Job search is not an easy task in general especially when you’re straight out of college, as employers expect years of experience or else they send you straight down the road of internships. And finding the most suitable job may as well be a form of art. But who the hell is it out there looking for potential employees and trying out how far the limits be pushed? It’s mind blowing how some companies have outrageous expectations from the future hires while setting up some ridiculous conditions. And really, these ads are out there to remind us that if everything fails at least your sense of humour will still be there out when it will come to facing the most horrendous employers. For its 139k subscribers this Reddit thread, Recruiting Hell, brings the hottest job offers out there - now, whether you’re ready to take up those jobs or not is your choice.
Bored Panda picked a few best worst recruitment fails out there from the popular Reddit community. These 28 emails, ads and job applications show that the hiring process will strip you off your dignity, pay you in experience and make fun of you. Recruiters are there to give you life advice and tell you in general what to do and not, even when it comes to using the bathroom. They’re there to question your experience, sanity and make you doubt their common sense. And although there are lots of profesional people in the industry, but this time brace yourselves for not the kindest ones. This is a list that anyone who has ever looked for a job or offered one can relate to, so you can share with us your recruitment hell stories below!
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When Employer Was Not Supposed To Attach A Message
Your Science Degree Will Be Perfect To Work At Our Restaurant
Looking For 'Cold And Robotic' Person
Maybe I should apply as their grammar with "would of" should be "would have"
Load More Replies..."You pick up on little details others would of missed." Is this deliberate? Because I definitely picked up on that little detail. It should be would've.
Are you a robot? You are a robot, aren't you? C'mon, admit you're a robot. Wot me pushy?
Load More Replies...I'm wondering if the typo/grammatical error in the fourth bullet point was intentional -- people who didn't catch it wouldn't be welcome. I'm also wondering if the fifth bullet point is a shout out to some people on the (autism) spectrum, suggesting that this might be a job where they could shine.
I'm in the spectrum (Asperger's) and TBH I really wish there were more jobs like this one.
Load More Replies...This actually sounds good, especially the part about "being by yourself with little communication over the day". Spent last three years in unbelievably toxic and overall hellish open-plan office and NEVER AGAIN. So place by computer where I would be just by myself sounds like a heaven to me. I would not even mind to have an artificial intelligence as boss, that is something new! (the position really sounds like robot wrote it)
I agree. It sounds like an ideal work description for me, I would really enjoy to have such job.
Load More Replies...This is pretty much how I described myself in my most recent interview. I got the job and love it!
Sounds a bit of a spoof or written by an idiot - plus, (being a grammar nazi), the phrase should be 'You pick up on details (that) others would HAVE missed'
It is a really honest add, that is really good for some specific people, for whom, it is an relief not to pretend to be bubbly and social and craving structure.
Is this the politicly correct term for being on the autism spectrum is encouraged?
As a data entry specialist I can confirm that this job listing is just keeping it real
I picked up on the little detail that "would of" should be "would have"....perhaps I'm suited for this job?
and "others would of missed" if the recruiter has bad grammar......
At least the company is honest about what it's looking for and there are probably people out there who fit the description and would work out well in that position.
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'You pick up on little details others would of missed' - I cannot work out whether that was deliberate or not.
I dont think cold and robotic precise people go to work where people can’t spell ‘would have’ right.
"you enjoy sitting at a computer for hours doing the same thing over and over"
Pick up on little details that others would "have" missed? Like this? Check.
I think what you might want to hire are robots. Sad but I think I have seen one that acts like a dog and can carry stuff. Maybe you might like that piece of metal rather than a living being. Guys this is supposed to be funny but it is rather sad. The movie Wall- E is an on-point prediction of what will happen to earth if we keep polluting it, please I know robots are impresive but let's limit it to cars and electronics for at least a million years, then it will pay off. Thing about this, do you really want your children or grandchildren to live in dumpster, literally? Animals live here too and they, even though they cannot speak, have a voice with things related to earth. I am literally a teenager and I know that we have to stop being ignorant. And that is why I want to be a veterinarian, I want to understand animals and if I cannot change human lives, I will change little ones or big ones find their way through health. Thanks for listening and please do not delete this message.
Where is the "hilarious" ? And who "failed" at what? Everything is totally normal here! They wrote "of" instead of "have" but it can't be the reason, is it?
“...would HAVE missed.” Yeah, I picked up on that “little” detail, so I’d be perfect for the job in that respect. Unfortunately, I could not work for a company with employees so uneducated that this kind of mistake is unnoticed in a help wanted ad’s job description.
I'd say they need this person, since they obviously missed "would of"! I'm pretty sure this one is a joke. Good god, I hope so.
Just a little detail but the "would of missed" aroused the grammar nazi in me. Should I apply for the job ?
"You pick up on little details others would of missed".... Um, like that little grammatical error in this sentence?
Hey, bubbly people in offices are the worst (I mean besides racists, poop shoes, etc)
So, what you're looking for is literally a robot. And not the type with arms and legs and personality or anything like that. You want a car welder.
I wonder if they want the kind of person who would point out their grammatical error in the fourth bullet point, because if they also want sarcasm and a bad attitude, then I'm their man.
this sounds like me, too bad i'm in the states, also i HATE when people use "would of". it's would HAVE.
No Jeffreys Allowed
Just a guess: when you are making a search engine, as for a database, there needs to be a code word which the computer will know means 'zero' or 'nothing there'. It is usually 'null', but some companies have a person with the surname Null, so it has been changed in this case to jeffrey
When Our Company Doesn't Believe In Experience, But Actually, You Should Have It
We Cannot Provide You With Feedback, But We Would Be Keen To Hear Your Feedback
"Bunch of clowns" is the most constructive feedback they should expect.
You Should Be Loyal Just To One Job Opportunity
It's really nice of him to put all the giant red flags out in the open for everyone to see.
We Found Our Match And It's You With Your...
Good Looks Are A Requirement
But My Name Is Matt...
When The Company Makes You Post Good Reviews
12 hour shifts with no breaks but only a 30 minute lunch is illegal. You’re actually entitled to two 30-minute breaks if your shift is that long, iirc.
When You Withdrew Your Job Application But HR Wants To Make Sure It Rejected You
When The Boss Is Rude, But Perhaps You Are Still Interested In The Job
In other words, "I was even ruder to the other candidates so you're the only one who hasn't explicitly vowed never to work here".
When You Put In Your Time And Get 100%, But You Still Get Rejected
Wants someone who gets a perfect score... Makes a mistake in the first sentence
When You Must Have A Job In Order To Apply
The Rejection Of Your Application Was An Error And Still Is
Sorry we rejected you by mistake. Now we do it properly. It's an advanced version of the sibling game, 'stop hitting yourself'
Junior Senior Software Developer Wanted
Senior developer: "Candidates must have at least 2 previous lifetimes experience of..."
But You're Applying For A Digital Marketing Role
I remember being asked a silly question like this at an interview once. It was "If you could be a box of cereal, which brand and why?". My answer was fruit loops because I would be one if I continued the interview. She was dumbfounded when I got up and left.
When One Job Requires A Lot Of Your Time
i just want to point out the IQ requirement. it is pretty rare for someone to have an IQ of over 135. obviously the person who made this want everyone else to be smarter that him.
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When You Get Rejected After 3 Years Of Waiting
Definitely careful considerations! I'd have let it slide by mid-2020 but not them!
You Eat What?
If I only eat what I kill, then I should be allowed to bring a gun, paring knife, and fire starting kit into the office. In case I forget my lunch and BRENDA won’t shut up about her stupid kids again.
Looking For Females Under 30 Years
If You Get Distracted, If You Need More Than Two Short Breaks, If You Call In Sick, This Job Is Not For You
Disagree here.The title claims "if you call in sick", what is written is "if you always call in sick around the weekend" --- pretty different. They mostly give you very good pointers how to ace the job interview (read people's intentions from their statements, that's half the test) / attitude you want. What's written here is far less than what most companies actually demand.
When You're Totally Meeting All Of The Requirements
Your knees tremble when someone foists extra tasks on you. You swoon when asked to do unpaid overtime. You have a secret fetish for boring meetings.
We Reject You, But Why Don't You Give Us A Follow?
We Are Looking Forward To When We Can Hire You, But Not Now
When Your Schedule Is Pretty Tight
I once saw a job advert for a _cleaner_ at a local burger joint in Lahti (southern Finland, where I lived at the time). The advert stated that the person must have "excellent written and spoken Finnish AND English". I mean, it's an absolute must that you can be able to discuss the socioeconomic ramification of gully erosion on mountain pastures in Outer Mongolia with the customers as you de-clog the toilet...
I said this in a comment already, but the best one is still the company that required 10 years of java or something, when the program had only existed for 5 years. There was literally no possible way someone could meet the job requirements.
Why did @afoben's reply get voted down so hard? You can tell from the URL that it's relevant to Lexi's post, as it's about the exact same situation -- an IBM ad requiring 12 years of experience in Kubernetes when Kubernetes itself was only 6 years old.
Load More Replies...Friend got an invitation to interview with requirements: 25-30 y.o, office dress code: jacket and SKIRT, during interview first question on abilities: "do you know how to make a coffee? because our director rather likes when office girls serve him coffee" Position: Sales Manager ...we are still sometimes laughing from this gem :D
These companies are exploiting the fact that there are people out there DESPERATE for job, any job. (I've been there...). No person who had the option to choose where to work would apply for these jobs. Wouldn't it be better to lower their demands and then be pleasantly surprised? (I guess not, they want people that are desperate, so they can treat them badly without them leaving).
Ridiculous requirements, and not to mention the insane interviews! I have unfortunately witnessed discriminatory selection processes when even deciding who gets an interview. People were rejected due to age, having children, complicated foreign name, unstylish social media profile picture... (I objected if course!) And then in the interview itself you need to pretend to be so enthusiastic and have a five year plan for everything. Really we needed someone to copy paste numbers. That's it.
Oh, the language! So it's no longer a "job", it's now a "role"? All the jargon and "bizspeak" is ridiculous. Speak plain, understandable English. These people are representing companies. When did double-talk become the standard for businesses? They all sound fairly moronic to me.
I once saw a job advert for a _cleaner_ at a local burger joint in Lahti (southern Finland, where I lived at the time). The advert stated that the person must have "excellent written and spoken Finnish AND English". I mean, it's an absolute must that you can be able to discuss the socioeconomic ramification of gully erosion on mountain pastures in Outer Mongolia with the customers as you de-clog the toilet...
I said this in a comment already, but the best one is still the company that required 10 years of java or something, when the program had only existed for 5 years. There was literally no possible way someone could meet the job requirements.
Why did @afoben's reply get voted down so hard? You can tell from the URL that it's relevant to Lexi's post, as it's about the exact same situation -- an IBM ad requiring 12 years of experience in Kubernetes when Kubernetes itself was only 6 years old.
Load More Replies...Friend got an invitation to interview with requirements: 25-30 y.o, office dress code: jacket and SKIRT, during interview first question on abilities: "do you know how to make a coffee? because our director rather likes when office girls serve him coffee" Position: Sales Manager ...we are still sometimes laughing from this gem :D
These companies are exploiting the fact that there are people out there DESPERATE for job, any job. (I've been there...). No person who had the option to choose where to work would apply for these jobs. Wouldn't it be better to lower their demands and then be pleasantly surprised? (I guess not, they want people that are desperate, so they can treat them badly without them leaving).
Ridiculous requirements, and not to mention the insane interviews! I have unfortunately witnessed discriminatory selection processes when even deciding who gets an interview. People were rejected due to age, having children, complicated foreign name, unstylish social media profile picture... (I objected if course!) And then in the interview itself you need to pretend to be so enthusiastic and have a five year plan for everything. Really we needed someone to copy paste numbers. That's it.
Oh, the language! So it's no longer a "job", it's now a "role"? All the jargon and "bizspeak" is ridiculous. Speak plain, understandable English. These people are representing companies. When did double-talk become the standard for businesses? They all sound fairly moronic to me.