There is no one-size-fits-all solution to parenting, so it can be hard to judge what an adult chooses to do as their childcare solution. But certain parents, for better or worse, decide to outsource their tasks to, inevitably, a tablet, smartphone, or TV screen.
TikToker and mom Alexandra Sabol described and demonstrated her parenting style, with ample snacks and screen time for her kids. Netizens had pretty strong opinions, which they actively voiced in the comments section.
More info: TikTok
Some adults trust that a tablet is enough of a substitute for parenting
Image credits: Jessica Lewis 🦋 thepaintedsquare
One mom believes in giving her kids a lot of snacks, sweets and unlimited screen time
Image credits: alexbabii97
Image credits: alexbabii97
Image credits: alexbabii97
Image credits: alexbabii97
Image credits: alexbabii97
Image credits: alexbabii97
Image credits: alexbabii97
Image credits: alexbabii97
Image credits: alexbabii97
You can watch the full video here:
@alexbabii97 #silkymom #fyp #foryou ♬ original sound – Alexandra Sabol
Some might be wondering what exactly is a silky mom
Many of you might immediately be asking the obvious question, that is, what on God’s green earth is a “silky mom”? Unless you are a parenting-content aficionado, this term might seem anything from confusing to downright risque. But the truth is a lot more simple. A silky mom (or parent) is simply one who embraces all the current, “suggested” parenting methods, from indulging your child to allowing them digital device access.
This doesn’t necessarily sound that bad. After all, strict, 20th-century parenting is likely the cause of a whole host of issues, so actually engaging in what your child wants might not be the worst thing in the world. Technological skills are more important than ever and strict eating habits tend to only lead to eating disorders.
However, as some of the comments point out, children tend to not exactly know what’s best for them. This is, among other reasons, why we don’t let them take loans, get married, vote, or sign job contracts. When I was a child, if I had it my way, we would be eating pizza and cake for a solid 80% of meals. I would inevitably pass for heart disease before reaching my forties in this alternative reality.
This isn’t the only parenting “style” to emerge on TikTok
An alternative to the “silky mom,” if we are keeping to this terminology, is the “crunchy” mom. This parenting style is considerably more old-school, with near-mandatory outdoor time, no snacks, limited free time, and a focus on tactile, physical toys. While on paper it perhaps doesn’t sound that bad, like the silky moms out there, it all comes down to execution.
For example, many crunchy moms embrace unmedicated births, perhaps even ones done at home. They might breastfeed a lot longer into their child’s life and often have a superiority complex, as if suffering and ignoring modern medicine is a mark of a “better” mom. When and where this became a competition is a mystery.
And, to round off this tour of TikTok-based parenting, there is the parenting style in the middle, the scrunchy mom. At the core of this philosophy, is trusting one’s gut and being open to experiment. As in most things in life, moderation is key, which might mean not giving your kids industrial levels of sugar every day, but simultaneously still letting them try the sorts of foods that kids enjoy.
Many commenters called out the mom for being lazy
But some thought it wasn’t as bad as it seemed
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Disgustingly lazy. How is she proud of this?? This isn't a parenting style, it's practically abuse!
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Not necessarily lazy but irresponsible, uninformed and plain stupid. Bad eating habits will have consequences later on in life, if not now. Too much screen time has effects on learning, focus and all kinds of things. Just because you coin a name for being a person with no self control, doesn't mean that you are a good parent.
Yeah, not a fan of the free access to unhealthy food. Treats definitely have their place, but shouldn't be the main thing that kids are eating. My (hippy-ish) parents raised me on organic, healthy, whole foods. There were times I hated it, like in sixth grade when I coveted my classmates bologna and american cheese on white bread (and I was stuck with baked tofu and sprouts on a ciabatta roll--a sandwich I'd love now!). As an adult, however, I am so grateful. My comfort foods are things like basmati rice with steamed broccoli and tamari, not mac and cheese (not that there's anything wrong with mac and cheese!). It's easy for me to fall back on a healthy diet, because it's what I was raised on. Thanks, mom and dad!
my children always had free access to healthy food and candies...but there was always a limited small amount of candies and lot of fruits ans legumes.. I never wanted use food as a tool of parenting,so they don't be conditioned to use food as emotional relief. My parents were bad at cooking and it took a lot of time to getting used to healthy food, I never got fresh legumes or fruit and candy just for some comforting. I learned sideways to my kids to change my habits.
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This is frustrating. So, we didn't put a lot of restrictions on our kids. We wanted them to be able to make choices for themselves from an early age. I feel like we dictate everything kids can and can't do from day one and then get all upset with them when they struggle to do things for themselves when they're older. So, my kids were allowed to eat whenever they were hungry. BUT, I got to choose what the pantry was stocked with and it wasn't junk food. They got to choose how they spent their free time. Screens were unlimited, but if we saw they were seeming to spend too much time on screens, we'd suggest something else. We led by example. So, we would go out and do sports, go hiking, play board games, do an art project. Eventually, they were able to basically self regulate to the point that they were choosing less screen time on their own. We never wanted screen time to be "bad" because screens are used for everything.
You can indulge your kids, you can respect their autonomy and still make sure they're being taken care of and being give good choices that will lead to good habits. You are still their guide and they learn by example. This just seems like lazy parenting.
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Half of me is hoping this is fake/rage bait. The other half is wondering how the pediatrician resists the urge to smack her upside the head at every appointment.
is some places this would lead to a visit from social services
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That mom is gonna get a lot of calls from teachers when those kids are in school because there is going to be a lot of tantrums and lots of entitlement I hope her kids aren't homeschooling either because they won't learn anything the only positive is having the money of being a silky mom if I had that kind of money I'd have less issues
"I'm a silky mom, I don't believe in boundaries because it's hard. In 20 years, I'll be shocked my kids dont talk to me, are insecure, in bad relationships, and don't know how to take no for an answer."
A bunch of willfully ignorant, lazy, unmotivated, unhealthy, kids who need immediate gratification and will never develop normal social skills or relationships... but go ahead and be silky.
And here I am struggling to become a mum and this thing gets them and treats them this way. Can't even look at her she makes me sick oh let's make my kids unheathly and obese and spoiled
You're a lazy trash mom who doesn't care if your kids end up unhealthy and morbidly obese (not fat shaming, but this is absolute b******t!)...
She is proud of something she should be ashamed of... just gross.
When her one, or more,of her kids end up type 2 diabetic, she's going to have hard time with feeding them what they need to eat. This woman is a menace to her own kids, and to our already broken medical care system. We'll see her crying about how hard life is and how her kid(s) don't deserve this. No, they don't, just like they don't deserve an irresponsible, selfish parent, but here we are, and it'll all be her fault.
I used to know several kids like this. Now their obese, have poor social skills, and failing grades.
All I heard was "I'm a sh*tty mom". Lazy*ss mom. That's not something to brag about when CPS comes knocking on your door when your kids don't go to school bc you let them do what they want.
" I'm a silky mum so of course I'm a lazy b***h who doesn't care about my kids"
The absurd idea of needing a license to raise children comes to mind. I pity the children. Children are not small adults. They're children who need parenting, proper nutrition and guidance. Not permanent distraction and sugar based diet.
.... so you're just poor? Cause that's how I was raised & it wasn't by choice. We were just poor. I also was so addicted to sugar bc of this that by the time I was 26 I had to have all of my teeth pulled & replaced w/ permanent dentures. It was also bc my mom was a "silky mom" who didn't instill any real sense of responsibility for our health... so I was raised just like this.. I got to do whatever I wanted & then when i became an adult i suffered the consequences of having a s****y mother. Also, why do we have to give everything these stupid names? "Silly mom" or "beige moms" like... stop. Just say you're poor or you're boring or you're controlling... it's giving republicans always coming up w/ new ways to be racist. Now it's "diversity" ... lol. Just stop. Nobody needs to hear about why you're giving your kids diabetes & leading them to inevitable obesity.. or why you can't allow your kids to play w/ colorful s**t or anything else yall overshare about on tile tok. Stop.
Good point. Most republicans aren't racist though.
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You need to be a parent to those kids NOW so they don't rob me in a few years ~ Chris Rock (paraphrased)
I never had kids because I didn't think I'd be able to do it. This woman took the step I never took but with the same results.
With tablets and phones, you decide what goes on them. My son's iPad has a ton of educational apps, music apps, a drawing app, an app to help with his speech and no access to the internet apart from about 3 sites. At 7pm everything locks out. Though he is not on it all the time but it is a good way for him to decompress after school.
This is just what my parents did in the 90s. I try to do a happy medium between this extreme and the other. The crunchy parenting can be just as bad in different ways but especially when it comes to the medical aspect of parenting.
There needs to be a balance. Too restrictive and that can lead to problems but so can being too lenient
I have a bit of a balance between this and the other term they use that is the opposite. My kids have snacks but they have a mix of healthy and junky, meaning they have chips and they have fruit and depending on how well a vary the fruit options, it'll be their main choice of snack until it's all gone. My 10 yr has a tablet and my 9yr used to until he broke it and I didn't replace it because he didn't take care of it the first time. I don't have any video game consoles in my house. When the weather is nice and their friends down the street are home, they spend the day outside and that's by choice. I don't have to force them. Even when they are watching TV, it's mostly background noise while they play with their toys. Getting they to help pick up is the big challenge I face.
I think the most twisted part is her putting in on tiktok as a brag / attention. Just speaks volumes about her and lack of parenting style.
This mom is doing what is easier for her and not what is best for the children. When they grow up, I don't think they will look back on those parenting choices fondly.
This is one of the reasons I never had kids. I have severe depression and BPD. A lot of days "I can't" meaning get out of bed. I was severely neglected as a child.
That's how my dad raised my brother and I... and it wasn't out of love. He just resented parenting and wanted to keep us quiet and out of his way so he didn't have to deal with our existence. My brother has terrible eating habits and health and will probably die in his 50's, while I struggled for 30+ years trying to learn to be a functional adult and human being after never being taught anything at home...
I put in more effort with my cat! These kids need parental attention, affection, and guidance, not tablets and technology!
Okay if this is lazy parenting then I want you to stop using your phone for everything, I want you to stop going to Starbucks, I want you to no longer go to a restaurant, and I want you to stop watching Netflix Hulu and other TV services. No more games. Nothing else other then hiking sleeping and going to work. K? K 😁
Well, of course she is. Has to free up plenty of time to take off her wig and glasses and be the face on the moon every night
I am sure there are way worse parents but this one is actually using social media to promote her "parenting style".
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You know USA citizens don't have access to nuclear bombs, right?
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Disgustingly lazy. How is she proud of this?? This isn't a parenting style, it's practically abuse!
Load More Replies... Not necessarily lazy but irresponsible, uninformed and plain stupid. Bad eating habits will have consequences later on in life, if not now. Too much screen time has effects on learning, focus and all kinds of things. Just because you coin a name for being a person with no self control, doesn't mean that you are a good parent.
Yeah, not a fan of the free access to unhealthy food. Treats definitely have their place, but shouldn't be the main thing that kids are eating. My (hippy-ish) parents raised me on organic, healthy, whole foods. There were times I hated it, like in sixth grade when I coveted my classmates bologna and american cheese on white bread (and I was stuck with baked tofu and sprouts on a ciabatta roll--a sandwich I'd love now!). As an adult, however, I am so grateful. My comfort foods are things like basmati rice with steamed broccoli and tamari, not mac and cheese (not that there's anything wrong with mac and cheese!). It's easy for me to fall back on a healthy diet, because it's what I was raised on. Thanks, mom and dad!
my children always had free access to healthy food and candies...but there was always a limited small amount of candies and lot of fruits ans legumes.. I never wanted use food as a tool of parenting,so they don't be conditioned to use food as emotional relief. My parents were bad at cooking and it took a lot of time to getting used to healthy food, I never got fresh legumes or fruit and candy just for some comforting. I learned sideways to my kids to change my habits.
Load More Replies... This is frustrating. So, we didn't put a lot of restrictions on our kids. We wanted them to be able to make choices for themselves from an early age. I feel like we dictate everything kids can and can't do from day one and then get all upset with them when they struggle to do things for themselves when they're older. So, my kids were allowed to eat whenever they were hungry. BUT, I got to choose what the pantry was stocked with and it wasn't junk food. They got to choose how they spent their free time. Screens were unlimited, but if we saw they were seeming to spend too much time on screens, we'd suggest something else. We led by example. So, we would go out and do sports, go hiking, play board games, do an art project. Eventually, they were able to basically self regulate to the point that they were choosing less screen time on their own. We never wanted screen time to be "bad" because screens are used for everything.
You can indulge your kids, you can respect their autonomy and still make sure they're being taken care of and being give good choices that will lead to good habits. You are still their guide and they learn by example. This just seems like lazy parenting.
Load More Replies... Half of me is hoping this is fake/rage bait. The other half is wondering how the pediatrician resists the urge to smack her upside the head at every appointment.
is some places this would lead to a visit from social services
Load More Replies... That mom is gonna get a lot of calls from teachers when those kids are in school because there is going to be a lot of tantrums and lots of entitlement I hope her kids aren't homeschooling either because they won't learn anything the only positive is having the money of being a silky mom if I had that kind of money I'd have less issues
"I'm a silky mom, I don't believe in boundaries because it's hard. In 20 years, I'll be shocked my kids dont talk to me, are insecure, in bad relationships, and don't know how to take no for an answer."
A bunch of willfully ignorant, lazy, unmotivated, unhealthy, kids who need immediate gratification and will never develop normal social skills or relationships... but go ahead and be silky.
And here I am struggling to become a mum and this thing gets them and treats them this way. Can't even look at her she makes me sick oh let's make my kids unheathly and obese and spoiled
You're a lazy trash mom who doesn't care if your kids end up unhealthy and morbidly obese (not fat shaming, but this is absolute b******t!)...
She is proud of something she should be ashamed of... just gross.
When her one, or more,of her kids end up type 2 diabetic, she's going to have hard time with feeding them what they need to eat. This woman is a menace to her own kids, and to our already broken medical care system. We'll see her crying about how hard life is and how her kid(s) don't deserve this. No, they don't, just like they don't deserve an irresponsible, selfish parent, but here we are, and it'll all be her fault.
I used to know several kids like this. Now their obese, have poor social skills, and failing grades.
All I heard was "I'm a sh*tty mom". Lazy*ss mom. That's not something to brag about when CPS comes knocking on your door when your kids don't go to school bc you let them do what they want.
" I'm a silky mum so of course I'm a lazy b***h who doesn't care about my kids"
The absurd idea of needing a license to raise children comes to mind. I pity the children. Children are not small adults. They're children who need parenting, proper nutrition and guidance. Not permanent distraction and sugar based diet.
.... so you're just poor? Cause that's how I was raised & it wasn't by choice. We were just poor. I also was so addicted to sugar bc of this that by the time I was 26 I had to have all of my teeth pulled & replaced w/ permanent dentures. It was also bc my mom was a "silky mom" who didn't instill any real sense of responsibility for our health... so I was raised just like this.. I got to do whatever I wanted & then when i became an adult i suffered the consequences of having a s****y mother. Also, why do we have to give everything these stupid names? "Silly mom" or "beige moms" like... stop. Just say you're poor or you're boring or you're controlling... it's giving republicans always coming up w/ new ways to be racist. Now it's "diversity" ... lol. Just stop. Nobody needs to hear about why you're giving your kids diabetes & leading them to inevitable obesity.. or why you can't allow your kids to play w/ colorful s**t or anything else yall overshare about on tile tok. Stop.
Good point. Most republicans aren't racist though.
Load More Replies... You need to be a parent to those kids NOW so they don't rob me in a few years ~ Chris Rock (paraphrased)
I never had kids because I didn't think I'd be able to do it. This woman took the step I never took but with the same results.
With tablets and phones, you decide what goes on them. My son's iPad has a ton of educational apps, music apps, a drawing app, an app to help with his speech and no access to the internet apart from about 3 sites. At 7pm everything locks out. Though he is not on it all the time but it is a good way for him to decompress after school.
This is just what my parents did in the 90s. I try to do a happy medium between this extreme and the other. The crunchy parenting can be just as bad in different ways but especially when it comes to the medical aspect of parenting.
There needs to be a balance. Too restrictive and that can lead to problems but so can being too lenient
I have a bit of a balance between this and the other term they use that is the opposite. My kids have snacks but they have a mix of healthy and junky, meaning they have chips and they have fruit and depending on how well a vary the fruit options, it'll be their main choice of snack until it's all gone. My 10 yr has a tablet and my 9yr used to until he broke it and I didn't replace it because he didn't take care of it the first time. I don't have any video game consoles in my house. When the weather is nice and their friends down the street are home, they spend the day outside and that's by choice. I don't have to force them. Even when they are watching TV, it's mostly background noise while they play with their toys. Getting they to help pick up is the big challenge I face.
I think the most twisted part is her putting in on tiktok as a brag / attention. Just speaks volumes about her and lack of parenting style.
This mom is doing what is easier for her and not what is best for the children. When they grow up, I don't think they will look back on those parenting choices fondly.
This is one of the reasons I never had kids. I have severe depression and BPD. A lot of days "I can't" meaning get out of bed. I was severely neglected as a child.
That's how my dad raised my brother and I... and it wasn't out of love. He just resented parenting and wanted to keep us quiet and out of his way so he didn't have to deal with our existence. My brother has terrible eating habits and health and will probably die in his 50's, while I struggled for 30+ years trying to learn to be a functional adult and human being after never being taught anything at home...
I put in more effort with my cat! These kids need parental attention, affection, and guidance, not tablets and technology!
Okay if this is lazy parenting then I want you to stop using your phone for everything, I want you to stop going to Starbucks, I want you to no longer go to a restaurant, and I want you to stop watching Netflix Hulu and other TV services. No more games. Nothing else other then hiking sleeping and going to work. K? K 😁
Well, of course she is. Has to free up plenty of time to take off her wig and glasses and be the face on the moon every night
I am sure there are way worse parents but this one is actually using social media to promote her "parenting style".
Load More Replies... You know USA citizens don't have access to nuclear bombs, right?
Load More Replies... 
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