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We all make fools out of ourselves every now and then. Nobody is safe from that unwelcome sense of anxiety once you realized the thing you just said makes zero sense. But things that leave your mouth, whether IRL or online, do stay there, oftentimes forever.

And there’s a whole corner of Reddit, r/S***AmericansSay, dedicated entirely to the mission of collecting the stupidest, funniest, and sometimes embarrassing cases of people being so convinced they know better when they couldn’t be further away from the truth.

So let’s ready ourselves for the ensued hilarity, ‘cause we are about to have a fair share of it, trust me.

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    #2

    “Who Was The First Country On Planet Earth To Ban Slavery? That’s Right, America”

    “Who Was The First Country On Planet Earth To Ban Slavery? That’s Right, America”

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    There’s an abundance of scientific evidence that shows humans are poor judges of their own abilities, whether it’s their sense of humor or grammar. In fact, psychologists believe that we are more blind to our own failings than we realize. This idea comes from the 1999 study in which David Dunning and Justin Kruger from Cornell University, New York, tested if people who lack skills and abilities are also more likely to lack awareness of their lack of ability.

    #3

    You're On The Internet, Which Is American

    You're On The Internet, Which Is American

    Nulligravida Report

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    wandiledludlu avatar
    Sum Guy
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The internet has helped us see how much of a total s**t show the USA is... they can't hide behind the propaganda machine we call movies

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    The results of the tests led the authors to the interpretation that accurately assessing one's skill level relies on some of the same core abilities as actually performing that skill. It led them to the conclusion that the least competent maybe suffering a double deficit.

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    #6

    Well Allocated Funds

    Well Allocated Funds

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    “Not only are they incompetent, but they lack the mental tools to judge their own incompetence,” Kruger and Dunning thought. During the course of four individual tests run on participants, the scientists discovered that “People who scored in the lowest percentiles on tests of grammar, humor, and logic also tended to dramatically overestimate how well they had performed (their actual test scores placed them in the 12th percentile, but they estimated that their performance placed them in the 62nd percentile).”

    #7

    Pridemonth

    Pridemonth

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    catherinemhomer avatar
    Cath Homer
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Homosexuality is illegal in Liberia. Maybe it was deliberate? *reaching*

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    #8

    'People Who Leave Their Phones Set To Military Time Are War Criminals'

    'People Who Leave Their Phones Set To Military Time Are War Criminals'

    reddit.com Report

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    blasphemousriots avatar
    Rick
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was older than I would EVER care to publicly admit when I learned that “military time” I often heard referred was not some secret, complicated way of working out the time you’re only privy to having served in the army but simply the reading of a 24 hour clock.

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    Dunning shared his impressions in an article for Pacific Standard: "In many cases, incompetence does not leave people disoriented, perplexed, or cautious. Instead, the incompetent are often blessed with an inappropriate confidence, buoyed by something that feels to them like knowledge." The phenomenon is known as the Dunning-Kruger Effect and most of us have surely encountered numerous cases of it in real life.

    #9

    Go To Panama, This Is America

    Go To Panama, This Is America

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    crabcrab avatar
    Hans
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would be tempted to argue that THIS is the virtual, borderless world....

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    #11

    “More People Use Imperial Than Metric”

    “More People Use Imperial Than Metric”

    Corporal-Porpoise Report

    #13

    People Engaging Me In German Because I Look German

    People Engaging Me In German Because I Look German

    Mr_-_X Report

    #15

    Where Does It Say In The Constitution Or Any Of The Amendments That Eating Is A Human Right?

    Where Does It Say In The Constitution Or Any Of The Amendments That Eating Is A Human Right?

    Liam_Noble Report

    #16

    "More People Know About Our Smallest State Vermont Then The Amsterdam"

    "More People Know About Our Smallest State Vermont Then The Amsterdam"

    Particular_Edge2308 Report

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    ryandeschanel avatar
    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "SHUT UP ! DON'T PROVE ME WRONG YOU FILTHY INFERIOR FOREIGNER!!!!!"

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    #17

    “We Will Never Rewrite The Constitution”

    “We Will Never Rewrite The Constitution”

    reddit.com Report

    #18

    Your Haircuts Are Un-American

    Your Haircuts Are Un-American

    3Squareheadz Report

    #20

    Hmmmmmmm

    Hmmmmmmm

    Classic-CJ Report

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    Eslamala
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sure, just like "america" celebrates other countries' independence day 🙄

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    #21

    Why Is Munich Spelled "München" On Signs In Germany?

    Why Is Munich Spelled "München" On Signs In Germany?

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    mariannekraus avatar
    Marianne
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Munich citizen here. I can confirm that we do, in fact, write signs in our own language. We are crazy people!

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    #22

    “...your Hip Would Break Because Their Medical Staff Is Garage...”

    “...your Hip Would Break Because Their Medical Staff Is Garage...”

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    luthervonwolfen avatar
    Luther von Wolfen
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I know people who have travelled to other countries to get medical/dental care because the air fair and other expenses plus cost of treatment were cheaper than in US. It is literally true.

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    #23

    Do You Guys Have Refrigerators?

    Do You Guys Have Refrigerators?

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    #24

    "Offended By Our Patriotism, Wattpad Girl?"

    "Offended By Our Patriotism, Wattpad Girl?"

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    #25

    The Titanic Is Just A Movie, Right?

    The Titanic Is Just A Movie, Right?

    unknown Report

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    blasphemousriots avatar
    Rick
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Canadians also think Star Wars was completely made up so I wouldn’t worry too much about what they think.

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    #27

    “I Am In Rhode Island”. “Nice, Ever Been To The USA Before”?

    “I Am In Rhode Island”. “Nice, Ever Been To The USA Before”?

    reddit.com Report

    #28

    Biden's America

    Biden's America

    unknown Report

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    blasphemousriots avatar
    Rick
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    *Random person falls down in Greece* “Biden’s America”.

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    #29

    "At Least American Toilets Aren't Just Holes In The Ground"

    "At Least American Toilets Aren't Just Holes In The Ground"

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    ryandeschanel avatar
    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Doesn't Angel Merkel just pee in the Spree ? Doesn't the queen's butler empty her chamber pot in the Thames every morning ?

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    #30

    What Does He Care? He's Not A Us Citizen, He's Not Effected

    What Does He Care? He's Not A Us Citizen, He's Not Effected

    sandiercy Report

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    james_fox1984 avatar
    Foxxy (The Original)
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I didn’t realise that the US was global, oh wait, they do have the World Series which only the US plays in. so I guess it makes sense lol.

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    #31

    Would Love To See Some Of These Countries Try To F With Us

    Would Love To See Some Of These Countries Try To F With Us

    louckak Report

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    markymarkandthefunkybunch avatar
    jaynekyra avatar
    Jayne Kyra
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am more surprised that Canada is at 2%, like Saudi Arabia.

    opus_8 avatar
    Martz Migraña
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I mean, their mining companies are really f*ING up Latin America, mate. (Talking about Canadians. And of course is also our fault since we fail to regulate better our natural resources in latam)

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    AnimalsRuleHumansDrool
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who hates Australia? The only to hate about is some politicians

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    MangleTangle
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought people hated America a lot more than 7%. Maybe its because I live there. It sucks

    miraculousladybugfanladybloglover avatar
    Miraculous Klutz
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What did Australia do? We are friendly! Aside from to emus. We don’t talk about that war.

    ps421 avatar
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    SykesDaMan
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Apparently it's a voting system... And anyone can vote for any country, even their own... Which apparently happens a lot... Weird! https://www.thetoptens.com/most-hated-countries/

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    vickyz avatar
    Vicky Z
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The akward moment that you realise your country is so small that you can't see the percentage! I can see it's green though!

    jazmynerines avatar
    Jazzy Mc. Jaz
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sound's american. They probably think this because almost everyone owns a gun.

    kelly_hartle avatar
    Kelly Hartle
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ugly Americans are everywhere. Once my dad was making small talk with a shopkeeper in Paris. She was being kind and speaking perfect English with him. Another American came stomping in making demands, and the shopkeeper simply shook her head. The American woman then looked at my dad and said, “You’d think if they wanted our money they’d speak our language!” Dad shrugged his shoulders and said, “No English!”

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    Eriu
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow Poland is way too low on this, I bet they didn't ask any Poles lol xD

    joesmith_12 avatar
    Joe Smith
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Americans hate Greenland. Probably because most of the citizens are smarter than them.

    juniorcucumber avatar
    Queen Cucumber
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who hates Australia!!! I'm an Aussie Maybe it's because of all of the murderous animals. But I'm 95% sure that you won't get killed if you come to Australia unless you mess with the animals

    shead26 avatar
    Steve
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who could possibly hate Canada? Australia I get just for the spiders, but Canada? They have beer and maple syrup!

    dariazotova avatar
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    Shelp
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There is a Canadian mining company who's exploiting land and minerals in Papua New-Guinea. They've destroyed several acres and forcibly displaced local tribes in order to keep on mining. I think it would be a good reason at least for Papuans to dislike Canada.

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    #32

    “The White House Is Bigger Than All The Countries You Named”

    “The White House Is Bigger Than All The Countries You Named”

    theelleintraveller Report

    #33

    "I'd Rather Receive False Information..."

    "I'd Rather Receive False Information..."

    Theemuts Report

    #35

    Commie Divas

    Commie Divas

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    N G
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ugh, this doesn't belong here. "Soccer" is a British word. Yes, the Americans took it and ran with it (no pun intended), but it originated in Oxford in about 1890. Americans didn't invent it.

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    #36

    (Sad) Mistake A North Korean Flag For A Texan Flag

    (Sad) Mistake A North Korean Flag For A Texan Flag

    GriffinFTW Report

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    gld199 avatar
    Gemma
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Plot twist: they're holding a sign denouncing Kim Jong-un.

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    #37

    But We Can Pock Whatever Doctor Or Healthcare Insurer We Want! We Win

    But We Can Pock Whatever Doctor Or Healthcare Insurer We Want! We Win

    Mr_-_X Report

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    Luther von Wolfen
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We can pick whatever doctor or hospital we want to be in debt to for the rest of our lives!

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    #38

    “They Started Faking An Accent”

    “They Started Faking An Accent”

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    troufaki13
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Some people believe that the Earth is 2000 years old. This one thinks it's 200 yo apparently

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    #39

    "[...]although My Ancestry Dna Gives Me Zero Italian Dna On My Dad's Side, I'll Stick With Being 1/4 Italian!"

    "[...]although My Ancestry Dna Gives Me Zero Italian Dna On My Dad's Side, I'll Stick With Being 1/4 Italian!"

    azulhombre Report

    #40

    "It's Amazing To See How Few Countries Know That "Soccer" Is The Correct Term"

    "It's Amazing To See How Few Countries Know That "Soccer" Is The Correct Term"

    Andros1510Ro Report

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    #42

    Is Mediterranean A Slur To Italians?

    Is Mediterranean A Slur To Italians?

    big-black-ramarro Report

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    blasphemousriots avatar
    Rick
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I’m actually going to start using this! “Ugh, you’re *so* Mediterranean”.

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    #43

    Are We Acting Like That's Not Possible?

    Are We Acting Like That's Not Possible?

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    #44

    "American Deaths Are Worth More"

    "American Deaths Are Worth More"

    zzvu Report

    #45

    European Countries Don't Have Elections As They Are Too Poor To Pay For The Patent Rights

    European Countries Don't Have Elections As They Are Too Poor To Pay For The Patent Rights

    StrammerMax Report

    #46

    Wait Other Countries Didn't Have To Sing Their National Anthem Everyday At School For 12 Years???

    Wait Other Countries Didn't Have To Sing Their National Anthem Everyday At School For 12 Years???

    reddit.com Report

    #47

    The Real Heros Are The Ones Who Served The Us Military

    The Real Heros Are The Ones Who Served The Us Military

    A_Cat_Named_Frank Report

    #50

    "USA Is Less Racist Than Those Scandinavian Ethnostates''

    "USA Is Less Racist Than Those Scandinavian Ethnostates''

    snusknugen Report

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    #51

    My Ancestors Are American And They Came From America

    My Ancestors Are American And They Came From America

    reddit.com Report

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    ryandeschanel avatar
    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe they are a 100% pure native american with a French surname and the Quebec province is a myth ? No. Definitely not. They are just an ignorant idiot.

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    #52

    Europe Is A Country

    Europe Is A Country

    unknown Report

    #53

    "Has Monumentally Contributed More To Mankind Than All Those Noted Combined"

    "Has Monumentally Contributed More To Mankind Than All Those Noted Combined"

    wienerlegende Report

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    ryandeschanel avatar
    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    China : banknotes and gunpowder. England : steam machines and modern plumbing. France : cameras and vaccines. Arabs : mathematics and astronomy. Germany : cars and printers... And don't get me started about culture, architecture, and arts.

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    #54

    Rank: Military Spouse

    Rank: Military Spouse

    Koeienvanger Report

    #55

    “We Invented The Car”

    “We Invented The Car”

    reddit.com Report

    #58

    "Europeans Have Pretty Much The Exact Same Culture And Genetics"

    "Europeans Have Pretty Much The Exact Same Culture And Genetics"

    abc_username_123 Report

    #59

    “Everyone Should Be Put In The Marines. Now”

    “Everyone Should Be Put In The Marines. Now”

    Faraz_rashid Report

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    indraservo avatar
    Indra Servo
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Reminder : kneeling during anthem is legal, while using US flag as clothing is illegal

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    #60

    "Healthcare Isn't A Human Right"

    "Healthcare Isn't A Human Right"

    Cuber32 Report

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    Something
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There are far more people using taxi services like they're EMS (not by choice).

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    #61

    "Good Luck Trying To Be A Billionaire Over There."

    "Good Luck Trying To Be A Billionaire Over There."

    _Kristian_ Report

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    rene_3 avatar
    René Kok
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your changes of becoming a billionaire are higher when education is free.

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    #63

    Well They Don’t Have Rights In England

    Well They Don’t Have Rights In England

    MedicalMango5 Report

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    ryandeschanel avatar
    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm sure they think the queen wears a black armor and rides her horse in the streets of London, beheading whatever filthy illiterate peasant does not bow down enough.

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    #64

    "I Will Not Comply"

    "I Will Not Comply"

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    breakmyheart avatar
    Something
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    By this logic, refusing to wear a mask will eventually lead to full nudity.

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    #66

    Futuristic Technology

    Futuristic Technology

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    #67

    "Europeans Don't Have Culture"

    "Europeans Don't Have Culture"

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    #68

    You're A Third World Country For A Reason

    You're A Third World Country For A Reason

    reddit.com Report

    #69

    Forks Are Uniquely American

    Forks Are Uniquely American

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    Luther von Wolfen
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They use Britsticks, which are sticks made of metal that have three or four pointies at one end. For soup, they use souptools, which were invented by Oxford don, Reverend William Archibald Spooner. Every male in England is legally required to have "Archibald" in their name at least once.

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    #70

    "I Would Like To See You Devote A Tweet To Memorializing The Victims Of 9/11. Thanks"

    "I Would Like To See You Devote A Tweet To Memorializing The Victims Of 9/11. Thanks"

    charizardine Report

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    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, remember a tragedy which happened 20 years ago in another continent.

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    #71

    "Come To America Where Our Dialects Are So Different Some Count As Completely Different Languages"

    "Come To America Where Our Dialects Are So Different Some Count As Completely Different Languages"

    garden_gnostalgic Report

    #72

    ”Why Does Italian Pizza Look So Bad?”

    ”Why Does Italian Pizza Look So Bad?”

    pandaron Report

    #74

    If Churchill Was A "Racist"

    If Churchill Was A "Racist"

    jmcs Report

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    Ryan Deschanel
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would, because it is true. Obviously, it does not mean we should tear their statues down, rename their towns and erase them from history, it does not make their contribution to the american history any less important, but they are not perfect gods and we should be able to mention those facts.

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    #75

    "If Your Leg Is Broken In Europe - You're Done "

    "If Your Leg Is Broken In Europe - You're Done "

    The_Meaty_Boosh Report

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    Allan Miller
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And they make the legs different lengths in Europe because the sidewalks are so uneven.

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    #76

    "My Expensive, Frequent Health Care Is Subsidized At The Expense Of Healthy People. I Think It's Great!" Thief

    "My Expensive, Frequent Health Care Is Subsidized At The Expense Of Healthy People. I Think It's Great!" Thief

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    #77

    "You Rarely See Iphones Outside Switzerland"

    "You Rarely See Iphones Outside Switzerland"

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    allanmiller avatar
    Allan Miller
    Community Member
    3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In Canada we carve phones out of wood and pretend to use them to impress our friends.

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    #78

    Only Americans Can Comprehend American Football

    Only Americans Can Comprehend American Football

    unknown Report

    #79

    Please Don't Bring This European Style Socialism To America

    Please Don't Bring This European Style Socialism To America

    reddit.com Report

    #80

    My Son Died From Covid-19 And I'm Still Voting For Trump

    My Son Died From Covid-19 And I'm Still Voting For Trump

    emix75 Report

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