Parenting is a very contentious topic. Pretty much anyone you ask will have quite strong opinions on how best to raise children. At times, this can lead to fierce arguments online and in real life between people who mean well and have good intentions.
Social media user @HonestLeYo started a massive discussion on X (formerly Twitter) after asking everyone to spill the tea about their most honest and slightly controversial opinions on parenting. Scroll down to see what they had to say.
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Holy c**p at the comments in here!!! I 100% stand behind and give my full support to my GAY AUTISTIC son. Those of you who think less of my son or me can just shove your heads so far up your @ss that you choke on your own sh*t.
The X thread was a resounding success and reached many people all over the social network. At the time of writing, user @HonestLeYo’s entire discussion was viewed a whopping 65.4 million times. It just goes to show how much people care about the topic of parenting as a whole. It’s a topic that’s very relatable and close to many internet users’ hearts.
For every opinion on parenting, no matter how thought out and reasonable it might sound, there’s always going to be someone who’s going to counter it with their own take on things. People can have very wildly different perspectives and experiences in life. It’s no different where raising kids is concerned. Something that seems to work for one family might miss the mark in another home.
Funny. Mine complain any time I make a big purchase because it diminishes their inheritance. That's now the joke in the family if I take them out to dinner and pay I promptly thank them for dinner as it came out of their inheritance. So much fun to watch them squirm
If you have kids, then you know that how you approach childcare might be different from how your relatives, friends, coworkers, and neighbors do it. There are four main styles of parenting: authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and neglectful.
You might find that you fit one category very neatly or you’re a mix of two. However, they’re not all built equal.
Got yelled at by a parent because I shooed a child out from behind the counter where I worked. I worked at a pizza place at the time.. the pizza oven is 500 degrees. Your child almost took a header into it. *Where were you* and why aren't you watching your kid?
Mine has decided to change their pronouns. I don't understand it, but I accept it cos I love them 🙂
Though every family and child is indeed different, there are some things that all parents can do that are fundamentally sound. To put it very simply, research shows that it’s authoritative parents who raise the happiest, most confident, well-adjusted, independent, and well-educated kids.
Meanwhile, authoritarian, permissive, and neglectful parenting styles are severely lacking and can lead to serious issues down the road.
Yes. I always say that a big part of the world's f#ckery stems from the fact that people treat having kids as an obligation even though they're absolutely unfit for parenting.
Broadly speaking, authoritative parenting is about finding a balance between rules, boundaries, support, and love. It highly prizes open and honest communication, transparency, structure, as well as familial warmth.
Authoritative parents set very clear rules and expectations for their kids, but they also take their thoughts and feelings into account. It’s a great blend of discipline, fairness, and guidance.
I also give relationship advice to my friends even though I'm chronically single. It's about a different perspective.
That goes for the rate of pay, too! I don't care that you have 4 kids and cannot pay your bills, especially if you underperform. That does not give you a right to earn more money simply because of this. I've had this happen more than once when I found out someone was making as much as me without half of skills, education, and common sense I have. The answer was, "Well, he has a family..." That's not my problem.
However, authoritative parenting doesn’t simply happen in a vacuum. It requires a lot of time, energy, and patience to get it right. It means slowing down and explaining to your child why you have the rules that you have for behavior at home and in public. It means enforcing those same rules to show that misbehavior has consequences.
And it means constantly communicating with your munchkin throughout everything so that their feelings aren’t ignored. It’s a lot of work. But it’s worth it in the end.
The number of hockey/football/pageant parents I know with miserable children. Or, "I wanted to be a doctor but didn't get the opportunity, but you can!" The parents are never satisfied and the kids hate life.
Someone on Tumblr once said that "small children have the full emotional range of an adult person, but no experience to know how to handle them" and it has really changed how I look at kids getting emotional in public.
The alternatives are easier to implement because they require less effort on the parent’s part, but the results aren’t as good.
For example, authoritarian parents may set clear rules, but they simply expect their kids to obey them without taking their opinions or feelings into account. It’s all strictness without the support. And there’s too much focus on punishment than warmth.
Isn't that the expectation and the bare minimum when you become a parent?
People love to say this, and I understand their sentiment, but any world that implemented this would be a horrible world. Think about the people in power who get to decide the rules, and think of the people who would be excluded. LGBT people would have parenting rights revoked, disabled people, people from unconventional backgrounds. Imagine if the government could look into your past and see stuff like "oh you did drugs when you were in your early 20s? Well now you're 33 and haven't touched them for years, you can't be a parent. Sorry!"
Permissive parenting, on the other hand, is the polar opposite of authoritarian parenting. Permissive parents are incredibly loving and responsive to their kids’ feelings.
However, they tend to avoid setting and enforcing boundaries. One of the most accurate ways of describing the style is that these parents often think of themselves as their children’s friends, rather than guardian figures. They pretty much let their munchkins do whatever they want without wanting to control them in any way. But kids need some sort of structure to thrive.
I think a lot of people want to have babies, and forget they grow into kids and teens and adults!
Lastly, there’s the neglectful (aka uninvolved) parenting style where there are no rules, expectations, or support. The parents, for whatever reasons, simply do not respond to what they require, from basic needs to attention and love. Kids who grow up this way tend to have lots of problems at school, have little self-control, and may get in trouble with the authorities.
Out of all four of these styles, authoritative parenting is the only one that finds a balance between structure and encouragement.
"let them develop their own personalities" "if the kid turns out bad, it's the parents fault" "keep your kids in check" "don't be so strickt" - it's all just extremes against eachother, and all taken out of context. M W's comment to this post is what all these opinions need: an exact example. Those opinions are mostly geared towards a specific scenario in mind, but that is not mentioned.
And only if it works: if kids are told by a teacher how to behave well and the parents tell them otherwise, who do you think they'll most likely listen to? A guy they see a few hours everyday for less than a year, or their beloved parents they take as their life example? Yes, a good teacher can be a great help but it can't replace parents who don't do their job.
Which of the parenting opinions in this list did you agree with the most? What parenting style and philosophy do you apply at home, dear Pandas? What advice would you give new parents who are struggling to juggle work, childcare, chores, and rest? We’d love to hear your thoughts, so if you have a moment, scroll down to the comment section to share them.
Gods yes. Dont excuse their bad behaviors because you think they can do no wrong. Let them experience consequences. Stand with them, hold their hand, but make them face the ramifications of their actions. Excusing them only creates a$$holes and monsters who think they can get away with anything.
I've heard about a father who reacted to his son assaulting a girl with "Nice, I was getting afraid he's gay". Some nice priorities, really...
Parents are not servants or slaves to their children though. People should appreciate what they have. Both parents and children. And no, it's not my responsibiltiy to be there for them no matter what. It is my responsibility to perpare them for adult life, to make them independent (good) human beings. It is my responsibility to make sure they can live happily ever after without me.
It’s makes me so sad and angry seeing babies holding a phone when out and about. Literal babies! Disgusting. And then there’s the toddlers. No wonder IQ points have dropped for the first time in over 70 years after ongoing growth. 22 points! That’s massive!
YES. This is the correct response to the "ChiLdReN aRE NoT yOUr FriEnDs" argument.
Not always. Sometimes parents try to connect with their kids and that kid just goes off the rails.
Note: this post originally had 87 images. It’s been shortened to the top 35 images based on user votes.
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I've got one that I don't think was on the list. If you do everything for your children their whole lives, and never let them make decisions or solve their own problems (age appropriate, of course), you are a child abuser. Your job as a parent is to help them develop into confident competent adults, not keep them dependent on you their whole lives, or suddenly expect them to fend for themselves when they become an adult after not giving them the tools to do so.
Most of these are just common sense. Don't be an abusive jackass to your kid/kids
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How are these controversial? "I think that spanking does not qualify as corporal punishment" now that's controversial. These are just common sense.
I've got one that I don't think was on the list. If you do everything for your children their whole lives, and never let them make decisions or solve their own problems (age appropriate, of course), you are a child abuser. Your job as a parent is to help them develop into confident competent adults, not keep them dependent on you their whole lives, or suddenly expect them to fend for themselves when they become an adult after not giving them the tools to do so.
Most of these are just common sense. Don't be an abusive jackass to your kid/kids
Load More Replies... How are these controversial? "I think that spanking does not qualify as corporal punishment" now that's controversial. These are just common sense.
