It often feels that some people have an entitlement to think that some rules just don’t apply to them. Sometimes, it comes in the form of an unfair policy run by the workplace, schools and universities, and other kinds of organizations that treat people differently. Don't let me even start with how the job market behaves towards men and women, where the inequality and unfairness is so obvious you need no magnifying glass.
So when someone asked “What double standard are you tired of?” on r/AskReddit, it spiraled into an illuminating thread with people sharing unfair examples in our society that they are totally fed up with. Think of basic laws not applying to people with money or power, star student athletes who seem nearly untouchable, or entry-level jobs that require experience—there’s a lot to uncover.
Scroll down below and be sure to share your thoughts on the double standards that have been bugging you lately in the comment section!
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People telling fat people to lose weight but then getting angry at us when we dare show our face in gyms and laugh at us while we exercise, get upset that companies make work out clothes for us because it’s “promoting obesity”, or making comments on every little thing we eat even if it is considered “healthy” when a skinny person who has a metabolism as fast as the flash could post themselves eating an entire pizza and people would be like, “mood” or “that’s so cute!” Or get angry at us for legitimately just existing. I’ll post a picture that isn’t promoting binge eating or ANYTHING of the sort, it’ll be just a picture of me in a dress, and I’ll be bombarded with vile comments for… posting a picture.
I've been big before, and people definitely treat you differently.
I was a chubby kid, then thin most of my life. I'm fat now. People who didn't know me when I was thin are not as nice to me and the only thing that's changed is my weight.
Load More Replies...I agree 100%. Basically we're shamed for being overweight and then ridiculed the second we make ourselves healthier or lose weight. The amount of times I've been smirked at when ordering healthier food or openly laughed at when trying to exercise really does make it harder for me, it's almost like people think we can lock ourselves away for a few weeks and emerge looking like a Disney princess. We don't need everyone to cheer us on and applaud as we work to better ourselves but space and respect are a good place to start
I'm so sorry you've been subjected to that. People can be so cruel.
Load More Replies...In March this year my doctor was getting worried that I was walking 3klm a day and not losing weight and so was I. The weight was gained after brain surgery 6 years ago. Oh dear I have late onset autoimmune diabetes. On the correct weekly injections and oral medication with no change in diet or exercise which was healthy anyway I’ve lost 21kg. Think before you judge a *fat person* because you have no idea what they have going on medically.
Totally agree. I was on meds that messed up my thyroid. Caused weight gain. Came off the meds and lost the weight. People do treat you differently and you are already likely to be dealing with self esteem issues.
Load More Replies...This needs to be at the top. It's so hard to exercise if people are laughing and snickering. Even power walking on the street invites abusive comments
I think people would be respecting you. There are always going to be immature ones who laugh at everything because they’re insecure
Load More Replies...Friend of mine who lives at the gym told me he witnessed some guys making fun of a larger woman in the gym. He and his friends told those guys off and gave the woman workout advice, encouragement and even showed how some of the machines work.
Very nice of your friend. That's how it should be!!
Load More Replies...I've been to several gyms and haven't seen that. On the contrary, overwieght people are admired for their efforts and encouraged. As I was overweight myself, I was prepared with aggresive replies in case someone would have said anything to me or about me... but it was not the case.
Maybe you've been lucky. I've definitely encountered abusive comments when I was overweight, and after losing weight and getting fit I actually had one of the workers in my previous gym trying to mock "fat people doing yoga then eating chips instead of doing cardio" while we were chatting. I'm now slightly overweight after having kids, but I exercise 5-6 times a week and don't eat junk food, just cook fresh food at home. I found myself often having to justify myself to people- I'm fitter than I look, I do HIIT training, burpees, tuck jumps, weight lifting, I don't drink alcohol, I eat fruit and veggies and cook fresh food for my family, I'm just not a skinny person... But why should I? Each to their own.
Load More Replies...After having a autoimmuun disease called good pasture I cant loose weight no more. I dont eat much, because of diabetic meds I feel sick while eating lots of food or getting diarea (not sure if i wrote it right, english is not my natove language) But still I gain weight and docs have no clue whats going on. I really hate it that people look at you and just go "you should eat less mc donalds" or any other stupid comment. People stop judge people they dont know..
I love seeing large/obese people at the gym as I know how hard it is to come through those doors and take your health into your hands.
Religions preaching love while inciting hate filled conflicts.
And preaching about generosity to the congregation while not doing anything for the poor or victim of natural disaster etc..
There are many religiously affiliated charitible organizations in the Top 100 Charities in the U.S. according to Forbes, such as St. Jude Children's Hospital (#5), the YMCA (#7), Lutheran Services in America (#14), Catholic Charities USA (#17), and others, showing some do practice what they preach. https://www.forbes.com/top-charities/list/ Not that you need to be religious to be charitable of course.
Load More Replies...If your religion incites you to hate other people... maybe you should reconsider your religion.
Anything good and pure can and has been twisted by evil. There is no denying how many humans have desecrated their religion for personal hubris or power but for every one of those there are 999 who are generally trying to live a Godly life filled with nothing but love. The only thing evil needs to triumph is for a good person* to do nothing. That 1 evil person can cause the crusades while 30 million souls following the same faith are actually following its tenets. I have no problem with condemning that man but please do not condemn the 8 year old girl who wants nothing more than her next door neighbor whose a different color, religion, and nationality to be her friend because she learned compassion at Sunday school.
My question is why they need Sunday School to teach them compassion in the first place? It’s the job of parents to install basic human and societal values. There’s no reason at all to delegate this to (or indeed credit) a supernatural entity.
Load More Replies...And paying 0 taxes in the US but using all the same resources as us tax payers. Roads, police, ambulances, schools for their parishioners, etc
I think this differs per church, some are very loving and welcoming to all people, while there are other churches or religious groups that are very hostile to outsiders. Nevertheless, religion shouldn't exist, it causes mostly harm
I know right?! Christians killing in the name of Jesus? Like have you read the Bible? Jesus teaches love and tolerance...
Politicians being able to openly violate the law and nobody does anything.
If the punishment for a crime is to pay a fine, that means its legal as long as you can afford it.
Politicians are not for the people, but for themselves, the system is broken, and the people are trapped under a group of bureaucrats getting rich, while society suffers.
Did they just tell a joke about a coloured person or did those old farts just decide to be the boss over a woman's body. I'm guessing both.
I see Ajit Pai in the corner laughing about how he's going to destroy the internet.
Load More Replies...Popularity has power. If a racist politician is popular, he'll never get in jail, or anything else that influences their career
we say nothing but we cough in the general direction of a certain orange chap.
Load More Replies...Since the US was founded on genocide and slavery, I have absolutely no respect for any politician. Most just pad their pockets with special interest money.
Idk why we assume just bc we allow someone to be in a position of power, that they're suddenly infallible.
Why is dental insurance diffrent from "health insurance" aren't teeth part of my overall health wth!!
There is no reason or logic behind American health care - only greed.
Also separated in Korea. But some places will accept installments (no interests). And some places will offer cash discounts. Still expensive, but they do take negotiations. When I was a broke student, they also did the best they could to fix me up with the least costs possible.
Load More Replies...Yes this is insane, and it makes good teeth even more of a class thing
This. So much. When looking at health we should not separate what goes on in the mouth (or the eyes) from the rest of our body...yet we do. It is beyond outdated the way we approach health as parts instead of a whole.
And if a smile is part of my uniform, why is it not paid for by the company?
Because back in the day, dentistry was considered surgery (performed by your barber). Source: https://www.mkdmd.com/dentists-arent-doctors-heres/
Yes, but taht was then, and this is *now*. We know from medical studies that dental health is vital to overall health, ergo, it's medical. Physiotherapy is covered as "medical" but they're not doctors, either.
Load More Replies...Yes, ikr! I was told if I didn't have braces I would have complications with my jaw and gums later on in life~
And where most NHS dentists don't take new patients anymore.
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Your boss getting angry if you're a couple minutes late but then expects you to have no problem regularly staying on 2+ hours after your shift is meant to end.
Now that more people are working from home, it's gotten much worse. I often get emails after 11 at night or on the weekends.
Off the clock is off the clock. Don't answer those emails till Monday morning.
Load More Replies...Toxic bosses also come up with manipulative justifications for extra work. Like, if you need to work overtime, it's because you are inefficient and have a poor time management (so it's fault). Don't buy it.
Sounds like the boss has poor training skills.
Load More Replies...I educate people on this regularly. It is as simple as emphasizing that you are assigned a specific schedule and that your duties outside of work REQUIRE punctuality just as much as your employer. We do NOT hesitate to remind them of these facts each and every time. It’s not the employee’s responsibility to ensure coverage for shifts or positions outside of their own, it is the manager and those higher up. NEVER fail to remind them of that in a professional manner, and you will never find yourself being abused in this way again.
2 weeks notice. Why do I have to give a two weeks notice or more when my company can fire me at anytime for no reason at all.
No unions, and "hire and fire at will" laws. Bizniz is king.
Load More Replies...So many times I was clocked out, coat on, purse in hand to leave and someone stopped me for help. We joked about having to sneak out to leave work. But I always tried to help because there were usually customers waiting and the so called managers were never around or just clueless. It's also why we did not feel guilty about shopping on our phones on the clock. "Reclaiming my time!"
Oh yes. Try it when you're a volunteer. Hello? I'm not even paid here....
For the record I am 15. I work in a grocery store. I once had my boss come up to me and said they needed me to stay an extra hour and a half as the store was getting swamped with customers, and we had 4 cashiers on shift. I said ok, just let me inform my parents. Look on my paycheck net time I get it, I was paid extra for that time (1.5x my typical wage) and I was given a free coupon for the food court in the store. I feel lucky.
I purposely come in 10-15 minutes late every day because I'm technically finished at 3pm, but I end up here until 3:30-4:00 almost every day followed with phone meetings after
Parenting double standards. The gender of the parent does not make the parent. Dads are not "babysitting" their children, they are parenting.
Tied with the classic stereotype that men don't care about parenting and see it as some kind of chore. Doubled with tge new stereotype that men showing care for children are creepy
Or not being smart enough to know the basics of parenting.
Load More Replies...Solo dad here, I'm fed up with people commenting " Aww how cute'' or telling me I'm brave or deserving an award for just raising my daughter and just basically doing every parent job
This. Having to take time off work to care for my kids and being asked why my wife can't do it, or taking paternity leave...
Yes, and stop giving fathers a stand ovations because they changed a diaper or went to playground. Women do this everyday and much more and not even a thank you receive sometimes.
First of all, men don't expect standing ovations for these things. They are simply being parents. Secondly, you disapprove of gratitude towards men while seeking gratitude towards women.
Load More Replies...A man that takes care of his children/child is sexy, a woman putting him down for it...not so much
This goes along with the narrative attack on men in general. Like unless you’re a father or teacher, Any male doing something with a child is automatically a pedo. So almost no opportunity for a innocent role model scenario moments anymore. Which is ridiculous. To be fair this works to my advantage as I hate children and never want to be around them , lol.
Billionaires calling poor people lazy.
If all Amazon workers were lazy, would Bezos have billions? Methinks not.
Pre pandemic I relied on Amazon because of surgeries. Those people work so hard and their drivers are 99% amazing people! I'm glad to hear their workers are getting better pay and benefits than they had before. I just wish Amazon made it easier to find items made in USA or the Americas.
Load More Replies...Billionaires can waste gobs of money flying penis-rockets to space, but if a poor person buys a $4.00 latte everyone loses their minds.
I'm poor because I'm lazy and I don't "get up and grind and hustle"...I work all week for minimum salary and that has to get me through graduate studies and help support my folks...so sorry if I can't hustle like you can.
Yup. And job shaming needs to end. Doesn't matter if you're a cleaner, barista, clerk, fast food worker, work at a call center. As long as you're not breaking the law and earning an honest pay there should be no shame.
Yeah. I really hate that. I have a bachelor's degree, but I also live in a small town. I don't have the education to be a teacher at one of our schools, but when I applied to work at our local mental hospital, I was seen as over qualified.
Me, a non smoker, being told off for being 5 minutes late to work. While smokers spend 30 mins at least a day on smoke breaks.
Non smokers can (and should!) take breaks too. It’s very healthy for your brain.
Yep. I used to set phone reminders for these breaks when I was working at the office.
Load More Replies...It is the break that makes the smokers better workers. Not the tobacco.
Woman at an old place I worked at always moaned that she wasn't allowed to take breaks but us smokers could. Even took it to HR. HR said that she could clock out and take breaks if she wanted (we used to have to clock in and out at the start/end of day as well as lunch and could accrue "flexi-time" for time off work, breaks etc). She was like "Oh I'm not doing that. I'll lose my time I'd built up". Took a bit of explaining to her that's exactly how we were able to take the smoke breaks in the first place
I lied once and said I smoked just so I had a reason to walk out of the building for 15 minutes. Never smoked in my life. Just needed a break. (USA)
I smoke, but I do not do it at work. Have no cigarettes with me, because smoking is my private pleasure, the same that I am not reading a book at work or have a beer.
That’s how I was when I smoked and was an employee. I would only smoke if I had a reason to leave my desk like for lunch or on the car ride for work off-site. Not because I cared about my office mates but more because it’s just inconvenient to stop doing work just for smoking and coming back all smelly.
Load More Replies...I don't know where all of you people work that you get more than the standard two breaks and lunch - where one can just get up and leave to go do as they please. I have had one job like that before in my life, and it's because I was self employed! Otherwise, everyone got the same amount of break (usually two ten minute breaks) per day.
My mother was a smoker but also a very hard worker, she did work the equivalent of 4 to 6 people. Many years ago her co-worker complained about my mother taking a quick smoke break (2 or 2 minutes every hour and a half/2 hours) and the boss invited her for a talk in the office. The boss said something about her "unfair" smoke breaks, to wich my mother replied that she could either keep having her quick breaks and do the work of at least 4 people, or she could be banned from smoking and quit, and have to company pay for extra staff. About a month later the complaining co-worker was fired, turns out she did less than half the work, which was easy to begin with. I get that non-smokers want breaks, they should get them! 2 or 3 minutes every hour and a half is very reasonable. Just as long as everyone does the same amount of work. Smokers can't deliver less because their habit takes time. Also non smokers might even be more productive if they can take a few minutes a couple of times a day
Celebrities lecturing about climate change when they have the carbon footprint of a small town..
apparently the cop26 footprint for jet fuel is something like the entire carbon footprint of a small nation.
Load More Replies...Flying in a private jet to come tell me to lower my carbon footprint. Bloody Hypocrites.
Flying in private jets to go to a global summit about saving the environment!
Load More Replies...One celebrity changing their carbon footprint will not solve this. People complaining about an individual's carbon footprint play right into the hands of the corporations that are mostly responsible for this by getting people to argue about things that don't really matter in the long run. The oil executives are currently being questioned about this right now and knew for ears this was a problem and did nothing, but yeah let's get upset about Individuals.
Over 400 private jets flew in for the climate conference !!! i mean WTF??
Yeah they could have just all take commercial..in disguise. Wouldn't have been bad.
Load More Replies...Right. Celebs need to shut right the f**k up because we are NOT in this together.
Especially since individual humans make up under 20% of environmental damage while corporations and nations make up the rest.
Directly, anyway. Corporate footprints would be very much smaller if individual humans refused to buy their products.
Load More Replies...I lose respect for celebrities, when they lecture on climate change, after seeing videos and photos in 4x4s and private jets.
Or in some cases of a major city. A small country even. Bhutan has a negative carbon footprint. Meanwhile, Bill gates' estimated annual carbon footprint is 7,493 metric tons. Elon Musk has a "relatively small" one with "only 2,084 tons (for reference, the average per person is 7 per year, that includes the ridiculous average of 13.8 tons per year from US citizens and the 8.2 tons per person from China)
When women get shamed for sleeping with a lot of people but men get applauded for it
Idk I find it gross
And somehow sex with different men makes you a s**t but lots of sex with one man doesn't.
Oh this is such a double - double standard and it makes my blood boil. Need coffee.
Load More Replies...To be honest, I never thought highly of men who sleep with a lot of different women and I don’t know many people who do.
But isn’t it common to think they are „fine specimens”, „ boys will be boys”, „ enjoy while you can” and this kind off approach?
Load More Replies...Somehow your vagina is loose if you have sex with 30 men, but tight as a virgin if it’s 300 times with your first and last one and only.
So true! Think about the plot of the Odyssey. He cheats on his wife with nymphs, witches etc., then disguises himself to spy on his wife because he is suspicious that SHE will be cheating on HIM.
I find it admirable when a woman is open and sleeps a lot with different people, when they just don't care what people think. That being said, there's still something weird about it all, especially if the woman is a sex worker or something, then people suddenly think they're wirth less.
Ya know, I think women get just as horny and wound up and in need of some companionship as men.
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Consumers are expected to curb the use of their plastic waste and carbon by corporations and regulatory bodies alike while Nestlé will destroy a natural habitat to make bottled water in plastic bottles and dump the waste into your grandma's urn if its affordable.
guys it's really simple, vote with your pockets. Boycott the offending company, even if it is inconvenient.
The trouble is, what’s “inconvenient” for some is impossible for those who are struggling to afford food at all. Then throw in subsidiaries and/or industries where EVERY company is shitty.
Load More Replies...Corporations love it when people believe "consumer" is a position of power.
It's a shame that big companies basically rule the world now, with less responsibilty
Don’t forget, in America corporations are people too (which is why I think every upper management of PH&E ought to be charged with murder
I find it infuriating the blame and all the responsibility is placed unto the consumer. We're told to reduce waste and reduce plastic but companies don't change their packaging and materials. It's like someone taking your arm and smack you with it, then then punish you for hurting yourself.
My favorite in that regard was BP who asked people to set themselves some goals to reduce their carbon footprint. One guy answered with his goal not to pump millions of gallons of oil into the ocean.
This grotesque behavior is sanctioned by many governments. They won't change until the laws change.
Defending yourself. The fact that someone can punished for defending themselves when no one else would, in my experience worse, is bullsh*t to me. Example a former bullied kid that punched back and got screwed
I don't understand this, especially in bullied and self-defence scenarios.. My principle in life, if someone kicks you, kick back harder.
An eye for an eye makes the world go blind, but I'd wrather be blind than dead.
Load More Replies...Unfortunately it isn't only kids that deal with this. My mom had an abusive bf once that hit her. When she called the police, despite the fact that she was visibly bleeding, she was also arrested as both parties are arrested in domestic violence cases in that county. In my mind this will just cut down on the number of reported dv incidents.
We teach our kids they cannot start a fight but they sure may end it 🙂 (with our full support)
Please give your kids context for that. I've worked with many kids that were told "if someone hits you/messes with you, you hit them back." So then a kid gets pushed into them in the hallway and they punch the kid because "he hit me." And, at least in my book, chasing a kid across a playground to hit them back is not defending yourself, it's revenge. I've had to explain the difference to more than one 6-11 year old.
Load More Replies...This is zero tolerance policies in action. Its a blanket policy to keep whoever is in authority from having to think and actually do part of their job.
This was Catholic school to my son. He fought back against three kids who were bullying him and received the same suspension, because the principal caved to the bullys’ parents, citing “zero tolerance”. We went to the mat for him, to no avail. Taught him a lesson and not a good one.
Load More Replies...Teach your children the difference between bullying and self defense (and when to walk away and when to use self defense).
That's a blurry line. When is it self-defense? If you're hurt first. But if you verbally bully someone until they lose their sh*t and hit you... are you really acting in self-defense to hit back then, when you incited the incident? I've been on the wrong end of that kind of bully. They're particularly fond of physically blocking you from escape, so the only way to get away is to *do* something. My feeling is: If you start it, you better be prepared for someone else to *finish* it.
Load More Replies...School bureaucrats are infamous for this. If only the bullied person would shut the hell up they wouldn't have to lift a finger. After all, they can't reasonably be expected to pay attention to what the kids are doing and stop bullying at all, can they? Plus a lot of bullies are the better-looking, wealthier kids and often are on the sports teams. And of course you wouldn't want to make those darling kids look bad by calling out their crimes, would you?
I hate this double standard. I got punched in the kidneys; I slapped the puncher. I was in trouble. She cried louder, basically. (Note: You can't cry when kidney-punched. You're seeing stars and trying to breathe. Horribly painful.)
In school, a friend was bullied until the last day when he knocked his biggest bullies teeth out with a hockey stick. The teacher smiled and said "About time you grew a pair" before taking the other kid to the first aid room to wait for an ambulance. He never got into trouble for it
Bullies are expert at dealing small, private provocations, whereas a reaction is blatant.
Often the first act is not noticed by a teacher, but the second act is. The one responding to being hit is punished while the initiating aggressor goes free. Consequently I taught my children that revenge is best served cold. Violence, nastiness and aggression are not the answer but they are the reality. If someone has hit you four times and you turned the other cheek each time, or told a teacher and nothing happened to the aggressor, after the fifth time you need to plan a suitable reminder that you will not tolerate their actions.
I have to be exactly on time for an appointment or risk a fine and no appointment. Yet a doctor can make you wait hours sometimes without even a "thank you for waiting" or "sorry about the wait"
I had an appointment with my GP at 8.30 AM. I was her first patient of that day. She showed up at 8.55 without as much as an apology. So I told her that I'd be looking for a new GP who was able to read the clock and knew what respect for their patients meant. I left her office telling her that I wasn't interested in her diagnose, because someone as unprofessional as her could not be trusted. It took me some effort, but I found a GP who does know how to manage his time.
You've lived a sheltered life if you think a 25 minute wait is that bad.
Load More Replies...Had a dentist cancel an appointment on me. No call or notification. I requested the $75 cancelation fee. The receptionist thought I was joking.
That's pretty awesome. Doesn't hurt to ask, I might try this
Load More Replies...Having worked in a GP surgery for 6 years I can assure you that there are often significant reasons for doctors not running on time. Not always the case, but very much often. Examples include; referring a patient to emergency secondary care, having to report safeguarding concerns, patients presenting with more than just one problem, and patients who are in mental health crisis. I've seen patients present at the surgery whilst having a heart attack, severe asthma attack, seizures, sepsis etc rather than hospital, these things have to be dealt with often by more than one GP so it affects the whole surgery with running late to see patients. I've seen aggressive patients verbally threaten and physically attack members of staff, I've had pens thrown at me, I've seen a patient hit a nurse, I've seen patients attack each other in the waiting room, I've seen a patient throw a desktop computer off a desk and smash it on the floor. Honestly, the list goes on...
Sure, but my GP always lets us know, either in person in the waiting room, or via the receptionist, if there's an issue that will make her run late. She's the first of many GPs I've had (I've moved a lot, I've not run through doctors fast :D) that actually does this and she will apologise once it is your turn. We also always get offered the option of rescheduling if she thinks it will run very late.
Load More Replies...I am a retired General Medical Practitioner. (U.K.) I would start at least ten minutes before we were supposed to. There would always be someone ready. So we ran on time or ahead of time all day. Patient satisfaction and less stress for me.
That is the thoughtful, professional thing to do. Wish there were more of you to go around.
Load More Replies...If they run too late, I leave. I will only wait 45 minutes. And I'm not annoyed when I leave, I just make a decision that I've got better things to do. If it's a surgery that has a lot of drs, I'll see if someone else is available
My favourite doctor retired when he was 55. Part of the reason was why he was late to a lot of appointment leading up to his retirement, when he was usually pretty punctual. It later came out his mother had died, and he was taking a few minutes to cry and compose himself before the next patient. He retired because it broke him, but he had a lot of love and well wishes from all of his patient, including me. I bump into him from time to time, and he still remembers me even though it has been about 20 years now
I reallllllly hate this. I told more than one doc I've seen that if they can't show up, why should I?.... "Oh but we're overbooked". WTF are you, a hotel? No, you're a doctor. Technically, I have the same degree (MD). If you're not going to schedule time for patients, don't expect patients to be, well, *patient*!
Where I am, all the doctors I have available to me through my insurance are employed by major medical groups, and it's those groups that control both scheduling and what a typical visit will include. From what I've seen, most assume a doctor's visit will take about 15 to 20 minutes. Mine, for what it's worth, generally run 30 to 45 minutes, not including delays. It could be shorter, but a lot of time is wasted on reviewing paperwork with assistants.
Load More Replies...yep, I do not know why doctors think they can do this. I thought this was just our local incompetence at play, apparently this is a thing.
Happens a lot. I hate waiting at the dentist the most. The noise of those drills .....
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There are a lot of double standards between the genders that need to die, many of which have been touched on in the thread, but I'll share one from quite literally a few days ago.
I'm male and have a pretty good-sized beard. At a social gathering the other day, a woman complimented it but then asked "Do you ever let people stroke it?" I replied that I did not, but then another woman spoke up with "Well why not? Isn't it flattering? Wouldn't you like the attention?" Not at all hostile, just blatantly "Why not?"
To that I replied "How would you feel if someone walked up to you and said 'Oh I love your hair, can I run my fingers through it?'" while miming making a stroking motion.
She recoiled and said "Of course not. That's super creepy." Followed almost a second later by a round-eyed "OH."
Ladies/Gentlemen, if you don't want someone doing it to you, then why would you think it would be okay for you to do it to someone else?
Reminds me of that recent story about the woman groping Gaston's chest. Lot of people were like 'It's just his chest and he's a dude, it's fine!'
I thought Gastons reaction was completely fair, shame on the people who condoned the woman. What if it was a guy trying to touch Cinderellas chest? Bet there would be outrage over that.
Load More Replies...I'm baffled that anyone would WANT to voluntarily non-romantically touch anyone else's hair, where ever it happens to grow.
When my friend worked in a supermarket in his late teens, an older female colleague repeatedly sexually harassed him. She would pat his bum, stroke his arms, and make indecent comments. But, as it was a woman doing these things to a man, no one saw anything wrong with it, and some even thought he was lucky to get female attention. 20 years later, and it still affects him.
I’m mixed and have halfro hair (half Afro, made it up 😝) and white people I never met will literally just start touching it if I’m standing in line or whatever. One lady was like “sorry I just had to, it’s stunning” like WHAT THE F**K that’s ok then Sharon. See how that holds up in court
Yeah, that's utterly disrespectful. WTF is wrong with people??
Load More Replies...Dang, that lightbulb is a slow-starter but glad she finally understood that unwanted touching is unwanted touching.
Had a male friend who told me about a woman at work that was sexually harassing him. Putting her and on his thigh and such. He told me he always thought he would like to be sexually harassed by a woman....until it actually happened. Good guy, but sometimes his views really surprise me.
Had this happen to me in a nightclub in Dublin. Was standing around and I noticed someone feeling my dreadlocks, I turned around and saw this girl with one of them in her hand still. So I reached over and started feeling her hair, and she absolute freaked out.
Dude, some people are just willfully obnoxious. I’m related to a “if I’m having fun, you must be having fun” and “if I don’t think it’s normal then neither can you” person and I find it absurd. I feel for you man. I do. But I think this is just a weird thing that some people do.
Like when Zuckerberg was getting questioned about if he wanted to tell people who he messaged in the last week and what he said to them, or what hotel he stayed in the night before and he looked confused saying basically "no why would I want people to know that private information?" as he was getting questioned about the facebook data leaks... "ohhhh...."
After swim practice when I was 11 my "friends" pushed me out of the shower room and held the door closed when a bunch of older ladies were getting together for water aerobics. One of em was my teacher. They laughed and I just stood there naked pushing on a door. Nobody got in trouble.
If they pushed a girl naked out of the locker room and held the door it'd be on the news.
Yep. Its like men arent supposed to feel embarrassment, fear or sadness. It seems the only things we are "allowed" to feel are happy, horny, or angry.
You can thank the patriarchy and toxic masculinity for that.
Load More Replies...As a girl I can confirm that this has happened to me and it was the most mortifying 5 minutes of my life. However it did not make the news and there was not a huge outcry about it. Actually my teacher told me off for crying and downplayed it when my parents called the school to talk about it later.
OP I feel for you that this happened to your. This is horrifying. You had every right to be protected, and you weren't.
I am saying this as a girl, but sexism works both ways. Same with racism etc.
A group of girls did something similar to this to me in high school, while in the loo, they took my underwear and hid it, and when I got dressed, commando-style, tried lifting up my skirt when I went to report it to the teacher, they got detention.....
How it’s perfectly okay for a potential employer to ask your salary expectations even before an interview, but a candidate asking what the job pays is somehow a red flag for HR and a big no-no.
Like, if all the employer cares about is what I will cost them (before learning anything else about me), then I should be able to f*cking ask too. But no, I’m branded as only caring about money. And you don’t you corporate prick?
Or interviewer being late for the interview, and think 'it's okay'. Interviewer or potential employer, it's a sign that you are okay in wasting other's time and don't respect timeline.
I was once on my way to an interview and my car took a s**t on me, it was done, done. Motor went boom. I called them and re-scheduled for another day, the day of the new interview, I was almost there, about 10 minutes away and they called me and cancelled... They did that s**t on purpose, I was so pissed.. I almost went there anyway to tell them to f**k off but I did not need to go to jail that day.
Load More Replies...Salary ranges should be included on job postings. Let’s not waste either of our time. There’s no point in moving forward with the interview process if the job doesn’t pay what I need.
I'm in the UK so can only speak for my experience here (andmit might not apply to all jobs) but I've never applied for a job where the salary range wasn't stated up front.
Load More Replies...Had an interview with an American firm in the Netherlands. They were constantly talking about what I could do for the business and how involved and loyal I had to be. When I asked what they would be willing to pay me, the interview was terminated.
Well, if it’s any comfort, you probably wouldn’t want to work for a$$holes like that anyway.
Load More Replies...Its like corporations think you're wanting to work for them for some existential fulfillment and not for money to live on." The money? Nah, the money is just bonus. Its the joy and pleasure of spending over a 3rd of my life doing mindless labor for you thats the real reward" /s/
There are several States now (including mine, PA) where asking your current salary is illegal. Asking your “expectations” is them trying to get around that. Make them talk about the job and what it’s worth to them and you decide whether you want to take it or not based on your expectations of the role and compensation. Anything else is bad HR practice.
I always ask about the salary. If it's a good company, they won't mind you asking.
I used to answer, "It depends. If the company is encouraging and good to its staff then I would put a lot of effort into my work and finding ways to improve my environment to increase productivity, so I would expect my pay to reflect my commitment"
That's a whole lot of words for "I'm willing to work my way up to a living wage". And they'll take you up on it. No thanks.
Load More Replies...Usually, you apply partially for a job because you need money, so it seems important to know, before you're in a job that pays badly
Started a new job last year. I asked several times how much benefits cost and they refused to tell me stating it was confidential. I got a 5% raise compared to my old job so good. Benefits cost double compared to my old job so I now make about $150/m less cash in hand. So bad.
If asked what my salary expectations are, I’d respond by saying, “That’s a great question. It would help to know what the salary range for this position is. “Research the position and know what salary you want ahead of time. Be reasonable. If their range is below what you’re wanting (ex. $55K), ask for more, “With my level of experience and skills, I was hoping to earn $65K. Is there any flexibility in your budget?” Or, “I was hoping for $65K, but I’m willing to be flexible based on the entire compensation package.” Sometimes you can negotiate more time off or larger bonuses. If what they offer is within your range, you can reply, “That is about what I was expecting, but finding the right position for me is more important than salary. I’d love to learn more about the job, the company, and the entire benefits package before we talk about numbers.”
Young adult women: old enough to decide that they permanently want to have/raise a child, not old enough to decide whether they want to permanently NOT have children. I lucked into a good doctor that gave me a hysterectomy at 29, but that's an extreme rarity.
Okay I don't think this one is worded correctly. Hysterectomies are NOT done simply for permanent contraception. You need to have an actual medical condition to have one done. The issue is that there are many women who suffer with medical conditions but the Dr refuses the Hysterectomy in case the woman may want kids. Doesn't matter if she is in chronic pain or anything, her future fertility is more important to them. Which should not be the case. Another thing is women are being denied medical contraception like tubal ligation or salpingectomy just in case they change their minds, which is bullshit. It's the woman's choice, if she wants the surgery then give her the damn surgery. It's no one else's right to tell a woman she will regret it or that she has to have kids etc.
I had to fight for my hysterectomy even though I had uterine cancer! My fertility was more important than my life. I found a different doctor and had the surgery, but I shouldn't have had to fight that hard for my life.
Load More Replies...I'm almost 40 and STILL being told that I'll "change my mind", no I absolutely will not. Or how I would "make a great mom", again, no, I know myself better than you, I would be a terrible mother, and now kindly mind your own business.
I knew at 14 I didn’t want children and at 70 that has not changed. Back then it was an actual heresy to say it so I used to fib and say “I couldn’t have any”… eliciting sympathy instead of disapproval. I also found a doctor with an open mind and had my tubes tied at 29. Had I regretted it, that would have been my decision and my mistake, which surely I am allowed to make. When you know you know.
This. I had medical reasons and couldn't get one. "Oh but what if..." the docs said. Hubby got a vasectomy, they didn't bug him.
If a person wants a procedure done that will be good for a person and they are of sound mind, withholding that procedure is unethical. It doesnt matter what you think the person will want in the future doc. Its not you who is affected.
My mom had me when she was 40, and had EXTREMELY painful periods. Yet the doctor refused to remove her uterus. Wtf?
I think it's a liability thing in many, maybe not most, cases. Many doctors are very reluctant to do life-changing elective surgery because they have bad chances in court when a patient changes her or his mind afterwards and sues them.
Load More Replies...I never comment in these but I have to speak to this. I was 24 when I had my daughter, looked like a typical punk rocker. I had a son 2 years prior and was DONE with having children. Contrary to what I looked like I had a respectable job with top of the line health insurance and 0 copay. Every time I went to the ob/ gyn he would ask me the same thing when I brought up getting my tubes tied after giving birth... EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. Same thing- "you're very young, you know that it's not like a vasectomy. It can't be reversed". Me: "I know, but I already have a son and even with 2 respectable incomes I don't think we'll have the time or money to make it work." Dr: "Well then how do you think you'll be able to pay for the surgery ON STATE INSURANCE?" Me: "You seem to have forgotten our last conversation- I have better insurance than you, remember?" Long story longer had to request that particular practitioner (I loved the group, just that 1 Dr. was miserable) never see me again.
I have only seen female ob/gyn and sexism aside I really believe that it makes a difference in your treatment. Had my tubes tied at 28 because of breast cancer. No one dared to suggest something like a IUD just in case I stayed cancer free for a few years and changed my mind and decided that I wanted to tempt fate. Or that I would have a hard enough time finding a husband at my age after my cancer surgery let alone if I couldn't have children either.
Load More Replies...I told my OB/GYN that I had been dealing with terrible gynecologic issues for years, my tubes had been tied and I was not going to have more children. Since it is considered cruel to not have a bitch that isn't going to be bred fixed- I WANTED TO TO BE SPAYED! He said that in 30 years no one had ever put it that way... I mysteriously developed 'fibroid cysts ' so the insurance would cover the surgery and left 1 ovary so I wouldnt go into early menopause & took the rest- IT WAS THE BEST MEDICAL DECISION OF MY LIFE!
While I was still fighting to get my hysterectomy I spoke to my vet about my desire to be spayed like my pets could be. And she said the same thing! But unfortunately she couldn't admit me as a hairless dog and spay me herself. ;P
Load More Replies...I find at times this topic even hard to believe. I understand the doctors position, but at the end of the day why do they even care. Sure a conversations should take place and perhaps a shortish period of time should elapse. But after that do the damn procedure, it's literally your job!
"Entry level jobs" that require experience
That's a red flag for candidates. That company wants someone with experience who would accept entry level pay.
Unfortunately it's a red flag that adorns about 99% of job listings...
Load More Replies...Entry level...I do not think those words mean what you think they mean...
Or the entry-level job that requires a Ph.D. in X subject and wants to pay minimum wage.
I just hired for an entry level white collar job. Her prior experience was two years at Micky D's and some temp work after high school. Showed me she's a hard worker. Now she starts a lifelong career. All because she stuck with a sh*t job and didn't just quit while she made her way to something really solid.
You are a good person and good employer for seeing that in her and giving her the credit for it. So many people don't see what you did.
Load More Replies...As a former business owner, I know the costs of training, which I passed onto my clients. Doesn't matter how much experience someone has if it doesn't jive with my training methods.
I've told this sorry 100 times but...the job that required a bachelor's for part time weinie-mobile driving???
Entry level does not mean the candidate has no experience or knowledge of the job at all?
The person is "entering" the workforce. They have little to no experience, training, and sometimes education. That is the definition of an entry level position.
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Men not being allowed to be feminine without being labeled as gay.
I am gay, and the amount of times friends, family, and coworkers will point at a man being mildly effeminate and whisper "I think he plays for your team" is nauseating. Like, dude, he's literally married to a woman and has kids. Just because he talks in a slightly higher pitch does not mean he wants the D.
Simply taking care of yourself is almost considered gay among some men these days
i gotta say some men have masculinity so fragile they can break it by existing
Load More Replies...How about men not being allowed to support equal opportunity and fair treatment for women without being considered "gay"? I guess real men are toxic, uncaring, despicable assholes.
Bloody hell highschool is a hell hole for this s**t, it's the implying that gay is bad that makes my blood boil, casual homophobia is a bitch
While being married to a woman doesn't say everything (some people find it out later in life), that doesn't mean this stereotype is true. Equality still has a long way to go
Pliny has completed his list of "things that mean you're gay": 1: Being sexually or romantically attracted to the same gender as yourself. Thus concludes Pliny's list of "things that mean you're gay". Check in next time for Pliny's list of "stupid inventions".
Also someone "playing for your team" doesn't necessarily make them a love interest. I'm into men, but I would slap my friends so hard if they would point out every male figure we came across, like wtf.... -I'm a woman- Some of my friends are into men, some into women, some into both, everything and nothing. I'm not going around pointing out every person to them just because they have certain parts or look a certain way or present a certain way, that would be so weird. Oh you're Dutch? I know this 1 Dutch person, you must be a couple because it would be so cute to have 2 Dutchies being a couple in my friend group. F off!
The men in Europe often carry a satchel and nobody thinks twice about it. Personally, I love it. Beats hubby asking me to put his keys, wallet, etc. in my purse.
Load More Replies...to be fair, I know more gay guys who had a family and then came out at a later time than those who dared to be open about their preference right away.. but of course, he is right. My best gay friend finds it super difficult to know if someone he likes is gay or not because you JUST CANNOT SEE IT
My husband used to be what they called "metrosexual." Apparently, caring the least bit for your appearance makes you "gay." Utterly stupid.
To borrow from Matt Haig: people being ok with mental illness until someone shows symptoms of one
I'm not ok with people (and their families, guardians, state) being diagnosed with a serious mental illness and not being treated. For example, Squizofrenia es a very grave malady, even when being called Bipolar Disorder. I have been a witness of individuals creating mayhem, and afterward, calmy saying, "Oh, I have bipolar disorder." The supreme court ruling that found "free of involuntary institutionalization" sufferers of mental illnesses does not make them healed. Also, nobody indeed wants to pay for treatment, so many are ending in the streets are wrongly called homeless, drug addicts, prostitutes, petty criminals, and jails and prisons main population. Mental illnesses should be covered by Medicaid, long-term, and free of charge due to their impact on society. Individual action, other than personally financing the full treatment of a sufferer, always will fall short. Good intentions and acceptance are mostly self-gratification.
I won't argue that mental illness is overlooked, and somtimes stems from physical illness (long-term malnutrition plays he** on the brain, for example), but it's spelled *schizophrenia*, and it is nothing like bipolar, nor is someone causing chaos a sign of mental illness. You have to be properly screened by professionals, not self-diagnose, and they're saying it doesn't mean they get away with it. FYI, they are in fact often homeless, and addiction is known to be at least partly physical if not wholly so (depends on the substance), so they *are* ill, don't dismiss that, please. Thank you.
Load More Replies...Totally. I've gone from having 20+ friends to having zero, and they stopped getting in touch after I had to be hospitalised for my illness. I was totally up front with them about what had happened and thought that I could rely on them for a bit of support where necessary (I'm not asking them to be my carer!) just as friends. They obviously thought differently. I tried phoning or texting them and they just ghosted me. It's a shame because I thought we were a pretty close bunch. Clearly not.
Your mental illness is not your fault but it is your responsibility.
Amen!! I have a sister who treats people like s**t and throws tantrums and my mother makes excuses for her. They live together. I have the same problem, and as much as I am affected I am always aware of when I may go off on a family member. I know what I said and always apologize when I get back on track. Nobody who is being treated, as both of us are, has the right to behave badly and use their illness as a excuse.
Load More Replies...Yeah it’s like all sympathy and understanding until you start showing the symptoms of a bipolar episode and suddenly you’re an inconsiderate asshole who isn’t trying hard enough and taking advantage of people’s kindness. Makes you wanna name them in your suicide note.
All medical health care, including mental health and dental health should be universally available to anyone and everyone because health care is a human right. If your country cares for you it would care for your health.
The quality of your health care should not be dependent on how much money you make, and should certainly not be tied to your employment situation.
Load More Replies...I’m honest about it: I have anxiety, I can and have supported people in my inner circle, but I can’t take care of every stranger who has a mental illness and I don’t take kindly to dysfunctional behaviour like lashing out.
People show symptoms by thinking theyre "Fine Now" and dont need medication for it anymore or think they can do it on their own. Everyone else has to deal with it. If youre on medication for mental illness, your ON medication till the day you die or they miraculously cure you
Taking your medication, then believing you're good so you stop taking them is a common part of mental illnesses such as schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. It is unfortunately a common cycle. I cannot take lithium because I have psoriasis. The 2 don't mix. It breaks my heart I can't because I had never been so good in my entire life. But now I have to take a cocktail of medication twice a day. I will never stop taking them but I will say the odd slight temptation has been there sometimes. I ask myself sometimes "Who am I? Is the person I really am the one without the medication? Or is the person on the medication the real me?" This is more complex than you think.
Load More Replies...I have the rare experience of both sides. It was all mental illness until my 1cm aneurysm that had leaking and causing all the symptoms popped. Amazing how quick the *mental illness* disappeared afterwards. I sacked my Dr the moment I could hold my mobile up in icu 10 hours after surgery
That is a rare experience in both instances. I sure don't know everything, but never heard of a leaking aneurysm doing that. Although I can certainly see that, depending on what area of the brain is being pressured by the accumulation of blood. My God, you are beyond lucky, fortunate, blessed and any other of those kinds of words having not died simply from the leak. To have an aneurysm pop even during a clipping is such a life threatening disaster. I am so happy you made it. And you're so right. Let's look at EVERYTHING to make proper diagnosis. I hope you're having a good life.
Load More Replies...Let’s write a book about that one. Been there multiple times. And there’s about a couple different people: -The over-empathic but non-understanding: They get kinda offended after some time, as they are as hurt as you, but can’t help or change it. So all they do is have pity on you all day while feeling bad themselves. -the disbeliever: they just don’t get it and most likely never will unless they ever encounter something similar, but even then it’s a once in a lifetime phenomenon, only happening to them. -the understanding don’t-getter: They can kinda understand what it might be like, but then again they just don’t get how you can’t change it. Must be easy right? -the as-long-as-I-deny-it’s-not-real They outright deny it exists, since even a speck of insight would tarnish their perfect world beyond salvation. And they would do almost anything to prevent that. Must be nice living in a bubble. And lastly: -the sick one... Those are people who share our burden and get it.
I could write an entire book on this very subject. Liberals are liberal right up until they aren't.
As a male I cannot take my son to a playground without getting a few strange looks. It's annoying.
where's that? I see dads with Kids an all playgrounds. In fact I go to playgrounds with my kid, myself, no strange looks
I see dad's with their kids at the playground all the time. However, I get lots of looks sometimes because I'm a white male, but my wife is Mexican, so people I assume are looking at me like I'm not the father and wonder if I'm a creep or something.... it's 2021, mixed races exist, get over it.
Load More Replies...Depends on your location. In my country, you see men from all backgrounds and ethnicities take their children to playgrounds. But then, we don't frown upon fathers who parent. We even give them paternity leave.
Never ever, ever saw anyone give me a strange look for taking my son to a playground.
This and every other situation where men are seen as predators when we've done nothing more than exist in the same space and time as women and children.
I think that will eventually start to get better as more guys these days are finally getting the long overdue info about toxic masculinity, and realising and/or standing up to it. There's hope for our future generations. Women's shouldn't have to be so afraid, and men shouldn't have to suffer judgement because of the actions of the few. I see this from a woman's perspective, but I'm also raising a son and I want a better world for him too. Even if I didn't have a son I would still feel that way. I remember my dad taking me out to tea as a treat when I was younger, then we went shopping and came home. We had gotten funny looks at the restaurant, and in the shop and I was at sea as to why: dad said they seem to be assuming we are a couple. My head exploded. Why? Just because I'm a teenager so look 'of age', laughing and joking with my dad, and ppls minds go straight to my dad is a pervert. And again, as a woman, I have been harassed, ogled, catcalled, followed and then some...
Load More Replies...Of my friends who got divorced, most of the dads got primary or sole custody. The number of times I've seen someone approach one of their kids and ask if they need to call the police or threaten to call the police is ridiculous. After a particularly heartbreaking story on the local news, one of my friends was told the PTA passed a resolution prohibiting fathers from taking turns in the morning/afternoon carpool pickup/drop off. It is so sad that a few horrible men made it difficult to try and be a good father.
it's not those few horrible me, it's patriarchy combined with witchhunt mentality.
Load More Replies...Maybe it's different in the UK, but I've never experienced this. However, I do feel like an outsider (as the only Dad) when I take my kids out on weekdays - particularly in toddler groups. It's no fault of the Mums (who have always been friendly), it's just being aware that I am the minority.
i think this one depends on your country. In a patriarchal society like usa where they also have a huge witchhunt going over pdf files, like they used to have over communists in the mccarthy era or satanists in the 1980s, the default assumption is a man's role is not to look after his kids . If you add that assumption to man in playground with kids, the assumption is he is a pdf file. In our country there's no such assumption.
Star student athletes are nearly untouchable. If they make the school look good the school will almost never take action against them.
Brock Turner. What a disgusting little maggot. He should still be behind bars.
You mean the räpist Brock Turner. We don't say his name without his legacy.
Load More Replies...Also star students that can graduate high school and college and still can't read!
That doesn't actually happen as much as the movies make it seem.
Load More Replies...This times a thousand. They aren't flunked in class, they aren't arrested, they aren't penalized... And they don't even have to be stars, just on the team, sometimes. Ugh.
I will never understand why some professions are multi millions a year. I appreciate that they have a talent etc, but I'd rather treat scientists, researchers etc like this. A football game, concert, or movwhile. isn't going to further humanity as a whole.
*Do not read the above comment out loud near a mirror.
Load More Replies...Instead of three months shouldn't have been AT LEAST three years?
He should have had his peen chopped off and surgically attached to his forehead - so there's no mistaking what a vile, piece-of-s**t, dickhead, rapist he is. And the same treatment for the judge too.
Load More Replies...On the other hand, in tv shows there's the stereotype that football players are stupid
Real life counter example: Congressman Colin Allred, who played in the NFL so he could afford to attend law school and live out his dream of becoming a civil rights attorney.
Load More Replies...Instead of schools focusing on academics, they focus on their money-makers.
This literally happened to me. The kid was an athlete, so the fact there was evidence was swept under the rug. To quote the principle "we don't want to ruin his future on your claims. He could lose his chances at scholarships"... the guy s3xually assaulted me the next week in the school camera's blind zones. They've still done nothing 4 years later.
Basic laws not applying to people with money or power. I thought the US was based on an idea that nobody was above the law.
Or the right lawyers. There's nothing so straight that a lawyer can't bend it.
Load More Replies...Only in our dreams. Being rich means you get away with everything in this country.
Alex Murdaugh... Currently. Prominent, wealthy man in South Carolina. Too many crimes to count at this point.
Load More Replies...The US is based on capitalism more often than democracy. Or, at least, the economic importance will always come before the judicial and social.
The origin of the word "privilege" literally means private law. We make laws to protect those with money and power. Its why 5g of crack is a mandatory 5 year sentence but it takes 500 g of powdered cocaine for the same sentence. Poor people use $20 crack and rich people use $200 a gram powdered cocaine.
The US was based on the idea that property-owning white men made and enforced the law to their own benefit.
The Rule of Law is a beautiful idea. The Golden Rule often supersedes it (those with gold make the rule).
Our judicial system is very adversarial and does not care about the truth....just what can be proven, and what can be proven comes with a price tag. Mark Twain has been quoted as saying "Court is where two people go to find out who has paid more for their lawyer." It will always matter as it stands now, that if you are wealthy, you will most likely not go to jail or serve a lot of hard time. If you are poor, and even innocent of the crime, you still are at a disadvantage and may do time nonetheless. Many times the first act of a public defender is to try to get you to plea bargain.....even if the evidence against you is weak, just to save time and the court's' money.
Or you're part of the govt that makes the laws so you can write them so you get around them, but the rest of us can't.
Finland, ironically, has a better system in place in at least one type of fine. Speeding fines are based on your income level, meaning that wealth is NOT a get-out-of-trouble-free card.
I really think thats the way to go, and not just speeding fines. A lot of minor offenses should have the fine based on income. The next step would be to direct the fines that are payed to the budget of any department other than the police or the court system.
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Struggled with social interactions growing up. Half of my life was people telling me not to take things so personally. The other half was being told to conduct myself a certain way so I don't upset people.
YES!!! This! OMG - I'm 42, struggle with working a 'normal' job, and I've never heard it put so clearly. Thank you!!!!
I feel this and completely agree - at 56 I just wear the mask at work so I don't upset anyone by getting visibly upset.
Load More Replies...Abused as a kid, so I never knew what to do, since at home anything could be disaster. THIS. "Don't take it personally, don;t ;upset others". Umm.... I breathed? I asked if you wanted supper yet? you end up *very* confused.
Same - I completely understand. You're not alone!
Load More Replies...Go sit on santa's lap (sinterklaas, basically the same), no I don't want to. Oh go on, sit on his lap. No thank you. Don't be a spoil sport, go sit on his lap, you're supposed to. He's not even santa, he's -insert name of our neighbour from down the street- and I don't want to sit on his lap. Cue "santa" pushing and ridiculing me for 10 minutes while my parents were in the kitchen fixing drinks, and eventually threatening to not give my younger siblings any presents is I wouldn't sit on his lap and sing him a song. Gee I wonder why I grew up as a shy introvert
I always tell my daughter and I was raised that it's okay to express your emotions. Her grandparents on her dad's sad have actually told her not cry in public because "it makes others feel uncomfortable."
I deal with something similar at work.... I push constantly to do what the right thing is, but get zero support from HR and upper management for doing what I'm asked to do. When I show my frustration I get told "don't get so upset" or "don't let it bother you, just do your job" Well ok, I am doing by job but by not supporting me in doing what you ask, I look like a total jerk to the employees....
I'm finally being evaluated for autism this month. I'm a daughter/sister/wife/mother and turn 50 next month. If the eval points to a YES it'll be a huge relief for me and would explain SO MUCH...
Still don't have social interactions down for similar reasons. People thought I was overreacting to their non-stop microaggressions.
In regards to the NFL, a head coach was fired because of racist and homophobic emails. He ABSOLUTELY deserves to be fired, absolutely. However Desean Jackson openly said Hitler was right about Jews, Antonio Brown has multiple assault allegations against him, Richard Sherman has an assault case against him, Tyreek Hill has audio of him threatening his child and GF with violence, as well as beat the brakes off his college GF, and SO MUCH MORE. These men are still in the league.
The double standard that I am sick of is that in the NFL for some reason words are treated way more harshly than actual physical violence.
I love football and am a die hard fan, but I truly dislike the double standard in the league today.
The NFL and NBA are full of straight up punk a$$ thugs that can literally get away with murder and nothing happens to them!
It's almost like they're rich men playing in a wealthy man's league. Being rich or being able to make others rich excuses everything. See politicians openly committing crimes above.
Load More Replies...THIS times a thousand upvotes. Shooting? Drugs? Rape? All acceptable behavior in pro sports. I love my sports, but I hate the double standard.
As I stated earlier, I haven't watched a game since they treated Kap like some thug.
This a new development that probably wouldn't have happened 10 years ago or even maybe two years ago. Fortunately for those players they did their disgusting things before this dynamic changed. Perhaps they wouldn't be so lucky today. The Sherman one is new, but the details aren't as bad as the charges make it seem.
It's too bad that they were treated as untouchables as soon as they showed talent. Even as early as Pop Warner, they're treated as "special". I love football, but the things that high level players get away with are sickening. Just this weekend, an NFL player was in a drunk driving accident, killed a young woman and her dog and had a loaded gun in his car. Then there's Aaron Rodgers...Sigh.
these players are like this because they've never been told "no". Any athletic ability and they are golden.
Some people I know who are strongly against gender norms told me that I shouldn’t have a say in my wedding since I’m a man…and that my fiancé alone makes the decisions.
It was pretty freakin confusing.
Just don't invite the jerk that said you don't have a say, and you'll do fine. I'll bet it will be a gorgeous event. (And please have the the little burros going around with six-packs in their saddle bags. Saw that somewhere on BP and thought it was too dang cute.)
Load More Replies...Bridzillas ignoring the fiancé instead of having fun and planning together. Shame.
You'd t hink their goal was just to get married, not to marry a particular person.
Load More Replies...We had my mothers wedding. Everything we chose was wrong. Things that we were told we would regret if we didn't have are the very things that we regretted having! My husband had studied a beautiful piece of music that he wanted to have played when he got married but we weren't able to use it because we HAD to have the wedding march! As we left the reception we looked at each other and said " we could have achieved the same thing at the courthouse!". Both of our kids had the wedding that they wanted. We only gave advice when asked.
I've seen so much of this. Went through it myself. We broke up thank God, but the experience with my parents doing this made me decide if I ever did get married, I'm eloping.
Load More Replies...F*ck it, it's both your weddings! Pirates! Laser Obama! Electro-Diesel Locomotives! Do whatever!
That is ancient from back when the bride's parents paid for everything except your and your groomsmen's tuxes. It's the 21st century. The couple get to plan it together. Bride and groom or groom and groom or bride and bride. I'll just throw this in. Even if the only attire you can afford are PJ'S at the courthouse, try to pay for it yourself. The minute the parents start to chip in a significant $, you just both may have lost control of the whole thing. There are parents out there who will now take control of whatever they're helping pay for because it's their money, therefore their say. Been there. Done that.
My missus and me planned our wedding together as equals (that was 22 years ago so not exactly a modern notion). There’s no way I’d have married a bridezilla type although some friends definitely did and they’re pretty much all divorced. Take from that what you will 🙂
The bridezilla was probably unwilling to share and let go of imperfection. That can carry over into the relationship.
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When company’s say they are family friendly but don’t want you to work from home or help with child care.
At me current workplace we're not allowed to work more than 50% from home, because working from home is a luxury they say, even though it's perfectly possible in this line of work. It almost seems like they want us to come to the office so they can keep better track of what we're doing and control us more easily
'Luxury' or not, what does it matter if all the work is being done? I hate companies like that.
Load More Replies...When companies have absolute proof that their entire workforce can and will work and increase productivity while working from home during the lockdown, but then demand that workers return to the office for “a sense of team” or “to help us work more cohesively, as a team” even though the “team” outperformed itself in the last year and a half by (a fully and officially documented amount of) 350%.
Family friendly = "we're a family company. You're in our family now. You're devoting your time to us now."
As well as definition of "family". I called my employer out when I was told I could not have the shift off to go pick my still very weak after being very sick mom up from the hospital and get her well settled in at home. She can take a taxi home and settle herself in at home. I was a nurse working in a hospital for God's sake! So I turned the tables and pointed out how nurses who have kids don't get hassled for having to stay off to look after a sick child. Today, my mother is my child. They had no come back for that.These days, with people having to help care for elderly parents, that's an issue too.
Or the family friendly company will happily send a parent overseas for work continually. The company my husband worked for when our kids were preteens expected him to go the other side of the world for a six month stint. When my husband told them he'd only go if our whole family could they were confused, even more so when he chose to fly economy instead of business class so he could be with us on the plane.
It should be the opposite. An employer-employee relationship is a business. Not saying they can't be friendly but some companies take advantage of that term.
That want you under their thumbs, even if they make more money with happy employees
Fortunately, this is slowly changing. The pandemic helped move this along.
Corporations can take advantage of employees, but employees can’t take advantage of corporations.
There are however corporations who take care of their employees and thankfully there are laws that protect workers here in Europe and in the modern western world (maybe not usa but I don't really know - before I get downvoted to hell).
Yeah the USA has weak protections,. Here in Canada we have vacation and paid maternity leave and other protections.
Load More Replies...mmm..... I mean, it is possible if you know how their game works.
This expresses a fundamental, and fundamentally dangerous, misconception regarding the nature and function of corporations.
We're getting our revenge now by not putting up with it anymore.
My principal taking days to read and reply to my emails, if ever, VS me being told at 8 in the morning that I should have known something because he sent me an email at 10 in the evening the night before.
THIS. I've emailed my counsellors and teachers multiple times and still had to wait over a week for a response. But yeah, I'm the irresponsible one because I didn't see the response you sent at 11pm.
I would upvote seventy two trillion times if I could. This is very annoying.
Load More Replies...Add a closing line that you expect a reply no later than time/date of your choice.
I had an argument with a previous employer, we agreed on certain workdays and hours and before working for them I specified that I had another job and wouldn't guarantee answering my phone outside of work hours. Also in my country you're not even supposed to answer work calls or emails outside of work hours. They called me at all sorts of hours of the day and night and when I told them I quit they had the balls to blame me for not getting back to them within 5 minutes (at 4 in the ffing morning)
My job may not be 100% the best but at least pre-covid the policy was "we understand if you have to bring your kid in because (s)he is sick and we get that you won't be as productive that day as long as, as a general rule, you perform your best."
Did my performance review a month before due (using a new confusing online form). My boss sends it back to me two months later on the weekend wanting me to change where I put my accomplishments (not changing the accomplishments, mind you). I get an automated email screaming that my part of the performance evaluation is a month late and I need to fix it RIGHT NOW. Sigh.
Our daughters 1 yr course extended to 2 years because the teachers took so long in getting back to her. She'd been told that she wasn't allowed to go onto the next stage until she'd heard from the teachers.
We believe that, if it happens three times, we are justified in relentless emails until an answer is given in my house. My program director thought he was exempt from his own rule regarding responding within a reasonable timeframe. He never let my emails go unanswered again for the duration of the program. We just have to retrain them to be considerate humans again. That’s all
Arrived just before 9 am, logged in grabbed the materials I needed for a 9 am meeting, then trotted off. Got back to my desk, found a scathing email from my boss reprimanding me for not being present at an earlier meeting (8 am). I found the meeting invitation was sent late the night before. I sent the boss a screenshot with the "sent" time circled, adding, "You know I do not arrive until 9 am. If this meeting was that important, why didn't you call me last night to let me know I needed to be here for 8?" -- No response for that dolt except a nice black mark on my next annual review.
Covid restrictions applying to regular people but not celebrities or politicians
🙄 I work on film sets and everyone must wear a mask but no one enforces the rules for the cast or Director, producer etc when we’re not shooting.
in my country, they exempt themselves from some restrictions or break them unpunished. police now may enter your house without warrant if they suspect a party going on inside. groceries and pharmacys are allowed to stop unvaxed people form entering. some churches and kitchens for the poor did.
It applies to everyone. The famous get headlines because it sells clicks. On Thursday my state had the most new COVID deaths since Jan 6 and yesterday we had almost 3x as many new COVID cases as last Halloween. Those people aren't politicians and celebrities.
What? That's BS. It's knuckleheaded celebs and pols who don't wear masks. If they are at a news conference or making a speech and there is enough distance then they don't need to wear a mask while speaking otherwise they are just weights dragging us down.
Apparently, politicians are allowed to disrespect the citizens of the country they serve but it's frowned upon to tell a politician to "go f*ck yourself" to their face.
Respect is respect. No matter if it wears a suit or what language it uses
Your "debates" are people yelling over each other to either get internet points or calling their opponent liar. I have to see the first debate where a person is allowed to state his points while the rest sits down, listens and responds in a civil way like a decent human being.
Load More Replies...(cheesy russian accent) In America, they have freedom of speech. You can walk up to the White House and say "Down With Ronald Reagan!" and nobody will bat an eye. In the Soviet Union, we also have freedom of speech. You can walk up to the Kremlin and say "Down With Ronald Reagan!" and nobody will bat an eye.
Perhaps in a totalitarian government, but I don't know of any "democratic" government where this is a problem.
Apparently those asshat politicians missed the memo that THEY work for US, WE Don't work for them. And Apparently those that voted those politicians into office missed them memo to. So, to all you politicians and politician supporters, GO F* Yourself
the former head of my country said that unvaccinated people were barmy. even before there was a vaccine, the politicians were talking despicably about people questioning them and their decisions. and that has not stopped. but people stopped asking questions and holding them accountable e.g. when it became clear that some of them made money, big money with the situation.
When jobs say they like to develop and promote internally then hire externally and wonder why you arent happy.
My mum is exceptional at her job and is one of the highest rated workers in her agency. She has been doing APS5 work for a while now even though her position is an APS4. She has to sit for an interview to get the APS5 position. The problem is my mum doesn't cope well with the interview process (recently diagnosed with ASD). She has had 3 interviews and been denied the higher level and instead they have hired outsiders that don't have the experience. My mum has had enough, she has told them to no longer give her APS5 work. If she's not going to get paid for doing the more complicated stuff, then they can shove it. Her boss and bosses boss have vouched for her but because she works for the government there are specific guidelines they have to follow in regards to the hiring process. She can't just get a promotion without being successful in the interview. It really isn't fair at all.
I have come across this so often, always in government/local government/health service jobs. The converse is also true - the lazy ones who do minimal work but know all the right people and perform well at interview keep getting promoted, and noone in authority will listen to a word said against them.
Load More Replies...Or hold interviews externally, get through the whole interview process with a candidate, then told the candidate they decided to promote someone internally. Happened to me. No apologies for my wasted time or inconvenince. Then they called me back in 6 months to offer me the same position, because "the internal promotion" didn't go that well :))))
Related, when new hires for the job come in at a higher salary than the experienced workers already there -- and those experienced workers being denied raises to at least catch up. Leads to the best, most experienced people leaving the country. Business leaders make so many short-sighted, stupid decisions and always blame "the economy" for their companies going downhill, when it is at least 98% their own lazy worthless stupid decisions. And then of course the same leaders who ruined the company walk away with golden parachutes.
That thing happened to me at work. Applied for a middle management offer, was told that I wasn't experienced enough with company culture and know hows. Then that guy coming from nowhere got the job, and is doing mistakes after mistakes since....
Why are you still around to notice those mistakes? It ain't get better, time to look around for a place where they appreciate your knowledge and skills.
Load More Replies...Is it wrong if I took care of that by being the one person the external hire trusted and gave said person bad advise?
My job will cancel your shift at any time but put it towards your reliability if you cancel a shift, yourself.
It's perfectly acceptable for women to wear short skirts and no sleeves on the workfloor if a man does it it's seen as a big no no. If's it's 34degrees outside plz don't make me wear long sleeves and pants i'm melting away.
The opposite was true when I was in school. South Africa we have uniforms. Girls had to wear short dresses throughout winter with either stockings or knee high socks. 50% of my school memories were of me being freezing cold. Not sure if girls have more options nowadays.
At my school in Cape Town, the girls in my year campaigned for pants successfully in 2006. Cold no more!
Load More Replies...Might be true for this poster's workplace, but the opposite is more often true. Men can wear comfortable clothing, but women get judged harshly for how they dress. Can't be too sexy, too informal, everything they wear is heavily critically examined where for men who cares what they're wearing? And it's doubly bad in school -- where you can tell the school staff is composed of creeps who have a very over-sexualized view of their female students, and are very arbitrary and at the same time strict as to dress standards for girls -- and couldn't care less what the boys dress like at all.
I enjoyed wearing a uniform in school. that said, there's no reason that uniforms or dress codes at school or work shouldn't be reasonable and take weather into consideration
I don't know if I agree with this one. My work is business casual, and skirts are expected to be below the knee and sleeveless blouses are questionable (typically women will throw a cardigan or suit jacket on top). I've never seen a workplace outside of TV where women could wear "short skirts and no sleeves" and be considered dressed professionally.
women wearing short shorts, making fun of men wearing short shorts...fashion crime my ass
Men have some things which can (and do) pop out of short shorts that women don't have. I remember telling my brother his balls fell out of his house shorts on more than one occasion.
Load More Replies...I think they meant celsius but that's what i thought first too!
Load More Replies...Umm how about we get arrested if we take our shirt off even though the breast being a sexual body part is man-inspired. It’s for food first, ladies and gentlemen. Stop flattering yourself and think it’s all for your sexual gratification you disgusting pricks. Men can show nipples, women go to jail. But why not blur the whole boob on tv? Isn’t the breast tissue the inappropriate area seeing as we show man nipples all the time? Gooooooo inequality! Yay 😁
Yes, there are other issues out there, but this one is still valid. Working in an office, I (as a man) have never been allowed to wear shorts, no matter the weather. Whereas women have been allowed to wear shorts or skirts.
Load More Replies...If they are doing the same job, they should have the same uniform standards.
Men being able to go topless but women can’t.
I always felt awkward when men don't wear upper body clothing. Sometimes you just don't want to see that
I once saw a photo of a dad with his baby who by accident latched on to the dad's nipple, and it was all hoots and giggles but I thought if a woman were to show this with her breast out we'd be yelling shame and shameful. Why?
I’m happy with people going shirtless if they want. I think that those who do (without having gone to the gym for months beforehand) show body confidence I wish I possessed when I was younger. I do feel that many who do so in order to display a gym honed body seem to do so for reasons of vanity rather than comfort. Hey - each to their own. Life’s way too short to care about such trivial things.
I saw an interesting test of that whole concept at a Tig Nataro comedy show. She's young and had breast cancer and had a double mastectomy. She has chosen not to have breast reconstruction. Therefore, no breasts, no nothing on her chest except the scars. She was talking about something like this and proceeded to take her shirt off and place it on the chair. Talk about feel the audience squirm right through the TV. Why? Because she's a woman and took her shirt off in public.
i still don't understand that decision. Note that it's the legal decision, not the moral question that i don't like. As i understand it, they said it should be legal because female breasts are not sexual. There's a billion dollar industry well represented across Canada that depends on the fact that women's breasts are sexual. Also, and this of course is just my experience, but 100% of the women and very few of the men i've, er, investigated this with, have found touching of their breasts to be sexually arousing, to the point where they frequently do it themselves. So what's the proof for the opposite case? LIke genuine question, i don't get it.
Load More Replies...It used to be no problem in Western European countries. With more diverse cultures immigrating, it has become unacceptable by certain minority groups so women aren't as comfortable anymore sitting topless on the beach. Women even said they don't do it anymore because they were sure they would get assaulted.
Until fully clothed women can walk comfortably and safely in this world I don't see masses of women partaking in public toplessness. Everyone should be able to of course, ideally.
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I’m a teacher and called my wife smoking hot at a football game. My principal reprimanded me for it. I told the principal my wife calls me her smoking hot hubby to her class sometimes. She said it’s different because it’s perceived different when a girl says it.
Gotta say it's a little peculiar to be calling your spouse smoking hot in general in front of your class (like I can't imagine a scenario that would call for you sharing that information) but why would it be different for a man than for a woman is beyond me
Read the room. There's a time and a place for this type of banter, and school games should be off limit.
Where in the submission was any of the people's religious beliefs mentioned?
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Popular employees getting away scot-free with things that would get anyone else fired.
isn't this applicable to basically anything aswell, like popular person not having the same rules as your average person?
Not just popular. If you bill well, you can do anything you want. Value to the company is often directly correlated to the amount of BS you can pull.
Omg yes, dealt with this crap at one of my retail jobs. Wouldn't be surprised if the boss and my co-worker were actually getting it on.
My manager at work not paying for her drinks but not allowing staff to even get staff discount for theirs
It's time to speak with the superior of the manager. A well written letter explaining the situation will do the trick.
And next you get a written warning that you are creating a toxic work environment and please refrain from such activities since it is not your duty to monitor the manager.
Load More Replies...This seems specific to your workplace, does this happen often? We always got free drinks (barista)
“I’m broke” f*ck you get a job!
“I’m 22 million in debt but it’s ok”
The hell?
If you owe the bank $100, that’s your problem. If you owe the bank $100 million, that’s the bank’s problem.
They used to say that being rich is the capacity to borrow money. So the more you can borrow, the richer you are being perceived.
If you steal a loaf of bread because you're hungry, you'll get 15 years in prison. If you change some numbers on a computer and steal $50 million you'll get a probational 12 hours community service and are forced to pay back $15 million.
Load More Replies...Who said anything about college? Trump can stiff banks and contractors for millions and walk away with his mansions but if you don't have enough for your electric bill you're a lazy bum.
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The tinder attitude of "impress me," and "I have standards," "Be funny," "Don't be boring."
meanwhile person is boring
If someone is looking for you to entertain them, that's not a date, its a 3 year old birthday party. Grown-ups can climb a 14K ft mountain on Saturday with their best friend and then sit next to them on the couch all day Sunday and never speak and be equally happy both days. Grown ups have relationships that make both of you better instead of at the cost of one party.
In my experience, 3 yr olds are excellent at entertaining themselves. They're just super destructive, so a wise adult gives them a safe place to wreak havok.
Load More Replies...Also : being a trashy man/woman expecting a prince/princesse SO. Common' , fit your life standards !
Yesssss this. The other one is him :" you didn't lol in our date". Me : you only told be boring stories and make yourself looking like a God on earth.
matched someone on bumble (FYI - here you can match a heterosexual partner but the woman has to send the first message, if he does not reply within 24 hrs the match is cancelled), gave my standard "hi" (because most men are not online 24/7 and don't see my message or just don't bother, so why invest more) and was greeted with a "how disappointing".. dude really thought the app was created to lift men on a throne and the females have to bow to him and he can make his pick.. nah, I will give you the same greeting I would if I saw you in a bar, especially when your profile is blank. If there is a bio and something catches my eye of course I'll refer to it, but hey, showing interest goes both ways.
people on tinder is like a store, where everybody expose themselves willingly like items on a shelf. and get frustrated when they get treated as such...some people are like avocados, everybody that comes by have to have a feel and they get squishy and soft, then nobody wants them. others get push on shelf way back and nobody ever notice them. usually it doesn't matter who you really are, you just have to play the game and pretend you are the mr/ms right...tbh it's all screw up
oh god I'm guilty of the pls be funny phrase - I had some weird dates with people who claimed to be the most exciting person ever and then they proceeded to small talk about the weather - I'm a really funny person if I may say so myself and I like to talk to entertaining people
What is missing in the list: men/people who will never be able to become pregnant, deciding if a woman can have an abortion if she wants to
I, to my eternal shame, used to be in the camp thanks to my Catholic upbringing that abortion was wrong full stop. Then I learned about rape and incest. Even then I though "other than those two horrific things big whoop, she gets a bit "fat" and has some backpain, that's no excuse to terminate, every mother went through that and they survived" .... then I learned what the ACTUAL impacts can be on a pregnant woman's body after reading the story of a young mother whos TEETH FELL OUT (every single one of them!!) and who is constantly made fun of because of this, because it turns out (duh) that the developing foetus gets the calcium it needs for its bones from the mother's own calcium supply ... in her case it was the jaw bones and the teeth themselves. And that shocked me enough that I actually did some proper research. Now I'm 100% in the camp of "it's her body, her choice". Not to mention the immorality behind a complete stranger dictating what you can and cannot do with your own body.
Load More Replies...Men wearing a kilt and (usually) women thinking it is perfectly acceptable to lift it, try and look under it, put a hand up it and grab your 'equipment' and then say "It's only a bit of fun"
Nothing about domestic violence/abuse in general? Huge double standard there.
No there isn't. A lot of places now have 0 tolerance laws and it doesn't matter what gender you are. The double standard is starting to thin out as people are realizing it's just as wrong for a girl to smack a guy around. Unfortunately men still feel shame, and are shamed by others, for coming forward. That's a societal problem but not necessarily a double standard where it's socially acceptable to the point we just accept it as it is the way it is.
Load More Replies...Another double standard: Men are "allowed" to have gray hair, they're still attractive and desirable. Women need to dye their hair, otherwise they have supposedly given up and are no longer seen as attractive
This is more of a personal preference and a fear of aging. I'm not sure if it's an attractiveness thing or something else. My mom dyes her hair and continues until it's all white. She doesn't like the salt and pepper look. There are women who do dye their hair gray, and it's become a trend, and this is among 20 year olds. Some women just aren't ready to see themselves aging because it is scary. It's a reminder you're not immortal and one day you'll be old and one day you'll die. That is a very scary thing to think about it.
Load More Replies...if you say youre black and proud thats great but if you say youre white and proud youre a racist lol
People saying that they are white and proud usually are racists. Black people have been told for ages that they basically amount to nothing, so to them it is defying the people who have been putting them all that time. White supremacists use "White and proud" as another attempt to insult POC. So sad that you aren't able to understand that.
Load More Replies...If there's one thing about people I don't get, it's double standards. What is it I need to think?
Didn't have time to comment on everything. But I did have time to UPVote everything. Hope this helps.
The idea that ALL white people are racist purely because they are white - and for no other reason - and that it isn't even POSSIBLE for anyone who isn't white TO be a racist. This, in of itself, is a racist opinion to have. I have personally seen a lot of quite open and blatant racist comments directed towards white people by non-white people and nobody ever calls them out on it and if you try you're immediately branded a racist instead and they are defended to the hilt. Also this strange idea that white people cannot possibly understand what a slave went through because only black people were slaves, yet those same people claiming this have no idea that the very word "slave" itself comes from the slang for "Slavic" since at the time people from Slavic nations (who were most definitely white) were the most numerable slaves within the slave trade worldwide. The truth is almost every nation on earth has not only owned slaves at some point in time - every nation has had their citizens BE slaves too.
A guy I work with dashing out of the office 2 hours early for his kids baseball game, which was okay - and then the owner wants to start a detailed discussion with me, 5 minutes before I need to leave to catch my bus. (It took 3 buses and a trolley for the hour & 45 minute commute home). It happened repeatedly, even though I told him REPEATEDLY I had a bus to catch. I finally just told him he'd have to send me an email, which I would read when I got home. I never felt like my time was respected.
What is missing in the list: men/people who will never be able to become pregnant, deciding if a woman can have an abortion if she wants to
I, to my eternal shame, used to be in the camp thanks to my Catholic upbringing that abortion was wrong full stop. Then I learned about rape and incest. Even then I though "other than those two horrific things big whoop, she gets a bit "fat" and has some backpain, that's no excuse to terminate, every mother went through that and they survived" .... then I learned what the ACTUAL impacts can be on a pregnant woman's body after reading the story of a young mother whos TEETH FELL OUT (every single one of them!!) and who is constantly made fun of because of this, because it turns out (duh) that the developing foetus gets the calcium it needs for its bones from the mother's own calcium supply ... in her case it was the jaw bones and the teeth themselves. And that shocked me enough that I actually did some proper research. Now I'm 100% in the camp of "it's her body, her choice". Not to mention the immorality behind a complete stranger dictating what you can and cannot do with your own body.
Load More Replies...Men wearing a kilt and (usually) women thinking it is perfectly acceptable to lift it, try and look under it, put a hand up it and grab your 'equipment' and then say "It's only a bit of fun"
Nothing about domestic violence/abuse in general? Huge double standard there.
No there isn't. A lot of places now have 0 tolerance laws and it doesn't matter what gender you are. The double standard is starting to thin out as people are realizing it's just as wrong for a girl to smack a guy around. Unfortunately men still feel shame, and are shamed by others, for coming forward. That's a societal problem but not necessarily a double standard where it's socially acceptable to the point we just accept it as it is the way it is.
Load More Replies...Another double standard: Men are "allowed" to have gray hair, they're still attractive and desirable. Women need to dye their hair, otherwise they have supposedly given up and are no longer seen as attractive
This is more of a personal preference and a fear of aging. I'm not sure if it's an attractiveness thing or something else. My mom dyes her hair and continues until it's all white. She doesn't like the salt and pepper look. There are women who do dye their hair gray, and it's become a trend, and this is among 20 year olds. Some women just aren't ready to see themselves aging because it is scary. It's a reminder you're not immortal and one day you'll be old and one day you'll die. That is a very scary thing to think about it.
Load More Replies...if you say youre black and proud thats great but if you say youre white and proud youre a racist lol
People saying that they are white and proud usually are racists. Black people have been told for ages that they basically amount to nothing, so to them it is defying the people who have been putting them all that time. White supremacists use "White and proud" as another attempt to insult POC. So sad that you aren't able to understand that.
Load More Replies...If there's one thing about people I don't get, it's double standards. What is it I need to think?
Didn't have time to comment on everything. But I did have time to UPVote everything. Hope this helps.
The idea that ALL white people are racist purely because they are white - and for no other reason - and that it isn't even POSSIBLE for anyone who isn't white TO be a racist. This, in of itself, is a racist opinion to have. I have personally seen a lot of quite open and blatant racist comments directed towards white people by non-white people and nobody ever calls them out on it and if you try you're immediately branded a racist instead and they are defended to the hilt. Also this strange idea that white people cannot possibly understand what a slave went through because only black people were slaves, yet those same people claiming this have no idea that the very word "slave" itself comes from the slang for "Slavic" since at the time people from Slavic nations (who were most definitely white) were the most numerable slaves within the slave trade worldwide. The truth is almost every nation on earth has not only owned slaves at some point in time - every nation has had their citizens BE slaves too.
A guy I work with dashing out of the office 2 hours early for his kids baseball game, which was okay - and then the owner wants to start a detailed discussion with me, 5 minutes before I need to leave to catch my bus. (It took 3 buses and a trolley for the hour & 45 minute commute home). It happened repeatedly, even though I told him REPEATEDLY I had a bus to catch. I finally just told him he'd have to send me an email, which I would read when I got home. I never felt like my time was respected.
