The holidays are meant to be spent with the people you care about most in the world. It’s a time for warmth, introspection, and taking a well-deserved break from the stress of leading a hectic life. Unfortunately, things rarely go as planned. And many people find that once Xmas rolls around, they’re left frustrated and drained.
The r/AskReddit community recently opened up about who ruined their Christmas celebrations and how. We’ve collected some of their most intriguing stories to share with you, Pandas. Scroll down to read about just how bad things can get and how lucky most of us are that this hasn’t happened to us.
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Ellen at my mum’s work. She went to the Christmas lunch sick, turned out she had Covid and now so does my mum and three other colleagues. Because of Ellen at least 6 high risk people have been exposed and all three family Christmases are cancelled. I’m extremely f*****g unimpressed with your work ethic Ellen.
It could be Ellen's fault or the company's fault. After the first months, when people started to "relax", many companies forced employees to go to work unless they were certified positive to COVID. Sometimes the virus took some days to show, and in the meantime people had to be at work... spreading the virus. A friend of mine had to go to work even though she started to feel sick, her husband and child had Covid, and she works in a supermarket so she is in contact with many people every day. She had COVID, too.
Load More Replies...Boss: Don't come in if you're sick. Me (3 weeks later): Hey boss I'm sick. Boss: How sick are you? We're already short handed.
In Ellen's defense, she probably had a job where you get very few sick days a year, and are expected to do your job, even while sick, and upper management that cares less about anything but results, with a zero WFH policy.
I had it just before Christmas and unfortunately I had had it for two days before I was able to test as you can no longer get free covid tests in the UK and have to buy them from pharmacy. I had to leave home to get the covid tests. I've had four covid vaccinations over the past three years.
I had it before Christmas too but was too young for the latest run of boosters (would happily have paid for it - stupid rules!) so got it quite badly. Was testing negative just before Christmas day but still had a dreadful cough and feel really run down. Had a hospital appointment yesterday (unrelated reason) and am gradually starting to feel dreadful. Must have caught another virus while there (yes, everyone was wearing masks). Yay.
Load More Replies...Here in the US, thank your government for this. A lot of people cannot afford to take time off. We have such limited sick time here. If we get sick at the end of the year, chances are we've blown through our sick time by this point. Our government doesn't care and does not subsidize it's citizens. Now banks and corporations? Yes. Citizens? No. Wars? Yes. Citizens health? Absolutely not.
Almost positive my boss just did the same to me. He was sick, swore he'd tested negative for everything, worked closely with me because it's our busiest time of the year, and then, when I tested positive on Christmas Eve, "offered" to "let" me come work anyway and "just keep it between us." No thanks, Boss!
Ive had a sore throat. Diagnosed with flu, then with laryngitis. I wore a mask I also have bad post n'asal drip. I wear masks just out of respect for other people. I don't want them to worry or think they will get sick near me. I will tell folks is just my post nasal drip, or a sore throat, and they appreciate me wearing a mask for others' concerns. WEAR THE DAMN MASK, people!
This is why I keep getting sick. People pass on their cold on to me.
OMG..my boss did this as well and i caught it. did not feel sick till the day of Christmas, already around all my family. luckily my sister and husband were the only ones who got it. found out after that boss and her husband jUsT HaD tO Go tO a BiKe RaCe!
My dad telling me (a white mom) that I better not make my daughter (black) look ghetto with corn rows. She’s 13 months old and he hasn’t held her, barely acknowledges her. Prob bc she’s black and I’m finding out more and more how racist he is. He won’t be back to my house now. He’s 89 and he can p**s off.
Good riddance to your dad. I'm sorry, I know that it has to hurt. But if he can't be receptive and loving to your daughter then he can kick rocks!
Because "looking black" is intolerable. SMH And... not my business but the ages have me wondering. Adoption? Retirement baby? If dad is 89 then in most instances his daughter would be around 60ish.
In most instances, yes. Not always though. My dad is 89 and I’m 44
Load More Replies...And to think, this 2hole time as a black woman wearing "cornrows" I was being perceived as being ghetto by some folks. Good to know. I'd let her wear them with brightly colored beads.
Yep, and the more beads the better! F**k that guy and everyone who thinks like him.
Load More Replies...I know this was a difficult and hard decision to have to make but you did the right thing. The last thing you want is for your child to grow up with inferiority Complex and eventually resenting you from not protecting her. I’m a white mom with brown children and every time someone behaved like this to anyone, my children or not, they were cut out from my children’s lives. Couldn’t risk that behavior creeping into my kids lives.
!00% Good for you! Your precious bub doesn't need that negativity in her life, and neither do you <3
I’d never heard of this before. I looked for pics online and Oh My Goodness!!! I love it!!
Load More Replies...I hate the ignorance there's absolutely nothing getting about corn rows! It's a beautiful protective hairstyle that I wish my pale behind could pull off lol. Seriously though keep him away from your daughter I'm sure it hurts but children are smart and pickup on everything she deserves to feel nothing but love!
I feel that. I love black hair. Especially natural. I love to see people confident about their hair and that confidence doesn’t come from being mistreated like so many people do with making snarky remarks about hair. Whatever style someone chooses to rock, I love to see the confidence that is best passed on by loving people that help build self esteem.
Load More Replies...That's horrible. Not only a racist, but against his own grandchild
It happens. Older people not giving a damn about the possibility they could be dead before their newborn baby graduates high school. I went to high school with more than 1 person whose parents were in their late 70s by the time we graduated at 17 or 18. It was like a game of holding your breath and hoping they could graduate before having to plan a funeral. I also went to university with someone whose parents had a new kid every 5 years and had 7 single births. She was the second to youngest as I recall. And one of her parents was dead by then. It was the first time I’d heard of a woman being able to have kids at early 50s. Back in the 96-98 time frame.
Load More Replies...Technically happened last night but my cat tripped my mother and she broke her arm on the way down. The ER had a surprisingly short wait time though. Cat is fine and he has no regrets.
I doubt she broke her arm on the way down, more likely when she landed.
Though the winter holidays can be full of joy, merriment, and happiness, for many folks, stress is an ever-present reality, too.
According to the American Psychological Association, 41% of US adults have revealed that their stress levels increase during the holiday season between November and December. 43% of respondents claim that this stress prevents them from enjoying the holidays to the fullest. Meanwhile, 36% of Americans opened up about how the holidays “feel like a competition.”
My husband by telling me at dinner that he should have been informed of all my mental health problems before we got together. He said this after I’d spent the previous three hours preparing the dinner he was eating. The irony is he’s chronically ill and hasn’t worked since 2014. Most of my current mental health issues come from being his caregiver and breadwinner.
Therapy first and then give him back to his Mommy if it doesn't work.
Load More Replies...People who are chronically ill are often not nice people. Regardless what the movies say.
Or just don't generalise like that. Just as with healthy people, there will nice and a-hole chronically ill people.
Load More Replies...I would've told him, since he felt like that, he can find someone else to provide his care and his financial help and then leave. He doesn't deserve your dedication.
I haven't experienced it, but it's my understanding that it's not uncommon for very ill people to lash out at their caregivers. I am by no stretch of the imagination excusing it, by the way.
In some conditions, like dementia, it is not uncommon, but the brain is deteriorating fast and the person experiments confusion and frustration. Literally, the brain is "disappearing", so the "personality" disappears together with their memories. This is not the case here. I have a test: does this person have the mental capacity to go alone to the supermarket to buy a bar of chocolate? Can they choose the chocolate they want, pay for it and return home? If the answer is "yes", they also have the capacity to know when they are being hurtful, selfish or entitled. Do not tolerate any s**t from them.
Load More Replies...Tell him you didn't sign up to be a CNA and his own family should be helping more.
What an ungrateful, unappreciative buttwaffle. Let that selfish turdblossom find another caregiver, preferably one he has to pay.
Gonna be lonely Christmas holidays in his future if he doesn’t get a grip.
Being a caregiver is very hard, even you have have help with the caregiving. OP, if you read this, be sure you get support for yourself, too.
Yes. Absolutely. Caregivers are so focused on taking care of others that they usually forget to take care of themselves, and it's screen as a sign of goodness instead of a red flag. If you jump into the river to save a drowning person, nobody asks you to drown, too, but we seem to expect that from many caretakers, as if taking time to relax or to do normal activities made you a bad caretaker.
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My cat of 16 years died this morning in his sleep. Didn't tell my 7 year old son because of Christmas. He is sleeping over his grandmothers house tonight and we are going to tell him tomorrow. We are devastated losing a family member, and I am dreading telling the poor kid.
This is so sad! I've had this happen to me before sadly. My beloved bunny that was house and command trained, had traveled the country with me and had been by my side for over a decade had a major stroke on Christmas one year. We had to have the on-call vet come in to humanely euthanize him since he couldn't eat, drink, or move half his body. I was devastated. It was my son's second Christmas, but first where he knew there were gifts (he was 13 months old). So incredibly heartbreaking
As a kid one of my cats, he was only 6 months. Was run over Christmas Eve. We found him by the side of the road. This is heartbreaking but at least the cat had a long and happy life
Load More Replies...Two weeks before Christmas 2022, we lost our 14 year old cat, who we rescued off the street as a half feral 6 month old. Two weeks after Christmas, we lost our 16 year old dog, also rescued off the street during a heatwave when he was 6 years old. The pre- and post-holiday weeks were really tough last year. The year before, we lost our 19 1/2 year old cat, who we rescued from a barn when he was 9 weeks old, which was also right after our first year anniversary, so he was in our lives for the majority of our marriage. At one point we had four cats and one dog. Now we’re down to two cats. I’m just glad they’re young and healthy, so we won’t lose them for a while.
We had a Christmas from hell where both kids had COVID, and so I was banished away from them because I'm high risk, then the cat had a stroke and our lovely neighbour vet had to come and put him to sleep in the garden
Very sad but the cat chose a special day. Keep her in your heart 16yrs is a long time for a cat
My cat of nearly 19 years passed away 2 weeks before this Christmas of a heart attack. I had already lost my husband this year at the end of January and my older cat (almost 20 years old) a week after him from cancer. The Christmas of 2022, we had spent finishing moving. The Christmas of 2021, my husband was sick and ended in the hospital on the 26th. The past 3 Christmases have been nightmares.
Entire family ruined it by uninviting me to Christmas because my aunt was offended I got vaccinated.
You just received a gift, my friend. Don't look back. Bears don't have family reunions!
The entire family though, it's hard to walk away, no matter how egregious.
Load More Replies...After my dad passed from covid my siblings invited me to the bar he used to own for a small memorial. I stayed away, but they and their kids caught covid from a waitress. 18 people in total.
One of my adult daughters is an antivaxxer and by proxy so are her kids. For thanksgiving she and two of her kids had covid. Then just last week for Christmas they had it again or else had a bad flue (not sure).
Load More Replies...And when you aren’t sick while they are, you won’t regret it. I was fully vaccinated and boosted and still got COVID last year from someone who “couldn’t possibly have it.” This year when I was told they’d be here again, I demanded they not be allowed if they even possibly could be sick or exposed. Sick people, STAY HOME! Covid or common cold. Doesn’t matter. People out here like myself that could land in the hospital just from getting a bad cold. Just stop already. Please.
A lot of things are outside of our control. Surprise blizzards. Transportation delays. People falling ill. But what we can control is how we react to all of these unfortunate circumstances. We can choose to let them get us stressed, frustrated, and angry beyond belief. Or we can embrace what’s happened and try to look for a silver lining. Or look for some comedy in the situation.
You can still have an enjoyable time even if you’re stuck in a traffic jam or your flight’s been delayed (for the third time that day). You can use the time to meet interesting people, read a good book, catch up on the news, eat some delicious food, or call your loved ones. Xmas is only ever truly ruined if we let it be that way.
My brother by existing. My family flew into Paris from one country, he flew in from another, and had a complete mental breakdown because no one came to the airport to escort him to our Airbnb and ordered him an Uber instead. He proceeded to scream and abuse my parents, stating that they abandoned him and left him to fend for himself in the wild unknown that is CDG airport. He then threatened to leave immediately and refused to leave his room, not even to eat, as a form of protest for my parents being so horrible to him.
He is 35 years old, and my parents bought his tickets and this trip is on their dime entirely.
Do your parents want to fly me out? I promise to be on my best behavior, provide stimulating conversations, be engaged with the family and show my appreciation. Lol
If he was my sone, he would have his return date moved up to the next flight out today, and have an Uber ordered to take his ungrateful a*s right back to the airport. Next year, if he wants to come to the family Christmas, he can damned well pay for his trip himself or not come (the latter being the preferred outcome, as he would only p**s on everyone else’s Christmas cheer anyway).
Sounds like someone who is and was spoiled thier entire life. This behavior screams of someone getting away with bad behavior for thier entire lives. Next year, grow a pair and cut him off so he can then see what they really do for him.
And his Christmas present was a package of diapers and a binky...act like a baby, get treated like one.
Grandma forgot where she hid the presents. Haven’t found them yet.
I can't believe you fell for this old chestnut, she never bought any in the first place 😪
Christmas morning, once the presents were all opened, I realized there was one for my husband that was missing. I can’t even remember if I wrapped it or not. Still haven’t found it. Luckily, there’s Valentines Day, his birthday, and our anniversary between now and summer, so I still have opportunities to give it to him. If I find it, that is. Luckily it’s not perishable. UPDATE: Found it! Unwrapped, so I can out appropriate non-Christmas wrapping paper on it. February 14th, here we come!
Lol. I've forgotten presents before and found them later....or after everyone opens gifts say "oops, we're missing something " then I go frantically search through my hiding spots
I hid $500 in a book one year so my ex couldn't spend it on drugs (2001 ish). Three moves later & and I STILL haven't find that money. NO - he didn't find it first. I'm just pissing myself thinking it may have been in a book I donated to GoodWill.
My ex. Told me she was going to stay the night at her mom's house on Christmas Eve because she missed her. I said yes that's your mom, go spend time with her and that we'd met up in the morning. Her mom is calling me Christmas morning asking to speak with her and that she couldn't get ahold of her. I said she should be over there, correct. Her mom said nope she hasn't seen her all night. That's how I found out she was cheating on me.
Edit: Thanks everyone for your words. I'm doing fine and will be ok through it all. Going to be living with family for a bit. And for anyone curious, we were together for 5 years.
I hope you told her mom. Not fan of being tattle tale, but if you play stupid games…. Make certain you tell the alibi. Also not a fan of cheaters and think that they deserve to be drawn and quartered in the most realistic and historically accurate sense.
Freedom is a gift. Stings at first, sorry for that, but you're far better off!
WoW!!!! That's the worst to happen on Christmas. Say strong and don't let it ruin future holidays!
As we’ve covered on Bored Panda very recently, if we see that the current way we’re celebrating Christmas isn’t doing us any good, we need to have the courage to change things.
If you find that your family traditions are stressing you out and that it’s unpleasant to spend time with certain people, we should not feel guilty about switching up the dynamic next year. We are not supposed to feel completely exhausted and angry once we’re done celebrating.
Not my Christms ruined, but my friends. Her parents left home to stay in Florida, they were supposed to come back for Thanksgiving. They did not come back. Her parents were supposed to come back yesterday, Christmas Eve to spend time with their kids. They did not. Her parents left her (17), her sister (an adult but legally blind), and her grandmother (who literally just had a stroke and is in the hospital) alone. No financial support, the only person bringing in money is her. She couldn't even celebrate christmas with her family, just her sister. For the past few nights my family has invited her to dinner to help out. I feel so bad for her, no teenage girl should have to go through such stressful events without the support of her parents during Christmas.
That's not legal, assuming they're in the US given the details. It's considered child abandonment and if there is an adult child in their care that is disabled it also goes against them. Wtf is wrong with people?!
The laws they have now about parents not leaving their kids alone, they were put in place because the Me Generation, a subset of Boomers, left their kids alone so much that laws had to be created to protect children from their parents. We were called Latch Key kids.
Load More Replies...Like... they left and are never coming back, or just haven't "finished vacationing"???
There was an AITA a while ago. Preteen's parents tell her that they're going out of the country for a year, she can stay with her best friend's family, won't that be fun? Except it was something like *seven* years from the time they dropped OP off, to the time they bothered coming back. During that time, Best Friend's parents offered to adopt OP, because literally nobody knew if OP's parents were even still alive. When Bio Mom and Bio Dad finally deigned to reappear after seven years, they called OP the AH for even considering letting Best Friend's parents adopt her. OP's parents were universally voted the AHs, not OP, and IIRC their parental rights were terminated and OP was adopted by Best Friend's family.
Load More Replies...Those parents are terrible. I will say that 17 yr old will be one tough person, if she can get over the trauma.
If she's 17 call the police and have the parents arrested for child abandonment
My mom told everyone that there’s not going to be anymore babies in the family anyway, so my sister can throw away my son’s crib.
I am actively trying to get pregnant and have been taking steps and working on my health to make it happen as I had cervical cancer last year and a few other uterine issues. And for those wondering, yes, she and everyone else in the room is aware of all of this.
If/when a pregnancy does happen she doesn’t deserve the title of grandmother. What an insensitive witch. While on your health journey consider going low/no contact. As well as physical you need to ensure you work on your emotional wellbeing and her comments don’t help that.
When you finally get pregnant, tell your mom she doesn't get the chance to be grandma, she doesn't deserve it...totally go NC with her.
Screw her, I am sending you the best thoughts to become pregnant ❤️
Maybe she is one of those people that believes if she plans against it then it will happen. I think that way but know its too tacky to say out loud.
I drove 12 hours to get “home” to my dad’s house, staying 5 days because he guilts me for never staying more than 2 nights. I’m divorced, with grown kids (they were coming in later) so it’s just me and him for the first three days.
My first day here… he tells me at noon he’s leaving at 1:30 because he has plans with his lady friend. He invites me to dinner at her house, but tells me he’s spending the night there. I decline the dinner, and plan to have a solo day in my hometown. Annoying he ditched me, but whatever.
I spend my day running errands, come back to his place early, order my favorite local takeout, wrap presents and fall asleep on the couch…
THIS MF’R… at 5:30am he feels like something isn’t right, and checks his home thermostat app on his phone. He sees the temp at an egregious 71°. Knowing he set it to 68°, he’s SURE I have fallen asleep upstairs, left the gas logs on, and the house is about to burn down with me in it… so he does what any 72 year old would do with a 45 year old son staying at his place…
THE MAN COMES HOME AND JERKS ME OUT OF MY SLEEP ON THE COUCH AND RIPS ME A NEW A*****E. I’m talking veins in the neck bulging, spittle flying while he’s yelling type of new a*****e. For 3°!?!? He then spends FIVE HOURS questioning me on everything about my career, personal life, mental health, etc… truly riding my a*s.
So yeah, probably the last Christmas I ever “come home.”
Give yourself the gift of never doing that again. Seriously, you don't owe that türd bucket a thing.
OMG I spit coffee!!!🤣🤣🤣 Türd bucket... I'm stealing that one
Load More Replies...Why don't people interrupt other people's meltdowns? I don't have time for this sort of drama.
Sounds like OP's dad lives alone. I can see why. I hope his "lady friend" breaks his heart (if he even has one).
What we should do instead is focus on the activities and people that genuinely bring us joy. And it’s never wrong to talk to your family and friends about how you’re going to be doing things differently next time and why.
How did you enjoy the holidays this year, dear Pandas? What kinds of family traditions do you have? Have you ever had a Christmas that got ruined in the past? Did you manage to salvage it in some shape or form back then? Share your experiences and opinions in the comment section below.
Girlfriend stayed the night. Went to her place this am. Found her cat dead. Had been fighting an illness but had seemed much better.
Wouldn’t say ruined Christmas. Just a sad end of the day.
Sheesh, this post near bottom while “(otherwise healthy) dog vomited over (wrapped) presents” near top of list…
Probably because this is depressing while a dog puking on presents is gross, but can at least be laughed off.
Load More Replies...The fact that he died alone breaks my heart. Not OP's fault, just saying.
"wouldn't say ruined Christmas", you absolute heartless garbage human. yes it ruined christmas. it probably ruined the whole rest of the year and well into January too. pets are family. ask your girlfriend how she's doing. go read this: https://www.boredpanda.com/therapist-about-importance-pets/ act like a human, for god's sake.
Drove 4 hours to spend the day with my dad (at his request 3 weeks ago) then immediately after lunch, not even dinner, he said he and his new girlfriend (of 4 weeks) were invited to a friend’s dinner and were going there. My drive was longer than the time spent he spent with me at his house. So now I’m watching Christmas movies and drinking with my grandma instead. After trying fix our relationship that’s been rocky since I was a teenager (now in my 30s), it’s great to realize he truly doesn’t care
That's just awful. At least, now you know what you can expect from him. Cheers to you and your grandma!
I hope the OP realizes, the "dad" invited him to his house so "dad" could go off with the girlfriend and someone would be there for grandma.
Kudos to grandma! Your dad has shown his true colors, believe them and keep him at arms length
I hope that realization frees you! My life took a huge turn when I realized my mother was never going to change and I got to move on from trying. All the best to you!
My wife did by immediately after opening all the presents, tell me how disappointed she is in what I got her. Or I guess I did by buying her s****y presents depending on your point of view.
Update to answer some questions:
We’ve been married for 25 years
Most of the gifts were from her Christmas list. She was unhappy that I didn’t also buy things not from the list.
Creative things I’ve surprised her with in the past.
Once I got her favorite artist (Dar Williams) to call her for her birthday.
For her 50th I surprised her with a convertible Vw beetle
I’ve surprised her by flying her friends out to stay with us for Christmas a few years ago.
It’s not that i can’t be creative. I just wasnt this year
I spent hours and hours wrapping gifts for my husband and children (all but 1 15 yr. Old are adults) knowing I wouldn't have 1 single gift to open...and I didn't. She should be thankful for what she got. I can't tell you how many doubles I worked, whilst having cancer, to make that happen. I no longer get heartbroken. It just is how it is.
Next year tell them all to pound sand. Why should you kill yourself if none of them can be arsed to get you a single present?
Load More Replies...So many people go without and your wife is complaining about getting gifts only from her list? Talk about first world problems and privilege!
Honestly, I don't think she really cares about the presents. It's control. Whatever he does, she will complain, so she always makes sure she's going to ruin his day and make him feel unhappy, less worthy and inadequate. She also makes him doubt his choices and decisions, every single time.
Load More Replies...It also depends on the person's reaction to presents. If your wife is like my mother, whose answer to whatever you do fir her or whatever you give her is "it's ok, but..." you just lose the energy and the enthusiasm. Honestly, all these articles about Christmas are depressing me more and more. I didn't know there were so many s****y people on the planet.
Maybe she would like what my husband gets me- nothing. And it’s my birthday too.
I’d say it sounds like you trained her wrong by being such a wonderful spouse and so giving. Apparently she’s the type that expects Grand gestures on an increasingly expensive scale. Sorry you are locked into that She sounds like a miserable ingrate.
It's one thing to be disappointed if you'd actually ignored the list, and just bought things *you* thought she "should" have. But if you went out of your way to buy her most (if not all) of the stuff on her list, and now she's pouting because you're not psychic and didn't get her anything *else,* wow, that's pretty entitled. You'd think a 50-something woman would've gotten over that decades ago, but I guess not.
Nobody gets over entitlement unless they are forced to. People like her feed on other people's mental energy, love and compassion, and they don't stop until people around them put their foot down and start treating them like the pieces of s**t they are. I don't think they can change, but they learn to behave in a slightly more civilised way. Asking an entitled narcissist to think of anything but themselves, their needs and their wishes is like asking a blind person to open their eyes and see. You need to accept it and learn to act accordingly. I'm in that process now. It hurts, but it's the only way to heal.
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My mom. Screaming at and in front of everyone (including the kids and my elderly grandmother who came out of hospital this morning) that she doesn't want to be a full-time carer for my grandmother. No one asked her to care for my grandma. For the past few years Mom has been asking grandma for her inheritance early so she could buy a house, grandma always said no. Mom moved in with grandma a month ago and now wants grandma to move out so mom can live in the house alone rent free. Where grandma is supposed to go is beyond me as mom has refused to participate in plans for a care home etc because it will likely involve selling the house to pay for this.
Damn, poor grandma. I'm sorry this is your mom we're talking about but I consider that kind of people who'd leave their parents in a ditch so they could get what they want just horrible. I hope your grandma can change her will or plans for inheritance when the time comes. I feel so sorry for her, I can't imagine how she felt while your mother yelled like that. :(
My uncle did something similar with my grandmother years ago, when she was dying of cancer. I will never, ever, ever, forgive him for the pain he caused. Never. Even if I lived ten lives. Apparently *I* am a bad, resentful person for refusing to turn a new leaf. He has never admitted he was wrong, and has not shown any remorse. I hate him.
Load More Replies...And this is why I snort when people say "Who will look after you when you're old?!" to convince me to have kids.
I have 2 adult kids that rightfully have their own lives to build & live. I live in NC & my oldest lives in TX w/their life partner & child while my youngest still lives in NC but lives close to 2 hours away. It would be massively unfair of me to expect either of them to give up building their future just to take care of me. I’m only 50 but have been out on disability since the end of 2011. I could sure use the help & would welcome either of them into my home if they ever needed a place to go. But not so they can give up everything to care for me. Meanwhile both my sibs & my niece do their best to look in on me when they aren’t traveling for work. My parents live close to 2 hours away. So I’m literally out here near family but still on my own in many ways. We are all working to find the best way for me to stay out of assisted living again (I had a stay in assisted living for 7 months from 2021-2022.). I had worked hard to recover my health to be assaulted & needing help again. Anyone expecting their kids to care for them are plain wrong.
Load More Replies...I have a woodchipper and access to 500 acres of outback land full of wild pigs, feel free to leave your abusive relatives with me for "daycare". (for the bacon, this is a joke).
Your mom can go kick rocks! If that's how she feels, she should not be alone with grandma! She may neglect or abuse her
On the face of this the Mom sounds horrible. However, we (and the granddaughter) have no idea how the Grandma treated the Mom when she was younger. Yeah, the Mom sounds like she's greedy and entitled but Grandma may not be an angel either (the Mom had to learn from somewhere).
My dad just ruined Christmas dinner for me. I was switching two chairs at the dinner table -one with arms was too tight against the table and next to impossible to get into. He literally hollered at me for moving the chair. Apparently he’d done some measuring and was getting a few extra chairs that he thought would only fit a certain way, and was already mad that no one had put the extra leafs in the table. Which I knew nothing about, I was just going to sit next to my kid. It was goddamn humiliating, I know I shouldn’t be the one who was embarrassed and I tried to shake it off but found my eyes welling up with tears anyway. I’m going thru a divorce from my emotionally abusive husband of 20 years and he’s being awful about our 12 year old and I’m just more emotionally fragile than I realized.
Sounds like your father is as abusive as your husband. They do not deserve you. Run, don't walk, to the nearest exit!
kinda sounds like your dad is WHY you were in that abusive relationship…
Load More Replies...It’s not uncommon for someone who had a difficult relationship with a parent to choose a partner who embodies similar traits in an effort to “fix” that partner and heal themselves emotionally.
No, we end up in horrible relationships because that's all we know. That's all that's been modelled for us. We have no idea how to be in a healthy relationship because we've never seen it. I'm 54, I've been through 2 divorces, and it took a horrible life changing event for me to realize a lot of things. I'm now very happily single, and I will stay that way.
Load More Replies...Your child should not have to see this. You both deserve better.
Sounds like your "father" is how you ended up conditioned to think that kind of treatment is "love." I'm glad you're finally out of your abusive marriage, and I hope you never speak to your "father" again.
I'm certainly not excusing the father's behavior, especially if it's typical, but if it isn't he may be experiencing some cognitive decline. It can cause some people to behave that way.
And some people always were that way and just stopped glazing it over
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80 year old uncle ruined Christmas Eve with family (had to cancel). He got lost while hunting, but not terribly far from road. He heard my brother in law and my grandfather searching for him but was embarrassed so waited to come out at sunrise after everyone went home after hours of searching but before everyone came back (or so he thought). My 80 year old grandfather, uncles brother, had open heart surgery heart this year and is going through radiation for cancer and couldn't sleep all night thinking his brother died in the woods. Grandfather and other older family members ended feeling so bad from stress we had to cancel.
He was embarrassed for getting lost but he wasn't embarrassed for keeping the whole family sick with worry for a whole night thinking he might be dead. I just can't understand some people's "logic".
Load More Replies...Only thing dumber than getting lost is refusing to admit that you are lost.
Let’s hope you NEVER have to actually deal with a person who has dementia bc thats what it is!!!
Load More Replies...If you can hear people calling your name, your "embarrassment" is decidedly overwhelmed by the distress your family members must be feeling, thinking the worst when they can't find you. There's no shame in getting lost, but it takes a special kind of narcissism to make your family members worry for a longer period of time than strictly necessary, just so *you* won't be "embarrassed."
Old people's brains often can't function properly anymore. See exhibit A.
Gonna put everyone else through mental and emotional hell because he wanted to protect his ego? -_-
Not sure you should let your 80 year old grandpa go hunting on his own?
He wasn't on his own. He was with a group of people, but he walked away from the group for some reason and got lost. Not really lost, only disorientated, but he didn't want to admit he had got disorientated and he took an unbelievably stupid decision. Had he not been so proud, the "problem" would have been solved in ten minutes. Anyway,people are different. Not every 80 year old person is helpless. My father is 80 and he still rides his motorbike, cleans the roof and does some other nerve-wrecking stuff.
Load More Replies...hiding out in the woods, too embarassed to come in? Yeah, almost did the whole "died from embarrasment" that people use as a figure of speech
My mom invited my ex-girlfriend to the family zoom (because she's still family?). My Girlfriend of two years wasn't too stoked to meet her.
As the ex-gf WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO JOIN THAT ZOOM? Send a card if you are still close with the parents but wtf a family zoom?
I guess this is all dependent on how long you were with the ex? But, a heads up should have been given ahead of time!
I love my parents, but years ago when I was first separated from my ex, I had to put my mom in place because she kept trying to involve my cheating and abusive ex and his new gf. Told her if she invited them, neither I nor the kids would be there. Was told it was a very unchristian like attitude. But it’s ok somehow to just invite the cheater/abuser and completely ruin things for me and the kids. She only made the mistake once. Was very red faced embarrassed when she had to retract the invite.
I feel like this one is on the guy. the rest of the family doesn't have to hate the ex because they broke up. I still talk to my exes and hang out with some of them.
I'd agree if he were still alone after the breakup, but it’s a passive-aggressive jab at the new girlfriend.
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Norovirus. Was up all night with a vomiting 6 year old and I had to “sleep” on the floor in their room. He last vomited about 4:30am today.
Stripped the vomit-covered sheets and showered him in the middle of the night because he was covered. My hips are killing me from sleeping on the floor. Merry Christmas!
And the parents don’t get it next. Miserable to be sick. Worse when the kid is sick and now you are too. Very difficult to take care of others while this sick
Load More Replies...So hang on, your poor kid is sick and it’s Christmas, but you’re busy writing this post complaining? If he’s covered in vomit it’s your job as a parent to clean him and change his linen. Poor you and your sore hips but he’s feeling a whole lot worse.
Someday the two of you will look back on this and laugh...well, he'll laugh!
I can feel this story to my bones, I've done the same for my boy a few years ago. You're a great parent. Merry Christmas!
The one time I had norovirus, it hit just as I was about to have two days off from work anyway. By the morning of the third day, I still wasn't feeling 100%, so I called in sick. At least I only missed one day of work.
Grandparents told everyone how they get one person something really nice each year and that it was finally my turn. They 'gave' me the really nice big green egg and patio desk i was saving for. Then after they looked real nice to everyone and everyone else was gone they told me it was actually a loan and I would need to pay them to keep it. I told them to f**k off.
Wth! What kind of gift is that? "Here's your Christmas gift. But, oh! You have to pay us back for them, even though we didn't ask you if that was ok"
I like the way he responded lol can't blame him. His grandparents sound like greedy douchebags.
There's a german phrase for another perfect answer: "Geschenkt ist geschenkt, wieder holen ist gestohlen." Roughly translates to "A present is a present, taken back means stolen."
Put my husband and kids on a plane to go join the rest of our family on vacation while I drove 12 hours in the opposite direction to be with my dying dad.
I'm so sorry. I hope you made it and time and can make the most out of your time with dad
So sorry you're losing your dad and won't have your family with you for support.
The drunk a*****e that was joyriding last night and totalled my car in a hit and run did a good job of ruining my day.
Don't know why you were downvoted for a legit concern/question, but I gave you an upvote towards correcting it
Load More Replies...My cousin's brother smashed up her new car on her wedding day. He lived and is a good guy but...
I gave my little girl a drone. It went up in the air the first time and just kept going and going and going. That was like 8 hours ago. Could still be going….
My parents got my niblings a bunch of beach toys for xmas, including frisbees. The very first thing one of my nephews did was throw his frisbee up on the neighbour's roof. It belongs to the roof gods now.
The kids I babysit live 4 roads over and they must their drone Christmas eve. My husband found it 2 days later by our house. They had used a rock to hold the button up to fly and it got stuck and I guess it lost signal and crashed near our house...it worked out...lol
This reminds me of Peppa Pig cartoon where Peppa’s dad got a drone for Christmas that fly to charge itself when it’s almost empty. Dad was so excited that he forgot to change home setting and drone flew to North Pole to Santa Claus home. Maybe your drone did the same.
First time I flew my gas-powered gift airplane I flew it right into a big pine tree. Oops.
My 11 year old son, except he doesn’t know it. I LOVE Christmas and I tend to go over board every year with my kids. (I over compensate for my lack of ever having a happy Christmas time growing up). My son is at the age of making inappropriate jokes all the time ( I had no idea you could make that many ball jokes in one day) Anyways we were trying to watch movies as a family and he was sent to his room due to him being asked to stop repeating the same joke over and over because he wasn’t getting a reaction. Well he went on a rant about it being child abuse and us favoriting his 14 year old sister more. This is his usual insult when punished. He screams child abuse at the littlest inconvenience. Apparently this is a trigger for me I was physically, mentally and at one point sexually abused as a child. Knowing that he had probably $1,000 worth of things under the tree for him to open the next morning just kinda broke me. I cried myself to sleep last night and I didn’t want to get up the morning.
Time for your son to learn what abuse truly means. No, I don't mean by demonstrating it, but rather explain what abuse is. How some children and adults live. I'm a survivor of abuse, it still haunts me to this day.
Ime, telling people stuff doesn't work, way more than it does. Gotta take him into the fallout somehow.
Load More Replies...Perhaps it's high time you stopped going overboard trying to please that little piece of narcissist s**t your are bringing up. It's sad, but unfortunately, it's your fault. And it's dangerous. You are letting your child accuse you of a very serious crime as if it were a joke. You need to stop it now. Sending him to his room, where he probably has everything, is not enough. He needs to face the consequences of his words. I would have hidden all his presents. No presents for him this Christmas. Nothing. That to start with. He's far too entitled, and manipulative, and he knows damn well how to control you. You are a good mother. Do no let anyone, not even your child, make you feel you aren't.
This is when you have a no-holds-barred conversation with your kid. I get that you want to protect his feelings, but it shouldn't come at the expense of yours. He needs to learn and giving him time out won't teach him how to be more empathetic.
Translation: You have $1000 worth of returns under the tree. Then when your son sees he has no gifts, tell him it's a joke...and keep saying it if he doesn't laugh the first time
Go with him to donate them to a children's charity.
Load More Replies...If he was under 6 years of age this might be understandable. An 11 year old (preteen) behaving this way knows what he needs to do to push Mom's buttons. Mom needs to step up, start parenting, and stop this behaviour before he grows into a bigger AH than he already is. And what's with repeating a joke over and over because he doesn't get the reaction he wants? Apparently he knows exactly how to get the reaction he wants out of Mom when she attempts any discipline.
Your child is the type of kid who ruins my day at school, I literally attempted die because of kids like him. You need to ground your kid, take ACTUAL action instead of playing nice. He. Needs. Discipline. If you don’t do it, then he’ll end up in the wrong crowd. (He also probably screams the N slur and the F slur in school and jokes about sa)
These kids probably learned it from the internet or a friend with the internet. Children need to be off the internet.. (I had access to an old pc when I was 6.. I'm speaking from experience. Bad idea.)
I honestly hope OP returned all the gifts. He doesn't deserve any of them. If anything, get him socks and underwear, essentials for a kid. Can't claim child abuse when you provide necessities over frivolities.
Mom got hammered Christmas eve and woke up for a midnight snack of the Christmas dinner. Left it all out and the dog ate it all
The dog was a very good boi this year it seems. Santa was definitely impressed.
My mother used to work with a lady who wasn't very bright, and was also known for not being a good cook. One Christmas Eve, Friend decides she's gonna put a standing rib roast in the oven all night, on low heat, so it'll be ready by Christmas morning. Next morning, things are so busy, she forgets about the roast until smoke starts billowing from the oven. She yanks the roast out, sticks it in the backyard to cool down (winter in Chicago), thinking she'll scrape off the unburned bits to make chipped beef--and the dogs ate the entire roast.
My mother. She screamed at my dad like a banshee at about 6am. All my dad did was put water in the coffee maker. When you put water in, it immediately starts brewing. I guess that was too early in the morning to start the coffee? I’m not exactly sure what her beef was.
For context: For the first time in several years,
my entire immediate family were all under one roof for an extended period of time. We were staying at my grandmother’s house for the holidays. My mother has always been prone to fits of rage. Growing up, she exploded often. I haven’t been around it in 9 years, neither have my brothers, but we got an ugly reminder of her behavior yesterday morning.
My dad doesn’t believe in divorce. He works nights to avoid her. They pass like ships in the night. They have separate bedrooms and separate lives. My dad’s uncle just passed away, that’s why we all came together. We typically don’t celebrate Christmas together.
I overpaid to fly home today, and I opted out of Christmas dinner to do so. I left two days before everyone else. I can’t do it. It’s as if she’s possessed by a demon.
Time for your dad to consider seperate homes. No need to divorce, just move out
Honestly sounds like mom has mental health issues. And while I could easily try to armchair diagnose her, I will not do so as I could be projecting. When my issues aren’t properly treated, I’m a bit of a nightmare. As such, I try extra hard to keep my treatment going. (No idea what I’m going to do this coming year since my insurance no longer covers my current clinic. At least my family knows and realizes I might need a bit of grace while I’m desperately seeking consistent care.)
I really feel this, avoided home for years,that was how our mother was. Thankfully, she changed when she got older. Many happy days, finally got along, and loved her. Took 50 years. Lost her just before Christmas, dad in January...so it was a hard, sad quite day. Lovec those you have, if you can, while you can. Those days are shorter than we know.
My sister brought her dog who immediately walked over and threw up all over my kid's presents as if he'd been planning to do that all year.
This made me laugh actually. It's definitely sad, but still a funny situation
Reminds me of the time my partner put down a new rug down and our dog immediately walked onto the rug and threw up on it. I don't think she liked the colour.
Load More Replies...He wasn't planning it. All the excitement couldn't be contained! He's sorry.
Were your kids bad? Maybe Santa's getting aggressive with punishment
My parent's puppy managed to open and eat half a jar of THC body balm and had to be taken to the emergency vet at 1 am. She threw up a large mango sized menthol dog treat vomit ball in my hand. She got meds and monitored and is doing much .much better now
I have bought thc lotions and balms. And it most certainly contained THC.
Load More Replies...There’s the boomer attitude. I knew I’d find you here. THC is far safer than any opiate on the market. Human cannot die from taking too much. More effective, less needed. Don’t place your personal values and ignorant beliefs upon the rest of us. Educating oneself is so easy, how about you research your ignorant beliefs before posting anything.
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Brother in Law. 12:06am. Breakfast casserole knocked out of the fridge and all over the floor as he was reaching for another midnight snack. Six minutes flat, impressive.
OMG yes and it's divine!!! Sausage eggs potatoes cheese.........mmmmmmmm
Load More Replies...Sorry, but I think I’d make him recreate it while he was up for his snack.
Not my morning but my night. I just caught my old man of 14 years with another woman.
Me. Halfway thru opening gifts with the family, I was in enormous pain. Wound up spending most of the day in the ER. Kidney stones. I could have done without this gift/surprise.
As someone who has had, and still has, kidney stones... that is a "gift" that you definitely don't want to get. I hope you are feeling better now.
Maybe it's a German gift. (The word Gift in German literally means poison)
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Both cats scarfed and barfed. Getting out the carpet cleaner was not in the plans today.
If your cats are barfing right after eating, you're feeding them too much, and likely food that isn't great quality. So, aside from getting better quality food, get some catgrass plants and put them around the house. the cats will munch on the grass, filling their tummies a bit and helping break down any hairballs/foodballs that could be "stuck" in their system. Also, more water sources, especially from motorised bowls that keep water moving. Just don't put them right next to food, cats seem to prefer having their food and water sources separate.
My cat does it and it's just because she sometimes eats too fast. Thus the scarf and barf name. Most times she takes one piece at a time and chews it. Sometimes will bring a mouthful into the living room, spit it out next to me, and eat it one piece at a time like she's sharing a meal with me. Other times it's like she thinks me or my daughter are going to eat her food and she'd better eat fast. Doesn't chew at all these times. (I know from cleaning it up she's not chewing it.) Only pet. On prescription food now because of bladder stones, but has done this since she was a kitten. Vet is not concerned because she's maintaining her weight and health. Vet just says "yeah, some cats are weird like that."
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My two year old. When I got him up this morning, he kept saying "A mess, a mess". I thought he meant his toy tractor, which had something stuck to the wheels. While cleaning it, I couldn't figure out what it was, and then I thought to check his room. He had thrown up. Everywhere.
On his bed, blankets, pillows, play mat, rocking chair, ect. I woke up my husband and we started cleaning. Partway through it got to me and I started throwing up. (I'm three months pregnant so can't handle stuff like that) My husband had to finish cleaning alone, and shampooing the chair and mattress. Not how we imagined starting Christmas!
How does one get a 2 year old up without seeing a room covered in vomit?
2 year olds getup themselves. Parents probably hadn't been in his room yet.
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Boomer grandparents exploded into a religious fit because i have a ball python... f*****g stupid.
We got our granddaughter a banana ball python for Christmas. She’s 13. He’s the cutest!
Don't blame their age. A lot of people are not comfortable around snakes. I'm a boomer my daughter had snakes I had a couple. But I've had other people who would not come in my house that were her peers or later younger than her older than her all sorts of Ages
I can understand having a fit over a pet python but a *religious* fit? What does religion have to do with python ownership?
Because Adam & Eve & the bad snake 🙄 it's just stupid🤦♀️
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It's me. I'm the problem. I got my kid a VR headset. I let him open it last night.... I played it for 4 straight hours this morning and left him sleeping in late so he wouldn't take it away. We were the last to arrive and just barely on time for my family thing.
I see no problems here. You made it to the family get together, you’re good
My FIL who texted my husband this morning and asked if I was pregnant again, because the entire family decided I looked a little round at Christmas Eve dinner
My FIL just says things like 'you've put on weight' (lost it since though, hah!).
I just got a text from my a*****e stalker. He won’t leave me alone even though I haven’t spoken to his significant other in almost 3 years. He just has to keep harassing me.
Because they keep swapping numbers, and/or sending from fake numbers with an app.
Load More Replies...My aunt asking me "aren't you too old to still be living at home?". I don't know, Wendy, aren't you too old to still be a f*****g b***h?
Witnessed a dog drown on Boxing Day and had to do CPR on him. Got him back but he sadly died later that night. Keep having flashbacks and all I see when I shut my eyes. I guess his poor family are having a worse Christmas though, they were distraught when we pulled him out lifeless and I was doing CPR. Cuddle your pets extra hard tonight and learn CPR for pets and humans!
I'm so sorry but thank you so much for trying. Poor dog, that's so very sad. I'll second your recommendation for learning CPR for pets and humans - though a while ago that I did the pet one and I think I might try and do a refresher course.
Load More Replies...we got a letter from the state, the week before xmas, saying that my disabled mother had been kicked off her carer program. getting a straight answer of why or whether or not it was true was hell in a handbasket, and didnt get fixed until today (the 28th). we cancelled so many plans just to wait twiddling our thumbs for a phone call from the govt that never came. the punchline? it was a system error; those letters were never supposed to be sent. all those lost memories and the terror and anger just makes my blood boil.
Last year (2022) one of my neighbors' houses burned until it was gutted. Bad enough when your house catches fire - but on Christmas? Ugh! Many blessings on the firefighters who battled that blaze. Thankfully, though, they did rebuild - must have had great insurance, and knew some good contractors. Only 7-8 months later, their house looks as though nothing happened.
This year Christmas really sucked. On Friday the 22nd I got the news that I have cancer. So instead of relaxing I spent the last few days making calls to arrange everything I need before the surgery, blood tests, CT etc. A lot of places are closed this week, so that was fun.
Cannot begin to imagine what type of person would downvote this. Here’s an upvote to bring it back to zero. I’m so sorry you are having to deal with this. Prayers for successful treatment so that next year you can announce cancer free.
Load More Replies...Husband died in September, 1st time sister contacted me since. No condolence, no How are you - just wanted to share her dna results, when I said I was not interested and I was done with her homophobic, bigoted c**p. i was told i was immature and she felt sorry for me for rejecting her. ( Not for losing my husband of 40 yrs)
Dear God, that is so beyond self-absorbed. I'm so sorry for your loss, and I hope you have good support from others in your life. ❤️
Load More Replies...My mom lost her sh*t at my spouse and I. After agreeing to be there for Christmas eve & day, we made the 2.5+ hour drive and were greeted with comments about how infrequent and short our visits are. We had groceries delivered to her place because there's not enough food there. We arrived before lunch. I had forgotten to make sure we had lunch items. Everything else was off limits for later. My mom told us to wait for dinner, which was just soup that she knew we don't like. We offered to go to the store for more food and she just lost it and used the most hurtful words. Said my spouse deserves the toxic family he has. She kicked us out. Threw the presents in a box. We just left everything there. The presents. The groceries. I cried all the way home. She has yet to reach out to us. I'm still very hurt.
when my grandmother passed on christmas eve in '97 it shattered the family. so, since then, the holidays have been a bit of a down time. then, my mom passed on christmas eve a few years ago. with the exception of my son who has a young child the rest of the family have just kind of dreaded the holidays and feel relieved when they are over. it would be different if they had passed on at a different time but when the entire world starts winding up in november for the day it's hard to keep it off your mind.
My aunt asking me "aren't you too old to still be living at home?". I don't know, Wendy, aren't you too old to still be a f*****g b***h?
Witnessed a dog drown on Boxing Day and had to do CPR on him. Got him back but he sadly died later that night. Keep having flashbacks and all I see when I shut my eyes. I guess his poor family are having a worse Christmas though, they were distraught when we pulled him out lifeless and I was doing CPR. Cuddle your pets extra hard tonight and learn CPR for pets and humans!
I'm so sorry but thank you so much for trying. Poor dog, that's so very sad. I'll second your recommendation for learning CPR for pets and humans - though a while ago that I did the pet one and I think I might try and do a refresher course.
Load More Replies...we got a letter from the state, the week before xmas, saying that my disabled mother had been kicked off her carer program. getting a straight answer of why or whether or not it was true was hell in a handbasket, and didnt get fixed until today (the 28th). we cancelled so many plans just to wait twiddling our thumbs for a phone call from the govt that never came. the punchline? it was a system error; those letters were never supposed to be sent. all those lost memories and the terror and anger just makes my blood boil.
Last year (2022) one of my neighbors' houses burned until it was gutted. Bad enough when your house catches fire - but on Christmas? Ugh! Many blessings on the firefighters who battled that blaze. Thankfully, though, they did rebuild - must have had great insurance, and knew some good contractors. Only 7-8 months later, their house looks as though nothing happened.
This year Christmas really sucked. On Friday the 22nd I got the news that I have cancer. So instead of relaxing I spent the last few days making calls to arrange everything I need before the surgery, blood tests, CT etc. A lot of places are closed this week, so that was fun.
Cannot begin to imagine what type of person would downvote this. Here’s an upvote to bring it back to zero. I’m so sorry you are having to deal with this. Prayers for successful treatment so that next year you can announce cancer free.
Load More Replies...Husband died in September, 1st time sister contacted me since. No condolence, no How are you - just wanted to share her dna results, when I said I was not interested and I was done with her homophobic, bigoted c**p. i was told i was immature and she felt sorry for me for rejecting her. ( Not for losing my husband of 40 yrs)
Dear God, that is so beyond self-absorbed. I'm so sorry for your loss, and I hope you have good support from others in your life. ❤️
Load More Replies...My mom lost her sh*t at my spouse and I. After agreeing to be there for Christmas eve & day, we made the 2.5+ hour drive and were greeted with comments about how infrequent and short our visits are. We had groceries delivered to her place because there's not enough food there. We arrived before lunch. I had forgotten to make sure we had lunch items. Everything else was off limits for later. My mom told us to wait for dinner, which was just soup that she knew we don't like. We offered to go to the store for more food and she just lost it and used the most hurtful words. Said my spouse deserves the toxic family he has. She kicked us out. Threw the presents in a box. We just left everything there. The presents. The groceries. I cried all the way home. She has yet to reach out to us. I'm still very hurt.
when my grandmother passed on christmas eve in '97 it shattered the family. so, since then, the holidays have been a bit of a down time. then, my mom passed on christmas eve a few years ago. with the exception of my son who has a young child the rest of the family have just kind of dreaded the holidays and feel relieved when they are over. it would be different if they had passed on at a different time but when the entire world starts winding up in november for the day it's hard to keep it off your mind.
