Hey Pandas, What Stereotype Are You Associated With And How Does This Affect You? (Closed)
It can be any stereotype, race, disability, sexuality etc.
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I'm a single mom who happens to live in a trailer park. I have caregiver status for my children who are on SSI (too young to have SSDI). I've heard the s!ut comments, trailer trash jokes and 'she must just be lazy' remarks. It's disheartening to be looked down upon when I am doing all that I can. My children both see 4 different types of therapists, a psychiatrist and numerous specialists. I'm at appointments between 2 and 4 times a week and need to be available to head to the school if they are having a major meltdown or are sick (this is often). I literally cannot find a job that would put up with that. All of this is besides the fact that my PCP has urged me to file for disability due to my own health issues. I'm not easy, my munchkins have the same father whom I left when I was pregnant with my youngest. I own the trailer I live in. I own my vehicle. I am not lazy trash. Enough with the remarks.
I am very sorry to hear this. It must hurt a lot. You are really strong and we dont believe that you are any of those awful things.
I'm sorry for you,because actually you should be the one who is admired for your everyday effort. I wish more children have mother like you 💕 I hope one day things will be different for you, wish you all the best 🌻
Thank you very much for the kind words :)
Load More Replies...I have chronic illnesses, and caring for myself is my full-time job; I fortunately only became disabled after my daughter was grown up, and apart from being a type 1 diabetic, she is fit and healthy. I can't imagine how strong you are, how hard you must work to care for, not only yourself but also your children. The people who judge you wouldn't get through one day walking in your shoes! You have obviously had to make some very difficult decisions, and put your children first. I salute you, and I really hope that things will become easier for you; you have to take care of yourself first, or you won't be able to care for your children. I wish you all the best things in the world x
Thank you and well wishes to you and your daughter!
Load More Replies...I recently read that if someone insults to ask them to repeat it. You say, I'm sorry, what did you say? I didn't hear it. This POS them on the spot to have to repeat the insult and look like an idiot themselves
Thank you everyone for the encouraging and comforting words. You are what makes Boredpanda a good place.
You forgot to mention all your years as head of cat adoptions at the Humane Society, Terilee.
Not sure how that's a stereotype?
Load More Replies...I'm sorry 💔 I know how hard it is to be a single mom just trying your very best
I am 47 and never been married. People assume I am a closeted lesbian or completely damaged in some way. When my boyfriend moved in recently, I got a lot of "I thought you were a lesbian" and "Better late than never." No, I finally found someone I wanted to put up with. I liked being single. I am very happy with my own company, comfortable with who I am, and I don't need someone else to validate me. Why do people assume that if you haven't been married at least once by the time you are 25 or 30, you are automatically gay or damaged goods?
Good for you, you have every right to live your life any way you choose. I'm 49 and have been married, been in abusive relationships, and decided to give up on dating and relationships after realising how much I love my own company. I was happy staying single, and I wasn't looking for a relationship. After years of being single, I met a lovely man who lives in my building. We've both been through the wringer when it comes to relationships; we have now been together since February 2020 and never been happier. This is the first time I have felt cherished in a relationship. We have good communication, a strong friendship and love is too small a word for what we feel. We don't live together, and keep our finances separate; we both appreciate our time apart as much as our time together.
Please accept a virtual hug. I got the same comments in my early 30s when I finally got married. Apparently not popping kids out, or not being a serial dater in my early 20s was shocking. My mother actually started handing my phone number out to customers she liked at one point. That was horrific.
People feel insecure,that's why. Sometimes can't stand own company so it's for some people hard to imagine how it is to be alone all the time 🐱
Well done on doing what makes you happy! Makes me kinda sad when I see people who end up in bad relationships because they're afraid of being alone. I love being single.
You do you. Besides I was a sh*t partner until I learned to do well on my own. THEN I was finally ready for a healthy relationship
I get this from my family. I have been married and have an adult child. BUT I was divorced after 6 years and have been single since. I did date off and on through the years but mostly just could not be bothered. I am now in my 50tis. I actually cut my family off last year because they continually told people I was a closeted lesbian. My sister would make snide remarks like " why don't you just admit you're gay and get it over with" I have walked out of Christmas dinners and told them 1000 times I am not gay, It never stops. Even got my brother-in-laws niece a job at a restaurant I worked in and she told the entire staff I was a closeted lesbian. So I gave up and just cut them off.
why do people feel the need to pry into people personal lives like this?
im classified as a "gifted kid" when i was around 8, and ever since then my parents have always been on me about getting all a's, not half-assing stuff, and not 'being lazy', what they don't realize is that them doing that is actually very pressuring and stressful, and im not lazy, im a gifted kid burnout.
It is so unfair, all your teachers mark you harder and even if you get all A's the teacher writes "can do better" or "not working up to potential" and that is all your parents see. This is why most gifted students end up excelling at math and science(at least what is taught in schools), as there is only one correct answer
A fun fact that many psychologists utterly neglect to inform parents about when espousing the newly-christened Gifted child's values is that a lot of the cognitive patterns and the neurochemistry that enables the gifted-ness in the first place are rather similar to a lot of other patterns. Specifically the ones commonly seen in, to name the two big ones, autism and ADHD. The ones that generally don't respond well to pressure or repeated, dull activity. Those ones. So many people could be saved years of trouble by an understanding of "gifted" psychology past "Einstein 2.0", but noooo, we'll just give parents the world over utterly unrealistic expectations...
Same. It came to the point where i did 14 hours of school a day. Did your parents ever say "Use that intelligent brain of yours!"?
Omg - I feel this so hard. Ever get the “for someone so smart, you sure are stupid” when you make a common growing-up mistake?
Nah, but I usually get the "use that intelligent brain of yours!" constantly
Load More Replies...Same, dude! I can't have a family dinner without a panic attack, now. Thanks ELA.
As an almost 40 yo that was branded as this it can very difficult. I hit burn our in high school got my first C ever in the 10th grade and then subsequent E's. As an adult I now know I have ADHD and high functioning anxiety most likely due to the pressure. However it does get better you don't have to follow academia to be successful be proud that your brain works different it makes for a lot of interesting friends and conversations along the way.
I hate it when someone says "I'm the whitest black guy they know." Irritates the H*** out of me! My mother taught me to take pride in not only my education, but how I carry and present myself at all times. I'm far from the typical black stereotype but I take great pride in my African-american roots and culture.
exactly! My African Americans/Black roots are amazing and beautiful!!
They seem to forget the variety of influences on a person: social class, education, where they grew up, peer groups, occupation, etc. Plus not fitting someone's imagination doesn't prevent discrimination - that's on the perpetrator. Back in his university days, Neil deGrasse Tyson was stopped when he went to labs, but not when he went to the gym.
I'm female, and I like traditionally "male" things. I do martial arts. I do DIY. I don't wear make up or dresses (hardly ever). I hate pink, sparkly things. I like science fiction. I have no interest in having a manicure or shopping for pleasure. People therefore assume I am a lesbian, but I am certainly not. I'm interested in men, and only men. I've even had people tell me they "know" I'm a lesbian, and I'm just living a lie and in denial. I think I know my own sexual tastes!
Same... I don't like what's considered "girly" things. Like the color pink and dresses and things. Some of my family members don't exactly agree with the things that I do... They find it... "Unladylike" or something like that...
You be you, and to heck with what other people think. Especially since they're wrong.
Are you me, am I you? I mean, I wear pink, but that's 'cause it's not THAT girly... right? I mean, it doesn't really have cringy quotes like '[insert motivational quote]'
I feel you. When I was younger people would say I'm like one of the guys, which at that moment I thought was a compliment but now I feel like that was multiple insults in one.
I live in the Southern United States. If you have a strong Southern accent, people immediately assume you're stupid. It's a strong enough stereotype that I realized it when I was about 8 years old and actively got rid of my Southern accent. On the one hand, I'm glad I did. On the other, I'm sorry I had to.
Fellow southerner here, reminds me of a quote I heard - "just because I talk slow, doesn't mean I think slow"
also fellow southerner, can agree
Load More Replies...As a transplant from the North, my fam has been refused jobs in the South because “Northerners are too rude” - almost always because many from Northern city areas tend to speak more rapidly than the southerners. I have a Nouthern accent, which just means I’m mocked no matter where I live.
if you want to see a sharp contrast between northerners & southerners, see how they handle disappointment differently by watching reruns of the first 10 seasons of American Idol. There really was a difference in the reactions that northern rejects had compared to southern rejects. That was back when they had open audition calls in different cities. They don't select potential contestants this way anymore.
Load More Replies...I find southern accents to be really interesting and quite pleasant to listen to actually. Just because you talk in a different way does not mean that you aren't as smart as someone with a different accent.
My dad grew up in Maine and purposely got rid of his accent to be more marketable in his military career. I had a cousin who moved to Virginia as a child and the school called her parents in because they thought she had a speech defect. Upon meeting my aunt, the teacher responded "Oh you have it too". Maine accents are a bit less well known than southern ones.
When I think south I think hospitality not stupidity. They are very wonderful people and many know more than many people from the north.
I cultivated a non-New York accent in college.... I'm from Long Island.... but mostly people think I'm from Ohio or some other middle of the US place... "but you don't sound like a New Yorker?" LOL because you're shifty, snobby or low class otherwise.
You don't have to get rid of your accent at all - just know with whom to speak on the same level. I was lucky to grow up speaking multi-lingual, but my native language has many different nuances, depending on the state/province/infra structure. Some of the dialects sound funny, some extremely vulgar and some sound so foreign, you would not even recognize it as the same language. Just know when and where, with whom what style to use. It's not about hiding your origins, it's about communication on the same level
It’s hilarious when southerners complain about migrants not trying to speak English without their accent. This coming from people who get hit with a Turnnader.
I have autism and people talk to me like an adult if they dont know but if they find out they down talk to me like im a small child or usually talk about me to my friends or family as if im not there 🙁 i can talk i just get embarrased when people treat me differently and im very shy, also people think im rude when i dont look at there eyes and they ask why i wont look at them, im not rude i just find eye contact really unsettling and awkward
Yess i basically posted the same thing right before reading this! Its so annoying how people talk to us like we are stupid when they find out we're autistic like I could name almost any insect you'll see in my local area without hesitation but they act like I cant do 2 plus 2
Ditto! People assume we autsistics are Sheldon Cooper, or Rainman, or a savant, or any number of overused and hurtful stereotypes. It makes me so exasperated, especially as a female autistic. I've been told TO MY FACE that girls can't be autistic and I'm "fake" or "dramatic". Gaslighting is not cool folks. I've been treated as a broken alien thing, or a crazy genius and neither is accurate or fair. I might be able to name every Pokémon that came out so far but I also know NOTHING about politics. I'm garbage at math, but I can write like crazy. I've likened it to being a Linux in a world of PCs, I'm not damaged, just a different OS.
Load More Replies...Same. Urg. Add in people who told my parents that I was a "pitiable small thing" or tell my partner that they pity him for "being forced to care for a broken thing"...oh did he have a few words to say on the couple of occasions that has happened.
Aww... I'm sorry to hear that. I have three cousins with autism, and one of them hated me, because I treated him like a little kid. I started treating him older, and now he's one of my best friends. It really makes a difference how you talk to someone.
Asperger. Only a little bit. Until a few years ago, people didn't even know what it was. Then the film industry in my country started to "represent" people who had Asperger's. Almost every film now features someone who has Aspergerautism. Unfortunately the directors did a very bad job and that's why everyone now thinks Aspergerautists are asocial, stupid and freak out if you touch them. That may be true for some, but not for everyone. The sheer number of people who crush my hand or grab my neck without asking is unbelievable. That I feel uncomfortable is quite normal. People have no idea about personal space. That's the only thing that is good about Corona: people have to stay away from me.
Aspergic. I find it very difficult to make eye contact. People have taken offence to this, but I'm not being impolite or rude in the slightest; it just makes me feel uncomfortable. I've learnt over the years to really try and maintain eye contact, regardless of how difficult it is for me, because I'm aware that this is what a 'normal' person expects.
It's the same if there is a visual clue to a disability. I've noticed when I push my mum around in a wheelchair people will talk to me but not her. Cashiers will ask how they can help me but not how they can help my mum who is actually doing to shopping. They then give her change to me too.
I feel you. I really struggle with eye contact so in the past people think I either don't like them or I am some sort of weirdo. My son is autistic and we worry about how people will treat him when he is older. Thank fully his classmates at school are amazing and have found a way to get through to him and they just accept him as he is.
People ask me questions about my daughter when she is standing beside me. I say why don't you ask her. I find the assumed inability really hard for people to get past.
Interesting... I have never met anyone in person with autism. I do not have autism but I still think eye contact is unsettling and weird.
A woman in management (male dominated industry) wrongly assume I "slept" to the job
Also, in assuming women can only sleep their way to the top, thus making women leaders out to be 'sluts', people are not acknowledging, that apparently there is a system where a woman can only rise in the ranks by giving up her body. That well deserved promotions can be withheld, if a woman doesn't please sexually...
People always assume that I'm a cold/unfriendly/mean person based only on my face, after they get to know me most of the time I get the: "I thought you were bit**y but you are really nice!" It's like ohh thanks I guess???
Dont you hate when people tells you that your face is looking weird? F**k off. I am trying to not pass out from the pain and kisten to you talking. Its understandable that my face looks weird.
Load More Replies...I've been told the same thing, but that person only met me once before when I had a painful eye infection and I was bit**y that day.
Im 6' 2", kinda monotone(tho i dont talk much), i have long dyed hair, and i wear dark clothes so people see me in a similar way. Even my partners dad is intimidated of me and hes like 90% mussel.
By the by, im more or less harmless. I weigh 140lb to add to that
Load More Replies...I'm 'mentally ill', there's something 'wrong me with me'. No, it's clinical depression and aspergers.
Mental health issues seriously need to be de-stigmatised. I too have Asperger's, depression and various other mental health issues. I'm not ashamed or embarrassed; I have self-harming scars which I wear with pride. I also have a ; (semi-colon) tattoo, as a suicide survivor. I am a survivor, and proud.
Hi Rens. With you 100%. I’ve lived with clinical depression for 35 years, aspergers, always. Aspergers was not a widely recognised condition when I was young, hence I’ve had to struggle with it all these years on my own, until I was diagnosed a few years ago. Over the years I’ve done a lot of introspecting, developing strategies and coping mechanisms. I too have other affiliated conditions, OCD, an eating disorder, etc. And like you I’m neither ashamed or embarrassed. I am also proud of you and wish you the absolute best in life. I know it's a cliché, but you're not alone in all of this: There are souls like us out there that feel the same. Yours, s.
Load More Replies...Your job at this point is to learn coping skills that make it all manageable. I'm sure you know that. Don't tell anyone about your condition since they will stigmatize you. It's none of their business anyway. Do not put anything about this on your job applications, even if they ask. In the US, Federal labor law prohibits employers from requiring you to divulge any medical information. If you do, it is completely at your option and discretion.
Being judged by my weight: I am fat because I'm sick, I'm not sick because I'm fat.
I have Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. I am in constant pain, my mobility is poor and I can't excersise. I don't have high blood pressure, I don't have Type 2 diabetes - I'm not even pre-diabetic; my cholesterol is normal. I have to take 3 to 4 days bed rest a week, just to"function". My Disabilities are invisible, I am unable to work so I often get judged as being lazy and faking it. I wish people would be less judgemental, and accepting.
Before I lost weight people (doctors included) told me if I'd lose weight it would help my pain and health. Well 195 lbs. plus and still have Fibro, CFS, AND ESRD and no, it didn't make me better.
Load More Replies...We're living almost the same life when it comes to pain and Stuff People Don't Understand. I'm sorry that you have to struggle with fibromyalgia and CFS every day and know how exhausting that can be before you even get out of bed and try to get through a day. It sucks to deal with chronic pain, and sometimes all you want is to sit beside someone on the Struggle Bus that knows exactly what you're going through. You can sit by me if you want to.
My sister has schiz and the meds she has to take have a lot of side effects like excess appetite. Our parents have handled it well, though, so she’s not a whole lot overweight
Hmmm I'm slim and people try to diagnose my health issues too. Hilarious - some guy in the supermarket stopped me while I was looking at the ingredient list (I'm celiac, I need to check). Apparently he could tell that I suffered issues with my energy levels and tiredness. Nah mate I'm fine!! I think that some people like to think of themselves has health gurus minus the medical degrees
I have a friend with Celiac...it took her years and years to finally diagnose herself because Celiac wasn’t much known at the time. Once she started eating a Celiac diet her health improved radically!
Load More Replies...I use makeup almost every day. Usually, people assume that I hate myself or that I'm hiding something. But I just like makeup and it's really fun to play with it. I do it for myself and I am perfectly fine if I go outside without it on.
makeup is fun! people don't understand that others aren't a product for them to ogle, and if they wear makeup its "false advertising"
Me too!! I mean it's nice when someone catches me without makeup and says "you look so pretty without makeup", but then they actually expect me to stop wearing it (this is typically family). I like it and I'm not trying to impress anyone, makeup or not
Good for you. I love to see people express creativity and makeup is an awesome artform to express your creativity and individuality. I love makeup, but I don't have the patience to do it everyday. I think it is wonderful when someone will spend the time and create something that makes them happy and helps them express who they are.
It is impossible for a women to like anything. In this case, with make up, if you wear it you’re fake, and if you don’t you’re not trying/don’t care. People just need to let us be who we want to be and stick to their own dam business!
So I am a Karen. Really, my name is Karen, I’m middle-aged and have a blonde bob haircut. But I do not act like a “Karen.” I started a new job and decided to go by my middle name because I got tired of the jokes.
I work for a Karen and she is the best manager I have ever had. She is fair, honest, trustworthy, and a genuinely nice person. Every time I hear that "insult" used, I just want to spit because "Karen" shouldn't be an insult. I try every single day to be more like Karen.
I am also Karen, I am starting to hate my name too, I used to like it because it was rare but now people ask me how I like my name being used in memes and as a definition for a supreme bitch. It sucks, because people assume that I am a bitch without even getting to know me.
It's not just "Karens." I am a boomer and was shocked to find that from one day to the next I am discounted and talked down to because of my age. Prejudice and all the "-isms" are hurtful. Period. But with the "Karen" label being eliminated, what pejorative could we think up for Bitchy, Manipulative, Entitled, Unreasonable and Cruel people? Because there are a lot of them out there and we should be able to call them out. Any ideas? How about MUCBEs or UMBECs? Other words to add to the acronym?
This is a great idea! Anything but peoples's names!
Load More Replies...The first Karen I encountered was a manga/anime character (Karen Kasumi from X1999), an unbelievably kind and astonishingly beautiful lady with a sad past and a badass supernatural ability. So for me your name will always be an epitome of elegance, strength and grace!
I was wondering if this would be on here! I'm also a Karen and have started to use a fake name when ordering takeout or coffee. Just feels easier sometimes...
I’m blonde. When people think of blondes most people automatically think we are dumb just because of our hair color! Everyone has there dumb moments but no not all blondes are dumb :)
Yes! In fact, I am above average in intelligence for my age and I’m blonde! The only person who can make “dumb blonde” jokes is my karate instructor because I know he doesn’t mean it.
And because he can kick your butt? No, seriously though, dumb blonde jokes were originally aimed at BLEACHED blondes. I come from a long line of beauticians and I can attest to the fact that those chemicals can be absorbed by the skin (like lotions) and mess you up 🤯🤪🤤
Load More Replies...My first year engineering maths lecturer used to tell dumb blonde jokes in our class (150 students, 8-10 females). Yeh well this dumb blonde has a bachelor of science, bachelor of engineering with honors, a PhD of engineering and is now doing a masters in maths/stats for fun.
So much this. I am tow-headed (almost white hair) and have been all my life. I get all sorts of comments and/or not taken seriously because people assume I am stupid because of my light hair. Here are two things: 1. I don't bleach it; and 2. I am far from stupid.
I was a complete towhead (but with dark eyebrows) until I started menstruating, at which point my hair became a very, very bright blonde with lots of eye-catching golden striations, but my eyebrows remained dark until I finally went through menopause, at which point it all became a bit drab. People might have thought I was as brainy as a slug, but because I was such a low-status person, no one ever talked to me except my smart geeky friend of the year (I only ever had one because of the intense shyness that being the bottom rung on the social ladder can confer and it was always—of course—a similarly smart geeky girl), but it was a new one every year.
Load More Replies...after years of dumb blonde jokes, you get to a point where it is fun to act dumb, people will believe anything,. You eventually get to take in the perks of being blonde: never having to change a tire; getting seats in any crowded venue; free drinks; not getting speeding tickets, etc., The perks almost make up for the dumb blonde jokes
One of my relatives finds it an asset in her work as a prosecutor, along with her sweet girl voice, big eyes and round face. The bad guys spin their stories and she ever-so-nicely pokes holes in their tales. One of her nicknames is "Killer".
Load More Replies...Yeah because im in gifted and talented and im blonde. I hate it when people do make those jokes but they are really rare for me.
Such a dumb stereotype. Another one is that a redhead is fiery or hot in bed. Just NO
I have tics, and people either think that it is really fun and cool, or I am making it up, which really makes me get some internalised ableism going on which is not fun.
My son does as well (was diagnosed with Tourette's when he was 5) and went through a similar situation. He loves the face masks though and continues to wear them even though the school isn't currently requiring them because they hide most of his facial tics.
I have a Lipoma in my shoulder which causes my arm to spasm, bringing my hand up to my shoulder but my hand goes into a weird claw like position. Unfortunately the NHS considers its removal to be a cosmetic procedure so I get to walk around with an arm with a mind of it's own. Thankfully I've learned to recognise the signals it's about to happy now but people still give me sideways looks
I have Fibromyalgia and one of my many "conditions" is uncontrollable muscle spasms so I can relate. Not cool, faked and often embarrassing.
And quite often painful as well. I earned the nickname 'Twitch' at my last job due to muscle twitches. It was meant well but was still embarrassing. I hope you are receiving a treatment that gives you some relief.
Load More Replies...my friend has tics, and i don't understand why people do this s**t it's definitely real
ok, so, I am confused. and I have been looking for someone to ask about it. I have done some research myself, and I have anxiety and ADHD, and I have these, what I think are, tics. My most recent one is 'the sky is blue' and I say it at the end of a lot of things I say, or when greeting people, or when tension is high (and other such situations) and it was never a think I remember starting to say, it just happened. This happens every month or so, I just grab something off of someone else like : 'dopamine, that's a chemical' or 'happy birthday' 'indeed' and such. would this be considered?
Echolalia (repeating of words or phrases) can be considered a vocal tic. There are many disorders that can cause tics and some are transient, which is what yours sound like. Tourette's is one tic disorder with a very strict requirement for diagnosis (at least one vocal tic and two motor tics with symptoms lasting at least a year and no more than a three month break in the consistency), others have different requirements. That being said, certain medications, especially those used to treat ADHD, can cause tics as well.
Load More Replies...i am a Goth... .. i have to be a bad persoon.. wothship satan and eat babies for lunch.. the faces when people see i have kids or when i help them are priceless... it doesn't affect me anymore but when i was younger and walked around like that all day, everyday, it was very annoyed during carneval and halloween, to a point where i stopped wearing goth clothes during those times... good thing i'm also a metalhead and nerd so i can be weird all year round
Im a goth too and especially in summer people laugh at me and constantly ask if im too hot because i wear all black 😂 its so annoying im fine and actually always cold!
A lot of my friends are goths and they are the nicest funniest most good looking people I've ever met honestly, they get weird looks and get made fun of a lot though so I'm just super protective of anyone goth now
In the wise words of whoever came up with this: "In a world full of Kardashians, be a creepy chic." I feel you. I'm Gothic, and the constant side-eyeing I get from my uptight southern family is getting on my last blood-soaked nerve.
You be you. People get a kick out of how much metal I listen to (I listen to a lot of other stuff, even 70's lite rock), but, have a surfer appearance (yes, I do). I great people with the Dio hand horns
Hahhaha, that made me laugh :) take care in world of plastic fantastic 🖤
Goth is awesome! There is nothing wrong with Satan worshippers (devil/demon worshippers are dependent upon somethings). As for eating babies...is anyone really accused of that?
I'm an introvert and very quiet, especially around people I don't know. People assume I'm angry, sad, or a b**ch. Part of it is my facial expression (everyone asks me what's wrong when it's just how I look a lot of the time) but it gets annoying when people assume I'm quiet and look sad because I'm lonely or something along those lines. If I'm not talking, it's because I don't want to. I also have social anxiety, so it's really irritating when people constantly ask why I don't talk. I do, just not to you. So why is it any of your business? It's also a bit upsetting to see so many posts (not on bp) about quiet kids at school and how they might f**k s**t up at school if you mess with them and it's not particularly funny for a number of reasons.
RBF and introvert seems to go hand in hand (speaking from my own experience). I hate when you’re all deep in concentration on something, and someone interrupts you to ask why you’re not smiling. Or “you’re so quiet - you okay?” You want me to grin like a loon while collating data? Maniacal laughter while I export to Excel? Narrate my query writing?
Those last 3 sentences made me lol and choke on my drink @Pheebs
Load More Replies...It's annoying when others misread your facial expression. Or they read too much into it. Received some hurtful comments from family about our daughter being so "shy". MIL thought something's wrong with her. I was like: No, she's got my character. The kid is perfectly normal, thank you very much.
Goth mum with a shaved head here. People think I’m a lesbian or a bad mother. I’m covered in tattoos and love my two boys fiercely. My 3 year old is asd and people think he’s stupid but he’s so damn smart it’s scary. He just doesn’t feel the need to talk just yet. People judge him all the damn time. I’ve had old people call me a bad mother because of the way I look. I just say to them, my kids are well dressed, well fed, happy and healthy. How does that make me a bad mother? My piercings, clothes and tattoos have no impact on how I parent. I’m also happily married to an amazing guy for the past 11 years and hold down a job while doing my doctorate. Can’t be doing too s**t of a job parenting. No I don’t worship Satan or sacrifice animals to him. In fact I’m a massive animal lover. Granted all my pets are black haha but that’s only because black dogs and cats are the least adopted out of all pet colours. Not because of any aesthetic. Honestly I just wear my freak flag with pride and don’t care what people say about me. I know the truth and I know what they think has no impact on my life or on my families lives. And if what they say impacts my kids lives they will soon regret it.
You’re actually teaching your kids to accept and include all types of people in their circle of caring and kindness. To them the mom in a sunny summer dress and a ponytail is different. I just wish we could all accept people for who they are and not what we expect them to be. So sad.
I’m Russian. You can tell where this leads and it often masked with memes along with few typical stereotypes. Are you Commie Soviet? (That was old times, so no.) I bet you drink vodka. (I strongly dislike that drink) Do you have a tank in your yard? (no, where in the hell did I get the money to get it?!)
I'm UK and all I know about Russia is that it's flipping huge, Stalin was a bit of a s hit, there was this cold thing going on with the USA, Chernobyl (Phew, that was close) and you like putting a doll, into a doll, into another doll... ;O)
So you haven't a PET BEAR neither??? (Sorry! Two of my best friends are Russians and we make fun about each other all the time! Culture is great, food is fantastic!!!!
I hate any form of prejudice. That much said it can be fun to look at "Only in Russia" type memes. Every country has its own "Only in XXXX" stereotypical memes. Do a google image search for "memes only in Russia" for a laugh. Just remember you are dealing with stereotypes. Winston Churchill defined Russia as "a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma," and his words in 1939 spoke eloquently to the Western sense of that vast land.
There was an old joke in my childhood about an Russian worker who works in the pram factory. He's wife is pregnant and they are poor, can't but a pram so the guy steals from his workplace accessories to make a pram at home, but anyway he tries, it's turning out to be a tank.
"Do you have a tank in your yard? (no, where in the hell did I get the money to get it?!)" I think the real question is ...would you get one if you had the money?
The rubles is a bit complicated currency. A tank would be in fact be around in a sum of 470,000. But to say about house mortgage in some parts of Russia is 70,000 rubles. Considering most of the award money seemingly sound large.. then you swap currency with American dollars. It's only enough pay for a small used car. The tank might be broken down for parts, and it be only worth as decoration not a drivable vehicle.
Load More Replies...I am underweight. Even now, when I’m at a relatively healthy weight, I still get comments like: “anorexic”, “men like a woman with meat on her bones”, and “no one wants a skinny b*tch”. I am a former anorexic, but I am at a healthy weight now. I have always been underweight; it’s my metabolism. I know I’m flat and I know I don’t have the curves people want. I don’t need it shoved in my face. I never used to be ashamed of my cup size or lack of curves, but now I am.
We come in all shapes and sizes; I have the opposite, being overweight through no fault of my own. People need to stfu and keep their opinions to themselves. Words can harm and feed the dialogue in our heads. You are a survivor, live your life and cherish your body: only you know what is normal and healthy for you x
Sorry to hear that. You’re awesome and you know it! Don’t be ashamed!
Your comment "I know I don't have the curves people want" is the problem. You do and look the way YOU want. When are people going to get it through their heads that women look a certain way because they like it for THEMSELVES. Not because we are trying to attract others. I lost 35 lbs because I was diagnosed with diabetes but people just assumed it was because I was looking for a man. No I just did not want to die due to diabetes related complications. I was following doctors orders.
The fact you've got to a healthy weight is wonderful. Ignore the haters and understand you are beautiful as you are.
My parents are both tall and slim. Some people have told me they don't like the look of me. My natural weight borders underweight. So what?
Oh Gosh this was me untill I hit 30. Everyone tries to feed you up, even my own "mother" said I looked anorexic, but she just like to insult me. When I hit 30 for some reason I just started expanding, must have been my metabolism because work/food/excersize did not alter. Wish it would stop and I could be skinny again.
One can never do it right, it seems. First you're a fat b***h, then you're a skinny c**t.
"But you can't be a guy! You wear skirts!!!" (I'm trans) Well at least I don't go poking my huge, snotty nose in other people's businness. Also I have reasons. Skirts go whooooosh :D
Whooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooosh. My whoosh is better 😎
Load More Replies...Skirts are awesome! And screw gender stereotypes. People should wear what they like.
Okay skirts are really comfy tho I'd recommend 10/10
I don't wear skirts due to the whoosh part (my skin hurts) but they do look so freeing :) You be you!
Load More Replies...Just before I moved away from Yorkshire I made friends with a trans. We went on shopping trips ect and had a whale of a time. He had no cares, did what he pleased, when he pleased, within reason of course. I did miss him when I moved and time we lost touch. I hope he is OK
My daughter requires compassion and safety before all else. She has additional needs (Autism, ADHD, profoundly gifted, etc) She will change the world one day, meanwhile I am sick of the “helicopter mom” judgement. I’ll always fight my child because other adults unwittingly/intentionally harm her, not because I am a micromanaging nightmare. She is adventurous, brave, hilarious, and kind. If the world is blind to see it today, she’ll be even more surprising later.
As a former "gifted child" with ADHD, I hope you will believe me when I tell you that it does not matter a single whit if you think your daughter is "profoundly gifted" if she doesn't have the ability to work hard and isn't taught emotional resilience all the "giftedness" in the world will amount to nothing.
Nailed it, we’re all special until we can’t get the job done.
Load More Replies...I've gotten the "oh just let her be a kid" comments before and it's extremely annoying. My daughter is hypermobile, has ADHD, Autism, and hyperlexia and has recently started having minor slips in her hip and shoulder joints. Her ankles roll over if she is not wearing her shoes and she may not show that it hurts much at the time she will be sore as heck by nighttime. It's not being a controlling over protective parent to try to make sure your child's joints stay in place. I feel for you. You are being the mom your child needs. Judgmental people need to stuff it.
My son is the same except the ADHD. He has special innersoles in his shoes as his ankles were so bad. We suspected that he was in constant discomfort or worse actual pain but because that his normal, he didn't know any different. He never said anything hurt when we asked him. But the difference the innersoles has made is incredible.
Load More Replies...Compassion and safety are hard to come by after 10 years old. The world will continue to be “blind” to you if she doesn’t adapt somewhat.
Well sh!t, why the downvotes? Some kids need more monitoring than others.
Load More Replies...People think they need to talk to me in a baby voice the second I tell them I’m autistic like bro I could understand you perfectly fine yesterday before you knew I was autistic and you actually treated me like a human being
Same!! or they assume i cant talk and ask my friend about me instead 😩
As someone who has studied autism in my psychology degree, your point is often because people don't know how to address you. It's still something that is not well understood by the general public and they have this default mode where they think that someone with a mental condition is less able to understand adult speech.
Never happened to me but I can totally understand how freaking ANNOYING and offensive it must be
Many. I am a migrant so in this country I am seen as inferior, lazy, less intelligent. People assume all the time that we arent educated (like the teachers at the public language school), that we dont want to work, that we are less intelligent (sounding smart in a second language is difficult). I am also spanish so I must be lazy, always late, loud and not reliable. Xenophobia is a huge problem in this regoin of Belgium. I am also disabled. So a lot the stereotypes mix. Now I can't work or I cant go to school. So now i am the "proof" that all migrants are lazy f***s who dont want to work or integrate. I am also not really ill in the eyes of people. I just need to exercise and be more positive. I am also white. This means that my struggles are very often dismissed. I have been told by the anti discrimination department that xenophobia is not a thing, that they only persecute racism, religious intolerance, homophobia... As soon as I am white and an atheist anybody can treat me as badly as they want and its fine. I had two public employees yelling at me for making a mistake in their language. One of them took my ID and refused to give it back for a long time and did not fix my bus pass (ironically I had it for the language classes). A social worker that threatebed me with deportation for asking help about my disabilities. A bus driver that woukdnt open the door for 4 bus stops because he was pissed at me for my bad flemish (I just arrived to the country). Two doctors refusing to attend me. Two dog trainers refusing to let me work with them. If I was of another etnicity I would have a legal case against all of them. But since I am a white migrant nobody cares.
Totally understand, I'm going through the same. I used to care about but not anymore. I have high degree but people in UK assume that the best what ai can do is finding English husband to fulfill dreams of immigrant girl :) now I have such a strong attitude that people think twice before someone open mouth to say something. You don't have influence what people will say but you have influence on your reaction.
I am sorry for hearing that. It really sucks when people treat you like that. I am trying to not become biter but their attitude has made me not want to study the language or integrate (which is not healthy). But why should i waste my little energy and health to improve my flemish skills when nobody here except my partner apreciates me?
Load More Replies...Oh no Ozacoter. This is horrible. I wish I could jump in the car and deliver a big hug in person. This is horrible. Those basterds need their heads examined.
Thanks, like always you are so supportive :) Big online hug
Load More Replies...I'm so sorry. People suck. Sounds like Americans to me. I hear that here
Please do not generalize about Belgium! Many people aren't like that :) And there are also very different mentalities depending on the region you're in (North/south) - but again it's a generalization, there are good and bad people anywhere.
The number of times the 'pick-me girl pretending to be bisexual' stereotype has been used on me by random dudes on dating apps is more than I can count. Example: (the fact that I am bi is in my bio) Dude: hey I saw u were bi! Me: yep! Dude: are you sure? Me: yeah? Dude: this d*** can fix that 😎 *sends nude pic* I usually unmatch them but it drives me crazy, especially because bisexual means that I like both men and women so if he didn't say that I might have given him a shot, and random d***s can trigger my PTSD and give me panic attacks (which lead to asthma attacks which are even worse). I actually ended up deleting all of the apps because it was getting so bad. Why are bi people always seen as faking?
i'm bi too. I've heard about this happening. Never happened to me, but that's just because im lucky. im sorry that happens, biphobia is real and it is f*****g rampant
I know what you mean, I tell people I'm bi, and then they either act like I'm gay or I'm straight.
Unfortunately we are seen as faking because if we like the opposite gender we are clearly "an enemy of those who don't", and if we like the same gender we are clearly "just confused and need to be set straight." unfortunately sexuality is now a warzone, and no one is allowed to be neutral in this war.
You should reply and say something like "yeah you're right, I'm not bi, I'm definitely a lesbian" 😁😁 (sorry, I don't mean to be unsympathetic at all. But that would be funny)
I am a woman and I am successful in my career and bosses respect me because they trust my expertise and like how I do my job. So to men I must be the CEO’s niece, or have deep connections, or I am just a suck up, or anything that excuses my success and their lazy entitled asses getting nowhere. And I am not the only woman they talk down to no matter how much better at her job she actually is. Sorry, boys, you need to work hard in order to get places, it doesn’t just magically happens just because you feel special and entitled.
I’m missing a few teeth near the back of my mouth on both sides. People assume I’m either a drug addict or I don’t brush my teeth. The truth is I was never taken to the dentist as a kid, I have a genetic condition that makes them weak and a few were knocked out by an abusive ex. The work that needs to be done is way outside of my budget as a single woman, even with dental insurance (yearly limits are pathetically low). Needless to say I get really tired of always hearing, “You should smile more”. Believe me, I’d love to be able to! I’d love to not have the constant reminder of the things my ex did to me.
Solidarity! I have missing premolars because the permanent ones didn't exist in my head and the baby teeth gave out after 30+ years of service. It sucks to be self-conscious about smiling big. Hang in there. <3
I had so many broken teeth because of medication that I was on. It costs too much when you're on disability and most of your money goes to drs or medicine. In order to get a kidney transplant, I needed oral surgery (risk of infection) I was blessed that my parents were able to pay the $9,000.00 for the surgery and dentures. I don't know what I would have done. Because my husband made too much (by less than$100.00) for me to use low cost options. So, anyone that judges for that reason (Amy reason really) has NO CLUE and is showing their ignorance
Load More Replies...I have yellowy grey teeth because antibiotics as a small child. Not complaining because I'm alive. And I don't have that much change down the back of the sofa
"Ok...Boomer." Got called that once by someone created by a Boomer. My parents were called the "Greatest Generation," they just smiled at that, happy to pay the rent, buy some beer, forget Omaha beach. My Grandparents were called the "Lost Generation," they just smiled at that, happy after a long boat ride they saw the Statue of Liberty from the NY Harbor waves. I'm almost 70, I'm called a "Boomer," I smile at that, pay the rent, buy some beer, and remember the moment I saw on an old B/W TV a black man say, "I Have a Dream..." Yeah, I'm OK with...Boomer.
What’s wrong with identifying as a boomer. Boomer here too!!
Load More Replies...I'd prefer Boomer over Millennial any time. My parents were Baby Boomers.
Keep in mind that the boomer generation staged many protests against racism, police violence, war, sexism, and environmental issues. They kicked off big changes in society. Of course in the same generation were the entrepreneurs and politicians going for profits and power above all. Kind of sounds like what's going with the current generation.
Load More Replies...I'm fat not lazy. Working 70 hours a week in healthcare leaves no time for cooking or the gym.
I'm fat because I'm sick (Fibromyalgia and CFS/ME) I'm not sick because I'm fat. My mobility is very poor, I am always in pain and I can't excersise.
My Mom has an obese neighbour who uses a scooter. She is 70 but has been her friend for 30 years. The number of people who make snide comments about her is outrageous. people will dislike her simply because she is obese and uses a scooter. They have no idea that she was hit by a car while crossing the street. Had both knees shattered. had numerous operations and took meds that piled on the pounds. Her mobility and pain just got worse and worse. Lovely lady, friendly , sweet but people assume she is dirty and lazy.
Load More Replies...I’m also fat and not lazy. My job leaves me not much time to walk around during work hours, plus I’ve had issues since I was a kid with water retention I my legs. This results in me being overweight. I’m sick of hearing doctors tell me I’m in really good health - that they expected me to be suffering everything from bad cholesterol to diabetes. Uh, I eat healthy and try to exercise regularly, thanks. I just don’t have time to run like 50 miles a week to get my legs in with the program.
See im fat because i am lazy... i say this because i see how hard some of people work and who arnt "skinny".. so in my head i think 'why bother'
If for no other reason then to just respect yourself more. You do it for you not because others have failed.
Load More Replies...That because I'm Bi, I'm just confused. That because I would be open to an open relationship, I sleep around and cheat
Ugh, people :( can't believe people would say that about you
Apparently, because of my outward appearance, I am privileged. When in actuality, my whole life has been quite traumatic, with moments of severe degradation. Sorry to have to be contrary
What does outward privilege look like? Not contrary, awesome point of view I want to learn more about.
I get this one. It's when you go on vacations and wear nice clothes so people kinda just assume your whole life is perfect when in fact it is not. Having nice things does not mean everything's going great.
Load More Replies...I think people on the left (myself included) need to be very careful when we talk about privilege. It's true that some people are expt from certain types of oppression. For example, a white natural born citizen in America is very unlikely to be a victim of racism. But the truth is poverty is the original form of oppression and the most destructive. Your race doesnt pay your bills or put a roof over your head. And we need to be careful not to dismiss people's hardship just because someone else might have it worse.
Straight white male. The stereotype entails a whole plethora of things that are assumed about me, from my tastes, to what these tastes say about my identity. Sometimes I feel guilty for the things that are assumed, even though I've never lived in a colonist-imperialistic country, and most of the things that belong to the stereotype don't apply to me.
I've seen your comments and from what I can tell, you are an amazing person you don't need to feel guilty for the assholes
The quiet kid/art kid. people legitimately think I have a hit list.
That assumption is what finally got people to stop picking on me at school.
you're not wrong. i never said i didn't have one. /hj
Load More Replies...As a person in my 60's, I am associated with technological illiteracy. I have learned and used at least 28 different software programs for work (gig economy) and school in the past 20 years and I do NOT need a Grandpad or Jitterbug, thank you very much. Just give me a job, instead of deleting my application the second you see what year I first graduated from college. I have not been able to get a real job since my last company went out of business in 2003. Even got another graduate degree, first in my class and was not even offered any interviews. You younger guys will be SHOCKED when you get old and discover how blatant and alienating age discrimination is. I know I was. We are not all rich and conservative; we are not all ANY ONE THING. Those of us who are not wealthy are almost non-persons in this culture.
I'm in my 60's as well. Started with programing in HS in the 70's (Fortran WATFIV), have built several computers, play around with electronics etc. Still get the "oh you're old. you wouldn't understand this". But it evens out. I supervised more than one twenty something who were complete luddites.
companies will dump you just to get you off benefits in the US. The VP swore he had paid for his last quadruple bypass surgery, kidney dialysis, or cancer treatment long ago. Health problems statistically get very real after age 55, so some companies will get rid of you for one reason or another after 55. It is illegal as hell. A good law firm can put together a class-action suit that will stick and pay if you can broadly document this. That much said, what to do? I know really smart people who have gone into real estate or some other commissioned sales job at that point. Yes, some glorious success stories. Who needs the jerks you left behind?
I am 57 and have not had a job in 2 years. As soon as they realize I am in my 50ties I am no longer a candidate.
My dad has been a programmer for more than 30 years. Still has a gig in his 70's. Yet he;s clueless of how to use most of smartphone capabilities or any other basic technology (registration for a doctor via internet, smart TV, heck even oven sometimes). Even bins for recycling confuse my parents. So yeah, you can work with one type of technology - when you hit with something new, it's hard. I'm a millennial and newest innovations confuse me. Blockchain - as fas as i understand it, it's a fancy MLM; etc.
I deleted all the dates on my resume and got a job right away, no questions asked. Nobody I work with even knows how old I am (60). It's illegal for them to ask.
I’m an Asian woman. People assume I can’t drive or park my car properly.
What? I've never heard that stereotype before. Whoever said that is a weird idiot.
Some parts of Asia have virtually non-existent traffic laws (ever driven in Thailand? 100 in a 40 zone and there are motorbikes EVERYWHERE and three guys sitting in the back of a ute. You essentially have to adopt a highly agressive style to get by) so the switch to Western (read: enforced) driving rules, coupled with the general sexist attitudes, means that many people do indeed assume that Asian women drive like they're intending on meeting God.
Load More Replies...Lol, I thought that shik was said about all of us women? It certainly is by an alarming percentage of men I've known throughout the years, but I've never heard it said specifically about Asian women... One comeback I like is when the insulted woman goes "well, you DO keep telling me this is 8 inches" whilst holding her fingertips 2 inches apart :D
My brother is mentally disabled. When I was a teenager and told new people about this everyone was like "Oh, I'm sorry to hear" or something. Luckily this changed when I got older but in this days it was kinda annoying. Dude, we're not living in constant grief bc off my brother. Off course things have been hard for my parents, especially in the earlier days when I was to young to remember. But we all got along with it somehow. Yes, our family is a little different, but lots of familys are. I had a great childhood and I love my brother with all my heart. He liked (and likes) to laugh, to help doing chores and lot more. Disability does not mean unhappiness.
I've been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, the diagnosis fits but I'm a quiet person that works out her "issues" on herself. I'm also a rape survivor but I've been told by multiple professions that borderliner can't be trusted as a witness. Or that they can't take me on as a patient because we are all too unreliable (took me almost two years to find a therapist, almost 50 kilometers away). My "condition" makes me impossible as a romantic partner or a friend, even though we've never met. Got a single room in a hospital free of charge though (for a surgical procedure) because the admitting nurse was afraid I'd attack and straight up murder a roommate, because when you google "famous people with bpd" serial killers and Adolf Hitler pop up. I swear I'm neither one of them.
People with this disorder are misunderstood and treated very badly by the heart profession.
I always found personality disorders fascinating most the people aren't as bad as the rest of the world believes they are and most the personalities are actually very nice entities.
I hear you, if I tell someone I have BPD they look at me like I just grew an extra arm out the side of my head
I live in the "bible belt" in the US, I must want your unsolicited religious talk. Or I live in the US, I must be one of those idiotic anti vaxxer, anti masker, trump loving, gun loving, war loving, radical patriotic, intolerant of other cultures American asshole.
So true! Even here on Bored Panda. I get called brain washed or a boot licker or a trumplican. I am none of those things. We are not the nuts they see on TV. Those people are on TV because they are doing something crazy for attention. We know our healthcare system is flawed, our government is effed up, and our justice system is screwed up. Most us want to live normal lives and do what we can to make our country a better place. Being told that we are stupid or rude or classless for being American is hurtful.
Same goes. Bible belt in a 'red' state. People can't seem to grasp that one can be neutral or actually listen to scientific advice if you live in the wonderful Ozarks.
Um, Texan. I'm a lifelong Democrat, liberal, feminist, career woman. Texans aren't all idiots.
I have to agree about the us-bashing. I make fun of tx sometimes but I have said it here on BP more than once that americans are in general nice, kind, fun loving people. All countries have a$$holes unfortunately.
I have ADHD, autism, anxiety, am part of the LGBTQ+ community, am a religious minority, am a "gifted kid" and cry easily. People stereotype me as a "special little snowflake". It makes me uncomfortable to have people talk down to me as if I'm in kindergarten. It's so stupid that people think that "Oh-one wrong step and they'll start crying!"
Nobody should ever talk down to you. What you listed sounds like a bunch of egg shells. I would tread lightly around you. Can someone approach you and ask about your situation genuinely and not have you cry? Honest question
Because I'm overweight, I must be stupid and lazy. Because I'm a woman, I have to like feminine things. If I don't want to go out, it's because I'm anti-social. I'm overweight and have been since my son was born. I've had a hard time dieting because the stress of taking care of a child occupies all my time and attention. I don't like feminine things because they take too long, like doing make up and hair. Feminine clothes don't look pretty when they are all stained up with sweat and food from trying to get a picky autistic person to eat something, bathe and not trash the house. I'd rather wear T-shirts and leggings because they are more durable. I don't go out, not because I'm anti-social but because I don't like going out without my husband. Neither of us had a vacation from our son for the first 17 years of his life. And, since I don't get peace and quiet too often, I cherish it when I have it. I don't get that going out with friends. I'd rather stay in for a quiet evening of playing games or watching TV.
also, people need to realize, ANTI-SOCIAL AND ASOCIAL IS NOT THE SAME THING
Is there an exact definition or is more and attitude diffrnce?
Load More Replies...Carol, You are a lovely woman. Just doing your thing is OK. I'm typing this while in sweats and t-shirt and a face void of make-up. I also love just watching a tv show, paint, cook or whatever at home.
Female in I.T. My last job, I can’t tell you how many times I got treated as the team secretary. Had one manager who actively shoved me out of the group because he felt my skills were better suited to administration - I had been an applications developer for 6 years at that point, and he’d never once looked at a piece of code I’d written. Had fun shocking him a couple years later when I got to design a process from the ground up. I’ve also had comments about being the “token female” on a team, and “oh, can’t hire another woman - you two might fight!” Plus the fine line of dressing “too girly” or “too butch”. Interviewing for a new job was heeeeeellllllll, but I finally found a company that had a nice balance (fairly even on genders, good mix of cultures, and very encouraging to all employees).
Maaaan the toxic sh!t women have to put up with in the work force. Glad you found a nice work environment.
Yeah.. the whole “women can’t work together without fighting” schtick is one I’ve run in to far too often. Funny side story about the toxic place. Had a boss message me to ask if I could run to the break room to grab the fresh brewed pot and some supplies (cups, sugar, creamer, etc) and bring them to the meeting room. He said to bring a helper who was male so I wouldn’t have to make multiple trips. His intentions were in no way sexist, though. Contacting me was because he knew I was the only person on the team he could reliably say would be at their desk, and having a male help was due to there being two females on the team, and he wanted it clear we weren’t doing it because we were female. He was so apologetic after the meeting that I just teased him for it for the day.
Load More Replies...ADHD. I have it and I never tell people because they think it's like "oh look a butterfly!"
During the lockdowns when we had to work from home I began to have concentrations issues. I don't know what it was, maybe ADD maybe not. What I do know is I understand a lot more about the struggles an ADD or ADHD person struggle with day to day. If I thought it was 'oh a butterfly' before, I certainly don't now. I'm very glad for that opportunity to learn
It's more like static and you're trying to focus on one thing thru the noise. My daughter has ADHD while her brother has ADD. Neither would be distracted by a butterfly. A spider however would definitely get my daughter's attention. Or a motorcycle XD
Had someone say " oh look a distraction" wanted to punch them in the face. I never tell anyone I suffer from depression or ADHD now. They go from treating me like an equal to treating me like an ex psychotic ward patient.
I suspect I have it. Never had it officially diagnosed but explains a lot why I do some things the way I do, why I have a hard time doing one thing for a longer time, why I have trouble planning things, the dendency to leave things unfinished (sometimes i find almost physically impossible to finish something) etc. And I also seem to be doing other things when someone talks to me,but I actually listen to this person as well. I'm just multitasking or smth.
My hyper doctor explained it like this. The hyperactive isn’t not paying attention to you. They pay attention to everything. Instead of focusing 100 percent on you and the conversation they see 70% of everything around them. I m counting birds or ceiling tiles and the people walking in the door while your telling me about your weekend.
How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I’m gonna go ride my bike.
I’m full blown ADHD and always get compared to a bull in a China shop. Butterfly was never on the radar. Find a way to use it for your advantage, it’s actually a gift.
I am Muslim. You can imagine the list that can be written. I am also white which, the sad truth is, enables me to get by easier than Muslims of darker skin tones. Think airports, etc.
Yep, sadly people react negatively. I call it the fear of the unknown. I say travel to a Muslim country and experience it for yourself. Talk to locals. Immerse yourself. You'll return with a different mindset.
I used to teach jr. college. The biggest difference between the Muslim students and the non-Muslim students was that the Muslim students did not cheat on any tests. I learned to use this as a measurement tool. A good teacher will do a "post-mortem" type analysis of their tests to check for mistakes in questions, questions everyone got correct, questions everyone missed, etc. This is a good feedback analysis to help edit the lectures. The Muslims were the gold standard for this type of review since they didn't cheat. Everyone else sooner or later cheated. I asked one of them about it once, and apparently cheating on a school test is a really big terrible sin to them.
Sorry, but at Uni we had a group of around 9 Muslim students. Every single one of them cheated in the maths exam and were caught. Only case of cheating in my 4 years at Uni thank you. I have taught for years and found Muslims to be the same as any other race, some good, some bad, some terrible.
Load More Replies...No blowback about this please! I’m old now, just turned 65 yesterday, but when I was a young woman I was beautiful. Long auburn hair, blue-green eyes and a nice figure paired with a pretty face. Throughout high school girls were always accusing me of trying to steal their boyfriends if I even said hello. This went on through college and then throughout my life, even after I had married. I witnessed huge fights over me that I had nothing to do with! Men followed me into the ladies room and if I complained about their behavior at work then I was fired. I was definitely a “man’s woman.” I could talk sports, cars, guns etc with men and hold my own in any conversation. This made it harder to make and keep female friends. Even my own mother, who was divorced and dating, accused me of trying to lure her “comb over crew” away from her. 🙄. Did I have a date every weekend? Nope! All the guys assumed that I already must of had a date. I was read that being born beautiful is like being born rich…and getting poorer every day. Truth.
No blow back. This does happen to pretty woman. I am old too and not beautiful just pretty with big blue eyes. Had it happen more than once . I once had a woman freak out and yell " if you want a man find your own f*****g man and leave mine alone" WHY ? I had taken a night school class in my 30ties and commented that her and her husband made such a great couple. After class. As we were leaving. First words ever spoken to them. Sadly not the first time something like this happened..
I admit thinking beautiful girls are lucky. Didn't realize the part about envy and jealousy...
It is also harder for us when we get old and become invisible.
Load More Replies...you sound wonderful... sorry you had to put up with this... Hang in there! hanginther...bc4b2a.jpg
That sucks. Being judged on looks is always terrible. I've been reading lots of posts about too fat, too skinny, too many tattoos, goth, and now beauty. We have to stop looking at the outside and start focusing on the inside. I'm sure you are a nice woman outside AND INside !
Everyone assumes because I am open about being lgbtq+ that Im doing it for attention and its annoying Also this one is a story bout an ass hole from my primary school who was horrid to one of my friends Right so I had this friend and she had anxiety and depression and he said she self harmed for attention and said that she had panic attacks for attention. Then came the homophobic stuff, he siad she came out for attention and was rasist to her sometimes. I absolutely hated him. He said she talked about her period for attention when really she was asking me not to tell any of the teachers about her taking paracetamol for the pain and cramps. He then drew the last straw by saying she was half Asian for attention. Everyone was choosing sides at this point and there was loads of gossip and a hell of a lot of fights. This is the same boy who weeks later told me I self harmed for attention... He doesn't get any kindness from me as you might guess
the stupidity of this guy......how can you choose your race for 'attention'
I am completely slung down (tattoos) they are all colorful and extremely tasteful. None on my hands or face (not that that matters) Every single time I go to a doctor or the ER I get labeled or accused of being a drug seeker. The funny thing is I've never done drugs and I work Law Enforcement. So every time this happens I get extremely angry. I also get followed in stores all the time as if I'm going to steal everything that is not nailed down. I usually like to have a pretty woman moment and go to their competitor or a more expensive store and spend what I would've spent in their store, and then go back and "browse" with my bags from the other stores and when they ask if I need help, tell them "Well I was gonna buy (insert expensive item here) but I found it at (insert competitor /other store) and they didn't follow me like a bunch of assholes and then watch them get all awkward and sad looking.
My little blonde tattooed friend in a puffa jacket and hoodie always got followed round shops. Until she showed her warrant card
I have to know Kung fu, how to use chop sticks, only eat rice, watch chinese movies. I do none of that.
I'm vegan....(please see comments as BP wont let me add more than 2 lines here)
It's not something I generally bring up when I meet people for several reason but mostly because the vast majority of people automatically assume I'm about to start chastising them for not being vegan, and attempt to force them to be vegan with horrible videos and statistics about animal abuse. They also like to tell me why they could never go vegan and recount stories when somebody vegan has been mean to them. Yes it's a big part of my life but there is a lot more to me than being vegan. Oh and being disabled due to a spinal injury people assume I'm incapable of doing things for myself, hells if I was so determined I taught myself to walk again I'm pretty sure I can pick up my own shopping. How do you tell if a disabled person needs help, dont worry wel ask.
I am a vegetarian and I am in shock at how many people are triggered by that. I only mention it if I am offered food that contains meat but WOW the hostile negativity that comes from that one realization. People are such assholes.
Load More Replies...Veganism. Very difficult to hide from others. I went through Vegan phases (didn't last but hey, at least I tried). As soon as it was on the table, others became defensive about their own lifestyle and eating habits. Guess it confronts them with their own choices.
Omg I know, it's bizarre how many people seem to have a massive issue with what someone else chooses to eat or not eat.
THIS! It's not as bad now but 10 or 15 years ago people who ate meat were sooo offended. I never have said anything about it because whatever, eat what you want but people tend to notice when we are eating and I'll order something without meat. Then comes the omg I could nEvER.... or you know people will never stop eating meat. Dude I didn't ask and I don't care. I'm just not eating it, stop being so offended. I'm so thankful it's changing.
They still get super offended, although you're right it's not as prevalent as it was 10/15 years ago. When people realised I was vegan and got weird I used to say, how about you dont tell me why you cant, that the world will never be vegan/veggie, or how extreme I am and I wont tell you about farming and slaughter practices (I used to work in farming) or be a militant vegan and well get on fine. I still get grief from.unexpected corners but I'm too long in the tooth to get very upset but it still annoys the pants off me
Load More Replies...I have an OCD. And when I tell it to someone, their answer is in 99,9 %: "Oh, that's great, you have everything sorted by color?" (or some other criterion) Well, yes, I do, among other things, but otherwise OCD is not fun.
We overuse the term so much, nobody knows what it really means for those who suffer from it.
That I can’t like dragons, blue, cars and fossils. And also not to have short hair. Well guess what, I have a small museum, shaved my hair, am obsessed with dragons and have a car collection. Just simply not true that us girls can’t enjoy these things simply because we are the opposite gender to male.
As soon as I tell most people that I'm Nigerian, they assume that I'm a scammer. I've been taking Spanish classes online and trying to be friends with Spanish people to better understand the language. 'You're Nigerian? Okay.' And they're gone. Honestly, I don't want any money from you. I just want to learn, connect and make friends.
Some people are so ignorant. Don’t worry about the stupid people, many of us aren’t like that.
I'm pan, so people think that I want to date frying pans >:(
is that a mcyt profile pic i see? [insert excited noises here]
Load More Replies...I'm short and suspected to have autism and/or ADHD. People use infantilism on me and it drives me insane, people will always go "awww" and talk down to me.
I don't condone violence but some people need to be kicked in the shin. Twice. Edit: Just realized that made it sound like I was joking about your height. As a person who never reached 5' I know how you feel. My daughter is teeny tiny as well and is speech delayed. People talk to her like they would a toddler.
I used to read books in the bookstore, no one realised that I was really reading, because I was tiny. Great days...
Load More Replies...my parents happen to be on the wealthier side, white people with a large home. as much as i shouldn't complain, the amount of times i've been asked "hey, can you buy me a phone for my birthday? i know you can afford it" or something like that is grating. i have awful anxiety and i always am afraid that everyone thinks of me as the classic rich, blonde, bitchy person that i try my hardest to separate myself from. and a little note to anyone who tries to antagonize kids that grow up like this: don't. they have no control over their circumstances, good or bad. i spent years and years HATING my life because i was convinced i didn't deserve it. don't give kids s**t for things that are out of their control
Tell them that YOU'RE not rich your Parents are, there's a difference. I am NOT well off, but I make do but that's exactly what I tell my kids. I have money you do not. I work for the money, YOU do not. I provide for you and get you extra when I can and IF You deserve / work for it. (chores, attitude, grades that kind of thing) You are not expected to be able to shell out for other people's things.
I wear a pentacle. No I'm not a satanist. I don't worship the devil. The devil is a christian/jewish/islamic diety - not one of mine.
I’m a natural redhead…. but I don’t have a crazy temper, I’m not a witch, and I haven’t stolen any souls!
I feel ya. And sometimes being fetishised. It's not as complimentary as you might think.
INVISIBLE is what you become when you look old!!!
i am bisexual so if course I've had a couple of Karens tell me that i can't like more then one gender and that i should make up my mind and choose one already. The stereotype that we are just confused is utter bull.
Just because i'm asexual doesn't mean i like garlic bread. I do like garlic bread, but not because i'm ace.
I'm ace and frickin love garlic bread, but my parents like it too and they aren't ace
Sort of. It's a joke on asexual subreddits about how garlic bread is better than sex.
Load More Replies...I'm a middle-aged, white lesbian from Alabama. I think the various Karen, Becky, Ellen, and Emmylou jokes are hilarious, though. I'll just steal your girlfriend on my way to speak to your manager about how you won't let me fly my Confederate flag at the tent revival. Yeehaw!
My real name is "Karen".
No. I'm old enough to know that this, too, shall pass.
Load More Replies...I've met nice Karens never bad ones. Aaaand we all know Otter is a lovely person too!
Every Karen I have ever met, have been great, and yes, you are a good person Otter.
Load More Replies...I am comfortable speaking in front of crowds, and good at my job. This can lead people to belive I never doubt myself or feel bad about my self/my abilities. But I do! All the time!
The gays one. Because i'm gay, i'm supposed to go to pride events, or gay places, have a lot of sex, be sassy and funny, go shoping with the gurlzzz, go in night club dancig my A** of etc etc. But i'm the opposite. Introvert, happy with my books and games and never went to a pride event. I get a lot of "you don't seem gay" (wich is a prety rude comment).
I relate. I'm pan but I'm shy and don't know how to represent myself. So I always come off as a cis male or male presenting and even those of the LGBTQ+ community do it on occasion which isn't just rude it's hurtful.
I've never gone to a pride event either, its not required. People expect me to be like super sporty and tomboyish because im "a girl" whos gay but in reality i act more like magnus bane from shadowhunters (minus the eyeliner because i don't know how to put it on lol). doesn't matter, you be you! that's all that matters!
I have a twin and I'm currently one of the newer kids at school, so people get us mixed up, and they often mistake us for being the same person. I also tend to be quiet so almost no one knows who I am, but a lot of people know who my sister is because she is a fun person to be around. so I feel like I live in her shadow
I am a white male in South Africa so I have to be a racist, sexist with a fragile ego and lots of insecurities... Yes these are comments we hear almost every day
Yes, we we're "privileged" whites. Doesn't matter I have 3 jobs to have all I have. White female (single, with 2 boys) in South Africa.
I've noticed this too when I went to SA. NO not all white people are racists in SA.
Load More Replies...I’m a communist apparently.I’m half Russian and my grandparents left due to the horrible state of the country.stop saying I’m a Russian spy!
I'm gay and trans There are lots of stereotypes there The people who know about me being trans ask me when I'm going to start testosterone but they don't understand that I have no interest in getting facial hair or a deeper voice and all that stuff, I want to be androgynous, not masculine, even though I prefer he/him pronouns Pretty much anyone I've ever talked to knows I'm some type of gay and that means a lot of stereotypes, they'll say: - "do you hate homophobes" (no. i'm clingy and lots of my old friendgroup and people at my church are homophobic and i still am painfully in love with all of them lmao) - "im sorry you're broken" (i'm not broken. I'm asexual, it's a valid sexuality. Just because I don't feel any sexual attraction and i don't see the big deal about sex doesn't mean i'm broken?) there are a lot more but it took me too long to type all of that and i gotta go to school so imma end it there
nope, none. that doesn't mean i wouldn't be willing to have sex, it just means i don't feel a sexual attraction to anybody.
Load More Replies...Gay gay, vaguely masculine and straight acting. Apparently I’m weird because I’ve never tried on women’s clothes, don’t use makeup, hate music by Abba/Queen/Steps/Cher/Kylie and want to crawl into a hole when songs like “It’s Raining Men” and “YMCA” start playing. Instead, I like beer, gaming and adventure sports. As well as theatre, cooking and travel. I do not find camp/effeminate guys in any way attractive - I like MEN. And I find young guys wanting to call me “Daddy” creepy as f**k. I’m not yet 40, you little weirdo!
I'm a Russian-American woman who spent a lot of time between both countries. People make all kinds of offensive assumptions, but it usually goes only one way - Americans negatively stereotyping my Russian culture, as opposed to Russians negatively stereotyping my American culture. On top of this, I'm blonde and curvy but thin, which leads to a lot of sexual comments which people feel are appropriate. For example - I get asked all the time if I am a spy, and when I joke that I'd be the worst spy ever the next line is - "Oh okay, trophy / mail-in bride then?" I've had several MUCH older men (think 60s) suggestively tell me that they love Russian women and that their ex-wives were Russian. I also get asked a lot of stupid questions, like: "Why did YOU attack Ukraine? You should get your troops out of there." Okay. Sure. I personally will remove my troops. And of course I get people calling me a communist - my great grandfather was murdered by communists trying to hide a woman who was escaping, but alright. Or people asking me if I love drinking, when drinking is a sore subject for my friends and family due to lives lost from other people drunk driving. Russia is such a beautiful country full of truly amazing people and I just wish people would take the time to learn about our history and our traditions rather than reducing it all to vodka and Putin jokes. Don't get me wrong - I don't mind the occasional joke and will happily be the bartender at parties, or banter with you on politics - it's just that people know very little about my home country beyond stereotypes.
All of the Russian women I have met are just so fun and beautiful - inside and out! And so funny! I can't imagine saying crap like this... I feel like with meeting someone who spends time between two countries, there would be a lot of other things to talk about. I am American and I'd be more fascinated to learn about Russia than anything
Thank you for saying that! And to be fair, I do have tons of American friends who are very curious about my culture and who are genuinely respectful. But there have been some really tense conversations and encounters as well. I suppose those conversations end up feeling very dismissive or reductive, as if they see me just as a stereotype and not as a person, and have already made up their minds about my home country without learning much about it. So I really appreciate hearing that you are curious about Russia and Russian people :)
Load More Replies...I have very severe ADHD. People don't seem to believe it's a real disability. And people get angry with me because I can't magically sit down and be productive on something I'm supposed to do, the way other people can. People judge me for having trouble being on time, making small mistakes or clarical errors, working a lot slower than other people. People think that because I am a good conversationalist and that I'm reasonably intelligent, that I can't possibly have a learning disability. I hate when people talk about medicating kids with ADHD as of "parents are just drugging normal active children because they don't want to deal with them." Like if you met an ADHD kid you can tell right away there's something different about them. I hate when people talk about prescription amphetamines as if it's the same thing as meth or a spooky scary street drug. I'm tired of thinking that my struggles aren't real. I'm also tired of people talking about ADHD as if it's a disease. It's not an I'll was. It's literally how my brain is genetically programmed to be, and outside the context of our fast paced modern world, ADHD isn't always a disability at all. Because of my ADHD I experience the world in a much brighter and more exciting way than other people, I'm creative, intelligent, and can make insights and find connections in ways other people can't. It is not an illness. It's an integral part of who I am as a person, despite the difficulties that come with it. I hate when people talk about it as if it must come from mother's neglecting their health during pregnancy, or it's some disease brought on by pollution. So it really pisses me off when people say things like "you are more than your ADHD" or "it doesn't define you.". Sorry. All aspects of who I am define me and you cannot be "more than" something that you are. I know this language is supposed to be encouraging but what it really says is "this part of you that makes you who you are is just one little bug, not a feature. We love you but we can agree to hate and dismiss an important aspect of your personality and identity.". It's a nasty back handed compliment. What really pisses me off is listening to parents of AFHD kids complaining about how their kids are messy and disorganized and irresponsible and insubordinate and whatever other insult we ADHDers hear all the time. I hate when they b*tch and moan about their kids drive them up the wall, and how raising ADHD kids is such a heavy and terrible burden and "why me god?" ADHDers hear are entire lives over and over again how we are burdens who are unpleasant to be around and often this bullying comes first from our parents. I promise you Karen, being a person with ADHD is way harder than raising a kid with it. At least you get to put the ADHD away when your kid is at school or sleeping. But we have to deal with it all the time. Sorry you didn't get the kid you wanted but you agreed "no returns" when you took that baby home from the hospital. Sorry. That was a rant. But it just is so tiring and hurtful to hear these things over and over again.
mines not to bad, but i'm a nerd. book nerd, musical nerd, orchestra nerd. i also get pretty high scores on my tests (even before we moved) but people don't mess with me because they know that i can probably knock them out with one of the books i carry around (seriously the last one i read was 845 pages) or kill them with my cello.
Nerds Rule! Nothing wrong with being a nerd instead of a pretty boy, jock, or fitness freak with perfect abs. Download/stream "Revenge of the Nerds" for fun. Then download/stream "The Social Network (2010). All the big business successes of the last 30 years started out as socially awkward, introverted h.s. or college nerds (Zuckerberg, Musk, Bezos, Jobs, Gates, etc etc).... see: https://www.ceotodaymagazine.com/2020/01/the-most-powerful-entrepreneurs-in-modern-history/... Update: I just read that Zuckerberg lost $9 billion in the stock market monday... hmmm... more money than I will make ever, he lost in a day... the poor nerd!
I think Nerd was a lot worse back in the 80s and before... For my generation it meant being an outcast and socially awkward. My dad says in the 1950s, it meant "a boy who sniffs girl's bicycle seats"
yeah, usually i take it as a compliment whenever im called a "nerd" i take it as a compliment.
Load More Replies...I am a middle-aged white Canadian woman. I hate that people assume that because I am a white Canadian that I must have a university education, a car and a house. I was raised working poor. My parents are Canadian but were also rained working poor. We lived pay cheque to pay cheque. I still live this way and have a high school education. I cannot and never could afford a car or a home. I am looked down on because of this. People think I am a lazy looser. I have always worked but am working poor. There are MANY people ( especially women) who live this way.
Having moved from Canada to the States and back to Canada, I can confirm that there is an image of Canada there as being some kind of socialist utopia with no poor people, no homeless people, etc. But like everywhere, there are plenty of people that work hard just to get by, both in urban and rural areas. And there is still gender inequality in the workplace and elsewhere. Things are maybe better than the US, but that is a low bar to clear.
Quiet, shy girl. People think I don't want to be friends with them or that I hate them. I don't, I just have really bad anxiety around people
That all autistic people are stupid and I have autism and I find it very very very aggravating to those on the autism spectrum!
People assume that because my face and body are aesthetically pleasing I must not be intelligent. I have been talked down to because I have been thought to be "pretty" since I was a teen, but ironically, I was picked on relentlessly as a child. Like, horrifically bullied. I'm actually a giant know it all because of this and have a MA in Russian and East European studies, speak 3 languages, and had a career in banking for over 20 years. I literally read all the time and consume knowledge as a past time. Think I'm some cute dumb broad who doesn't know about being 4 squared to buy a car? Think again. I feel like I have to always be extra prepared because people assume I'm an idiot based on my looks.
Car sales. I work for a new car dealer, and everyone thinks all of us are shady vultures. Yes, there are some like that, just like there are shady people everywhere. In fact, most new dealers have a lot of training, and the manufacturers have survey's that rate dealers, both sales and service. If the surveys stink, national will be having convos with that dealership, and might even pull it. The dirty little secret is that we want to sell you a car, and we WANT you to be happy, because then we get repeat business and referrals. Yes, we will apply some pressure, subtle and not, we'll use selling skills of persuasion. Just like happens in other businesses. We want to help you. That's why you're there. Let us help you. This isn't the 70's, most are good people.
I’m half French, and people made a lot of jokes like “oui oui baguette frog legs I surrender” but I’ve stopped being bothered by it and now I find them pretty funny.
Being rude & bad at my customer service job because I'm introverted and prefer reading on lunch
I'd prefer a good book over someone's company any time. Did the same in my old job, btw.
I have literally no idea why but I guess I look like a popular girl and therefore everyone thinks I am one and that I'm dating someone, and neither is true in any way.
Trans-woman attracted to women... I'm vegan, don't wear make-up except for special occasions, ride a motorcycle, am super liberal/socialist, and build bikes and work on cars for fun. I am uninspired on interior decorating, and am obsessed with practicality. I do carpentry pretty well. I love sewing, but mostly so I can make sure all my dresses have pockets. I have more than one pair of English Doc Marten style shoes. Obsessed with graphic novels. Can't work myself up to a side-shave, tho.
Usually the one I'm currently reading. Haha. Recently, I read "Flamer" by Mike Curato, and it was touchingly autobiographical. I'm kind of obsessed with Hilda on Netflix and loved the original Luke Pearson series that was the source material. Allison Bechtel's "Fun Home" is a masterpiece that I'm glad I read shortly after coming out. I'm currently reading "Cheer Up: Love and Pompoms" because a friend passed it along, and it's been delightful. "Roller Girl" was one of the best I found in the YA section. George Takei's "They Called Us the Enemy" made me cry and helped me feel less alone in wanting to love a country that doesnt always love you back.... You? :)
Load More Replies..."I love sewing, but mostly so I can make sure all my dresses have pockets" I need to be your friend.
I'm a natural bright redhead; Red hairgirl,carrot top, RED, are names I am referred to daily
That depressed people are not accepted in my society. it's all brushed under the carpet, hidden
when i was like 8 years old me and my family had moved in to a new house it was not the best but it worked (mostly). me and my friend were playing in the back yard and then our racist neighbor who was an old lady sent her dog at us and we ran back to the stairs and she said "if you filthy immigrants get close to my yard again i wont stop the dog next time" it was a terrifying experience for me because i was born in the united states and this would be my first experience with racism and it was not the last.
As a white male, people sometimes assume that I am either oblivious to the privilege that gives me, or that I am hostile to people who not white and male. It extends to being on the hook for anything that white men have done in past 500 years (being the focus of anger as the only white person in a Native American studies class for example). I know - "Boo Hoo" and that these are trivial against all of the BS I don't have to deal with by not being another race or gender, but it is frequent and has become much more so in the last 20 years.
everyone gets stereotyped no matter what race or gender. It's not cool :(
I'm in the age group where I could now be a Karen. Never on my worst day would I treat people the way Karen's do. Who knew there were so many outraged women of a certain age? I think there should be a category called "Not Karen" showing good interactions instead of those infantile tantrums.
I’m covered in tattoos (I’m a tattooist so it goes with the job), scrawny and I wear second hand men’s clothes and no makeup. So, naturally, I have to be either a castrating dyke, a lazy, up to no good welfare recipient or a drug addict. The dyke thing is funny and can be quite useful since I am rarely harassed by would be suitors who find me a bit too scary to their liking and probably not sexy enough. But the other things are infuriating. I’ve worked hard all my life and never was on welfare, ever. And I never did drugs either. But people judge me and put me in a corner without knowing me, just because of the way I look. Because of that I always try not to judge people myself too quickly, it’s easily done and can hurt more than a reputation
I quite enjoy the looks on people's faces when I explain that despite owning several firearms, I'm not the racist, homophobic, misogynist, xenophobic, Trump supporter they expected. Most folks are pleasantly surprised, some are disappointed.
Apparently, I'm a health nut because I'm a Vegetarian (and have been since my childhood). I also happen to be interested in nutrition and I do daily exercise. It's too much for some people. Apart from the jokes, they assume that I only eat organic, shop at expensive health stores and, worse, that I don't allow my child to have something sweet. Heard that a few times. It hurts.
A Pole is a thief. Well when we entered to EU a lot of folks whitout perspective in Poland starts searching luck in western countries. Ant most of them were not the brightest gems of our society. When I was in my early 20 I work in Netherlands during Summer, between semesters at the Uni. There was a plate in every single supermarket in the area, in Polish, that every theft will be punish by €200 fee, No matter how valuable stolen thing was. So during Shopping we spoke to each other in english, because we were so embarrassed about people watching us constantly.
Since I haven’t come out as bisexual yet, my family just assumes that I only like boys. “You got a boyfriend yet?” or “Now you stay away from those yucky boys, you here?” and I’m just like bUt wHaT iF i LiKe gIrLs???
I'm LGBTQ+, EVERYONE assumes I'm straight and cis, cuz I "look normal" even though I have said stuff like my preferred pronouns and preferred name. I just get ignored.
Oh by the way, I'm bi, ace, and demi girl
pick me bitch. I hate it. I'm short. short people sometimes put too much effort into getting attention because they feel like they'll go unnoticed its called the napoleon complex. I hate being called a pick me. its horrible. everyone thinks I'm such a prude and s**t. I'm not! and then when I try to be less of a prude everyone calls me a hoe? its hella f****d up and I pay thousands of dollars year for therapy because of it.
I can be two stereotypes. 1. Shy girl. I can get loud sometimes I guess but most of the time I’m that shy girl drawing in the corner internally pleading you to talk to me. 2. Dark humor and inappropriate jokes all day, making you question what happened to me shyly shoving my face into my book/clipboard and how 30 minutes later I’m talking about how my Pinterest is filled with 2013 cat memes. Well, I also have a sort of stereotypical friend, too. Energetic, super loud. Childish. The kind of friend you probably wouldn’t make nowadays but since you’ve known each other for so long it kinda just works.
As someone who is bisexual I get stereotyped by “not looking gay enough” and also people think I’m just “confused” even in my own LGBTQ+ community
I am left handed. It's silly questions I get. Have you always been left handed and how do you write like that? It's not offensive, just dumb.
Infuriates me that ignorant foreigners assume that because I am a Caucasian South African, I must automatically be a racist.
I'm a Christian so I do not understand basic concepts of science. Oh, and mind is as narrow as the eye of a needle.
I identify as bi-gendered, bi-sexual, and non monogamous. I'm physically female and in a committed monogamous relationship with a man, that is all people see. It's particularly challenging as a manager, female and male managers are held to different standards and treated differently by employees, employers, and the public.
my girlfriend is trans but she looks like her birth sex, and i look like a female so we look like a straight couple and people come up and congratulate me on finally getting a "boyfriend" and "realizing how ridiculous the idea of me being gay was" and i just stare at them and then say "meet my GIRLFRIEND" and smile and they get so embarrassed
I'm bisexual and people think im pan or omni cuz I like more than just boys and girls
Leah Helbig its about how you feel inside not whats in your pants
Nonbinary people? Ever heard of those? Seriously do some research if you can't guarantee people won't outsmart you. And the covid vaccine works. I've gotten it :)
Load More Replies...I eat bonjella and people assume I’m a dentist. I’m not. I’m a part time plumber come zoo keeper.
That god doesnt love the lgbtq me and my family are christians and i recently came out as trans to myself. Fun.. so im kinda stuck in this stereotype of where ill go to hell or something because of who i am. Cant wait to move out. (Just a fyi. My parents are awesome and i wouldnt change anything.)
I have naturally blonde hair and blue eyes. I enjoy fashion and makeup. A lot of people (including my family) have roped me into this stereotype. What people don’t see is that I am a Demi girl and lesbian. I enjoy art and personally hate the color pink. I just really hate that stereotype of girls.
I am Muslim and wear a hijab and niqab (wrap my scarves around to cover my face except eyes). People always assume I cannot speak English, I don't know anything about America, and I have a different home country. I chose to become Muslim, so I grew up Christian, doing all the same things as most Americans. My grandparents are all German, so I am as far from Arab as possible. I know what everything is. I grew up watching the same cartoons as you, I have children just like you, I am just as American as you. Even if I wasn't I don't deserve the stares, disgust, comments, trickery, etc that you give me whether I am in my home or outside. Sometimes the most painful is the actions by people you considered friends or family. It hasn't changed my views on people, but I do have to be more careful in trusting people (a family memeber tried to feed me pork and lied saying it wasn't even though others told me it was).
Oh my so many. #1. That because my parents are well off means i have no issues and live a perfect life --- hell no, i am the least favourite child, as a matter of fact I'm not even sure I'm favoured, i dont get regular meals and when i do it barely fills me, i dont get any extra lessons etc for help with school because i "dont deserve it", went through highschool where almost all assignments had to be digital and to this day have not gotten a computer (got one for a short period of time .. which was way too late to make a difference... and it was taken away from me) didnt get a phone until 17 even though.... again.... everything was almost always digital. no i dont constantly get new clothes, no i dont go out, no i dont get extra help with anything. i cook, clean, and take care of childcare for younger sibling. get treated like crap... ... .... i have all sorts of medical issues that dont even get a glance from my parents. just because i put on a brave face and come out means my life is perfect and that immediately gives u the go ahead to disregard my call for help or complains. #2 That i am going into business studies because i take after my father and his way. No. I am majoring in Marketing and Management because i have been forced into it. i have no choice in what i do. its what my parents say i do. #3 that i am thin because i choose not to eat alot. ..... i lost alot of weight due to domestic stress and abuse when i was 14 and since then i havent passed 85lbs. sometimes i might reach around 90lbs but as fast as it gets there it goess down back. i am not being fed in my house, when i do get food the portion sizes are so small , its basically what i got when i was around 9. i've learnt to make it work. i cant help it because i dont have an allowance and i am not allowed out the house. #4 that i wear glasses because i cant see - i wear glasses that help when im out in the sun. i hate when people feel its ok to grab my glasses off my face and wave infront my face like a maniac to see if i can see. DONT GRAB PEOPLE'S GLASSES!! #5 that i love to yell at people and im super mean - no i am not. if you behave like an idiot and treat me like crap i will first off all ask you to stop nicely .... if not i will ask not so nicely. if i react badly to something you did its probably because you did something bad. i am not much of a confrontational person but if you go overboard i wont let it slide so easily. #6 that im not a feminist because i like pink and have a boyfriend. the logic behind that amazes me. I am not with my SO because he controls me or provides for me. i am with him because i love him and see a future with him. he does not put me down but empowers me to be an amazing woman and push forward i like pink because i like pink. how does that invalidate me being a feminist. I'll quote Amanda Lovelace on this “here is nothing unfeminist about the girl who chooses the ball gown & the prince. there is everything unfeminist about those who try to shame her for her choices.” ........... #7 that the reason i did not become valedictorian for my for my highschool back when i wrote exams was because i had a boyfriend - - no way!..the reason i didnt do my best is because i was suicidal for my 2 final years, i had zero extra lessons , i was not the teacher's favourite, i was going though alot of abuse at home, my boyfriend who they all blamed is the reason i am still alive, he saved me from myself, i used his computer to complete 80% of my assignments and material, he was the one who had extra lessons and came back to school and thought me, thus why i passed maths and IT, he was the one who helped with everything and pushed me to study, he was the one who learnt my subjects , eventhough he didnt do them, just for me to pass.
i get this! but, my life was the reverse in that my home was not abusive; parents didn't control me; didn't have boyfriend & was a tomboy; middle class military family. i left home after high school thinking i knew it all & ended up somewhere between decent existence and hell with a few stops in purgatory. all by my own doing and poor decisions. thankfully, never into drug/alcohol. finally got my crap in a sack, returned to school, got not 1 or 2 but 3 degrees & had a decent career until my health went down (not by anything i did, btw.) still, when i tell people some of the things i did which, actually is kind of amazing, people get the impression that my folks didn't do their job. um...yes, they did. those people need a refresher course on free will + late teen/early adult angst = very strange, possibly dangerous paths.
thank you to the person who started this thread cause that was alot lifted off my chest!
I was a homeschooler growing up and I loved being homeschooled, but when I was about 13 or so I noticed that there were stereotypes associated with not going to public school. It wasn't too obvious but I had noticed that they subconsciously assumed that I was: a. not as intelligent as they were b. sheltered and lived under a rock. c. antisocial. I HATED a lot of the stereotypes that came with that, although they are starting to change. :)
I was born in Austria and when my family moved to NZ when I was a toddler, I had to learn English quickly. I watched lots of American TV shows and ended up developing the accent. I have been asked by about 98% I've met since I was 5 questions like "What state are you from?", "Are you American/Canadian?", "Do you know my friends from America?", "You are so quiet for an American!", "Wow, you are so smart for an American!". Please know, these are the FIRST things strangers say to me when they say hello to me... Because of my voice, I have had people immediately assume I am a loud, lazy, selfish and stupid American just because they heard me say "Hello" with my accent (Sorry Americans but this is what most countries think of Americans...)
I (14F) have been called a nerd my whole life. I used to wear glasses purely for the fashion because I thought they looked good (weird i know) and I've always been a quick learner. I was labelled as 'gifted' from a young age due to my learning capabilities. In year 2, I was placed alone in my own spelling group, and remained the only one in it right up until year 5. I have never been physically attractive, and probably never will. I have never left school extension programs. I was bullied every year of primary school other than prep. I enjoy reading, and I'm writing a book. HOWEVER. I do not have it easy in school. I might be a quick learner, but that means I entered high school with zero study school, and I am affected more than others by failure. Everyone has high expectations for me that I have to meet. And my school guidance counsellor suspects my intelligence stems from high-functioning autism, paired with moderately severe anxiety. It also means that people don't like it when I express myself artistically, saying that I 'shouldn't waste my intellect'. It's basically been enforced that I have to go to university to study, even though I want to be a graphic designer, and art school would be the only form of Uni I really want to do. My intelligence also sets me apart from others, and ever since prep kids didn't want to be around me because I have always liked rules and tend to overcomplicate games and fun activities. It's only this year that I finally found friends. So, to all the people out there that wish they were naturally smart - believe me, you really want to be careful what you wish for.
my 7 yr old grandson is on this level. and, with the lockdown/home school right now, his abilities and what he is doing is putting him way above his peers. thankfully, his parents, great grandfather, and myself have sat down and discussed the pros/cons of early advancement already. we are all on the same page that we don't want to sacrifice his social/emotional development for the sake of academics. it is a very fine line because we also don't want to encourage and nurture his abilities. having raised a 'normal' child as well as one that is autistic, i can say that the concerns of a 'gifted child' and how to do the best job of parenting them is harder.
I'm really glad they're being proactive and helping him develop. Cheers 😊
Load More Replies...As soon as someone finds out that I have SPD (sensory processing disorder) they immediately tell me all the things that they CAN do because they don’t have SPD. And when I am in one of my attacks from it they often call me dumb or stupid when all that’s wrong with me is that I can’t process certain things like normal people do. I can’t be around flashing lights and music, so I can’t go to concerts or party’s and people think that I’m not cool because of that. And cicadas are also a trigger and people look at me like I am crazy when I all of a sudden breakdown outside during the summer. I have literally worked my life around this disability, and people don’t think it’s real. All that’s wrong with me is that my brain is wired differently and if you can’t accept that, you can go to h*** for all I care.
Female, overweight/obese (diabetic), low income, many short term jobs, homeless riffraff (live on boat), learning disabled (ADHD), diabetic, hormonally imbalanced PCOS, nerd, geek, dork, weird, straight, married (with name change), childless. So, pick a few. None of these things make me who I am, and none explain how much worse it could be if I gave up on proving myself for the awesome, artistic, intelligent, and hard working human I am, nor where I could be if I gave up.
the stereotype of both age & disability. i have a mobility disability as well as being a partial old fart. but, i still like to do things that i can do. just because the body is aging doesn't mean the mind isn't as young as i think it is. even to the point of looking ridiculous because, at my age, who the hell cares? things just as simply as going fishing. and, dating? oh, well, all you older men who may be looking for something younger to 'keep up' with them...good luck! (not meaning all older men do this.) but, remember...you being older means your batteries are getting low. while on the subject of dating, a disabled person is also dateable, whether limping, with a cane or in a chair. it's very rude and disheartening to see others and sometimes myself become invisible in society because of what people think we can/can't do or if we make for good company, etc. this is not a bitter-laced post but something that i actually realized watching other disabled people being treated this way.
Luckily, transgenders are relatively new, there are not much stereotypes so I can make my own future
A few....... I've shaved my head since even before i was going bald....... i got tatts...... tbh even my own daughter said i look scary if you didn't know me..... but tbh i'd be much more at ease not looking this way because i'm tired of twats and biggots assuming i must think the same as them about gays, people of colour, etc.......... Doesn't help that I don't just have a resting bitch face..... i got a resting bitch voice too
What does the phrase "profoundly gifted" mean? It came up in a couple of posts as a negative thing.
What is negative about it is the way we're treated sometimes because of other people's assumptions and jealousies. That we can't make a normal mistake without being judged and belittled. That people think WE think we're superior or something and act (un)accordingly.
Load More Replies...As soon as someone finds out that I have SPD (sensory processing disorder) they immediately tell me all the things that they CAN do because they don’t have SPD. And when I am in one of my attacks from it they often call me dumb or stupid when all that’s wrong with me is that I can’t process certain things like normal people do. I can’t be around flashing lights and music, so I can’t go to concerts or party’s and people think that I’m not cool because of that. And cicadas are also a trigger and people look at me like I am crazy when I all of a sudden breakdown outside during the summer. I have literally worked my life around this disability, and people don’t think it’s real. All that’s wrong with me is that my brain is wired differently and if you can’t accept that, you can go to h*** for all I care.
Female, overweight/obese (diabetic), low income, many short term jobs, homeless riffraff (live on boat), learning disabled (ADHD), diabetic, hormonally imbalanced PCOS, nerd, geek, dork, weird, straight, married (with name change), childless. So, pick a few. None of these things make me who I am, and none explain how much worse it could be if I gave up on proving myself for the awesome, artistic, intelligent, and hard working human I am, nor where I could be if I gave up.
the stereotype of both age & disability. i have a mobility disability as well as being a partial old fart. but, i still like to do things that i can do. just because the body is aging doesn't mean the mind isn't as young as i think it is. even to the point of looking ridiculous because, at my age, who the hell cares? things just as simply as going fishing. and, dating? oh, well, all you older men who may be looking for something younger to 'keep up' with them...good luck! (not meaning all older men do this.) but, remember...you being older means your batteries are getting low. while on the subject of dating, a disabled person is also dateable, whether limping, with a cane or in a chair. it's very rude and disheartening to see others and sometimes myself become invisible in society because of what people think we can/can't do or if we make for good company, etc. this is not a bitter-laced post but something that i actually realized watching other disabled people being treated this way.
Luckily, transgenders are relatively new, there are not much stereotypes so I can make my own future
A few....... I've shaved my head since even before i was going bald....... i got tatts...... tbh even my own daughter said i look scary if you didn't know me..... but tbh i'd be much more at ease not looking this way because i'm tired of twats and biggots assuming i must think the same as them about gays, people of colour, etc.......... Doesn't help that I don't just have a resting bitch face..... i got a resting bitch voice too
What does the phrase "profoundly gifted" mean? It came up in a couple of posts as a negative thing.
What is negative about it is the way we're treated sometimes because of other people's assumptions and jealousies. That we can't make a normal mistake without being judged and belittled. That people think WE think we're superior or something and act (un)accordingly.
Load More Replies...
