When we think of romance, we might imagine the feeling of butterflies in our stomachs, romantic, sunset dates, and Valentine's Day. But, let’s face it, the real one-weird-trick to make someone fall in love is to make them laugh.
Partners from around the internet share the hilarious, cute, and sometimes unhinged things their wives or girlfriends have done. From pranks to wonderfully amusing idiosyncrasies, these people have documented the best moments. So get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites, and be sure to comment your thoughts below.
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Smartest Wife Ever! We Were Both Pooping On Opposite Sides Of The House. I Called Her And Asked For Toilet Paper. She Yelled For The Dog And Then Told Me To Call Him
Only a relationship goal if you have more than one bathroom LOL
Load More Replies...you just annoyed my cat. She was sitting on my lap, all comfortable, nice and purring. Then I laughed out loud (literally, Laughed. Out. Loud) My lap was no longer still and comfy, cat got annoyed at the sudden burst of movement of my laughing my a*s off.
Wife Sent This After Picking Up Our Dog After Surgery Today. Says He's "Still Under The Influence"
I picked up my Great Dane after her spay surgery. She was walking like a drunken sailor and it was so funny!
I Made My Husband A Vasectomy Cake. It’s A Lemon Cake With Swiss Meringue Buttercream
Yeah, I had a vasectomy . . . but my wife tells her friends that she had me fixed.
I know it isn't but the decoration in the middle sure looks like a used condom.
To be fair, that's what I thought too and had to go back. You got downvoted for that???
Load More Replies...While it’s not exactly surprising, humor is often overlooked as a vital component of any happy relationship. Research into the subject confirms that being funny isn’t just a core component of attracting a mate (without which many stand-up comedians would have to give up all hope), it is also important to maintaining a healthy, long-term relationship.
The simple explanation is that if you laugh at your partner's jokes, chances are you find it easy to communicate with them. It’s not rocket science to make the connection between solid, honest communication and a relationship that lasts.
I’m So Happy I Didn’t Break Them
I did it when I broke my dad' glasses way back when...lucky me he was having a nap and "rollled over" and crushed them himself 😉 crisis and beating averted
Load More Replies...My mom locked me in a car by accident at the grocery store & was panicking. It wasn't hot & it was a small town, but still. She called my dad, who was a teacher, and had to leave class. While she was waiting for him, she noticed that the back door was unlocked, so she locked it & closed it back. He was only 10 minutes away & that was before seat belts, car seats & putting your kids in the back seat.
I called my husband from the mall parking lot because I'd locked my keys in my car. He was not happy, but was on his way when I realized the back door was unlocked. So, like any good wife I locked the door and waited.
I did that! But it was the keys to the lawn mower because I hate mowing the yard.
We Cannot Keep Any More Dogs, So I Told My Wife Not To Get Attached While We Foster. I've Been Calling Him "Inmate #003". Today, She Bought Him This Outfit
Actually, fostering is great for the animal(s) because when they get adopted, then can help more.
Load More Replies...When my daughter was a young teen we had a pit bull wander up to our house. He looked hungry, and had probably been dumped. I told her to stay away from him because he might be aggressive. A few minutes later I looked around and she was sitting cross legged on the ground, with the dog lying across her lap on his back, with her rubbing his stomach. He was home.
Awesome ! I bet your girl had a best and loyal friend ☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️
Load More Replies...Hhhahahahaha he is just doing a pack ☺️☺️☺️☺️. We donkeys love dogs packa ☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️
Load More Replies...Yup! I would keep the dog! I don't care if Wife sends me to sleep with him on the couch!
I'd struggle not to get attached to that, obviously, very good Boy... and I'm more of a cat parent.
Take my advice: you need to be like my youngest brother, the math major, whose wife is a total dog person. (He is rather meh on animals, TBH. The only "bad" thing I can say about him!) When they were raising their three sons, my brother told my SIL they could have a combination of five dogs and boys, that was the limit. As my nephews got older, she asked if she could get more dogs once the boys started moving out. Which was NOT a good idea, in his opinion! He revised his limit from maximum number of dogs to the maximum poundage of dogs (100 lbs.) Since one doggo is a dachshaund, that still allows for two bigger dogs (standard poodles). THAT's the way to keep more dogs from being brought home! LOL.
I'm Pretty Sure My Girlfriend's Favorite Hobby Is Getting My Dog To Pose Using My Computer
Last pic: "Mum! You know Dad is going to be cross for messing with his pc, right?"
Indeed, other studies have found that there is a pretty strong correlation between the frequency and intensity of one’s laughter from a loved one’s jokes and overall satisfaction in the relationship. So, if you truly are funny enough, you might be able to joke-brute force your way out of a failing marriage. Ironically, this might mean that married comedians must be funnier than divorced ones.
Girlfriend Said It Was Therapeutic Working At The Humane Society
“That sounds stressful. Have you tried pushing a bunch of s**t off a table?”
Oh, I stopped listening hours ago Susan, but please, continue to bore me with your problems.
How My Girlfriend Sleeps
I only have 2 drape over me at night and I assure you.. it's only the cats who actually sleep.
Snap. I have who either sleeps on my hip or on my right and another who sleeps ony left. I spent half the night moving them so I can turn over.
Load More Replies...They let the soft can-opener have that much of their bed? She must be pretty good staff!
Looks awfully familiar. But I'm single (and intend to keep it that way).
I'm confused. Isn't this the proper way to sleep? Have I been doing it wrong this whole time?
My Wife Doesn't Want Me Snacking Late At Night, But Here Are These Two Goons Caught Red-Handed Eating My Noodles Behind My Back
Took this picture as evidence right before I called the police. I hope they have chopsticks in JAIL.
Similarly, while it’s best if a joke comes from one of the partners, laughing together already comes with a number of benefits. Like any shared experience, it builds solidarity and camaraderie. Laughter, unlike traumatic events, is also generally an indicator of a good time with few (if any) negative side effects, except perhaps a shortness of breath.
My Wife Put These Halloween Decorations Behind A Door In Our Basement, Now I Need New Underwear
Ngl, I though this was just two women having fun at a Halloween party when someone whipped out a camera...
The Get-Well Basket My Wife Made Me For My Vasectomy Today
Yeah that's a keeper. Curious though(I know it's easier for men and should be more acceptable), would she be "thrilled" If he did the same for a tubes tied party? Sincerely curious. I don't have reason to believe it's equitable. Edit for clarity: I would get one asap. Not tryna have a kiddo myself. But I feel like this same token of affection would be pandering or something worse if it were reversed. Am I incorrect in this?
Load More Replies...I really dropped the ball(s) when my husband had his a few months back. Can I get a do-over please? Maybe the doctor could just go in and poke around again so I can do some of these fun things. Granted, I did take care of him and wait on him hand and foot when he was recovering....but I feel I really missed some good opportunities.
Wow. I just told my husband to suck it up because the pain he felt was NOT the same as passing two watermelons through the birth canal.
She's A Keeper
I think she may well have been still under the influence of medication, or ‘totally off her tits’ in the medical jargon
even if my husband and I are fighting, if a pet pops somewhere, I stop the fight and point out the cuteness of the pet.
When I woke up from surgery, still away with the fairies, someone handed me my phone. I sent my boyfriend a five minute video of me making the bed going up and down and purchased Madonna's The Immaculate Collection on CD (I don't have a CD player). I have no memory of doing either.
That being said, humor tends to help a relationship where both parties see it as humor, but there are some nuances. For example, self-deprecating humor or making fun of someone, apparently, does not have as positive of an effect on one's partner, unless they very specifically prefer these sorts of jokes.
My Wife's Sense Of Humor Is... Juvenile
I'm sure she can rustle up some "facial" tissues. ;-)
Load More Replies...Awww yeah! In my case, Wife always say to me that she's married to a 10 y/o kid trapped in a large frame 😅
Load More Replies...My Girlfriend Left This Warning For Me On My Pillow
I should not read funny posts in public..people will think something is wrong with me if I keep laughing so much..
My Girlfriend Made These For Work To Celebrate Halloween And They're Seriously Freaking Me Out
Wow how did she make the teeth? I want to make these, they look amazing.
Looks like the plastic vampire teeth that you see in bags around Halloween.
Load More Replies...I Told My Fiancé I Got Him The Perfect 30th Birthday Cake. It Wasn’t What He Expected
32 this year! (I’m a 1992 baby too and my Gen z coworkers always tell me I’m old)
Load More Replies...Wow, it went from age 40 down to 30 when you get the over the hill s**t?
Reminds me of my late father when he brought flowers when my late mother gave birth to their 3rd son (in a row). He bought a funeral crown. LOL. She didn't appreciate. The thing is, my father bought it because it was her favorite flowers and there was more than in a bouquet. It might have been on sale too; idk.
*evil grin* My SIL this year hits the 30 mark and this is just perfect! All her (and my brother) pranks against me...uff! A little pay back is in order
My Girlfriend's Late Night Idea With The Guinea Pig
Reminders On My Wife’s Phone
Lmao, I could have used this when I ate way too many blueberries and it came out black.
Same! I was like shite.... then... ahhh.... okay black it is then.
Load More Replies...Thankfully someone warned me the first time I had Red Velvet cake.
I remember a similar heart attack. My son wanted a boy in a RED sleeping bag for his birthday when he was, maybe 6. You can imagine what the result of all of that red food coloring!
She Gets It
I found it a bit of a red flag in hindsight when my MIL kept referring to one of hubby's exes as "she was amazing, she was just like me'.
Every time I'm like "My in-laws are so cool they are so chill, caring etc how did I get so lucky.."...I'm like, Oh because they have all the qualities they passed down to their son lol. It's weird though because I know a lot of awesome people that had really toxic families so I guess it really does come down to luck.
My husband and I literally say we picked the parent we are closest too but have the most issues with and…yeah accurate as hell. We even say “alright dad!” “Alright mom!” When we get annoyed with each other now because it’s so close at times.
Yeah, when our parents met for the first time, our dads sat down, started talking and several hours later, had to be called multiple times for dinner. 32 years later, we're still doing well.
My Wife Is A Nurse And This Is Her Lunch Box
https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/1534378562/human-organs-insulated-lunch-bagbox-red?ref=share_v4_lx
Load More Replies...I was a respiratory therapist for over 20 years, blood gas kits had biohazard bags in them, we would take hem out and use them for our sandwiches we brought in for lunch. New employees would give us the strangest looks when they saw us at lunch.
My Girlfriend Just FaceTimed Me From Inside The Restaurant Bathroom
Actually, it’s the door handle to the bathroom door. So she was stuck in the bathroom.
Guy claims she’s his girlfriend but is wearing a wedding ring. Something doesn’t add up.
“911, what’s your emergency?” “So… the bathroom door handle came off when I tried to open the door.”
To paraphrase the old ditty, "Oh dear what can the matter be, my poor girlfriend got stuck in the lavatory."
I think there's an old 40s song about old ladies stuck in the lavatory. Not that she's old.
Today Is Grinch Day In My Daughter's Class At School. She's Been Giggling Uncontrollably Since My Wife Did Her Hair
I'm so oblivious to how to do amazing hairstyles like this....how do you get it to stay up like that?
I'm wondering if there is a small ball in there or something.
Load More Replies...My Wife As Gollum
Left My Wife Unattended At Target And She Sent Me This
I ALWAYS want to do this at places and my boyfriend always gives me discouraging looks or says “oh, come on.” XD I’m almost 42 and still a child, I guess.
Am i the only one thinking the red socks are mixed with the white ones, some are facing the other way, the employee has to fix that mess and if their supervisor sees it first they will take it off on the worker for not noticing. Please don t do that at shops.
I can justs imagine a little kid walking by and asking Grandma what that is about. She be clutching her pearls!
My Wife Showing A Grouper Fish His Own Picture
I scuba dive. I love taking straight on shots if fish. I wish I could show them and get their reactions.
I have that same expression when looking at other people's cell phones. . .!
I have that expression when looking at pictures of myself
Load More Replies...How My Girlfriend "Handled" A Spider, And Is Too Scared To Clean It Up
I'm pretty sure, the spider isn't having a time of their life either.
I wonder if people have considered what spiders eat. You know those other bugs that you don't want around either? That shaving cream isn't going to hurt a spider BTW. Some of the other things on the other hand like hair spray to glue them in place or setting them on fire, will of course do it. But frankly if you are going to kill it, just yack it with something, much more merciful than torturing it or gluing it in place so that it starves to death.
"so, I'm in the slippery-wall-room, mooching along, when one o them pink mountains comes along. Next thing I know, I'm a marshmallow!"
Wife Adds Notes To My Packed Lunches. Today's Edition
My husband just told me just this morning "Hey Beautiful", even after 35+ years. Nope, he doesn't need glasses...
Load More Replies...I asked my first husband (30 years) why he NEVER EVER told me I looked nice. His response was "I don't want you get get a big head." Thus ex-husband. My new husband of 12 years is just the opposite. It took me a while to get used to it.
My Boyfriend Asked Me To Find Art To Hang Above The Toilet
We've got a piece of art next to our toilet, that features a vaguely anthropomorphized cat peeing against a street tree that has a hanging sign that says "Ici", while a gang of vaguely anthropomorphized dogs come to... do something about it? My grandmother bought it in Paris (by the Sacré-Cœur), France. It has always hung in a bathroom.
My Boyfriend Asked Me To Remind Him To Buy Butter. I Think I Did A Good Job
Can we just take a moment to recognise the dedication and satisfaction of the timing of these texts 🙌
I Asked My Wife To Take A Picture Of Our Fence To See How Much Got Done Today. This Is The Photo I Got
Saddening to see the dog on a tether, I hope it was only while the fence was being done.
Is pets pooping in your yard considered normal in America?? Why aren’t they trained to poop outside of the house/yard? I mean no offense, but I wonder why anyone would prefer poop on such a beautiful lawn instead of walking the dog?
Yes it's very normal here. People with backyards usually just let their dogs out back to go potty. It's easier then having to walk your dog 6 or 7 times a day or however many times they want to go out. Then we scoop the poop in the yard as often as needed.. or not depending on the household.
Load More Replies...My Wife Made Dinner For A Family Tonight. After Asking If They Had Any Allergies, The Husband Said “Bees”
Skimmed Through My Pregnant Wife’s Food Log Over The Past Couple Of Weeks And Can’t Stop Giggling
Why, it's almost as if she *knew* you were going to read through her food log and get on her case for eating a fried chicken wrap. Dude why are you reading your wife's food log?
The Wife’s Addition To Our Automatic Cat Feeder
My Wife Is Looking Very Excited To Cut The Cake
“All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, A light from the shadows shall spring; Renewed shall be blade that was broken, The crownless again shall be king.”
Is that what was going through her mind as she was preparing to slay the cake, you think?
Load More Replies...Technically, Anduril, Flame of the West! Narsil was just shards, and didn't have runes down the blade.
Load More Replies...I think that is for if she gets cake smashed in her face, there will be repercussions
My Wife Just Went Back To Work And Thinks I'm An Idiot
Oh my word, I couldn't be doing with this. Let him learn on the job! Otherwise you just give yourself more work to do. The kids' might even end up expanding their palates!
Right? My kids just ate what we ate (once they were old enough to, obviously) and they are significantly less picky than their peers now.
Load More Replies...If both kids are getting rice, meat, and corn ... why can't they have the same thing. Why make it so complicated?
Because....preschoolers. One of mine wouldn't eat anything on a plate if any food was touching any other food or if there were two foods of the same color next to each other (possibly because he might not be able to see if they are not touching).
Load More Replies...My Girlfriend Is Selling Her Car And That's One Of The Photos She Chose For The Auction
My Wife And I Have Been Placing A Skeleton We Brought In Different Situations For The Other One To Find. Needless To Say, This Is My Favorite One So Far
I don't buy the plastic skeletons at the store as they hurt the environment. I go for the organic route instead.
at first i was like, "youre no fun." and then i was like. "oh. OH."
Load More Replies...We once saw a skeleton at a thrift market and decided to buy it for gags. Otto was a very welcome halloween guest for some years. P1040849-6...0f34c9.jpg
I have a 6 foot tall, glow-in-the-dark skeleton I bought from Home Depot and of course he's naked Skelly. Skelly has a prominent place in each year's Halloween display. I love my 6 foot tall, glow-in-the-dark Skelly.
My son put a skeleton hand on the christmas tree to hold a decoration, mainly did this to annoy his sister. It was so funny we left it up all xmas
Asked My Wife, Mother To My Children, To Write My Name On The Bottle I Bring To The Gym
Wife has effectively told all people surrounding you that you are not "ready to mingle" with just one word.
My Wife Had Cookies Made To Celebrate My Vasectomy
Those are some well made cookies. I wonder if the bakers get so many orders of these ones that they’ve got it down to a science now
I wonder if the bakery is next to the client or something.
Load More Replies...My Wife Made Me This Beautiful Arrangement For Valentine's Day
Moved Our Extremely Heavy King Bed Headboard For The First Time In 5 Years. Guess Which Side My Wife Sleeps On
I will say, there are massive hoards of hair ties in a secret location somewhere in our house bc of our cat; it will be interesting when Mt Thievery is finally located.
Came Home From Work To See My Girlfriend Had Updated Our Letterboard
If she's made that sign, she probably wants him to propose. Probably an unpopular opinion, but I think most women in hetero relationships want to be proposed to.
Load More Replies...We were together 12 years before we decided to get married. Focus on the being together right now, not the future - the future is a foreign country for all of us.
She's very precise about your time together maybe you should be a little afraid
5,301 days since I met my partner. Google is your friend! ‘Days since xx/xx/xxxx’ it’ll do all the maths for you 😀 PS I’m not engaged either 😳
Load More Replies...Gurl, it's been nearly 10 years. Make peace or move on if you really want to get engaged. Because it will be another 3000 days until you get married.
Man, we'd been dating for 3 months when he proposed, married 7 months later. 32 years later, we're still doing fine.
I lived with my partner 56828 days before I agreed to get married again. No that is NOT a typo. Were grown adults previously married and did so due to pandemic in Mar 2020. He proposed 6 months after we met. Eiyher propose to him, accept no marriage or leave. Simple.
I Decided To Learn To Crochet By Making My Husband A Stocking, But I Got The Scale A Little Bit Off. But The Sheer Size Of It Has Made Us Laugh So Much That It Is Well Worth The Mistakes
Imagining Santa trying to fill this and thinking how far behind he's getting
Picked Up A Fancy Cake For My Husband On Our Anniversary
Actually, it's funny. If you have the kind of relationship where you enjoy being a smart a** to your partner, it's ok. That's how I saw this. Not everything in life is serious.
Load More Replies...This should be upvoted. That would be awesome. I would be sweating all day.
Load More Replies...This would be my husband and I. We forget almost every important dates in our own lifes.... But never our grandchildren....
I had our wedding date engraved on my wedding ring.....I am notoriously forgetful!
I Thought This Was Funny, My Husband Did Not
He gets a wife with a great sense of humor and all she gets is an ungrateful husband. Let him live in uncomfortable drawers every day for a year and see if he can be as lighthearted.
indeed! I have to convince my wife to wear comfortable panties. I have purchased her comfy ones as a gift before because damnit she looks good in everything.
Load More Replies...If you're a guy and don't think this is funny because you think it means she doesn't care about being sexy anymore or something... grow TF up.
I am confused. I just see underwear. What is difference?
Load More Replies...I love you to be comfortable... in whatever you chose to wear. As Forrest Gump's momma said "Sexy is as sexy does."(or something like that)
My Wife And Her Friends Are Having A LAN Party To Play Stardew Valley
I'm up for it! *grabs the watering can and the pickaxe* Penny will stay with our son, Jade. (Our daughter will be named Amethyst)
When you play multiplayer do you compete over the town singles? Not that I would need to worry about anyone going after my guy, as it is Harvey.
I always go after Harvey! I mean, he goes up in a hot air balloon even though he's afraid of heights!
Load More Replies...My Girlfriend At The Dentist
My Wife's Childhood Attempt At Drawing The Baby Jesus
My Girlfriend Slipped This Under The Door While I Was In The Bathroom
My Wife And Her Class Made "Groundhogs". I Can't Stop Laughing
My Wife Bought A Mirror Sticker For The Garage Gym. Looks Great
My Wife Always Comes Through With The Best Valentine's Gift
Found This Note From My Wife On The Bathroom Mirror. I Turned Around Expecting A Trick Rubber One Or Something
My Wife And Dogs Are Sleeping In A Chaotic Pile
Yep. This is pretty much me, just add an 80lb bloodhound German shepherd.
In An Attempt To Help My Husband Complete His Chores, I've Made Him A List Of Side Quests
Indeed - how much more work is she willing to create for herself just so he does his fair share?
Load More Replies...mmmm part of me loves this, part of me is like, maybe he should be trustworthy enough to handle this without this kind of prodding. from the title it sounds like she's asked him to do these things before and he still hasn't, so she's trying a new approach, which is obviously not okay.
My Wife Draped Her Hair Over Our Son's Head To See What He Would Look Like
Wife Cut Her Own Hair Today, Almost Gave Me A Heart Attack Upon Opening The Trash Can
My Wife Sleeps Like This
My Wife Decorating The Kids' Room
My Girlfriend, Attempting To Use Siri To Add Olive Oil To Our Shopping List
My SIL used Alexa to add a loofah to her shopping list, Alexa confirmed with “I put “do a fart” on your shopping list" It's childish, I know, but I almost pee'ed myself laughing.
When we first got Alexa I woke up to my brother laughing in the middle of the night. I forgot I had programmed it to say "That's right, stuff your pie hole " or something to that effect at the usual time he would get up for a midnight snack...timed it perfectly.
Load More Replies...My Bored Girlfriend Decided To Style My Hair. Leg Hair
My Wife Is Trying To Teach Patrick TMNT, But He Really Wants To Play Godzilla
My Wife Bought Me This Because I Behaved At The Grocery Store
Quick change it to Lego, without the “s”, before the Danish people come down on you like a ton of Hygge.
Load More Replies...My Wife Asked Me, "Which Color Do You Like Best?"
Him id go with eggshell but butercream just looks beautiful... yet again the light grey is original :3
Forbthe Aussies out there: The cream, the bone, the white, the off-white, the ivory or the beige?
Paint companies go to a lot of trouble, making so many paint colors. I hope they don't give up on us, though.
My Wife Playing Skyrim, Her First RPG Ever, For The First Time. I Love Her Dearly
I manspread like that as well when I'm gaming 😂 I just keep my drink closer by
My Wife Got Me A Cake For What I Thought Was A Big Accomplishment
Id probably be upset at that but it looks like u found it funny
My Wife Had Me Hang This Up In Our Bathroom And Didn't Get Why I Was Laughing The Whole Time
Oh god you're so right!! And it doesn't even have to be YOUR cat, apparently! I was facetiming my sister the other night, and she had her phone propped on the bed in front of her. Her cat jumped up and stood between her and the phone, inadvertently giving me a perfectly framed close-up view!! 😂
Load More Replies...Disk Coral. The only coral species capable of movement. (Scolymia lacera)
Looks like like blue waffles - they delicious, loads of recipes if you google it.
Tried To Sneak A Picture Of My Girlfriend Multitasking
My Wife’s Reminder Of Her Colonoscopy Appointment
Day 1. No food. Drink nasty laxative. Spend several hours cramping and spewing coffee colored firewater. Day 2. Sedation, procedure, spend the next few hour kinda loopy. Day 2 isn't bad. Nobody likes day 1.
Load More Replies...Some of us have a three day prep. One week prior my diet is truly bland. Blame my genetics.
My Wife Did Good. Perfect IT Nerd Shirts
My Wife Got My Father-In-Law Socks For Christmas With Our Faces On Them
I did this for my husband a few years ago except I used our dog's face instead lol
Apparently she also got "the world" a few pairs of socks with your faces on them!
My Wife Couldn’t Open The Bag, So This Was Her Solution When She Bought The Potato
Me. I meal plan for the week and sometimes just want a baked potato.
Load More Replies...I Love The Notes My Girlfriend Leaves On The Fridge
My Wife Just Asked Me If I Broke My Drill
I’m a woman and I understand why you put that tape on. And I find it hilarious 🤣
Husband Said We Have To Get Rid Of The Bees Living In The Metal Part Of Our Kitchen Window. I Don't Agree With Him
Me neither, little fellas need all the help they can get. 👍🏻
If they get past the metal however they can really f**k s**t up inside the walls
25 Years Ago My Wife Was Featured In The Newspaper Enjoying Pancakes At The 5th Annual Kiwanis Pancake Festival
My Girlfriend Wrote I Love You In My Banana
My Wife Made Me A Grocery List
Make sure you add a bottle of lube, you don't want people thinking you're a vegan.
My Wife Went To The Flea Market And Brought Home A Wall Decoration For The Bathroom
How My Fiancée Eats Her Pumpkin Pie. There's A Pie Under There Somewhere
I Bought My Wife An Xbox, And The First Thing She Does Is Power Wash A Van
My Wife Made This For My Desk At Work
I imagine them moving up and down with this bibibibiii-sound 😅 edit: fat fingers 🤭
The Wife Had To Print A Test Page
Asked My Wife To Write A Grocery List For Me
From OP Zoomlight OP · 2 yr. ago On mobile but I'll try. Fruitys = Fruits / Veggie Vegs = Vegetables / Crunch Munch = Snacks/Chips / Hunks of Flesh = Meats / Cow Leaks = Milk / Baby Rocks = eggs / Frozen Potatoes Stones = Tater Tots / Hunks of Flesh Slices = Lunch meat / Bounties of the Sea = Fish / Old Cow Leaks = Yogurt & Cheese / Fatty Sticks = Butter / Cucumbers of Hate = Pickles / Bone Water Chick = Chicken Broth / Hot tub veg water = Veggie Broth / Cat crunch = cat food / Dog Munch = Dog food / Awkward sponge bean = tofu / Sad leaf party = salad / Squishy wishy liquid= juice / Soft brick = bread / Soft brick w/hole = bagels
Lol.. for years I used to put "shark meat" on our grocery list just to amuse my wife.
Wife Didn’t Want Anything. I Got Home, Went To The Bathroom, And Came Back To This
Sat next to my partner last night, she’d eaten her small share of chocolate, I still had my full share, naturally I asked if she’d like a mini egg….. nope she says, I’ve had mine…… I know but do you want another one?……. No, definitely not, they are yours……. Are you sure?….. left the bag open next to her….. you guessed it, my share became ‘our share’, I do love her 😀❤️
As Someone Who Times The Arrival Of Their Parcels Carefully, This Gave Me A Chuckle
My local guitar shop does "wife friendly invoices" that bear no relation to the actual cost.
On online shopping company has the option instead of a gift message, an alibi option that says “congratulations on your win, enjoy your prize”
Wife: "I Left Some Cookies For You On The Counter". The Cookies On The Counter
My Wife Is Embracing Her First Summer As An American Citizen With Enthusiasm
A Military Wife's Welcoming Sign
For me, it's the flower crown with the flag outfit, which feels like she couldn't choose between anti war or pro war, totally ignoring the fact her sign is about intercourse.
Load More Replies...Brit here. How is the outfit not appropriate? Genuine question.
Load More Replies...Today Is December 7th, But According To My Wife’s Advent Calendar, It’s December 25th Tomorrow. Happy Christmas Everyone
My Husband Asked For One Goofy Thing Over A Year Ago When He Started As A Delivery Driver... Today It's A Reality
On My Way To Surprise My Boyfriend At The Airport (He’s Never Been To Prison)
This Wall In My House Is 28'W x 10' Tall And My Wife Hung Two 4x6 Pictures Up
My Wife Is Short And Didn't Want To Get The Ladder
After Telling My Wife About The Penny Trick To Tell How Much Tread Is Left, I Asked Her To Send Me A Picture Of It, And She Sent Me This
My Girlfriend Pressed Her Face In Fresh Snow
Okay good....because if it was real I'd feel like I was missing out on some kinda magic snow skills.
Load More Replies...It is not going up. It’s just hard to tell, and yes it is real.
Load More Replies...My Wife's Solution To Stop Me From Hitting My Head On This Light Fixture After We Moved The Dinner Table
We Just Got This Pot. I Lost The Battle, The Intrusive Thoughts Won. Skyrim Hack. Should I Send This To My Hubby While At Work?
My Girlfriend Complained Of The Toilet Seat Being Up, And I Told Her She’s The Minority In This Household. This Was Her Reply
I don't get why is it such an issue. Put the seat *and the lid* down. That way everyone has to lift and lower something.
Yep. Plus cleaner, or so they say, to flush with the lid closed. And if you have pets they aren't drinking from the toilet (not that there's anything wrong with that).
Load More Replies...Wife Said She Found My Favorite Popcorn. I Didn't Get It, Took Me About 5 Minutes Then I Found It
This Is Fantastic. He's Got To Be In A Big Pink Cardboard Purse And Pop Out Of It Randomly
My Pregnant Wife Is Eating Apples Dipped In Pickle Juice
I Asked My Wife What’s On Her Mind, Super Juicy
You will 100% s**t yourself while giving birth, quite possibly on your baby. Your significant other, or whomever is in the room with you will likely lie to you and say "of course you DIDN'T!" thus perpetuating this reality in which so many people are unaware of the almost certainty of this occurring. But it happened.
I Introduced My Wife To One Internet Community Today. She Has Become Useless
Bought A PS5 Controller For My Girlfriend, And She Did This While I Was Asleep. How Should I Proceed?
If you still need to look at the button symbols before pressing them, I imagine you're not very successful at gaming.
AS if you called the middle button options and not start
My Girlfriend Uses Teen Spirit
When my gf (now wife) had to go away for a few weeks, she stuffed her pyjamas with clothes and laid the sculpture of herself on the bed, so I'd still be able to snuggle up to her. Sounds sweet, but when I walked into the bedroom, I got the fright of my life, thinking my gf had been decapitated!
My husband, boyfriend then, always ran from the bathroom to the bedroom to get his underwear from the drawer. I mean, RAN, as if someone was chasing him. It seemed he was scared to see himself naked. So one day while he was in the shower I emptied the drawer. The look on his face when he found out there was nothing to cover his manhood with.
1. How did you know you were both pooing? Do you synchronise your poo routines. 2. Who doesn't check toilet paper supplies before pooing? 3. Why are you both pooing with the doors open?
When my gf (now wife) had to go away for a few weeks, she stuffed her pyjamas with clothes and laid the sculpture of herself on the bed, so I'd still be able to snuggle up to her. Sounds sweet, but when I walked into the bedroom, I got the fright of my life, thinking my gf had been decapitated!
My husband, boyfriend then, always ran from the bathroom to the bedroom to get his underwear from the drawer. I mean, RAN, as if someone was chasing him. It seemed he was scared to see himself naked. So one day while he was in the shower I emptied the drawer. The look on his face when he found out there was nothing to cover his manhood with.
1. How did you know you were both pooing? Do you synchronise your poo routines. 2. Who doesn't check toilet paper supplies before pooing? 3. Why are you both pooing with the doors open?
