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50 Of The Funniest Marriage Tweets From The Very Unusual Year Of 2020
As if married life wasn’t hard enough already (separate toothpaste tubes since your partner doesn’t squeeze it right, anyone?), the infamous year 2020 ran it through the ultimate test. No wonder there’s been a 34% rise in sales of divorce agreements between newlyweds in the last five months in the US.
But those who survived it grew stronger than ever, and now have the ability to stay in the same room longer than necessary. Most importantly, though, husbands, wives, and partners, they all contributed to a huge public service. You see, their quarantine experiences served as one-of-a-kind material for hysterically funny marriage tweets along the way.
Just think of it... minimum external leisure activities, no home time off, aka I’m busy at work, and disproportionately more of the all-time favorite quality family time, which will probably never be viewed the same again after the pandemic is over. This is a cocktail that, when laid out in a Twitter post, makes a perfect comedy nugget and wisdom bite all at once. So let’s see what ‘twenty twenty (w)one’ had in it for us to laugh at.
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To find out more about the toll the pandemic-induced chaos has had on our marriage lives, Bored Panda reached out to Dr. Lise Deguire, a clinical psychologist and author of “Flashback Girl: Lessons on Resilience From a Burn Survivor.”
Lise told us that because of the quarantine, our daily routines changed beyond recognition. “Most of us have stayed home full-time for many months. Usually, we get our social needs met by lots of people and not just our spouse. Normally, married people are able to go out and connect with friends, family, and coworkers.”
The pandemic has put an end to that, which means that “we have had to rely on our spouses for almost all of our companionship needs.” Lise further explained that for some couples, particularly the ones who were already unhappy, “this time has been extremely tiring.”
On the other hand, some good came out of the cursed year. Lise said that “there are couples who have thrived on getting through this challenging time together.” “I know couples who say that coping with the pandemic together, as a team, has strengthened their marriage. Sometimes adversity does have an upside,” she concluded.
Meanwhile, many law-firm professionals specializing in divorces agree that the pandemic created “the perfect storm” for couples in lockdown. This has acted as a catalyst for many breakups, but for couples who already had problems and masked their problems with separate routines and spending time apart, 2020 was their breaking point.
A partner at the law firm Stewarts, Carly Kinch, believes that the reasons why people divorce haven’t necessarily changed. “You've always had the underlying current of ‘I'm unhappy with this or that at home.’ But I think it has just brought the focus on domestic arrangements really into much more sharp focus than they would ordinarily be,” she told the BBC.
But what’s been indeed a change was the significant increase in women who are initiating divorces. Turns out, 76% of new cases came from female clients, which makes it 16% higher when compared to the same time a year ago. Carly believes it may have to do with a “disproportionate share of housework and childcare that falls on females” in heterosexual households.
Carly described the newly set household dynamics of 2020 that were very different from what many partners expected when the lockdowns started: “‘Oh, isn't this going to be lovely! We're going to spend lots of quality time together. And my partner, who's normally in the city or commuting—they'll be around and they'll help more. And I think the reality for many has been a far cry from that.”
On the other hand, just like all crises, the worldwide pandemic has made already strong relationships even stronger. Many partners benefited from more quality time spent together, many initiated new hobbies and found common things to engage in together.
If the year 2020 has taught us something, it must be an appreciation of our closest ones and having an opportunity to start 2021 together. Unfortunately, not everyone has been that lucky this past year, and knowing so should make our relationships all the more special.
#12
chi-wei shen 5 years ago
You secretly have to close all jars with all your strength to become essential again.
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Kari Panda 5 years ago
Honestly, that is a good answer though. Our SO is someone we spend a large part of our daily life with. You don’t want to have to pretend in front of them. Your SO wants to sit in front of the computer in his underwear after a long day of work and ramble about his new favourite video game? That’s them relaxing and feeling at ease with you.
#19
One Trick Porpoise 5 years ago
Among the "best of" in my household - I slap a pan on the stove (random handle direction), slap some bacon in it, and then I learned that I'm doing it utterly wrong - handle must point east, definitely NOT north.
#24
chi-wei shen 5 years ago
I once ate my wife's fries and she told me this was a formal declaration of war.
#30
Laura Stenger 5 years ago
Have told mine to get one from under the tree for his bday lots. Bday is on 21 dec
#40
Berry Budgie 5 years ago
I spend a full minute throwing all the decorative pillows off my bed every night😂
#41
Martha Meyer 5 years ago
Porn is just completely unrealistic on all levels to the detriment of teenagers who end up thinking violence against women is a normal part of sex.
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Kristof De Smet 5 years ago
I've got a wife and three daughters, I get it. I also have a cat who likes to play with hair ties.
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Levi Baker 5 years ago
Or like when you are eating with your grandparents and they ask how school is going but you can't answer cuz your mouth is full of lasagna
#57
Boopie Dew 5 years ago (edited)
At 21 yrs, your're glad you have a dog that will get up so you don't have to.
#60
Boopie Dew 5 years ago
Sometimes, someone says something that makes me feel so bad for my husband. This is it. Because its true, so true.
#66
Boopie Dew 5 years ago
Yes this is a test of the biggest magnitude. Do not fail, you will never hear the end of it.
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#73
Kari Panda 5 years ago
Never leave a man hints. I left a tab open on his tablet with an amazon item I wanted. My birthday was coming up and he was trying to find a gift for me. The item was a DVD collection of an old tv show he KNOWS I love. So well... He closed the tab, I opened it again the next day, and that went back and forth three of four times. I didn‘t feel like he was getting my intention and bluntly told him just to be on the safe side. His reaction was literally, "Ah, I had started wondering why that tab was always open." So yes, always be abundantly clear.
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Sleazy Weaver 5 years ago
When my voice dropped, my mom constantly got pissed off at me from speaking in a "rude tone". Getting mad at people for things they can control is ridiculous.
#83
Dorothy Parker 5 years ago
That is so creepy. My kid's baby teeth are in the glass cabinet in the bathroom. So are the dog's.
#89
Jennifer Johnson 5 years ago
my husband manages to sneeze so loud it often scares me and makes me scream and jump. At Walmart recently he sneezed and a woman a few aisles away screamed that time.
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DDmaybeandor 5 years ago
Yup, we've slept with separate blankets for years and years. I've got a habit of rolling up into a cocoon, so it was necessary.
#96
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Isabel Care 5 years ago
Dad gave mum a Dolly Duck novelty butter dish for Christmas. She nearly used the kitchen knife he got her last year. Instead, she cleaned behind the cooker. Have you seen a 5ft3 woman throw a stove across a kitchen?
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Boopie Dew 5 years ago
No, tweezers and a mirror I beg of you. Some seals should never be broken.
#108
Boopie Dew 5 years ago
My husband and I would argue so hard trying to rush anywhere with the kids. So to save the marriage he takes the kids and I stay home in peace and quiet. 😆
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Sleazy Weaver 5 years ago
Some online phrases are cringy as hell when used in the real world whether you understand the context or not.
#135
Sleazy Weaver 5 years ago
I'm intolerant to lactose & gluten but even I eat more Doritos than that (& face the repercussions)!
#138
#144
WilvanderHeijden 5 years ago
Kicking the tires solved car problems for me . Don't think you should use that method to solve marital problems.
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What do you think ?
Kari Panda 5 years ago
I just kissed my husband goodbye as he went to work. He wouldn’t stop tickling me, so I bit him in the cheek. I‘d say marriage is going great :)
Kari Panda 5 years ago
I just kissed my husband goodbye as he went to work. He wouldn’t stop tickling me, so I bit him in the cheek. I‘d say marriage is going great :)
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