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The number of Americans who identify as multiracial is growing at three times faster than the normal population, and like virtually all people of color, they have encountered racism in their lives. Even within their closest circles.

Family relationships across races add another layer of complication for people who are already straddling two or more worlds.

At least in the US, a vast majority of multiracial people (roughly 90%) say they have not been mistreated by a relative or extended family member because of their mixed-race background. But it still happens.

So when Twitter user NFTina Turner tweeted "I don't think the racism mixed race kids face from their own families is discussed enough," people responded with their own personal experiences.

#1

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Becca Kuehn
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My jaw actually dropped when I read your post. I'm sad and sorry that you were exposed to such ignorance as a child.

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Wandaluzt
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This was quite clearly posted on Twitter. Why are you trying to reply to her here?

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JennyLaRue
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If she rationalised that it wasn't your fault, I wonder why she didn't view your fathers race (or indeed anyone else's) in the same way

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Truth Monster
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She cared enough to take on a grandchild when both parents apparently could not. She may be a racist, but she's also the only one apparently responsible enough to care for a child.

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Something
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nobody said she was certified 100% evil. She is definitely racist, and that is what this discussion is about.

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Nikki Owens
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3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is not uncommon. My biological father was born from an ill-fated love affair between a Māori mother and a white father. Her family disapproved of the relationship, so she ran away with him. When the relationship failed and she wanted to come home to the marae with her baby, her father said she could return – "but not the little white bastard." My father was put up for adoption.

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Emma Love
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As long as parents keep teaching their kids hate, hate like this will keep happening. It breaks my heart that this happened to your family.

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elStiJneriNO
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In the end the black part is factual ( give or take Brown black ...) And the bastard part is the insult. If she calls her grandchild her little black angel it wouldn t be An insult.

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Kimberley Thompson
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So. Even a fact can be wielded as an insult. Would she have said white bastard if he were white?

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Rissie
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes because your father chose his skin color of course. At the skin color shop when he was a baby. It's always such a fun outing. To the skin color and birth place shop.

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Vicky Zar
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wonder why Grandma raised them. If for example Dad killed Mom, then he was a Bastard, black or not.

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Pacifico Fernandez
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

well .. if the nana was raising her, maybe her father really was whatever she was calling him and not just black

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Emily D
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I’m a mixed kid with a white dad and Chinese mom. I hate when I hear “oh it’s not your fault you’re X race”. Yeah I know but you’re acting as if it’s a tragedy I was born this race!

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Emily D
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As a mixed person, it doesn't make me feel any better if someone says "oh you poor thing it's not your fault you had the misfortune of being born the race that you are." It just makes me feel upset because I shouldn't have to feel lesser because of my race

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mario feds
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

it's not your dad's fault either... also being black is not something to apologize for

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Carrie Roettger
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have a friend who's sister adopted a mixed race baby (long Jerry Springer style story). The sister didn't like me anyway so I spent ad little time around her as possible. Once when I was around her she was bragging about how her daughter's pet name was "Oreo". Her reasoning was that other people were going to call her that anyway. I was so disgusted by that we had to leave right then. Tje daughter is 12ish now and I still worry about her wellbeing even now.

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Jack Ericson
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So it's not the girl's fault, but it is her dad's fault? These people are so confusing

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Tarryn Louise
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3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Call any man who isn't apart of their child's life a bastard (no I don't mean men who are forced to stay away because of psycho ex's... I am talking about those who decide that they don't want to be a father)... but using their skin color before it is really outdated and immature by todays standards. I know for you this was a long time ago, it is just sad that this mentality still exists today.

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Thomasin Grace
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So if she was raising you I’m thinking your dad was actually a black bastard.

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Anna Louise
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You need to get a better Nana, you can have mine, she's amazing

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Henry Shane
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why was she raising you, while it's a generalized comment it was obviously focused at one person. Was he back, and was he acting like a bastard. What did he do, obviously wasn't a good dad if grandma was raising him. Grannies anger may be very well placed, white, Asian put any one you want if is the meaning and context hat matters. If he is a piece of s**t she could say worse and its ok, people need to get over generalization if its focused.

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The top 5 states with the highest percentages of Americans who identified as multiracial in 2019 were California (12%), Texas (6%), Florida (6%), New York (6%), and Pennsylvania (4%). Multiracial Americans are evenly split for gender (50% vs. 50%) and about 2 in 10 (19%) hold a college degree, compared to one-third (33%) who have a high school education. Levels of education among multiracial Americans are comparable to those of the general population and have remained stable since 2014.

Interestingly, most adults with a background that includes more than one race do not consider themselves "multiracial." When asked why, 47% of those with multiple races in their background cited their family upbringing and/or their physical appearance.

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troufaki13
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good for you! You don't need this kind of people in your life!

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A.M. Pierre
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Of course all racism is stupid and ridiculous, but this is extra stupid to me. To hate a sweet little addition to your own family over their skin color? If that can’t get you to open your eyes, nothing will.

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For multiracial adults, experiences with discrimination are often tied to racial perceptions. For example, in 2015, about 7 in 10 multiracial adults who said most people who passed them on the street would describe them as black (71%) or multiracial (72%) said they have been subjected to slurs or jokes because of their racial background, compared with 55% among those who said most people would describe them as hispanic and 44% among those who said most people would describe them as white.

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Yes, family dynamics are influenced by many factors other than race but, overall, biracial adults tend to have more contact with relatives from one of the races that make up their background than they do with the other.

For example, biracial adults who are white and black have much more contact with their black family members than with their white family members. About 69% say, over the course of their life, they have had a lot of contact with their relatives who are black, an additional 19% say they've had some contact with their black relatives, and 12% say they've had only a little or no contact with them.

Conversely, 21% of biracial white and black adults say they have had a lot of contact with their relatives who are white, and 13% say they have had some contact. 1 in 4 say they've only had a little bit of contact with their white relatives, and 41% say they have had no contact with them at all.

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Rissie
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3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's because racism is just a very specific form of assholery.

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Lj
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3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can't imagine what's like to have a dad (or mom) who doesn't accept, and worse ridicules, half of your genes. I mean, wasn't it his choice to be with your mother? And even if he had been forced to be intimate with her (seriously doubt it), you're his blood for crying out loud, and CHILDREN. I think this speaks of something very lacking at the core of some people. [Edit: Oh forgot what I was going to say, the actual first reason I wanted to comment - I love curly hair.]

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One person who has felt these tensions firsthand is Victoria Anderson. Growing up as a child of a white woman and a black man in a small town in Maine, she was constantly reminded she was different.

A close relative nicknamed her "jungle bunny," she told CNN. Another relative once turned her framed photo so her face wasn't visible. Oh, and she wasn't allowed to play with some white cousins, an insult that added to the discrimination she received from strangers.

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Ray Heap
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That Looks like an old picture from the times when People wern‘t „offended“ by a doll.

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Commander OwO
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Same, so many people are like "omg, somebody's been spending a lot of time in the beach!"

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Viviane
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3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's appalling when a grandparent puts monetary value on skin colour. My grandmother was a male chauvinist, but luckily there was an ocean between her and her grandchildren. I don't remember that visit when she gave my brother money whenever he asked but gave me a little money and refused to give me more. It sure pissed off my mother who had to grow up with her brother being favoured.

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Doug The Pug
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

more "acceptable"? Which part of calling them half Pakistani and half Greek is unacceptable?!

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"I heard from a relative in my house that she (my mother) never should have had me because you're supposed to stick with your own kind," Anderson, now 46, said. "I was never taught how to take care of my hair, so it was always a mess."

When your answer (and the search for it) to the question "Who am I?" is even more nuanced, support is crucial. And family should be its biggest provider.

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Sleazy Weaver
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You're better off without them. Still, that's an awful thing to do to someone...

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JennyLaRue
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I know that people think saying they don't see colour means they don't have an issue with it, but I don't think people understand that not recognising race can also be damaging.

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Becca Kuehn
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

😲 I've heard the same comment from a few of my white relatives. Ignorance of that magnitude is astounding

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TheCatasaurusMeowMom
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's great! Be proactive and maybe people will learn to think before they speak (although, no lies, lots of people just don't want learn.

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TheCatasaurusMeowMom
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And this is just one example of why I hate most people. It's not ignorance, it's a choice to be an asshole.

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Becca Kuehn
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My father is Native American and my mother is white. I wasn't allowed on my white grandmother's property because she said I was "too dark" .

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kjorn
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i don't get it... i mean my brain can't process that when you were a kid you could hate someone because of their color! when i was a kid my best friend were not white at all. one were from Djibouti (africa), one were from Cambodgia, one were from innu origin and i think the other one was vietnamese. i never choose my friend. it just happen

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Pille P
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Again I'm baffled about parents themselves being racist towards their kids - why on earth would they then sleep with and have kids with a person of colour if it is such a drama for them afterwards???

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kjorn
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

normal looking... this is like we were kid and we use the color SKIN for drawing. we never think of that when we were young.

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TheCatasaurusMeowMom
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm so sorry that decades later, this still resounds with you. I classify people based on merit, not skin color. I'm a MOD for a grocery store, and not even kidding--if I need immediate coverage, I know the white kids will bail because they have no work ethic (and I'm a ginger, so that says something!). I immediately call my Hispanic, Black, and Asian employees, cuz I KNOW they will show up.

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TheCatasaurusMeowMom
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

For us (in MN, I live in the Twin Cities) having a large integrated race society, there is so much bigotry here! I spent almost 8 years in the Army down in the south. Never once did I get made fun of for being a ginger, I was made fun of for my northern-Midwestern accent. Like, why are people still going on about color and s**t? I was raised in SE MN, and had the highest Asian population in the state per capita. Did I EVER say anything racist about Asians/blacks/Hispanics/whomever? HELL no, my mom would have beaten my ginger ass immediately. Sorry for the rant, I just hate bigoted, racist, classist assholes.

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TruestBlack
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I get that ALL the time, I am Apache/White mixed. "You can't be Native American, you have blue eyes." *sighs* it's exhausting.

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Helenium
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mate she’s white has a mixed race husband and he calls himself smooth caramel lol he’s so funny

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Sleazy Weaver
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I know exactly what this post means. I'm white, & my whole family is white. My parents are both British, I'm British, I was born in Britain but grew up in America. I am not American, but I can tell my whole family views me as "the American kid" & they see me as inferior or uncultured for it. I'm seen as non-British & white even though I AM British & white. I know it isn't as bad as the other stuff on this list, but it's an example of how backwards the UK can really be at times.

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Pille P
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husbands nephew in south India was bullied by classmates in elementary school because people were saying his skin is too dark. I think it is just awful - the kid is absolutely handsome!

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J. Normal
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think every person of color has experienced it, from ignorant people.

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Deborah B
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And yet, judging from the posts here, "what about the children" is a very real issue; "How will any children you have be treated by both of your families and your community?" How can society discuss racism if talking about the racism that occurs, or may occur, is considered racist? Pretending racism doesn't exist "we don't see colour" is hurtful in itself, and prevents people from confronting and addressing problems.

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DogMom
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think this whole list shows you can be related to a POC and still be racist as hell

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DogMom
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Could she be a mixed race Puerto Rican who looks white?

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