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People Expose 40 Performative Behaviors They Can’t Stand, And It Says A Lot About Society
Masking, also called camouflaging or compensating, is when a person hides their natural self to fit in with others. Individuals can adopt the behavior subconsciously as a coping mechanism or a trauma response, or do it intentionally to avoid judgment and conflict.
To learn more about how the phenomenon manifests, Reddit user Melancholytty07 asked everyone on the platform to share the things people do that are purely performative, even though many act like they aren't. The community's responses reveal just how ordinary these acts really are.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
‘Thoughts and prayers’ posts. Just stop it. DO something or just be quiet.
Bob Brezniak 3 months ago
"Thoughts and prayers" won't bring back the people who die from gun violence every FREAKING day.
Julia Mckinney 3 months ago
I prefer "tots & pears" because those can be eaten, therefore doing some good. Thoughts and prayers do nothing.
Jude Corrigan 3 months ago
If I am approached by any religious individual who tries to get me to donate to whatever charity they have. I always say that ,'I will donate thoughts and prayers'.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
How about, “I’m very sorry for your loss. Let’s make sure this doesn’t happen again.”?
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Ellinor she/they/elle 3 months ago
Yeah but to someone who is NOT Christian, it's actually worse than saying nothing.
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#2
A baby is the most precious thing on earth. Protect the life of every child! Children are a blessing! How could anyone harm a child?
Erm.. clears throat. Votes to take away free school lunch, reduced housing prices, slashes food stamps, cuts funding for transportation leaving children at risk on the way to the bus stop, removes protections for children on state health insurance.
Then they claim they never said they would pay for the child. It is the parent’s responsibility and the burden shouldn’t be on the tax payers. The parent should have considered the life it would receive before conceiving and having said “precious child”.
Performative bullcr*p that makes my blood boil.
Uncle Panda 3 months ago (edited)
This is fun. "How many orphaned babies have you *personally* adopted? None? Oh." They exit stage left very quickly.
BrownEyedGrrl 3 months ago
I always think this. They only want them protected until they're born.
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Roxy222uk 3 months ago
And do you know what else? So many parents are really struggling to be good parents due to awful circumstances, problems with mental health, bad childhoods that taught them nothing about how to demonstrate love and kindness, and so on. Wouldn’t it be amazing if they could access the support they need to change their lives around and stop the cycle of misery? But performing outrage when a parent is abüsive ticks so many more social media boxes.
Luke Branwen 3 months ago
Just look at what's being done in the name of "protecting children". The UK people now have to give extremely sensitive personal data to some shady, hackable databanks to access Wikipedia. Internet anonymity is dead because GOD FORBID a teen sees a bare breast.
Becky Samuel 3 months ago
You can get past it just by using an AI-created virtual 'face'. The character creator of Death Stranding (console game) is good enough to fool the system. The truth is that unless you have no smart gadgets, tvs, phone, Alexa, video doorbell, dashcam, cloud storage, online bank account or any social media presence at all then your data is already out there.
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#3
Recording any “acts of kindness”.
Earonn - 3 months ago
On the fence with this one. Yes, it might be "look at me", but it also normalises being kind. Studies show that people overestimate the level of crime and how many "bad" people are out there because that's what they see in the news and online. If we did it the other way round - promoted those who do good instead of every little fvkcker with a gun - people would tend more to do good themselves because "that's what everyone does". Also, it's a nicer news item or snippet than the latest rap*e you can't do anything about anyway.
Touhou Youyoumu 3 months ago
Have to justify being "kind" use that word with fair amount of sarcasm. Sticking a camera in some poor homeless person face, for internet clout to "normalise" other people to be this kind of "kind" is just vile behaviour.
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BrownEyedGrrl 3 months ago
I worked at a place where you could "adopt" a sick child who was in the hospital at Christmas. I did and wanted to remain anonymous. The organizer said " Don't you want the parents to know who you are so they can send you a thank you card." No, b***h. Don't you think they have enough to worry about? Their little girl died the day after Christmas.
Mir Adwari 3 months ago
That's so sad. Completely agree... they don't need to know who is helping, who it is that cares, just that someone does.
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Missy Moo Moo 3 months ago
100% I carry a purse full of low denomination note and every time I see some who looks homeless, I give them money without them having to ask. And if they ask I give them money too… and if they ask for more, I’ll give them more. I call it my privilege tax. Nobody needs to thank me, I don’t care, I’ll continue regardless.
Array Index Out of Bounds 3 months ago
Being homeless for many years, I know how it is on the streets. That being said, I love helping random homeless folks. I would not post it though.
웅장한 거북이 🇰🇷🇰🇭 3 months ago
To me, that is pretty disgusting. You lower the person even more by filming it
#4
Gender reveals.
Jumping Jellyfishes 3 months ago
Back when I had my kids, gender reveal was the actual birth announcement.
royal crablets 3 months ago
Sure, but when I do it I get arrested for exposing myself at a petting zoo.
#5
Saying “ Thank you for your service.” to veterans. My veteran spouse cringes every time.
Michael Largey 3 months ago (edited)
Thank a veteran by supporting increased veteran benefits.
Uncle Panda 3 months ago (edited)
I was in SEATAC, eating in the food court. Seated alone at a table in my view was a young soldier in uniform. He was trying to eat a big hamburger but every time he lifted it towards his mouth, somebody stomped up, shouted THANKYOUFORYOURSERVICE! and stomped off. After his fourth interruption, he looked over at me like Gilligan's Skipper looked at the camera. All I could do was shrug.
Jesha 3 months ago (edited)
One time, mom and I ran into my veteran uncle. He had his hat on and some other indicators and people straight up got between him and my mom's conversation to thank him for his service. He HATES that. He just kinda went "oh. Yeah." at them. Really, he wore the hat and some other stuff because he knew he looked cute in it and was trying to possibly meet a new guy at the flea market (that regalia like the handkerchief was less obvious) and a goodly portion of the well-wishers would run screaming for the hills if they knew he was g-g-gayyyy oh noooo
Jac Carr 3 months ago
So he was using his military merch to pick up guys but no-one else is supposed to notice he's wearing it?
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turk 3 months ago (edited)
Go ahead and downvote me, but honestly, I don't care for the veterans from the Gulf War (or any of the recent ones). My grandfather was a WWII veteran, and I respected his service. But these younger generation veterans are not the same. They have this "rambo" attitude even when they were parachute packers in the reserves. I can't say all of them are bad. But pretty much every one I work with is and makes for a toxic environment. Worst thing my employer ever did was give preferential treatment to veterans. But it's a tax break. I can't say I respect their service when it seems they only did it to get an opportunity to murder without legal consequences. Respect should be earned.
Zig Zag Wanderer 3 months ago
Too right. I have no problem honouring those who protect us, but this silly American fashion is silly.
#6
Being pro-life while looking down on single mothers and voting for people who pass bills that hurt the lower class to help the uber rich.
Also, any version of “my best friend (cousin, aunt, boyfriend, wife, etc.) is black (Asian, Native American, queer, etc.).”.
Ace 3 months ago
The more they insist on unwanted children being brought into this world, the more struggling single mothers there will be, therefore the more people they have to look down on. The American Dream relies on you being 'better' than someone else, which actually means that they need to ensure there are people worse off than them. It's why even poverty-level rednecks vote for Trump, because at least it means that those people lower down the pecking order will continue to be worse off.
#7
Red hat, USA flag shirt, bumper stickers, eg “these colors don’t run”, shouting “U-S-A!” while charging the capital building in an attempt to overthrow our democracy.
Performative patriotism.
john doe 3 months ago
People don't understand the difference between patriotism and nationalism and it's gonna cause bloodshed.
Michael Largey 3 months ago
Patriotism really isn't about what you say about your country - it's what you do for it. Your country is both your parent and your child. Looking back, it formed you. Looking forward, you must form it.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
I hate those fvckers so much. Every single J6 terrorist should be deported….I don’t care where to. Gitmo, maybe?
Janelle Collard 3 months ago
I hear Alligator Alcatraz is nice this time of year. 😁
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Antoinette the Red 3 months ago
Might as well take the "U" out of U.S.A. because MAGA wants us to be anything but united.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
I refuse to unite with MAGAts. And that’s on THEM.
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Nikki Sevven 3 months ago
The so-called confederate flag is the flag flown by (one small portion of) a bunch of traitors...who wanted to overthrow the government so they could own people. Full stop.
Drop Bear from Hell 3 months ago
I'm not American but have a bumper sticker that reads 'Elect a clown, expect a circus'....and what a clown has been elected......
#8
People who post themselves giving stuff to homeless people on SM. It is so exploitative.
StrangeOne 3 months ago
I hate it when they shove a camera in a homeless person's face. Some homeless people do have jobs, and a family. They may not be openly homeless. There is a conflicting mentality of pride and humiliation they're going through. Do a good deed, sure. But there's not reason to film it.
Anne Roberts 3 months ago
Just do it because it is the kind thing to do. Needing applause for it spoils the whole purpose
Brazen 3 months ago
I think for most of them it is, but there is this one guy that said without getting paid from the videos he couldn't continue to do it. He really helps though; not just giving money or clothing, he helps people get off the street by getting them into apartments (by paying a few months rent in advance) and sometimes even helps getting them work.
Becky Samuel 3 months ago
This is an issue of consent. And even with their consent, can anyone truly give consent when there is such a huge power imbalance?
Load More Replies... #9
Pretending they were close to someone once they die. That performative "she lit up the room and I miss her everyday" when they hadn't spoken in 30 years and only then in passing is 100% BS. They probably bullied them in high school too.
Becky Samuel 3 months ago
I know this is dark, but how come every single child that dies was 'a beautiful angel who lit up the room'? It must be a very cruel irony that none if them are unbearable little shíts.
Amanduh 3 months ago
Only the good die young: God leaves the insufferables for us to deal with. Grow old & be equally miserable with 😹
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Jorie 3 months ago
I'd like to read a truthful obit occasionally. Like, "the guy was a slob who cheated on his wife for years". Or, "the kid was a selfish little brat that nobody could stand". How about, "the only time she lit up a room was when she turned the lamp on".
For All Pedernity 3 months ago
My first teacher in elementary school, from 1st to 3rd grade, absolutely hated me and did all she could to make my school days miserable. She recently died and I was SO tempted to leave a truthful little tribute on her memorial page. Everyone else were like 'you were such a sweet person, great teacher, warm and caring...'. I regret not doing it now.
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K 3 months ago
This! It was so crazy to see this one time someone's family member passed, family friends offered to do the "memory video/picture slide" called all friends and family to view said "final" video, and it was the passed family member with only photos of them with the family friends none with the actual family. Unbelievable to say the least.
CorgiButts 3 months ago
I try not to speak ill of the dead...what's the point? But that doesn't mean I suddenly speak well of them either...a holes dont redeem themselves by dying.
Poppy 3 months ago
My maternal grandmother was a right royal pain in the backside. She allowed my mother to grow up in squalor and was denied food and other horrific things. They had a better relationship as adults however it was at arms length. When my grandmother finally passed away the obituary said 'Beloved Mother and Grandmother' and my sister and I were laughing at that and saying what absolute b******t that was but no one was brave enough to put 'barely tolerated at best' in the obiturary.
#10
Literally everything related to being an "alpha". Everyone knows they are absolutely, embarrassingly desperate for attention, for affection. They're so deeply alone.
Luke Branwen 3 months ago
Alpha male is like alpha software: unstable, full of issues, unfit for public release.
john doe 3 months ago
No man is an island. the alpha male s**t isn't even based on reality. The researcher observed wolf packs and coined the prashe layer disavowed his findings because wolves don't actually have an alpha leader of a pack, rather it's a rotational hierarchy that can be very fluid and cross s*x.
Novlette Williams 3 months ago
The funny thing about real alphas? Their job is to protect the weakest members of the group. To nutrure and care for them.
Julia Mckinney 3 months ago
Hey! Can I post that I'm an Alpha bookworm? I have a lot of books!
Michael Largey 3 months ago
If a man really was an alpha, he wouldn't need to tell you. In fact, he probably wouldn't even know it because he wouldn't think in those terms.
Anne Roberts 3 months ago
I recently heard the phrase , "a good guy doesn't need to tell you he's a good guy". The same goes for being wealthy, intelligent, kind, etc. If you are such a person people will already know.
#11
Like 95% of posts on r/advice or r/amitheasshole or r/amioverreacting or any of the other seemingly dozens of similar subs.
“My husband sent d**k pics to another woman and blew our $50,000 savings in gambling last month should I think about divorce ?”
“AITA for calling the cops on my mom after she drank an entire bottle of whiskey and threw it at my head then shot my dog and said ‘you’re next’?”
“I went out on a date with a woman and she asked me for $10,000 to bail her uncle out of a Nigerian prison and I said no. She got upset so I left the date and haven’t texted to her in 12 hours. AIO?”
…you get the point. Much of it is probably made up or heavily exaggerated because people get off on any attention they can get.
Daniel Atkins 3 months ago
How did this slip by BP this is like most of the posts for one day not to mention how similar post will be posted the next day. Don't give away the formula. ;) I wonder how many are fiction or only tell one side of the story in a favorable light. ie downplay faults the poster has that might have cause the situation.
Load More Replies... Touhou Youyoumu 3 months ago
This is my problem with AITA. Most are clear cut, or just don't need put up on the net. Some are way beyond internet strangers opinions.
πφ 𝐌𝐨𝐨𝐧𝐣𝐚𝐲 3 months ago
and they always include their age and gender- "i (58M) just killed a family of 4, AITA?" buddy WE DONT NEED TO KNOW YOUR AGE AND GENDER. ITS NOT RELEVANT. AGH
Jude Corrigan 3 months ago (edited)
For some posts it is. For example, someone who was the only male child being treated differently to his sisters or a woman's bisexual wife who slept in the same bed as her heterosexual male friend.
Load More Replies... #12
Posting gym selfies with just trying to stay healthy in the caption.
Hassel Davidhoff 3 months ago
I don't think it will, as long as we have cameras and social media. I hope I'm wrong though.
Load More Replies... #13
Performative SM posts about how wonderful their marriage is. I believe they've actually done studies on this - the more someone posts about their perfect marriage or family, it actually means the relationship is unstable.
Maleficent_Phase_698:
I have a (sad) story!
A girl I went to HS with always posts about her amazing husband and their amazing life with their kids.
Well one day I guess she got fed up and posted the truth and then deleted it 2 minutes later.
Her post was a screenshot of texts that she had sent to her deceased father’s phone. Among the “Dad I miss you” messages she would send “I’m scared of this man. He beats me worse now that you’re gone. He won’t let me get on birth control. He won’t let me work. He says that if I try to leave he’ll k**l the kids and then me. I hate him”. And then poof the post was gone.
She just has their 4th kid a few months ago. She still talks about how perfect her life is. Social media is a lie.
KatWitch57 3 months ago
Sounds as though he's controlling her posts too, and she needs help getting out of there.
SweetCheesySpaghetti 3 months ago
My cousin continuously posted about how amazing and perfect her boyfriend was. Her last SM post was about how perfect he was. He m******d her less than a month later.
The Majestic Opossum 3 months ago
😂 Would be much more interesting I suppose...
Load More Replies... StrangeOne 3 months ago
The proof is definitely when they start going from groveling each other in posts, to arguing and then raging, and then profusely apologizing. It's like reading a soap opera script.
#14
Bowing their head and raising their arms in the sky as they pray. It's not for their soul that they're doing this, it's to show everyone else how pious they are. You can pray silently, without any external shenanigans, but no, they have to make a show of it.
Jesha 3 months ago
It's not for everyone (I'm sorry at how cliche this sounds). A lot of people do it to celebrate a community, for better or for worse. Lots of us do it privately. Tons do it for selfish reasons, though, and the church institutions are complicit in using it to make money. It is, after all, one of the easiest ways to manipulate someone.
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Anne Roberts 3 months ago (edited)
Rather like when Trump has photo ops with these "faith leaders" touching him and praying with/for him. It's a wonder he doesn't burst into flames
SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
Those are the same people who perform exaggerated patriotism every day.
Crissy Newbury 3 months ago
Why even pray? It’s meaningless. Unless you like talking to yourself.
Michael Largey 3 months ago
"How did I realize that I was God? When I prayed, I found I was talking to myself." - The Ruling Class
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Nikki Sevven 3 months ago
My grandfather was a devout Roman Catholic. Church every Sunday and holy day. When he wanted to pray—outside of church services—he went into his room and shut the door. I once asked him why. He told me that people should be praying in private, not public. He was right.
Matt from Canada 3 months ago
All fun and games until someone substitutes religion for another controversial opinion. Lets pick Pride Parades. "You can be LGBT silently, without any external shenanigans, they don't have to make a show of it".
Rinso The Red 3 months ago
Fair, but when you've been told to be ashamed of something over which you have no control (being gay for example), it's not surprising that the retaliation is overt pride.
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#15
Talk about how much they read or understand the bible. Tons of people do this (be it in person or on media) and it's clearly performative. I am a retired biblical scholar and professor of religious studies and, trust me, most clearly don't know the bible as well as they claim to.
Luke Branwen 3 months ago
A HUGE portion of the Bible has been lost in translation. That Leviticus verse conservatives love because it condemns homosexuality? Most probably, it actually condemns p3dophilia (says that a man shouldn't lie with a BOY, not another man). Sodoma and Gommorah weren't destroyed because of loose s3xual morals, but because they refused to care for the foreigners in need. There's originally no mention whatsoever that Maria Magdalena was a prostitute. And the list goes on.
Crissy Newbury 3 months ago
The bible is just a bunch of fairytales written by ignorant Bronze Age goat herders then taken by the big wigs as a sign to wield power over the masses.
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HeavyMetalHeart 3 months ago
I’ve read the bible. It was a big part of why I became an atheist.
General Anaesthesia 3 months ago (edited)
The Old Testament describes the world that all the plagues, famines, floods that God put them through didn't work, mankind was doomed. So, God sent his only son as His last effort, to preach love thy neighbor as thyself, do unto others as you would have them do unto you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God. After that part, after the crucifixion, the Church's corporate interests take over the New Testament, written by and for men. So, where is the Bible not a work of fiction, oppression?
UKGrandad 3 months ago (edited)
And yet despite not understanding any of it they'll cherry-pick a handful of verses and use them as the blueprint for their lives, or as reasons to look down on others. Then there are those who will come out with quotes that aren't even in the Bible - 'the Lord moves in mysterious ways' and 'God doesn't give us more than we can bear', for example - when terrible things happen and they need to pretend it's all part of their god's greater scheme for ultimate good because they can't face the alternative: that shít happens and their god of choice is powerless to prevent it by dint of not existing.
Michael Largey 3 months ago
Too much of the Old Testament is a compilation of mere tribal customs and taboos being presented as a God's will. It forbids eating shellfish and wearing clothes made of two different fabrics, but no Christian takes that seriously. It's the "God hates gays" stuff that they focus on.
Mel Colley 3 months ago
As kid, many years ago, I used to go to Sunday school, and I remember perusing the bible and thinking there is no way anyone can read this from back to front; cause it was so boring!
Saltypepper 3 months ago
I admit 100% I don't know or even understand the Bible it's confusing as all hell and don't pretend to know anything about it ,I know a few verses
Jac Carr 3 months ago (edited)
I don't believe in the bible which means I have to know it inside out in order to defend my point of view; it's stunning that most "Christians" have no idea what it says other than the pretty parables told at Sunday school. Even more stunning is that they only know the Good Samaritan or fish & bread parables yet don't want to help people in any way, especially by feeding the poor
#16
Anything on LinkedIn.
sketchthrowaway999:
LinkedIn is so fake it makes me break out in hives. The cringe is off the charts.
Luke Branwen 3 months ago
"My two-years-old son asked me for a lollipop. I sat him down and explained that nothing in life is free and it only rewards those who dedicate their life to hard work and hustle. After two weeks of doing chores in the house, I didn't buy the lollipop and told him that his feeling of a job well done should be enough reward on its own. My son burst into tears, hugged me and thanked me for setting him on the right path in life. Here's 7 ways how this story can inspire your business."
James016 3 months ago
LinkedIn is the cringiest platform currently in existence. I feel dirty having an account on there but a friend of mine who works in HR systems was telling me a lot of companies really look at LinkedIn profiles as part of the process.
Margaret Wartime 3 months ago
It’s the only reason I have a LinkedIn account too. I don’t even use the site lol I just update my profile every once in a while and leave it.
Load More Replies... Robert Beveridge 3 months ago
I killed my LinkedIn account in 2008, when it had become nothing but a morass of idiot recruiters. So glad I missed this evolution.
Upstaged75 3 months ago
I refuse to have an account on that site. Don't care if it keeps me from getting certain jobs.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
I’m considering making a fake, rogue LinkedIn account after I retire, and posting snark just to mess with people. 😈
#17
Post about how selfless and charitable they are on social media.
Knobbyknees1983:
Slacktivism. Looking like you’re doing something without actually doing anything.
Zig Zag Wanderer 3 months ago
I've taken it to the next level. I don't try to look like I'm doing anything, while not doing anything.
Little Bit 3 months ago
At a charity even in my local area, the organisers wanted to take a group photo of all the participants. It made me wonder how many people were there to genuinely help the charity and how many were there just because they wanted a few likes on social media.
#18
A lot (not all), but a lot of church going folk are in it for the appearance.
Glen Ellyn 3 months ago
Ever notice how most of the congregation looks really bored during services?
SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
I cannot upvote this enough. And the bigger and more conservative the church, the more performative the attendees are.
Jude Corrigan 3 months ago (edited)
A lot of churches are there for the money but hide behind being pious.
Array Index Out of Bounds 3 months ago
My dad never dresses up for church. He just wears a random t-shirt while everyone else is wearing their "Sunday Best".
#19
Pretending to be offended by language that was acceptable in the recent past. I'm thinking things like handicapped instead of disabled, homeless instead of unhoused, Black/African American instead of Person of Color (I know that POC encompasses multiple races/identities, but in common use it often just refers to black/AA), and so on.
Ronnie Beaton 3 months ago
The recent furore over the use of an apparently derogatory term for an indigenous African tribe in Mary Poppins is a prime example. That's a film made in 1964, which is based upon a series of novels first published in 1934, which are in turn set in the early 1900s. And when someone actually thought to ask members of the tribe in question if they were offended by it, the answer was a resounding no.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
Maybe it would be best to ask the person in question what term they prefer (if you need to know), and then use that term. 🤔
Michael Largey 3 months ago (edited)
"Pretending to be offended" How about people who are actually offended or - more commonly - think we can do better? Right or wrong, they do exist. I will freely stipulate that progress in terminology is an uneven process, and not all attempted improvements turn out better or more helpful than the previous term. Some come off as mere well-intended silliness. But I am more concerned about the drift to derogatory terms, like a US president who quite openly calls nations of a different color as "s**t-hole countries" and is still returned to office.
Asri 3 months ago
I grew up using colored person, which was the polite phrase versus... you know. Now we've come back around in a slightly different form.
Load More Replies... Uncle Panda 3 months ago
"I don't recognize your authority to tell me how to speak. Do it again, and I'll show you you are nothing more than a low rent Internet bully with nothing better to do."
James016 3 months ago
Something in this area is people who insist on the term "person with autism" is used instead of autistic as they feel autistic as a term is wrong or offensive. Most autistics prefer "autistic rather than "person with autism" as the latter implies that autism is not part of them but an illness like a cold or flu.
Marnie 3 months ago
"Person of Color" really gets to me. It's such a stupid phrase in so many ways. And being on the older side, it reminds of "colored people". It means THE EXACT SAME THING. "Green shirt" or "shirt of green" mean the identical thing. And "colored people" was not a polite phrase back in the day. And it's even more stupid than the non-sensical "Black people", but at least that is slight more well-defined. Also, unhoused should never be considered a replacement for homeless. They mean two different things. Well "unhoused" is a subset of "homeless". "Unhoused" means you're literally on the street (in your car, outside). You don't have a physical building in which to reside. But "homeless" means you don't have your own home. So, someone who is currently staying in a shelter or someone who is crashing on a friend's couch is "homeless" but not "unhoused".
Ace 3 months ago
I always find it odd when someone is described as 'homeless' but is actually living in their car. Yes, technically correct, but to me "homeless" always refers to people literally sleeping on the street or in shelters if they're lucky. (Note, I'm not suggesting a definition, just what the word conjures up for me).
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#20
Making people return to the office.
It is being done solely to present a certain image without adding any real value. That is how I interpret the word “performative.”
Fungus John 3 months ago (edited)
No, it is solely being done because of the billions of dollars of commercial real estate that these businesses have their money in.
Rick Murray 3 months ago
And managers s**t scared of losing their jobs if the C suite realised that most people, given solid targets, can work on their own and thus don't need layers of management getting in the way calling those stupid standing-desk meetings just to "touch base" (and by consequence making everybody else less productive).
Load More Replies... SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
This is another one that makes me furious with the heat of 10,000 suns. OK, fine. I’ll come to the office. And then I’ll go out and come back several times during the day, so I can get stuff done that really matters. You can make me come in to the office; you can’t make me stay there all day.
Drop Bear from Hell 3 months ago
And the impact on local businesses (think coffee shops, restaurants) who have lost business with a heavily decreased clientele.
Mir Adwari 3 months ago
How about learning new ways? "We've always done it this way" is never a reason to carry on doing it. If some people can work well from home then why not? Change is inevitable and a some of it is good. Keep up or stay behind.
Load More Replies... #21
People who say they support the troops and then vote for Republicans.
Nikki Sevven 3 months ago
They actually love the idea that they can control a large, well-equipped military. They give zero shîts for the people serving.
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Duane Ringlein 3 months ago
Republican love for the military is only words, their actions show on their lack of support for veterans. The first vote on the PACT act in the senate not a single republican voted for it. It passed on a later vote when they realized how bad it looked for them.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
People who vote Republican. There, I fixed it for you.
#22
Humblebragging. Even when it seems natural, people still want to look as intelligent and competent as possible.
Plentyofoomph 3 months ago
Sometimes I like to use big, fancy words to make myself appear smarter. It doesn't always work, but sometimes it really isosceles.
Load More Replies... #23
Rev their motorcycles at any point when they're not in motion. It's fun and sounds cool but does nothing for the intended purpose of the bike. I say this as someone who revs it a couple times anytime I start my bike, just for fun.
Marnie 3 months ago
It does NOT sound cool. It sounds like an engine, something most of us have heard countless times in our lives.
john doe 3 months ago
If you like riding a motorcycle fine, but they make ones that aren't loud as hell and p**s everyone off, but you chose a loud one? Fu ck you then!
The Majestic Opossum 3 months ago
Funny, that's exactly what we say to cars when they almost k**l us in traffic because they have no idea we're there because they can't hear or see us.
Load More Replies...
Upstaged75 3 months ago
One of my neighbors has a guest who keeps illegally parking a motorcycle and then revving the sh!t out of it in the middle of the night. The first time it was 3am and I thought it was a helicopter or something. Total a-hole.
Knucklehead 3 months ago
You throttle up to hear the engine to make sure there's no funny sounds. You can also throttle up to get someone's attention, only a no-nothing newbie throttles up for the thrill.
Steph Walther 3 months ago
Motorcyclists may rev their engines for various reasons, including maintaining proper engine function, signaling their presence, practicing rev-matching, or simply enjoying the sound and feel of the motorcycle. Some older or high-performance motorcycles may also require occasional revving to prevent stalling due to carburetor or cam timing issues. Additionally, some riders may rev their engines as a way to be more visible to other road users. (-Gemini)
#24
Prayer circles. Folks gathering around in a huddle and invoking God for victory of some kind. Common in the southern US.
The Bible explicitly says prayer is meant to kept private.
Rick Murray 3 months ago
The Bible explicitly says...no no no, you're not supposed to actually read it. You're supposed to pick certain phrases, strip them of context, then distort them to mean whatever you want them to mean to support whatever it is you're angry about today.
Dolly_of TheCowboy 2 months ago
Just don't covet your neighbour's derriere while doing it XD
Load More Replies... Dolly_of TheCowboy 2 months ago
I hate Zoom/teams meetings... "I can hear someone...did someone want to speak?"
Load More Replies... 웅장한 거북이 🇰🇷🇰🇭 3 months ago
The US interpretation of christianity sounds more and more like a cult to me. All the things i read about god this and god that and praying for this and that. We have a lot of christians in my coutry, too. Nobody is doing that here, if you would, people would think you are completely crazy. You keep your religious life to yourself. It is no problem to mention you are catholic or buddhist but you do not annoy people with your beliefs and why they are roght and everybody else is wrong. Had to work with a guy who was like this for a while, everybody thought he is an idiot.
Jesha 3 months ago
The churches as institutions realized something that's gone down through history: it is VERY easy to manipulate someone through their faith and through the human need for community. That goes down even more easily if you've been indoctrinated into something as a child and compelled to stay with throughout your life. After all, that's how you get donations! Parishioners are just repeat customers! You're a bad person if you branch out! I could go on.
Load More Replies... Zena 3 months ago
As a monk, he would (should) have been voluntarily celibate, which would make him a cel, not an incel.
Load More Replies... #25
Talking on their smartphone in the grocery store like it's a pizza slice.
chickpea me 3 months ago
Could anyone please explain why this is even a thing and why people do it? I don’t remember anyone doing this with the horn of a traditional phone where you had a button to put it on speaker so you could call hands-free or let others hear what was talked about.
Rick Murray 3 months ago
They probably saw "alpha male" types doing it on TV. It happens a lot on programmes like "The Apprentice". All that clever noise cancelling technology rendered useless because some tw@t wants to show his inate godliness by laying his phone flat on his hand in speaker mode and then shouting at it.
Load More Replies... Zena 3 months ago
Annoying? 100%. But how is it performative? Is it too late for me to post: "Pretending to understand the meaning of the term 'performative' and posting random s**t"?
UKGrandad 3 months ago (edited)
The performative part is the balancing of the phone on the palm - or increasingly commonly on the tips of the fingers - with the call on loudspeaker so everybody around is forced to hear both sides of the conversation. If they have a hand free to hold the phone, why not just hold it to the side of the face and have a normal phone conversation?
Load More Replies... SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
It’s inconsiderate, but I’m not sure it’s performative. Social customs have changed to the point where nobody does anything quietly or privately anymore; everything has to be loud and public.
Michael Largey 3 months ago (edited)
Err.. how would a person speak to a pizza slice? My relationship with pizza slices is indeed oral, but not conversational.
Glen Ellyn 3 months ago
This gave me a good laugh. I'll probably laugh every time I see someone "eating their pizza." 🍕
Hassel Davidhoff 3 months ago
I have to use my phone on speaker mode, doctor's orders. I don't balance it in my palm though, what's with that?
The Majestic Opossum 3 months ago
This drives me nuts! But I'll admit that I talk like this in private. I wear makeup on my face and I was tired of getting my phone screen even dirtier and having to wipe c**p off of it when I held it to my ear... It also helped me stop breaking out on that one freaking part of my face.
Russell Rieckenberg 3 months ago
A pizza slice? I always thought it looked like they were eating raw oysters.
#26
Weddings. It's the marriage that's important. A wedding is just an excuse for a party.
john doe 3 months ago
My wife and I had a court house marrgie, but we got a nice cake! Never pass up an opportunity for good cake lol
Load More Replies... Crissy Newbury 3 months ago
Also engagements, christenings, gender reveal, birthday parties for one year-olds. Absolute ridiculousness.
HeavyMetalHeart 3 months ago
And our wedding party was lovely. All our favourite people came together and showered us with love for a day. I used to be unenthusiastic about weddings, but I’m really glad we did it.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
I dunno. I like going to other peoples’ weddings. Just think I’d have a quiet courthouse wedding myself, if I remarry.
Little Bit 3 months ago
I hate extravagant show off weddings. I literally know people who try to outdo each other with the most expensive venue, the most expensive food, the most expensive wedding dress, the most expensive car. And all of it to get those all important likes on social media. The best weddings I have been to are the ones with a simple ceremony at the local church or registry office followed by a reception at the local pub/club/church hall.
#27
I hate to say it, but sometimes DEI efforts feel performative. When companies focus more on showcasing diversity stats, like how many languages are spoken, instead of valuing people for their actual strengths, it misses the point. It ends up feeling like they’re using employees as tokens, and that does everyone a disservice.
Don Adams 3 months ago
In the good, old days, it was Tokenism. "We are a progressive company. We have three Negroes and four women working in our office". Hiring should be based on skills and experience, not the skin color, gender or religion.
Load More Replies... Glen Ellyn 3 months ago
Real actions speak louder than all the back-patting we see these days.
Jesha 3 months ago
My friend made good money being the friendly black face of a local college for at LEAST ten years. We gave him so much s**t about it whenever we'd see one of his billboards. He's quite happy with how that clout helped him to get into an amazing career in teaching and how much he got paid to be the smiling face on my pop-up ads. He's handsome and very kind and you can see it in his face, and it's a very excellent action shot of him giving a presentation in class, so the whole thing worked out great. Plus it makes me smile to occasionally see a bus with him on it because I love him very much.
Squirrel Chaser 3 months ago (edited)
Diversity for diversties sake is simply bad for business.
Plentyofoomph 3 months ago
Well, this one actually is performative. It's the company showing that they're not going to engage in discrimination, and that they're actually working towards addressing past issues.
Earonn - 3 months ago
Oh yes, these horrilbe "DEI hires"! How about we have a look at how many white, straight men are actually good enough for their positions? But the DEI-whiners are never suggesting that. Wonder why.
Bur* 3 months ago
I'm pretty sure OP did not say DEI was in anyway a bad idea, just that the way it is carried out seems to be companies patting themselves on the back for having a rainbow of characters and putting them on display, rather than think of these people as real employees. Everyone everywhere who works under an incompetent white men talk about it ALL THE TIME.
Load More Replies... #28
Posting a picture of themselves in the ER or hospital but with no other information whatsoever.
Upstaged75 3 months ago
Anytime I've been in the hospital I've looked awful. Why would I post that??
Canuck 3 months ago
Posting a pic of their family ,ember in a hospital bed without their permission. It is disgusting disrespectful behavior. I saw a photo of a dying grandfather. His devastated wife resting her head on the bed. What does the granddaughter do. She sneeks a pic and posts it. If you do stuff like this you have no morals at all. You are a piece of trash.
Jude Corrigan 3 months ago
In the UK, some people do this and wait for all the comments to be posted showing concern. Then they either answer only one person by saying, 'Oh, it's private. I don't want to post on here.' Or a very small amount of people respond and they post an update to their 'many followers'.
#29
Speaking in tongues.
radrax:
I used to think this was fake when I saw videos of it until I met my spouse. He was raised in an ultra religious household and they would "speak in tongues" at their church. Both he and his sister told me its all faking it, and they would keep doing it as kids because it got them praise.
Marnie 3 months ago
This makes no sense. "I used to think this was fake when I saw videos of it until I met my spouse". But the spouse said they were faking it, so why did radrax only think it was fake up until they met their spouse?
Ace 3 months ago
I think they meant that they didn't believe that anyone would actually do it, that it was just a p**s-take, a wind-up, a fake by the person telling them the stories. Then they realised that people really did it, but of course that those who do so are themselves faking it.
Load More Replies... Jesha 3 months ago
What is it called when a group of people starts freaking out and acting in a certain way because it's expected of them? Something hallucination?
Jac Carr 3 months ago
I was standing next to my childhood best friend at her dad's church when she and others started speaking in tongues. They were absolutely not just spewing goggldegook, you could tell it was a language but a language that is not taught & I knew my friend only spoke English because we had the same education. I don't doubt that kids fake it and the adults would have known, they just probably thought it was funny - you try speaking absolute rubbish for 20 minutes using no words from a known language without it being obvious you're just making random sounds; not possible
#30
Telling people how good a person they are, always helping others, homeless, the hungry etc right up until the camera is off. After that they don´t care, No more likes to be had.
#31
Saying " no offense intended".
Narrator: Offense was, in fact, intended.
Little Bit 3 months ago
When people start a sentence with, "no offence, but..." or, "with respect..." you just know they're going to say the most insulting and disrespectful thing possible.
웅장한 거북이 🇰🇷🇰🇭 3 months ago
This is my favourite. I learned quite recently what it actually means, i allways thought it is nice 😂
Load More Replies... Margaret Wartime 3 months ago (edited)
On the other hand, I do think it’s hilarious when people start an insulting sentence with “disrespectfully…..” (as in, “disrespectfully, you’re a moron.”
Ellinor she/they/elle 3 months ago
Like Jon Snow said : Everything before the world "but" is horsesh!t.
Michael Largey 3 months ago
People who say "I'm sorry, but .." should hike their sorry butt out of the room.
Load More Replies... 
#32
Saying "I'll pray for you"
Ok, and I'll think for you.
Don Adams 3 months ago
Please remember that for some people, offering their prayers for is a sincere (to them) gesture or care and concern. Don't mock them to their face, even if you don't believe that way. Accept it as the kind gesture and compliment they intend it to be.
Jesha 3 months ago
It really is the same thing as thinking for them in this context. I'm thinking of someone I love and sending well wishes and trying to filter through my thoughts in a conversational way in order to try and find some way to help them.
Load More Replies... LuLuBelle 3 months ago
When customers at work tell me to have a blessed day, I like to flip them the horns and tell them Hail Satan. No, I am not a Satanist. But I'm not a Christian either, and Christians assuming that everyone else is a Christian too annoy the Hell out of me, literally. We live in a secular nation. Keep your religion to yourself, if I want to know I'll ask.
#33
There’s a certain type of person whose favorite phrase is “I’m so weird!”. They are generally not at all weird, but they have for some reason landed on that as their preferred personality and continue to insist on it rather than letting their actions and interests speak for themselves.
Ace 3 months ago
" You're all different!". . . ."Yes, we are all different!" . . . . " I'm not."
Lady Eowyn 3 months ago
I'm often described as weird, and it doesn't bother me, but I'm just me.
Jac Carr 3 months ago
Agree. I've always been an introvert and socially awkward so in conversation with close friends, I tell them that it's ok to call me a weirdo when joking around because it is true that I'm a bit odd compared to most people and it doesn't bother me. I do not however announce to the world that I'm weird, for attention or any other reason.
#34
Posting on social media on mother's day/father's day/other holidays about how much they appreciate certain person, when that person is not even on that social media.
tiltedwater:
happy 98th birthday grandma! thanks for being the best grandma! love you!
MisfitAsAFiddle:
It means so much more to me when people send me a text on my birthday. And it’s almost hurtful when my close friends/family post on social media but DON’T call/text me directly. It’s like who is this really for?
Jac Carr 3 months ago
Someone said to me last week that they didn't realise my dad, mum and sister had all died in the past 4 years because they didn't see anything on social media about it. Not so gently reminded her that because I didn't trawl for sympathy, it doesn't mean they didn't actually die
#35
Most of Hollywood's version of "method acting."
It's a complete bastardization of anything taught in classical acting training.
The idea that you have to personally experience every physical experience that your character does is pretty much the opposite of the foundations of acting.
It's just the stupid cliché of suffering for art.
If you have to physically or psychologically t*****e yourself in order to do your job, maybe you're not good at it...
UKGrandad 3 months ago
Dustin Hoffman was once on a chat show telling all about the lengths he had gone to in order to get his character in 'The Marathon Man' just right. When he'd finished, his fellow guest, the great Sir John Gielgud, touched his arm and said 'My dear boy, why don't you try acting"?
Daniel Atkins 3 months ago
It is one thing to shadow a carpenter to learn how the tool is used so you don't look like a moron in the movie, but it is another thing to do like it Daniel Day Lewis. Only responding to Mr. President while filming Lincoln. He sounds like he is insufferable to be around while filming movies. He is talented but man that is too much.
Touhou Youyoumu 3 months ago
Great example Robert De Niro one of the best method actors, great guy on and off the screen. Definitely extremely bad examples though.
#36
Influencers uploading a public apology.
Michael Largey 3 months ago
Influencers endorsing things when have been bribed to do so. "Collaberations."
#37
Pretend to wash their hands, it is really disgusting, running them under water for 5 seconds is not washing your hands.
Glen Ellyn 3 months ago
I call it the "splash & dash." It's a complete waste of water because they accomplished nothing!
Nikki Sevven 3 months ago
I was recently in a public restroom. The woman in the next stall finished before me, noisily smacked the soap dispenser button, ran the water for about 10 seconds, the ran the dryer for 5 seconds and left. I really hope she wasn't an employee, as this was in a bar/restaurant.
#38
I work at a coffee shop and have customers come in who will fight over who’s paying for the drinks (like literally clambering over each other/play fighting at the register), and then they don’t leave a tip….
That grand display of generosity, and then…. Nada…
:(.
Tomato Smudge 3 months ago
I've yelled at a couple for doing this. Telling them the line's already long and I'm gonna pick the closest if they can't decide right away.
Ronnie Beaton 3 months ago
Billy Connolly does a routine about this. Groups of harmless looking elderly ladies all but coming to blows over whose turn it is to pay for their tea and cakes.
#39
Anniversary WEEK posts! Every one filled with posed pictures like the wife is posing for GQ and that hubby is some high power CEO. Neither of which are the case. So many references to how much the vacation cost without putting dollar amounts in but referring things like the Sky Lounge, our private dinner, our private pool. If it’s so private please keep it that way! Say happy anniversary on social media but honestly none of us want to look at your entire vacation.
#41
Instagrammable protest. I get the desire to be around like-minded folk when you feel powerless—and I’ve attended my share of marches and actions over the years—but the whole Let’s-make-a-clever-sign-and-hope-it-goes-viral thing is more about self-promotion than being down with the cause. The most vital work is being done far away from social media.
officialsmolkid:
Going to protests and saying they’ve done the work. If you really want change, start attending your local town hall and city council meetings. That is where the real action starts. Organizing with people locally to enact change is a better form of protest. Working with the folks you organize with to learn about your local and state government is a great way to make huge waves of change.
Margaret Wartime 3 months ago
The revolution will not be televised. The revolution will not be on social media.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
The second comment is spot on. Go to your legislators’ offices in person. Try to get a group together. Be polite and civilized, but go in person.
#42
Post your wonderful life on social networks in general.
Stephanie Did It 3 months ago
Someone will mention an event and I'll say oh, I didn't know you did that, and the response is always, "But I posted it on Facebook! Didn't you see the 30 pictures?" No, because I shouldn't have to read it on the internet when you could have just communicated with me. Nobody talks anymore.
Ellinor she/they/elle 3 months ago
I like seeing people's "perfect" life on social media because I know I will never live it. So I watch people who travel, who go to night-clubs, who eat amazing food... That way I can see the world without actually having to move or pay anything (that's why I love rich people's travel vlogs).
#43
Hating pineapple on pizza.
Ellinor she/they/elle 3 months ago
It's actually really good (especially on chicken pizza) and I'm tired of hiding it.
Michael Largey 3 months ago
I revulse at the thought of pineapple on pizza, but then I remember that I have had some delicious "desert pizzas" where pineapple was the main topping.
Robert Beveridge 3 months ago
All the anti pineapple kids gotta come to A Slice Above in Middleburg Heights, OH. They got so tired of the pineapple debate they added mandarin orange to their pineapple pizza. Genius. (Then you get into Aussie and Japanese toppings...you haven't lived till you've had a good tuna, sweet corn, and onion slice.)
#44
Sharing political content on social media and acting like that makes you politically active or aware, when you've done little to nothing in your day-to-day life to make a difference.
Luke Branwen 3 months ago
I disagree. Unapologetically taking a stance in the world full of "I'm not political, both sides are equally bad ¯\_(ツ)_/¯" people is also an act of defiance. Even a social media post can do a lot - inform other people who are on the verge. Show marginalized minorities you're a safe person to be around. Show those who thrive on complacency that you refuse to be complacent.
Becky Samuel 3 months ago
It doesn't seem to be working. The internet has millions of commenters bleating about how much they care, but nobody appears to actually be doing anything.
Load More Replies... Lady Eowyn 3 months ago
I vote. I contact my congresspeople. That's about all I can do at this point in my life.
sock man 3 months ago
I gave up in government class 36 years ago when I learned how it "worked "
Load More Replies... 
#45
Being offended and posting about issues they have no real grasp on for the sake of virtue signaling.
Michael Largey 3 months ago (edited)
Would the OP be offended by people who consider that his post might be an example?
#46
In my mostly suburban town, a bunch of people want to get chickens and act all farm-life but don’t do the research or proper prep and their chickens get eaten by hawks or coyotes. So then they move onto sourdough. Every. Time.
#47
Vow renewals. I know when a celebrity does it, the divorce announcement won’t be long.
Blue Bunny of Happiness 3 months ago
My parents always said they didn’t need vow renewals as they hadn’t broken any.
Michael Largey 3 months ago
A couple renews its vows by living them Nothing else really counts.
#48
Everything Mr Beast did/does.
#49
Every meeting in corporate America.
Marnie 3 months ago
What is "corporate America"? I'm a software developer. We have meetings that are quite productive.
Margaret Wartime 3 months ago (edited)
I work in “corporate Canada” lol, and our meetings are ridiculous. I’m actually in one right now 😂 90 minutes that doesn’t have anything to do with me but I was asked to sit in just in case I have input. The first 20-30 mins are spent going around the table sharing personal and professional good news. I’m too busy for this 😂 (as you can tell from me scrolling on BP instead of listening)
Load More Replies... #50
Posting their significant others or children and gushing about how much they love them all the time.
#51
Raising awareness - when you really whittle it down, it would’ve benefited the charity and the affected a lot more if you just didn’t do the performance of helping/raise awareness and instead just provided them directly with whatever they needed. Correcting someone to say unhoused instead of homeless does nothing. Call them the N word for all I care - HELP THEM WITH THEIR LIVING SITUATION.
#52
Saying “just my opinion” after stating something they *clearly believe to be true*.
It’s a performance of humility, not the real thing. A way to avoid accountability while still asserting a worldview. We’ve confused expressing belief with needing to soften it for social approval.
Real humility isn’t saying “just my opinion.” It’s *asking* better questions, letting go of the need to appear certain, and being willing to be transformed mid-sentence.
But most people don’t want transformation. They want applause that looks like tolerance.
Michael Largey 3 months ago
Aren't your opinions by definition statements you believe to be true?
#53
I work with a gal who, after she obviously sneezes, she makes a high pitched, ultra girly "achoo" noise. It drives me bananas 😅.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
She may not be able to help it. Can people control how their sneezes sound?
Tiffany Munday 3 months ago
My cousin does that in a Betty Boop pitch. Drives me crazy and sounds really quite childish.
#54
Reddit commenters lol.
Every single one of you (including me) will dogpile the obvious “bad take” because you want to feel superior over someone else who’s worse at life than you are.
The best part is how smugly it’s done while you’re kicking someone down.
#55
Most people want emotional validation, not solutions to their problems.
#56
“Happy Heavenly Birthday” posts on Facebook. They ded, man.
sock man 3 months ago
He probably doesn't, it's just his take is they aren't having birthdays anymore because they're deceased
Load More Replies... #57
When people walking make a wrong turn or realize they're going the wrong way - they pull out of their phone, pretend to see something, then change direction.
Just turn around and go the right way, nobody is judging you. Like I am a little bit for the phone check, but besides that.
Firstname Lastname 3 months ago
Usually I am checking the phone to verify that I am indeed wrong on a map.
Michael Largey 3 months ago
Oh, I could lose my way going from the living room to the kitchen.
Load More Replies... Rinso The Red 3 months ago
This has always been a thing. Before phones, you'd act surprised like you just rememnbered something.
#58
Only 1 out of 10 guys actually enjoys behaving like a stag in heat. I do think most of us actually wanna be friends and work together, maybe have a friendly rivalry, instead of this backstabbing, cut throat s**t. I don't think most of us would be angry at another man winning fair and honest and getting the job or the money. But all those blenders, that get their way because of their charisma and office politics? Nope.
kansasmagic 3 months ago
Sometimes I think I missed out on something by not having a "crew" (at least, not after senior year of high school). And sometimes I think I just avoided a lot of pointless drama.
Robert Beveridge 3 months ago
This entire post confuses me. "stag in heat" equates to s*x, not money or employment. And blenders are things I make milkshakes in.
#59
Free Palestine. It's the new "thoughts and prayers." But during its peak, it had a moment of online bullying if someone didn't address what was going on and repeat "thoughts and prayers" like a sheep.
#60
One thing that always feels performative to me is when people post these long, emotional tributes to a loved one, either on their birthday or after they’ve passed, but it’s clearly more about getting attention than honoring the person. You’ll see a whole essay about how this person changed their life, paired with a filtered selfie or some dramatic photo, and it’s like... who is this really for? If it were truly about the person, you’d write them a letter, spend time with their family, or reflect privately. I’m not saying everyone who does this is faking it, but let’s not pretend some of it isn’t curated grief or affection for engagement.
Ace 3 months ago (edited)
Reading other peoples comments about my wife just after she died really helped me. And still does. So fück you, anyone wanting to post tributes to her, please feel free.
Hassel Davidhoff 3 months ago
I'm sorry for your loss and I'm glad that you were brought some measure of comfort in that way. I cannot imagine what that is like and genuinely fear it myself.
Load More Replies... #61
Tell you how early they wake up to "beat the day".
Loudawg76 3 months ago
Yeah I’m not sure that’s fair to say that’s performative. My body clock wakes me super early so I get up and start the day. However. -at the other end of the day I’m in bed super early. It’s not a “flex” for me - it’s just my circadian rhythm 🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
Robert Beveridge 3 months ago
I wake up early because I have a cat screaming at me for breakfast. Definitely NOT beating the day.
#62
“Let’s go around the table and say one thing we’re thankful for.”
Robert Beveridge 3 months ago
I loved being at jobs that did this. Good creativity under pressure exercise. "I'm thankful for goat mascara!"
SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
That’s the best way to handle this.
Load More Replies... Fungus John 3 months ago
I'm thankful that I finally managed to create a s*****e bomb vest that activates when I'm forced to partake in silly social obligations
#63
Giant libraries full of books they haven't read that they like to show. Bonus points if they like to tell you how they just enjoy the feeling of a book in their hand and can't use libraries or eReaders.
Lady Eowyn 3 months ago
I have books I haven't read. Yet. And I do prefer actual books to ebooks.
Blue Bunny of Happiness 3 months ago
You can’t sniff an ebook in the same way…
Load More Replies... Robert Beveridge 3 months ago
Since moving to a place with half the square footage, I've had to aggressively get rid of almost everything in my collection I've already read. Which leaves...
Ellinor she/they/elle 3 months ago
Yeah but sometimes you just want to have a home that looks pretty to you, so if I put my books by colour is it truly THAT awful ?
Load More Replies... #64
Performative activism. Like changing a profile picture “for awareness” and then never mentioning the issue again.
#65
Recycling. Although to be fair, most people think it's way more effective than it actually is.
Robert Beveridge 3 months ago
In some places it's a business. In others it's a criminal enterprise.
Load More Replies... #66
Replying with a smile and enthusiasm when someone asks you how’s it going / how are you doing. Response is always “things are good” or “im doing well!” no matter what dumpster fire you feel like your life is at the time lol.
Stephanie Did It 3 months ago
My standard response is "Still on the right side of the grass." Reactions vary.
Ellinor she/they/elle 3 months ago
Well to be fair if we answered that question honestly, no one would talk to anyone.
Rick Murray 3 months ago
I had to learn at a young age "they don't care, don't reply truthfully". See the above comment regarding small talk. If you aren't interested, don't bloody ask!
#67
ANYTHING on Tik Tok.
Canuck 3 months ago (edited)
I hate how any question you search on Google these days gets hundreds of tiktok vids of idiots. Or Reddit discussions. Just answer my fu*king question with legitimate verified information. I do not want to see some tiktok twot or read 200 comments to a similar question on Reddit. When did this become the norm. I have to do an advanced search blocking all social media sites to stop this.
#68
Veterans posting pics of themselves in uniform and/or going out to eat free meals on Veterans Day.
There's a guy I knew that I have mutual FB friends with, and he never fails to post a pic or get tagged by family every year. Maybe I'm a hater, but dude got kicked out for d***s like year 2 or 3 of his enlistment. If he had had that same pride a couple years ago, maybe he wouldn't had gotten the boot.
Johnnynatfan 3 months ago
IM a veteran and have never done this nor do I know any veterans who do this.
Jesha 3 months ago
I mean, I'd suggest doing the free meals stuff. Get what little benefit society gives you, ya know? Too bad they won't give you reliable health care :V
Load More Replies... Michael Largey 3 months ago
When I was a kid, I grew up in a neighborhood where most of the dads were WWII vets. The last thing they wanted to do was to bring it up.
Jesha 3 months ago
Most of the dads in my generation were drafted into vietnam. We DEFINITELY didn't talk about it unless they brought it up. So many broken people.
Load More Replies... BrownEyedGrrl 3 months ago
I knew a guy who always told people he was a marine. He was kicked out of Marine boot camp for attacking his CO.
#69
Coughing while walking past someone who is smoking a cigarette. I will give the benefit of a doubt that sometimes the person maybe just isn't used to being near cigarette smoke, a little but gets up their nose and causes them to genuinely cough, or maybe they just happen to coincidentally cough for an unrelated reason while walking past... But there are definitely times when the cough is so obviously fake that it is clearly directed at the person smoking and is just a way of them passively aggressively saying "I do not approve of you smoking" without the actual balls to just say it.
TheGreaterDebater 3 months ago
I do this every time. Smokers are the worst, and I will let them know that I'm not going to share their lung cancer.
Dave Reekie 3 months ago
So you act like a prime Donna simply to draw attention to the fact you don’t like other people’s lifestyle choices? How’s that going for you?do people clap and cheer at your dramatics or what? I’m not a smoker but I do have the common decency not to judge others or try to resend my lifestyle choices are more important than theirs
Load More Replies... #70
Maintaining a front grass lawn.
In most instances, houses have them and the serve no purpose other than the be there and be green. They are resource intensive, lack biodiversity and can be harmful to pollinators.
And yet, people water, mow, edge, fertilize, thatch, reseed… For what? Curb appeal? Total waste of space.
Stephanie Did It 3 months ago
I grew up thinking that the purpose of the lawn was to have a place to play, run in the sprinkler, sit outside and enjoy a cool drink and shade, visit with friends. And I still think so.
kansasmagic 3 months ago
I thought the purpose of a lawn is to feel superior to those who have brown lawns. Or is that just my neighbors who blatantly ignore watering restrictions?
#71
Kissing a*s at work .
#72
Arguing over human rights issues on the internet. If we were honest about it we’d see that way too many of us do not actually care beyond the caption/hashtag/black square/whatever. There are tons of social media arguments under every controversial news headline but many of those people would consider their work finished once they leave the keyboard. Granted it’s hard out here for everyone and we generally don’t have the capacity to be passionate about everything at once, but even picking one cause and doing major work to educate and advocate is not a thing we are actually willing to do, beyond getting riled up in the comments section.
#73
Yearly performance reviews.
Rick Murray 3 months ago
Especially when your boss can't handle the fact that you don't have ambition to expand your potential because you're quite happy where you are.
Michael Largey 3 months ago
Reminds me of my last principal. Having him evaluate your teaching would be like having Stevie Wonder analyze your handwriting.
#74
People pleasing tendencies!!
Acts performed for a targeted purpose while seeming as a good person.
#75
Small talks. Stop it already!
Marnie 3 months ago (edited)
I understand why some people don't like small talk. It took me a long, long time to be able to do it to some level of competence. But if you don't actually understand the purpose and what it accomplishes, then you're ignorant, immature, stupid, or just unthinking. You don't have to like it, but there is no reason to not be able to understand its purpose unless you're intellectually challenged. I am almost starting to think that complaining about small talk is itself a purely performative thing.
General Anaesthesia 3 months ago
Some people, Marnie, know exactly the limited real value and purpose of small talk, but are not particularly good at taking part. Calling _them_ intellectually challenged reflects more on you than on them.
Load More Replies... Jesha 3 months ago
I like to connect to other people for even just a moment. It helps out the day. Sometimes it makes me a friend. It helps pass the time to natter to the lady on the bus or something. Has to be an unforced thing, though, and not everyone likes it, but I enjoy being a part of a larger society and interacting with folks outside of my social circles.
#76
This is going to get people mad at me but: land acknowledgements. I don't mean in speeches, I mean the signs. What does this accomplish? Does it give land back? Money? Does it have any actual purpose other than virtue signaling that you know that Native Americans/American Indigenous people used to live on the land where your favorite bar is now?
If it actually served a purpose, I'd be fine with it. But it doesn't, so stop it.
Michael Largey 3 months ago
If it gives people a better sense of local history, that might lead to some small progress toward justice. But not something to be counted on, of course, and not just by itself.
Robert Beveridge 3 months ago
"It belongs to them/let's give it back" that song's been running through my head a lot this year.
#77
When anyone with long hair walks and their ponytail is dramatically swishing back and forth. Girl, you doing that on purpose.
K 3 months ago (edited)
Honestly a good question. Attention seekers can be bothersome to people who grew up and had to deal with attention seekers. Much less patience to be around them and can be instantly annoyed at the sight of them..
Load More Replies... Michael Largey 3 months ago
And guys with ponytails are swishing them for some different purpose?
#78
Studying at a cafe instagram stories.
#79
Arriving at work on a Monday morning, people saying "How was your weekend?"
Zena 3 months ago
Or the Friday alternative: "Anyone have plans for the weekend? Let me talk about MY amazing plans for the weekend!"
Hassel Davidhoff 3 months ago
It isn't necessarily that though. It isn't impossible for one to be curious about the activities of their coworkers. It isn't bad to hope they're doing something fun that will give them happiness and fulfillment outside of work, 'cuz work most likely isn't. Not everyone is 100% cynical all the time and any good team is made of people that know each other a little bit. You can't have good morale without some kind of comradery.
Load More Replies... SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
I once answered, “I flew out to Monaco to go to the casino and attend the Prince’s reception.” This was said to a coworker I’m already friendly with, who can handle my sense of humour.
#81
Straight girls grinding on each other at the club.
UKGrandad 3 months ago (edited)
Because they feel safer dancing that way with each other than with men who can't tell tell the difference between a dance and an invitation to grope her on the dance floor and carry it on when the music stops. Don't forget, too many men think that buying a woman a drink is transactional, what are they going to expect once a dance has caused their dícks to get excited?
K 3 months ago
Yes! This! Had a horrible experience at a bar with a dance floor. Random guy started dancing with me. All was well UNTIL HE PICKED ME UP and was bouncing me straddled on him.. ughhhh ick. This was ages ago but I remember it so clearly. I was so disgusted as soon as I could get out of his grip I got as far away from him as possible back to my girlies... huge life changing moment.
Load More Replies... #82
For *most people*, putting on makeup.
They act like it's self care and self-expression, which it may be.
But who's putting it on when they're not going out and no one is going to see it and/or they aren't going to take a picture for social media? Hardly anyone.
Janelle Collard 3 months ago
Yep! Without makeup, all I need is the witch's hat! And a have a very good cackle! :)
#84
Saying hello how are you and good thanks how are you feels performative to me. I don't think most people care how you're actually doing.
Marnie 3 months ago (edited)
It's not performative. It's just that the communication is more (and less) than the words. It's more along the lines of "I see you, John, and observe that you are in the same physical location that I am in. I acknowledge that I know you and wish for you to know that I don't have any desire to shun you at this time. I offer this meaningless query about your well-being as a token gesture to indicate to you all these things and that if you would like, we could continue conversing with each other as time permits. You are also free to indicate your desire or lack thereof to shun me, or your willingness to continue on to a more meaningful conversation, based on your facial expression, body language, and tone of voice in which you respond with, 'Doing okay'".
SchadenFreudian Psychology 3 months ago
It seems silly, but IMHO, it isn’t that big of a deal. Just do it; it doesn’t have to take long, and then you can go on to the important stuff.
#85
In my family, sending cards for holidays or birthdays.
Usually it's just signed with their name.
Glen Ellyn 3 months ago
I send cards to my out-of-state grandchildren, but I always add a few sentences of my own to make it more personal.
Blue Bunny of Happiness 3 months ago
I make cards and yet, I am notorious for never sending cards. If I do, it’s 99.9% going to be late
Load More Replies... #86
Saying bless you, etc after someone sneeze's. It's purely performative but people act like it required for proper manners.
Lady Eowyn 3 months ago
I see nothing wrong with this. It's a custom dating back to time people thought that a demon could enter your body when you sneezed.
Daniel Atkins 3 months ago
One of the darker origins says that the phrase comes from the time of the Plague. Sneezing being one of the symptoms so they were blessing someone they thought might be dying.
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What do you think ?
kansasmagic 3 months ago
When you read Nietzsche and La Rochefoucald at sixteen - on top of just being sixteen - nearly everything that people do starts to look performative. Well, everything that *other people* do. I of course was deep, profound, and authentic.
Drop Bear from Hell 3 months ago
Influencers.......of every kind.........as soon as they open their mouths.
kansasmagic 3 months ago
When you read Nietzsche and La Rochefoucald at sixteen - on top of just being sixteen - nearly everything that people do starts to look performative. Well, everything that *other people* do. I of course was deep, profound, and authentic.
Drop Bear from Hell 3 months ago
Influencers.......of every kind.........as soon as they open their mouths.
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