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“Our Friendship Was Only Worth 25 Dollars”: 35 People Who Cut Ties With Their Friends
Interview
Our friends have a far bigger impact on our lives than many might think. A massive 85-year Harvard study found that positive relationships keep people happier, healthier, and help them live longer. So there are very practical benefits to maintaining deep, strong bonds with an active social circle. However, real friends are quite rare. And in some cases, it can be quite hard to determine who’s only pretending to be your BFF.
We’ve collected some of the most dramatic stories from these two r/AskReddit threads here and here showcasing what finally made people’s friendships fall apart. Scroll down to read about some of the signs of fake pals, and it might help you evaluate your own relationships.
One of the authors of the captivating discussions, redditor u/fusillihair, was kind enough to answer our questions. Check out Bored Panda's interview with them about the most important qualities for a friend to have, as well as what to avoid, below!
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
I was in a group of friends who started bullying a person I knew out of nowhere. I told them I was not okay with that. They soon started hanging out without inviting me. I am still very glad I did what I did.
Kiki C 2 years ago
I had a friend start hating me for telling people not to bully her…not kidding. Some people that were her “friends” were being jerks to her and I told them to leave her alone. She got mad. I told her that she shouldn’t be friends with people who physically and emotionally bullied me and she got mad. Second one happened with more than one person.
baby frog 2 years ago
op did the right thing. friends are absolute assshits. bullying is never okay, and i myself will never tolerate it. this is coming from someone who’s been from bullied to abused. i stood up for myself and i’ll do the same for others. don’t let people get that power over you pandas, it’s hard to get out from. love you guys 🩷 stay safe
Ashley Harrold 2 years ago
As someone who's been bullied before, they are never going to forget that. Thank you.
LastButNotLeast 2 years ago
I've always been very selective when it comes to friendships because I know my friendship is worth a lot. I was friends for a long time with a boy. a boy I didn't know joins our group, but my friend does. this person had had a very difficult childhood, but he was an extremely cultured, intelligent and good-as-nails person. my friend took advantage of him being so nice and exploited it by bragging about it. I tolerated this behavior a couple of times, the third time, I confronted him in front of the party when the other guy wasn't there and I never went back. Some say I'm a difficult woman, but I will never turn my head away from injustice.
I’mSoEmotional 2 years ago
Sounds like you embarrassed them of their bullying and having you around reminded them of that. Kudos for you!!!
RELATED:
#2
I was living with my best friend. Her boyfriend told me he wanted to show me what he bought her for Christmas and that he wanted my opinion. So he trapped me in the bathroom then attempted to shove his tongue down my throat.
I knee'd him in the balls. Told him I was going to tell her. Then I left to go see my boyfriend. I told my best friend later that night what happened. She believed her boyfriend over me.
End of friendship. Many years later, she tries to friend me on Facebook. Are you f*****g kidding me?! Get bent b***h!
Sapna Sarfare 2 years ago
If you don't believe a good friend, then you do not deserve them at any point of later... i dont understand why they think things would be okay after realisation
I’mSoEmotional 2 years ago
It’s amazing to me how many women will believe their husband/boyfriend over a best female friend. They find out that their man is a scumbag eventually, because if he did it once he’ll do it again. Good men value their women.
Josh Gilland 2 years ago
Who wants to bet the Facebook reach out was to say she caught him cheating?
PlatinumThe8-BitCat 2 years ago
Does “shove his tongue down my throat” mean kiss them? I’m pretty sure what that means but now I’m imagining something that I did not want to imagine
Jane Cortez 2 years ago
Many years ago a friends fiancé was cheating on her, my husband saw them making out in a restaurant he was in. I told her. She believed him. Years later a friends boyfriend was coming on to me in their kitchen. She came in as I was saying I was not interested. Of course they stayed together.
michele mbennett101044@yahoo.c 2 years ago
What a douchebag moved, she deserves him if she’s that stupid and desperate. Good for you dumping both of them!
ROSESARERED 2 years ago
I had a friend accuse me 9f having an affair with her husband...he was in Afghanistan with the army at the time. I told her if she believed I would do thst ( I never woulld) she didn't know me, or her husband as well as she think. Takes two to Tango. You can't accuse one person of having an affair. She never spoke to me again. Not even if I was in the same room. They would visit my parents and she wouldn't get out of the car.He husband caught up with me 5 years layer and asked why we are no longer friends. I answered if she hasn't had the guts to tell you, I wasn't going to be the one to...I wasn't going to damaged their marriage....they are still happily married, but have never heard from her since
Kim Shannon 2 years ago
I would have accepted the friend request just to see what she has to say. You don't have to be close with her again, but an apology would be nice
#3
I got sober.
Richard Michael 2 years ago
Been there, done that. My whole circle of friends changed... for the better. It wasn't fun watching everyone get too drunk to stand up and ramble on like a high school teen.
Der Kommissar 2 years ago
Friends who used to drink with you now don't want to hang out because you're sober. Good riddance.
Nichole Harris 2 years ago
OMG yes! My hubby and I got clean 5 years ago... Up till then we'd had an active social life.... Friends coming over the works we got clean and now we've got 2 friends that we see like 2x per year each 😂 it's much quieter now
Josh Gilland 2 years ago
Yep it tells you who your friends are compared to who your using buddies are
According to Reddit user u/fusillihair, what made them create their discussion about friendships going awry on the r/AskReddit online community were real-life examples.
"I was inspired to ask the question after seeing a relative's long-term 'friendship' break down. It made me curious about other people's experiences," the OP shared with us that they sought common ground with others, online.
What someone looks for in a great friend can vary a bit from person to person. We were curious what redditor u/fusillihair prioritizes in their own friendships.
"The things I value the most in a friendship is honesty," they highlighted the importance of openness and transparency.
#4
I lost 100 pounds. She didn't, and "accused" me of deliberately changing. Well, yeah...
Misha Writer 2 years ago
Had two friends. One was overweight and had gastric bypass surgery. The other was not overweight, and as the first one lost excess weight and became healthier, the second said "I like fat Lisa* better" and ghosted both of us. We were both like ...WTF? But whatever. Her loss, but what really boggles is that she wasn't happy for her friend making healthy changes and reducing some pretty massive health risks by being over weight. *not her real name
Brazen 2 years ago
Jealousy is an ugly thing. I had a once friend/co-worker who was the same way.
Load More Replies... Richard Michael 2 years ago
I'm at 85 lbs that I've lost, Congrats on your success. Sounds like you cut out a little more dead weight than 100 lbs, lol.
SuperChicken 2 years ago
I'm sure losing that 100 lbs and that jealous friend, is a big weight off your shoulders (yes, I'm showing myself out).
Brazen 2 years ago
I once had a co-worker drop off anywhere between 5 and 10 chocolate bars a day when I told her I was on a diet and trying to lose weight. I just gave them to another co-worker with children. The one with kids asked me why I just didn't say something, and my answer was "if she wants to waste her money trying to sabotage me, who am I to stop her?" Still makes me laugh to think about how obvious she was.
Sparkle 2 years ago
Been there. This is the green-eyed monster, and a true friend would be supportive no matter what, rather than doing that "you make me look bad" routine. That's my biggest pet peeve - someone having the audacity to tell me that *I* made *them* look bad. No, haha, you did that to yourself.
Astrophile 2 years ago
Lol I remember a friend like this in high school. In grade 12, after I’d lost some weight and was starting to look/act more adult and had gotten my first car and had a job, told me “you’ve really changed since grade 8” when I couldn’t hang out one evening because I HAD WORK. I laughed and said “I damn hope I’ve changed at least a little, I was 13 in grade 8 and I’m 18 now!”
#5
After trying for a child for years and years I got pregnant with twins, one of them was in my right fallopian tube and I had to have an abortion to save my life.
Called her to tell her what happened and she informed me that she regretted supporting me through infertility if I was just going to kill the first baby I got pregnant with and that getting the abortion proved to her I never really wanted kids and she couldn't be friends with someone who would kill their child without any questions asked.
I hung up and we haven't spoken for 12 years. I missed her for the first year but not anymore, I just feel bad for her daughters knowing she will do the same thing to them if they are ever faced with that choice, I have heard from mutuals she bad talks me every chance she can and says it was my choice to throw away our friendship over my pregnancy knowing her views on abortion.
Irina Khruleva 2 years ago
This woman is s**t crazy and also stupid who doesn't know basic anatomy. Good riddance.
baby frog 2 years ago
homegirl really thought she’d survive a baby in her fallopian tube. she’s really let someone like OP die, which will most likely end the child dead too. *sigh* very sad, but happy ops ok and that she atleast got one kid :)
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VioletHunter 2 years ago
That woman needs a tome of medical science explaining fallopian tube pregnancies broken over her head.
Billy Harrelson 2 years ago
This is why they need to stop lumping all these medical procedures under the term "abortion". My wife had to have a DNC the first time we tried for a baby because her egg failed to implant in her uterine wall. A successful pregnancy followed soon after. Later, when applying for assistance the interviewer asks if she'd ever had an abortion and she said no but when my wife told her about the DNC they're like "so you have had an abortion?" and my wife was ready to punch her. They don't want to use terms like miscarriage anymore. Lump it all under abortion.
Jill Rhodry 2 years ago
A D&C is an abortion - whether it's medically necessary or used electively the procedure is an abortion - it's politics and moral judgements that's inflamed the name for a simple, and often needed, medical procedure.
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Jon Steensen 2 years ago (edited)
Even if it had been a regular abortions, your "friend's" opinion in the matter should have been a very low priority in the matter. As she won't be the one who has to deal with all the "symptoms" of the pregnancy, and she won't be the one who is putting in the effort to raise the child, her discomft with an abortiong will be way lower than the cost you will have to pay to please her. She sounds way too selfcentered to be able to put things into the right perspective if she thinks that her opinion is the most important thing in this regard. Some people just seem too keen on playing "the saviour of the innocent" to realise what it is that is actually happening and what the real world is like.
Amelia Jade 2 years ago
I can't relpy to Kiki C. But just wanted to say that if that is how you feel, you're not the good person you think you are.
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Joe Reaves 2 years ago
And not only that but the embryo had no chance of developing to viability. It's not like it was a choice of I live or my 'baby' lives. It was a choice of the 'baby' dies or we both die. She would basically be committing suidide by refusing the proceedure.
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Maria B 2 years ago
I am an old woman. I have seen many many instances where terminating a pregnancy is the best thing for a wild variety of reasons and I am fanatically pro- choice. YOU did not HAVE a choice. Had your tube burst then you would have bled to death. This was NOT a viable pregnancy.
Steph 2 years ago
Wait. She calls your choice for an interruption of a fellopian tube pregnancy to save your life an abortion? Or did you have an abortion BEFORE? Either way, it shouldn’t matter! It is your decision and as a true friend, she should respect or at leas accept that, even if she disagrees. I‘m sure you had your reasons and choices like that are always hard to make! I wish you the best! 💕
Scotira 2 years ago
As Jill and Delta said. Any natural or purpously interrupted pregnancy is an abortion, that's the MEDICAL term! And the reason the handling of abortions in the US ist criminal in my opinion. They rather let the mother die, it boggles my mind!
Load More Replies... #6
She let her bf sexually assault me while I was heavily intoxicated, while she pretended to be asleep. She 'wanted to see what he would do', I was basically bait.
Niki A 2 years ago
I really appreciate whenever I see someone post this comment. I feel like it shows support.
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Ericka Barrett 2 years ago
I’m sorry you were sexually assaulted.. I hope you find comfort in counseling and healing from this trauma. Please don’t blame yourself but report both of them creeps..
michele mbennett101044@yahoo.c 2 years ago
Report both for sexual assault. She’s the worst of the two! This amounts the first stage of human trafficking.
"Friends should be able to trust what their friends are saying—without trust, there can be no friendship," the redditor explained just how fundamentally essential trust is between real friends.
"Friends being honest shows they value their relationship with you," they pointed out that this sort of mutual respect shows a proper investment in the relationship.
Meanwhile, Bored Panda wanted to get redditor u/fusillihair's take on some of the signs that someone may not have one's best interests at heart and that it might be time to rethink the 'friendship.'
"The biggest red flag I’ve noticed in friendships is when someone constantly takes advantage of you," the OP shared with us.
"It’s because they’re not scared of losing you and you become a means to an end."
#7
When I stopped people pleasing and set boundries.
Ima Manimal 2 years ago (edited)
Pay very close attention to when someone starts having problems with your boundaries. That is the precise point where their respect for you ends.
tw 72 2 years ago
Two of my favorites: 1) Givers need to learn to set boundaries because takers don't have any. and 2) The only people who will be upset with you setting boundaries are those who benefited from you not having any.
Load More Replies... Jane Cortez 2 years ago
Never, ever put some one else first! No one cares! You teach people how to treat you. As Maya Angelou said, ‘when people show you who they are, believe them.’ I reference this wisdom a lot and if helps me keep things in perspective. People will try to ‘negotiate no’ for every reason under the sun, some out of blindness because they are so immersed in their struggle but nonetheless, boundaries are healthy, safe and necessary!
baby frog 2 years ago
i tried to tell my parents i despise being touched and my mom said “i created you, i’ll do what i want.” no, you won’t. i tell you not to touch me don’t f****n touch me, end of story. my dad was like, “but interacting with family is important!” yeah, and two things 1) you can without touching me 2) i have full right to set boundaries, abandoner. drives me insane how people think they can control me
#8
I came out as bisexual and she accused me of having a crush on her (i didn’t) but she said i made her feel uncomfortable.
SuperChicken 2 years ago
Wow, narcissistic and homophobic. Good riddance to your former friend.
- 2 years ago
"If one of them ever came near me-" "Don't worry, they wouldn't be interested in you."
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Steph 2 years ago
I‘m sorry for you! She must be a very insecure person then! I (f, hetero) have a lot of homosexual and a very few bisexual friends. Never been uncomfortable around any of them. I‘d feel much more uncomfortable having a guy hitting on me, once I‘d made it clear I‘m not interested…
CheshirePhrogg 2 years ago
I flirt with a couple of my gay buddies. We've talked about it I know they aren't interested they know I'm not interested it is just a fun game and keeps everyone's flirting game on point for when we find someone we are interested in
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Rob(erta) Roy 2 years ago
I came out as bisexual to one of my really good friends, she asked if I had a crush on her, I said that yes, for like 5 seconds, I had a crush on her. She broke out into a huge grin and shouted, "yes!" She just thought it was great and she's super supportive
baby frog 2 years ago
i like how your friend reacted. she wasn’t even upset and was supportive! i need some more friends like that irl
Load More Replies... Jiji The Cat 2 years ago
so sorry to hear that :( I'm lesbian and luckily all my friends have been supportive so far, but I know that there's going to be a few homophobes out there.
Dustin Miller 2 years ago
Hey that happened to me too, only my friend thought I was trying to turn her, closeted homosexual, boyfriend; after I told her I don't find him attractive in anyway, she called me a liar and ghosted me. Her boyfriend left her 3 months later for his coworker after coming out on his birthday. He's a good guy, we've actually became friends after he came out.
primrose pyro 2 years ago
the moment i saw the pride flags, I started to get sad :( [to confirm, I'm not being homophobic at all because I myself am lesbian, but sad because I knew it was going to be something revolving around homophobia]
Maria B 2 years ago
Why do same gender friends assume that you will suddenly start to try and make passes at you when you have never ever done so before? I would have told them " I never was physically attracted to you and now I am no longer attracted to your personality, thanks, this has been enlightening."
Emma Goransdottir 2 years ago
Glad you got rid of her! She sounds full of herself 😣!! Not a true friend ♥️
Shadow 2 years ago
Why!!!???? The hell does homophobic AH's automatically think every gay, lesbian, queer person is automatically out to date THEM? When they are the last people on earth anyone would want to be with?? Seriously, no one wants a hater, a judgemental AH, straight or not! Such a BS excuse for unreasonable fear.
#9
He tried to sleep with my wife. Knew him for 30+ yrs when he tried to sleep with my wife.
Steph 2 years ago
That’s the worse you can do to a friend! Even if you knew each other for „just“ one year. It’s the absolute NO-Go to make advances to a friend‘s significant other. I‘ve stopped trusting friends just knowing they would do their moves one Someone I had a crush on. And I find it doesn’t even matter if you are a teenager. NO !
Kiss Army 2 years ago (edited)
One of my very best friends knew I had been in love with a guy for all of our high school years and beyond. When he came back for a visit from college he came to the restaurant my friend and I worked at to see me but it was my night off so when he saw her he stopped her to ask her about me and find out how to get in contact with me. She was just about to get off work and invited him for a drink and said she would call me to come and meet them... she never called me and one thing lead to another and she slept with him. He was just a one-night-stand to her but it broke my heart. I forgave her and a few years later I met and became engaged to the love of my life. The first time she met him, she pulled me aside and told me what a nice a*s he had. That was it for me... I dropped the friendship - she should never have been thinking about him like that!
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Brainmas 2 years ago
One of my husband's friends hit on me, grabbed my a*s with both hands while I was standing there talking to him. They had been friends since high school and he had a pregnant wife, scumbag. I removed his hands and told my husband. I don't think they've talked since. They definitely weren't friends after that.
Carla Campbell 2 years ago
My ex-best friend slept with my ex-husband. It doesn't matter that we were divorced. You just don't do that.
Johnny Storm 2 years ago (edited)
Bro code mate.. Bro code. The one and only code. Never touch your bro woman...
Real friendships, at their very core, are about mutual respect, trust, and empathy. One-sided relationships based on exploitation and manipulation won’t last and can’t really be considered ‘friendships’ in the first place. But the reality is that sometimes folks simply can’t tell whether what they’ve got is the real deal or just a facade until it’s too late.
Fake friends who are in the relationship purely for their benefit will always take more than they give and won’t give a damn about your boundaries. They don’t understand the importance of reciprocity and will milk you for favors and money and emotional support. But when you ask them for the same things, they’ll always find a convenient excuse about how they’re incredibly sorry but they simply can’t help you. And how they’ll totally make it up to you next time… only to come up with another excuse then.
#10
She found Jesus, then lost her mind. In that order.
Mycroft1967 2 years ago
Wife's ex found Jesus, lost all his reason, sent preachers all their money, then remarried a crazy woman. In that order.
deanna woods 2 years ago
If finding religion makes you go crazy, then you are finding religion for the wrong reasons. Knowing Jesus shouldn't turn you into a douchebag.
CHRIS DOMRES 2 years ago
I think everyone has a story to tell about someone who gets into religion, becomes a fanatic, and from that point on the only people those fanatics associate with are other cult members. One that I knew went from being a major jerk on the sinning side to being a major jerk on the righteous side. I guess a jerk is a jerk no matter what their beliefs are.
Steph 2 years ago
Uh, that happens a lot, it seems! And it doesn’t matter what church…. it‘s just radical fanatism! Seems these people were not sane before finding faith, either!
Weasel Wise 2 years ago
I had a friend that we'd grown up together. When we became adults, I told him I was atheist when he asked me why I haven't been going to church. He hasn't spoken to me since. Very Christ-like behavior! 👍🏾
Weasel Wise 2 years ago
Read Dr. Dean Hammers's book 'The God Gene'. It's really dry and you'll get flashbacks to grade school biology class but it's very informative and explains why and how "faith" happens to some and not to others.
#11
I had 3 friends from high school, met up with them again in our late 20s. One was doing well financially, married a well off dude and had 3 kids. She looked down her nose at the rest of us, would insult us, constantly talk about how much money she had and would start arguments in the group chat.
She even told me that the way I dress, I will never get a husband. When I started dating my now fiancé, he'd get sh*tty with me for continuing to talk to her because she'd make me cry. She told me that because I had no kids and wasn't married, I was immature. I tried to explain to her how her behaviour affected me/the group, but she never changed. I cut her off a few times, but the other girls would guilt me back in.
One day, I was just over it. I blocked all three of them and iced them out. They tried contacting my mother, my partner, calling me from different numbers but I blanked them. The main bitch even messaged me and said "You're dead to me!"
Guess what, c*nt, you were already dead to me.
Deb Dedon 2 years ago
Some people only feel good about themselves when they can 'look down' on someone else. You filled that need for your former 'friends'. Without you to prop themselves up, they're lost. Could be they'll start preying on each other.
Ericka Barrett 2 years ago
Wow I was exhausted reading this post. It made me sad to know you endured so much stress from that relationship. Good luck with that situation. I’m hope the door stay closed
Garth 2 years ago
I had a friend that was financially well off and would lord it over others and would look down on the rest of us working class. We ignored it and found out years later he was in hock fer plenty and had a failed marriage and business and was lying to us. I heard he is divorced, working a dead end job still while the rest of us are retired, happy.
#12
When I realized the friendship was toxic. Whenever I would hang out with her, I would feel drained. I became her therapist.
Steph 2 years ago
Sounds like she was a leech. Or you are a sponge, soaking up all the negativeness of others (which makes you a therapist or a garbage bin - however you look at it). You must be a very compassionate person to have attracted such an emotional parasite! Stay that way, but learn how to protect yourself!
kansasmagic 2 years ago
This is a tricky one for me. I have depression, and have had it for years. Everything you read will advise "talking to a trusted friend," but in my experience the people I thought of as friends don't really want to know about it. I guess that's how you figure out who can be "trusted"? I didn't want or expect "therapy" - that's a specific skill, and few people are adequately trained - just support and understanding, and maybe the occasional "how are you doing?" But I also believe strongly that we should not (have to) dump all our stuff onto one person (whether friend or s.o.). Some people need more support than that - and our friend/s.o. could use a break!
Edurne 2 years ago
I've had the same experience, former friend would just talk for hours about her problems (not serious, things like I'm 30 I don't have a boyfriend I have to get married asap... or the guy I met online won't answer my 20 calls) AND get upset with me if I didn't have time to hang out with her. I'm so glad I cut that bridge!
Tobias Reaper 2 years ago
had similar experience was friends with someone for over 20 years but didn't realise at the time how toxic and narcissistic he was when i met my current best friend and she was nice and treated me nice it made me realise i didn't like who i was when i was with my ex friend and i felt excited to see my new bestie but felt like it was such a chore hang out with the ex friend he moved away to somewhere else and i used this as an opportunity to break off contact i havent spoken to him in a few years i dont hate him or wish anything bad for him i am a different person now and have no room in my life for toxic people
Not only that but fake friends are also often incorrigible gossips. A rule of thumb is that if someone’s spilling the tea about all of their social connections to you, they’re very likely to be blabbing all about you to their other buddies. Of course, gossip is a natural part of being a human being. But there are limits.
If someone asks you to keep a secret but you end up telling someone else, you’re effectively damaging your friendship. Everyone slips up from time to time, but it’s the bigger picture that matters here. Someone who isn’t able to keep private things private probably doesn’t deserve your trust in the future and likely doesn’t respect you enough. And you can’t have a genuine friendship without a firm foundation of trust and respect.
#13
Ah, it was very simple. He was a MAGA supporter and we often talked politics and such. But that wasn't the cause for ending our friendship. I'm quite tolerant and I know how to separate people from their political beliefs. But come the pandemic, he starts promoting anti-vaccine stuff in his facebook. I lost both my in-laws to COVID and he knew that. I tried to convince him to get vaccinated out of concern for him, appealing to reason and empathy. He called me a shill for the pharmaceutical companies, a murderer and a co-conspirator for genocide.
So, that was the tipping point. I blocked him from all my social networks without any explanation. He can go get lost for all that I care nowadays.
Alex Kennedy 2 years ago
“I was fine with my fried being full of hate so long as it only affected people I didn’t know. But when they did something that affected my in-laws, that was a step too far!”
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Big Chungus 2 years ago
What is wild to me is that I knew some anti-vaccine people as well during covid times, I understand the hesitation but I still did my part and got vaccinated, well since covid is more or less here to stay like the flu, they seemed to have bored and started promoting anti-vaccine for every vaccine including polio lol like wtf
Hey! 2 years ago
My father got polio when he was really young (4-5). He couldn't walk. He was brought to the local YMCA to swim with his dog for therapy. He started walking again with a slightly crooked ankle - he couldn't dance. Having the polio vaccine was an absolute must for all of us children when he got married.
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deanna woods 2 years ago
I know a few people that never got the vaccine. They said they didn't trust it.
JK 2 years ago
So OP ended a friendship because OP badgered (rightly or wrongly) a friend to have a medical procedure that the friend wasn't comfortable with, who chose to reject it due to their own thoughts/beliefs, whilst in no way complaining to OP about OP getting vaccinated. So, in short, what OP should have said is "my friend wouldn't listen to me and do what I told them to do with their own life/body, even though friend didn't judge me or insist I live my life any other way than I want, and so I didn't like them anymore". As for the MAGA comment, that was unnecessary, had no bearing on the story/reason, just an excuse to belittle and make people judge the friend as stupid/bad person.
Julie Schulz 2 years ago
Actually, the OP says the friend called him a pharmaceutical shill, a murdered and a genocide co-conspirator (last sentence of first paragraph). No exactly non-judgmental on the friend's part.
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adam james 2 years ago
Get your clot shot! Help big pharma make more money off an untested and unproven vaccine that does nothing!
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Rachel Smith 2 years ago
A shill for the pharma companies?? The vaccine was free up until this year
#14
She promised me that she would pay me back if I bought the tickets for a girls trip that she was desperate to go on. We had everything planned. I did all the work of looking and researching because that’s enjoyable to me and she hates it. She has 3 kids and they’re all smaller than mine - so I told her that I didn’t mind the planning as long as when it was done we would just go and enjoy ourselves since it had been 2 years since COVID. I bought the tickets and wanted to use my new Amex plat for the hotel bonus points. Keep in mind she makes more money than me - 250K per year and her husband makes $150K. So money was not the issue. Multiple times we discussed the trip, her going on the trip, and that our husbands would hang out with the kids together while we were gone for 5 days over a long weekend + Monday & Tuesday. When it was time to pay me back she went dark. Refused to answer my texts. Ghosted me for weeks. Mind you, I’ve known her for 4+ years and she was always kinda flakey when it came to texting. So her flakiness was not entirely new- but this is not the way you treat people period. I finally sent a Venmo request for the portion of the trip that was hers along with the message “please pay me back for your portion of the trip since you will not respond to text messages or calls.” She then proceeded to gaslight me and tried to tell me via text that she never agreed to go and that I was just misremembering (KIM, our husbands had a weekend planned out with the kids for when we were going to be away, so obviously, I wasn’t “making this up”.) After that I sent her a farewell and f**k you message and didn’t look back. I took my other best friend on the trip instead. She couldn’t pay me for half - but she paid for the meals and taxis instead. It was super nice and I’m glad this c**t is out of my life.
Rostit . 2 years ago
its weird seeing people say "after covid" ... Covid is still running strong. Hospitals nearby are filling up like crazy currently. Covid is not over. Whoever thinks this is wrong... get your shot and or wear your mask.
Gabriela 2 years ago
My sister did the same to me haha. Invited me to a trip to Europe and when all was planned [by her, according to her preferences] she said "she wasn't in the mood for traveling". I traveled solo for 3 weeks, met some friends I'd never meet with had I gone with her, had a blast. Best 3 weeks in my life. Forgave her because she's always been a b***h anyway
I’mSoEmotional 2 years ago
I’m old and I finally realized that if you pay for something or “loan” someone money be prepared to never see it again and be happy about it. Then if you get it back it’s a pleasant surprise.
Celtic Pirate Queen 2 years ago
My sister had a (self created) drama & I agreed to go help her out. She started drinking by 7:00am for the 3 days I was there. I paid for everything, my plane ticket, all our meals & Uber rides. She agreed to pay me back the $1050 when she got a check from the lady she was housesitting for. In the meantime she was absolutely nasty. Just a mean f*cking b*tch from hell. I ended up going home 2 days early. I quit responding to her calls & texts. It took 2 years but she did finally pay me back & apparently assumed that was the reason I had ghosted her and everything was fine now. No, I ghosted you because you are toxic AF & I don't want anything to do with you. It's been over a year since I told her to stop contacting me. I have no regrets whatsoever. "When someone shows you who they are, believe them".
Channo Sagara 2 years ago (edited)
Idk... OP seem to don't mind using the term "best friend" very loosely. It's like Brad Pitt claiming he speak "the best Italian" in Inglorious Basterds. Also what's the allegedly not paying friend get from not paying?? She's supposed to be "desperate" for this trip, if i were her, I'd lie my way to get a free vacation, say i have money trouble or whatever, until i got back from the vacation, THEN I'd go dark. Sounds to me OP is the one who pushes this vacation on her friend, her friend don't actually want it, therefore she goes dark so she doesn't have to go. Oh and i also agree with the other commenter who say covid is still among us. I don't get the mentality of people who treat diseases like they're fads.
#15
Me: Rocker chick outcast with purple hair and chain jewelry. Her: Popular, beautiful, perfect soccer star jock with a new Jeep Wrangler. We sat next to each other in geometry in 10th grade. We started with giggling together at a fellow classmate teasing our odd teacher. I lived far from campus. So one day, I meekly asked her for a ride home in said Jeep in exchange for the day’s homework answers. We are almost 40 now. She moved to a new city. We became—and stayed—best friends. Real Fox and the Hound situation. I visited her at least annually in her new city. She has a guest room she called “IAlreadyOrderedPizzas’s room.” We’d stay up all night laying in it and talking. She got into a bad relationship. Not sure if it was that, or her untreated depression, or her slow descent into alcoholism, or a combination. But I quickly became her punching bag when she was having a bad day. Everything from “I was always better than you” to “Well at least I’m not stuck in our home city.” I recently had to cut her off. It is still the hardest and most painful thing I have ever done. Yesterday was her birthday. Happy birthday. I miss you and I love you.
Steph 2 years ago (edited)
Makes me cry! I‘d love to have you as my friend! Hope you two will find back together! You seem to have a strong bond, still! True Love and friendship can overcome a lot! You two could be the perfect example to prove that! 🙏🏻❤️
Maisey Myles 2 years ago
It wasn't you but her alcohol abuse. If and when she gets sober, one of the 12 steps is making amends with the people you crapped on. If and when that happens, I hope you will take that call
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J.A.I. 2 years ago
I know...I teared up a little when The Fox and The Hound was referenced 🥺
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JammaCoast2Coast 2 years ago (edited)
My best friend from high school married my high school sweetheart. I missed her much more than him. He was manipulative and toxic - It's been a long time so I would like to give him the benefit of the doubt; maybe he's now a better person, but I don't care enough to find out. Anyway, I missed her for years until I realized what I missed was the person I knew, not the person she became. After that, the pain started to subside and I hardly think of them anymore.
Candace Emswiler 2 years ago
I’m sorry and it’s not you. You are a great friend. Keep going forward-maybe she’ll see the light and come back. But maybe not…it’s happened to me.
I’mSoEmotional 2 years ago
Exactly. Addiction changes people but dependence does not. There’s a difference between the two.
Load More Replies... Beachbum 2 years ago
That’s sad. Sounds like she befriended you when most didn’t and you abandoned her in her time of need. You don’t have to take abuse, point it out, tell her you understand, tell her if it makes her feel better to use you as a punching bag so be it, but abandoning her is on you.
Wysteria_Rose 2 years ago
You can cut something/someone out of your life that is damaging and still miss it/them. That is natural and okay.
The same goes for promises. We all probably have at least one person somewhere in our social circle who constantly overpromises and underdelivers. Someone who’s constantly offering to help or to meet up, only to cancel the plans at the last possible minute, isn’t someone who can be trusted. Good friends offer us stability and stay true to their word. Poor friends only care about their own pleasure and don’t give a damn about others’ time and feelings.
Finally, an absolutely wonderful way to know for a fact whether someone values your friendship is to see how they behave when life serves a bunch of ups and downs to you at high speed. A great friend will weather any storm by your side, shoulder to shoulder, and will celebrate your successes.
#16
She was toxic and abusive to me for years but I made excuses every time. The last straw was when she was incredibly cruel to one of my other best friends who was actively dying of cancer and then painted herself as the injured party. I put up with being treated like s**t for 20 years, but to treat a dying woman like that? I was immediately done.
Channo Sagara 2 years ago
20 years seems a bit long. Please have more self respect and confidence. Also, good riddance.
Rosecrucian Roeth 2 years ago
No one should ever, EVER put up with s**t from anyone for any length of time, no matter the circumstances!!
Josh Gilland 2 years ago
It's kinda weird how many of us seem to only stand up when it's done to others but not to ourselves
#17
She got married and cut all contact with me.
20 year friendship tossed aside like a used napkin.
BatPhace 2 years ago
How sure are you that the husband didn't isolate her like a typical abuser though? Maybe it wasn't about you?
Mrs Irish Mom 2 years ago
I got married and my best friend cut contact with me until she got married and then she decided we could be "friends" again because she couldnt stand that i got married before her
Roger9er 2 years ago (edited)
My wife had a really close friend she'd share everything with. And I mean like, everything. They met when they were like 16 or something. I met my wife when she was 18, and of course through her, her friend as well. Really nice personality, we saw them find a good husband, a house, kids, the works. Friendship still lasted very good, we saw each other on a very regular basis. Then, now 6 years ago, out of the blue, she sends my wife a text, saying she needed space in her life, that she appreciated my wife, but there was simply no room for her anymore in her life. Needless to say my wife (and me too) was baffled. My wife sent her a text back that she would always be there for her, even in the worst of times and she could knock on our door anytime, but her friend cut all contact. We never spoke to her or saw her ever again. Just too weird.
deanna woods 2 years ago
My sister's best friend dropped her after she got married as well. It turns out that she had been telling the husband and conflicting stories about each other. She was telling my sister that he was abusive which caused my sister to become protective. She told him that the reason my sister didn't like him was because she was a lesbian and wanted her friend.
Hans Georg 2 years ago
Had a similar situation, but my best friend decided that it would be better to work on a weekend than to come to my wedding. Also, I married his sisters best friend. After that all contact was cut.
Channo Sagara 2 years ago
Need more info. I mean I was a stoner who hang out with bunch of gangsters. If you have trouble imagining how bad my circle of friends are, at 20 i had to burry a friend who died because of liver problems from too much drinking. Also had to console her widow. Yes, they were married by accident at 18. Anyway, I found an amazing girl, we got married and she turn me into a better person. I cut ties with all of my stoner friends. They helped me survived the streets, they basically saved my life, but I'm sorry I just can't be a part of those s**t anymore.
Sven Horlemann 2 years ago
I got a male version - "He got married and cut all contact". Because the wife was envious of the connection, the history she got no chance to compete with. Lost 2 great friends like that. So stupid. As if there is a competition...
#18
They became homophobic, started misgendering our trans friend on purpose, and was overall very hateful and homophobic for no reason.
Delta Dawn 2 years ago (edited)
I had a friend do the same. No reason. There’s a strong movement rn among religious conservatives in America to absolutely deny the trans experience - even among people who had never before been transphobic.
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Mistiekim 2 years ago (edited)
I don’t think someone becomes homophobic. It was there all along.
Quirinus 2 years ago
If you can stop being homophobic, then you definitely can become one. Same with racism
Load More Replies... deanna woods 2 years ago
It is pretty strange that they started acting like this out of the blue.
Channo Sagara 2 years ago
A couple of years ago, i would instantly believe this story. But nowadays, LGBTQIAA+ people are so caught up in their movements, literally just looking at them wrong can get you branded as hateful, homophobic, bigot, or whatever. You can be branded as satan himself just for using the wrong pronoun. Many of them are so obsessed to get offended. So yeah, I'm taking this post with a grain of salt.
Tobias Reaper 2 years ago
i just dont understand this how does it affect you if someone asks you to refer to them by their chosen gender if someone changed their name you wouldn't call them by the wrong name i mean you might at first by mistake until you get used to it but why are people up in arms about it let people live their life how they want they not hurting anyone
The Grim Shadow 2 years ago
There is no such thing as a transphobic conservative, they are trying to preserve morals, and human biology. Transphobic implies that we are scared of trans people but we aren't, we just don't want our kids being told to cut their d**k of if they want to wear a dress
Sky Render 2 years ago
The ignorance in those statements kind of highlights why the transgender community is rightly terrified of conservatives... People who are transgender don't identify as their assigned gender, they aren't telling anyone to physically alter themselves (well, transmedicalists do, but that community has been forcefully removed from the transgender community for their extremist views). Also... aren't numerous conservatives trying to get bills passed to hard-lock gender to what birth certificates say? Kind of sounds like they're the ones telling kids they can't wear dresses to begin with. Oh, and incidentally, "human biology" is way more complicated than "male or female". There's absolutely in-between, it's called intersex. You probably know a fair few intersex individuals and don't even realize it, and there's a decent chance they don't either as western society has worked VERY hard to erase us for a long while now.
Load More Replies...So-called fair-weather friends, on the other hand, will only want to be a part of your life when everything’s sunshine and rainbows. The moment things get tough, they’ll be nowhere to be found… only to pop back up again when you sort your problems out yourself.
It’s also worth noting here that folks who are jealous of you and try to put you down when you achieve some sort of success may not be worth spending much time around. And if you feel utterly drained, irritated, and upset after meeting up with someone, it may be worthwhile focusing on some of your other—healthier—relationships.
#19
After more than 20 years of being besties, she just ghosted me. After a year of not hearing from her, despite reaching out, I asked her husband if she was okay. He was confused because she claimed to be talking to me all the time. Whatever. It hurt for a while, but she honestly brought very little to my life in hindsight.
- 2 years ago (edited)
Wow. That's a great point. Using someone else as a cover for an affair. Might not be the situation here, but it's a possibility. Extra sh*tty and exploitative if that's the case.
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janet frost 2 years ago (edited)
Yeah, she's having an affair. My friend of 40 years pulled the same thing on me when we went to Las Vegas, she just wanted to hook up with an old BF. B***h
Narwhal Blast 2 years ago
My former best friend did that to me. She found a boyfriend and she didn't even have the time anymore to respond to texts. I had no idea what happened. We went from talking and hanging out daily to barely talking anymore... that really hurt.
Upstaged75 2 years ago (edited)
My best friend and I have known each other since 1984. We live far apart and aren't great about communicating, but we at least try to get together at Xmas (our parents live just a few minutes away from each other and we're always both there for the holiday) and send each other birthday cards. The last 2 Christmases she has ghosted me, which I forgave because she has a huge family and was busy with her kids. Last year on her birthday I sent her a funny gift that she loved. This year she not only didn't contact me at Xmas, but she completely blew off my birthday. To say I'm hurt is an understatement. We haven't missed a birthday since the 90's. But I'm not going to be the one who reaches out to her this time. It's ALWAYS me and I'm tired of feeling like I'm carrying the relationship. I've ended one sided friendships before because it make me feel like they really don't want to be my friend. The fact that my BEST friend has now done this to me is heartbreaking. :(
Kathy Kennedy 2 years ago
Hmm, her husband might wanna check who she is talking to. Isn't talking to you while telling her husband she is???? Was she also doing girls nights with( out) you or working late while not getting a bigger paycheck
#20
Pathological liar. Told me he was dying. I was so distraught. Complete utter wreck. Nope. Not dying. Healthy af. He's still alive now 20 years later. Must be the miracle medical intervention he didn't need and didn't get.
tw 72 2 years ago
The older I get the less likely I want to be the one to fill the holes in someone else's life. It's friggin' exhausting.
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Shannon Daberkow 2 years ago
My daughter's ex boyfriend said he had brain cancer and lured her in. Then he had a blood clot, then testicle cancer, so they had to have kids fast!! He never had cancer! They had 2 boys together and over 1.5 years ago, he murdered her outside her work. He has physically assaulted me. He means nothing to me, he's going nuts, cuz I said that my daughter is going to haunt you. Can't wait to hear he's been shanked!! Forever Shelby's Mom 24 🌸🌷💐🙏💪💜
Celtic Pirate Queen 2 years ago
My OTHER toxic AF sister, whom I haven't spoken to in over 20 years. Told everyone she needed a kidney transplant & I refused to get tested as a donor match. But, she might DIE. Not my f*cking problem. I knew damn well she was lying, she was ALWAYS lying to be the center of attention (she was a thief, too). Well golly - fast forward 6 months and It's a miracle! Her very vague kidney issues had magically cleared up. I took a great deal of pleasure in telling people "I told you so".
Channo Sagara 2 years ago (edited)
Damn... One of my closest friend also lies all the time. I kinda got used to it, because we go way back, and putting up with your friend's b******t is kinda what friends do. They're just small lies. Like, have you ever go to this club, or have you ever eat that exotic food... i absolutely don't mind giving him the small spotlights when we're in a group, but when it's just the two of us, and he's clearly lying to me, it kinda annoys me, like "dude, i know you, why are you lying to my face?? You already have my approval since long ago, what are you trying to prove??". He's actually a nice guy. I just hope the lies won't suddenly escalate into something huge one day...
Tristan Schultz 2 years ago
I am so sorry to hear about your daughter Shannon Daberkow,and I hope that guy gets shank too.
#21
My best friend for close to 15 years blocked me. When I got in touch with him I asked what was going on, and he said he was just purging his friends list. Said it was a mistake and unblocked me.
Well I happened to be dealing with the loss of my father (who basically adopted him) and was struggling with alcohol abuse. I reached out to him just seeking a friend cause I was in such a low spot, then he blocked me again.
I totally get cutting off friends who are alcoholics or toxic. But the only time I ever asked him for anything was "Hey man, not sure if you heard but my dad died. I've been drinking too much and could use a friend to talk to."
And he blocked me for that.
AnnaRachelle 2 years ago
No friend at all. I sincerely hope you are doing well. People can be so cold and cruel
Richard Michael 2 years ago
Yeah, I doubt that is what he blocked you for. There's a lot of spin in your story. As an addict myself, it sounds like you are leaving a lot out, either intentionally or from being a black out drunk.
kath morgan 2 years ago
Is this the other side of one of those “I became their therapist” stories?
Vinnie 2 years ago (edited)
I don't think this person was using their friend. I've been the emotional support animal for someone and could not sustain it in the long run. I was the emotional support for a widowed friend, saw her every weekend. Neglected my husband for a year (thank goodness he took it well). The support continued for another year... and then came the pandemic - I called every week. She never called me unless we had made plans to go out. In contrast, I'm still friends with someone who has serious health issues. She stays in touch when she can and asks how I'm doing. I try to be helpful where I can, such as listening, asking about her beloved dog, and doing research.
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Littlemiss 2 years ago
I call b.s. I have known quite a few addicts, and that is their nice way of saying I abused the c**p out of them and they grew a wouldn't stay my doormat anymore boo hoo.
hitex 2 years ago
He blocked you for being vulnerable & honest about struggling with alcohol?! Shame on him. This would have sent me into a drinking spiral - the "friend" acted in a way that was cruel & harmful to an addict who was honest & vulnerable & seeking help. His friend belongs in Hades
kansasmagic 2 years ago
Yep, know this, although the particulars are different. The real kick in the a*s is that I had so many "friends" who never hung out unless we were drinking. So many friendships that were just based on drinking. No surprise that someone could develop a problem in that environment; the surprise is that those former drinking buddies will drop you just like that.
#22
She was unvaccinated and refused to take a covid test before seeing me. My mother was terminally ill and severely immuno-compromised, so I was absolutely trying to minimise the risk of getting covid so I could still see my Mum. She refused to take a test, twice, despite kind and calm requests and explanations, on the basis that she "didn't want to get a sinus infection." (This was in the time of nasal swabs, not mouth swabs, for covid tests. You know, those nasal swabs that are sterile and can't cause infection.) I'm 100% sure that it wasn't about a sinus infection. It was about control. She had been annoyed because I hadn't validated her anti-vax stance in the past. Similarly, I know she wanted more validation for her religious views, which she'd acquired in her 30s and which I didn't share. I'd told her that I was happy her faith made her happy, but I think she wanted me to truly share her beliefs. I'd also said that her sister's bisexuality was "fine with me" when she'd stated that a wedding of 2 women was "not what God wants." I think all of those different views just threatened the way she saw the world, and how she saw herself. Her last texts thanked me for "sharing my views" re covid and it's potential to kill my Mum, then became pseudo-concerned when I didn't reply. I read the whole situation as "I want to say whatever I want to you, but I want to still feel like a nice person, so please reply and give me that validation." I didn't reply to her, but I still ask myself whether the mature thing to do would have been to clearly reply and state that I didn't want to stay in contact. It's taken me until now (over a year later) to see through the pain and formulate what I might have said. We'd been friends since the first days of high school. 20+ years. In essence we just aquired very different views from each other as adults, but I can't pretend her attitude towards my Mum, and towards the horrible journey my family had to take, wasn't devastating. Life is a bloody painful journey at times, that's for sure.
Steph 2 years ago
COVID cost me a lot of friendships, too. Two died, and a few got in such conspiracy-theories that I had to doubt their sanity. But worst: one was a political official, working in the law department. He and his family (anti-vaxxers) flew around the world with fake vaccination- certificates…. while sueing others for giving false or incomplete references of quotations on dissertation papers. I lost respect for him - such a hypocrite!
FABULOUS1 2 years ago
My little brother is so deep into conspiracy theories that its hard to watch his mind spiral. He cannot hold a conversation with anyone without eventually bringing one up.
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Jon Steensen 2 years ago
And an almighty god needs mere humans to step in to have his will done and prevent marriage between two women? You'd think that if he really was against that stuff that he could and would do something about it on his own. But apearently that is not happening.
Steph 2 years ago
I Hope some kind of God or almighty Justice exists! 🙏🏻 I don’t know whom to pray to, but I pray and hope it does! I‘m not deeply religious , but the historical figure JESUS, who I think really did exist, was all about love. If he were to live NOW, I believe he‘d say: „it doesn‘t matter who you love - it matters how you love! It‘s about true kindness.“ I hope I am not wrong with my believe….💕
Load More Replies... deanna woods 2 years ago
Covid has been a difficult time for everyone. It has let us know how people really think about certain issues and it has shown how selfish and inconsiderate they can be.
Delta Dawn 2 years ago
Oh the old pseudo-concern when you call someone out on their b******t. That’s always a confirmation that you did the right thing.
AnnaRachelle 2 years ago
I am so sorry you and your family had to go through this. You are much better off without her. Horrible,selfish person she is
hitex 2 years ago
Let me.preface by saying I've only had first 2, my husband 3 but my child has not been vaccinated due to risk of myocarditis at her age (I have minor family members with this condition pre-covid). Given that, all 3 of us would, & have taken covid tests when requested to do so by a family member or close friend we are visiting. It's respectful. My child has a close friend who is immunocompromised & she takes one prior to any playdate they have & I do too if I am.tagging along. To each their own, but friendship involves mutual respect for each other even when you disagree
#23
She slept with my then boyfriend. The most boring tragedy of my life.
Alexandra 2 years ago
Well, you have to admit, a cheating boyfriend is rather pedestrian nowadays. In that sense, I can understand boring.
Load More Replies... Josh Gilland 2 years ago
Con - you lost 2 people at once OR pro - you cut 2 sacks of s**t at once
Michael Largey 2 years ago
She removed a s****y boyfriend from the OP's life. Many genuine friends never get the opportunity to perform such a valuable service.
Clown fish 2 years ago
Mine did this twice. First time I forgave the second time I left her with the stupid f#cker and went to work and never spoke to her or him again
I’mSoEmotional 2 years ago
I had a roommate who slept with several of my friends at my birthday party. Made me wonder about all of them.
Channo Sagara 2 years ago (edited)
"boring"? Yeah another post that could use more context. For readers, OP could be the antagonist who stole the main character's crush, but she won him back and everyone live happily ever after. We don't know.
#24
Knew him since elementary school. Always abrasive but, that was just him. He went to Europe to go to college and met some really snooty Europeans and came back a horrible person. Like he used to talk nonstop about debt and how he wanted to start a business and only hire people with debt so that he could mistreat them and they couldn't afford to quit. Not joking.
So I tried my best to get him to come around, but he was so rude to grocery store clerks, etc. that it was almost a story that sounded made up for internet rage bait.
I was straight out of college at the time, and I accepted a night shift job. I compromised my sleep and I'll tell you, the job did not pay well. And he kept pressing me and pressing me to ask me how much I made. I finally gave in, and he lorded it over me.
So one night before I punched in for the night shift, we went for coffee and he casually said something like, "Yeah, anybody who gets out of bed for less than six figures is a sucker," knowing full well what I made.
After about 20 years of friendship, I said I have to go, said goodbye, walked to my car and got in. I turned the ignition and as the car was starting I said, this friendship is over. And I never, ever looked back.
And another friend guilt tripped me about it, said it was awkward that we're not all friends anymore. This bad "friend" walked into another friend's butcher shop, used his friendship with another buddy working there, to run up a tab of several thousand dollars and then never paid.
"Oh sorry that's business," was his reply.
I'll tell you, since cutting him out of my life I live much, much, much happier. Had I never stopped being friends with him, I would have never grown so much as a person.
baby frog 2 years ago
hey, i know someone like th- holy f*****g s**t. there’s wayyyy too many toxic people in my life
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Joann Hart 2 years ago
Isn't it interesting how people like that look down their noses on the working stiff? When it's all those working people that keep us all fed.
Sven Horlemann 2 years ago
Not sure what the 'Europeans' triggered, but that sounds like he would be on that kind of behaviour anyways. European here. :-) Anyway, moving on sounds like the best decision.
--- 2 years ago
I'm in Europe and we also have people with this arrogance. They're everywhere, negative human traits weren't invented by Americans
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#25
I was in a horrific auto accident, coma for a week, ICU for a month. The person who was my closest friend never came to see me, when I finally got home, wheelchair bound, when he came over his first question was what kind of drugs did they give me. It was supposed to be a joke but I told him that we’re done being friends and not to come back to my house ever again. That was 17 years ago.
It was very difficult for me to sit there and tell the person that I no longer wanted to be friends and to leave and never come back. I was lucky to have support of close family which help ease the pain of losing a friend. I had a bunch of acquaintances that disappeared after my accident and during my recovery so I took the position of good riddance.
Monday 2 years ago
Ah this is something I would have done out of awkwardness....Humour is my primary coping mechanism so if I nearly lost a good friend I would definitely ask if the doctor's "gave them the good stuff". I don't know how it works in other countries but here you can't visit someone in the ICU unless you're family, so not visiting wouldn't be a red flag.
Chrissie Anit 2 years ago
Yeah, that was my thought as well. Some people are just not good with grief or with hospitals or with dealing with such severe injuries. This is the first case in this thread where I think OP was too harsh and too fast with their judgement.
Load More Replies... AnnaRachelle 2 years ago
I broke my ankle,it shattered. 11 days until surgery due to swelling. Bedbound before surgery. In a lot of pain standing afterwards. I had had my best friend for 15 years. I drove her wherever she needed to go. Visited her in hospital every evening for 2 weeks taking her whatever she needed. I lent her money a lot. Half the time I wouldn't take it off her when she offered. We laughed so much and our children were close. But when I needed some support she was nowhere to be seen. It stung a bit,I have to admit. I had a new boyfriend at the time. When I txt her saying I could not believe she had not come to mine to see me,she said...I thought HE was doing everything for you you didn't need me. I told her that day what I thought of her and that our friendship was over. That was 7 years ago. Best thing I ever did. When I look back she was such a negative person.
Ned Hargreaves 2 years ago
This happened to me. It was a major medical event and all those people who said " if you need help just call" couldn't even find the time to come by for a cup of coffee?
Maisey Myles 2 years ago
My big brother came to visit me in hospital after I had my first child. I thought that was so sweet and caring of him since we were never that close. Turns out he wanted to know if the Dr had given me pain pills and to give them to him.
Laura Halterman 2 years ago
I had a similar experience. I contracted a very rare pneumonia. I was in a coma for a while, ran a crazy high fever which caused some brain damage, and my family was called in as it was thought that I was dying. When I got out of the hospital and was in a rehabilitation center to help me learn to walk, talk, and how to make my brain follow directions, my best friend from childhood and her mother came to visit me. I was doing better about being able to talk but sometimes it came out all jumbled. They were there for about 30 minutes and she stood up, told me she was leaving because she didn't like the person I had become, and left. Have to admit that was a big kick in the stomach until I got to come home and had the support of my real friends. The best thing is that I made a great recovery, went back to work, and was promoted to a great management position. Her loss, not mine.
Greennovator 2 years ago
Some folks have a phobia of hospitals and even being around severity ill/injured. You didn't give much to go on here, but it's possible he was embarrassed and feeling bad-awkward about not coming to see you before.
matt adore 2 years ago
U.S. : Only family is permitted to visit while in ICU... At least the 4 times I've been in there in the past 20+ years. The last 2 times I had to fill out a form so my Partner could be with me. Another thing... A very good friend was terminally ill in the hospital and we were able to visit him. I thought with my own personal experience, I'd be fine. Wasn't. Our last hang out was awkward and I just didn't know what to say. I miss him and keep our good memories at the front. Love you, Scott.
#26
I had a mate that went through some tough times with his partner. I supported him with late-night chats, gave him a place to stay, and even kept my mouth shut when he cheated on her. Fast-forward a couple of years, I ended up going through some tough times myself and was on the verge of bankruptcy. He didn't give a s**t. Whenever we spoke, conversations always pivoted to how well he was doing and how much money he was making. I always got the impression that he was glad I was struggling.
Fast-forward another couple of years, and things have turned around for me. I'm doing well, have a new job, and was able to move to a great location outside of the UK. He came to visit once and spent the whole time slagging off where I lived, how s**t my job was compared to his, and even dropped a couple of hints that he didn't like my girlfriend (who's now my wife). He went back home, and I never contacted him again. Apparently, he posted something snarky on Facebook about not being invited to 'his best mate's wedding,' but I'm not on Facebook, so don't care.
Amelia Jade 2 years ago
Three years for me! One of the best thing I've ever done for myself.
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PetetheGeek 2 years ago
Alright, dude seems pretty bad, but you also should have told his partner about the cheating thing, it doesn't make you a good friend to lie about something so big
Stargazer Lily 2 years ago
Thank your lucky stars that he didn't like your gf/wife, he probably would've tried to sleep with her. Or maybe that's why he doesn't like her. He probably tried & she told him to eat dirt. Better off without him. 🙂
matt adore 2 years ago
"Not on facebook, don't care" (sic) Totally using that... In fact, I think I have been for the past 20ish years! The old adage: "out of sight, out of mind .."
#27
Over 10 years of friendship. We travelled together, worked together, he was the best man at my wedding. We were best friends, the kind of friend you could call any time of day or night and he’d be there to help. I was there for him through difficult times and vice versa. Then he met his now wife… Suddenly any gatherings at my house they couldn’t attend because she was always sick from “something she ate”… She was from a wealthy family, the kind that literally owns a small island, and lived in an affluent neighbourhood. It’s not like I was poor or lived in a bad neighbourhood but by comparison, I’m sure the very thought of her being in my part of town made her sick. Anyway, I moved overseas, received a save the date for their wedding but the invitation never showed up. He reached out asking if I was coming and was shocked I hadn’t got the invitation as he wanted me there but it was too late to make arrangements and a long way to travel. I received an email from him while he was on his honeymoon telling me how jealous he was of me and my career and new life overseas. I travelled back to see family and friends a little while later and tried to make arrangements to see him but he was “too busy”… I was literally in the same building as him visiting old colleagues. I’m convinced his wife is the reason my invitation got lost in the mail and that it all came out on the honeymoon and now he can’t look me in the face.
Channo Sagara 2 years ago (edited)
You're seriously blaming a man who listens to his wife?? I mean, sure the wife sounds sketchy as hell, but if you're blaming a dude for trying to maintain his marriage, godamn... If anyone should take the blame in this story, it should be the wife. Dude is just unlucky that the wife turns out to dislike his bro. Could've been a more firm husband, but definitely don't deserve a "good riddance".
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Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
What attracted him to his rich wife? Definitely not her sweet and kind personality.
Brent Echols 2 years ago
And he's fine with all of it, or it would change.
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Azure Adams 2 years ago
Once he's divorced, and if he's not whipped there will be a divorce, he will reach out. It he does so in a humble way, consider it.
sherry powers 2 years ago
Don't blame him, probably the wife and he's probably too scared to do anything about it.
I’mSoEmotional 2 years ago
This may be true but I’d verify it. Often we make assumptions without getting all the information. I had a friend turn his back on me because another person told him I’d said a bunch of things I hadn’t. The guy misinterpreted everything I said and my friend believed it without talking to me. I finally contacted him and he said to come to his office. I think he thought getting me on his “turf” would make it easier to confront me. When he told me what he was told, I said “and you believed that?!” He was embarrassed and I told him he should get all sides from all involved before assuming he knows what was said. I lost my respect for him and he was a judge.
#28
We booked a group holiday before we all went to University. She picked the place, picked our rooms, who was sharing with who, she planned the whole itinerary, she *told* one of the other girls in the group she was driving the 3+ hours drive as well, didn't ask, just told her to do it. She then ditched us every night to talk on the phone with her boyfriend for 2 hours, then go to sleep without telling anyone and was generally a controlling, moody b***h the entire trip. But the reeeaaal stinker: 2nd to last day she suddenly says work has cancelled her next 2 days of holiday and she has to go in. We all knew she was lying. Next thing she says is she can no longer take any of us back home. The other friend who drove there wasn't going home when we were leaving, she was driving onwards to see family elsewhere. B***h friend said best she could do was drop rest of us at a train station. Reminder we were 3+ hours *drive* away from home, which translated to 6+ hour train journey with multiple changes. Ends up with b***h friend leaving 6am the next morning, without a word, and my other friend had to reschedule her plans to drive the rest of us 2 hours in the wrong direction to meet my poor mum, who drove 2 hours to meet us halfway at a service station on a random motorway. None of us have seen or spoken to her in over 10 years, since she left that morning.
Holy Shimmering Sheeps541t 2 years ago
Off topic but I once picked up 2 hitchers going to Glastonbury Festival, picked them up J8 of the M25 and drove them literally to the gate (I worked at Glastonbury), 4 hour journey. Their response "bye". Never again.
#29
He cheated on his wife and left her and their two kids.
baby frog 2 years ago
what my dad did. but he still comes around just to remind me that he’s got a better life without me. guess what a*****e? i’ve got a better life without you. i don’t get the constant fear that my dad will leave, because he already did. i don’t fear losing anyone anymore, because the one person that mattered the most already left. at least i can focus more time on myself, rather than a narcissistic alcoholic. excuse my rant. thanks for listening.
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bottomless.abyss.of.bordem 2 years ago
I appreciate that you don't want to be associated with this scum sucker.
Channo Sagara 2 years ago
Again, could use more context. Straight up, that's an a*****e. But in real life, wife could've been abusive or pathological liar. Would you blame johnny for leaving amber??
#30
She snuck around for a whole summer keeping the secret that she was f*****g and had a relationship with my dying father. she was of age but he was in his last months of life, not in his right mind. hard to look past, she still reaches out every now in then trying to reconnect but it’s just too damn weird.
SuperChicken 2 years ago
I don't know what the fekking heck I just read, either. My brain disintegrated.
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Will Cable 2 years ago
I wonder if he was wealthy and she thought that she could get something from him by doing what she did.
Janet Sparrow 2 years ago
Yeah that's what I say. But thanks for "FUCKITTY F**K", great expression!
Load More Replies... #31
I found out through one of their friends she thought wouldn't share. She had slept with my past 3 boyfriends and I was in the same house sleeping one of those times.
anarkzie 2 years ago
To quote The Spice Girls "if you wanna be my lover, you got to get with my friends". Bad jokes aside that is really messed up. Some people that have obsessions with their friends do crazy stuff like this to try and imitate them. I would not be surprised if she's a got some deeper issues than just really liking the same guys.
Nicole Weymann 2 years ago
Alternative explanation: the friend who "wasn't supposed to share" invented the story to look/feel important/was jealous/whatever. (I'm not saying it happened that way, but from what little explanatory text there is it's no more improbable than THREE consecutive boyfriends cheating with the same woman)
#32
One of my best friends in high school; he knew I had a massive crush on a girl. He was well aware that I was a bit awkward and not very confident, so he offered to help me out. He invited the young lady in question and me to hang out at his place, to get us in the same place and give me a shot. Then he had sex with her while I was in the next room. I realized what was happening, and just sat there, unsure how to process what was going on. At some point I left. We never really discussed it. The friendship puttered along for a short while longer, withering away after that. That event, along with a few other earlier experiences made it so I've never been quite able to trust other guys and form friendships with them as anything more than acquaintances. To this day (I'm 38) I don't have a single close male friend. One of the few things I dislike about myself.
kansasmagic 2 years ago
My only/closest male friend lives hours from me. We keep in touch by email, and I can still share things with him, but that's about it. I am convinced that there is a (largely invisible) epidemic of friendlessness. We have this idea that couples are in a kind of isolation chamber. It's just you and your s.o. But I think people need friends. We need people with whom we share interests, accomplishments, challenges, and, yes, personal difficulties. A lot of people can't meet all those needs with just one person and it often isn't fair to expect that one person to carry such a heavy load. Not saying it's impossible, but I really believe now that most people need their "tribe" to really thrive. And I'm a socially anxious introvert! I don't need a crowd, just maybe 2-3 good friends who can give my wife a break from me!
Scrolling Panda 2 years ago
Patriarchy teaches men to treat other men like c**p. It's cuts them off from emotional support and community. It breeds loners. Learning this can help you push back and form healthy bonds with other men.
kansasmagic 2 years ago
I think this is hugely important. Men are told from a young age that other boys/men are competition (for girls, status, money...); and even if they aren't told so explicitly (my dad never said anything like that), it's still a common message in pop culture. It also means that a lot of men put *all* their s**t onto their girlfriend or spouse. This is rightly seen as toxic, a relationship "red flag," etc. but few people who call that behavior out also point out that the underlying problem is that lots of men have been conditioned to believe that they can't be emotionally vulnerable around other men. Friendship requires openness and trust and, yes, often vulnerability as well. I have felt intense loneliness at times, sometimes along with worsened symptoms of depression (which I think is an inherently isolating condition), even when surrounded by people, because all of those "acquaintances" did not add up to even one "friend".
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Kathy Loman 2 years ago
Why? You don't have to have male friends because you're male. It's totally understandable. 🫂❤️ That's a solid reason to not have male friends. Like yourself in the fact that you're of sound mind and don't want that kind of drama again.
kansasmagic 2 years ago
To each their own, of course, but I think one reason men need/benefit from male friendships is that otherwise we end up dumping all our issues on a girlfriend or spouse. Some girlfriends/spouses may be understanding, but most, I think, would prefer it if their boyfriend/husband did not have other close female friends. Personally, I don't think there's any reason why I can't be friends with other women, but my wife might disagree! She would totally encourage me to have a few male friends, though.
Load More Replies... Richard Michael 2 years ago
I have more female friends than male, for similar reasons. There is nothing wrong with it.
Angie Falzarano 2 years ago
Don't dislike yourself because you few male friends. I'm f and only a a couple of female friends because at some point what female friends I had treated me like sh#t and back stabbed me. The majority of my friends (95%) are male. They treat me with respect. Now most are gay but it doesn't matter they treat me better than any female has. So embrace the people who you can trust and treat you right. It doesnt matter the gender. What matters is how you are treated.
Rosecrucian Roeth 2 years ago
Know that feeling but I don't dislike myself for that, I just have better relationships with women than men, and plutonic at that!
#33
I'm not completely sure. Our mothers have been besties since elementary school, and they had us a month apart; while we were night and day, personality-wise, and probably should have been the complete opposite, we were besties, too, closer than sisters, from birth until we were 25. She had gotten married a few years before, moved a couple hours away and had her first baby, so naturally, our dynamic had shifted some, but I was still under the impression that we were as close as ever the night she called and told me that her life had changed, she no longer had time or energy for a friendship like ours, and that she pretty much just didn't want me in her life, anymore. There was no falling out, we hadn't had a fight since we were teenagers, there was nothing that I could pinpoint (then or now) that led to her decision, but it broke my heart and I grieved the loss for years after.
Azure Adams 2 years ago
She's going to regret that in her 40s but her pride will get in the way and it will destroy her
baby frog 2 years ago
had a friend who did that to me. stopped talking to her in middle school, and she came running back when she broke up with s/o. i told her i was done being her doormat, that she needs to figure it out on her own, i’m not her mother. she tried guilt tripping me but i just walked away. that pissed her off so bad she actually switched schools
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Xenon 2 years ago
I can understand the shift in the friend dynamic when one gets married and/or has kids, but there is no reason to cut the friendship. Maybe socialize a bit less due to demands of kids, etc. Lunch date vs clubbing. Go with the friend to the park where the kid can play when old enough... I just don't understand cutting a really close friend out in these situations.
tw 72 2 years ago
Exactly. I wonder what in that friendship was taking so much "time or energy for a friendship like ours."
Load More Replies... ROSESARERED 2 years ago
I've lost friends who got married and had kids. I wasn't included anymore, single, no kids. It hurts. But we all choose our path in life...we went on different ones...have new friends now, but I miss some, not all, of the old ones
Rhonda Wandler 2 years ago
Had a friend of 20 years drop me. At the group thing we went to once a month I approached her 4 times and gave up. It hurt for a few years. I think anyone who cant or won't explain is a crappy person, good riddance.
#34
He became addicted to [drugs] after his father died. It warped his personality, and he was constantly angry and bitter. He was unpredictable, and genuinely scared me because it felt that it would be very easy for him to do something that would ruin his life in an instant. Also refused any help offered. The only thing I could do was move on.
Jon Steensen 2 years ago
The thing about addictions (drug, sex, gambling or just the far more common alcohol) is that it really hard to combat, and as a bystander, there often is very little you can do. So eventhough you want to help, you need to be really careful not to dragged right down into the missery with the person you desperately try to save. Being close to an addict will not just influence their life, but could also very well ruin yours, as their problems could very fast develop into your problems, and the power of the drug can be so strong that it can make them do all kinds of awfull stuff to you just to get their next fix, which will often manifest as them manipulating and gasligthing you. You helping them can be just what they need to be able to keep the abuse alive without hitting rock bottom, and hence it can be to do them a disservice. So sometimes cutting your losses can be the best strategy - hard as it may be.
Mistiekim 2 years ago
I have a friend going through something similar. It isn’t drugs, but a family situation that drains her emotionally. None of the parties involved will do anything to make their lives or the situation better and she’s tried many times to help. It’s incredibly hard since it’s family, but I keep telling her she has let them go for her own sanity and well being.
#35
Not being invited to her wedding after being close friends for nearly four years. The other two people in our friend group were bridesmaids.
Irina Khruleva 2 years ago
Your friendship wasn't mutual. I was friends with 3 coworkers, who were friends before I started working at the place. We became friends, hung out together and such. All 3 of them are married now but only one of the girls invited me to the wedding. And she actually invited everyone including these other girls but I was the only one of her friends who came because the wedding was in another city. She said she was surprised I accepted and that offended me a bit.
tullotoe underfoot 2 years ago
That could have been from a place of self loathing more than a judgment on you. Considering the other 2 couldn't be bothered to show up.
Load More Replies... Steph 2 years ago
That‘s sad. Did she ever explain why? Could there be someone in that group playing unfair? Like badmouthing you to the bride?
Josephine Blogs 2 years ago
All the posts on Bored Panda are taken from Reddit, so sadly the OP will never see your reply. But if you click the "shark-giraffe" link under the post it will take you to Reddit and you can reply directly to the OP there. 🙂 The OP posted that 20 days ago and never explained why. So we're all none the wiser. 🙂
Load More Replies... Donna Peluda 2 years ago
My childhood friend did that. in our early 20s he came to see me at a club I worked at. We went for a bite afterward and talk about his GF who wanted to married ASAP and he wasn't sure about it bla bla bla. I paid the bill and went home. A few days later I bumped in to his brother we chatted for a bit and he said see you at the wedding!!
#36
She turned out to be super f*****g racist. I just had no idea because she’d never had the opportunity to show it until she moved to a city with brown people. I was horrified and I honestly have no idea who or where she is anymore and I do not care at all.
tw 72 2 years ago (edited)
Kinda the same. We met while both living in a large, liberal city. Friends for 30 years. Later, she moved to a very small, predominantly white town in a very red state, where FOX news is the news of choice. Over time, I found myself thinking, "Holy smokes. Who is she?" Haven't spoken now for about 5 years.
baby frog 2 years ago
racism is a HUGE no for me. had a girl who saw a white boy wearing cornrows and started saying things like “he can’t wear that. he’s white. he has to be black to wear something like that.” i left. i’m so done with racism it pusses me off so badly.
HighNMightyBigshot 1 year ago
Naaaahhh....actually you’re the one that’s racist.
Load More Replies... #37
Had a “best friend” who always expected everyone to cover for her whenever we go out to eat and would always whine about being “broke.” This one time I had a peak of her looking at her bank account and she had more than enough money to cover for herself. She just didn’t wanna spend any of her money.
Hans Georg 2 years ago
How the rich get richer. Let the others pay. Not assuming that she is rich, but you have to start somewhere.
tw 72 2 years ago
Sounds familiar. "I prefer to not spend my money like that. I want to save my money for traveling."
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Vinita Talaulikar 2 years ago
Had quite a few colleagues who would never spend. Just sponge on others... Made their money this way.
Maisey Myles 2 years ago
I may have enough money in my account to pay for lunch but that doesn't mean I can with all my other expenses- most of which are automatically deducted from my account. But, if I couldn't afford to go I would have declined the invite. I have a dear friend with money- she invited me to go out no told her I was "financially embarrassed " and couldn't justify the expense of a night out. She told me it was her treat and I reluctantly went out, but I would never ever go out with the expectation of someone paying for me
Julie Schulz 2 years ago
I've never heard the term "financially embarrassed" before but I kinda like it!
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#38
Pre-paid cellphone plan. It's 18 years ago at this point, but my then best friend pocket dialed me, while my phone was laying on the desk in the classroom. I was in a different part of the school working on a project. Some of the guys in class answered the phone but didn't or forgot to hang up when they realized no one was on the other end. The call ended up lasting long enough that his rough 25 dollars on the phone plan was used up. He ended up calling me the day after, calling me all names under the sun and where I could go to f**k myself. I had no f*****g idea what he was on about, and when he explained that his phone plan had been emptied I offered to just pay it back. Got told to f**k off. Never talked to him since. I even met him at a train station a few years later, smiled and waived at him. He literally turned around and walked away, waiting for the next train instead of taking the same train as me. I guess our friendship was only worth 25 dollars to him.
That Goth Demon (zey/zem) 2 years ago
I can understand being a bit annoyed at losing 25 dollars but still, ask what happened and don't just fly off of the handle
#39
When I realized he and his wife prioritized their failing polycule over their kids’ happiness. The moment you neglect your kids around me, it’s over.
#40
She was an insufferable narcissist and I was too young to understand
#41
My best friend (well used to be best friend)...we met when we were both 7. She had just moved to my town and from that very first day...we were inseparable. Fast forward 35 yrs later. My oldest son passed away and after his funeral, she and I spoke maybe a handful of times on the phone and then after that...nothing. That was a little over 6 yrs ago and if I had to say, or give a reason as to why we don't speak to one another anymore...I guess I'd say it goes back to my son's death. She stopped calling me. A lot of people distanced themselves from me. At first I just wrote it off to people not knowing what to say to me or not knowing how to be around me during the initial grief, but as weeks turned into months....turned into years, I really struggled with loneliness and just wanting our friendship back. I'm sure (and most that grieve the loss of a child can relate) it wasn't just her avoiding a friendship with me but I probably distanced myself quite a bit as well. It hurts not having that one friend that you used to call and tell everything to and I'm sure the day will come when we may run into each other. But until then...I just miss the old times I guess.
Jason Kruse 2 years ago
This happened to my parents as well after my brother died. It really sucks.
#42
They would use me as a vent and treat me very horribly like completely ignore me for a whole day resulting in me thinking what I did wrong then magically talk to me the very next day as if that never happened and when I would question her she would say " sorry I was in a bad mood" . This happened a couple of times she used to publicly ignore me when I initiated convo then proceeded to make a ' You're so annoying face' , isolate me. I was fine with it , I thought that she might be having a rough time and had no where to vent. My final string broke when she suddenly ignored me again and talked very rudely when I asked her something, the very next second I saw her laughing happily with 'my friends' and rolled her eyes when she saw me. I stopped talking to her from the next day and my friends all together it was no surprise that none of them ever came to apologize for treating me that way let alone reconcile with me . Although I was disappointed that our friendship only amounted this much to them. I lost my friends but realized my own worth the hard way, got stepped on and humiliated, it was probably because she saw me as a very convenient person , I was sad but I never regretted cutting them off. Good riddance.
#43
Probably when she was jealous that my boyfriend picked me over her (they had never even spoke she saw him once and said he was hot) and then went around to all of our mutual friends calling me a man stealing wh*re. So yeah we were done at that point. Anyway I ended up marrying the guy and sent her a save the date but no invite.
Steph 2 years ago
But that’s not cool either. Were you out for revenge? I understand you were hurt by her actions, but it would have been more sophisticated to just not provoke her and rubbing your happiness under her nose…. but then again: I don’t know the full story and I‘m sure you had your reasons. All the best! And better friends for you in the future! ❤️
#44
I was going through a divorce and my father died. Decided partying and alcohol was my new coping mechanism. They went along for a bit. I moved to another country to get rehab and they moved off to Washington and got married. I got right but I never heard from them again and they have a child now. I miss them still, near daily, 10 years later. Was my best bud. I was a s****y friend.
Richard Michael 2 years ago
At least you can come to terms and admit it. That is way more than the average person would do. The only way to grow and change is to take personal responsibility of all of your actions. Past, present, and future.
Maisey Myles 2 years ago
Did you ever offer an apology for treating them badly when you were drinking?
#45
She told me she had cancer and her parents were abusing her. Found out everything was a lie.
#46
Just got tired of being ignored when I would try to make plans to get together or hangout. I'm not going to beg someone to be my friend. Friends for over 15 years and now haven't spoken to each other in over 3 years.
Richard Michael 2 years ago
That's called dead weight. He wasn't a real friend, just an opportunist.
Wysteria_Rose 2 years ago
Happened to me. I moved away for a few years and then moved back and kept attempting to make plans for us to finally meet and hang out again. Every time, they couldn't, they were busy, they thought they had plans that weekend. Told them to choose a time and they never got back about it. There were a lot of other red flags from before I moved, so it was a sad realization it wasn't a relationship worth keeping in the first place.
#47
She cheated on her boyfriend (a very close friend of mine too), broke up with him on his birthday (after he gave her lots of beautiful presents for her graduation), and started a relationship with the lover. Then, she cheated also on this other guy, and started a relationship with the lover, her current boyfriend (until the next one, I suppose!) She “asked” me for some advice, in both situations I told her to break up first with the boyfriend and then try to think about it with a little bit of emotional distance, but nevermind she decided to follow her “instinct”. I decided to follow my integrity, I couldn’t stand anymore a friend like her in my life. I just felt very disappointed. That happened in the last 5 years, we are in our late 20s. EDIT: now that I opened my memory closet, I remember another red flag of her. During the early days of Instagram, her profile was plenty of my photos, made by me with my camera, that I only uploaded on Facebook because I wasn’t using Instagram. When I created my profile on IG, I discovered it. I confronted her and she told me that she wanted to “impress” people and said “look at the bright side, they have lots of likes!” EDIT 2: another resurfaced memory! One of the last times we hung out together, she bragged about her money and her job, clearly in order to make me jealous. Not an elegant move.
Kim Shannon 2 years ago
It's people that brag about having the most that actually have the least
#48
As a teen I had extremely low self esteem and didn’t care if people were mean to me as long as they called me friend. I spent like 8 years hanging out with this guy who would constantly belittle me in front of people to make himself seem “better”. One day he introduced me to a group of friends that kinda liked him but he still wasn’t technically apart of their group. They all saw how he treated me and the moment my friend was out of ear shot, they all took turns telling me I don’t deserve to be treated that way and that they thought I was super cool and that I should not hang out with him. After that day I stopped hanging out with and talking to him.
#49
They started making rude an inappropriate comments, made it into a me problem by calling me too sensitive. The whole thing just got exhausting really. I was always the one that was there for her, but it was rarely returned. It's funny though, how someone who prides themself on their own self awareness can't figure out that when they have conflict with their boss, coworkers, most of their friends, most of their family, that they might be contributing to the problem?
Sunchaser 2 years ago
I got that song reference! Not even a Taylor fan! :)
Load More Replies... Julie Schulz 2 years ago
I have some family like that. I may not recognize all of my faults but how can you not see that sometimes the common denominator is not everyone else 100% of the time?
#50
When she forgot my birthday. I know it's silly but her actions spoke volumes. I was there for her when she gave birth to both her kids, supported her. I was her bank and when I lost my job and had to supplement my income doing IC, she didn't HEAR me when hi said I couldn't fund her pockets whenever she needed help. 11 years of friendship down the drain. Completely cut her out my life.
Rostit . 2 years ago
Im guessing "internet content" ie Only rotating air moving devices.
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#51
When I was 24 I discovered a good friend of mine had been having sex with minors for the past 3 years. I'm now 35, moved away, and the last I heard he was in prison for heroin possession, theft, arson, and 2 counts of felonious assault with a deadly weapon.
#52
Would “bust my balls” in front of attractive women to make himself look better. I was always confused because there was 0% chance of competition. There’s a point where it gets old and you never look back.
#53
Never was a great friend, bit fun to hang out with. Then he got a toxic girlfriend. We were roommates for awhile and living with her was hell. They decided to get their own place, and I came to realize how miserable I was living with them. Getting away from it showed me how bad it was. So I made a decision, I didn't want anything to do with his girlfriend. Unfortunately since they were dating, cutting her out meant cutting him out. I've moved on, met new people and things are starting to pick up.
#54
Kind of just snapped into place that she was a terrible person one day. We went out for coffee and she screamed at the barista for messing up the drink she ordered off the "secret" Starbucks menu. She was all excited because she'd slept with my best friends roommates boyfriend. Was furious over me "choosing sides" because we (me, my best friend, and her roommate) went out to a bar without her.
#55
She was facing a lot of professional, personal, and financial difficulties due to some really poor decision making on her end. I was thriving, and she was never happy for my success. When I finally got a job promotion I’d worked really hard for, her reaction was one of anger and jealousy, and I decided I no longer needed that energy in my life anymore. Friends should always celebrate each others victories.
baby frog 2 years ago
yesssssss! one of my friends passed a really difficult test and i was soooo happy for them. i had some money on me so i went and bought them something they wanted. (not expensive i’m broke af and they’re very understanding and not greedy). continued to congratulate them and make sure they knew how proud of them i was. :) it was finals so ofc i was super excited for them
#56
Had a friend who fell into the world of “social media micro influencer” and it’s completely destroyed her life. She is now a shell of the person she once was; nothing about her actions are genuine and she only ever participates in activities if they can bring her attention/clout or views. The sad part is, she knows she has no more friends (I’ve heard that she gets drunk and cries about it to anyone who will listen) but can’t understand that she’s responsible for pushing them all away by reducing them to props and background noise for her tiktoks. She thinks Covid destroyed all her friendships but it was actually just her own, selfish behavior. We’re all in our mid to upper 30’s so she’s too old to be acting like this in the first place and it’s just really pathetic watching her try to keep up with people half her age by recycling their content.
#57
When he had everything going well for him in life and bought cool sh*t while I was living poorly, he'd rub it in my face. When I started being successful and finally made something for myself, he couldn't stand it.
#58
We'd been best friends for 40+ years. I was always the one to run to rescue/help her, even when her husband was holding her and the damn baby at gunpoint. But she was also very critical and a bit of a snob, like her mom. She would tell me to throw out my shirt because it was too worn out, get a pedicure because my feet look like c**p, wear a different lipstick because the color looked horrible on me, etc. So one day I just decided that I needed to talk to her about how she treats me, and asked her to meet me at a restaurant near her house. I was SO NERVOUS and upset that I was already crying before I got to the restaurant. I explained that she really needs to keep her opinions to herself, be more subtle with her comments (offer to pay for pedicures for both of us), or ask if she could give me advice on something, anything was better than what she had been doing. We left the restaurant after she apologized, gave me a hug, and we went put separate ways. She called me a couple days later and said I was "too negative", never heard from her again.
#59
My best friend was cheating on her boyfriend (who was also my friend). I told her she had to stop, tell him, or break up with him. She continued to cheat. One day he asked me if she was seeing someone else, and I couldn’t lie. Years after that we hung out a few times, but obviously it was never the same. Don’t remember that last time we spoke now.
Scotira 2 years ago
Had something similar happen. I was told by mutual friends that the then gf of my best friend had been cheating on him with another friend from our circle. I told them they were crazy for even thinking I would keep that to myself. I was prepared to deal with the fallout of telling him rather than the fallout of him finding out later on that I knew all along. It caused a rift in our group of friends and almost broke the whole group up. Sometimes I still feel that rift even so this happened more than 15 years ago. To this day I stand by my decision, I can't abide cheaters.
#60
My "best friend" asked me to be her maid of honour. I was planning her wedding, speaking to vendors and etc. On the day of her wedding, she never spoke to me at all or acknowledged my efforts even though I was fixing her makeup and coordinating with her vendors and organising things like bring her family/friends to the right seats etc. I could see from the corner of my eye that she was having fun with her other bridesmaids. I was ok with it and was actually happy that she was happy and I had a part to play in that. Towards the end of the wedding night, she did not thank me for the day and actually told me that I could have done better with the music and other stuff. I was so tired and just left after everything was settled. Then I realised this was how it was through our years as "best friends", that I was always there but she was always too busy for me. She tried to reach out a few times after the wedding by saying she was sorry about what she said and she was truly appreciative. I never replied.
Kim Shannon 2 years ago
She's not sorry or appreciative. She just misses you doing stuff for her.
#61
After high school ended, he became too busy. I invited him over every weekend, each time he said that he come, but didn't show up. After a year of him not coming, I stopped inviting him.
genevievelovespurple 2 years ago
you invited him over every weekend for a whole entire year? and he didn’t show up even once? he is not a friend honey.
#62
She was mad at me for something then proceeded to ask her Twitter followers to stalk, harass and send me death threats. Then got mad when I told her she’s a horrible person and didn’t know why I called her that.
#63
Hey boyfriend sent me a d**k pic. She knows and is still with him.
Charlie the Cat 2 years ago
But I love getting sent pictures of ducks! 🦆Who doesn't love a duck pic?
Rostit . 2 years ago
Its dECk pics. People get offended when you send them pictures of Trex or unstained cedar.
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#64
I had a friend--Blindsey--and we played a lot of league of legends and other videogames with each other for a number of years and grown quite close after meeting on IMVU. I got into a relationship and disappeared but we kept some talking going sometimes. She got married later which was wonderful, very nice guy. Well one Thanksgiving I sent her a message saying, "Happy Thanksgiving, love you" and her husband saw this and threw a fit. They slept separately for a week and it ruined the thanksgiving that year. She blocked me everywhere but not before telling me what had happened and why she has to do this. I understand but I'm hurt. There was never a romantic relationship between us and saying, "I love you" was kind of a normal platonic thing between us. Oh well. I appreciate the time we had before and I love those memories. I miss my friend but we've probably changed so much since that we couldn't be friends today. Miss you Blindsey, hope you're well.
Scotira 2 years ago
Ffs men and women CAN be just friends and even best friends. I know, my best friend is male. To be fair my husband told me, in the beginning he was a little jealous, but after seeing us together he understood we were more like siblings than anything else 😁 my best friend and I behave very much like siblings.
Julie Schulz 2 years ago
I'm sorry to hear that happened. Some people are just too insecure to accept that I love you can be said in a platonic, friendship type of way.
#65
This just happened to me this week. I realized she only wanted me around to have someone to complain to and go places with her because she hates being alone. We had been friends nearly 3 years but the friendship started to sour back in January when she got back with her alcoholic cheating husband. Slowly I started to realize she didn't care about my interests or how I was doing and that we only ever did things she wanted to do. In fact, a lot of things I like she said she didn't understand and they were dumb to her (fair enough I guess?). My last straw though was her telling me that being called dramatic is bad for her mental health. I called her dramatic because she was being dramatic over a lice situation at work (we work in healthcare, it's not uncommon to get an outbreak of lice every once in a while). Our boss told her if she was going to freak out every time she's definitely not in the right profession. She ended up quitting the very next morning through text. Well, I had decided to quietly go no contact with her and removed her from all socials. Two days later she realizes this and starts spreading rumors to my coworkers that I was planning to quit with her and that I blocked her on everything. I'm just done with her. If she can talk sh*t behind my back that easily over me just not talking to her, what else has she said about me? That is not the kind of friendship I want. Sorry for the long rant.
#66
My friend let me know they had a major grudge about a small incident that occurred *years* earlier, which they never mentioned to me before. Then they told me that they didn't like my partner, or the fact that they exist. It was worded very aggressively. It was just bizarre. I told them I was sorry and that I didn't want to know them anymore.
#67
She was living with our other mutual friend and that friend's long- term significant other (I'm talking like seven or eight years together). They were both unemployed and she would buy them food, weed and was taking care of all the household bills. Turns out they were sleeping together for at least year during this time. I just couldn't after that. There were things she'd done to me personally as well but this was my final straw.
#68
I had too many dives into depression and all that comes with them for my bff to handle any longer, and this was all before we hit 35. My life is awesome now: great career, good relationships, contentment. But I sure wish he was still here to share it all with him. Our mutual friends never seem to know where he is or how he is doing, and I don't know if that is manufactured or authentic. I sure hope wherever he is that he is living it up because he was a once in a lifetime dude.
#69
Him saying "what have you done for me?" in an unprompted call-out. He was holding food I bought him, with a bag with drawings i made for him. The friendship was completely one sided. Watch out for all-take-no-give people, guys.
#70
Seeing my old friend group constantly post photos to social media of them out doing things and having fun while I’m sitting at home I brushed it off at first. But after I made it clear when I was off a few times and still got no invites I just stopped contacting them
#71
She gave me shit for wanting to go back to school to complete my degree. She was lonely and she wanted me to move to her small town and rent the other half of the duplex she and her husband owned.
#72
We just grew apart. I think I reached out to her once to ask how she was doing and didn’t really get a response, so I just kind of decided that was that.
#73
The hardest part when a longtime friend stops talking to you entirely is when you don't know why. You assume that it may be that a mutual friend said something about you that isn't true but you'll live the rest of your life not ever knowing why.
Vinnie 2 years ago (edited)
If you've tried to contact them, then you've done your best. Hard not to know, but you tried. May time and living your life reduce the pain.
Load More Replies... #74
She was abusive, mean spirited, and just all around terrible to me. She turned our friend group against me and spread rumors about me. She would put me down in front of other people. She was jealous when I hung out with others. Etc etc. We lived together during my junior year of college. After I moved out we never spoke again.
#75
I was friends with this girl in college. One semester we, my friend group, decide to be in a group for a semester long assignment. There were multiple parts to the assignment, one was going on a class trip, each person taking a section of a paper, and then the last was a display of some sort. On the day we were compiling the display for class, this girl says she had a doctors appointment but she would hurry back. That would be fine because everyone didn't get out of classes to meet up until a certain time. She didn't show up because she went out on a date and then got her car washed. Which she posted on snapchat. She showed up 20 minutes before the class started and our other friend who had been helping us, WHO DIDNT EVEN TAKE THE CLASS, had to give her the what-for because we were all so furious. It was after that that I had looked back and realized it wasn't the first project she jeopardized, and she did some other shady shit like put another friend in a dangerous situation. After that I cut her out of my life completely.
#76
Had a friend who was a liar and wanted to be me. One day she even copied and pasted my face onto a pic of herself. Anytime I had something going on, she miraculously had the exact same thing going on as well.
#77
One of my friends from high school went full on "traditional Christian" as in thinking women should stay in their lane and let men run things. Started acting better than a number of us in our friend group, like he'd been enlightened after reading the Bible for a few weeks and discovering the truth, while trying to convert others into his new line of thinking. I had grown up with a narcissistic super religious father and had already decided to cut ties with him, so I was fully aware of the type and where he'd be heading. Tried to reason with him about it but he got pulled in too hard and had to let him go.
#78
When they "Forgot" to meet up with you for the third time even though you planned those meet ups days in advance.
#79
She just stopped talking to me in covid. I was in her wedding and we had been roommates. But then she told me weekends were for her husband, which actually meant weekends were only for other couples. A mutual friend got married and didn’t invite me to the wedding, and we never spoke again.
#80
She started seeing my very recent ex while I was still very upset about the breakup, she lied to me about it (“we’re just friends”) and then refused to talk to me about it when they were clearly and openly not just friends. I spoke with him (the ex) about it and he apologized for the way things happened. She didn’t and still hasn’t, years later. Good riddance.
Rita Benkő 2 years ago
What? How long do you suppose to "own" a person after breakup?!? She did not involve the ex in your relationship. She tried to keep the distance between you and your last heartbreak. I say good riddance - for her.
Fun Fan 2 years ago
I wouldn't like to be your friend, if you see this situation normal. It's not about owning a person, it's about timing, let some time pass for things and feelings to settle down, before you are hooking up with your friend's ex. There is a word: emphaty, may you look it up the meaning of it.
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#81
He became a gaslighting narcissist who attempted to use me any way possible for his own personal gain on the pettiest levels imaginable. It reached a point I would instantly become in a bad mood when he came around, because I had to put my defenses up, or else he would walk all over me. Just to make himself feel superior, for whatever reason. He wasn’t always like that, but grew that way over time. He would even somehow find a way to make my friends, my joy, and my achievements, HIS. Like, it’s honestly amazing someone is capable of that level of manipulation, it’s actually impressive.
#82
She ruined my 21 birthday, before that she would only come to me for advice or a shoulder to cry on but when i needed it she would redirect the conversation right back to herself and so much more that she would do but the last straw was my birthday. I went all the way to her city bc she lives in the big city and we would celebrate my birthday. so i was gonna stay for two days, we were supposed to go to a restaurant but she had invited some of her own friends to join us. but we never went to a restaurant now did we? no ofc not. she took me to a fkn club. i don’t drink, i told her specifically that i didn’t wanna drink and when i realized it was a club i was so mad that i told her i didn’t want to be there and her other friends would jump in and make me uncomfortable to even have that conversation with her so i just shut up. the next day i told her that was fkdup and she apologized. She did the same thing that night. i went to her apartment by myself and left her at the club. i am really uncomfortable at clubs i just don’t enjoy it. she knew that. but did this anyway. It was long overdue to end the friendship, she had been such a negative and toxic impact on my life anyway for years. we haven’t been friends for a year and it only took me a week to feel such a relief and the weights on my shoulders just went away. i didn’t realize how badly she was affecting my own mental health that it felt like paradise only a week after.
#83
I took my computer out of storage and needed to access some files on it. Took it to my "friend's" flat in London. I couldn't move it right away so he said I could leave it there for one week. Couldn't get back to London in time so he put it out on the street out of spite. Best mate for 30 years until last year. Why would anyone do something like that you might wonder? He told me that would happen if I didn't pick it up. So it was "my choice". Full on high spec machine put out for trash.
Rita Benkő 2 years ago
How often do you use your friends' places as your storage space? A computer is not that big that anyone, who lets you put it in their apartment, would discard it after a set date. Your story seems an umphteenth overstepping of boundaries.
#84
Best I can figure, she got divorced, I didn't. She got new bf, and that was the end of it. Last time I saw her, we ran into each other 7 years ago. We both cried. She said it was all her, she's sorry. I said lets get together for coffee or lunch. She said text me. I did. She wrote back let me check my schedule. That was the last I heard from her.
Chewie Baron 2 years ago
Rumour has it, she’s still checking it to this day.
Load More Replies... #85
Best buddies with a guy. Had some of the best times of my life with him. Went to a party we met this chick they started dating. As soon as we moved from our apartment we never talked again. They are married now Use to really be pissed about this but it happens all the time. Sucks cause we were so tight
#86
Went through quite a bit together but I started to realize it was rather one-sided on multiple levels for a long while, and then I would only hear from them when they needed something. I just faded on it.
#87
My friend in high school was kinda creepy and had a face to match. (Poor guy) He was very immature and did a lot of childish things and barely passed classes. I don’t think he has any mental illness but I don’t know for certain. He was a constant distraction in classes. But what was actually concerning was the fact he constantly made school shooting jokes and even bragged about his family owning an AR-15. He showed pictures of it at school and when anyone would ignore his childlike behavior he would threaten to shoot up the school. To put it simply, I eventually stopped interacting with him much but kept a VERY close tabs on him. I’m glad those years are over.
#88
One of my old BFFs thought drinking and driving was a competition. No thanks.
Niki Hanley 2 years ago
I have some crazy ones. I blame myself for choosing those friends. We were friends in high school into college. I moved around a lot when I was a kid so I didn’t have any life long friends. She was very high maintenance andI put up with all of it because I enjoyed her company. Unbeknownst to me she was extremely jealous. She wanted every guy that we came across to want to sleep with her. I found out that included my boyfriend. She went into my phone back when we didn’t have passcodes. Found all the guys that I had numbers for and we’re trying to get them to like her more. The guys that I had on my phone were college friends and coworkers. One of my friends reached out to me and told me that she had pretended that I was coming and wanted to call him to see if you wanna come while I had to step away. He shows up and it’s just her. She did that with all of them including my boyfriend. I was getting ready to break up with him and she was defending him. It’s because they were cheating!
What do you think ?
Hakunamawhatnow 2 years ago
I have a lovely one! Had a friend that would never come to me, I always had to take a train to her or her brothers place. I decided to stop doing that and the friendship cooled off. After almost a year, out of the blue she contacted me. Said she was sorry and that it was all her fault. That we should meet up soon and she would come to me. Sure, sounds legit. Then, through f*****g Instagram of all options, she asked me if I wanted to be her surrogate mother since she wasnt able to get pregnant by herself, and I would be paid 1500 euro. Excuse me?!
ConstantlyJon 2 years ago
I realized after therapy that my 2 best friends growing up were sexually assaulting me from a young age. I texted them both that we shouldn't be friends, blocked them on everything, and never looked back.
AK to LV 2 years ago
I'm so sorry that happened to you. I'm glad you're rid of them! I hope you're in a better place now.
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Jennifer Smith 2 years ago
When I wanted to end it all I sent out a text to my friend group. Almost every one responded and helped me get through it but one ignored me. I was upset but thought there must be a reason why. She didn’t talk to me for two weeks. After two weeks she called and told me I only did it for attention so she didn’t give me any attention to teach me a lesson. I was so hurt by that. If it wasn’t for my friends who did respond I wouldn’t still be here.
Vic 2 years ago
I'm glad you are still with us, and I hope you are doing better!! 🤗
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tee-lena 2 years ago
We worked together at an amusement park. I needed a place to crash and she gave it to me. I did everything for her as a thank you. Including paying rent. Fast forward and we had moved to a 3bedroom apartment yet I'm still in the living room. Paying a third of the rent even though she, her girlfriend and her two kids had two rooms and only paid a third and another roommate paid a third. We (I) set up a surprise birthday party with a nice futon, with bedding as a gift. Someone paid their share late after it was all paid for so I took her kids to get a present for her with the money. Like 10bucks. I got woke up out of a sound sleep after the party with her threatening to choke me to death. That fu*king ten dollars that her kids got to buy her a present. She threatened to kill me over 10bucks. I stopped doing things for her. Full stop. And she hated me for it. As soon as I could I moved out. Ended the "friendship" the day I moved. She's a freaken narcissist. Put me off friendships of any kind. I won't be used like that again. It's been like 15years? People aren't worth the hassle. I don't know what it is about me that I find trash people but I stopped trying and my life is a lot calmer. A whole lot better. She fell back into drugs I'm just glad I got out before that
KrazyChiMama 2 years ago
I lost my two "besties" from school days because we all 3 got married but only they had children. Im unfortunately unable to carry to term and I guess my miscarriages were just too painful for them to remain my friends. I was there for one of them when they had a miscarriage when we were still teenagers. Even went with her to the hospital when she had her surgery for it (D&C)! I felt so alone with no girlfriends to talk to about things. My husband is more than supportive but it still stings when I let myself think about that time in my life. To this day I have no really close girlfriends. (Husband and I have a few couples we're somewhat friendly with) No one will ever hurt me like that again!
Joann Hart 2 years ago
Wow, I am so sorry that happened to you. Sometimes we find out who our true friends are at the worst times. Nobody should feel cast off during such loss.
Load More Replies... Diolla 2 years ago
Had a BFF in my early uni years. We did everything together. She got into an abusive relationship, guy beat her, but she beat him as well. They would break up and make up all the time. One night we met him in the street (at that moment they were not together) and she started to pick a fight with him. I tried to stop her doing that. For some reason the guy started to beat ME up. She just stood there. He stopped because a kind stranger intervened. I don't remember how I got home from there. The following days I did NOT hear from her at all. Mind you, we would spend all our days together. When I finally got hold of her (this was before mobile phones existed) she told me that him beating me up was sus and she thought he'd done it because I had secretly been seeing him behind her back. I mean WTF, I hated the guy because he hurt her and I had been through many situations with them (some of them violent) trying to protect HER. I ended the friendship right then and there.
NutellaBananas 2 years ago
I had this really close friend and we were besties. We were super close and we used to share everything. Last years I missed a few weeks of school because I was sick. Then months after I got sick (I was fine after that btw), she randomly started ghosting me. Like 2 MONTHS LATER!! and later she apologized for it and I'm like "omg it's okk, don't worry, I still love u" and we made up. But now she's ghosting me again. Like WTFF. And a few days ago I told her I need to talk to her and she's like "text it" and im like no its a face to face convo. And now she won't text me back. I so wanna forget ab her but then I remember all the good memories and I just can't do it
B-b-bird 2 years ago (edited)
We were good friends during college years. She flirted with my date, though she knew the situation, I forgave her. Strike one. Insulted me by saying she has time to meet only her "friends" but not me, when she got back to hometown (we had some minor disagreement). Strike two. Then we met on a plane completely by accident, just as she was coming back to hometown. She completely ignored me pretending she's asleep. And got off the plane from different door to avoid me. And we were not kids for that sort of behaviour! I mean kids even know better. It was strike three. Just though why I need to deal with it. Then after some time she tried reconnecting, several times, but I did not budge. Been 10 years, did not have such or even similar issues with other friends ever.
Hakunamawhatnow 2 years ago
I have a lovely one! Had a friend that would never come to me, I always had to take a train to her or her brothers place. I decided to stop doing that and the friendship cooled off. After almost a year, out of the blue she contacted me. Said she was sorry and that it was all her fault. That we should meet up soon and she would come to me. Sure, sounds legit. Then, through f*****g Instagram of all options, she asked me if I wanted to be her surrogate mother since she wasnt able to get pregnant by herself, and I would be paid 1500 euro. Excuse me?!
ConstantlyJon 2 years ago
I realized after therapy that my 2 best friends growing up were sexually assaulting me from a young age. I texted them both that we shouldn't be friends, blocked them on everything, and never looked back.
AK to LV 2 years ago
I'm so sorry that happened to you. I'm glad you're rid of them! I hope you're in a better place now.
Load More Replies... Jennifer Smith 2 years ago
When I wanted to end it all I sent out a text to my friend group. Almost every one responded and helped me get through it but one ignored me. I was upset but thought there must be a reason why. She didn’t talk to me for two weeks. After two weeks she called and told me I only did it for attention so she didn’t give me any attention to teach me a lesson. I was so hurt by that. If it wasn’t for my friends who did respond I wouldn’t still be here.
Vic 2 years ago
I'm glad you are still with us, and I hope you are doing better!! 🤗
Load More Replies... tee-lena 2 years ago
We worked together at an amusement park. I needed a place to crash and she gave it to me. I did everything for her as a thank you. Including paying rent. Fast forward and we had moved to a 3bedroom apartment yet I'm still in the living room. Paying a third of the rent even though she, her girlfriend and her two kids had two rooms and only paid a third and another roommate paid a third. We (I) set up a surprise birthday party with a nice futon, with bedding as a gift. Someone paid their share late after it was all paid for so I took her kids to get a present for her with the money. Like 10bucks. I got woke up out of a sound sleep after the party with her threatening to choke me to death. That fu*king ten dollars that her kids got to buy her a present. She threatened to kill me over 10bucks. I stopped doing things for her. Full stop. And she hated me for it. As soon as I could I moved out. Ended the "friendship" the day I moved. She's a freaken narcissist. Put me off friendships of any kind. I won't be used like that again. It's been like 15years? People aren't worth the hassle. I don't know what it is about me that I find trash people but I stopped trying and my life is a lot calmer. A whole lot better. She fell back into drugs I'm just glad I got out before that
KrazyChiMama 2 years ago
I lost my two "besties" from school days because we all 3 got married but only they had children. Im unfortunately unable to carry to term and I guess my miscarriages were just too painful for them to remain my friends. I was there for one of them when they had a miscarriage when we were still teenagers. Even went with her to the hospital when she had her surgery for it (D&C)! I felt so alone with no girlfriends to talk to about things. My husband is more than supportive but it still stings when I let myself think about that time in my life. To this day I have no really close girlfriends. (Husband and I have a few couples we're somewhat friendly with) No one will ever hurt me like that again!
Joann Hart 2 years ago
Wow, I am so sorry that happened to you. Sometimes we find out who our true friends are at the worst times. Nobody should feel cast off during such loss.
Load More Replies... Diolla 2 years ago
Had a BFF in my early uni years. We did everything together. She got into an abusive relationship, guy beat her, but she beat him as well. They would break up and make up all the time. One night we met him in the street (at that moment they were not together) and she started to pick a fight with him. I tried to stop her doing that. For some reason the guy started to beat ME up. She just stood there. He stopped because a kind stranger intervened. I don't remember how I got home from there. The following days I did NOT hear from her at all. Mind you, we would spend all our days together. When I finally got hold of her (this was before mobile phones existed) she told me that him beating me up was sus and she thought he'd done it because I had secretly been seeing him behind her back. I mean WTF, I hated the guy because he hurt her and I had been through many situations with them (some of them violent) trying to protect HER. I ended the friendship right then and there.
NutellaBananas 2 years ago
I had this really close friend and we were besties. We were super close and we used to share everything. Last years I missed a few weeks of school because I was sick. Then months after I got sick (I was fine after that btw), she randomly started ghosting me. Like 2 MONTHS LATER!! and later she apologized for it and I'm like "omg it's okk, don't worry, I still love u" and we made up. But now she's ghosting me again. Like WTFF. And a few days ago I told her I need to talk to her and she's like "text it" and im like no its a face to face convo. And now she won't text me back. I so wanna forget ab her but then I remember all the good memories and I just can't do it
B-b-bird 2 years ago (edited)
We were good friends during college years. She flirted with my date, though she knew the situation, I forgave her. Strike one. Insulted me by saying she has time to meet only her "friends" but not me, when she got back to hometown (we had some minor disagreement). Strike two. Then we met on a plane completely by accident, just as she was coming back to hometown. She completely ignored me pretending she's asleep. And got off the plane from different door to avoid me. And we were not kids for that sort of behaviour! I mean kids even know better. It was strike three. Just though why I need to deal with it. Then after some time she tried reconnecting, several times, but I did not budge. Been 10 years, did not have such or even similar issues with other friends ever.
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