34 Behaviors That Creep People Out Now But Once Were Considered Romantic, As Pointed Out Online
To this day, when we talk about romance and beautiful, sublime love, we often remember the Renaissance, gallant chevaliers, ready to cross swords for the honor of the Beautiful Lady, performing serenades under the balcony of the mistress of their heart...
Stop! Stop, stop stop! So we really think that putting a foot of iron into another person's belly just to impress our crush is that damn romantic? Or throwing stones at the windows of a sleeping girl so that she, sleep-deprived and angry, will listen to us in a bad voice yelling a poorly rhymed song about unearthly love - is that beautiful? It turns out, as this viral thread in the AskReddit community confirms, there are lots of outdated “romantic” techniques.
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Courtship that relies on being overly persistent.
It used to be cute to hear stories of "When I first met her she wanted nothing to do with me. I showed up to her job with flowers every day until she said yes and we eventually fell in love!" ❤️
Nowadays, that's just straight up harassment.
As my Grandmama Wilkerson used to say (after she'd had a slug of hooch) "Don't come a knockin' if you be a stalkin'".
I currently have a customer at work like this, keeps trying to break my resistance to his multiple advances. No, it's not endearing. I'm paid to be nice to you, not paid to accept harassment. It makes me like him less every day, not more.
Was that ever a thing? Are we just believing that romantic comedies of the past reflected real life? I'm in my 50s, and always thought that was unrealistic and stupid behavior when I saw it in the movies.
Kind of, but not really. The "thing" was for women to play hard to get, mostly, but men were supposed to pick up on cues and not pursue women who were genuinely not interested, but that kind of culture is not great for consent.
Load More Replies...That has ALWAYS been straight up harassment. Writers wanted drama/conflict to beef up their thin plot lines and added these scenarios in...and groomed people into thinking it was romantic.
The problem is I like it in fiction, but it is so creepy in real life. Same with an older male and younger female, also usually very creepy or at the very least not going to last in real life.
Everytime a guy did this, I only went out with him when he'd worn me down, and every time it was a huge mistake. If you say no at first, you have a good instinct about him. Stick to that!
If your response to this is "people give up too easily, I want someone to fight for my love" you need to reevaluate your life.
Semi-related.
I went out with a girl, and I would get out and open the door for her when we went out in my car. After about the second day, she complimented me on being such a gentleman and that no one has done that for her.
I laughed, then I told her I forgot to tell her the inside door handle on the passenger side car was broken, so that's the only way to open the door.
Well, anyway, it worked I guess. I've been married to her for 12 years and she's the mother of my two kids.
Ha ha! Did you stop and think that in an accident, if you were incapacitated she would bot be able to get out of your car?
I helped out a dog once on the street while on my way to an interview. And wouldn't you know it - the interviewer was the dog!
Hate to tell the OP, but getting that handle fixed would have been cheaper in the long run than the two kids.
Asking a grown woman’s father for her hand in marriage.
My second husband asked my grown son for my hand in marriage. My son replied that he better take the rest of me, too. No joke.
I would have smacked my now husband if he'd done that (and that's 25+ years ago). I'm not now, nor was I ever, property to be handed over.
I did that. Not really a question as such but as a courtesy - we'd already decided we were going to marry and there wasn't anything he could have done about it anyway. Nearly 30 years ago now...
Did you check with mum too? Siblings? The postman?
Load More Replies...I disagree. But different strokes for different folks. My dad was an amazing human and we had a great relationship. It was out of respect and old school tradition. My ex-hub proposed and when I asked what dad thought, he confessed he didnt ask. He did a 'whatever' shrug and i didnt give an answer until he called and got the go ahead(despite saying many times prior that it was a proposal prerequisite) We've been divorced for 6 years now! I should've known.
It’s disrespectful of the woman. Did she ask your parents permission?
Load More Replies...Why just her hand? Why never any other body parts?
I think that goes back to, and made more sense when, women often married younger than they usually do now.
It goes back to when women were sold by their fathers. You asked for the father's "blessing" because he was saying he accepted your payment.
Load More Replies...When my sister's boyfriend asked my mother for permission to marry her daughter, my mom refused to acknowledge that the question had even been asked. (The marriage lasted about a year.)
I don't see anything wrong with this. It is a sign of respect to my Father
Okay, let's remember one of the most romantic stories of the Middle Ages about the unearthly and unrequited love of the great Italian poet Dante Alighieri for the young and beautiful Beatrice, to whom he dedicated many sonnets and poems. Now let's get a little dry reality: Dante was 19 years old when he first saw 8-year-old Beatrice, but many years later she married another man.
Dante's great and unrequited feeling did not prevent him from marrying another woman, who bore him three kids. However, in none - you hear, in none of his works does Dante mention the name of his wife Gemma, while Beatrice, who by that time had already passed away (yes, mortality was sky-high in the insanely romantic Middle Ages), remained on the pages of his poems until the last years of his life.
Hitting a girl's head with a club and dragging her to your cave.
You have clearly never been to Burnley, England have you? That would count as sophisticated there.
"Aww Fred!! How many times have I told you not to fart under the sheets!"
That actually didn't really happen in real life, at least in prehistoric societies. That's aside from the fact that only a small number of lucky ancient humans lived in caves.
Similar things did happen in real life. Kidnapping an unwilling girl for a wife was an accepted practice. The hitting the girl over the head with a club tended to happen after marriage.
Load More Replies...Now the Flintstones are going to be band from TV cause OPs post. Thank Girl.
Never giving up when rejected.
Also that stance bro-ham is using in the photo? The "trap her between yourself and the wall by leaning against it" thing? Not cool. Don't do that.
The reply "I'm really complimented, but no thank you." is one of the better ones.
Having obey in the wedding vows.
That's been tossed out by many for the past 100 years at least. yeah, by me, twice.
Apparently the pastor my grandmother insisted on having for my nonreligious parents' wedding really pushed and pushed for "obey" to be in there, but they said no. 38 years later, my parents are still married, but that church is gone.
Load More Replies...The "obey" part wouldn't have ever been problematic if it had been applied EQUALLY, because then it would have implied obeying and respecting each other's wishes and boundaries. But no -- for men it was "love, honor, and cherish" but for women, "love, honor, and obey". And that's where it falls apart. One-sided obedience is a kind of servitude, and cherish in that case becomes the way one cherishes a possession.
When my wife & I hear the part "Thru better or for worse" we chuckle. We have been thru an incredible amount of hardship, sickness, health issues, war, deaths in the family, etc together for over 30 years. Without those hardships, we would not have the bond we have today. I have friends that with the first sign of struggle, their marriage has fallen apart.
My wife would have laughted both me and the judge out of the courthouse.
Now we'll have a time skip and go to not so long ago - about forty or thirty years. How many times have we been presented with some story as proof of incredible love about how a guy was rejected by a girl more than once or twice, but continued to literally pursue her - until he finally achieved reciprocity? Or about how a lover secretly found out the place of work of the subject of his passion in order to regularly get in their way... Now this sounds a bit creepy, doesn’t it?
Forcing a kiss because you just can't resist him/her.
That's just scary. A boy did that to me on the beach in Mexico when I was 16. Eww.
A 40YO guy did this to me when I was about 15 after I had babysat his kids. At the time, I was grossly proud of it. Now I realise I was just desperate for a father figure. Saaaaaaad.
Load More Replies...Someone tried that with me, out of the blue, I'd never even seen him before, not even for a minute, suddenly he tried grabbing me. Thank god for my reflexes, I grabbed him by the throat and pushed him away fast before his face could touch mine. Then I told the bar-crew and he was thrown out of the club. Disgusting behaviour.
I found that exhaling as strongly and 'wetly' as you can into their mouths puts them right off.
Load More Replies...That famous picture of a sailor kissing a nurse. That wasn’t a romantic picture. He just grabbed her and kissed her. She wasn’t happy
When my dad started pursuing my mom at the college that they met at, he went to the records office and got her schedule (apparently anyone could do that at the time) and waited outside of each of her classrooms to walk her to her next class. He did this for like a week. She thought it was both slightly annoying and romantic.
Nope. They don't call that stalking. Not unless she said no and he persisted.
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The entirety of the movie "The Notebook" 🤷♂️ just in how he gets his first date at the start of it " Go out with me or I'll lay in traffic until I die" it all goes downhill from there.
If I found Ryan Gosling lying dead in the road, I would put him in my car so I could use the carpool lane.
Snore, one of the most boring AND depressing movies I've ever had the displeasure to watch. Personally, I have no idea why people like it, each to their own.
If it weren't for the heartbreaking parts of them as old people, this movie would've just been super generic and not memorable in the least.
I think the issue is that movies also set examples. Especially for younger audiences or audiences who have difficulties in reading social clues. Both characters in the notebook behave extremely problematic, but to see that, you have to know what a good, respectful relationship should look like to compare it. Sadly, these are really quite scarce in movies. ( carl and ellie from up, and the incredibles are one of the few I can think of)
Load More Replies...“Of course, each time has its own viewpoints, and what was completely acceptable a couple of centuries or even a couple of decades ago, today we consider absolutely strange or even creepy,” says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, whom Bored Panda asked for a comment here. “The evolution of our views is no less impressive than technological progress.”
“We shouldn't forget that morality in the old days was completely different and, for example, any European noblewoman of the Renaissance would have ceased to respect herself if she hadn't had a couple of no less noble admirers who would have fought a duel for her attention. This was the unspoken etiquette of that time. Today it seems strange to us, but... well, maybe in a hundred years our habit of sticking to TikTok will look just as weird..." Irina presumes.
I was led by old films to believe that romance would involve a lot more slapping men in the face and throwing drinks at them than it actually does.
Knowing them since they were a kid but you weren’t, like my grandad met my nan when she was 13 and he was 20, they waited til she was old enough but that’s still gross to me, like you’re just sat waiting for the child you love to be legal.
Honestly if they'ved been happily married for however long who are we to judge as long as they are both happy 😁. And no laws were violated before hand I personally say mind your own f****n g business . You people really need to ask your parents or grandparents when they got married I think you'd be surprised 🤯 also my parents have a age difference they've been happily married for 35 years so yes s**t happens sometimes and we honestly don't know the circumstances sometimes that's all I was trying to say but to be perfectly honest I don't give a c**p what people think of me either way 🙂
I feel like "mind your own business" doesn't really work when your grandfather tells you he fell in love with a 13 year old...
Load More Replies...Back in the day, a lot of people didn't travel much and lived in small communities , so most old people who got married knew each other from when they were kids. We'll, at least in my country.
They're talking about adults looking at a kid and going 'yeah, I'm going to marry you'. Not two kids who grew up together and got married.
Load More Replies...Imagine how young she would have been if there had been no laws where she became "legal." Yuck.
My parents did this but in reverse. They were neighbors growing up and my mom had a crush on my dad when she was a kid and would follow him around being obnoxious. He moved away and got married and years later moved back home when he got divorced, and found that her following him around at 20 instead of 10 was not quite so obnoxious
It sounds disgusting but my grandmother was already married and had her first child by age 13.
Any guy waiting for a girl to turn 16 just waves all the flags - she is one DAY older, not a whole grown up year.
Ordering for your date is not romantic in any way, but used to be considered such. .
Na. Disagree with this one. It differs from couple to couple. When I moved to the US, I would get anxious my the number of choices on the menu especially not knowing what they tasted like. I trusted my boyfriend to always order for me for a long time.
But they are talking about just commonplace gestures that used to be considered romantic. (I am not sure that it ever was commonplace.) What you are talking about is just a different situation where your boyfriend helped you out due to a language difficulty. That's not what they are talking about here.
Load More Replies...I think the issue is insisting on ordering for your partner. My wife likes me to order for her--she tells me what she wants, then I order. She is also an immigrant, but it's not just language. She gets mad if I don't opent the door for her, too. I'm a West coast progressive liberal who believes in equal rights and that sexual equality is still a ways off, etc.. So, her somewhat conservative stance on marriage threw me off at first. But, I adapted and she seems happy.
I like my husband to order for me. I tell him basically what I want, and he picks the dish he knows I'll like. It's partly because I can never read the tiny print on the menu and I'm too lazy to dig around in my purse for readers, and partly because he was an executive chef so he knows whether I'll like a particular dish or cut of meat or not.
Load More Replies...It depends on where you are dining at. Etiquette says the man should order. I might be wrong so please feel free to correct me.
it's only romantic if you pay attention to what your partner is interested in and can make choices that are meaningful to them. Even then it's not for everyone and you should back off if it's not their thing. For example, my partner and I like to do it for each other when we know the other has had a long day and tired of making decisions.
Well, if you somehow find yourself in any of the stories presented in this list, you shouldn’t do an instant facepalm. In any case, critical thinking and a sense of humor will allow you to distinguish what's truly romantic from what only seems so. And now, our dear readers, please feel free to scroll this list to the very end and, who knows, maybe add your own ideas and tales in the comments below.
My paternal grandparents were Italian immigrants coming separately through Ellis Island as kids around 1910. They settled in an Italian community near Philadelphia. As family lore has it, my grandfather "kidnapped" my grandmother and kept her out over night. After that, they had to get married.
I... I'm sorry but I do want to hear from grandma. Did he kidnap her or was that just an excuse so she could stay out with him? If he dud it's f***d but idk something about how it's written gives Mr the inpression it's one of those "girl wants to say yes but doesn't want to get shamed so says she was forced" I might be very wrong
From reddit: "They were already a couple, and she stayed out with him overnight. I guess to save face and reputation, the families treated it like a shotgun wedding, which is what my grandparents wanted all along. It went down in family lore as "kidnapping." I got the impression it was sort of a tradition in the old days."
Load More Replies...How is it there folks unaware that for multiple cultures, "kidnapping the bride" was common and accepted. Accepted. By society. Right now it goes on in China- they don't like to talk about it- but it's not uncommon. Also not uncommon- when a stolen woman is found, 3 provinces away - married - she may refuse to leave her new situation. The world is big and complicated -
Just because its "common and accepted" doesnt make it right, also doesnt mean it should continue happening.
Load More Replies...Our landlady passed at 104 years of age. She was Italian. She worked with the guy but she was never interested in him. They did not date. He just came to her one day & asked if she would spend the rest of her live in misery with him. She said yes.
ok. well. heh. he really hacked the system didn't he? I'm assuming she did not object? Man, when you think about all those "old" custums.... WTF nowdays
I really hope they were just pulling OP's leg with that story...
Being announced at a wedding as Mr. and Mrs. John Smith. That used to be a thing and I always cringed because it felt like the bride was completely giving up her identity.
Also, a woman sitting in the car after you park waiting for you to walk around and open her door.
Also - man and wife. He has an identity as a man, and she is just an adjunct.
Yes, like she has a role to fulfill but he doesn't, nothing changes for him.
Load More Replies...My MIL never sent me a card with my name on it. Always Mrs (her son's name). Even when the card was for me alone.
dress up as your husband and impersonate him every time you visit
Load More Replies...As someone (probably Dorothy Parker) said, when a man and a woman become one, why do they become the man?
If I don't wait for my husband to come and open my door for me he gets his feelings hurt. He takes pride in being what his definition of a gentleman is. I think it's cute and try to be patient and wait but it's not something I have ever expected him to do for me.
In everyday events, she opens her own car door. She still likes for me to open doors to buildings all the time. On dates, she prefers for me to open the car door. I think it's cute, and I cherish it. We've been married for 24 years.
This may be cringe to you, but many women disagree, and I know many couples that the bride wanted it. It all depends on your culture and background. My parents never did that, my mother still kept her name back nearly 40 years ago, but I do not judge those who do this. If that is what they want, then why should i care. And many do not view it as the bride giving up her identity, but forging a new one.
There's a difference between "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith" and "Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Smith." Going by Mrs. Husbandsname alone isn't forging a new identity.
Load More Replies...I'm 68 now and I still remember my mom telling me how I should behave if I was dating someone. Hold doors open, pulling a chair out from the table for my date, walking down the street the man always walked on the side closest to the street and other things. But I've seen a woman say I'm not helpless, I can open my own door. I still do these things for my wife, but some people say it's being condescending.
We got married and I'm so glad that we're not pronounced Mr. and Mrs. John Smith. That's not my name
Wolf whistling.
Except in cartoons. Telescoping eyes and aoogah horns were the highest form of flattery.
Load More Replies...Never say anything to a woman in public you wouldn't want a man saying to you in prison.
Pretty sure this was never, ever romantic. I used to throw s**t at dudes who did that to me. Gross.
I find there is a lot of hypocrisy in this area - people offended by people doing that if they are not attracted, but should a cutie do it, it's somehow acceptable. I've literally seen friends do this.
It depends. If it was coming from someone I was already in a relationship with, I'd find it very flattering!
Obviously we're not talking about that, hun. Catcalling, staring while he drools down his chin. Don't pretend you don't know what we're talking about.
Load More Replies...My dad went on three dates with my mom during basic training. Then proposed to her over the phone from Germany. Flew back to TX, got married, and took her to Germany (she'd never left south TX before). 63 years and still going.
Eh, getting married concerningly quickly is a time-honored tradition in the military. Whether or not it works out, though, is a total crapshoot.
I'm not seeing anything problematic here. Sure, three dates is very few, but I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with it.
3 dates while in basic training? You can rule out that your dad was in the Marines we only got to see visitors the weekend before graduation.
Same thing in Army basic training. I call BS on dating while in basic.
Load More Replies...This is like everyone in the military. I get more money if I'm married?... Hey you there, want to help defraud the government?... You do? I do (too).
A duel to the death to "win" a woman.
If only there had been another option they could have chosen…like maybe the woman decides if she wants either of them. Don’t mind me, just a woman having stupid thoughts! #sarcasm
I remember how two guys in high school had 'duel', not to the death, but to broken noses and black eyes, over some girl. When girl find out about that, she said that both of them can go to hell.
This guy looks like heath ledger mixed with John snow with hair from Meredith from brave
At one time more real. You have to go back to tribal times and it was used as a way to prevent inbreeding.
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The Japanese old way of proposing which basically translates to, “Will you make me miso soup every morning, fore the rest of our lives?”.
My fat butt would still be worried about this. Maybe not every morning but I'd still be asking "Will you feed me daily like your favorite pet?"
Picking a fight with the man she is dating.
Human kind is just an other kind of animal. It is still just an animal.
Load More Replies...LOL, I had to read that several times before I realized they were implying when *another man* picks a fight with the man she is dating... originally I was just thinking, why keep going out with this girl if she's always picking a fight
Thank for clarifying. I knew I could find an explanation
Load More Replies... A matador fighting a bull, killing it, cutting it's ear off, and then presenting it (or a bloody handkerchief) to a woman.
There was a story we used to have to read in school that included a matador fight and this happened. Most of the girls just cried the bull [died].
The way they treat bulls in a fight is so crappy, I'd cry over the animal as well. Unless the guy is being jabbed repeatedly with spears too, it's not a fair fight.
It's not a bullfight. It's a bull torment, torture and slaughter...
Load More Replies...I've never understood the whole bull fighting thing. It's animal cruelty.
at least the bulls get a chance at revenge, not much of a chance though, where my nana lives, they still do a bull race but the bull are men dressed up with fake horns lol
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Sending unsolicited love letters or showing up unannounced at someone's home
However, in today's society, these actions could be perceived as intrusive or even creepy.
Finally one I can agree with. Because people used to ACTUALLY do this. Both men and women might write an unsolicited love letter (especially teenagers), and people just did show up unannounced at other people's homes (whether they were a romantic interest, friend, or family - people often used to do that).
People turned up unannounced because not everyone had a phone (landline) and they certainly didn't have email.
Load More Replies...showing up unannounced at someones house is creepy but whats wrong with a love letter?
So no love letters lol Wtf, you know, SOMEONE GOTTA START THE FLOW lol You can't just say, oh send me a love letter lol
Showing up unexpectedly is definitely creepy. The unsolicited love letter is kind of pathetic.
I'm baffled by so many youngsters who are sure they speak for everyone. You don't you know.
I'm baffled by why you think that a statement has an unspoken "everyone" unless stated otherwise. Particularly in this case, where the poster says "could be perceived as" and not "is always." If something doesn't apply to you, then they weren't talking about you. Accept, and move on.
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Throwing rocks at someone's window to sing to them in the middle of the night.
I rocked up to my bf’s house when we were first dating, blasted some 80s music (shock the monkey) and held up a hand drawn cardboard boom box I painted up the night before 😝 it was fun
I've heard singing where it was the other person who was entitled to throw the rocks.
I actually always thought this would be kinda cool😂 but I never really lived on the top floor long enough for it to ever be possible
throw a rock at the window while i'm sleeping, i'll throw a brick right back at you
Giving her father 4 horses and a mule for her.
I mean if someone offered ME 4 horses and a mule I'd probably say yes, but I'd be upset if they gave them to my parent.
As a parent I am thinking "What kind of horses?" and "Is it a good work mule?"
Reasonable questions. But that's 4 things to feed instead of just the one. On the other hand, feeding animals is usually more simple than feeding my kids... there's a lot to mull over here.
Load More Replies...It's just as awful as the reverse, where the father gives 4 horses and a mule to the groom for her. In some customs the father paid the groom to take the bride. I can understand this in say the middle ages when marriages formed alliances between kingdoms, but in this day and age, these customs need to go. Some "traditions" are stale and should be left to die out.
I believe in traditional marriage. That’s why dowry is two chickens and a goat
Holding up a boom box outside her bedroom window blasting "In Your Eyes" by Peter Gabriel.
Stalking is despicable. Forceful romantic attention is unacceptable. In the film “Say Anything” the mains fall in love and she breaks up with him solely due to her emotional turmoil due to her complex relationship with her father (which is the main plot of the movie btw - it is not a romance). They are both incredibly unhappy. He tries to contact her, and a last ditch effort plays their song outside her house as a reminder that their relationship is too precious to be swept aside in a crisis. At no point does he stalk her in this film. I will die on this hill. Thank you.
You guys: This is from the movie Say Anything, when Lloyd Dobler is dumped by Diane Court and then stands outside her window with the boom box playing In Your Eyes because it was their song. It works, in the movie. But only in this movie.
My dad followed my mom across the country. She was doing an internship where he worked and when it was over she had to go back home to Texas. They weren’t dating or anything, she had a boyfriend at the time. But my dad said he couldn’t let her get away so he jumped in his s****y car and drove to Texas.
If a woman did this to a man, people would be crying about how stalker-ish and insane this woman must be. But if a man does it a woman it's romantic? Double standard.
By the stated outcome - they got married - it doesn't seem like she objected.
It's still wrong to stalk someone, especially when she's already involved with someone!
Load More Replies...That's stalky behavior. He's lucky it worked out instead of him ending up being a wife to his cellmate Bubba...
Breaking into a womans home and leaving her a box of Milk Tray.
A cheap a*s box of chocolates, sold by "romantic" advertising back then.
Load More Replies...Unaliving yourself over a romantic heartbreak.
Its author named it "The Tragedy of Romeo and Juliet".
Load More Replies...This is not going away- since it is often biological. "Heartbreak" is real, and can make you very ill. Typically, we do get over it. But while it's happening, it can feel like "the end of the world." Not everyone experiences this kind of "love". I know many people, all genders, who regret never having experienced it- and many who have who wish they hadn't. We don't seem to get a choice in it.
I recommend playing it with captions: Romeo and Juliet Prologue Song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pv6YW8Vcd9g
Love yourself first, and then you can determine when love arrives for someone else.
Getting married after 3 months of knowing each other.
My husband and I got engaged after 3 months of dating, married 7 months later. It will be our 8th anniversary this July and still going strong. My parents got married in Vegas after 3 months dating, together 44 years and they're still in love and each other's best friends. What works for some may not work for others, but it's nobody's place to judge other people for when and how they decide their relationship should move forward.
Some people know. Great for them. For most people it's best to wait and really get to know each others true selves.
Load More Replies...That is still common today, if you know, you know. My brother knew his wife 5 months from first date until wedding, 11 years later, still happily married, I know someone who proposed after 6 dates, and the woman accepted, and they are happily married and both said they "just knew". Not everyone feels the need to wait years of dating. Many people just realize they are perfect for each other, and just get married quickly. This is not outdated or creepy, this is just the dynamic of the couple.
I like this response. I probably would have married my partner after 3 months if marriage was my thing. I knew by the 2nd date that he was "the guy," and we shacked up pretty quickly after that. It's been almost 10 years of living in blissful sin ever since. 🥰 Definitely situation dependant.
Load More Replies...I was engaged that soon and married six months after we met. We were 26, both knew what we wanted from life and respected each other in addition to loving each other. I lost him to fronto temporal dementia after 28 years and if he were still alive we would be 42 years married. We loved each other fiercely and we knew it when we met.
I don't see any issue with this one. Long-term dating is a tradition in some cultures but not others.
This isn't problematic. Now if one party is being forced to marry against their will, it's another story.
I was engaged to my husband after 2 months married after 5 this November will be our 11th wedding anniversary and 5 kids later we have been through some tough times together bereavements, sons cancer which he kicked its a**e btw complicated pregnanceys and much more and its made us stronger, yet i know couples that were together years then got married divorced within a year
My niece has just done something like this. I forget how many months exactly but less than a year for sure, then immediately pregnant (no, it wasn't pregnant first then wedding) so I'm worried about her but it's her life.
I met my now wife in May and we got married in August. Been almost 17 years now. Sometimes you just 'know'
Intentionally dropping a handkerchief and then someone running up to pick it up and return it to the owner. That was still a thing when I was a child.
I saw a girl try that with her keys in middle school, the guy didn't get it at all (or he was not interested and great at acting) and it was so very cringy. I still get second hand embarrassment just thinking about it.
This move is back when hand fans were a thing and had their own language.
Load More Replies...I mean, I guess it's a way to figure out who simps for you, but I don't see anything wrong with it.
Sending your hair to someone in the mail.
This was a thing in some places for hundreds of years. It wasn't just done romantically. People, would have locks of hair from parents, children, and other loved ones, too. Often, made into a piece of jewelry. The weird part, in my opinion, was when it was funeral jewelry, and not of a living person you were missing.
A lock of hair was a thing, especially with distance relationships. It's a centuries old thing.
Load More Replies...Unless it's a wig because they lost their hair... abd it was agreed upon
Romantic or creepy depending on what part of your body the hair comes from.
My dad tried to hit on my mom by asking her a mussel recipe (which in french is very disturbing because mussel/moule is one way of saying vagina). Never understood how they went to have 3 children together.
note: some people are pervs, and some people like being perved on. I wouldn't recomment relying on it
Putting my jacket down over a puddle.
If your jacket is wet, how am I supposed to put it on later and claim it as my own? Besides, getting lifted over the puddle is far more entertaining to me.
It was crazy when HE did it, which is why it's remembered!
Load More Replies...Whoever told you that could actually be a good idea?? Hint - they were putting you on...
I've seen it a lot in cartoons, as a kid I did believe it was a romantic thing people did though it seemed really stupid. Why not just walk around?
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Having huge tracts of land.
So, farmers, vinters, ranchers and the like should make do with a few acres?
Its a euphemism from monty python about marrying a woman because they have big tits.
Load More Replies...It has to burn down first, fall over, THEN sink into the swamp.
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Leaving an offering of purified water and honey outside your cottage on the Vernal equinox.
Whats up with this? Is this romantic???? It sounds more like some kind of cultural ritual?
I don't know this one, but there are multiple ways a young woman might seek a dream vision of her future partner, and the equinox is commonly involved.
Load More Replies...Or insects. Yummy honey. Just what I want to find in the morning, an.ant-filled glass of warm water.
Load More Replies...If someone left me a jug of spring water and a pot of honey, I WOULD definitely want to know more about that person.
When I first read this I thought putrified water and thinking gross. After reading the comments went back reread the caption undervthe picture. Purified water.
To any here who are interested in the real-life mating rituals of Homo sapiens, I recommend the short stories of O.Henry. Not the 2 or 3 still remembered- but get a copy of The Complete Works. There are nearly 400- written around 1902 to 1910; he was as famous as Stephen King in his day, and his stories were in all the current home magazines, e.g. Saturday Evening Post. Most of the stories include romance - and difficult, tangled circumstances. He was an acute observer of the times - a feminist, if you look at it from his day - with a very soft heart. He illustrates many circumstances where "Society" - the social media opinion power of the day - and sheer humanity - do not coincide. He had the wisdom of Socrates, or Laotse. The human heart- is not a subject for facile discourse, or shallow understanding. :-)
You can find some of his stories read aloud on librivox and/or on youtube.
Load More Replies...A couple people (a couple too many) saying various versions of "as long as it's legal" in these comments. And here we are folks...the exact reasons why laws had to made. How low would some of you be willing to go if there weren't laws?? That was rhetorical. Please please don't answer.
"College Humor" has a funny skit covering this subject, splitting between an elderly woman and a young woman, both saying the same lines but giving different vibes between "romantic gestures" and "stalker issues"
The romance books. She says no, he says yes, kidnaps her, forces her into s*x, she has multiple or***ms and then falls in love with her rapist... If he hits you, he likes you. NO, it means he's hitting you and you're at risk of being in a long term domestic violence relationship, as you believe that old rubbish.
Droit du Seigneur, or the Rite of the First Night, where the King (or whoever is in charge) gets to sleep with every new bride in the community on their wedding night. Probably not an actual thing, but still gives major ick vibes.
There seems to be almost no evidence that this really existed. When described in medieval sources is almost always to paint an enemy as barbaric or to justify "post-fact" a rebellion against a noble. Montesquieu mentions it, but it seems it was more to paint the ancient regime as barbaric. One point that makes the existence of the practice suspect is that it runs totally against the teachings of the church.
Load More Replies...The s****y idea of a 'sell-by' date. The equally s****y idea that having kids disqualifies someoene from mate potential. The slurs directed towards women for their choices (s**t, cougar) where men get admiration. The s****y idea of 'sexual market value'. The very s****y idea of manipulation and negging to bed someone.
To any here who are interested in the real-life mating rituals of Homo sapiens, I recommend the short stories of O.Henry. Not the 2 or 3 still remembered- but get a copy of The Complete Works. There are nearly 400- written around 1902 to 1910; he was as famous as Stephen King in his day, and his stories were in all the current home magazines, e.g. Saturday Evening Post. Most of the stories include romance - and difficult, tangled circumstances. He was an acute observer of the times - a feminist, if you look at it from his day - with a very soft heart. He illustrates many circumstances where "Society" - the social media opinion power of the day - and sheer humanity - do not coincide. He had the wisdom of Socrates, or Laotse. The human heart- is not a subject for facile discourse, or shallow understanding. :-)
You can find some of his stories read aloud on librivox and/or on youtube.
Load More Replies...A couple people (a couple too many) saying various versions of "as long as it's legal" in these comments. And here we are folks...the exact reasons why laws had to made. How low would some of you be willing to go if there weren't laws?? That was rhetorical. Please please don't answer.
"College Humor" has a funny skit covering this subject, splitting between an elderly woman and a young woman, both saying the same lines but giving different vibes between "romantic gestures" and "stalker issues"
The romance books. She says no, he says yes, kidnaps her, forces her into s*x, she has multiple or***ms and then falls in love with her rapist... If he hits you, he likes you. NO, it means he's hitting you and you're at risk of being in a long term domestic violence relationship, as you believe that old rubbish.
Droit du Seigneur, or the Rite of the First Night, where the King (or whoever is in charge) gets to sleep with every new bride in the community on their wedding night. Probably not an actual thing, but still gives major ick vibes.
There seems to be almost no evidence that this really existed. When described in medieval sources is almost always to paint an enemy as barbaric or to justify "post-fact" a rebellion against a noble. Montesquieu mentions it, but it seems it was more to paint the ancient regime as barbaric. One point that makes the existence of the practice suspect is that it runs totally against the teachings of the church.
Load More Replies...The s****y idea of a 'sell-by' date. The equally s****y idea that having kids disqualifies someoene from mate potential. The slurs directed towards women for their choices (s**t, cougar) where men get admiration. The s****y idea of 'sexual market value'. The very s****y idea of manipulation and negging to bed someone.
