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“Forget Your Bad Friends”: 50 Examples Of Adult Advice People Wish They’d Heard Earlier
“Experience is the best teacher,” or so the old cliche goes, but, realistically, most of us would prefer to be forewarned about the realities of life. From how to spot a bad friend to the best ways to internalize personal boundaries, it can be pretty helpful to learn from others first.
Someone asked “What's a piece of adult advice you wish you'd known sooner?” and netizens shared the things they learned perhaps a bit too late. So get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites and be sure to add your own ideas and experiences in the comments section below.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Be careful of who you vent to at work. Just because they listen or show some empathy, it doesn't mean that they're your friend or have your best interests at heart.
Michael Largey 1 year ago
Someone at work may be your friend, but remember that's not why they show up there.
RELATED:
#2
If you're in the toilet in your dream, don't use it.
I REPEAT DON'T USE IT.
#3
Working harder than everyone else only means the boss will load you down with even more work.
#4
HR ain't yer friend :'(.
#6
Don’t let stuff pile up. Bills, stuff on your to do list, cleaning, low tire, engine light on, etc. It sounds basic but getting stuff done as soon as it comes up (as soon as possible) lowers stress and makes life way easier. Stuff doesn’t just go away, and getting it done quickly removes piles of stuff later.
DutchPanda 1 year ago
This is so very true. But most of this sounds and feels nearly impossible when you have ADHD and the small task at hand weighs like a million tons and it looks like a mountain. At least, for me that is.
Panda McPandaface 1 year ago
I know this to be true, but it involves so much.... Other people.
Kikikaboom 1 year ago
Lol, having ADHD means stuff can and WILL pile up for me, so I get what I can done, and do my best not to feel guilty about what I don't get done. My bills get paid, my cat and I get fed (cat won't let me forget though, lol) the very important stuff gets done, and everything else is a hit or miss. Life is too short to worry about some clutter here and there.
Manana Man 1 year ago
Sometimes stuff goes away. I learned that when I arrive at work I should read the emails in reverse order. Otherwise you'll start reacting to some issue only to find out from a later email that someone else already dealt with it.
Beak Hookage 1 year ago
I have a tendency to just keep putting things off until they pile up and I get overwhelmed and have a complete meltdown. So now my policy is: even if I've got six months to get this thing out of the way, I'm not going to wait. I'm going to get it done immediately. This actually led to me becoming very efficient and good at prioritising; at work people would be surprised and pleased when I'd be given a task and immediately knuckle down and get it finished ASAP. (I also have a freakishly long attention span).
Adrienne L Andrews 1 year ago
If you live in a state where they salt the roads in winter, regular car washes will save your undercarriage.
matt adore 1 year ago
I always think if a task takes 1 minute then just do it as it's thought of. That has evolved to 5 min. and now 1/2 hour... It's really not that long and you get to feel like you got sh!t done. There is still an odd satisfaction procrastinating though.
Mary Green 1 year ago
This! If I look at the clock before and after, I'm often astonished at how little time the dreaded chore actually took.
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Mary Green 1 year ago
I tell myself "tomorrow me will thank me if I do this now." And the next day when I see a chore done, like clean dishes, an empty laundry basket, or a mowed lawn, I do indeed thank yesterday me. I've learned that it takes more time and energy to procrastinate than it does just to do the d*MN chore.
Colin Russell-Conway 1 year ago
Great advice. But it's not always possible as life has other plans. Don't sweat the small stuff and pick your battles might be more fitting here. But do put time aside to get your car sorted! If it breaks down you can't get to work and you don't get paid which means you can afford to get it fixed in the first place.
kansasmagic 1 year ago
Ok, but what if your job demands "flexible scheduling" and your work schedule changes weekly? Or those things you need to do are only available "during regular work hours" and you can't take time off to go to the dentist or whatever?
#7
Learn to live alone.
marianne eliza 1 year ago (edited)
This! When I finally lived alone, and had no one else to cover my tuchus if I was late on rent or other bills, I underwent a complete change. Only 1 credit card, no other loans. Now my (64f) credit score is 810, I have bought, refurbished and sold 3 houses on my own, acting as general contractor each time. Learn to rely on yourself. You may not need it, but you just might.
#8
Spend more time with your parents and grandparents. It's easy to overlook how quickly they're growing older while we're busy with our own lives. One day, their absence will hit harder than you can imagine. Cherish the moments you have with them now, before it's too late.
#9
A piece of adult advice I wish I'd known sooner is that it's okay to say "no" without feeling guilty. Setting boundaries is crucial for maintaining your mental and emotional well-being, and it's not selfish to prioritize your needs. Learning that you don't have to explain or justify your reasons for declining something can be incredibly freeing and helps you focus on what truly matters to you.
#10
Someone else’s greater achievements doesn’t take away from your progress. It’s you vs you.
Child of the Stars 1 year ago
The only person I need to be better than is who I was yesterday.
#11
You're gonna be disliked by people. That's their problem, not yours. You can only take responsibility for the mistakes you actually make not the mistakes others think you have.
Michael Largey 1 year ago
"So you've got enemies. Good. That means you've stood up for something sometime in your life." - Winston Churchill
#13
You don't have to drink to have fun.
#14
Confidence beats ability in most jobs.
Most friendships are situational.
What people present on social media isn't usually who they are.
#15
It’s ok to not have an opinion on something or to say nothing sometimes.
Michael Largey 1 year ago
Not everything that pops into your head has to pop out of your mouth.
#18
Practice talking to people and being with people. Social skills can be learnt like any other skill! It just takes patience, and practice.
General Anaesthesia 1 year ago
And everybody can be a doctor, it "just" takes patients and practice. No, this is far too simplified, the word "just" tells us that. Social skills, functioning with others, can be an act, can cost a lot of energy that needs to be replenished at some time, even after "patience and practice". Don't let someone promote themselves as the norm.
#19
Self Respect is important.
#20
Your job is just one part of your life. Don’t let it consume all your identity or dictate your self-worth.
DennyS (denzoren) 1 year ago
Yes! I learnt this the hard way but now I keep it as what it is, a job to pay the bills.
#21
Don't stay because they say they'll change. Leave because you value yourself.
#22
It’s better to be completely alone and find good friends/romantic partner than keeping the toxic ones just because you love them so much. Everyone is toxic to a degree and has something to work on. Doesn’t give people an excuse to treat you crummy. Don’t feel like your “giving up” or “abandoning” someone because they are treating you poorly and you decide to end the friendship/relationship.
#23
Not everything deserves an immediate answer. Take your time and contemplate the pros and cons of your situation before responding.
Beak Hookage 1 year ago
If someone won't let you go away and think about it first, they're probably trying to pull something. Doubly so if they're trying to sell you something.
#24
Not everyone who smiles at you has your best interests at heart.
#25
Don't base your success off of others lives online or in real life. Just don't.
Beak Hookage 1 year ago
Just today I got a reminder of just how easy it is to sound more impressive than you actually are. Lost your job? Nah, you just decided it was "time to explore new horizons". Couldn't find another one so you signed up for a community college course for a far less skilled position than your old one? Nah, you're "studying at the moment".
#26
There’s a price to pay for every choice we make.
#27
It’s okay to leave the situation (relationship, friendship, job) that isn’t working for you.
Also, always have glue and duct tape at home. You never know when you’re gonna need it.
#28
Your parents are not always right.
notlikeyou1971 1 year ago
Sometimes your parents are the prime example of what NOT to do in life.
#29
Do that thing you really don't want to do but know that you absolutely should do. And do it, like, *now*. I can't remember a single occasion where I regret taking the initiative and heading off some incoming problem but I've lost track of the number of times I've regretted leaving some issue to resolve itself. I'll save you the suspense: they never do. Just deal with that s**t whilst you still have the home advantage, and prosper.
#31
Cherish your good friends, forget your bad friends.
#32
Take care of your teeth. Floss daily and get cleanings twice a year.
Auntriarch 1 year ago
Do the first two especially if you can't afford the third. And there's always bicarb
#33
Don't put it down, put it away.
Beak Hookage 1 year ago
One I definitely need to pay attention to. Once again I introduced my "just do it right now" policy. Notice a cup has been sitting on the table for some time now? Put it away. Finished drawing for today? Put the pencils and erasers back in the tin. As someone who's got issues with untidiness and forgetfulness, it's something I'm still working on. But I'm definitely making progress.
#34
Don't compare your insides to others' outsides. Appearances aren't everything.
#35
Take care of your teeth. And go to a dentist ones a half a year.
#36
What others think of you is none of your business.
Biggus Dickus 1 year ago
This is such a valuable outlook on life when taken seriously. I grew up in a harsh environment where "disrespect" was confronted regularly with extreme aggression which led to serious consequences like death and/or jail time.. which ruins lives on both sides of the situation. Then I had an epiphany, that led me to this exact conclusion. If you don't like me for whatever reason, that's completely YOUR business and really shouldn't affect anything I do personally. I'm already in my 40's, still surviving, still existing and I never knew you felt that way and it never affected my life at all, so now that you made your feelings known, what changed about my life just now when learning this new information??
#38
Everyone's faking it. Yes, even that super-confident, capable person you know from work/school/your friendship circle. So don't feel scared if you are too.
The more you do the things you're scared of the more naturally they'll eventually come to you. That's how anyone and everyone builds competence in anything. So don't make excuses for yourself. Just get on with it.
Be OK with being bad at things. Everyone's bad at the start. The real measure of competence is how willing you are to stick things out and slowly improve over time. Obviously, this requires a measure of common sense - if you really hate something, don't force the issue. But the likelihood is you're going to suck at your new hobby, profession, sport, exercise, musical instrument, language, or whatever endeavor you're hoping to pursue. And that's more than just 'OK', it's natural.
#39
Looking good ( well maintained) and dressing properly really counts, unfortunately our society treats us differently by our looks.
Panda McPandaface 1 year ago (edited)
"It's better to feel good than to look good." - Panda McPandaface.
#40
“Two things that you don’t pay attention to until you get older, your health and your wealth”.
"Disembodied voice" 1 year ago
My health has always sucked, I don't want to pay attention to it (still do anyway).
#41
It's perfectly fine to have a dominant personality as a woman and if people find you intimidating (when you didn't intend for that to happen) that is not a me-problem but a they-problem.
keyboardtek 1 year ago
But everyone needs to be aware of the effect they have on people. No reason to act like a jerk just because one is assertive.
#42
Maintaining friendships in your 30+ is a part time job and should be treated as such.
#43
Take more risks while young, don't settle for a job you hate and do it only for the money. Try to find your passion early on, so you can enjoy life longer !
#44
You are not Special just like everyone else. So Don't be an A-hole.
kansasmagic 1 year ago
You can be special and not be an a-hole. I will say that most a-holes I have met are pretty generic. Not special at all.
#45
The acceptance of things that you couldn't change. (both physically and mentally).
Michael Largey 1 year ago
No, don't accept things that you can't change. But accept that you can't change them.
#46
When you are doing something bold, different, creative or something the world hasn’t seen, and you’re deeply unsure but still want to put it out there - do it anyway - then you are invincible. I turn 35 in two days and learnt this barely a week ago (the hard way with too much self-critique, anxiety and chaos, and lost a lot of time). Don’t wait this long. Hope this helps someone.
Panda McPandaface 1 year ago
Oh I wish that made a person invincible. It's admirable, but it really doesn't.
#47
Working hard can make you more money. But finding a way to do less work and make even more money should be your true goal.
#48
Always wear protection.
#50
Learn to manage stress and avoid burnout.
kansasmagic 1 year ago
Oh, ok! If only someone had advised me to avoid depression too, I'd be great!
#52
People will come & go. Always put your education first!!!
#54
Nobody cares about you. why? because people only care about themeselves.
#55
Follow your joy.
#56
F**k your dreams.
Make money.
Enjoy your dreams later as hobbies.
But make money now. That's the only thing that matters.
Money doesn't buy happiness. It buys all the things that'll make you happy.
Panda McPandaface 1 year ago
No. Just NO. I am rashly going to assume a US citizen posted this.
What do you think ?
Russell Rieckenberg 1 year ago (edited)
Having just finished jury duty I have two pieces of advice: 1) If you are charged with a felony, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT represent yourself in court. Use a lawyer. 2) When the police say you are under arrest and put the handcuffs on. STOP TALKING!!!
D. Pitbull 1 year ago
What's that saying again... about a lawyer and a fool for a client?
Load More Replies...
Justin Tyme 1 year ago
If you are going to use the same tissue to clean your eyeglasses and blow your nose, you should clean your glasses first.
Jumping Jellyfishes 1 year ago (edited)
NEVER put anything on top of your car when you're trying to unlock/open the door. You'll forget it until you hear the sound of it tumbling down the back of your car once you hit a decent speed. Could be just a cup of coffee, or a collection of music CDs
Marnie 1 year ago
My brother (a loving, dedicated father) put his son in his car seat on the roof of his car and got distracted by his other son, then almost drove away. This was 30 years ago, so I don't remember what stopped him. The thought of what could have happened and having made such a terrible mistake pained him the rest of his life.
Load More Replies...
Igor914624 1 year ago
Listen to what Martin Luther King said and judge people by the content of their character, not the color of their skin. Evil and good will eventually show themselves to you in their actions and words. Pay attention. Do your research and find the absolute truth about people. And be ready to change your opinion or belief based on your own research.
kansasmagic 1 year ago
This kind of "advice" is too generic and vague to be useful. Might as well just tell people to "be happy and successful". Of course! Why didn't I think of that?
Roberta Surprenant 1 year ago (edited)
Need a timer when putting champagne bottle in freezer also.
Laomeni 1 year ago (edited)
Always listen to your gut. There's a reason a "nice" person still makes you uncomfortable. Don't let other's opinions affect your instincts. We people don't see/treat everyone with the same way. Our gut feeling is much smarter that us and capable picking up vibes that our brain misses. Logic can be wrong. Gut feeling never.
LovePsychos 1 year ago
Even if you know someone for years and spend many hours with them, you really know them when you live together. It doesn't matter if they are your friends or partners, you know them better when you see them at their worst than when they are always in a good mood. Also people change... Not always to the best...
Tim Douglass 1 year ago
Avoid debt as much as possible. Cars and houses are notable exceptions. Pay any small debt as quickly as you can. Being financially solvent makes many other things in life easier. Might add that having credit available can be a literal or virtual lifesaver. I got a credit card early, managed it carefully, and when I was fairly newly married I had the engine fail on our vehicle a couple days away from home. I had the credit to pay for the repairs and get home. Without it I'm not sure what I would have done. A longer delay trying to work something out likely would have cost both of us our jobs. Yes, it sucks paying the interest on it, but unless you are in a financial position where you can just drop a month's pay to fix something you need that credit.
Russell Rieckenberg 1 year ago (edited)
Having just finished jury duty I have two pieces of advice: 1) If you are charged with a felony, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT represent yourself in court. Use a lawyer. 2) When the police say you are under arrest and put the handcuffs on. STOP TALKING!!!
D. Pitbull 1 year ago
What's that saying again... about a lawyer and a fool for a client?
Load More Replies... Justin Tyme 1 year ago
If you are going to use the same tissue to clean your eyeglasses and blow your nose, you should clean your glasses first.
Jumping Jellyfishes 1 year ago (edited)
NEVER put anything on top of your car when you're trying to unlock/open the door. You'll forget it until you hear the sound of it tumbling down the back of your car once you hit a decent speed. Could be just a cup of coffee, or a collection of music CDs
Marnie 1 year ago
My brother (a loving, dedicated father) put his son in his car seat on the roof of his car and got distracted by his other son, then almost drove away. This was 30 years ago, so I don't remember what stopped him. The thought of what could have happened and having made such a terrible mistake pained him the rest of his life.
Load More Replies... Igor914624 1 year ago
Listen to what Martin Luther King said and judge people by the content of their character, not the color of their skin. Evil and good will eventually show themselves to you in their actions and words. Pay attention. Do your research and find the absolute truth about people. And be ready to change your opinion or belief based on your own research.
kansasmagic 1 year ago
This kind of "advice" is too generic and vague to be useful. Might as well just tell people to "be happy and successful". Of course! Why didn't I think of that?
Roberta Surprenant 1 year ago (edited)
Need a timer when putting champagne bottle in freezer also.
Laomeni 1 year ago (edited)
Always listen to your gut. There's a reason a "nice" person still makes you uncomfortable. Don't let other's opinions affect your instincts. We people don't see/treat everyone with the same way. Our gut feeling is much smarter that us and capable picking up vibes that our brain misses. Logic can be wrong. Gut feeling never.
LovePsychos 1 year ago
Even if you know someone for years and spend many hours with them, you really know them when you live together. It doesn't matter if they are your friends or partners, you know them better when you see them at their worst than when they are always in a good mood. Also people change... Not always to the best...
Tim Douglass 1 year ago
Avoid debt as much as possible. Cars and houses are notable exceptions. Pay any small debt as quickly as you can. Being financially solvent makes many other things in life easier. Might add that having credit available can be a literal or virtual lifesaver. I got a credit card early, managed it carefully, and when I was fairly newly married I had the engine fail on our vehicle a couple days away from home. I had the credit to pay for the repairs and get home. Without it I'm not sure what I would have done. A longer delay trying to work something out likely would have cost both of us our jobs. Yes, it sucks paying the interest on it, but unless you are in a financial position where you can just drop a month's pay to fix something you need that credit.
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