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It takes a 10-sec glimpse at the LinkedIn page to realize how productive, successful, and virtually unstoppable the people on there are. They did it all—got major investment, took their company profits through the roof, made sure their employees feel like literally the most loved people on this planet, raised six kids, went bankrupt, and started life all over again.
But there’s something suspiciously woke and hyper-inspirational going on on this platform, and the Twitter page “The State of LinkedIn” is dedicated to exposing the not-so-pretty side of these posts.
“LinkedIn is a breeding ground for lies & brown-nosing. Exposing the worst. We are in no way associated with LinkedIn, so class us as a parody,” states their description and 174.4K followers couldn't agree more. So let’s see some of the screenshots right below!
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To find out more about The State Of LinkedIn, Bored Panda reached out to its creator @Brooke_Smedley, who, along with the co-creator @HarryBarnes1, has been working on the project roughly for three years now. “The State Of LinkedIn originally came as a spin-off from one of our other pages, @_DHOTYA, where we found the submissions surrounding LinkedIn-based scenarios.”
The authors then came up with the idea of creating its own page, then it took off from there. “The page is roughly about 2-3 years old and has always had a slow and gradual increase, we’ve never really had a massive influx of followers at once,” Brooke_Smedley said and added: “it seems a lot of people share a common interest in the strange posts that you can come across on LinkedIn.”
#5
Two_rolling_black_eyes 4 years ago
As a job hunter, it actually helps. Haven't heard back from company x in 2'weeks and their HR suddenly checks your profile - need to follow up today with person who viewed.
When asked what they think of the LinkedIn culture, Brooke said that “I don’t use LinkedIn, mainly because within my job I don’t really have a need to. However, I can understand how it can be important for some people within their working environments.”
#7
Douglas Turner 4 years ago
Hey, I met that guy! I think he's still talking about himself. Or to himself. Something like that...
“I think it’s changed from what it was originally designed to do and has turned more into an attempt of a business Facebook where people are more interested in likes and engagements as opposed to what it was created for,” the creator of The State Of LinkedIn explained.
“People seem to get a handful of likes and comments and realize they’ll attract more engagement by following that approach,” Brooke concluded. The Twitter creator duo also runs a few more super popular Twitter pages like @StateOfSelling, @_StateOfFB, @_StateOfTweets and @_DHOTYA (“Didn’t Happen of the Year Awards”.)
#10
I want cake 4 years ago
You what? So this prick assumes that his interns should be poor, and punishes them for not being poor? How the f*** does a boss have anything to say about an employee's personal belongings anyway? It's insane how many people confuse wealth with personal worth.
#11
#12
Jan Jansen 4 years ago (edited)
With a heart heavy as a stone he sat behind his mahogany desk engulfed in the warm yellowish light of his turn-of-the-century banker's lamps, while he read yet another publisher's e-mail rejecting his manuscript. Apparently his style of writing was deemed to be 'archaic' and 'over the top'.
#13
#19
Anna Banana 4 years ago
I was thinking that, it seems like all he does (despite the packed schedule) is answer messages and plan things.
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Lindsey Turner 4 years ago
Thank god he has no breakfast, lunch or dinner booked in, he has no time to pee!
Nat Hedley 4 years ago
Beat me to it. 'Pencilled in for 3 weeks' time: starve to death.'
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WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
I see a distinct gap of 15 minutes between 145 pm and 2pm. This guy is a slacker.
Anna Banana 4 years ago
I assume that's when he takes the drugs which allow him to function on 5 hours of sleep
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troufaki13 4 years ago (edited)
Zero quality of life... so sad... But then again everyone makes their own choices..
Anna McHugh 4 years ago
I'm seriously embarrassed that this piece of wank-assery is clearly Scottish. We are not like that. We define ourselves as not like that by asking first if you know "Ross" and then saying 'we are not like Ross.'
I want cake 4 years ago
Ooh yeah because you're going to be so sharp and make great decisions on 5 hours of sleep.
Nannychachi 4 years ago
When did he ever have the time to compile and post this list? Poor overworked little man.
Gary Mohammed 4 years ago
How can anyone think that working from 6am to midnight is a sign of success? This is self induced slavery and he's too thick to realize it.
Randy Klefbeck 4 years ago
0000-0100: call cocaine dealer for more product so I can avoid eating altogether.
Thomas Turnbull 4 years ago
This man will have a heart attack early in life and realise he has wasted his personal life. What a sad man.
Ashley Wright 4 years ago
Ross is trying to show the world he’s the Commander of his ship! #tryhard
Efi Karafotia 4 years ago
Nobody posts their entire day schedule (no time, among other reasons). I feel like this was (hopefully) his only full day and he needed to tell the world how busy he got.
Maddie Star ⭐ 4 years ago
Also manages to teleport between appointments/ meetings. perhaps sell that tec and you wont have to bother with the rest of your bull s**t day.
Deidre Benton 4 years ago
So he works "hard" by sitting in meetings all day so he can plan out the work everyone else is going to do. Awesome...
Demi Zwaan 4 years ago
So 15 minute lunch, no dinner. Catching up on messages after everyone else has gone home, so completely unproductive. Being proud of working 19 hours a day and sleeping (max) 5 hours a day. Well, it's his choice, but I don't envy him.
Marcellus the Third 4 years ago
I'm guessing his secretary just left his toxic office and he couldn't work the agenda app, so he's repurposing LinkedIn?
Ryan Deschanel 4 years ago
Yeah, we get it, you are more productive and busy than we lazy parasites...
2WheelTravlr 4 years ago
So basically what Ross is saying is the only humans who are willing to have contact with him are paid to do so.
#21
I want cake 4 years ago
Really, nunchucks? What kind B-grade movies has this guy been watching to think that any biker-looking guy will 'go berserk' in a random place because someone on the phone told him to?
#22
I want cake 4 years ago
They're not meetings, they're classes, you self-important beetle. And he's probably heard his parent say that on a daily basis so he trotted it out to impress them.
#31
Aaleyah _ aesthetic 4 years ago
WELCOME BACK TO MARKETING 101!! TODAY WE HAVE A SPECIAL GUEST... DAVID KELLY!!! KNOWN FOR PENETRATING HIS CLIENTS!!!!!
#34
#36
2WheelTravlr 4 years ago
Yeah, I'd be "lost for words" if I had that mess emailed to me from an Exam Board member.
#37
Demi Zwaan 4 years ago
Well, it's not 24, but it is WAY too much. There is absolutely no reason for so many screens, it does not help production at all. Unless you're a mall security guard, obviously.
#40
2WheelTravlr 4 years ago
Yes, if you're in Sales and Management, pay attention to the fact that this supposed "professional" is apparently unable to hold even a debit card and can't comprehend that the reason the manager gave him the drinks for free is because the only other option was throwing them out.
#44
Oskar vanZandt 4 years ago
Another workaholic who will most likely not have a pension to enjoy as he keels over from a heart attack in his late forties.
#45
Oskar vanZandt 4 years ago
Yeah, they look like gang members to me... especially that guy on the left wearing a pink button down under a pullover... S.U.S.P.I.C.I.O.U.S!
#46
Nat Hedley 4 years ago
This guy's day might be more productive if he wasn't apparently taking 30 minutes to make a coffee then another 30 minutes to drink it.
#47
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago
What do you mean “Not quite the weather to be washing a car (bright sunshine!)”? So Stupid only washes his car in the pouring rain?
#49
I want cake 4 years ago
People with money seem to love making people without break down in public.
#50
#53
#54
s. vitkovitsky 4 years ago
Here's another thought! Let's have it in the last car, and let's disconnect it from the rest of the train!
#58
s. vitkovitsky 4 years ago
For sure this happened, and the unicorn flying by at the time will verify it.
#60
I want cake 4 years ago
Hmm yeah because the watchmaker has no idea what he's looking at, what with his complete lack of knowledge of his craft.
#64
I want cake 4 years ago
'Mr emotional intelligence' sees no problem making fun of a waitress who's trying to keep both him and her boss happy. Pat yourself on the back, mate.
#65
s. vitkovitsky 4 years ago
So stop admiring your imaginary trophies, and get out before the imaginary fire burns down your place.
#66
Oskar vanZandt 4 years ago
Is the guy wearing personalised dog tags in case he gets lost and needs to be escorted back to the institution?
#68
Batwench 4 years ago
I have just checked and it is about approx 130 miles between the two and the car journey takes about 2.5 hours. This is still faster than doing a plane journey or depending on the train, the train journey time. So he may have a point. Especially if someone else is driving you in a fancy car.
#70
Anna McHugh 4 years ago
If my death was used as part of a cold pitch on LinkedIn, I'd be extremely unhappy. TF I'm an atheist and don't believe in any kind of afterlife.
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What do you think ?
I want cake 4 years ago
Most of these read like people with low confidence desperately trying to convince themselves that they're doing well, fishing for external validation.
Load More Replies... Ryan Deschanel 4 years ago
LinkedIn : the site where pretentious jerks use manager bullshit to humblebrag.
Hugo Raible 4 years ago
For an IT guy, LinkedIn is like a reverse dating site. Pretty girls write to you and you ignore them.
Brendan 4 years ago
I just wrote my 'Year Review' at work, in which we have to write about our achievements over the past 12 months. And I've now realised I sound like one of these LinkedIn wankers. I just hope my reviewer is also a wanker.
Will Lanni 4 years ago
Yeah, but in the annual review you're supposed to toot your own horn--unless you're fortunate to have a manager who fights for you. Only managers/directors above you making decisions about a pay raise will see it. In LinkedIn's case... the world sees it. Go easy on yourself, friend, and brag when it's the right--and expected--thing to do.
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Milan 4 years ago
LinkedIn, the place where Charwoman can be Cleaning and Facilities Manager (full respect for charwomen) :D
King Joffrey 4 years ago
'Charwoman' - mate, it's a cleaner. The word 'charwoman' is straight out of Dickens and quite offensive these days. Fair enough if your first language isn't English in which case I would unlearn this word.
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Rose the Cook 4 years ago
For unknown reasons one teacher forum put the names of everyone who had ever commented there on Linkedin along with phoney CVs including their email details. This was when Linkedin was just starting up so maybe it was to look busy but few if any of the people's names were their real ones although the email addresses were the real ones they had given when joining the forum. Many of us are still getting messages from Linkedin despite never having consented to be part of it.
Dorothy Parker 4 years ago
They also get permission to access their members' email address list. I received many "invitations" from friends to join LinkedIn that my friends never sent.
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WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
So LinkedIn is basically for people who are too stupid to post cringe videos on TikTok.
Dorothy Cloud 4 years ago
I read 3 or 4 and quit. I have no idea what it was all about & it wasn't very interesting.
Laura Odelius 4 years ago
British LinkedIn seems worse than US LinkedIn. Or maybe I’m just pickier about connecting with people?
Oskar vanZandt 4 years ago
Lots of pathetic blowhards in this thread... I skimmed over the majority of posts.
I want cake 4 years ago
Most of these read like people with low confidence desperately trying to convince themselves that they're doing well, fishing for external validation.
Load More Replies... Ryan Deschanel 4 years ago
LinkedIn : the site where pretentious jerks use manager bullshit to humblebrag.
Hugo Raible 4 years ago
For an IT guy, LinkedIn is like a reverse dating site. Pretty girls write to you and you ignore them.
Brendan 4 years ago
I just wrote my 'Year Review' at work, in which we have to write about our achievements over the past 12 months. And I've now realised I sound like one of these LinkedIn wankers. I just hope my reviewer is also a wanker.
Will Lanni 4 years ago
Yeah, but in the annual review you're supposed to toot your own horn--unless you're fortunate to have a manager who fights for you. Only managers/directors above you making decisions about a pay raise will see it. In LinkedIn's case... the world sees it. Go easy on yourself, friend, and brag when it's the right--and expected--thing to do.
Load More Replies... Milan 4 years ago
LinkedIn, the place where Charwoman can be Cleaning and Facilities Manager (full respect for charwomen) :D
King Joffrey 4 years ago
'Charwoman' - mate, it's a cleaner. The word 'charwoman' is straight out of Dickens and quite offensive these days. Fair enough if your first language isn't English in which case I would unlearn this word.
Load More Replies... Rose the Cook 4 years ago
For unknown reasons one teacher forum put the names of everyone who had ever commented there on Linkedin along with phoney CVs including their email details. This was when Linkedin was just starting up so maybe it was to look busy but few if any of the people's names were their real ones although the email addresses were the real ones they had given when joining the forum. Many of us are still getting messages from Linkedin despite never having consented to be part of it.
Dorothy Parker 4 years ago
They also get permission to access their members' email address list. I received many "invitations" from friends to join LinkedIn that my friends never sent.
Load More Replies... WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
So LinkedIn is basically for people who are too stupid to post cringe videos on TikTok.
Dorothy Cloud 4 years ago
I read 3 or 4 and quit. I have no idea what it was all about & it wasn't very interesting.
Laura Odelius 4 years ago
British LinkedIn seems worse than US LinkedIn. Or maybe I’m just pickier about connecting with people?
Oskar vanZandt 4 years ago
Lots of pathetic blowhards in this thread... I skimmed over the majority of posts.
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