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83 Funny Tombstone Names, As Shared By People On The Internet
All of us eventually meet the same end - we kick the bucket, give up the ghost, push up the daisies; you get the gist. And while ending bereft of life is an inherently sad affair, even then, some people refuse to succumb to despair and only wish to be remembered with joy and laughter. And it isn’t like there are only a few of them, as these funny tombstone names prove!
Okay, to be fair, these funny tombstones that we found on this gorgeous Reddit thread aren’t exactly real. Meaning, it’s people telling us what they wish to have written on their tombstones when the time comes, and not scribings from already existing headstones. However, it would be pretty amazing to find a Victorian-era grave telling us I’m with stupid →. And while there is no such thing now, we’re pretty sure at least half of the people on the list will continue with their short funny tombstone names promise and leave something to be remembered for centuries to come.
One last thing - if it’s not too morbid for you, please do share your own ideas for funny names on tombstones in the comments; that would be a hoot! But, of course, first, you’re going to need to read the funny tombstone sayings that people on this AskReddit shared, rank them the way you wish, and share this article with anyone you think might find this list particularly amusing.
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#1
"Slightly off topic…. but I saw a picture of a headstone once that had a cookie recipe on the back of it. The poster said that while grandma was alive, they’d ask her for her famous cookie recipe and she’d say, “Over my dead body”. So, when she died, they found the recipe and put it where she always said - over her dead body. I don’t care if it’s true or not; that’s savage and I’m here for it!"
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#3
"Philanthropist, entrepreneur, and all around pathological liar."
#4
"I asked to be cremated what the hell."
#5
"Unable to beat his personal record for most days lived."
#6
"Not appreciating my puns when I was still alive was a grave mistake."
#7
"Run you fools! A pine box and 6 feet of dirt won't hold him forever!"
#8
"You're probably wondering how I got here."
#10
"Here lies an atheist. All dressed up with no place to go."
#13
"The risk I took was calculated, But man, am I bad at math."
#14
"Delete my browsing history please."
#16
"You're standing on my balls."
Sami-Jo Ross 3 years ago
I saw one that said "if you can read this, you're standing on my boobs".
#17
"I want a fully nude sculpture of me, and at the base it says "Can't Touch This" And if you do it then plays the song."
#18
"Second fastest gun draw in the Wild West."
#19
"Error 404: corpse not found."
StitchIsCuteAndFluffy 3 years ago
Oh no. It’s starting. The apocalypse. *jumps with joy* I can finally be an awesome survivor with cool clothes and an awesome weapon! Me: *dies in the first 30 mins*
#20
"Died doing what he loved, screaming in agony."
#21
"Hold my beer."
stupidMonkey 3 years ago
...Watch this. This is what I want on my tombstone... with a built in cup holder
#23
"GAME OVER.
[ ] Continue.
[X] Save & Quit."
#27
"You should have seen the other guy."
#29
"Here could be YOUR advertising"
That Goth Demon (zey/zem) 3 years ago
Can we put a picture of floofy kitty bebes there pls then?
#31
"A shared link to a powerpoint presentation with Google stock images explaining why I'm never gonna give you up. I will keep rick rolling even in death."
#32
"I'VE STILL GOT 7 HORCRUXES LEFT!"
#34
"To be continued."
#36
"Look behind you."
StitchIsCuteAndFluffy 3 years ago
*looks behinds me* *sees ghost* *casually goes home, prays it doesn’t follow me, and try to live my life as if it never happened*
#37
"I was strolling through a small town graveyard as a kid and found a tombstone that said "Joe Thorpton - Died of Boredom in Brooklyn". Since then I have wanted that on my tombstone."
Maisie Rose 3 years ago (edited)
Is no one gonna question the fact he was casually strolling through a graveyard??
#40
"Be excellent to each other. Party on dudes."
StitchIsCuteAndFluffy 3 years ago
Like, keep the party going? Or step on guys? I’m down for either.
#42
"Only this tombstone? I was hoping for a pyramid."
Trophy Husband 3 years ago
I wonder if anyone has used "this tombstone identifies as a pyramid"
#44
"I told you I was sick."
VaferQuamMeles replied:
"Spike Milligan's epitaph. A very funny man.
I believe his gravestone actually says 'I told you I was ill.'"
Apatheist Account2 3 years ago
It doesn't actually say that - it was what he wanted, but they wouldn't let him have it. It's the equivalent phrase in Gaelic.
#45
"Pepperoni and sausage."
#46
"You can’t always get what you want."
#47
"He died as he lived: a virgin."
#49
"With my last breath, I curse ZOIDBERG!!!"
#50
"I've made many dumb decisions in my life, and only one of them got me killed." Aquahert replied: "Russian roulette without the roulette."
#52
"Press F to pay respects."
Pakutto replied:
"Don't forget an actual pressable F key attached to your gravestone."
#53
"Lorem ipsum dolor."
#54
"A problem has been detected and Windows has been shut down to prevent damage to your computer. The problem seems to be caused by the following file: LIVER.SYS."
#56
"I want to apologize to anyone who didn't hate me. I unfortunately didn't have the chance to make you hate me in time."
#57
“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”
#61
"PLEASE HELP I'M TRAPPED IN A TOMBSTONE FACTORY."
#64
"I'll be back!"
#65
"To find my hidden treasure, you must answer my riddles three..."
#66
"Hey, who turned out the lights?"
#67
"Here lies Nintendo1964. He could make one hell of a sandwich. Pictured: a big sandwich I made when I was alive."
#68
"I didn't have enough power on rise of kingdoms."
#69
"Respawning 3… 2… 1…"
#72
AntiTheory said: "A Steam review of Life: 309,936 hours played. "It's OK." Does NOT Recommend." SweetCosmicPope replied: "7.8/10 - Too much water." Aquahert also replied: "Kinda hard to live 2/10."
#73
"My body lies but still I roam." cooperkfb8 replied: "Roamer, Wanderer, Nomad, Vagabond, Call me what you will."
#74
"You're in a coma. Please, wake up!"
StitchIsCuteAndFluffy 3 years ago
Well, now that I’ve had my morning cup of hot chocolate and my existential crisis, I wonder what is next on the agenda
#76
"I didn't want to live on this planet anymore."
#78
"I should have played more EVE Online."
Klondike Penguin 3 years ago
Should’ve followed in KatiaSae’s footsteps. She managed to explore every corner of the EVE Online universe without losing a single ship. This took ten years to complete, and it all paid off with an in-game statue honoring her and a spot landed in the Guinness Book of World Records.
#79
"HE WAS NUMBER 1!"
#81
"Died Tragically Rescuing His Family From The Remains Of A Destroyed Sinking Battleship." 69420memes replied: "DTRHFFTROADSB."
#82
"Choked on Vomit."
What do you think ?
Ronnie Cutshall 3 years ago
Already have mine planned out. Lighting could not take me out. But she did.
Ronnie Cutshall 3 years ago
Already have mine planned out. Lighting could not take me out. But she did.
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