Men Point Out Male Behaviors That They Hate And Here Are 35 Of The Best Spot-On Answers
The concept of manhood has been evolving a lot lately and it continues to be a subject of ongoing discussions.
The notion of "being a man" is no longer limited to conforming to rigid social stereotypes but instead encourages them to express their unique identities authentically.
Earlier this month, a Reddit user made a post on the platform, asking, "Men, what do you hate about men?" And it quickly went viral. Here are some of the most upvoted replies that they have received among thousands of comments under the post.
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It bugs me that so many men can't just have female friends. One of my best friends is female. She is married, I have no interest in her romantically. She talks with me about her pregnancy, vents to me about issues she hss with her husband, etc.
My male friends always act like I'm trying to hook up with her or she is trying to hook up with me.
Nope. She is genuinely just a friend.
We got in touch with the Redditor who started the discussion and they were kind enough to have a little chat with us.
"The reason I asked this is because I was talking to someone and they were saying that they wish men were more aware of what they do, so I thought maybe if I asked men what they hate about men, I could see how many of them actually realize what is wrong and also see that not all men are bad," the Redditor told Bored Panda.
If you have to declare that you are a nice guy or that you are an 'alpha', you are neither of those things.
I'm the Supreme Ultimate Ubber Super-Duper #1.0 Alpha Alpha. In fact, I'm so Alpha, I make the other Alphas like like they were Alphas in Alfalfa. ALPHA!
I get criticism for liking knitting and baking I'm over it
No I don't want to watch sports and drink alcohol
"I think society doesn't really have an 'ideal man' because no one is the same. If there was, there are definitely multiple versions of it, as there are many different cultures," the Redditor explained their point of view.
"I don't see it changing anytime soon, as the world takes very long to change."
Meanwhile, a Pew Research Center survey found that relatively few men (9%) say it’s very important to them, personally, to be seen by others as manly or masculine, while 37% say this is somewhat important to them.
However, the survey also discovered that many men face at least some pressure to engage in activities that are sometimes associated with “traditional masculinity;” more than eight in ten say men face pressure to be emotionally strong, with 41% saying men face a lot of pressure in this area.
More specifically, 57% say men face pressure to be willing to throw a punch if provoked, 45% say men face pressure to join in when other men talk about women in a sexual way, and 40% say men face pressure to have many sexual partners.
That we’re constantly yelling about men’s mental health, then turning around and calling a dude feminine for having any emotion other than anger.
- Objectifying women.
- Being proud of cheating but expect fellow men to be silent about it because of "bro code".
side note: what an absolutely accurate stock photo. that's exactly what men look like while they're degrading women. good job BP. genuinely.
I can't stand the recent rise of this horrific alpha, sigma, machismo, misogynistic, toxic, incel, red-pilled manosphere b******t.
It's destroying insecure young men across the globe, and it sets them up to be angry and bitter a******s as they grow up.
Guys who blame women, and literally anybody other than themselves for their romantic shortcomings are upsetting.
Pathetic redpill chuds like Andrew Tate or Elon Musk are getting WAY too much platform these days.
The author of the post is right, change takes a lot of time. In his book Of Boys and Men: Why the Modern Male Is Struggling, Why It Matters, and What to Do About It, Richard Reeves, a senior fellow at the Brookings Institution, explores several of the key challenges that boys and men are currently facing, including the "friendship recession," the evolving nature of marriage, and the gender pay gap.
The friendship recession is particularly affecting men, with the percentage of men who report having no close friends increasing five-fold compared to the 1990s.
This social isolation can lead to numerous mental health issues and negatively impact their overall well-being.
They don’t seem to really like women. Just having sex with them.
Meanwhile, marriage patterns also have shifted, creating a growing class divide, with educated couples more likely to marry and stay together than their less educated counterparts. This divide only exacerbates economic and social inequalities.
The gender pay gap persists, driven by differences in work patterns and time spent raising children. Women are more likely to work part-time or take career breaks, impacting their earning potential, and societal expectations and gender norms play a significant role in shaping the choices men and women make in their careers and personal lives.
To Reeves, these problems are generally structural, not individual, and the interventions tried so far haven’t been very effective. He argues that we ought to confront these issues in a deliberate and thoughtful manner. By addressing them head-on, society can work toward a more equitable and inclusive future, allowing manhood to evolve and thrive.
Maybe I’m too old… but recently I went to a dancing club after years of break (children and stuff) and watched literally tens of situations, where a drunk guy tries to dance with a stranger woman, to hold her, hug her, even kiss her - she clearly says „no”, pushes him, but he still keeps trying - from the left, from the right, from behind. Terrifying and disgusting. Especially when I think what my daughter would have to get through in maybe 10 years…
That you need to be an a*****e to get women.
Be good at something. Be funny. Ask questions.
That's it. It's not rocket science.
If a girl doesn't like you. Move on.
I don't want to fight you because we accidentally bumped each other, or your girl. When I said, "excuse me, sorry," I meant it. Relax.
That all men seem to want to talk about sports. I care absolutely nothing about other people playing sports.
I can’t stand sports. I think men think it’s the international male language but Christ, it’s dull and I try to change the subject asap.
Glad to see you guys! My husband hates sports as well. I love you all!!! 🤩
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“God, those guys who dress up as characters, and go to Cons are just weird!”…”John, they do that a couple of times a year. You, on the other hand, put a wedge of cheese on your head, take off your shirt…nice beer belly, by the way…and paint your face, chest, and belly bright colors. Every. Damn. Weekend. Oh, and by the way, did you know they now make paint the washes off?”
To this day my brothers and cousin will make fun of me about how much I talked about video games as a kid. Yet there they are talking about sports every family get together. Apparently it's not a bother if it's a socially acceptable obsession
gamer myself, have been for around 40yrs yep I'm that old and I also get told to "grow up" or seen as immature and childish,those 18+ rated games are rated that for a reason (have shocked me at times),those who may have dabbled with space invaders or at a push "medal of honour" et al, unfortunately adult gamers are often seen as saddos who still live in their mother's basement portrayed by films/TV ....try to not let it get to you, enjoy what you enjoy PS I have never wanted to go out and emulate video games in real world, video games do not make people violent (people are violent already,it's a lame excuse)
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I would love to talk about animals except when I do it's like air talking to my family.
No. Definitely not ALL men want to talk about sports, not even close.. It is very easy to find men who are wiling to talk about things besides sports. And regardless, this is not behavior to be "hated". This is simply a preference.
Tbh though, a lot of people really enjoy sports so you can still be polite about it and conversational even if you don't enjoy it.
I care nothing for it as a US man, with exception of many winter sports and some Olympic competitions. I'll be glued to winter qualifiers for Olympics, and the occasional summer competitions. And I'll gladly watch figure skating and ice dancing along with downhill slalom skiing and snowboarding. But hockey, football(US), basketball, baseball and the rest are a boring snoozefest to me. Far too many men here make one or more of those pro teams or activities their full identity.
THIS! I like to play sports (at least back when my body was up to it) but I rarely get enjoyment from watching sports - especially on TV. Sort of okay if I'm with a group of friends who are into it or I know some of the players in a local game. In both of those situations it is more about supporting / visiting the people rather than the actual game.
I hate football, rugby etc.....I'd rather spend the day on my own either fishing or on my allotment.
yep I switch off when the chit chat turns to football.....I just don't get it,as such I often get veiwed with suspicion or the best one "don't like football ! are you gay?" me: " nope not unlike have the players you worship" ps not that there's anything wrong about anyone's sexuality or indeed that it matters,it's no one's business and totally irrelevant
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Football/soccer. I don't get it. What's the big attraction about watching 22 guys (or women, women's football/soccer *is* pretty big these days) chasing a ball up and down a field for an hour and a half?
i don't think that is all we want, it is just an easy ice breaker to initiate conversation.
I used to be into sports. Then I graduated from high school and grew up.
Not into sports either... Except the World Cup in football when I become all patriotic.
As a man I would say we like to talk about our interests, whatever they are. Sport, cars, planes, crafts, dinosaurs, exoplanets - whatever. I think it is a part of the male psyche to become embroiled in the minutia of our obsession and want to share them with others. I have recently become obsessed with the song Footprints by Warning and will share this with anyone who will listen.
I honestly tried to watch sports. Most of them I find boring af. I can't "identify" with a team, so I can't choose who are "my guys" in a team match. Soccer, american football, tennis - boring. Hockey - boring as well, with people highlighting boring things and going batshit shouting how awesome they are. MMA - mmeh, I prefer theatric nonsense like WWE and Lucha Libre, but also don't get attached, not following, just watching on youtube sometimes. In fact, the only sports events that I find interesting are far from "Main" or "Official" sports. For example, a first-person view of a guy biking down the hill covered with slums, or some parcour competition.
Ngl football is bloody boring and I'm tired of it being people's only choice subject in a conversation
Yea. I'll play a sport, because I don't it fun to play, but I have no interest in talking about them, unless it is about us playing one, or watching any. I don't mind mention and stuff, but it's not something I'll have an actual conversation about.
My guy friend and I like to talk about "Sportsball" ... in parody, like The IT Crowd.
You're in the minority bro. It's like the people that have never seen GOT and want to brag about it. Most men like sports. Just how it is.
I like to watch sports and Ill chat a bit about them but I dont need to spend hours talking about it.
I love sports, but there's also other things going on in life. I can connect on a deep level with someone over sports but that's not the only deep connection available as well. As I've gotten older I've definitely grown out of sports being the ONLY topic.
A coworker of mine constantly tries to flirt with another coworker even if she keeps shutting him down. One day I asked him why he keeps trying to flirt with her when she is not interested, his answer was "I take it as a challenge". Hate men like this. I hope the other coworker will make a formal complaint soon.
"locker room talk".
I mean, I get it to an extent. But there are dudes who go overboard with saying pretty heinous things about women in general or even specific women.
The dude will turn around and be all lovey dovey.... Ladies..... If y'all only knew the things that half of y'all's men say behind your back.....
I had a coworker who would say nasty s**t about women, but then he found out I was friends with someone he was interested in. He asked me to put a good word in for him.
I talked to her about him and found out she was kind of interested in him to. I told her not to touch him with a 10 foot pole and told her about all the stuff he says about women. She blocked him pretty much immediately thankfully.
I absolutely hate competitive banter from strangers. I don't mind the occasional jibe from my mates, but if you don't know me, f*kc off with that sh1t.
It's sad that so many (mostly) young men are constantly obsessing about whether or not other men think that they're gay.
"I can't wear this, it's gay"; "I can't listen to X type of music, it's gay".
I used to work for my university's YouTube channel and was interviewing a guy and he asked us to move from where we were filming because the LGBTQIA+ student club's poster was behind him and people could think he was part of it.
You realize how much more energy these dudes could put towards things that actually matter in life rather than this obsession? It's seriously depressing how insecure they are.
Rant over.
I hate the "ball and chain" humour. I'm at the age now where a bunch of my friends are getting married now and it just started all of a sudden. I'm getting married soon and I've had so many of my friends tell me "it's all downhill from here". They're obviously joking, but it's just not funny. I don't like thinking of marriage as a battle of two opposing forces. I love my partner and enjoy our life together, I genuinely don't see then humour in constantly making fun of the person who's always supposed to have your back, and vice versa.
My wife and I have been married so long we occasionally pretend we’re like this in front of other people in a highly exaggerated way e.g. “Alright, me old trouble and strife, ball and chain, battle axe, etc.” and she replies “You men! All useless bastards! I’m going home to my mother!” 😎
The shift from when we're all hanging with women around to just the two of us and suddenly it becomes okay for them to start making derrogatory or overly sexual comments about whoever we were just with. I'm glad you feel comfortable with me dude but I don't think you should ever feel comfortable enough to start saying those things. Respect for people still goes even when they're not there to listen.
If they talk Sheet about others who aren't there they'll certainly talk Sheet about You when you're not
Why do you pieces of s**t have to be so damn creepy to women to the point they look at men they don’t know as a potential threat? Ffs is it really that hard to not be a pervert?
How creepy other men are. I’m still young, mid teens with my first job. At that job a pool is involved and my co workers, the female ones, get hit on constantly, all the time, by creepy guys. There’s one guy that comes in with kids and hits on my co worker. Another that came in yesterday had to be reported by my other co worker because the dude hit on her! She’s 16 dude!
Jordan, if you’re reading this, stop going and hitting on that 16 year old blonde you perv.
Bragging.
Just f*****g stop. You look like a tool, and yes, it's the reason nobody likes you.
Toxic men are constantly claiming that they have iron wills and total emotional control and are the strongest, but put them into a situation with high emotional context and expect them to be emotionally literate and articulate and they fall to pieces. Meanwhile, they constantly chap my a*s for being able to talk about emotions and being able to hold it together in difficult emotional contexts (and somehow related, for knowing more than five names for colors), by calling me effeminate or gay.
(NOTE: I am bi and have no trouble being identified as gay but don't tolerate being insulted for it.)
Another thing that absolutely drives me up the wall is intentional incompetence, usually to get out of doing housework, where a dude will intentionally f**k up laundry or cooking so that his partner never asks for his help again. I rat out every dude I ever hear about doing that. I've quit jobs rather than spend time around dipshits like that.
The household thing is especially annoying. It’ll only take like an hour out of your day, depending on what you’re doing, IF that? It’s helping your partner out! That’s what being a good husband is!
Road rage. It’s a bigger problem among men. Everyone needs to just chill out and be patient on the roadways.
Men and women both experience road rage in relatively equal amounts, but overly aggressive driving due to road rage is a predominantly male thing and is the “bigger problem”. It endangers everyone else on the road and is just a stupid thing to do. To the guys who do this: Slow down (both mentally and your vehicle’s speed), take a deep breath, and let it go. The car in front of you cutting you off or similar isn’t worth dying for and isn’t worth killing someone else for.
I was raised by a single mom and have a baby sister (who is an adult now). I can't stand it when men are misogynistic, condescending, controlling, etc., with women.
My older brother (38) and I (36/female) were raised by a single mom. He watches right wing videos constantly, and has absolutely no interest in the rights of anyone other than his own. And guess where he lives? With Mom 🙃
I hate men who have a constant commitment to the “tough guy” act. I’m someone who doesn’t take myself too seriously and often makes self deprecating jokes to break the ice. I was doing this at a casino once with a group of strangers and one guy seemed to see my joke as an opening to repeatedly mock me and assert his “dominance”. Pretty much ruined the overall mood at the table. Like dude can you just be a person for 20 minutes and laugh along with the rest of us instead of playing some kind of Johnny Bravo character?
I'm a very chill guy but I'm 6 foot 2 inches and built like a linebacker. Always get the guys who act tough but are looking for the nearest exit. I just ignore them and smile.
The fact that a handful of selfish a******s who can't keep it in their pants makes all men look terrible. Talking s**t about women you find unattractive doesn't make you cool. It makes you a garbage human being.
Any guy who posts videos on how to pick up women on the street. I don't watch them, but people talk about them and it's the most pathetic and creepy thing. If it's not staged, then the women look so uncomfortable and annoyed. A hard kick in the balls to these pieces of s**t should be legal and encouraged.
Assuming the first sentence is referring to sexual predators, they CAN keep it in their pants, they just WON'T. Men are not brainless animals who are slaves to their sexual impulses, they CHOOSE to ignore boundaries/consent/laws for their own gratification or entitlement.
How so many of them can’t stop being f*****g creepy and aggressive towards women. A guy tried hitting on my wife at the store the other day, which isn’t bad inherently, but he followed her to her car. When she said she was married he backed off, but guys don’t realize how scary getting followed is for most women. Even if you’re a nice dude, just don’t follow them.
...not to mention her boundaries ("NO!") weren't enough to deter the creep, but "poaching" another guy's territory was a no-go. So the potential opinion of a man who wasn't even present was more relevant than the voice of the person creep was "interested" in (not interested enough to listen to her, though)
I worked in an all-female shop for a few years then transferred to the shipping department that was all-male.
I have found the biggest gossips were men, hands down. We accuse the women of being nosy, not being able to keep a secret, but my experiences tell a different story.
A lot of stereotypes about women are just men projecting onto us; studies have shown that men talk WAY more than women, perceive conversations as equal when women only speak 30% of the time, and think women dominate conversation when they speak 50% of the time.
That literally everything between us seems to always become a d**k swinging contest.
Nobody cares who can pee the furthest from the urinal my guy.🙄
My friends have had no success with girls, and now they're at a point where they'll only make misogynistic comments all the time, while still having "getting laid" as their ultimate goal in life.
I hate the lack of empathy and compassion displayed by so many men. I’m thankful to have had a father who was very empathetic, stuck by his morals, and did not believe displaying emotion/affection is weak or something to hide.
My entire life I’ve had too many interactions with other men where I’m just taken by surprise at how they are completely incapable of seeing things from other perspectives or considering the emotions of other people.
“I’m JuSt BeInG lOgIcAl”
B******t, you’re making decisions and don’t care about how it makes other people feel.
I'm not a man but I've heard both my brothers talk about how most guys won't speak up when they see another guy behaving inappropriately, even if it bothers them. Can't go against the pack.
And, in their defense, I've actually see them walk the walk and call friends out when they say/do something *particularly* objectionable.
Not going against the pack? That has nothing to do with it. If you think there's a "pack" then you're buying into the whole alpha mentality. Men don't say anything because it's not their issue and they don't want to cause a fight with a stranger over something they said about someone they don't even know. If a personal friend is acting/talking in a way, then you say something or confront them. Some rando or acquaintance? They have their own friends/family to correct them and who wants to get into a fight with a stranger? The idea that all good men should be white knighting a stranger is some toxic bullshirt. If they're talking about someone I know, sure. If they're not, they're just some rando a*****e who has their own consequences and comeuppances waiting for them.
The manosphere “dating coach” grift on YouTube and Twitch makes me despair. I’m not exactly Lothario here but I bet I could give better relationship advice
Omg the amount of those videos I keep disliking is embarrassing. All the advice they give is absolute BS.
I definitely fit the bill for average dude interactions (head nods, sizing up rooms, reserved (emotionally dead), etc)
Though I cannot f*****g ***stand*** how if you have 10 things in common, and one thing that you don't agree on or enjoy together, the entire discussion always turns into *that* subject.
Ie. I'm a pretty avid weightlifter, gamer, hobby artist. I meet plenty of dudes with a shared interest in lifting. So instead of talking about that, they'll ask why I waste my time playing videogames.
Why do you *not* waste your time and lift less? Idk dude, f**k outta here.
Note: this post originally had 53 images. It’s been shortened to the top 35 images based on user votes.
Another thing is that I'm the guy (54yo) who never felt like he fit in anywhere. I'd hunt with my dad, play GI Joes with my buddies, build forts behind our fence, sing Grease into a hairbrush in front of my mirror and play Barbie's with my cousin Shelly. My dad couldn't see that me playing with a GI Joe doll the same size as Barbie was the same thing as playing with a Barbie. When I came out in the early 90s, I thought I would find my tripe, but I didn't. I found the gay scene to basically be a gay Mean Girls. In my 50s, I've found my tribe, my husband and my chosen family. We support women, people of color, the LGBTQIA community and we don't tolerate a******s. Our close male friends are straight and they are such good men, they give me hope. Find your tribe and love them hard.
Sexual predators and creeps CAN control themselves, they just WON'T. They feel entitled to do what they want, and since they clearly don't give a $hit about women's boundaries or consent, MEN need to be the ones policing each other.
A GREAT observation started making the rounds on the internet within the last two years: Abusive men who say they can't control themselves are full of sh!t, because they only "lose control" around their spouses and children. They somehow manage to control themselves around their bosses and other men that are bigger than them.
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Nowhere near a complete list of problems of men, or solutions. I'm a sensitive new age guy, usually, no interest in sport, one-upmanship, malicious gossip, sexist talk etc. But if I'm seriously sexually frustrated, or in serious pain, literally starving, or totally exhausted, I can get very very snarky.
I'm a masculine gay combat veteran. Not bragging as I was a bit of an effeminate teenager. I never changed who I was, but as I got older (in my 50s now) I became more masculine. I have zero interest in sports and toxic masculinity. I live in a pretty liberal and progressive area, but I'm often amazed at when some men find out I'm gay they think it's immediately okay to ask me about my sex life and if I've ever been with a woman. I've had men blatantly ask how I could like sucking d**k or getting f****d blah blah blah. When this happens it typically makes people around us uncomfortable so I will typically turn it back on them and ask, "Why are you so interested in if I like sucking d**k? You looking for a blowjob or advice on how to give one?" They usually back track and try to make jokes, and they usually exit the situation. I've never understood why straight men like to ask me about what I like sexually. Why do they care? One time I met two guys, best friends since childhood.
One of the guys was an Alpha Male. He started grilling me about what sex with a guy was like. So then I said, "You two are best friends, right? Since childhood. Have you ever seen each other naked?" The one dude got offended, but his best friend was snickering. Then I asked, "Did you guys ever mess around together as teenagers?" The guy was getting pissed. His friend was still smiling. "Then I turned to his best friend and asked, "Has he ever asked you about eating pussy or f*****g a woman?" His friend laughed and said, "No." Then I asked, "Have you ever had a threesome together?" His friend laughed and said, "No." Other guy was fuming. Then I turned to the other guy and said, "You've known this dude since childhood and never asked what he likes sexually, but you seem to think it's okay to meet me five minutes ago and ask what I like sexually? Either you're a closet case or an a*****e or both." Then I walked off. Dude stormed out of the bar. I got hammered with his best childhood friend and no we didn't hook up.
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The amount of times the words alpha, machismo, and assault were used in this thread truly made me sad. I know that there are truly kind-hearted, funny, intelligent, empathetic men out there who are working everyday to combat machismo and misyogynistic views against women. To all the men who stand up for women and for gender non-confirming people, thank you! For all the men who work to break stereo-types, thank you! For all the men who challenge the notion that men cannot show emotions, thank you. For all the men who also take on the role of child-rearing, thank you!
Speaking as a lesbian the worse thing about SOME (of course not all) men is the belief that somehow their shrimp dicked sexual prowess is going to turn a lesbian straight. It isn't. But the amount of times I've seen this kind of rhetoric is extremely disturbing. (I've also seen jokes about r*pe when it comes to this. as someone who actually was assaulted after I came out.. that s**t wouldn't be funny either way but it's especially unfunny to me)
I had a guy in martial arts who I thought was a friend get handsy with me during a class and try to solicit sex from me after he broke up with this girlfriend. I openly told them that I was struggling with my sexuality and that I had romantic feeling for both men and women (I currently identify as a biromantic asexual woman). He then continued saying that I should have sex with him to get over my "fear of sex" and maybe I just hadn't found the right man to be with. I wanted to scream and was so hurt afterward and felt scared and like something was wrong with me. I also had another man at a martial arts summer camp think that since I did not openly say I was queer that I was an object for conquest. I didn't even know this guy and he asked me to sleep with him and just assumed that I wanted to share a cabin with him and not the only other woman who happened to be a lesbian and who was sweet and kindhearted. Needless to say, I have not gone back into martial arts.
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This is why I barely leave home anymore except to go to work. This is why I'm suicidal. I just don't want to live in this world anymore. I'm completely fed up with everything and everyone. Seriously, I just can't take it anymore.
Noooo, hang in there. :-( It's true though that horrible people are everywhere and it's depressing. Sending hugs.
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“Found one in the wild”. We have sir KuntKrusher in comment section, showing us what these men looks like
This is quite interesting. Thanks for sharing to everyone in the comments too! As a woman, it helps me understand the dynamics of men. I've also learned I was seen as a "guy buddy" cause I was spoken to with similar vocabulary here, that I've never experienced before, so I thought he was upset/mad at me. Nope, just how guys communicate with guys ... which is a little sad. Hugs to all that feel like they need them!
Guys who think that once you're past a certain age, you're only allowed to be interested in "grown-up" things like beer, sports, and the pros and cons of different roofing materials. Dude, if you're into comic books or dinosaurs or My Little Pony or anything else, keep enjoying those things! The inability to discuss any topic other than the World Cup and how drunk you got last Friday is just boring.
Dogs. Where I live it seems that the men who feel the most insecure have the meanest looking fighting dogs, like pittbull and Staffordshire types. Even when they have small children in the house which is not an ideal combination with htis type of dogs. Accidents have happened. On the other hand, I had a male colleague who owns a Kaninchen ( mini wiener dog) and did not care AT ALL what he looked like when walking it. Now THAT's non toxic confidence. Really just like men who wear make up or pink shirts or whatever is considered "gay"these days. Kudo's to men who are not afraid to be themselves!
This is going to be the most off topic reply ever on BP but, is a dog really called kaninchen where you live? (LOL I mean I get it, stemming from "canine", but in German, Kaninchen means rabbit. Completely different etymology though.)
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So I'm not a guy, but I keep seeing videos of guys literally breaking their TVs over sports and video games, and I'm surprised it isn't on here. Wtf is that about? Like, you can't have emotionals, but it's fine to throw a temper tantrum over something that has zero affect on your actual life? (If it's because you bet money, bigger problems)Violent outbursts over trivial things are not cool. I can't imagine your buddies that came over to watch/play the game are thrilled you ruined it.
Another thing is that I'm the guy (54yo) who never felt like he fit in anywhere. I'd hunt with my dad, play GI Joes with my buddies, build forts behind our fence, sing Grease into a hairbrush in front of my mirror and play Barbie's with my cousin Shelly. My dad couldn't see that me playing with a GI Joe doll the same size as Barbie was the same thing as playing with a Barbie. When I came out in the early 90s, I thought I would find my tripe, but I didn't. I found the gay scene to basically be a gay Mean Girls. In my 50s, I've found my tribe, my husband and my chosen family. We support women, people of color, the LGBTQIA community and we don't tolerate a******s. Our close male friends are straight and they are such good men, they give me hope. Find your tribe and love them hard.
Sexual predators and creeps CAN control themselves, they just WON'T. They feel entitled to do what they want, and since they clearly don't give a $hit about women's boundaries or consent, MEN need to be the ones policing each other.
A GREAT observation started making the rounds on the internet within the last two years: Abusive men who say they can't control themselves are full of sh!t, because they only "lose control" around their spouses and children. They somehow manage to control themselves around their bosses and other men that are bigger than them.
Load More Replies... Nowhere near a complete list of problems of men, or solutions. I'm a sensitive new age guy, usually, no interest in sport, one-upmanship, malicious gossip, sexist talk etc. But if I'm seriously sexually frustrated, or in serious pain, literally starving, or totally exhausted, I can get very very snarky.
I'm a masculine gay combat veteran. Not bragging as I was a bit of an effeminate teenager. I never changed who I was, but as I got older (in my 50s now) I became more masculine. I have zero interest in sports and toxic masculinity. I live in a pretty liberal and progressive area, but I'm often amazed at when some men find out I'm gay they think it's immediately okay to ask me about my sex life and if I've ever been with a woman. I've had men blatantly ask how I could like sucking d**k or getting f****d blah blah blah. When this happens it typically makes people around us uncomfortable so I will typically turn it back on them and ask, "Why are you so interested in if I like sucking d**k? You looking for a blowjob or advice on how to give one?" They usually back track and try to make jokes, and they usually exit the situation. I've never understood why straight men like to ask me about what I like sexually. Why do they care? One time I met two guys, best friends since childhood.
One of the guys was an Alpha Male. He started grilling me about what sex with a guy was like. So then I said, "You two are best friends, right? Since childhood. Have you ever seen each other naked?" The one dude got offended, but his best friend was snickering. Then I asked, "Did you guys ever mess around together as teenagers?" The guy was getting pissed. His friend was still smiling. "Then I turned to his best friend and asked, "Has he ever asked you about eating pussy or f*****g a woman?" His friend laughed and said, "No." Then I asked, "Have you ever had a threesome together?" His friend laughed and said, "No." Other guy was fuming. Then I turned to the other guy and said, "You've known this dude since childhood and never asked what he likes sexually, but you seem to think it's okay to meet me five minutes ago and ask what I like sexually? Either you're a closet case or an a*****e or both." Then I walked off. Dude stormed out of the bar. I got hammered with his best childhood friend and no we didn't hook up.
Load More Replies... The amount of times the words alpha, machismo, and assault were used in this thread truly made me sad. I know that there are truly kind-hearted, funny, intelligent, empathetic men out there who are working everyday to combat machismo and misyogynistic views against women. To all the men who stand up for women and for gender non-confirming people, thank you! For all the men who work to break stereo-types, thank you! For all the men who challenge the notion that men cannot show emotions, thank you. For all the men who also take on the role of child-rearing, thank you!
Speaking as a lesbian the worse thing about SOME (of course not all) men is the belief that somehow their shrimp dicked sexual prowess is going to turn a lesbian straight. It isn't. But the amount of times I've seen this kind of rhetoric is extremely disturbing. (I've also seen jokes about r*pe when it comes to this. as someone who actually was assaulted after I came out.. that s**t wouldn't be funny either way but it's especially unfunny to me)
I had a guy in martial arts who I thought was a friend get handsy with me during a class and try to solicit sex from me after he broke up with this girlfriend. I openly told them that I was struggling with my sexuality and that I had romantic feeling for both men and women (I currently identify as a biromantic asexual woman). He then continued saying that I should have sex with him to get over my "fear of sex" and maybe I just hadn't found the right man to be with. I wanted to scream and was so hurt afterward and felt scared and like something was wrong with me. I also had another man at a martial arts summer camp think that since I did not openly say I was queer that I was an object for conquest. I didn't even know this guy and he asked me to sleep with him and just assumed that I wanted to share a cabin with him and not the only other woman who happened to be a lesbian and who was sweet and kindhearted. Needless to say, I have not gone back into martial arts.
Load More Replies... This is why I barely leave home anymore except to go to work. This is why I'm suicidal. I just don't want to live in this world anymore. I'm completely fed up with everything and everyone. Seriously, I just can't take it anymore.
Noooo, hang in there. :-( It's true though that horrible people are everywhere and it's depressing. Sending hugs.
Load More Replies... “Found one in the wild”. We have sir KuntKrusher in comment section, showing us what these men looks like
This is quite interesting. Thanks for sharing to everyone in the comments too! As a woman, it helps me understand the dynamics of men. I've also learned I was seen as a "guy buddy" cause I was spoken to with similar vocabulary here, that I've never experienced before, so I thought he was upset/mad at me. Nope, just how guys communicate with guys ... which is a little sad. Hugs to all that feel like they need them!
Guys who think that once you're past a certain age, you're only allowed to be interested in "grown-up" things like beer, sports, and the pros and cons of different roofing materials. Dude, if you're into comic books or dinosaurs or My Little Pony or anything else, keep enjoying those things! The inability to discuss any topic other than the World Cup and how drunk you got last Friday is just boring.
Dogs. Where I live it seems that the men who feel the most insecure have the meanest looking fighting dogs, like pittbull and Staffordshire types. Even when they have small children in the house which is not an ideal combination with htis type of dogs. Accidents have happened. On the other hand, I had a male colleague who owns a Kaninchen ( mini wiener dog) and did not care AT ALL what he looked like when walking it. Now THAT's non toxic confidence. Really just like men who wear make up or pink shirts or whatever is considered "gay"these days. Kudo's to men who are not afraid to be themselves!
This is going to be the most off topic reply ever on BP but, is a dog really called kaninchen where you live? (LOL I mean I get it, stemming from "canine", but in German, Kaninchen means rabbit. Completely different etymology though.)
Load More Replies... So I'm not a guy, but I keep seeing videos of guys literally breaking their TVs over sports and video games, and I'm surprised it isn't on here. Wtf is that about? Like, you can't have emotionals, but it's fine to throw a temper tantrum over something that has zero affect on your actual life? (If it's because you bet money, bigger problems)Violent outbursts over trivial things are not cool. I can't imagine your buddies that came over to watch/play the game are thrilled you ruined it.
