something different is wonderful and empowering, but why would somebody want to call their baby that will eventually become a 50-year-old office worker Midnight or Calliope? It seems that in today's world, a name is more than what your friends or your teachers call you – it's an aesthetic that your parents made up in their minds, a social media handle, if you will.
Oh Dear...
Self-Awareness Found On Tinder
Til There’s A Technical Term For Your Child’s Name Manifesting Their Personality
Nominative determinism (just to expand on this a little for those who don't already know) is where Flora Baker gets a job making cakes or goes into botany (kinda a twofer), Milly Owche becomes a dentist, or DJ Turner has a career in music, etc.
In poor Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson's defense, his name is actually Chester. He CHOSE to be a Chet
Not sure, in this sense, if Chester is any better! Hahaha.
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Well, my actual name is Annie Bird and I did study ecology and I am fond of bird watching!
Wasn’t there a guy who named his sons Winner and Loser? Loser did very well in life, Winner not so much, iirc.
If you're the parent that would call your kid colin, you're probably going to raise him as a colin. If you're the kind of parent who would call a kid chet, you're likely to be raising him as a chet. Just saying.
furthermore, if you are a colin, your environment react to a colin and if you are a chet, your environment reacts to a chet
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My maiden name was Locks. I’ve spent the last 28 years as a hairstylist.
ACTUALLY, "family" is a collective noun, which means it gets singular pronouns and verbs when the family is being referred to as a unit, and plural pronouns and verbs when the family are acting as individuals. This case is debatable.
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They don't even look like brothers. I wonder if Chet is really named Chester, but it doesn't sound like a name Tom Hanks would chose... but then again, they also have a Truman.
Different mothers. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tom_Hanks
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My brother and i went to the same school as Colin (I was a senior and my bro a freshman in high school, Colin was was in 8th grade), and Colin was my buddy. Then I had the "honor" of meeting "Chet" (short for "Chester" btw) who was already an a$$4ole at age 3.
I was a nurse in a nursery 25 yrs ago and we had a baby that’s name was “ Trasheé” . I kid you not. Where is Trashy now?
In one of the Discworld novels, Terry Prachett takes time to talk about how the Carter family's children were named and how each of them turned out. Prudence Carter had 13 children. Charity Carter expected a dollar change back from 75 cents. Hope Carter was a depressive. And Chastity Carter became a lady of negotiable affection in the city of Ankh-Morpork. There were also two boys. Anger Carter turned out to be an amiable fellow, while his brother, B********y Carter, was kind to animals.
I could follow this "logic" easier if Colin Hanks raised game birds instead of acting. And, as far as I know, Chet/Chester isn't a slang term for a douche, yet here we are.
I once altered a prom dress for a girl named Random. And honestly, it suited her! Maybe a sort of nominative determinism at work? Like growing up with that name meant she leaned into the more quirky side of herself because honestly, what's the point of trying to fit in and be normal if your mom named you Random? Pretty cool kid.
We’ve had dr Payne and dr Hurt -anesthesiologists both Dr Cutter surgeon Dr knomore was a local medical examiner And finally Dr Pepper. He changed his name legally right before he got married to his mother’s maiden name Harrison. His dad was not there growing up and he loved his mom and sisters and he said it was not publicity he was shy and it made him fumble and he apologized to the mother but she said she’s happy her family name will continue. I can’t decide if I would change it or use it for advertising!
Used to have an eye doctor named Dr. Glass. Also, a friend of mine named Parker worked as a valet for a long time.
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I mean, Colin's 13 years older and has a different mother so... not really???
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Name them all "Cleetus." We're going to hell regardless - might as well hurry along.
Can we just ease up on the "Colin"? There are plenty of badass Colin's in the world. We just need a Bond Villain or two called Colin instead of Dr No... luv Colin
Yeah like in the old days Baker might bake bread, or Smith may be a blacksmith, and Woods could be a carpenter. An Turdpusher would work in the stables as per Monty Python. 🤣
I once knew an Eldred. He was most definitely an Eldred. That picture you have in your mind is 100% correct.
OR MAYBE! A lot of ppl name their kids things that actually suit them. When I was prego, my p_l_a_n was to name the kid phillip, but then I met him and he was clearly an Oliver.
My full name means pure and saintly. (I mean... it's the feminine of the archangel.) Another diminutive means 'fair maiden'. Gabbie be chatty and opinionated. I didn't actually choose it - my folks still call me the fair maiden one - society kinda... decided I was a Gabbie. Which, in all fairness, I totally am :p
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One of my dads ex-wives had a son named Chet. Every time he would play Mortal Kombat on the Sega, he never failed to get frustrated and yeet the controller at the t.v. at least once, and then he’d cry and yell at me for laughing at how stupid he was acting. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
One recognizes Colin Hanks but not this Chet cove. Who is he supposed to be when he's at home?
Don't Cassume Someone's Name Meme
You Never Know A Person...
You either hate her or you have to resist the urge to say, "EuripiDES NU-"
Roe-Why?
In Honor Of Mean Girls Day
Omg if you want weird baby names, search up nick cannons kids. “Powerful queen cannon” being the worst one
Unique-Baby-Names
Heros Live Amongst Us
Guess what her nickname would be. Namers should always think about nicknames and what the initials spell. I went out with a guy whose initials were F. U. K. A woman in my office was named Ana Lyses. Worse, some applications used our first name and last initial, so she'd appear on the form as A**L.
Found On Another Sub. Poor Thing
Your Name Might Be Bad, But It Will Never Be This Bad.
As Long As I Live, There Will Never Be A Worse Name Than This One.
This Is A New One..
Writing The 75th Khaytlynne Variant
I’m so glad my mum spelled my name Becki and not Bhekkeigh. She was even being bold giving me an “I” instead of a “y.”
Well O’kayden
So Sorry, My Dude
Really? All these examples of ostensibly loving parents giving kids names that guarantee they will be picked on in school and he's whining about "Chad"?
It’s Time To Burn Utah To The Ground. (Found On A Facebook Name Group)
Can I Offer A Crappy Facebook Meme In These Trying Times
Reminded Me Of This Sub!
I Thought This Was A Baby Name Announcement At First... This Sub Has Ruined Me
Crystaleanor Dazzlequeen… It Hurts To Pronounce
Unique-Baby-Names
I’m Not Okay….
My Current List Of Baby Names, Let Me Know What You Guys Think! 🥰🥰🥰
We Should Call Them Instanames Meme
As a Millennial, I would rather shoot myself in the head than name a child anything like that. Gender neutral, maybe, but "Oaklyn" and"Paisleigh" make me want to bash my head against a sharp object. Came across some kids named Lance, and Cypress the other day... I wanted to either laugh, or weep uncontrollably because of the names those poor children were stuck with.
Ok Which One Of You Did This
People Are Posting Valentine's Day Class Lists In A Fb Group In I'm. So Many Tragedeighs. I
Fell In Love With “Caisle” As An Alternative Spelling Of “Kyle.” What Do You Think About This Sibset?
Years ago I heard that Iceland had a list of approved names to give to children, at the time I thought this was a bit harsh. Now, looking through this list? Every country needs a list of approved names.
I knew a girl who had a number as part of her name. I'm not going to post it because she was a nice kid and google finds her quite easily so I won't be the one to blow her anonymity, but for the sake of example let's just say her name was "Tru2dy" and was pronounced 'tru-too-dy'. All her friends called her "Two" for short, but on her soccer team she wore the number 12. So when they'd call out to pass the ball to "Two", the opponents would sometimes converge on the player wearing number 2, and Tru2dy would get the ball instead. I asked her if her parents were hippies, and she sighed heavily and said, "Yeah, they were."
I had a boss who went by the name 'R0ML" (that's a zero, not an oh). It was more readable with a backslash in the zero. His initials were RML.
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My children are named Lucy, Ben, Olivia (usually referred to as ollie) and Noah - I feel like I should win some sort of prize for not adding random letters into their names
That's how you do it! Classic, lovely, normal names!!
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I remember once when one of my kids was a baby at the doctors, the nurse came out and called his name. I stood up and started moving the pram, she called again. Confused, I said 'that's us, that's his name' . She was like oh I was expecting it to be an elderly gentleman- Peter, his name is Peter .
Oh, how far we've fallen when the nurse can't believe a baby would have an ordinary name like Peter 😂
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Ok I know you all will be honest lol, is Essie, short for Esther (after a grandmother) cute and not-overused in a good way, as Esther is somewhat less common these days and Essie isn't common in general, or too unusual and old-fashioned? I don't even have a daughter to name yet but that's on my list. I'd rather know now! lol
Essie is lovely! And I’d agree that Esther is traditional without being old fashioned
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I have an unusual first name and it’s been nothing but a pain in the @$$. If people aren’t pronouncing it wrong, they are spelling it wrong. I once had send a credit card back because my name was mangled on it. Giving your kid an unusual name is not doing them a favor, it’s giving them a lifelong burden.
I have a normal name with a non-standard spelling, if you define “standard” as “English”. It’s because I have the same name as my aunt, and my immigrant family spelled her name in what *is* a standard spelling for their language. So my dad spelled it the only way he knew how, not because he was trying to be unique. It’s still a pain to spell it for people.
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I’m really exposing myself over here, but my name is pronounced “di-an-a” (yes like the princess) and is spelled Dayanna. I hate it so much I abbreviate it with “dani” even tho it’s not similar to that
My criteria for naming my kids was "I want a name that is uncommon enough so it is very unlikely for there to be another kid with the same name in their class, but common enough that everyone knows how to spell it and pronounce it"
I want to name my child something unique like in a different kind language unique but I also want to make sure it is easy to pronounce. If not I want to name my daughter Aurora or my son Connor
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If people put as much energy and 'creativity' to find original passwords than to invent first names the hackers' job would be much more difficult...
I'm a retired elementary school teacher. Discussing the odd spellings of student names before it became trendy during lunch in the faculty room, we pretty much agreed that one reason was due to parents not knowing how to spell. This was a small town where some of the teachers had also taught the parents of these students.
I have a white female cousin named deschantel and another white female cousin named Cobra. My nephews name is Tater. I dont know what my family was thinking
I knew someone who named their kids Dasani and Chanel because she liked the water and she wanted a purse
Holy sh!t these people. Not to be a draconian prick but seriously have some common sense when naming your kid. Some of these are absolutely atrocious! Downright criminal, I tell ya.
Look up bad Victorian names. This isn't a new trend.
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I went to school with a guy named Winter Monkhouse. No joke. He got teased hard, but he also wasn't treated too terribly, either. He was a jerk and he made friends with the other jerks. One girl kept calling him Autumn or Fall.
My name gets mispronounced as Coraline. Or i'm met with "SWEET CAROLINE! BUM BUM BUM!" thinking they are funny.
I feel your pain. I get met with "you're named after that girl in Steel Magnolias!" or "Shelby drink your juice!" Or "oh Shelby really" Uhhh no. I was 12 when that came out. A few guess correctly but not many.
Load More Replies... All these parents using these ridiculous names have already shown how selfish and careless they are.
My brothers ex-girlfriend had a baby named "Briley". Everytime I heard her name all I could think of was bridle and brine.
Didn't any of these parents think about their child being laughed at or what trouble they'll have when writing their name the first, second, ever time?
Whenever I've browsed through different sites about first names I thought how utterly petty is m country's government for not letting the parents name their chil whatever they want. This article showed me that I haven't truly realized just how vast and deep that 'whatever' is. Now I'm 100% glad that there are restrictions on baby names.
Weird names should be preserved only for pets. My bird's called Chika Chonky-Ducky Softique Banana Dumpy Cockatiel.
*sighs* Ok, I'll do it... I'm in my early 40s this isn't all that new. My given name is Gretchen, and like I said in a comment somewhere up there. 1 in 5 people I meet tells me "Oh my (Grandma, Aunt, cousin, whatever) has/had a dog named Gretchen. Damn, I hate/d that b*tch" I seriously hate my name
I used to work with a Gretchen and I adored her! She was absolutely the sweetest person!!
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My mum have one of them names, she needs to spell it every time or put up with people pronouncing it wrong (even though it's literally consonant-vowel-consonant-vowel) so she gave us normal names!
I worked in a nursery where one little girl was named (and I'm only changing it *slightly* for anonymity) Princess Adorabelle Christina Elizabeth [Surname]. Her little brother was called James.
I knew a whole family where most of the kids had.... unusual names. I don't remember them all but there was a Rainbow and a Boadicea.
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When I was watching Lucifer series I was so confused like no one considers his name a bit weird? :-D and now I understand that probably it made more sense than many of the above mentioned :-D... omg and the poor girl Latrina...it really is a wooden waterless toilet
My kid's name is David. Not Deighvid. Not Daevydd. David. I refused to entertain any vanity plate names for him. He's a human being who will have to live with his name until he's at least 18 and can legally change it, not a walking talking display of his parents' "quirkiness" and "originality". That said, I can't wait to meet his future classmates...
So many soon-to-be-bullied kids round here. Or no contact with their parents one day after they reach 18.
The more I see these names the more I feel that everyone should be given one free legal name change at 18. Or not be able to name the baby officially until the mother's hormones have calmed down.
I've never met another Emmett face to face. I worked with a guy, over the phone, for seven years. The day I left that job, he said, "My first name isn't Dwayne, it's Actually Emmett." I was like, dude, I've known you all this time, and you couldn't even give me one day that I could call you Emmett?
Meet my Emmet? He's my special Squeaky boy, he's soft and fluffy and loves lots of cuddles. Does this count? 20211206_0...30b464.jpg 
Or their subsitute teacher one! That one still cracks me up.
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My name is Esther. I have had many interesting spellings and pronunciations of my name...Easthar was the one of the strangest.
I once knew a woman in Quebec (French speaking) who had a daughter that she named after her heroine, Calamity Jane... so you might think Jane would have been a good option but no... she translated the word calamity and her daughter ended up with "Calamité" as a name. I was appalled. I hope she never had more kids as they have been called "Désastre" and "Catastrophe".
Someone told me that a woman had named her child La-a. Ladasha. With an actual dash.
I have one of these names. I pronounce it Jennifer. And honestly it’s actually helpful to have a name that strangers can’t pronounce. I can regularly not take calls from people looking for Gina-fer. (Sorry, wrong number) But I was conceived in the 70’s and I’m sure my mom was high when she came up with the spelling.
Just think - when I was in Elementary School in the 1950s I was teased for having an unusual middle name - Bruce.
Pregnant Girl I know: I'm naming her Dakota Cheyenne. Me: Why do you want to name your child after 2 trucks?
I knew a girl years ago who named her daughter Infinity Cheyenne. This was mid-90s, I don't think I ever met the baby, and that name has stuck in my brain when other, far more important memories have disappeared.
Load More Replies... Everytime I hear one of these insane names I think of George Carlin's name skit and Eddie Izzard's Englebert Humperdink's skit in Dressed to Kill. Stop naming your kids dumb s*** it's not cute. They will be tourtured. My cousin named her 3 kids very Gaelic names that no one in the US (where we were born, raised & all still live) can spell or prouounce properly. I feel so bad for those kids.
I'm going to call myself out and admit my husband and I named our daughter Aela. I did actually do research for a while and discovered it was an old nickname for "Angela", "Angelica" and names of that nature. Which fits because her brothers are named after two of the archangels.
Fontaine Siggerquist was my sister's best friend. We always said her whole name.
Remonds me of "Whats my name? Puddintain ask me again ill tell you the same!" No? Just me?
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I won’t have to tell you WHERE I live but a friend and I were in Walmart and in the buggy in front of us were two friendly little boys, when I was foolish enough to ask their names this was the legitimate answer. “Shooter” and “Trigger”. (No BS)
I coached “Gunner” and “Hunter” in soccer. The parents were cops, and said if they had a third, they’d name him “Shooter.” I live in the bluest part of the bluest state.
Load More Replies... I think the US should go the route of some other countries where you have to get your name approved through the government. This sh*t is totally outta control.
The problem with that is you’ll have Whitey McWhiterson telling second generation Americans whose parents are from Asia that they can’t name their children after their grandparents because those names aren’t “normal.”
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My dream baby name is pretty unusual as well. I want to name a further daughter Orchid because that was my great grandmothers (rest in peace) favorite flower.
Be careful because in medicine orchid refers to masculine attributes (cryptorchidia, orchidectomy...). Maybe you should consider orchid sub-species names as Cattleya or Cambria?
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18th century names like Murgatroyd (boy name) and Clementine (girl) are better than any of those.
this one isn't that bad but i knew a kid named A'Miracle so there's that
I’m thinking about Roosevelt but spelled rosevelt and rose for short as a girl name. Rosevelt Faye. What do you guys think
Sick of mine being pronounced wrong and it’s not even that weird
I feel sorry for these children trying to spell their names as they grow up. The government agencies should charge these parents with child abuse, or stupidity!
My parents named me Deloryce (a combination of Della and Reece). I never use it. I go by my first name (Tanya - pronounced Tan-yah - or Reece).
My husband had a friend in high school named Shithead.. Pronounced Shi thead... But clearly shi! head.
Conversely to this article, I listen to old radio shows on XM satellite. One is called "Yours Truly, Johnny Dollar" from the mid-1950s. The musical director was named Amerigo Marino. What a great name. I imagined him stopping people on the street and saying "My name is Amerigo Marino!"
We named our son Colton. Because we liked the name, and because his daddy was a jockey at one time, and we're still horse people, and, well, Colt, lol... At least it's still a fairly "normal" name. Also, it wasn't terribly common, when we picked it. I'm seeing a lot more Coltons now though. But, oh well. 🤷😅😂
I used to joke with a couple whose surname is Lane. I kidded that their kids' names could be Passing, Fire, Center, Exit, Pit, Slow, Carpool, Right, Left... We had some good laughs about it.
My brothers ex-girlfriend named her baby "Briley". Everytime I heard, spoke, or read her name all I could think of was either bridle or brine.
My first year as a teacher I expressed my concern about some of the names on my roster with random apostrophes. One of my fellow teacher said I should be grateful because at least I did not have a "Diarrhea" pronounce "Di-au-re-a with a long u and a long a". I am grateful.
I met somebody called "mensje" It's Dutch and it literally means "small human"
And this why people need to be careful taking names from a language they do not speak!
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What about Chobani? Tapioca? Covid would be a pretty tough name for a boy.
And this is how you can tell when the parents are being *really* selfish and just having kids for their own benefits.
Can we all agree some of this started with Stephanie Meyers and "Renesme"? Ugh as if there weren't enough reasons to dislike the Twilight series!!
The weirdest name i saw before the past decade was my friend Rainbo, mom is heavily a hippie. I picked unusual names for my kids, Azalea, Declan, and Ezra but spelled them correctly!!
100% truth. My mom works in early childhood education. She had a girl in class whose name was pronounced Sha-tey-ah. It however was spelled Shithead.
Thats just not ok. I like pretty sounding or unique names, but come the f on with this one!
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I have an unusual first name, and I have to explain it to EVERY person I meet. Parents, please don't subject your children to this. You're not just naming an adorable little baby, you are naming a future adult who has to put that horsesh*t at the top of their resume.
So this bad name thing isn't that new. It was common in the thirteenth century to give kids offensive names. I think I remember seeing a boys name in fourteenth century English church records named F-U-C-K-E-R. added the dashes in hopes of preventing the censer. It meant then what it means now.
do you know why people did it in the past? was there any specific reason or just people being dumb and cruel as today?
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My friend’s name is Catriona (She goes by Cat) and I’ve known her almost half my life, I have never heard anybody (mainly subs we have in class or teachers at the beginning of the year) pronounce it right. It’s quite strange because I always thought it was somewhat easy. The other day one of our teachers called her Katrina. She has been our teacher for the entire school year. We don’t even have a classmate named Katrina.
I'll leave my step daughters name out (she has a very normal, popular name) so her mom doesn't get mad if she ever reads this. My 4 kids are Gavin Alexander, Merrick Larkin, Bailey Torry, and Zoe Jayne. (I did not choose the y in Jayne, my husband did to honor his mother, whose middle name is spelled that way).
Woman I know that had to be talked out of naming her kid Velveeta
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Around 25 years ago I met a lady named Mary Christmas, I am not kidding, neither was she, she showed me her drivers Licence.
that reminds me of a lady named Happy Friday :-) it is funny, but cute. unlike some of the names on the list here
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So many silent letters. I bet the next trend is invisible letters. "This is my son Broskelin. It's spelled B-L-N- 7
My brothers in law have children named Paisley, (I have no idea how they spell it) Charlie and Andi which are all girls and a boy named Brayden and to make it weirder one of the brothers is also named Charlie and the girl named Charlie isn't his kid either.
As a mom who named her son Cosmo Vittorio BZ, (cosmic victory) I'm always curious about how people here in the US perceive his name. ( long story short, Cosimo is a very popular name in Florence Italy- from the Medici family- where astrophysicist hubs grew up) Thankfully, he LOVES his name...even when people tell us their dog's name is Cosmo :-P)
Most people are very tolerant of names that genuinely come from another language or family history. It's the "I don't like to normal spelling of Kate, so I'm going to name my kid C8" mentality that is being derided here.
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Unique names aren't a bad thing though. We're an indigenous family, my sons name is Spirit. I work in an indigenous school and meet so many brilliant students with unique names. I have never liked generic names. Nothing worse than having four Michael's and three Sara's in one class.
Is it just an American thing? I feel like the rest of the world might hopefully have it's s**t together....
Back in the mid-70's I worked in a neo-natal ICU. It was the time of 'Roots' and the beginning of Islamic names. So, Kunte Kintay Smith was among the names we saw. Also, Queenie, Princess and Female, pronounce fe-mal-ay.
There was standup comedian (passed in 2017) named Ralphie May. He got married to woman named Lahna Turner. They named their oldest child April June May and the youngest August James May. He said he did it to make them tough because there's no nickname to hide behind to avoid being teased - she was either April May or June May to every 2nd grader in her class.
My friend wanted to call her daughters Marie and Juana. Say it out loud without the and lol
Many years ago, my husband worked in a steel shop with twin brothers, named Rocck and Bricck. 🙄
There was a guy at a nearby college called Baby Aiden Standing In The Mist. His mum was an American hippy. Searching for him doesn't yield anything, so I feel safe to post it here.
Tichomír 'Ticho means silence (but it's normal náme in our country), Bohdan, Božidar and Božidara ( mean Gift from God They are All normal), Džastin (Justin but with Dž idk why), one girl named Ázia (it's Asia), and Mercedes Benz
the first 4 are normal slavic names, just a bit outdated. but yes, names such as Džastin or Džesika (Jessica) just because the parents do not know how to spell foreign names or they do not care. they deserve a slap (the parents), and then you have pppl who just name their kids after what TV show is popular on TV such as Hercules, Sandokan, Šeherezáda...omg...Mercedes Benz is top
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Ruby and Pearl are traditional but a bit old fashioned.
Load More Replies... Here's the thing- a unique name won't be confused for others in official records. The child will learn to be patient in spelling their name for other people. They'll also be able to observe others' reactions to their name, being able to identify judgy people and lazy company policies is an important life skill. Attention to detail is important. If the child really hates the name, they can always change it later. Some of these names seem ridiculous, but it's not my kid and therefore not my business. I worked wedding floral for 5 years and I asked every single person how they spelled their name, no matter how obvious it seemed, because it's a first impression softball. Super easy for me to spell their name correct from the beginning of the relationship, and it often won us the business.
I get asked how to spell my name, too, Heather. I've seen it spelt Heathyr once, on Ghost Hunters Academy. That one blew me away. I've been asked to spell mine more frequently. We've been having a higher influx of Punjabi and Syrian people in the region and they don't always recognize some of the English names, among others. My name has been spelled as Heddar, as Heather in Punjabi is pronounced Heddar and is a more masculine name (or so I've read in a book). I just spell it out for people. The times I tell people my name are usually for important documents.
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I hope my daughter's name isn't one of these, what do yous think of Dakoda?
It's not the worst. People will misspell it all the time if you go with Dakoda instead of Dakota, but at least they'll be able to pronounce it when they see it in writing.
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Ok I must admit I gave my kids weird middle names, my thought was it's unique and middle names are not commonly used for anything so I thought it was a way give them something different without it being an issue for them in life. My son's middle name is Kaos (pronounced Chaos, inspired by Roger Waters) and my daughter's middle name is Forbidden and boy did I get some MAJOR looks from the nurse at the hospital with that one!
I have a beautiful granddaughter who's name is Koliatra KaLeigh (pronounced Coal-e-au-tra Ka-Lee). The name came from a Cabbage patch doll when I was young... My daughter loves unusual names and loved it! The KaLeigh comes from my middle name and my daughter's dad's middle name. We have never found anybody else with the name Koliatra. Her other kid's names are Malakai Lee, Amias Addison Dean, Alexavier Micaden, and Arabella Lanae.
Years ago I heard that Iceland had a list of approved names to give to children, at the time I thought this was a bit harsh. Now, looking through this list? Every country needs a list of approved names.
I knew a girl who had a number as part of her name. I'm not going to post it because she was a nice kid and google finds her quite easily so I won't be the one to blow her anonymity, but for the sake of example let's just say her name was "Tru2dy" and was pronounced 'tru-too-dy'. All her friends called her "Two" for short, but on her soccer team she wore the number 12. So when they'd call out to pass the ball to "Two", the opponents would sometimes converge on the player wearing number 2, and Tru2dy would get the ball instead. I asked her if her parents were hippies, and she sighed heavily and said, "Yeah, they were."
I had a boss who went by the name 'R0ML" (that's a zero, not an oh). It was more readable with a backslash in the zero. His initials were RML.
Load More Replies... My children are named Lucy, Ben, Olivia (usually referred to as ollie) and Noah - I feel like I should win some sort of prize for not adding random letters into their names
That's how you do it! Classic, lovely, normal names!!
Load More Replies... I remember once when one of my kids was a baby at the doctors, the nurse came out and called his name. I stood up and started moving the pram, she called again. Confused, I said 'that's us, that's his name' . She was like oh I was expecting it to be an elderly gentleman- Peter, his name is Peter .
Oh, how far we've fallen when the nurse can't believe a baby would have an ordinary name like Peter 😂
Load More Replies... Ok I know you all will be honest lol, is Essie, short for Esther (after a grandmother) cute and not-overused in a good way, as Esther is somewhat less common these days and Essie isn't common in general, or too unusual and old-fashioned? I don't even have a daughter to name yet but that's on my list. I'd rather know now! lol
Essie is lovely! And I’d agree that Esther is traditional without being old fashioned
Load More Replies... I have an unusual first name and it’s been nothing but a pain in the @$$. If people aren’t pronouncing it wrong, they are spelling it wrong. I once had send a credit card back because my name was mangled on it. Giving your kid an unusual name is not doing them a favor, it’s giving them a lifelong burden.
I have a normal name with a non-standard spelling, if you define “standard” as “English”. It’s because I have the same name as my aunt, and my immigrant family spelled her name in what *is* a standard spelling for their language. So my dad spelled it the only way he knew how, not because he was trying to be unique. It’s still a pain to spell it for people.
Load More Replies... I’m really exposing myself over here, but my name is pronounced “di-an-a” (yes like the princess) and is spelled Dayanna. I hate it so much I abbreviate it with “dani” even tho it’s not similar to that
My criteria for naming my kids was "I want a name that is uncommon enough so it is very unlikely for there to be another kid with the same name in their class, but common enough that everyone knows how to spell it and pronounce it"
I want to name my child something unique like in a different kind language unique but I also want to make sure it is easy to pronounce. If not I want to name my daughter Aurora or my son Connor
Load More Replies... If people put as much energy and 'creativity' to find original passwords than to invent first names the hackers' job would be much more difficult...
I'm a retired elementary school teacher. Discussing the odd spellings of student names before it became trendy during lunch in the faculty room, we pretty much agreed that one reason was due to parents not knowing how to spell. This was a small town where some of the teachers had also taught the parents of these students.
I have a white female cousin named deschantel and another white female cousin named Cobra. My nephews name is Tater. I dont know what my family was thinking
I knew someone who named their kids Dasani and Chanel because she liked the water and she wanted a purse
Holy sh!t these people. Not to be a draconian prick but seriously have some common sense when naming your kid. Some of these are absolutely atrocious! Downright criminal, I tell ya.
Look up bad Victorian names. This isn't a new trend.
Load More Replies... I went to school with a guy named Winter Monkhouse. No joke. He got teased hard, but he also wasn't treated too terribly, either. He was a jerk and he made friends with the other jerks. One girl kept calling him Autumn or Fall.
My name gets mispronounced as Coraline. Or i'm met with "SWEET CAROLINE! BUM BUM BUM!" thinking they are funny.
I feel your pain. I get met with "you're named after that girl in Steel Magnolias!" or "Shelby drink your juice!" Or "oh Shelby really" Uhhh no. I was 12 when that came out. A few guess correctly but not many.
Load More Replies... All these parents using these ridiculous names have already shown how selfish and careless they are.
My brothers ex-girlfriend had a baby named "Briley". Everytime I heard her name all I could think of was bridle and brine.
Didn't any of these parents think about their child being laughed at or what trouble they'll have when writing their name the first, second, ever time?
Whenever I've browsed through different sites about first names I thought how utterly petty is m country's government for not letting the parents name their chil whatever they want. This article showed me that I haven't truly realized just how vast and deep that 'whatever' is. Now I'm 100% glad that there are restrictions on baby names.
Weird names should be preserved only for pets. My bird's called Chika Chonky-Ducky Softique Banana Dumpy Cockatiel.
*sighs* Ok, I'll do it... I'm in my early 40s this isn't all that new. My given name is Gretchen, and like I said in a comment somewhere up there. 1 in 5 people I meet tells me "Oh my (Grandma, Aunt, cousin, whatever) has/had a dog named Gretchen. Damn, I hate/d that b*tch" I seriously hate my name
I used to work with a Gretchen and I adored her! She was absolutely the sweetest person!!
Load More Replies... My mum have one of them names, she needs to spell it every time or put up with people pronouncing it wrong (even though it's literally consonant-vowel-consonant-vowel) so she gave us normal names!
I worked in a nursery where one little girl was named (and I'm only changing it *slightly* for anonymity) Princess Adorabelle Christina Elizabeth [Surname]. Her little brother was called James.
I knew a whole family where most of the kids had.... unusual names. I don't remember them all but there was a Rainbow and a Boadicea.
Load More Replies... When I was watching Lucifer series I was so confused like no one considers his name a bit weird? :-D and now I understand that probably it made more sense than many of the above mentioned :-D... omg and the poor girl Latrina...it really is a wooden waterless toilet
My kid's name is David. Not Deighvid. Not Daevydd. David. I refused to entertain any vanity plate names for him. He's a human being who will have to live with his name until he's at least 18 and can legally change it, not a walking talking display of his parents' "quirkiness" and "originality". That said, I can't wait to meet his future classmates...
So many soon-to-be-bullied kids round here. Or no contact with their parents one day after they reach 18.
The more I see these names the more I feel that everyone should be given one free legal name change at 18. Or not be able to name the baby officially until the mother's hormones have calmed down.
I've never met another Emmett face to face. I worked with a guy, over the phone, for seven years. The day I left that job, he said, "My first name isn't Dwayne, it's Actually Emmett." I was like, dude, I've known you all this time, and you couldn't even give me one day that I could call you Emmett?
Meet my Emmet? He's my special Squeaky boy, he's soft and fluffy and loves lots of cuddles. Does this count? 20211206_0...30b464.jpg
Or their subsitute teacher one! That one still cracks me up.
Load More Replies... My name is Esther. I have had many interesting spellings and pronunciations of my name...Easthar was the one of the strangest.
I once knew a woman in Quebec (French speaking) who had a daughter that she named after her heroine, Calamity Jane... so you might think Jane would have been a good option but no... she translated the word calamity and her daughter ended up with "Calamité" as a name. I was appalled. I hope she never had more kids as they have been called "Désastre" and "Catastrophe".
Someone told me that a woman had named her child La-a. Ladasha. With an actual dash.
I have one of these names. I pronounce it Jennifer. And honestly it’s actually helpful to have a name that strangers can’t pronounce. I can regularly not take calls from people looking for Gina-fer. (Sorry, wrong number) But I was conceived in the 70’s and I’m sure my mom was high when she came up with the spelling.
Just think - when I was in Elementary School in the 1950s I was teased for having an unusual middle name - Bruce.
Pregnant Girl I know: I'm naming her Dakota Cheyenne. Me: Why do you want to name your child after 2 trucks?
I knew a girl years ago who named her daughter Infinity Cheyenne. This was mid-90s, I don't think I ever met the baby, and that name has stuck in my brain when other, far more important memories have disappeared.
Load More Replies... Everytime I hear one of these insane names I think of George Carlin's name skit and Eddie Izzard's Englebert Humperdink's skit in Dressed to Kill. Stop naming your kids dumb s*** it's not cute. They will be tourtured. My cousin named her 3 kids very Gaelic names that no one in the US (where we were born, raised & all still live) can spell or prouounce properly. I feel so bad for those kids.
I'm going to call myself out and admit my husband and I named our daughter Aela. I did actually do research for a while and discovered it was an old nickname for "Angela", "Angelica" and names of that nature. Which fits because her brothers are named after two of the archangels.
Fontaine Siggerquist was my sister's best friend. We always said her whole name.
Remonds me of "Whats my name? Puddintain ask me again ill tell you the same!" No? Just me?
Load More Replies... I won’t have to tell you WHERE I live but a friend and I were in Walmart and in the buggy in front of us were two friendly little boys, when I was foolish enough to ask their names this was the legitimate answer. “Shooter” and “Trigger”. (No BS)
I coached “Gunner” and “Hunter” in soccer. The parents were cops, and said if they had a third, they’d name him “Shooter.” I live in the bluest part of the bluest state.
Load More Replies... I think the US should go the route of some other countries where you have to get your name approved through the government. This sh*t is totally outta control.
The problem with that is you’ll have Whitey McWhiterson telling second generation Americans whose parents are from Asia that they can’t name their children after their grandparents because those names aren’t “normal.”
Load More Replies... My dream baby name is pretty unusual as well. I want to name a further daughter Orchid because that was my great grandmothers (rest in peace) favorite flower.
Be careful because in medicine orchid refers to masculine attributes (cryptorchidia, orchidectomy...). Maybe you should consider orchid sub-species names as Cattleya or Cambria?
Load More Replies... 18th century names like Murgatroyd (boy name) and Clementine (girl) are better than any of those.
this one isn't that bad but i knew a kid named A'Miracle so there's that
I’m thinking about Roosevelt but spelled rosevelt and rose for short as a girl name. Rosevelt Faye. What do you guys think
Sick of mine being pronounced wrong and it’s not even that weird
I feel sorry for these children trying to spell their names as they grow up. The government agencies should charge these parents with child abuse, or stupidity!
My parents named me Deloryce (a combination of Della and Reece). I never use it. I go by my first name (Tanya - pronounced Tan-yah - or Reece).
My husband had a friend in high school named Shithead.. Pronounced Shi thead... But clearly shi! head.
Conversely to this article, I listen to old radio shows on XM satellite. One is called "Yours Truly, Johnny Dollar" from the mid-1950s. The musical director was named Amerigo Marino. What a great name. I imagined him stopping people on the street and saying "My name is Amerigo Marino!"
We named our son Colton. Because we liked the name, and because his daddy was a jockey at one time, and we're still horse people, and, well, Colt, lol... At least it's still a fairly "normal" name. Also, it wasn't terribly common, when we picked it. I'm seeing a lot more Coltons now though. But, oh well. 🤷😅😂
I used to joke with a couple whose surname is Lane. I kidded that their kids' names could be Passing, Fire, Center, Exit, Pit, Slow, Carpool, Right, Left... We had some good laughs about it.
My brothers ex-girlfriend named her baby "Briley". Everytime I heard, spoke, or read her name all I could think of was either bridle or brine.
My first year as a teacher I expressed my concern about some of the names on my roster with random apostrophes. One of my fellow teacher said I should be grateful because at least I did not have a "Diarrhea" pronounce "Di-au-re-a with a long u and a long a". I am grateful.
I met somebody called "mensje" It's Dutch and it literally means "small human"
And this why people need to be careful taking names from a language they do not speak!
Load More Replies... What about Chobani? Tapioca? Covid would be a pretty tough name for a boy.
And this is how you can tell when the parents are being *really* selfish and just having kids for their own benefits.
Can we all agree some of this started with Stephanie Meyers and "Renesme"? Ugh as if there weren't enough reasons to dislike the Twilight series!!
The weirdest name i saw before the past decade was my friend Rainbo, mom is heavily a hippie. I picked unusual names for my kids, Azalea, Declan, and Ezra but spelled them correctly!!
100% truth. My mom works in early childhood education. She had a girl in class whose name was pronounced Sha-tey-ah. It however was spelled Shithead.
Thats just not ok. I like pretty sounding or unique names, but come the f on with this one!
Load More Replies... I have an unusual first name, and I have to explain it to EVERY person I meet. Parents, please don't subject your children to this. You're not just naming an adorable little baby, you are naming a future adult who has to put that horsesh*t at the top of their resume.
So this bad name thing isn't that new. It was common in the thirteenth century to give kids offensive names. I think I remember seeing a boys name in fourteenth century English church records named F-U-C-K-E-R. added the dashes in hopes of preventing the censer. It meant then what it means now.
do you know why people did it in the past? was there any specific reason or just people being dumb and cruel as today?
Load More Replies... My friend’s name is Catriona (She goes by Cat) and I’ve known her almost half my life, I have never heard anybody (mainly subs we have in class or teachers at the beginning of the year) pronounce it right. It’s quite strange because I always thought it was somewhat easy. The other day one of our teachers called her Katrina. She has been our teacher for the entire school year. We don’t even have a classmate named Katrina.
I'll leave my step daughters name out (she has a very normal, popular name) so her mom doesn't get mad if she ever reads this. My 4 kids are Gavin Alexander, Merrick Larkin, Bailey Torry, and Zoe Jayne. (I did not choose the y in Jayne, my husband did to honor his mother, whose middle name is spelled that way).
Woman I know that had to be talked out of naming her kid Velveeta
Load More Replies... Around 25 years ago I met a lady named Mary Christmas, I am not kidding, neither was she, she showed me her drivers Licence.
that reminds me of a lady named Happy Friday :-) it is funny, but cute. unlike some of the names on the list here
Load More Replies... So many silent letters. I bet the next trend is invisible letters. "This is my son Broskelin. It's spelled B-L-N- 7
My brothers in law have children named Paisley, (I have no idea how they spell it) Charlie and Andi which are all girls and a boy named Brayden and to make it weirder one of the brothers is also named Charlie and the girl named Charlie isn't his kid either.
As a mom who named her son Cosmo Vittorio BZ, (cosmic victory) I'm always curious about how people here in the US perceive his name. ( long story short, Cosimo is a very popular name in Florence Italy- from the Medici family- where astrophysicist hubs grew up) Thankfully, he LOVES his name...even when people tell us their dog's name is Cosmo :-P)
Most people are very tolerant of names that genuinely come from another language or family history. It's the "I don't like to normal spelling of Kate, so I'm going to name my kid C8" mentality that is being derided here.
Load More Replies... Unique names aren't a bad thing though. We're an indigenous family, my sons name is Spirit. I work in an indigenous school and meet so many brilliant students with unique names. I have never liked generic names. Nothing worse than having four Michael's and three Sara's in one class.
Is it just an American thing? I feel like the rest of the world might hopefully have it's s**t together....
Back in the mid-70's I worked in a neo-natal ICU. It was the time of 'Roots' and the beginning of Islamic names. So, Kunte Kintay Smith was among the names we saw. Also, Queenie, Princess and Female, pronounce fe-mal-ay.
There was standup comedian (passed in 2017) named Ralphie May. He got married to woman named Lahna Turner. They named their oldest child April June May and the youngest August James May. He said he did it to make them tough because there's no nickname to hide behind to avoid being teased - she was either April May or June May to every 2nd grader in her class.
My friend wanted to call her daughters Marie and Juana. Say it out loud without the and lol
Many years ago, my husband worked in a steel shop with twin brothers, named Rocck and Bricck. 🙄
There was a guy at a nearby college called Baby Aiden Standing In The Mist. His mum was an American hippy. Searching for him doesn't yield anything, so I feel safe to post it here.
Tichomír 'Ticho means silence (but it's normal náme in our country), Bohdan, Božidar and Božidara ( mean Gift from God They are All normal), Džastin (Justin but with Dž idk why), one girl named Ázia (it's Asia), and Mercedes Benz
the first 4 are normal slavic names, just a bit outdated. but yes, names such as Džastin or Džesika (Jessica) just because the parents do not know how to spell foreign names or they do not care. they deserve a slap (the parents), and then you have pppl who just name their kids after what TV show is popular on TV such as Hercules, Sandokan, Šeherezáda...omg...Mercedes Benz is top
Load More Replies... Ruby and Pearl are traditional but a bit old fashioned.
Load More Replies... Here's the thing- a unique name won't be confused for others in official records. The child will learn to be patient in spelling their name for other people. They'll also be able to observe others' reactions to their name, being able to identify judgy people and lazy company policies is an important life skill. Attention to detail is important. If the child really hates the name, they can always change it later. Some of these names seem ridiculous, but it's not my kid and therefore not my business. I worked wedding floral for 5 years and I asked every single person how they spelled their name, no matter how obvious it seemed, because it's a first impression softball. Super easy for me to spell their name correct from the beginning of the relationship, and it often won us the business.
I get asked how to spell my name, too, Heather. I've seen it spelt Heathyr once, on Ghost Hunters Academy. That one blew me away. I've been asked to spell mine more frequently. We've been having a higher influx of Punjabi and Syrian people in the region and they don't always recognize some of the English names, among others. My name has been spelled as Heddar, as Heather in Punjabi is pronounced Heddar and is a more masculine name (or so I've read in a book). I just spell it out for people. The times I tell people my name are usually for important documents.
Load More Replies... I hope my daughter's name isn't one of these, what do yous think of Dakoda?
It's not the worst. People will misspell it all the time if you go with Dakoda instead of Dakota, but at least they'll be able to pronounce it when they see it in writing.
Load More Replies... Ok I must admit I gave my kids weird middle names, my thought was it's unique and middle names are not commonly used for anything so I thought it was a way give them something different without it being an issue for them in life. My son's middle name is Kaos (pronounced Chaos, inspired by Roger Waters) and my daughter's middle name is Forbidden and boy did I get some MAJOR looks from the nurse at the hospital with that one!
I have a beautiful granddaughter who's name is Koliatra KaLeigh (pronounced Coal-e-au-tra Ka-Lee). The name came from a Cabbage patch doll when I was young... My daughter loves unusual names and loved it! The KaLeigh comes from my middle name and my daughter's dad's middle name. We have never found anybody else with the name Koliatra. Her other kid's names are Malakai Lee, Amias Addison Dean, Alexavier Micaden, and Arabella Lanae.
