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Many parents describe parenting by basically not describing it. It’s magical, indescribable, they say. There can be some stigma attached to honestly venting or sharing the messy and chaotic reality of having kids. But for every tale of exhaustion, kids provide hilarious deadpan commentary for the most mundane things. 

Fortunately, this Instagram page gathers the confessions of millennial moms who want to vent to the world about the reality of parenting. So scroll down and enjoy these funny, honest tales about raising a child. And if you want to see some more collections of confessions, check out Bored Panda's other article here.

#1

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cerinamroth
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I will do anything in my power to make sure my children feel this way because I never did.

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As tiny humans, kids are as varied as adults, so parents often find themselves needing to employ a variety of tactics to keep them in check. These styles will, inevitably, vary from culture to culture and will also often reflect the parent's own upbringing. In the American middle class, at least since the end of the Second World War, parents have often employed a more permissive style, which allows their children to feel independent and not constrained by constant rules.

Some of the responses and activities here indicate that the children do feel relatively free and unconcerned. Though kids also tend to not really know boundaries very well, so it could simply be that childlike innocence. Regardless, the permissive style has its detractors, as children often end up with poor self-discipline and tend to lack structure when approaching work and other activities. 

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#6

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VonBlade
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This has been on BP loads, and I laugh every time because I can't read it in anything but Susan Calman's voice.

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In some cultures, it is very common to have full-on discussions with a young child and baby. These discussions do tend to be pretty one-sided, with the parent telling the baby about itself. In West Africa, parents will also talk to their babies, but mostly about other people. In both cases, the child does benefit, however, as engaging with language helps them learn to speak and feel included in family conversations. This is why young children, seeing or hearing a conversation, will join in with their own babel, as they believe this is simply what one does in the situation. 

#7

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cerinamroth
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This makes me think of my daughter, then aged 4, who looked at me closely before nursery one morning and said: "Mummy, are you wearing make up today?" And I said, "Yes, actually, yes I am wearing a little bit." And she said, "You need more."

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#9

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Stary_cat
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mum just says make your own and occasionally gets the ice cream and the spoons

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When kids get older, hopefully, they start to develop the ability to actually converse with others. Then comes the inevitable ocean of questions about practically everything. Why is the sky blue? Why are adults bigger? How does a car work? Can dogs understand us? While vital for a child to understand the world around them, this can be exhausting for adults who feel like they are in a never-ending interview. Some cultures circumnavigate the issue by emphasizing observation as the preferred method of learning. In other words, some parents have actually, successfully pulled off ’just sit in silence and watch.’

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#12

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Fizzer
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And here's your kid that didn't want to come but now doesn't want to leave.

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Others try to preempt the onslaught of questions. This makes sense, as a parent is an authority figure, so if you can’t tell your kid how gravity works, why would they believe you about anything else? In Indigenous American and New Zealand communities, storytelling is often employed to keep kids entertained and to explain to them how the world works. Though a particularly curious kid will probably end up asking hundreds of questions about the story itself, so it’s not a foolproof approach. 

#15

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Detroit Citizen
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Raising four kids, I can attest, sometimes you just gotta take it when its offered from your wife. Dont remind her she has spit up in her hair, or that you just witnessed her clean up some unholy messy something or other. And pro tip for guys: Change the sheets before bed, before being told to... iykyk...

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#16

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A Jones
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's okay to say "no", especially if requests are unreasonable like wanting to "paint the car" or "two desserts". It's a context thing. It's also okay to say "yes" to things if time/money are okay. Like a trip to the playground or going to the library.

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#18

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Mrs Irish Mom
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1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

3 days of labour and an emergency C-section and 12 days in hispital after that, 15 days off for me yay...

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#22

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Susie Elle
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Same, but my mom would just go for a random bike ride in the evening for like 20 minutes by herself.

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#24

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Michelle Brandt
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've come up with clever ways to hide that I'm swearing. My husbands sees through them and immediately starts laughing.

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#25

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Coralinea
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My nieces, at 4+2 still think the screen only comes on when brushing teeth. No idea how my brother pulls it off.

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#26

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Sarah SH
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Like an avocado in that I contain a lot of fat. Unlike an avocado it is not the “good fat.”

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#28

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Eric Lewis
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Because the people that work at those places don't have kids and get to sleep in lol

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#29

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Eva Kašu
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1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

..but when you ask them about their favourite, daddy is da best :D

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#30

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cerinamroth
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'll take it, as long as you stay on the other side of the door.

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#32

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Sad Quokka
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No dear, their bodies fill themselves with poo until they finally explode

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#33

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Susie Elle
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This went for all moms in 80's and 90's movies - dad messed everything up and mom had to clean up the mess afterwards but somehow SHE was the no-fun parent.

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#37

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JelliTate
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh goodness! That’s the mom I was vs the mom I am now!! There’s a 23 year age difference between my youngest and oldest!! 😂😂😂😂

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#38

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cerinamroth
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When the perky young dental assistant asks if I floss every night, I sometimes have to hold back the manic laughter.

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#39

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sky
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

thats me when im trying to comfort my 12 year old sister when she is sick ( im 16 so we are not that far apart but i like to comfort her when she is sick)

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#40

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K W
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Omg this is my kid every day lol. Or he's like the kids in South Park when Chef asks how their day is and every time they say "bad".

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#50

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