30 Translations From Blunt Insults And Angry Emails Into Professional Language, Shared By This TikToker

I also like: "F@ck around and find out" as "I don't think that course of action will provide the results that you expect"

I can't begin to tell you how much I HATE corporate jargon and buzzwords.

Word farting. Prefer the straight approach.

Its just "... any other duties"

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This is so long it took me a solid five minutes to understand it-

I sometimes explain why it won't work. Among the approaches: "These are my concerns: "; "If you go with that idea, these are the issues that can come up".

"Is that REALLY what you want to do?"

If I received this in response to an idea I proposed I'd think it sounded passive aggressive as he11. Just say you don't agree. If you need to soften it, agree with one aspect of the idea but disagree with the rest. It's OK to disagree with your coworkers.

I would alter that to say "will not be acknowledged". Obviously, it may be seen (text messages ect), but that doesn't mean it has to be acknowledged.

Communications received prior to this will be deleted!

Have told co-workers (in a 24/7 operation), "I am available for emergencies or urgent problems at any hour of the day or night, but please make sure that you have called 911 before calling me".

The problem is - obviously - that you have the phone open for workcalls outside working hours. Most modern phones, you can choose when people can call you and easilly make exeptions for contacts you want to talk to outside hours (such as family). If they want you to have the phone outside working hours it will cost.

Oh you americans. I accept zero calls before 10 am.

Then can you smash them in the face? Whaddya mean no!!!

Hi

I greatly appreciate your ability to wait on an answer for this...

I use this one all the time! 😂

I hate it when they write that too me. Like I'm the one slaking off lol

I love this! It will make me appear so much nicer!! :)

I don't work somewhere we have to be professional so I shorten it to "you're gonna have to talk to [Boss] about that"

This is nice!

Im onlyv assisting people who can get me a raise or promotion. Go pound sand

I ask so many questions because I'm not confidenr making suggestions on how to proceed. Sorry !!

I needed that for a specific client. If I have more than one question I have to send an email/message for every question separately or they'll only answer the first one. It's like they don't know scrolling down exists

When asking people questions, ask now more than 2 at the end of your statement the second would be in relation to the first. "what computer would you recommend? Dell, Acer, apple?"

Fantastic response.

I do this one a lot. I ask for their input and help re-prioritizing alllllllllllll the things they've asked me to do. Sometimes it helps because they realize that I've got too much going on and they take something away, and sometimes they legit help reprioritize and are more aware and realistic about deadlines

This works, have been doing it for along time. "You want me to do this? Fine, just tell me what other work I have to drop".

"Well, you tried. Live and learn."

Didn't we discuss this as a possible outcome?

I don't feel like this "professional" version was far enough removed from the original. The fact is that if they didn't listen to you the first time, pointing out that you were correct is not going to make them listen the next time. I think the best course of action here is not to say I told you so in any form and just let them continue to suffer the consequence of not listening to you, if the person is your boss. If the person is at your same job level or under your management, then It's an entirely different scenario in which the statement that needs to be translated is "I get input in this and you need to listen when I speak".

As per my previous notions, this resulting event did not go unpredicted by me.

My go to is, "How fun," or just a chuckle.

Ooooh I like this one!

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It takes me a bit longer than most people to write an email: I organize the info and questions, reread it, edit, space it, bold and use colour if that helps. I don't like getting a lot of emails back and forth. I'd rather spend more time composing one and less on sorting a zillion emails.

I recently had a manager who was TERRIBLE about this!

Better yet let do a zoom meeting with everyone from the office for the day!

Or...this is above my pay grade.

"Either is fine with me" maybe followed by "I'll leave it up to you since this is not my area of expertise." Or just no response. 🤷🏼‍♂️

Nice

Sorry I personally would say hold on, let me get my popcorn before you do this!

As per our previous correspondence...

Yeah, I can say all of these things - and probably have. The problem is maintaining an inoffensive degree of sarcasm as I say them.

"As I previously discussed/mentioned/noted" depending on how blunt I want to be.

You are going to rebuild my character!

I like it, but i had to mentally add my own punctuation.