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Article created by: Gabija Saveiskyte
For many individuals, friends are some of the most important people in their lives; not to mention best friends. But unfortunately, despite often being referred to as “best friends forever”, they might not stick around this long, and there can be many reasons why.
One redditor recently started a discussion about such reasons, after they turned to the ‘Ask Reddit’ community asking why other users and their best friends had a falling out. Quite a few netizens went down memory lane—and not a fun one, I might add—and shared the stories of what turned their BFF into a stranger. Scroll down to find their accounts on the list below and feel free to share your story in the comments, if you, too, have lost a friend you thought was going to be by your side forever.
On the list below, you will also find Bored Panda’s interviews with evolutionary psychologist and expert in cooperation, altruism, and friendship, Dr. Patrick Barclay, and retired associate professor, researching positive and negative components of friendship, Morton J. Mendelson, who were kind enough to answer a few of our questions.
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#1
Her boyfriend told her he didn’t trust me so she cut me off. I just laughed and moved on, three weeks later she caught him cheating. Our friendship never recovered.
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#2
He transitioned to a she, which I had no problem with. But then she made that her entire personality, constantly playing the victim, no matter the situation.
Got shorted at Chipotle? They must hate trans people.
Got cut off in traffic? They must hate trans people.
And on and on and on and on…. It was exhausting. But the straw that broke the camels back, was when we were having a discussion about this whole thing. I told her that I was on her side and always had her back regardless. And she said “That’s not enough.”
And I was out. 20 years of friendship, out the window in 3 words.
#3
She made out that her dad was missing (he wasn't) and said to me infront of our friends, "no offence, at least you know where your dad is."
Sounds normal, but my dad passed away a month before this. She was seriously messed up and I'm glad I'm no longer friends with that psycho.
#4
I was doing all the work. Initiating conversations, making the plans, driving, paying (they make almost no money, and I was making good money), keeping the friendship going...
I stopped instigating plans. They never contacted me. I knew right then that this was truly a one-sided friendship.
#5
He took me to a party at the house of his girlfriend’s friends. I was a POS and stole from the host, I was caught weeks later. Paid back what I stole to avoid charges being pressed and the friendship was rightfully over.
That was 20 years ago and it still bothers me often. I’m sorry Zach!
#6
He decided to lie about having money to fly out to be my best man and instead went on vacation. I had no best man for my wedding. 25 years, gone.
#7
My best friend RSVPed for a table of six for my wedding, but none of them showed up. I never got a text, call, gift, or any kind of excuse. Based on social media pictures, I found out later on that they had a picnic and just didn't feel like doing a wedding. That was painful because even a lie apology would have at least suggested some level of apathy.
#8
My best friend over 20 years tried to frame his wife for felony assault and I knew he was lying because I was there on those days. He wanted to get out of paying alimony, dividing assets, and sharing custody. I told him not to do this, and end his marriage with a proper divorce over but he wouldn’t listen.
I testified against him because I couldn’t let this happen to an innocent person.
I feel sad it came to this, and I feel I betrayed him. Had he taken the high road I’d have been there for him 100%.
Binky Melnik 6 months ago
Doing the right thing isn’t “betrayal.” Who needs an аsshole for a friend?
#9
Idk man. He was my best friend, good guy. We did everything together for about 15 years. We were in bands, trained jujitsu, movies, everything.
One day about 8 years ago, just stopped responding to texts or calls. I send a text once or twice a year to let him know I miss him and I want to know what happened. Haven’t heard from him in 8 years. He’s married now with a kid and taking over his father’s business. I wish him nothing but success, health and happiness.
I just want to know what happened but here we are.
#11
Refused to take a side when it counted. It was especially hurtful considering the situation I was in was caused by the consequences of me sticking my neck out for her.
#12
It was more of a 'we stopped talking to each other for good' than a proper falling out, but she was the sort of person who would be close friends with you one moment, but the minute she got into a relationship, that became her entire world and she would stop talking to you for weeks on end. The only times I used to hear from her was when she decided she needed a break from her boyfriend and figured I'd always be around to hangout with her.
My final straw was going on a shopping trip with her and she was close to straight up leaving me at a shop with no transport in place because she was in a rush to get back to her boyfriend. She had driven us out to this place and was prepared to leave me there which would have cost me a lot of money to get back home.
#13
He had a kid. I literally never heard from him again after he texted me that his daughter had been born. Every few months or so I’d reach out and ask how everyone was doing. I quit after about a year.
We moved to different cities after graduating college. He’d always been a super busy, distracted guy with a lot going on so I understood at the beginning. I’m not a needy guy or a needy friend. Having a kid is especially hard work and should be his number one priority…but to never hear from the guy again, ever? My best friend? That sucked. That sucked bad.
#14
She got too drunk and randomly started being really nasty toward me. Said some very very hurtful things that a “best friend” would never say unless they thought those things to be true the whole time we were friends. She crossed a line and I can’t find it in me to forgive her.
#15
We went from best friends to roommates, and we had terrible issues with communication until resentment built up so much that we had an extreme blowup over the phone.
About a year later, I was feeling a lot of regret about it, so without my knowledge my girlfriend actually reached out to him to see if he would be willing to talk to me. He seemed amenable to it, but after I apologized for my end of it, he took the opportunity to unload on me even more. I honestly felt a weight lifted off my shoulders and didn’t feel anymore regret. We were meant to part ways and that was that.
#16
He chased me around with a hammer and threatened to [unalive] me after asking him to turn his instrument down because it was louder than my drum kit and despite wearing musicians earplugs/monitors I was going deaf.
#17
Her ten year old son died of sepsis.
a few years later, I survived sepsis, because I knew the signs.
but because I survived, our friendship failed. twenty years.
#18
Let’s just say when you got through a health scare like cancer, you quickly figure out who your good friends are, despite being beside them through thick and thin over many years. Good riddance!
#19
Invited him to an NFL game, ticket price was $100.00 or so, I didn’t ask for reimbursement or did he offer it, just wanted him to have a good time. Fast forward two weeks later, I call him up on a Friday evening seeing what he’s up to, want to do something. He’s excited I called because him and other friends, not my friends, had an extra ticket to a cover band, ask if I wanted to go. I met up near the venue, one of his friends became ill and so I ended up driving him home, over 20 miles round trip. Got back to the venue,went to the show, good time. Two days later he was over to watch football, as he was leaving asked if I had the $8.00 for the ticket, I reluctantly gave it to him, he could tell I was upset. He called me about 20 minutes later asking why I was upset, I told him first I didn’t ask for reimbursement to the NFL game and most importantly he wanted $8.00 for a ticket that they would have not used, had to eat , if I didn’t call. Also I reminded him of driving his ill friend home without any offer of reimbursement. His response, “oh.”.
#23
She was constantly tracking my location and began treating me like she was my toxic boyfriend. wouldn’t let me get a partner, make new friends, it was rough for a long time. also a bit verbally abusive.
#24
I "left town and didn't even tell anyone." I messaged them all for months and even had a going away party that no one showed up to. Looking back they were not very good friends.
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