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If you were pretty online between 2013 and 2018, first of all, I’m sorry, second of all, you are most likely familiar with the somewhat hard-to-define sire called Tumblr. Part interactive blog, a repository for creative works, and a safe haven for fandoms, its influence can still be felt across various internet spaces to this day.
“The Worst of Tumblr” Facebook page actually goes above and beyond its name and shares hilarious and random posts as well. Below you will find a collection that should be entertaining and a bit unhinged, regardless of your taste, so remember to upvote your favorites as you scroll through and comment your thoughts below.
More info: Facebook
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#1
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
I’d hire them, and let them use their murder mittens on my opponents in court. They’d rip them to shreds, and make them beg for mercy. The Law Firm of Purr, Purr, Purr, Purr & Phfft!
Bouche, Audi, and Shyla, oh my! 2 years ago
Why would someone post an advertisement about lawyers with random kittens? Doesn't make sense. Those particular kittens must be the lawyers.
Bi Emo 007 (he/him) ️🇨🇦🇺🇦️🇯🇵 2 years ago
Could someone explain the purpose of the animal legal defense fund
RELATED:
#2
Marcellus II 2 years ago
Genius market research. "8 out of 10 robbers prefer our bank!"...
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Jaya 2 years ago
And even if the bear can't read, it is still only blind and not double-blind, because for double-blind not only the participant (the bear) but also the 'researcher' can't know which is which. (By the way, did I seriously write 'even if the bear can't read'? lol)
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Elizabeth Elliot 2 years ago
Genius. Imagine the advertising: "Nine out of ten bears prefer our honey!"
#3
Tamra 2 years ago
Is it the person who owns the stall that sells rat on a stick? 🤣
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Courtney Christelle 2 years ago (edited)
This morning I had to have my wiener dog, Teddy Bear, put to sleep. He was a few months shy of 16, I had him half my life. He wasn’t doing well and trying to keep him going would have been for me, not him. The only thing getting me through is remembering all the years I had with him and how happy he made me. RIP Teddy Bear. My shadow, my best friend, my soulmate.
Ruth Harper 2 years ago (edited)
That is the most pure, the most perfect love. There is nothing better in the universe than a kitty looking at you like that, especially when they then blink in perfect trust.
Part of the appeal of Tumblr was its key differences with other social media. Instead of focusing on the individual person, the focus revolved around fandoms, art, memes, and discussions. One’s personality plays a part in what one creates, but the anonymity did allow for more freeform content.
It’s not surprising that many artists, actors, and musicians all had Tumblr accounts at some point, before, during, and after fame. Taylor Swift, Lady Gaga, and even Ryan Reynolds have and perhaps still are allegedly Tumblr users. While one does not have to stay anonymous on Tumblr, it no doubt adds to the appeal.
#4
Michael Largey 2 years ago
Better plot twist. Since you can't catch the elusive cat, you shoot it and take the key. Then it turns out to be the shapeshifting woman. Then Rod Serling does the close.
#5
Lakota Wolf 2 years ago
I will full-on ogle dogs on the sidewalk whenever I’m in the car with my boyfriend. I’ll stop walking to ogle dogs if we’re out walking somewhere. He knows I’m not going to stare at other men, but a dog? Sorry, buddy, I’m gonna make lovey-eyes at every canine I see XD
Auntriarch 2 years ago
At a fair on Sunday I was looking for a particular stall (they do smoked chocolate chili peanut butter AND rat onna stick) . When my husband caught up with me he said, I saw you speed up and thought you'd either spotted the stall or a greyhound
Tamra 2 years ago
... I'm sorry. A stall sells chocolate chili peanut butter covered RAT on a stick? No, no, no... I'm sure I read that wrong. I'm going to grab some caffeine and re-read this, because surely my eyes and brain are not functioning properly. Be right back.
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Ruth Harper 2 years ago
Sorry, but dogs and cats take precedence always. Who can resist looking at adorable perfection?
Kimberly Young 2 years ago
When my husband's head turn while we're walking down the street, I always ask, "Car or dog?"
#6
cats_from_the_void 2 years ago
this is so wholesome <3 strangers helping strangers, i have faith in the world
CouchChihuahua 2 years ago
And i have faith in that guy/girl/their trumpet skills!
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Brenda 2 years ago
Any brass instrument works, as does percussion! Drums drive neighbors crazy, especially if you practice in your garage, with the door open!
Nichole Harris 2 years ago
My husband's a drummer.....I can testify that drums p**s off all the neighbors....
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translucent galaxies 2 years ago
actually it works even better if you don't know what you're doing with that trumpet xD
While still quite popular, or at least recognizable, Tumblr is still a pretty niche platform compared to giants like Twitter or Facebook. While this might mean less revenue for its owners, the flip side is more focused content and a more consistent demographic. The vast majority of its users were teens and college students, with at least half of its active user base being younger than 25.
#7
Szzone 2 years ago
Oh my god you're right that's exactly what it looks like lol
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Chewie Baron 2 years ago
He’s not even smoking a Gitain and he still looks French!
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GirlFriday 2 years ago
My future step-daughter went to Greece for a month and every day she sent us pictures of the cats she met.
KatZen 2 years ago
He chose that leafy grey sidewalk because of how good he'd look as he watched the people go by. Cafe culture.
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#8
Brenda 2 years ago
If he doesn't, I remind him. After 30 years together (26 married), his memory isn't what it used to be! 😁
Lady Bee 2 years ago
You are correct. My husband and I have been married for 40 years, and we tell each other that we love the other every day. Our belief is that you aren't promised tomorrow, so we need to say it today.
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Gardener of Weeden 2 years ago
40+ yrs, Things are really bad right now and I tell him how much I love him every time I walk away from his bedside. He can barely put 2 words together, but he still tells me he loves me too.
Brocken Blue 2 years ago
💜 true love makes the even hardest times a little easier.
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Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
I say it every day. What if one day I didn’t and he died that day? No. It’s an ingrained habit that I never intend to break, no matter how angry I might be at him that moment. It’s a funny thing about marriage. You can love the other person with a heart and a half, but right at this moment hate their guts. You get over the latter pretty quickly. You ALWAYS feel the former, even if it’s momentarily buried underneath the latter.
Colleen Glim 2 years ago
I always tell him I love him but there are days when I don’t like him very much. And those are two separate emotions
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Firstname Lastname 2 years ago
I tell my mate and my bestie every day. Not that they've forgotten, but it's at least one good thing they'll hear that day.
Violet Jensen 2 years ago
At this point it’s just a habit. Hi, I love you. Goodnight I love you. did you eat, I love you. Wear sunscreen I love you. Look at this funny picture, I love you. It’s just punctuation to our sentences
UpQuarkDownQuark 2 years ago
I can’t think of a day when my wife and I, together nearly ten years, haven’t said I love you many times. I understand that many happy couples don’t do the same, but what kind of soulless clod would be disdainful of it?!
#9
CouchChihuahua 2 years ago
I ship them. This is a much better love story then [insert love movie or something]
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Raelene Christie 2 years ago
My husband looks at me like that and I think I look at him like that though I can't be certain I've never done it i n view of a mirror . Second marriage for both of us and I think we both realised that looks and money don't count (that's not to say we look like Quadimodo or anyt hing) We fell.in love after being friends for ages and I think I speak for.us both when I say maturity certainly changed how we live our lives. We rarely row and talk about absolutely everything before agreeing to anything and compromise on everything, and you'll have a happier and more contented life.
Unlike many other social networking sites, Tumblr users are surprisingly prolific, as many do make their own content. In 2019, there would be over 21 million posts made a day, despite only approximately 30 million active users at that time. Compared to Facebook or Instagram, where the majority of users almost never post anything, it’s still a vibrant community, if somewhat reduced over the last few years.
#10
OhnoI’vebeencensored 2 years ago
Splitting the catom! Split it into its constituent sub-catomic particles, the cuarts.
Ikonye St. Jude 2 years ago
This is further proof of Schrodinger's cat's quantum superposition of states, the three cuarts perfectly align with the QCD theorem.
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Bob Brooce 2 years ago
I found an all black c at under the car late last night on my way to the garage. In the garage I herd a noise and found a kitten that was about 90% white. After it ran out the two of them were sitting side by side 100' away, so I figure there's about a 100% chance it's mom and her kitten. Tired looking, but couldn't find any more.
#11
Manic Mama 2 years ago
As a fellow Australian: If it can't kill you, it'll kill someone/something else.
David Paterson 2 years ago
The mosquitos are on top, everything else is prey, including spiders.
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Steek Insektoideth 2 years ago
Even though I live in Australia, I am also confused as to how it works.
#12
Panda Kicki 2 years ago
"How could you leave me? Every day there has been a very persistent burglar here looking for me. Luckily I am good at hiding."
Isaac Harvey 2 years ago
One of our pet sitters- sorry, "leased servants," in cat terms- once remarked how she didn't know we had two cats. We had questions, because we only have one cat.
Firstname Lastname 2 years ago
She is so gorgeous! And also looks so sad that she wasn't brought on vacation.
Wendy O'Shea 2 years ago
I sat a cat for a neighbor and I was so afraid the cat had gotten out somehow because I could not find her. Just before they get home she walks by like everything was fine the entire time.
This reduction in content and usage came about in 2018 when adult content was banned in an attempt to make the platform more marketable. This, predictably, backfired, as more adult-style content was quite popular. The anonymity and relative freedom of content originally made Tumblr a haven for people exploring their sexuality and researching others’ experiences.
#13
Elaine Morinelli 2 years ago
It's all their money anyway. Community property. Everything they each earn or safe belongs to the community. No couple should be halving the bills, for gifs sake! Put money into joint account and pay bills that way.
Bob Brooce 2 years ago
The day their husband sees this post is the day he should pack her bags.
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#14
CouchChihuahua 2 years ago
WHAT THE BRAINDEAD HALF EATEN SKINLESS CHICKEN?????
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Firstname Lastname 2 years ago
These are the things I would use a time machine to remedy. go back and PSA that nonsense.
Katy McMouse 2 years ago
Aw, f**k me sideways. This would have been handy knowledge 30 years and multiple sets ago.
Francine Oglethorpe 2 years ago
Stop the presses ...what now is this a curate...my daughter currently owns this....I will be putting water in to see....check back in a bit
g90814 2 years ago
Here's a puzzle: How do you keep Bored Pandas in suspense?
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Betsy Ray 2 years ago (edited)
Was the written somewhere. I say we start a class action suit against RoseArts.
xolitaire 2 years ago
It was in the description, but like another commenter her already said, most people got these second hand, which usually meant no description. It was definitely NOT written on the packaging
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Gabriela Cink 2 years ago
Hmm we did it with any felt marker which starts to be dry. Water or vinegar water. But i didn't hear anything about new ones.
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your sarcastic bestie 2 years ago
WHAT IN THE BLESSED POWER OF MARCO'S CHEEZY BREAD IS THIS NONSENSE
#15
Joshua Moore 2 years ago
Awww that's super cute and sweet. I hope the couple and dog are all doing well. 😁🥰
christopher mccarthy 2 years ago
and thats why every new girl will get a video of me and someones dog
Jennifer Hartigan 2 years ago
Seems this post many times, each time I think he knew what he was doing. Take the suggestion, fellas...
While many assume that the rapid reduction in usage following the adult content ban indicated that much of Tumblr content was not for children, statistically, only approximately 22% of its traffic was specifically for this sort of content. Many left the platform in protest, not so much because they needed it for adult content, but because they did not like the direction it was going.
#16
Brock Landers 2 years ago
Then you got the other cat at the foot of the bed who just can't be bothered.
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Orion Red 2 years ago
My childhood cartoons have taught me the cat was drinking it until the mom started to wake up...then stuck it quickly in the kid's mouth.
Legen ( wait for it ) dary 2 years ago
Yesssss, I miss those kind of cartoons
Load More Replies... Nay Wilson 2 years ago
‘If you won’t feed the baby I guess I’ll have to do it myself. Just like I do everything around here!!’
Fenchurch 2 years ago
My thoughts exactly! Don't co sleep when bottle feeding, you sleep too deep for it to be safe. Which this photo proves!
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mariahcareysleftnip(they/them) 2 years ago
and then everyone and clapped and that cst grew up to be ronald f*****g reagan
#17
Lisbettus 2 years ago
Or I don't know 🤷🏻♀️ teach and give access to proper contraception. Telling people to be abstinent is not the solution.
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Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
I’m 62, and wish I could’ve chosen mine. I have way better taste in men than my mother had.
JamezyJamez 2 years ago
I don't think anyone is that daft to post such a thing literally. How many times have you heard someone describe their partner or ex as "not the person I fell in love with"? The changes often correlate with co-habitation, marriage, parenthood, etc. An absent, abusive or otherwise bad father (or mother) is devastating for the other parent, wishing they could have foreseen it.
Bob Brooce 2 years ago
Is she just not smart enough to do a good job of saying what she meant, or is she only smart enough that she said exactly what she meant?
Osprey 2 years ago
Wow, now im sitting here wondering if some women maybe dont know they have a choice.
Blue_Mouse 2 years ago (edited)
This comment section is stupid. Does anyone realize that sexual abuse is A THING?!!! YOU CANT ALWAYS CONTROL THESE THINGS! Omfg. “Don’t have sex, wear a condom, etc.” im sorry that I was freaking raped, i should have wore a condom. What is wrong with some people?!
Blue_Mouse 2 years ago
Oh and to everyone that is going to downvote me, you are stupid. If you downvote, you aren’t accepting the truth. Believe it or not, women (and men!) don’t always have a choice. Many cases they do, but rape is not one.
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Disgruntled Pelican 2 years ago
Also, there is no birth control that is 100% effective.
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Blue_Mouse 2 years ago
This is stupid. There is a thing called abuse. It can happen believe it or not!!!!
#18
Jane No Dough 2 years ago
All children have parents, however many have bad ones. THEY ALL DESERVE GOOD PARENTS WHO CARE FOR THEM WELL.
Bandi259 2 years ago
I’m not sure what this even means? Seriously asking…what?
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#19
BC 2 years ago
You can’t. You take one day off every six months and pack in the dentist, doctor, post office, beauty salon, and taxidermist.
Auntriarch 2 years ago
I always wondered about banks, people who need them have money, they get money by having a job, and the banks are closed when they aren't at work
madbakes 2 years ago
You'd be amazed how busy some banks are. People who are retired are there most frequently. Those who work manual labor jobs typically start work very early and end mid afternoon. Most people use some forms of electronic banking. Anyone else who needs to come in usually does on Saturdays.
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Marie Dahme 2 years ago
And try asking for a day off when you have PTO time to cover it !(US). Lol….the day isn’t gonna get approved for time off !
Gardener of Weeden 2 years ago
Boomer here. When did doctors stop having Saturday appointments? It used to be that they took off on Wed. and worked til 3 on Sat. or was that just around me? When did many businesses stop having evening and weekend hrs? I have been a caregiver for almost 20 yrs. so my hrs are odd and I did not notice until recently.
Shane G 2 years ago
I'm in my early 40s and have never as an adult had a doctor that was in office on Saturday. My pediatrician might have when I was a child, but that's it.
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Carole 2 years ago
Twitter's character limit is the one to blame for stupid abbreviations. Sometimes you're short just a few characters so it becomes a habit to just shortcut where you can.
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Brenda 2 years ago
All of my cats, as an adult, have been strays. 5 strays and one I adopted from family that couldn't keep her. Best cats ever!
Kat 2 years ago
I have never ever gotten a cat on purpose, I just discovered that someone needed a home and I was unable to say no. I've never regretted it
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Auntriarch 2 years ago (edited)
We found our first dog howling outside the building. The dog was howling I mean
FantastiKitty 2 years ago
Thanks for clarifying. I would have thought you were howling outside the building in hopes to attract a dog 🤣
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RajunCajun 2 years ago
I found a 10 week old cat on the side of a over pass rolled into a ball trying not to get hit by a car. My son started freaking out "dad you cant block traffic on a bridge" I just told him no one is going to give me a ticket for saving a cats life. Even a cop drove by saw what I was doing and just waved.
Brocken Blue 2 years ago
The cop just waved? Didn’t help stop traffic? What the heck! (Also good going on saving the kitty!!)
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Nadine Bamberger 2 years ago
The Mysterious Cat Distribution System works in, well, mysterious ways....
A Very Bored Panda 2 years ago
I found my kitten in the shed, my parents got my older cat from a couple who found that a stray cat had kittens in their garage.
A Very Bored Panda 2 years ago
To clarify, the older cat was one of the kittens
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Collin Lyle 2 years ago
It's super easy to adopt a cat, you know, they basically just adopt people
Echo 2 years ago
My cat was literally found covered in ashes in a firepit.
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#21
Cara 2 years ago
Never understood the I’ll only date men over a certain height thing. We’re all the same height lying down!
Something 2 years ago
Good for her, but there's nothing wrong with having a preference. (There is a lot wrong with using the preference as a pretense to mock or degrade people one isn't attracted to though.)
Parmeisan 2 years ago
Nothing wrong with a preference, but it's a bit weird if it's a dealbreaker. I mean it's up to each person to decide but there's a weirdly high number of people who aren't capable of looking past it. I think many of them are limiting themselves unnecessarily.
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Saint Thomas 2 years ago
A famous french humorist, Coluche, said : "In life, there is no small or tall... the good length for the legs is when the feet touch the ground."
Linus Bourque 2 years ago
My wife is 5'9" (well over 6' in heels) and I'm 5'-nothing. As I often say, from where I stand, everything is in perfect line of sight.
Blondie23 2 years ago
I don't get the height thing either... the measure of man is how he treats you and the other people/animals in his life.... I mean for real!
Brenda 2 years ago
Grandmother was barely 5 foot, grandfather was 6'1. She always said as long as it matched up, it didn't matter! 😆😁😄
JamezyJamez 2 years ago
Weird post. Yes, congrats on your love and happy marriage, but I'm 6'4 and neither I nor any of my tall male friends are womanizing alcoholics. Many are happily in love, just like her.
#22
Gardener of Weeden 2 years ago
I never played that game. I worked hard at making sure my kid knew not to lie. IMHO it seems we have taken the "small lies" to a whole new meaning in politics in the usa. Is it bad to value honesty?
Brian Droste 2 years ago
Since he is a kid and a police officer, shouldn't he get two free meals?
Will J Dochartaigh 2 years ago
What about Firefighters & EMTs?!? My little guy would pass for a Firefighter anyway when he was 5 & 6.
#23
Katy McMouse 2 years ago
I'm a good driver, I'm a courteous driver, but every once in awhile it's refreshing to be the petty arsehole I know I can be.
Load More Replies... RedMarbles 2 years ago
If I'm on a secondary road and get tailgated I just momentarily pull over and let them go by then pull back on the road. I don't like being tailgated and having my attention be so split by keeping an eye on the unsafe driver close behind me. I also don't get the desire to increase anger of drivers close to you to somehow win the interaction, although pulling over to let them go by does seem to really surprise some of those drivers who I suspect weren't thinking much about what they were doing. Bonus that they can then be ahead of you to pick up any speeding tickets.
Goose of the Ahonkalypse 2 years ago
If I pulled over for everyone who tailgated me in the above posted situation I would have to do it 2-3 times everytime I take the road into town. If I'm on the highway and someone is dangerously close I will absolutely move enough to the side for them but the local 35mph road with pointlessly insanely impatient people? Yeah I'm gonna make sure I'm going exactly the speed limit. Especially since there really isn't much space to pull to the side.
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Nikkie Nothing 2 years ago (edited)
When people do this to me I will drop down to 1 mile under the speed limit and watch them lose their minds in my rearview mirror ... It's the little things....
Lucille 2 2 years ago
Right 😂 you wanna drive in a way that stresses me out? No sireeeee I will drive in a safe speed-limit-abiding way that stresses your Mario Andretti a*s out instead 🥰 enjoy your high blood pressure!
Load More Replies... Never Snarky 2 years ago
This is what we were taught as school bus drivers. Never speed up. Slow down.
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
Then if they pass you and speed on down the road, you can laugh at them as you pass them by when they’re getting their much deserved speeding ticket from the cop who was just out of their sight up ahead.
Hobby Hopper 2 years ago
I use to do this, but then I realized it somehow makes *me* more angry.
Ruth Harper 2 years ago
In Texas, it depends on what lane you are in. If you are doing this in the left lane, no.
Christmas love 2 years ago
On the interstate if I’m going above the speed limit and they tailgate I will find someone in the right lane and match their speed while I’m in the left lane so they cannot pass!!
Colleen Glim 2 years ago
Been with my husband in the rig a few times. The truckers tend to make a rolling road block for these buggers and then watch their little heads explode with rage
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Brocken Blue 2 years ago
Orange kitties are either complete darling airheads or stone cold competent hunters who should be named “Tiger.” It’s just how it goes
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Bored Trash Panda 2 years ago
I had an orange boy once, he was so stupid but the sweetest. He licked walls....
Grudge-holding Treefrog 2 years ago
My friends orange boy does that. He also runs full speed into them for fun lol
Load More Replies... Abby Palmer 2 years ago
Hey Pandas, how long do you think he'll have to wait his turn for the braincell?! 🤣
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
My void Jack isn’t the brightest bulb in the pack either. His sisters were a muted calico and a tortie, so I swear he’s a ginger at heart.
katiecat 2 years ago
My dog squirmed out of my arms when he was a puppy and fell on his head. He was upset for a while (can’t blame him, it hurt) but the vet said no damage was done. I can’t help but wonder, though, if that’s why he’s such an idiot. He runs into walls. He can see them. He knows they are there.
rumple slunkskin 2 years ago
My gigantic orange boy is so handsome someone once said he looks like "a deviantart drawing of a sexy catboy" but he tries to eat lotion and plastic so he can scare himself puking it up.
Raelene Christie 2 years ago
This made my day! My beautiful orange boy died when I was 18years old and 30 some years later I still chuckle when I think of him.
Ruth Harper 2 years ago
Meanwhile, calico girls are smart. Too smart. They can always get into cabinets, open doors, find and open the treat bags, get collars off, and generally rule the world.
#25
Lakota Wolf (she/her) 2 years ago
Agreed. German Shepherds are my lifelong favorite. My heart-dog was a GSD and my current boy is half GSD. Ronny looks like a Belgian Malinois and they're my second favorite XD I hope I adopt one someday!
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PowellSkier 2 years ago
"You want me to do WHAT for the camera? Say cheese? Now I'm all hungry."
#26
Legen ( wait for it ) dary 2 years ago
Teenager me meet a guy, gave him my adress ( before mobile ). When my sister opened the door for him, told him that is impossible that we meet because I was dead for 3 years. 😇🤣Poor guy
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Michael Largey 2 years ago
From an old comic book. Mickey Mouse: "You scared me,, Black Pete. I thought you were dead!" Villain: "Would you be less scared if I told you I was?"
christopher mccarthy 2 years ago
and she had a heart attack and died. and got back together with her high school sweetheart. ahhhh, romance!!!
Sami-Jo Ross 2 years ago
A lady stopped me and my dad at Walmart and mentioned my dad looked like her husband who had died like six months prior. That was a very awkward conversation to have in a parking lot.
Superninjatiger 2 years ago
Yeah, its kind of mean to sit and stare at a stranger for 25 minutes and then tell that stranger that they look like someone who's dead.
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#27
FantastiKitty 2 years ago
Idk about you, but depression definitely changed my brain. I can't do things the same way I used to, and that includes reading.
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Francis 2 years ago
couple of weeks ago i started to force myself to read again.. just some pages every other day... i miss reading but i kinda can't dive into books anymore?!
Lucille 2 2 years ago
SAME. I used to preorder and read the latest Harry Potter books in 1 day (racing with my twin sister). Where did that girl go 😂
Load More Replies... Auntriarch 2 years ago
Oh I can still do this. Just can't remember sod all about what I've read after
Katy McMouse 2 years ago
Neither can I. It's actually kinda nice because the book I read a month ago is essentially a brand new book/plot to my feeble brain - theoretically, at least.
Load More Replies... Marie Dahme 2 years ago
I don’t think my neural pathways are making new connections in my brain anymore. I think they’re somewhere backed up in traffic thinking…Fvck it. These neurons are staying right here. We’re done and checking out ! Lol
Jared Robinson 2 years ago
Nope I'm still there, The books just aren't as fun now. RIP Sir Pratchett.
Colleen Glim 2 years ago
His books are among the few I will happily read over and over again. And still giggle like a maniac
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#28
Tabby_Sohee 2 years ago
Man I’d be ROLLING lmao I have to remember this for when my sister turns 32
SkyBlueandBlack 2 years ago
Dammit. It's almost my sister's 37th. I totally missed my chance! 😭
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Will J Dochartaigh 2 years ago
Many people need it spelled out, slowly. People know all about birthdays, anything not on the list of traditional b’day stuff, just glides right over their heads…I missed 30 second’s for my kids, I’ll modify it for their 40 second.
#29
Twinbowser 2 years ago
My brother once wrote a story where a scientist made a potion that turned things back to their original state, but spilled it. The paper on his desk (and the desk itself) turned to trees, the plastic into dinosaurs, the metal into ore, carpet into sheep and plants etc. All very detailed. And then, because he was a little boy and liked gruesome things, went into just as much detail about how the dinosaurs ate the scientist.
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katiecat 2 years ago
Reminds me of something I did when I was younger. My teacher treated us all like babies. We spent an entire class having her teach us how to use read and write for google chrome. She SHARED HER SCREEN to show us how to INSTALL it. Even did it twice in case one of us missed how to find the search bar. So every Tuesday we had a writing prompt and I got sick of it. “Today seemed like the perfect day until…” and she was obviously expecting us to say something about our boots getting muddy when it rained, which is actually something someone did. I wrote a description of the earth opening up and basically killing someone very graphically. When she asked who wanted to share, I did, and she just stared at the screen for like a minute saying nothing. She stopped treating me like a baby after that.
LillieMean 2 years ago
I can finally be proud of the fact that I had to visit the school psychologist because of creative writing. Then I realized to reduce the volume of creativity and write boring stories. As a teenager, my new teacher was more excited than worried and encouraged me to write more.
Rune Rosen 2 years ago
Same. I had to go to the school counselor and prove that I wasn’t suicidal even though my writing was about someone killing themselves in graphic detail
Load More Replies... Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
Extraordinary imagination for a kid in elementary school. Definitely not your run of the mill intellect. That kid has a bright future ahead of them, as long as no one tries to make them conform and be like the rest of the unimaginative drones so many schools try to create. The outliers, the eccentric, the non-conformists—-all in positive and harmless ways, of course—-are the only people who give life color and a kind of glamor. Let’s enjoy them, not suppress them.
Endibb 2 years ago
I hate the education system in the US for this reason. School should be a place where you're allowed and encouraged to figure out what you're good at and who you are. Instead they try to cram all kids into the same box and wonder why they aren't all successful. Curriculum is based off end of year testing and making sure everybody does well so the school itself gets a good score, rather than where the child is and how can we help them learn their path. Heaven help you if you're neurodivergent or have special needs. We are not all the same, we have different interests and things we're naturally good at, and that should be fostered. It's infuriating. I wish I had the money for private schools or Montessori style schools, instead my teen's at a charter school and my toddler will be too.
Load More Replies... Raelene Christie 2 years ago
This had me rolling on the floor laughing. When My youngest daughter was 7\8 6are old she was doing classes for her first holy communion. One of the questions on a work sheet asked what their favourite part of church was and her reply was the MacDonald 's breakfast afer, I have never been Notre humiliated in my life.
Will J Dochartaigh 2 years ago
Not all students are polite little puppets, but it’s the ‘unique’ ones who have extensive imaginations. The majority can’t ‘think outside the box’ simply ‘cause they don’t even know there’s a box.
Belladonna.dreams 2 years ago
I wrote a story about a serial killer who turned his victims into dolls before hiding them in fresh graves. That was my sophomore year of highschool.
#30
Zephyr343 2 years ago
Now, cold water or hot water to brush? My wife uses hot water...I think that should also be against the law.
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Jen Mart 2 years ago
Dentist here. Put it on a dry toothbrush. Only time I recommend a wet toothbrush is if a patient tends to brush too hard, and then I tell them to run bristles under hot water to soften them up. Better yet, get a rotary toothbrush if you scrub too hard. And DO NOT LEAVE THE WATER RUNNING while you brush. Such a waste
MaximumKarmaSaint 1 year ago
Are you the 1 in the "9/10 dentists recommend _______" ?
Load More Replies... Red PANda (she/they) 2 years ago
Actually because of the meds I take I suffer from a dry mouth a lot of the time 😅
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Paul Neff 2 years ago
The second wetting is optional. Also, don't overuse toothpaste, the package shows WAY more than is best, you maybe need an amount the size of a pea.
Metalhead Turtle 🇺🇦 2 years ago
Or a rice sized smear if you've got gagging issues, IIRC.
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CHRIS DOMRES 2 years ago
Sterilize the toothbrush in boiling water first. Brush three times, one time using the other hand, tap the faucet 16 times, do one deep knee bend. Did I forget any other part of the ritual?
Paulsible deniability 2 years ago
What? No comments about how the wetness helps it go in smoother?
Bob Brooce 2 years ago
It's not as big as you think it is, so it will go in just fine. Assuming it's not to floppy, of course.
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Philly Bobcat 2 years ago
The toothpaste that never stays on the brush takes a sandblaster and two fire hoses to wash it out of the sink! Go figure!
wv10014 2 years ago
I put the toothpaste on and then wet the whole thing. Sometimes the water blasts the toothpaste off the brush and I have to add more paste. But I never considered doing it any other way!
Ken Beattie 2 years ago
Don't use water from the tap, dip the toothbrush in a glass of water, like a weird minty oreo.
Load More Replies... #31
Francis 2 years ago
when i worked in retail, i had some people closer to my age who would get frustrated with something, but they wouldn't scream. they APOLOGIZED for being frustrated LOL
Keating_5 2 years ago
This! Usually younger people even when they get upset will warn you they’re frustrated or will apologize when you point out to them they’re getting a bit too upset. A lot of older people will double down if you tell them this at first, but then later if I do a good job at continuing to mitigate they’ll leave apologizing for it :) Or just leave being jerks, but I can’t help that 5%
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Stacy Jones 2 years ago (edited)
Wait till you are the older generation. I tell ya, I wasn't prepared for it. It's SHOCKING the way you become invisible once you reach 40 years old, as a woman. I didn't think I'd ever be a Karen, but when you stand at the counter for 10 minutes saying, "Excuse me?" "Hi..." "Hello, can I..?" while people walk right past you and don't see or hear you, eventually you too will shout, "HEY, DAMMIT, DOES ANYONE WORK HERE OR NOT?" It's really like that scene in Grace and Frankie. I, too, have reached over the counter to help myself to what I needed once I sussed out that I was invisible.
Saint Tim the Godless 2 years ago
The same people who scream at you screamed at their kids the same way. That's why.
detective miller's hat 2 years ago
Worked in retail for years. It was always the older folks who threw the biggest tantrums.
AngelWingsYT 2 years ago
Work retail. Always the older folk that have a full p**s fit over the rope set up to direct lines. "This is complicated" "this is stupid" we get a lot....we have signs that direct you....and you just follow the ropes to the counter....i seen 3 yr olds do this without issue
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Lisa T 2 years ago
I have never yelled at anyone that has provided me a service, I’m 52. People make mistakes, so you discuss it politely, and not in front of other people if possible. So many young kids working their first casual job in fast food, get abused by people of all ages.
Gidget Girl 2 years ago
That's simply not true. The VAST majority of people who are rude are older. I do not know a single millennial who's ever yelled at a retail worker. Meanwhile...
Load More Replies... Blue Cicada 2 years ago
Senior citizen customer raises voice, complains loudly about minor issue (completely beyond clerk's control), jabs finger on counter. Teen clerk rolls their eyes. Customer: "Hoe rude!!!"
Ruby 2 years ago (edited)
Recently a lady got angry at me because we couldn't bring her every item she wanted. I work at a giant toystore, so we usually give directions to the right aisle, but this wasn't good enough for her. It was super busy and only had 3 people working that day. She starting telling me loudly I should because it's my job and would not let me finish my sentences when I tried to explain why we couldn't. Told me I was being mean to her, and I just said 'well sorry madam but you're also being a bit mean'. She LOST it, called me a b***h, said she wasn't scared of me, got up in my face and started threatening to file a complaint. I honestly would not have been surprised if she has slapped me. Never had someone in their 20's act like this in my 8 years of retail work...
AngelWingsYT 2 years ago
20s?! What a spoiled kid. Likely got it from mommy
Load More Replies... christopher mccarthy 2 years ago
your patience for nonsense drops dramatically with age. youll get it someday.
#32
Smiley MG 2 years ago
She said "kids".... So the kitty and the kiddy are together now...oh what joy!!!
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Demongrrrrl 2 years ago
I was in a PetSmart the other day when a man came in with his two kids. He asked them, "How can we make Mommy mad today?" I lost it.
Turanga Leela 2 years ago
Imagine the mom going back by herself to adopt the kitten, then sneaking it into the kid's room at night. That kid is going to freak out! ❤️
Niks Ki 2 years ago
Are there seriously stores in the usa who keep cats in the store behind glass?! Wtf! I am not even vegetarian but think this is animal cruelty. No matter what kind of animal, none of them should be displayed in the store so people can buy them.
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
Petco keeps adopted cats there some of the time and I think they are in a foster home the other days
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farm life channel Y T 2 years ago
My scheming mind wanted a rabbit for Easter, so I told my sister, We buy them a rabbit for Easter, and since it's a gift, they won't take it back. It actually worked, but after 2 weeks, my sister and I had been scratched so much by the rabbit, we were over it. Our parents loved that rabbit until it died about 2 years after getting it.
#33
Paul Neff 2 years ago
Points for creativity. Also, just saying, if the genders were reversed, this would have not been funny, but side-eyeing the BF for leaving you that way with no obvious way to contact.
Nick 2 years ago
Exactly. Instead of waiting patiently for him, she walked off.
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#34
Katy McMouse 2 years ago
Yeah, I know that. Some days I'm proud of my influence, other days - not so much.
Load More Replies... SadieCat17 2 years ago
My mom has the most immature middle school humor I have ever seen and it's great. So many sex jokes.
#35
Upstaged75 2 years ago
Our black cat is quite old and her whiskers have gone completely white. When she has her eyes closed all you can see of her is a void with white stripes. :) She also has a white "bikini" bottom on, but you can only tell when she rolls on her back. It's perfectly shaped like a pair of panties though - so funny!
TheNewJenBrady 2 years ago (edited)
I can't count the number of times I've mistaken my black hoodie or a tshirt, thrown on the floor for my black kitty
Bouche, Audi, and Shyla, oh my! 2 years ago
Grey tabbies are the best. Two of them, specifically.
Mandy Delaforce (PC Girl) 2 years ago
My 20 year old void is black, and her favourite bed topper is black fluff, located in the dark part of the kitchen. If it wasn't for the pink collar, you wouldn't even see her.
#36
Tabby_Sohee 2 years ago
Video games don’t help me “relax,” they have me screaming “yessss YESSSS” at the screen like Gollum when he gets the Ring. Get it right, EnochPowell. 🙄
Potato 2 years ago
Well, I am a recovering alcoholic, so if playing video games helps me stay away from booze--I'll choose the healthier coping mechanism.
Nikole 2 years ago (edited)
And if not, hey, at least they’re functional! (I joke, but you and I are in similar boats, Potato… Which is not a sentence I’ve ever imagined I’d construct.)
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Mat Hall 2 years ago
Anybody who chooses to call themselves Enoch Powell forfeits the right to an opinion on anything.
ॐBoyGanesh 2 years ago
I volunteer with and am writing about neuroplasticity & gaming. My sister had a TBI (traumatic brain injury) and has regained so much that she lost just by gaming. So I started reaching out to others over 50 or with brain injuries or memory loss that also game. There’s so much evidence out there certain forms of gaming (namely FPSs, which take the lead; puzzlers and rogue like) help with recovering, fortifying and building the brain more so than current medical and pharmaceutical treatments. Gaming actually can and does have an amazing impact on development, too. Quite the opposite of the BS Macron is spewing about violence.
Katy McMouse 2 years ago
I've read how gaming can greatly improve your reflexes/reaction time. That's something, isn't? Whereas 40 tweets per one day, day after day, just means carpal tunnel is a very definite possibility in the near future.
#37
Tyranamar Seuss 2 years ago
My friend had an arrangement with her next door neighbor. The neighbor would open the curtains every morning to let my friend know she was alive. One time it wasn't open- broken hip. Next time- dead. It's good to have a system.
cadena kuhn 2 years ago
One of my best friends would sometimes disassociate for weeks and not talk to anyone so she wouldn't respond when I would try to check on her and I would worry for weeks till she got back in touch. So we came up with a system where if that was the case she would text back . So I knew she was ok but couldn't talk
Sandra Morison 2 years ago
My friends and I started this early - just incase.....we are in our 50s
VioletHunter 2 years ago
This is a sign to check on your grandma more often since she clearly expects not to be found by family anytime soon if anything happens.
The Veil of Fire 2 years ago
My mom had a older friend. She would call mom 2-3 times a week. I would answer the phone. Call to mom to pick up the extension, "mom! Gladys is checking in!" From there are out old folk check in that they are ok. I do that with some of my friends. Always should check in just to be sure. 😉
#38
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
But at least, instead of having to look like I’m working because of all the eyes on me in the office, at home I can fill that time with doing laundry and getting dinner started instead—-while still fulfilling every single one of my work duties. Increased productivity, my friend. Plus, when I’m getting sick, but feel OK to work, I won’t be passing my germs on to the rest of the office. Double benefit.
Endibb 2 years ago
I'm actually more productive at home than in the office. At home I can think and not be distracted by ppl stopping by my desk and chit chatting. We all went in recently and I'm telling you, I got NOTHING done that day. Plus I get to see my family and pets more
Load More Replies... Blue Chambers 2 years ago
I don't have a side on the WFH battle. But companies complaining that employees are less productive at home doesn't make sense to me. I mean if the same work is being done at the same level wouldn't you say its basically the same thing?
Clown fish 2 years ago
Some times I laugh to loud and my boss looks at me but he never comes over which is good because we'll I'm on here lol
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Mickie Shea 2 years ago
When the jobs gets done, on time and correct it does not matter where it takes place.
Gustav Gallifrey 2 years ago
Someone asked me 'who do you work for these days?'. ‘Oh’, i said, ‘i’ve never WORKED for anyone.’
#39
I'M A SHOUTY MAN (they/he/she) 2 years ago
Just about to comment this! This was so cool his name has become a saying - not many people can say that!
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Teutonic Disaster 2 years ago
Wasn't there more to it, tho? Like pretty much the identical thing happened in the semis and he only qualified for those because somebody else was disqualified or something.
Gustav Gallifrey 2 years ago
Who cares? Maybe got through the semis by 'a miracle', but then...THEN...'miracle' No. 2! One of the greatest Olympic moments of all time.
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Jason Kemp 2 years ago
when you come from last place and win, we call it " Doin' a Bradbury" in Australia...
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
He won because he was the only one still upright going into the finish line. Brilliant fluke!
#40
Blue Chambers 2 years ago
If your daughter is sharing like that in kindergarten then she might be completely mute when she hits puberty.
Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 2 years ago
Nah I'm in puberty and if my parents ask I tell them EVERYTHING to the point they tell me to shut up
Load More Replies... The Veil of Fire 2 years ago
What a kid considers a do nothing normal day is not what a parents see as a do nothing normal day.
Agnes Jekyll 2 years ago
A friend of mine was almost at the end of the movie he was showing, and a student asked, "does anything happen in this film?" It was Rosemary's Baby.
#41
Brenda 2 years ago
My BFF from HS lives over an hour away (more if there is traffic-Houston). When my kids were little, she always came to my house to visit. She married later in life and had 1 kid. Now I try to go visit her when her schedule allows. And that's why we've been BFFs for 42 years and counting.
Deborah Clark 2 years ago
When is there not traffic in our city? My bbf lives on the north side. If the suns up it's like crossing through Mordor to go see him.
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Kurtz Frausun 2 years ago
It also depends on what people having going on in their lives. My friend that lives 1 hour from me, and drives Uber, will clock out and swing by to see me when he does a drop off in my town. My other friend that lives 10 minutes from me I rarely see because he's a new dad and works 2 jobs.
Gardener of Weeden 2 years ago
Look at the life of each friend. Friend 1 works full time, has kids, and is caring for her elderly parents. Friend 2 is a SAHM who's kids are in school and she has time to do whatever. Put more thought and effort into being empathetic to peoples situations.
Persephone 2 years ago
Umm... some people use all their "spoons" functioning. It's not necessarily a lack of effort or being a poor friend. Many people do, in fact, become exhausted and overwhelmed. Maybe you could be a good friend and accommodate visiting them???
Fabian Bernard 2 years ago
Same here...my ( ex) best friend came on weekend like 10 km from my home,posting photos all day long but didn't called nor answered mines. My ( new) best friend, who lives 1000 km from me, did a 200 km détour on his way back home after dropping his wife and autistic son on the best care center he found in France for a short stay that will help their son, just to spend one hour with me, eating a crêpe at home and driving all night to get in time at work. That's what being a trully good person is
Blondie23 2 years ago
This is so true!!! When my hubby and I were just friends he had to move to another city for a short time and we still spoke on the phone every day and texted. He would call me when he was on the road in between sales calls and we were just friends at the time. People make the effort for people they really care about!
#42
Marie Dahme 2 years ago
In my 20’s…I’m lucky I can remember the 90’s. One drink ? Naaaaa. Lol
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PlatinumTheCat 2 years ago
Am I the only one completely ignoring the rest and just awwing at this cat? 😻
#43
Downunderdude 2 years ago
I would have backed up a few feet and braked hard. Door slams shut. Boss comeback.
867-5309 2 years ago
Probably take the door off with a fire hydrant, not so boss
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whaaaaaaaaaa 2 years ago
Ok but side note: taxi men shouldn't shut your doors. They really are not paid for that s**t ok. We talk about waiters on here sometimes but we never talk about taxi people or people doing ridesharing. Trust me they're not paid well enough and for sure not enough to treat everybody like royalty. So please stop expecting such things from them, thank you 🙏
#44
Coyote Osborne 2 years ago
I am 5'10" and the number of guys shorter than me that round it up to six staggers me. I'm like fool, we can see how tall you are. We're looking at you.
Blue Chambers 2 years ago
Dating apps. Guys will put their height on there because a lot of girls on them say they won't date anyone under 6 foot. So basically every guy on a dating app is at least six foot. At least according to him and his profile hahaha
Load More Replies... David Paterson 2 years ago
I'm 6'3 and I've never figured out how I come to be so much taller than other men who are 6'3.
Flamingo Croquet 2 years ago
I never understood why some people want to have to use a ladder every time they kiss their partner. No offense to tall people (you're all lovely, too) but why the obsession? 🤷♀️
Deanna Crichley 2 years ago
They can get things in high places. They can see at the movies. Unfortunately they block someone from seeing the movie. Can clean snow off the roof of the car with ease.
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Robert Trebor 2 years ago
I'm 6'6" (198cm) and someone told me I had to be taller, because he was 6'6". So I got measured again, and he found out that he was barely 6'2".
Jason Marshall 2 years ago
My coworkers are convinced that I am 6'1 or 6'2. I've measured many a time and I've never hit 6'1. Now I do stand fully erect and not slouched over.... 🤷♂️
Load More Replies... #45
Panda Kicki 2 years ago
Puss in Boots got a weird translation here, the dog is called Perrito and every time they say his name the subtitle goes "Speaking Spanish", like it is his NAME you dont have to translate it!
UnpopularPanda 2 years ago (edited)
OK I think I know why they do this, subtitles are substitue to dialogues for people who are hearing impaired/have hard time understanding the dialect or accent. People who can watch the movie just fine without subs listen to "speaking Spanish" as is, they don't automatically understand it unless they speak spanish themselves and the movie/plot wants it to be ambiguous to the watchers as to what's being said. There are however scene where they subtitle a second language even when there are no subtitles for the whole movie, this is in cases where the "speaking Spanish" part is significant for the plot.
deejak 2 years ago
Agreed. It means the dialog is not meant to be understood by the audience--or at least, that it is not important.
Load More Replies... Raphosaurus 2 years ago
Why shouldn't they? Actually it's often a just creative decision from the director or producers.
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Zombie Gurl 2 years ago
In the spiderverse 2. They translates the Hindi people perfectly but when they do Spanish, [spanish speaking] seriously don't blame us that we decided to learn German/French over Spanish at school.
Inés Olabarria Smith 2 years ago
My favorite in Spanish tv is “hablan en su idioma”, they speak in their language.
Sara Wilson 2 years ago
And then when it translates, the stupid tv tells u that OVER the translation!
#46
Brenda 2 years ago (edited)
I have a few "wash day" outfits for things like this, things I wouldn't wear out - just around the house 😅
Kelly F 2 years ago
That's not the point. It's the brief naked moment when every scrap of fabric you own is clean at the same time.
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Bob Brooce 2 years ago
I once knew a guy who got to relax in a cop car while the cops did his laundry after they got a call because he was washing everything except his boxers.
Load More Replies... Marie Dahme 2 years ago
I have done this when I lived alone after my fiancé died. When my caregiver would be scheduled to come over to keep me connected; she’d call first. “Mimi are you dressed ? I’m bringing the boys over to visit.” Damnit. Gotta get clothes back on !
Flabuless-Jaye 2 years ago
My problem is, if I get on top of my laundry, and get it all clean and ready to put it away, I don't have room in my drawers/wardrobe/cupboard. I have to have at least two loads in the hamper waiting to be washed so I don't have clean clothes stacked in my room with no where to go!!
Legen ( wait for it ) dary 2 years ago
Me too, because after clean the house, I take a Sunday shower. Clean house, clean me.
Downunderdude 2 years ago
Can I come round to your place on laundry day? I could...iron your socks or something.
Kristy Sambey 2 years ago
That’s one of my favorite things in the world! Shower, put on everything-clean clothes, then crawl into bed with fresh sheets…put on one of my favorite shows on my computer that I know by heart so I can concentrate on reading a good book. Doesn’t get much better than that, for me.
VonBlade 2 years ago
I don't even need to open that and I can hear Heard it Through the Grapevine.
Load More Replies... #47
Wysteria_Rose 2 years ago
And then leave the bottom cabinets and drawers open so she can run into them.
Dusty Enherre 2 years ago
I KNEW it was a conspiracy! Acting all innocent when you're in the way.
Philly Bobcat 2 years ago (edited)
My wife waits until I'm almost done a chore... unloading the dishwasher, feeding the cats, unloading the grooceries from the car... THEN comes and says "I wish I'd have known you needed help!!!" She's lucky she's a hottie! LOL!
AnonymousApple 2 years ago
Why is this so accurate. Every time my husband helps me cook dinner, I spend the entire time slowly chasing him around the kitchen as he proceeds to lean against every cabinet/drawer I need to open.
#48
#49
R Dennis 2 years ago
The key to really good French onion soup is super slow caramelization... a lot of recipes add sugar to fake it quick.
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Kurtz Frausun 2 years ago
My attempts at making real homemade Ramen during the pandemic...we don't speak of that in our home anymore.
Azolane 2 years ago
Same with my attempt at caramel that would have needed a jackhammer to get out of the pan. No one dares to speak about it either.
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Tyranamar Seuss 2 years ago
I just had Thai for lunch. Delicious! That Thai iced tea is gurgling in my stomach. Got me some mangos and sticky rice for later.
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Ronald Nye 2 years ago
Ever notice pad thai is made different in different areas of the country.. I find it best in Chicago area.
Samantha Angell 2 years ago
I tried this argument on my partner and I can verify the logic is infallible; we don't buy things I will only burn any more lol.
Ronald Nye 2 years ago
Ever notice pad thai is made differently in different areas of the country. I prefer the Chicago style.
#50
SweetCheesySpaghetti 2 years ago
See, now this isn't fair. I guarantee that person is all "it looks tacky, and you don't need to be connected to the world for ONE DAY!" But, like, I have a heart condition, and mine alerts me when my resting heart rate starts getting wonky. So i have it on all the time, except when it's charging. Plus, lets not forget that its a watch. Are all watches supposed to be removed, or just apple watches?
Andrew Bridge 2 years ago
What do you need to know the time for? Going to be late for work?
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HeavyMetalHeart 2 years ago
No! I’ll be taking a lot of steps that day! I’ll put a fancier band on it though!
Kristie French 2 years ago (edited)
But then I have to hide the tan line somehow. It’s pretty obvious this time of year. Lol the band is white?!?
#51
SheamusFanFrom1987 2 years ago
I'd match, date and marry her on the condition that our second child be named Optimus Prime. Ohhh, I live for the day when the kids argue and I'm on the phone so I can go "Yeah, Megatron and Optimus are at it again. Em honey, could you please take that fusion cannon away from Meg? You remember the energy surges the last time that happened, right? XP
Michael Largey 2 years ago
Amazingly, the guy's last name was Megatron and naming a kid Megatron Megatron is just child abuse.
Lene 2 years ago
If it's a girl would she be named Megatronia? Serious ask. :) When we expected our 2nd daughter, my bf and I posted on fb for fun that we thought about naming our girl Carla-Aase because we thought it was the female version of Carl-Aage (who was this super annoying old man in charge of the block's local trash area. He lived right next to it and would spy on anybody who entered the area with trash to see if they sorted it correctly and if they didn't he'd SCREAM at them. Lol). My mom thought we were ACTUALLY gonna name our kid that and she texted me for days asking about it. My bf and I still laughs about that. (Sorry about that long story... just thought it was fun and sorta related to my comment about the post)
Jared Robinson 2 years ago
Yeah I don't care what kinda promise I made I couldn't do that to a kid.
#53
Vic 2 years ago
It was a polar bear.. the homeowner is not available for comments..
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KieLeaHar 2 years ago
We feed and give love and attention to our neighbours’ dogs because they’re just young guys and don’t bother… they don’t mind, they’ve thanked us many times but we thank them for letting us be near their doggies.. we miss our beloved doggies that passed away 2 & 3 years ago.
#54
ॐBoyGanesh 2 years ago
Semi-retired, but consult for my family business. If I gave that up, I’d have to change my travel & lifestyle to make to a natural death.
René Sauer 2 years ago
Only savings? to the end of the month maybe, then I would be unable to pay next months rent...
#55
Pink Princess 2 years ago
I still can't wait to be an adult because I have bad parents
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Eva Kašu 2 years ago (edited)
I love my life now. No constant stress from teachers/classes I don´t undestand and/or don´t ever need, no homework, no stupid people (kids, ´autorities´)to deal with. Just me, doing what i like and after work i can relax. Plus I live only with person I choose to. I love being adult. We don´t have much money, but that freedom is priceless.
Gardener of Weeden 2 years ago
And I truly hope for you, the peace continues. For many of us the stress of bills, chores and raising decent functional kids in this day and age is extremely stressful. Also for me it was the constant fear that I could be fired for absolutely no reason at any moment. I would prefer the worry of school to the fear of homelessness. But I only had a partially crappy childhood
Load More Replies... CHRIS DOMRES 2 years ago
Also had to deal with avoiding the ten bullies who daily tried to beat me up. Great fun.
Weasel Wise 2 years ago
Nope! Glad y'all had that luxury but others amongst us didn't get this privilege of a normal environment. 😑
Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 2 years ago
Everyone around u being a******s and minimal control over ur whole life... Fun.
Bumblebee 2 years ago
9-3?! That sounds like pure bliss. I've got to be at school at 6:30 am and I don't leave until 2:35
María Hermida 2 years ago
Adult life is not easy, but I wouldn't return to school/childhood for all the tea in China
#56
#57
Lakota Wolf 2 years ago
Any cat owner/cat lover knows the axiom: all orange cats share only one braincell.
KOTLC_Fan 🇺🇦 2 years ago
It’s such a small brain cell, does it even count
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Stacy Jones 2 years ago
I had an orange cat, Boognish, who was an absolute genius of his kind. Street-wise, savvy, excellent sense of direction, high-level of emotional empathy, and he once alerted me that the suspicious noises coming from another part of the house were cause for concern when I was in denial. You should have heard me telling the cops, "I know I wasn't imagining it because my cat heard it too!" R.I.P. Prince Boognish 🤍
mooshoflove 2 years ago
I feel like this could be an insult to orange cats... But I could be wrong..
Cathy G 2 years ago
Actually, I have an orange cat. We adopted him because my autistic son fell in love with him. But I told my son, you can only have the cat if you agree to feed it. Well, due to his type of autism, it took a long while for my son to do that independently and reliably. In the meantime, that orange cat quickly learned that, if he wanted to be fed, he had to come to me. We have an open-plan kitchen/family room. If my son forgot to feed the cat dinner, the cat would come and stand in front of me as I sat in the family room. I would then turn to my son and remind him he needed to feed his cat. While I was telling my son that, the cat would turn to look at my son as well. The cat, still standing in front of me, would then watch as my son would walk into the kitchen and fix the cat's dinner. The cat did not move away from me until the dinner was ready for him on the floor. Not so dumb. That is actually one really intelligent orange cat.
cartoon ghosts 2 years ago
My friends are constantly comparing me to an orange cat or golden retriever haha
Show thyself 2 years ago
*looking at orange Kitty-Boss* Hmmm *rereading last message from brother* ... BTG... Agreed! 100x agreed!
#58
David 2 years ago
Well... TIL . Not in my area apparently but we do at least get some of those bright yellow ones which are also nice. "The Carpodacus rosefinches occur throughout Eurasia, but the greatest diversity is found in the Sino-Himalayas suggesting that the species originated in this region."
Marie Dahme 2 years ago
They exist ! I love everything pink. Now I want to see these birdies in my yard.
#59
Brenda 2 years ago (edited)
This makes no sense 😕 You're already crying so you obviously already have something to cry about!
Jill Rhodry 2 years ago
It's saying that whatever you're crying about isn't worth it, so if you want to cry I'll give a legitimate reason to cry - but yeah...fun times...
Load More Replies... Delta Dawn 2 years ago
And they’re now on the internet en masse offering great parenting advice like “just smack them, that’s what I did with all mine!”
Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 2 years ago
And teenagers STILL TO THIS DAY recommend violence as punishment
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RabidChild 2 years ago
You know, they always said, "There's no guidebook to be a parent." Oh yeah? Then how come they all ended up using the same lines like this?
Jaya 2 years ago
Always thought that was such a weird phrase, there are thousands of books about parenting.
Load More Replies... Bored Trash Panda 2 years ago (edited)
Uhg.. I hate this so much. My dad used to say that to me. One time an ex roommate who is like a grandma to my son said that to him. I went off on her. Not ok. I don't know why adults hold kids to a higher standard than adults when it comes to feeling. They are learning how to control their emotions and, like adults, just need to cry sometimes. That is what I tell my son all the time.
Vicky Phenny 2 years ago
Your mom only has to spank you for "crying in public and embarrassing her" once before that room is cursed. I couldn't use public restrooms until I was 32 and had a lot of therapy under my belt.
Ashley Harrold 2 years ago
Just because your parents don't think its something to cry over doesn't mean it's not important to you
Jared Robinson 2 years ago
Maybe they were trying to help out the psychiatric friends who didn't have enough patients. ONly reason I can think of. Cause I remember this very exact and distinctive trauma.
#60
Settled for Infamy 2 years ago
Happening to me right now. I have a house inspection in the morning (common for renters in Australia) and I've been putting off the final mop till now 11:59 pm. Best self saboteur ever
#61
Noyfb noyfb 2 years ago
Your father was an idiot. Bet he never cried about anything. Tough guy.
#62
UpQuarkDownQuark 2 years ago
I have an idea. What if you make the handset wireless, and then put a screen on the handset for convenience? 😃
Saint Thomas 2 years ago
I'm pretty shure there's an app to show one on the screen ^^
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Magnion 2 years ago
Is that one of the type of phones for deaf people? The ones that show a transcript of the call?
Cheryl Ramsay 2 years ago
I am hard of hearing and have a captioned phone. My screen looks NOTHING like this. Have a look at CapTel.
Load More Replies... #63
Billy Harrelson 2 years ago
The problem with this is some restaurants are starting to post menus without prices just so they don't have to fix it every time they change the prices.
Em 2 years ago
That's fine, I don't care about the price. I care about not standing there going "I'll have uhhhhhhh"
Load More Replies... Stephanie A Mutti 2 years ago
how do you know if you want to go if you don't know the menu????
Sue User 2 years ago
Rant: sunday i decided to go out for breakfast. Googke restaraunt 1: no website. Restaraunt 2: only able to see menu through door dash. Went home. In this day and age , why is it so hard to view menu online ( not download a pdf) ?
Shawn Brooks 2 years ago
My sister and I went out this weekend after hoggling a restaurant and the restaurant decided to completely revamp their entire menu that week. Nothing we saw online was on the menu. They went from a high-end burger place to farm to table vegan style restaurant.
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Samantha 2 years ago (edited)
Shout out to my husband on this one. I always look up the menu ahead of time, he never does, well, we went out to eat with my family and he learned we only have 30 seconds to decide what we want to eat. (I have a complicated family.) Needless to say, he now looks at the menu ahead of time too.
AnxiousEmby 2 years ago
This is sometimes essential when you have a lot of food allergies. You need to see if they can accommodate you before you go there
Huddo's sister 2 years ago (edited)
With all my allergies and intolerances, I have to. Problem when they don't include things like gluten free on them.
#64
Marie Dahme 2 years ago
You should definitely get the rengora long handled bath brush ! Scrubby scrubby all the gunk away ! And half your skin too…but nevermind that…
Katy McMouse 2 years ago
But are you really clean if you haven't exposed the dermis?
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Karen Krause 2 years ago
I loved when "Buff Puffs" first came out. All the beauty mags and books told us not to use washcloths to wash our faces as they were too rough. Then came Buff Puff which were foamy sandpaper...
#65
#66
#67
Downunderdude 2 years ago
No. Better: give me a staff list, please and I will randomly choose three people to talk to.
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
Even better, give me an EX-employee list, and I will call 3 of them at random. Then I’ll get the truth.
Load More Replies... Katy McMouse 2 years ago
My nephew has an interview with a property maintenance company in a few hours. I actually found a site for employees/ex-employees to give feedback. I'm glad I did because the customer reviews were excellent, the employee/ex-employee reviews - not so much. He's still going but he's only 18 and extremely gullible and very rash, so I had to tell him not to accept an offer of employment right there and then and I explained why. I hope he listens.
#68
ThreeAngryLlamas 2 years ago
We have three huskies, one black and white, one wolf-grey, and one white. There is no colour I can wear to be safe. If I forget to sweep one day, it will be like trudging through the deep snow of a Canadian winter in here.
Gardener of Weeden 2 years ago
Had a Keeshond, white fur with black tips. At that point I decided I do not care if I have a "fur" coat. I will wear my pups fur with pride, LOL
Load More Replies... Sue User 2 years ago
I once took a black coat to the cleaners. When I picked it up, I got a lecture on how hard it was to ckean and if there was still cat hair ( white) on it it was not their fault.
Mike Fitzpatrick 2 years ago
My little dog sheds like crazy, I go to the $ store and grab their lint rollers 6-8 at a time. Those little beggars are life savers.
Load More Replies... Bouche, Audi, and Shyla, oh my! 2 years ago
I got some of Audi's fur up my nose, and when I sneezed, he looked mortally offended. I told him not to shed in my nose if he didn't want me to sneeze.
Philly Bobcat 2 years ago
I have calicoes... a fur color to contrast every flippin' thing I own!!
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
Clothing designers: Please just give in and make this fashionable, ffs.
Benita Valdez 2 years ago
I have two dogs. Both are adopted mutts that are hound/ pitbull mixes that we did DNA testing for out of curiosity. One has a lovely short sleek coat and the other a medium double coat because his great grandpa was a golden retriever; he sheds just like one. There is never ending shedding from this jerk but I still love him
#69
Brenda 2 years ago
Omg! Freaking BRILLIANT! How do we get this made mandatory on all vehicles!?!
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
AND if you leave your turn signal on, your car will keep turning in circles til you turn it off—-and you will be fined for obstructing traffic.
Dirk Daring 2 years ago
Some of you have never had to swerve suddenly on the highway to avoid running over a ladder or a hobo and it shows.
#70
Brenda 2 years ago
Santa/tooth fairy/Easter bunny won't come if your room is messy. Worked til about 6
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
That turning the interior light on in the car is illegal.
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Steve Johnston 2 years ago
When my daughters we're about 4 and 5 my wife told them a white lie that she was 11 years younger than me, when in fact she is 1 year younger than me. This lie was maintained for years , they used to give her birthday cards with the wrong age. My wife never corrected them and they never questioned it. I posed the question if I was 21 when your mum and I started going out together, how old was your mum? They both came back straight away with 10. Periodically I would ask them again, thinking they would click and realise that she wasn't being truthful. They never did. When they got to about 9 and 10 and started learning safeguarding lessons in school. I gave my wife an ultimatum she tells them the truth or I do. I didn't want them thinking their dad was a weird pedo. . In the end she told them the truth. They were quite upset that they had been lied to for years and they didn't have a super-young mum, but at least I didn't end up getting arrested.
Little Miss Betty 2 years ago
The ice cream van only plays music when it's ran out of treats 🤷
#71
Persephone 2 years ago
I've known someone with narcissistic personality disorder who can do this bc he is incapable if processing guilt and responsibility... makes it easy I suppose when you are raised without empathy and require a scapegoat. For many others, this is depression, adhd, or a plethora of other things.
Hobby Hopper 2 years ago
Just think about it on a geological time scale, and then all the human drama seems insignificant.
#72
Brenda 2 years ago
Watch them assemble furniture a/or unstring Christmas lights. Hubby got lucky i never saw tthese before marriage! 😆😅🤣
Gardener of Weeden 2 years ago
Furniture that is easy - IF they read the directions. BUT the true test is the man / or woman's patience and resolve when untangling and testing light strings. If they can do it and not totally lose their st, keeper. lol
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Firstname Lastname 2 years ago
Yes, but amending point 1 to also eat a bowl of pasta. I cannot stand to be next to my mate when I hear all the slurping and chewing of his sauced up noodles.
Kiss Army 2 years ago
When we got married, my husband and I both preferred the left side of the bed. He let me have it but continually got up after I fell asleep snuggled against him and switched to my left side and nudged me over to the right. He figured it was ok because I got to fall asleep on my preferred side. After about a month I gave in and now I sleep on the right side.
#73
Gavin Johnson 2 years ago
I don’t know which season this is, but Mission Winnow, MW, first appeared around 2018, since then the fastest Pit Stop Award has been won by Red Bull. This award gives points at each race for the fastest times and there’s a league table of these. Red Bull are widely acknowledged as the fastest team in the pits, rarely are they troubled by Ferrari.
#74
Huddo's sister 2 years ago (edited)
Yeah, when the amygdala thinks you are in trouble (anxiety) it's fight, flight, and most often in this case, freeze. You can't easily recall things or make strong new memories, among other things.
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#75
#76
Philly Bobcat 2 years ago (edited)
At our restaraunt (Fine Italian) we make home (hand) made linguini. To experience this amazing plate either with our marinara or vodka sauce, you MUST enjoy it in house. If you order it to go, by the time you get it home, it will be like glue. Please don't do this! Like ordering Ahi Tuna well done... just go get a can of cat food and have at it! LOL!
#77
Julie Zugz 2 years ago
Of course it's black and white. We don't put enough money in our schools for them to print in color
Brenda 2 years ago
I'd be getting rid of the Lorax! Hated that they turned a Dr Seuss book into a political statement
James Fuller 2 years ago (edited)
You understand that the book Dr. Seuss wrote was ALWAYS designed to make a very specific environmental and political statement? Like that was his express intent from the beginning?
Load More Replies... #78
Sneaky Snake 2 years ago
And with only the father working, had three kids going to school and a happy dog & a grumpy cat. Whoaaa
Katy McMouse 2 years ago
I think Gen X was the last batch of suckers that believed that was possible.
Load More Replies... Weasel Wise 2 years ago
I was wondering the same thing. How was it that only 30 years ago my dad, with his lame income, could support our family of five, all of our pets, and buy a house....oh wait, corporate greed and zero restrictions on them stealing. Luckily us lamen have all sorts of laws about if we steal from them.
Paul Brown 2 years ago
My step-dad, a plumber bought a house on just his pay. Mom stayed at home, 4 kids and in the summer we spent every weekend at the beach in a trailer he bought too.
Jennifer Deren 2 years ago
This is a very common misconception. We think that because to us $20,000 for a 2-bedroom home is dirt *ss cheap. The problem is, $20,000 back then is about equal to $230,000 today. So, while it feels like it was easier to get a house back then, it wasn't. Don't believe what you see on TV folks, or everything you read online. You want a good example of how things haven't really changed? Watch the Murdoch Mysteries. A full-time detective who only makes enough to rent a room in a boarding house during the turn of the 20th century. Despite what people may think, even back then, having a full-time job didn't mean you could afford a house on your own. Needing roommates and having two working spouses to cover expenses are not new concepts, we just don't notice because they don't visualize it much in what we watch.
#79
Unproductive Pigeon 2 years ago
Idk what kind of cats you guys have but my cats would never throw their dignity aside like this and come just bc I called them. Apparently I’m not worthy of their awe-inspiring presence :’)
Osprey 2 years ago
I call and he comes and taps my arm with his paw till I pat the bed next to me and he hops up with a prrrow! and finds his spot so i can pet him till we both fall asleep. He asks permission to get onto the bed. He is an ORANGE TABBY. Very smart cat.
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MelFunction 2 years ago
Mine only do that if I say "Who loves me?" Which is also what I say when I want to give them a treat.
#80
Michael Largey 2 years ago
Note there is no provision for being available by both text message and telephone call.
Isaac Harvey 2 years ago
If I'm expected to have a reason to justify doing something, that in and of itself is a reason.
#81
SparkDragon 2 years ago (edited)
Years back I was cat sitting for my mother. My then-boyfriend (now husband) and I were watching TV when I suddenly leapt up shouting "take it out!", like a crazy person. One of the cats had been doing the 'ice cream van' meow from the next room, meaning they were about to dump some (hopefully) dead rodent on the floor. If course, he, having never lived with cats, had no idea what the f**k was going on.
My O My 2 years ago
Quick! Feed the cat or else it'll bring live mice in by the hour
Load More Replies... Shark Lady 2 years ago
Mine spends most of the day shouting at me, all she wants is me to acknowledge her presence, unless she sticks her tongue out after each shout - that means she's decided it's dinner time.
Weasel Wise 2 years ago
Cats are mammals and have different words and tones just like every other mammal... it's a good match when two different species of mammal lacking the same language can understand one another.
RajunCajun 2 years ago
my cat has a long Mew for food and two quick Mew for the water is empty. it was less than a week for him to teach me that.
Show thyself 2 years ago
Imagine your cat-car scratching on the garagedoor mewing, clattering, purring to get in for a nice engine-scratch
MaximumKarmaSaint 2 years ago
The engine gets hotter as you keep scratching, a test of endurance.
Load More Replies... Bouche, Audi, and Shyla, oh my! 2 years ago
Mine come when I whistle. When Bouche was a kitten, she'd have to come investigate that strange noise, and would usually stay for pets. When Audi came, I wanted Bouche to understand she was still my girl, so I whistled for her when I could give her extra attention. Audi quickly figured out that a whistling soft can-opener means it's petting time.
#82
Brenda 2 years ago
Cause, you know, we get off at 5pm. That's plenty of time to get to your bank in rush hour traffic. NOT!
Philly Bobcat 2 years ago
It's Thursday, 12:15 PM and 80 degrees! Well HELL! On that note, I think I need to get a loan!!
Just Another Girl 2 years ago
Or…here’s a wild idea…..use ONLINE BANKING and…..wait for it….. MOBILE DEPOSIT. I really can’t figure out why ppl still want to go to the bank when even small banks have made it super easy to never have to.
#83
CHRIS DOMRES 2 years ago
And how exactly is an absent person who does not respond considered a friend?
Weasel Wise 2 years ago
My sister-from-another-mister and I will go weeks without texting, sometimes forget to reply to each other, and we haven't seen each other in several years....cuz LIFE. But we're amazing friends and have COMPASSION for one another.
Load More Replies... #84
rob 2 years ago
To be fair no person should force someone else to become vegan/vegetarian if they dont want to.
Jaya 2 years ago
Agree, but we don't know if she did though. He may have enthousiastically agreed to the pact (because he thought it was a good idea at the time, or because he wanted her to think that's the kind of guy he is), so she may not know he doesn't really want to.
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zena bena 2 years ago
Surprized she didnt smell that greasy kfc smell but people saying trust,cheatin issue give me a break it's food ffs
Paul Neff 2 years ago
Oh, it is even funnier. The only way she could avoid smelling it on him, is if she was doing something similar to make her blind to the smell.
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#85
Eileenabean 2 years ago
Wash your hands before doing anything. Exfoliate twice a week. Cleanse morning and night, if it has been a particularly sweaty day, you can wash your face twice in a row at night. Use a CLEAN towel to dry your face. Or air dry. Start with a toner and serum. You Have to find out what works with your face and then moisturizer sunscreen and eye cream. I got so far as to also use eye serum. And drink lots of water. Use lighter products for during the day and heavier products at night. And look into getting Differin? How to use it and what the retinoid does for skin. The Ordinary has nice products for nice prices!
Load More Replies... CHRIS DOMRES 2 years ago
Easy. Just use an abrasive scrub pad on your face three times a week.
#86
Katy McMouse 2 years ago (edited)
Whaaat? That thing better prep, cook, serve, and load the dishwasher.
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Pam Belcher 2 years ago
I wish I bought one 30 years ago. I turn 68 this month so spending $300 just seems ridiculous right?
Procrastinating.... 2 years ago
I REALLY wanted the millennium falcon over glove / pot holder....but it was not to be☹️
#87
Sneaky Snake 2 years ago
Or tell us that you're scared too. You don't have to kill yourselves. Most women will ask you not to go to check on the noise either way.
Weasel Wise 2 years ago
Right? Lie to her about other women trying to get with him. Way better than sharing empathy. 🙄
Load More Replies... Sarel Seerower 2 years ago
If you trick your girlfriend into checking when you are too scared, you shouldn't be with her
#88
Gardener of Weeden 2 years ago
Talked to my therapist, she said she needed to do a evaluation to see if I had anxiety and or depression... We laughed and laughed. I asked how did she feel about me being worse then when we started, and I laughed and laughed. (In her defense I am going through a REALLY REALLY bad situation that no one would not have issues with).
bottomless.abyss.of.bordem 2 years ago
Doctors make a lot of money and can set their own hours.....so there ya go.
Noyfb noyfb 2 years ago
Learn a bit more about the actual world of work and pay for MDs.
Load More Replies... I'M A SHOUTY MAN (they/he/she) 2 years ago (edited)
oh, uh, ok, umm, well i learnt something new today
#89
Ian Reynolds 2 years ago
I just want EA to re-release Star Wars Battlefront 2, that was on the PS2, instead of the POS they released a few years ago.
SheamusFanFrom1987 2 years ago
I concur. Dark Souls made me tear some of my hear out but overall a great experience. EA ought to take notes.
#90
Weasel Wise 2 years ago
Like dogs, they're puppies until about 10yo, then they're old puppies.
Giulia Fortunati 2 years ago
I always tell my dog the she's a small wee puppy! She's 3yo and 30kg!
#91
Jill Rhodry 2 years ago
Many, many moons ago, we'd call the cops to our own parties, turn the music down and have pizza delivered around the same time to share a slice with them - any further calls they got after that they never worried about because they've already attended.
#92
Mike Fitzpatrick 2 years ago
Hot wings at 11pm. I'm selling antacids for $1 a pop beginning at midnight. 😇
#93
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago
Bottle caps, twist ties, scrunches and hair bands will go missing. Some may be found under the couch or fridge. Others will never ever be seen again.
#94
#95
Turd Ferguson 2 years ago
Who asks "body type" when talking about a car? Such a weird way to put it
#96
Marie Dahme 2 years ago
On my way. ?? At 8am if I saw that I’d be freaking out like my house is a mess, I m not even dressed…. Oh man. Lol
Settled for Infamy 2 years ago
Better call me an ambulance before you send that message. My heart WILL stop
A Really Bored Panda 2 years ago
I also first thought its oh my word, but I believe it actually stands for on my way
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#97
CrunChewy McSandybutt 2 years ago
I once created a Sim that looked like an ex, locked him in a room full of wicker furniture, and had him start the fireplace.
#98
green penguin (she/they) <333 2 years ago
as a dog person i apologize and refuse to associate myself with them
PowellSkier 2 years ago
You're depriving yourself of one of the greatest pleasures in life.
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Douglas Gilanyi 2 years ago
Is it ok to say, "I like dogs, but under no circumstances do I want one around all the time or to be responsible for it"?
#99
Ross “Sarcastic Dad” 2 years ago
It does, but in the same way that poppy seeds make you test positive for opiates.
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Tess 2 years ago
Staring blankly at an empty spreadsheet is how most people spend their time when they have to work with Excel
Load More Replies... #100
Auntriarch 2 years ago
If the two ladies with whippets come to the pub without said whippets, they know there will have to be an explanation
#101
Abby Palmer 2 years ago
That just how it works, literally everything is work (or school in my case)
Alexej Dvorak 2 years ago
That's because home, the outside world and work are on three different limbuses and you have to travel them all.
#102
Tabby_Sohee 2 years ago
ChatGPT sweating rn. “I’m sorry, but as an AI language model, I cannot produce sentient opinions. Please refrain from hydrating the hardware.”
Billy Harrelson 2 years ago
You know they tried to unplug Skynet but by then the order to launch had already been sent, right?
Isaac Harvey 2 years ago
Don't give them any ideas. They'll find a way to waterproof themselves.
#103
Thom Serveaux 2 years ago
nah just drive the car eight feet forward without closing the door to try the next pump.
frederick clause 2 years ago
I never see the cashier because I don't want to spend half an hour behind people buying lottery tickets.
Cheryl Ramsay 2 years ago
This happened to me. Wouldn't take credit cards. I tried the next pump and it said the same thing. I left and got gas elsewhere.
#104
Turd Ferguson 2 years ago
My personal favorite is when Woody is mad and the other toys are all "What's with him?" And I think it's Mr. Potato Head who says "laser envy" 😂
#105
Cara 2 years ago
Great idea, unless you have a habit of dropping your drink whilst in bed. Maybe I’ll buy a sippy cup…
Lakota Wolf 2 years ago
My problem is a cat who makes a beeline for my bed when she’s got a hairball to hork XD cat gastric juices soak alllll the way down XD
Load More Replies... CHRIS DOMRES 2 years ago
You still have to remove the blanket and top sheet. What is the big deal about one more? Sweat would go through to that second bottom fitted sheet. It would also need to be washed.
Blondie23 2 years ago
this doesn't work if you are a woman going through menopause... the sweat will just soak through. Yep, gross, yep part of life!
Kathryn Baylis 2 years ago (edited)
Sweat can also soak through to the mattress and into it. So can other, um, fluids.
Paulsible deniability 2 years ago
Um, there are many ways various liquids can affect multiple layers of sheets (if you're doing it right).
Michael Parsons 2 years ago
So you think your sweat stops at one sheet? That's why you have a mattress pad. Because it doesn't.
#106
I'M A SHOUTY MAN (they/he/she) 2 years ago
Not quite powdery enough for flour or anything too fine, maybe salt or sugar? Seems a bit more granular
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Spencer's slave 2 years ago (edited)
Because cats are smarter than toddlers and mine has thumbs.
Load More Replies... #107
Marie Dahme 2 years ago
You deserve the new puppy chow chocolate blizzard from Dairy Queen. !!!
#108
Betsy Ray 2 years ago (edited)
Wow! That is so cool. Female orange cats are unusual. The female version is a tortoise color.
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Rinso the Red 2 years ago
I can dig it, but I would literally die. Even on allergy meds that I take every day.
Spencer's slave 2 years ago
Spencer is currently under a fleece, on a fleece, on the sofa next to the log burner.
#109
Markus Holstein 2 years ago
Dude, you're not supposed to eat the tubes! They're just packaging!
Load More Replies... VonBlade 2 years ago
As you can see from the packaging, it only actually contains three cans. So you can get the same effect by buying three regular ones.
Lily bloom 2 years ago
That is better because how would you reach the chips towards the bottom if it was just one big can?
Load More Replies... David 2 years ago
Me, wondering if you can find the right sized ball to make tennis ball canons.
Tess 2 years ago
You're a genius. I may need to put in a request for my sister to find them and send one over...
Load More Replies... Clearly sunny 2 years ago
I don't like Pringles, they're like mashed potato spread out and baked.
#110
liyanee 2 years ago
They would never show up to your funeral in person, but they will send a mail and complain about your absence.
RabidChild 2 years ago
Probably text your next of kin to see if they'll cover your shift.
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Seán Hannan 2 years ago
Viva La Dirt League's Rowan attended Adam's funeral and revived him because he hadn't booked the time off.
Michael Largey 2 years ago
I have left instructions that my last boss is banned from my funeral.
#111
Alethea Fletcher 2 years ago
Just showed this to my husband saying "this is so YOU!". He is now looking for said 'stolen' charger to do exactly that 🤣
#112
Brenda 2 years ago
Why is a mortgage payment less than rent, yet they say you can't afford a house? Uh, then why is the monthly payment cheaper?
User# 6 2 years ago
Because 1: when for whatever eason you can no longer afford rent, it's easier/cheaper to kick you out; and 2: mortgage is just part of the cost of a house. Maintenance gets really expensive, really quickly.
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XanthippeⓐWulf🇨🇦️️🇬🇧 2 years ago
That's a bit over simplified. Generally with a mortgage, you're going to put up a significant down-payment. Yes, some landlords make you put up a large security, but it's typically not as much as a down-payment on a home. Yes, you can buy a home with a small/no down-payment, but then your mortgage isn't going to be "cheaper than rent." That's how a lot of people get themselves in trouble. They think it's going to be like renting until they get hit with mortgage, taxes, HOA (of you have one), you're responsible for all maintenance (heating/air, the roof, leaks, appliances, I could go on endlessly). Sure, they're not things you'll have to pay every month, but when things go wrong, they're never cheap I get the argument that rent has been getting out of control but honestly buying a home can be more of a financial burden than you ever imagined, especially if you're already struggling to just pay rent.
Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
Actually, you didn't, because you only considered purchase price and didn't factor in mortgage interest (which is amortized), property taxes, homeowner's insurance, maintenance, repairs, and everything else. My house cost $100k in 1997, and I haven't paid it off yet. Meanwhile, it needs a new roof, new siding, foundation sealing, updated HVAC, kitchen renovation, bathroom renovation...
Just Another Girl 2 years ago
Please contact Consumer Financial Protection Bureau to complain about Federal Regulations that set strict debt to income ratios to qualify for homeownership.
Jason Doakes 2 years ago
Actually not so easy. Mortgage rates at historic lows. You might have fixed it for 10 years, but what happens in 10 years when you have to renegotiate? What happens when the rates increase from 2% to 10%? Will you still be able to afford the monthly installment? Because that's one of the problems. The other problem is the US credit rating is anti-diluvian and discriminatory. Oh you don't understand what I'm talking about? Well... maybe you shouldn't buy a house then...
Sue User 2 years ago
Antediuvian. Nean before the flood, as in the bible. Meant here to mean " really old and outdated". I thougt it may be a typo ( i am really bad at that ), but the hyphen sealed it.
Load More Replies... CHRIS DOMRES 2 years ago
If your rent is more than what a mortgage payment would be, then borrow the down payment from your parents if you can. You can then save up and pay them back.
Ace 2 years ago
It might make more sense if you could subtract 18 from 40 and get an answer other than 12.
Dirk Daring 2 years ago
She'll be 40 in 10 years. So today she is 30. 30 minus 18 is 12. tada
Load More Replies... #113
cadena kuhn 2 years ago
This happened to me one time when I fell down a flight of stairs. I was mid conversation with my friend and when she got home I was just getting back from the hospital. She was like I thought we just got cut off wth happened
Ansi 2 years ago (edited)
I once was on my bike with my Nokia in the jacket pocket. It fell out on the asphalt breaking in 3 pieces. I picked it up, put it togheter and used it for years after that. Nokia was for sure something else... 😲
Load More Replies... I'M A SHOUTY MAN (they/he/she) 2 years ago
hahaha living that era right now, I have an old school nokia (it's so cheap, it cost me about $120, and a years worth of unlimited national calls and texts was about $140), and it works great. Long battery life, has some games, it's just great.
Huddo's sister 2 years ago
I usually had the problem of it not opening easily when I needed to change my sim etc
#114
René Sauer 2 years ago
They quit? usually they double down and order you to do it.
Load More Replies... Isaac Harvey 2 years ago
Minimum wage has devolved from the minimum required to lead a happy life to the minimum required to not die of natural causes.
UpQuarkDownQuark 2 years ago
Be really good at the things in your job description, but be sure to screw anything else they throw your way.
#115
Marie Dahme 2 years ago
Oh damn girl…I got shoes older than you…still got my platform Mary janes from the 90’s. Just waiting for them to come back in style ! Lol
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Audra Sisler 2 years ago
I was born in 1987!!! I'm so old😭😭well....I'm 35 but I feel so old!!! LOL
#116
Huddo's sister 2 years ago
I always use my 5ft height as a guide for estimating other things. I guess now I have to break it down into subways.
Marie Dahme 2 years ago
Wow. Does this mean as I’m only 5ft tall, that my length is like 5 subways !??
#117
#118
Robert D 2 years ago
Heard there are r rated andnc17 rated versions of the movie, hysterical of course, from his improv.
Load More Replies... Mike Fitzpatrick 2 years ago
Watch some of the old Rocky and Bullwinkle cartoons. Absolutely filled with adult type puns.
#119
Donkey boi 2 years ago
Next time I hear it, I'm gonna start crying and tell them I'm an orphan.
#120
#121
Marie Dahme 2 years ago
You shake the bag of cat treats and make them come to you !!! Easy peasy.
Philly Bobcat 2 years ago
Sit down between them and wait for them to come to you. They'll find your skeleton on the floor years later.
#122
Brenda 2 years ago
Mine moved back to my state, and bought a house with an upstairs hubby, youngest, roommate and I could live in. All so I could pay off medical bills from cancer. Just as we're almost done, hubby has a heart attack, then 10 months later a stroke. They've paid our bills for 8 months while waiting for retirement to kick in and never once complained. I hope I'm that good a parent !
Mouse 2 years ago
I read that 4 times trying to figure out where they bought an upstairs hubby.
Load More Replies... Huddo's sister 2 years ago
I am actually scared of when mum dies and I don't have that support anymore!
Carla Phillips 2 years ago
Mine took something I told her in confidence, told my sister even though I expressly begged her not to, then acted surprised when my sister used the information against me. You'd think I'd learn by now
#123
#124
UpQuarkDownQuark 2 years ago
I’ll normalize being annoyed by someone who uses that many exclamation marks.
#125
Michael Largey 2 years ago
So, "dodging a bullet" is supposed to disappear from the English language?
#126
troufaki13 2 years ago
My toxic trait is that I think he will fall madly in love with me the moment he sees me! 🤩
Isaac Harvey 2 years ago
Bad plots are the producers' and scriptwriters' responsibilities, not the actors'.
#127
#128
Lakota Wolf 2 years ago
I remember that, for the first 10 years of our relationship, I drove a hoopty jalopy of a Volkswagen Eurovan that STILL had more cylinders than my boyfriend’s Toyota Camry. XD I still have that van! …and the boyfriend, lol
HeavyMetalHeart 2 years ago
Oh, this is about cars? Thank you, I was totally lost!
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#129
SparkDragon 2 years ago
Just sneak into her room at night and put it on her nightstand, 'watching' her.
Ty Stratton-Quirk 2 years ago
Start moving it around when she's at school and, when she asks what's happening, claim that you have no idea what she's talking about. She'll get rid of it herself.
#130
Huddo's sister 2 years ago
I always find it funny when preschoolers add random nouns to names etc, but I can't laugh out loud because either I will offend them or the other kids will beginning trying to one-up them and it becomes chaos
Alexej Dvorak 2 years ago (edited)
I read that as "our preschooler" the first three or four times and got really irritated by the use of "its".
#131
MooMooFutch 2 years ago
This is so true. It needs to be higher on the list so more people can see this.
#132
Felicia Baxter 2 months ago
I don't remember my bio father, but i'm told he was useless, wouldn't help with chores, didn't even know how to cook, and was just generally a free-loading a**hole, his brother is pretty ok though, he got his act together and takes care of his daughter, and also helped my mom whenever he could while she was pregnant with me
Lene 2 years ago
I am sorta confused by this one. My parents divorced when I was little and they are OK with eachother but not really talking unless I invited them to the same event. My parents are both married to other people now. My mom and her husband have always had a, imo, toxic relationship and I can see how my mom expects my relationship with my bf to be as toxic. My dad is married to a woman who is, imo, toxic and the exact opposite of my dad. I have never liked his wife and it seems she never liked me. But we try to tolerate eachother. It's funny because I think that what she doesn't like about me are pretty much all the traits that I share with my dad. Perhaps she doesn't really like my dad? Well, all in all: the relationships my parents had/have are all not showing in my relationship, I think. With all the flaws my relationship with my bf has... it's way more harmonic than all my parents ever seem to've had.
Tess 2 years ago
What the hell am I supposed to do with this? My parents have been divorced since 1997. Mum has admitted that it was the biggest mistake of her life when she broke up their marriage for my little sister's dad. My dad hasn't even been on a date since then. Not a week has gone by where they haven't at least called each other. Within the past few years they even had a discussion about whether they should get back together. They decided against it only because dad purchased a hundred acres in the bush, 3½ hours away from civilization.
Sarel Seerower 2 years ago
Learn from it. It didn't say you had to emulate it. My parents had a horrid marriage and I have a wonderful one.
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Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
So just like every generation has done to slang since the dawn of time? Wicked cool.
#134
Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
Funny thing, but you know that paragraph of text that's always under the name of the dish? That's actually what we call a "description" of the dish and its ingredients and preparation. Life hack.
#135
Brenda 2 years ago
Cause iPhone sux! Nothing but trouble with the one youngest had. Replaced 3x the first year, 2x the next year. Then, even with insurance, they refused to replace or fix. Said we had to buy a new phone. We did, but it wasn't an iPhone!
Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
One experience is not a statistical universe, though. I had an iPhone 4s for nearly 10 years without a speck of trouble, then bought a refurbished 6s which I've had ever since (and I still use the 4s as an iPod). Nor would I say that Androids suck, only that I dislike their operating system and setup.
Load More Replies... Fish Fingers 2 years ago
Except iPhone owners who refuse to accept that iPhone isn't actually very good...
Michael Parsons 2 years ago
If I could remove one issue from the public discourse, it would be phones. If you care what kind of phone someone has, I hope you step on every piece of chewed gum anyone drops.
CrunChewy McSandybutt 2 years ago
I'm not paying $1k for a GD phone that does practically the same sh*t my Samsung does. I don't care if it has an awesome camera. I'd rather spend $1k on a camera.
Ria C. 2 years ago
My friend has the newest android because he lost his other one. His pics are 100% better than his wife's latest iphone.
Load More Replies... CHRIS DOMRES 2 years ago
I liked Apple when it was the underdog computer company struggling to survive against the bad ol Microsoft/Windows corporate monster. Now Apple is the bad ol corporate monster.
Justin Trouble 2 years ago
I remember apple was crying about Microsoft having a monopoly because most computers came with windows, because it was more useful and easier for people to use. Then apple did nothing to improve their software and just started jacking up the prices for their garbage to make it feel exclusive.
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Jill Rhodry 2 years ago
Yep, that's me - my team at work have been having a go at me for not having an iPhone, told them I'd buy an iPhone when they can show me the benefit of having one over the android I pay a third of the price for - that was four years ago and I have a Xiaomi.
#136
Caligo(he/they) 2 years ago
I feel like this entry is in a foreign language XD source: am aged 14
Load More Replies... Tiffany Wilson 2 years ago
I see this a lot with fan accounts on IG. It's incredibly annoying.
#138
#139
XanthippeⓐWulf🇨🇦️️🇬🇧 2 years ago
Lol, yes it can happen. ASD here, so I can relate. I had to learn to be aware that I would get "loud" when I was passionate or felt strongly about something. It's not intentional and I definitely appreciate when people are understanding.
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Chenga Animates 1 year ago
I do this. I have trouble modulating my voice (I'm better now) so it's not uncommon for me to accidentally yell at somebody because I'm excited or smthn
Book Nerd (she/her) 2 years ago
I honestly don’t know, it’s so confusing. I just switch between the two. I hate English
Load More Replies... #140
Lene 2 years ago (edited)
I once decided to go on a shopping spree. I had saved up 1000 Danish kroner and I thought I'd go and buy a load of new clothes and books and a lot of fun stuff for my pen pal letters and my bullet journal and..... after an whole day at the mall I ended up with 2 pens and a bottle of water. I am sh1t at shopping. But what I do buy I really enjoy! Those pens were awesome and it was hot outside so the water was super nice to have for the trip home. 😁 (and the 980kroner I had left went to the piggy bank)
Load More Replies... #141
Upstaged75 2 years ago
Used for counting/math in elementary (primary) school.
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Marie Dahme 2 years ago
Wait ! I didn’t get to have these back in the 70’s ! Y’all got cool stuff to play with growing up…we had the old fisher price toys that sell on eBay for hundreds of dollars now lol. Anyone remember the radio that you turned the big k**b and it played the tune “Raindrops keep falling on my Head” ? Or the Fisher Price barn with all the animals and when you opened the barn door it went …mooooo ! Lol
le_smol_froge 2 years ago
I HAD THESE AND IM ONLY 14 BUT I REMEMBER I GOT AN AWARD THINGY FOR BEING GOOD AT COUNTING THEM
HelluvaHedgehogAlien 2 years ago
OH MY GOD I HAD THESE BACK WHEN THE EARTH WAS STILL A PRIMORDIAL TUB OF NOTHINGNESS
Le_Whatever(she/her)🇺🇦️ 2 years ago
I used these... I would always think that they were gummies and then have to remind myself "oh wait they're plastic"
Huddo's sister 2 years ago
We didn't use them when I was in school, but we did when I was doing my teacher training.
#142
UpQuarkDownQuark 2 years ago
Got my only two the day before my 39th birthday. Most of my regrets are because I didn’t do or try something, so I thought, “Let’s try something I might regret!” I don’t wouldn’t get them now, but I also don’t mind having them. Actually, I often forget about them until someone says, “I like your tattoos.” Then I usually glance at my arms like, “Oh yeah! Those things!”
Michael Largey 2 years ago
One of the purposes of a tattoo is to remind you to think out long term decisions very thoroughly.
#143
Justin Trouble 2 years ago
Your ears are fine that's just the planned obsolescence lovingly built into every product apple sells so you have to buy more of their garbage.
Li’l E. 2 years ago
Apple actually lowered the max volume to protect people’s hearing, but tbh I hate it.
MooMooFutch 2 years ago
There is a setting you can turn off so it goes higher.
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#145
Isaac Harvey 2 years ago
We don't need to publicize what we've achieved to feel good about it.
#146
Bumblebee 2 years ago
Evil stepsister got a redemption arc, fell in love and also got a happy ending
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Jonathan Drew 2 years ago
Yeah it was. I was really surprised how this one came out. Really enjoyable. And it shows that even unattractive girls can find love. So there is hope for me yet! Ariel's New Beginning was wonderful in the same way. More of these and less of do-overs, please DISNEY!!!
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I'M A SHOUTY MAN (they/he/she) 2 years ago
Well this wasn't Tumblr, like what, 5% was? Nevertheless entertaining I guess.
VioletHunter 2 years ago
Those are screenshots from Twitter posted on Tumblr. But it gets even better. Boredpanda copied them from a Facebook group called "The worst of Tumblr".
Load More Replies... Carole 2 years ago (edited)
I clicked on this hoping to see some tumblr shenanigans (which I miss) but turns out this is mostly about Twitter :(
Jerusalem Cat Syndrome 2 years ago
Calling for a proofreader: If you were pretty online between 2013 and 2018, first of all, I’m sorry, second of all, you are most likely familiar with the somewhat hard-to-define sire called Tumblr. Really, guys, the very first sentence?!
Arran Walker 2 years ago
This post makes me so angry. It's mostly Twitter and other platforms. Hardly anything from Tumblr. How lazy can you get? If these images are from that Fb group, that group should change their name. BP needs to do a better job about topics to write about. Don't choose some Fb group and then show content that has nothing to do with the topic.
I'M A SHOUTY MAN (they/he/she) 2 years ago
Well this wasn't Tumblr, like what, 5% was? Nevertheless entertaining I guess.
VioletHunter 2 years ago
Those are screenshots from Twitter posted on Tumblr. But it gets even better. Boredpanda copied them from a Facebook group called "The worst of Tumblr".
Load More Replies... Carole 2 years ago (edited)
I clicked on this hoping to see some tumblr shenanigans (which I miss) but turns out this is mostly about Twitter :(
Jerusalem Cat Syndrome 2 years ago
Calling for a proofreader: If you were pretty online between 2013 and 2018, first of all, I’m sorry, second of all, you are most likely familiar with the somewhat hard-to-define sire called Tumblr. Really, guys, the very first sentence?!
Arran Walker 2 years ago
This post makes me so angry. It's mostly Twitter and other platforms. Hardly anything from Tumblr. How lazy can you get? If these images are from that Fb group, that group should change their name. BP needs to do a better job about topics to write about. Don't choose some Fb group and then show content that has nothing to do with the topic.
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