70 Of The Funniest Parenting Tips From Moms And Dads Ever

*Turns off internet and sees dishes to wash appear, clothes to laundry, floors to vacuum clean, tables to dust*.... *Turns on internet again 0.0;*

Also, check if all insurance documents are complete, the vaccuum cleaner has a fresh bag, and repair equipment is at hand.

My nieces are allowed to borrow as many books from the library that they can carry.

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yes, lying will better equip them to handle life

no, but it is funny

Hide & Seek. You go hide, and I'll count. (to 1000!)

I do not think drunken kids will make your life easier. Quite the contrary. :P

100% TRUTH.

Really? We ask for "funny" baby advice and you come up with a Trumpism.

Unfortunately, the same sentence from an adult's mouth increases the radius at least 2-fold.

ITS TRUE XDDD

Does that work? My easter experiences is that the particularly hard to find eggs will NOT be found by the children...and the adults will afterwards search them, fearing the rotting smell that would come after a few days. Well, socks do not rot, but I doubt this will win you time in the end...

It's only #MomWin until she realized dad has exploited the situation by handing sweats to all of them.

It could be worse. Paint, super glue, matches...or not coming at all, just grabbing the stuff...

or don't kill spiders in the first place!

Probably kids can use the "unplug Internet" pareting tip on you in turn.

haha, that's the best one

After all, it is daddy who faced the charges, not them. :D

Parenting pro tip: do not put a naked toddle onto the couch without anything waterproof, disposable below.

What happened to his hand?

Parenting pro tip: do not do this if you want to get home before you are hungry.

Genius!

that one can come back to bite you...because once they learn to skate...they are gone and your arm is no longer needed as a crutch.

Ugh, learned that the hard way!

And be sure to cook coffee before that!

Goal #1: feed the kids!

hahaha, i do this with my 3yr old, but i suspect that she knows im lying sometimes ;-)

That's a whole tragic story in one sentence

i dont see how this is a parenting tip.

This could also be under "cat-keeping tips".

Unless you were J. R. R. Tolkien, in which case this was probably actually true.

Works on adults too

Pro-pro-tip: never bribe your child, as the next bribe will at least doubled. Kids do not need to have had math in school to be street-smart in such regard...

99999999, rough.

I don't get this one.

:( Such a sad day....

tee heeee

Not if they have a tablet of their own...this tip has a clear age limit.

obviously this Abe guy doesn't have kids ;-)

Unless u were never told the story of a chubby man bringing gifts

Or Legos. Yeah, especially never Legos. Whimper

If you define "soon" as 60 years, this is a realistic bet.

Parenting pro tip: go to the fridge when they are finally in bed!

And lotion and tell you wife I'll talk to you again in 18 yrs

Parenting tip: plan a little bit in advance. It will save you transforming your home into a storage hall.

Parenting pro tip: if your kids learn to read they will after a while cease bringing you the same book to read to them every single morning.

yep :-D

If I put a blender onto my head, it horribly hurts.

It helps to add jazz hands and high kicks.

It's because you have to say "I wish the goblin king would come and take you away, right now".... I mean i haven't watch that move dozens of times...

I thought not leaving her anywhere near scissors was pretty much parenting 101 to begin with :D

Where's the video, I gotta see the video!!

In Europe, this goes for Nutella.

Parenting pro tip: rejoyed when you realize that even though they are soaked afterwards, a waterpark will keep children entertained for a long, long time.

Abe Yosbe, you frighten me.