30 Hilarious Tweets By Single People That Will Make You Laugh Then Cry
Valentine’s Day is nearly here! For many of us this means joy and romance, but for others it is simply a reminder of how lonely and undesirable they are. And of course there are plenty of people who think that the whole thing is a fake, materialistic day for gullible people who can’t think for themselves and need cues on how and when to act.
What we have here are cynical, single people who know it, own it and deal with it in the best possible way, with humor! We here at Bored Panda have put together a list of the darkest and most hilariously self-deprecating tweets about being single that we could find. Because why should single life be a drag? So if you are single this Valentine’s Day, and do feel a little low about it, check out the list below and have a chuckle, coz you’re certainly not alone!
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When you and your equally single bestfriend start hating the same person
I swear I'm not lying but Sunday I had this exact scenario in a restaurant, would you be my valentine Angela ?
I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon.
It was only when I stopped trying to date (personals, matchmakers) and learned to be comfortable and happy by myself that I met someone I've been happily married to for over 20 years. Singles, find things that you can do by yourself that will make you happy. Don't depend on someone else to 'make you happy'.
#19 stole this from Eddie Izzard's "Dressed to Kill" gig.
I'm still single even as I'm typing this. Thing is, I'm aromantic-asexual; I'd honestly prefer it this way. To me, Valentine's day is just an excuse to wait one more day for discount chocolate. "Fuck romance, I'm just here for the chocolate!"
Lotsa very witty folks here!
Oh these will be perfect for my "anti Valentines Day" tomorrow. That & YouTube videos about narcissistic asshole that ruined so many special days! Did I mention a few glasses of bubbly & puffs from bong?! Gr8 hump day with me, myself & kitty!
At some point in life (like after 30...) you realize that men are like toilets. Either occupied or full of sh*t. ;(
feel a bit offended :).. and then, there maybe are some too much like u?
"Why are you still single?" "Why? Would you go out with me" "No, but-" "See? That's exactly what EVERYONE says..."
I feel like such a bad person when I see this. I want to be single yet everyone tries to ask me out. Seriously follow me around if you wanna date, I will give you on the next fella to ask me out, free of charge.
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Single people are mad...............
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Any girl under 30 can have her pick of men, even if she's remotely attractive. If you're single ladies it's because of your requirements. I venture to guess they get asked out constantly, but choose to turn down dates. He's not tall, rich, handsome enough, doesn't have the right job, etc, etc. Over 30 = "hit the wall." Enjoy the cats.
Or maybe he is an entitled creep. Like you.
Clay, that's not entirely true. Not everyone goes for looks, height, and money. If a man has a good heart, and has a great sense of humour, he's a winner. It's good to be picky. If we're not, we'd settle for just anyone, and be in a boring relationship. Also, some of us are single, because we are too busy to date. I'm in theater at the moment, and we rehearse every weekend, and will be doing 3 day rehearsals. Also, with a full time job, music, and a touring play, there's absolutely no time to date.
I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon.
It was only when I stopped trying to date (personals, matchmakers) and learned to be comfortable and happy by myself that I met someone I've been happily married to for over 20 years. Singles, find things that you can do by yourself that will make you happy. Don't depend on someone else to 'make you happy'.
#19 stole this from Eddie Izzard's "Dressed to Kill" gig.
I'm still single even as I'm typing this. Thing is, I'm aromantic-asexual; I'd honestly prefer it this way. To me, Valentine's day is just an excuse to wait one more day for discount chocolate. "Fuck romance, I'm just here for the chocolate!"
Lotsa very witty folks here!
Oh these will be perfect for my "anti Valentines Day" tomorrow. That & YouTube videos about narcissistic asshole that ruined so many special days! Did I mention a few glasses of bubbly & puffs from bong?! Gr8 hump day with me, myself & kitty!
At some point in life (like after 30...) you realize that men are like toilets. Either occupied or full of sh*t. ;(
feel a bit offended :).. and then, there maybe are some too much like u?
"Why are you still single?" "Why? Would you go out with me" "No, but-" "See? That's exactly what EVERYONE says..."
I feel like such a bad person when I see this. I want to be single yet everyone tries to ask me out. Seriously follow me around if you wanna date, I will give you on the next fella to ask me out, free of charge.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Single people are mad...............
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Any girl under 30 can have her pick of men, even if she's remotely attractive. If you're single ladies it's because of your requirements. I venture to guess they get asked out constantly, but choose to turn down dates. He's not tall, rich, handsome enough, doesn't have the right job, etc, etc. Over 30 = "hit the wall." Enjoy the cats.
Or maybe he is an entitled creep. Like you.
Clay, that's not entirely true. Not everyone goes for looks, height, and money. If a man has a good heart, and has a great sense of humour, he's a winner. It's good to be picky. If we're not, we'd settle for just anyone, and be in a boring relationship. Also, some of us are single, because we are too busy to date. I'm in theater at the moment, and we rehearse every weekend, and will be doing 3 day rehearsals. Also, with a full time job, music, and a touring play, there's absolutely no time to date.