50 People Reveal The Harsh Truths That Were The Adult Version Of Being Told Santa Isn’t Real
Life is full of disappointments, both large and small. That doesn’t mean that life itself is all misery—quite the opposite. But it’s important to recognize that pain, failure, and dashed expectations are unavoidable parts of being a human being. Learning how to deal with them becomes a necessity.
Reddit user u/Just_Surround_2108 recently went viral after urging the r/AskReddit community to share the biggest things they were disappointed by when they grew up. Similar to how a child might feel when they learn that Santa Claus is not real. You’ll find their honest opinions, touching on everything from work to relationships and beyond, as you scroll down.
Oh, and just for the record—we fully believe that Santa is real. Anyone who tells you otherwise is probably working for the Grinch.
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Being a hard worker and good at your job doesn't necessarily mean that you'll be rewarded for it.
Finding out that in the US it’s not really democrat vs republican, it’s the rich elites versus the rest of us.
Republicans are the foot soldiers of the rich elite. Until they themselves learn that the enemy is the rich elite and not minorities, they will act against the best interests of the 99%.
If you're intelligent, you have to be quiet because of people who are stupid.
That's the precise reason that stupidity is running rampant right now. Those who know better sit idly by and allow ignorance and idiocy to be perpetuated.
The expectations that we have for life can massively affect us. For instance, someone who’s naive and happy-go-lucky might think that everything will fall into place and things will just work out somehow. When they fail at something or realize that the world doesn’t work the way they imagined it should, they might have their entire perspective shattered. They’ll have trouble coming to terms with this new reality and might feel frustrated at themselves for having been so wrong.
On the flip side, someone who’s overly pessimistic or cynical might lose out on genuinely good opportunities because they don’t think much of anything is worth the effort. For them, a lack of justice and fairness is the status quo. But this makes them blind to the positive aspects of life, as well as the ability to fight for change that matters, whether at work or in society as a whole.
When both your parents die. I am in my mid 50’s and had my mom pass on Mother’s Day ‘22. My Dad then was living with us from then, and eventually reached in-home hospice status with a sudden stage IV cancer diagnosis. He died in January of this year, and then I got laid off from my tech job and was unemployed for 10 months. Nothing takes the wonderment and positive outlook from the world than having to empty out your childhood home solo and throw everything you grew up with into a big dumpster and are left to wonder what our lives really mean.
So, managing your expectations becomes key to managing your disappointments. You don’t want to hype yourself up, nor do you want to dismiss any positivity either. Through experience, we gain wisdom and slowly start to get a better grasp of how everything works. The main point here is that we accept this reality, instead of wishing that things were a drastically different way.
It’s one thing to strive for positive change on a local or even global level. It’s another thing entirely to wish for things to be different without taking any action. In the former case, you’re doing what you can to improve your situation and that of others. It might be hard. You might have to adapt your approach and deal with unexpected roadblocks, but you are putting in the effort to create something better.
In the latter case, however, you might feel frustrated and disempowered because there is such a huge gap between reality and your idealized vision of what the world should be like. ‘Perfect’ social justice or completely fair workplaces might not be possible… but things can be better and fairer. The key here is to change what you can, even if the end result won’t be as good as you’d like it to be.
Finding out the truth about Mother Teresa
A short version, there's much more, but Mother Teresa allowed her patients to suffer pain and discomfort so they would be "closer to God" and also denied a lot of medical treatment. She herself would fly to California (IIRC) for treatment from world class doctors if she was unwell.
HR is NOT on your side.
Human resources, like natural resources, are there to be exploited in corporate processes and the waste products disposed of as cheaply as possible.
‘Psych Central’ suggests that people learn to let go of the negative emotions they feel after their expectations aren’t met. “Letting go doesn’t mean that you should ignore your emotions. Instead, it means you should acknowledge your feelings and let go as you work to overcome what happened.”
It also helps to shift your perspective and look at the bigger picture. You might have been thoroughly disappointed by something that’s happened to you, but there are plenty of other things to be grateful for. Things might be tough at work, but you might still be able to afford a roof over your head, be incredibly healthy, or have a very strong and supportive social circle. Bearing the worst that life throws at you becomes bearable when you take the time to appreciate all the good things that have happened to you.
Finding out that someone you have looked up to and admired your entire life is actually a horrible person.
I don't mind the odd affair here and there that you find out about later. These days it seems as if that's all that they did, what the heck (I know this devastates the partner involved, but at least they have limited their damage). What upsets me is when you find out they were actually a fascist (i.e., Henry Ford) or stole or diverted lost of money to themselves (many politicians) or used their money to screw their employees (the owners of most large businesses and corporations) or turned out to be people who lived entirely differently than they appeared to the public (Mother Teresa, Gandhi, etc.). I think that I am as mad at myself for not having done the research to find out the person I previously admired was such a bad person.
Bullies don't always get their comeuppance. In fact, sometimes they achieve great things. Even the presidency.
Finding out that "reaching retirement" is about hitting a financial number and not reaching an age.
Learning that two people can love each other more than anything in this world and still not be a good fit for a long term relationship.
True and pure Love isn’t always enough
Unfortunately, I'm living this reality at this very moment. Holy c**p it's hard.
When you buy an 8-piece tupperware set, 4 of the pieces are lids.
I did this last month. My own fault. I was buying a lot of them because we have little mousies invading our house as winter sets in (we live in the middle of an agricultural area in southwest France and are surrounded by corn, grape, wheat, and sunflower fields during growing time), so I grabbed several stacks of Tupperware without checking. I got the opposite - one set was all bottoms and no lids. However, the upside is that all the mice voted me "Queen of the Harvest" after that and threw a little party for me. 🐁 🥳 🐁 🎉🐁 (Edited for misspelling)
That time period when your relationship switches and your parent looks to you for answers and advice, instead them being the one with all the answers.
I don't mind this; my Mom has done so much for me, I'm always happy when I can help her in return, even if it's a little thing like showing her how to use an app. And I bet if Dad were still around, it'd be the same.
I lost my Dad in 2014. Anything I can do for my Mom, I will. I know it's basically count down time.
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It's definitely not that anyone minds giving parents advice and looking after them . It's seeing them deteriorating with age and /or disease and the fact they feel so unsure / confused of themselves. Definitely a privilege too.. .
I can confidently say that, after having my mother AND mother-in-law live with us, I cannot recommend it. Raising parents is hard.
Oh I feel this. Down to my soul I feel this. In fact, I’m pretty sure that half the reason I decided to have a kid earlier this year was because what nuisance can an infant diapers and tantrums be compared to adult ones? I’m already cleaning up human shït on the regular, so I might as well add some cute onesies to my laundry load. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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My husband is an only child and we went through a period where we had to be "parents" to his parents at the end of their lives when his dad had dementia and his mom was in a nursing facility as well for several health issues, this was while we were also parenting our own child. Parenting on both ends was the hardest and most stressful time we ever went through in the 30 years we have been married.
Never really happened with me. I was in my 50's when they passed in their early 80's.
Or, when their answers start not applying to your life situation either because they're in a different mindset due to age, or because the world has changed. And then you realize... the younger generations are mostly still too young, the older generations are already set in their ways and looking back at a different version of the world, it comes down to you, YOU are the adult now.
Realizing organized religion is a bunch of nonsense
One dumb mistake and it could all be over.
That's what my wife tells me when it's my turn to put the kids to bed.
The average salary does not go up equivalent to the inflation rate.
It's been that way since Saint Ronnie Reagan in the US. Except for the C-suite, which went from 40 times the lowest wage to 400 times the lowest wage, partly thanks to government sanctioned union busting.
That the world doesn't stop when someone you love and need dies.
The hardest point of my life so far was when i was 8. My dad died, and my mom couldent take care of me and my little brother for a few months. I stayed with my grandparents, and my little brother stayed with my other grandparents. I started going to a new school, with everyone speacking in a language i knew only a little. It was super hard to deal with greif. And for everyone else, life goes on. No one knows what youre going through.
Finding out people without empathy exist. And they are hard to pin down - even after many years of exposure to them.
Sadly enough, this doesn't mean they are devoid of charm and therefore can do a LOT of damage.
When I was a kid I thought adults had everything figured out and couldn’t wait to grow up so I could be like them. HAH.
Recycling is, for the most part, a scam by corporations to move the physical and emotional weight of dealing with the harm their packaging causes off them and on to you.
No it's not. Is it what the corporations are trying to do, yes. But still every little act matters. It also depends a lot of the country's recycling infrasturucture. If recycling is made easier, much more people do it. And if bigger amount of people recycle, there are better ways to develop the whole industry. We have every kind of recycling bins in every single apartment complex in the cities, and close in other parts too, so it's just a everyday normal thing to recycle for us. It should be made as easy everywhere.
Churches are businesses that collect tax free money and provide very few actual services with it.
Discovering that you can pay 1700.00/mth rent, but can’t get a 1500/month mortgage
It's not just a $1500 a month mortgage though. It's property taxes, and insurance, and all the other higher taxes that go along with owning a home. If your roof needs to be replaced, or your pipes burst, you don't get to call the landlord and say "fix it" you've got have the thousands or 10's of thousands on hand to do the repair yourself.
The b******t of health insurance
I thought I'd grow up, move out, find my footing in the grown up world and basically switch into cruise mode. Now I'm in my 40s and s**t is confusing as f**k.
Yup, in my 40s as well and still wondering when the tutorial will be over.
Finding out that your parents are people, too, with weaknesses or flaws that you were blind to when you were young.
Really? We knew that long before we were adults. My parents also never adressed each other as "Mom" or "Dad" (or even many pet names like "dear", at least not that we heard) - they wanted us to know their real names and that they had had their own lives before us and still did, to an extent. I know they were never perfect, but they didn't have to be - I would not want any other parents than them ♥
As a millenial, I was raised to believe that going to college and getting a degree would guarantee me a good future job that would allow me to live comfortably 🥲
That working harder does not equal getting paid more or being promoted.
Realizing you'll probably never have the, "aha," moment that tells you what you want to do with your life and you'd better just pick the least depressing choice.
My A-ha moment was in the 80s...I didn't think it would Take on Me, but it did.
For me it was realizing the high school mindset in people never ends see it in 60 yr olds in Facebook now
That your boss probably didn't get where they are because they did your job well.
Modern workplace hierarchy is more akin to 18th century military. It's rare that someone will be raised from the ranks.
Finding out police don't have to help
That going to college and getting a 9-5 wasn’t going to be the fun, creative, latte-filled experience rom coms would have you believe.
Having worked blue collar and white collar, I can say definitively that blue collar is a hell of a lot more fun and fulfilling.
Finally owning a house, then realising you now have to go through the effort and expense of maintaining it.
It's great you've got a house for 100k, now enjoy saving and spending at least half that to stop it crumbling, leaking or falling down over the next decades.
Working hard will get you advancement in the company.
In reality, being a hard worker keeps you exactly where you are. Management will keep you churning out the good work you do without ever paying you any more than they do, and it make them look good.
A bachelor’s degree is not a coupon redeemable for one (1) full-time job in your field of choice after graduation.
When you finish eating your dinner and there is no magical person to wash the dishes and you have to wash them yourself.
Finding out your partner doesn't love you anymore, but just has high anxiety about leaving you.
Spending time trying to understand why something happened often doesn't lead to answers, and can only prolong your healing process. Sometimes "closure" is moving forward and not ruminating or trying to figure out why.
That there are no *adults*. Everyone's just doing their best
No adults, just teenagers pretending to be elders. Or elfs, I don't remember.
Christmas Bonuses almost NEVER exist. Worse fantasy than the clause...
In Spain we have the “ Paga extra de Navidad “ (Christmas bonus), which is a payment of the same amount as your monthly salary and is paid before Christmas. We also have a “paga extra de verano” summer bonus, which is paid before the summer vacation and is the same amount. If your job includes a variable salary according to your objective, you have an additional extra pay that is a percentage of your salary or a fixed amount determined in your contract.
Having to pay tax instead of getting a tax return.
First time this happened to me as a teenager shattered my heart. I had so many plans!
I think that's great. It means I've had the governments money for a year instead of them having mine.
realizing that by the time you're old enough to retire, social security probably won't exist anymore
Social Security was never about getting someone else's money, it is about getting your money back. This is not an entitlement but a pension, half paid by your employer. It is paid on first dollar of earnings and stops when you make more. The Republicans want you to believe it is a tax. If it is it is the most regressive tax on the books. How they spent your money is another thing.
When you realize basically everyone is just faking it til they make it.
Note: this post originally had 80 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.
I'm still struggling to accept how many vocal American "patriots" don't actually believe in freedom and equality, but do believe they should get to dictate how other people should live. In other words, they want to live in a tyranny, as long as they are among the tyrants.
Goes right to third religious beliefs too. Do as I say not as I do.
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To me it was the complete weakness of my fellow Americans to do something so small as to wear a mask to prevent the spread of a contagious disease. And the hoarding. I always knew there would be dissenters, but way underestimated the sheer number of selfish, stupid people there are. I lost a lot of respect for my community and neighbors. I'm just grateful that COVID, bad as it is, was a weak pandemic. I truly see how many weaklings there are in this country and the lengths they will go to defend their stupidity. In short, I have met the enemy and he is us.
I never had this kind of realization. This things are just what they are.. But I never had "santa doesn't exist" moment also, so.... it's true. All are like it.
I kind of chuckled when I read the title because, for me, learning Santa isn't real was a relief. I was very anxious about a stranger coming into our home in the middle of the night. Same as the Tooth Fairy and Easter bunny. My six year old self was pleased.
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I don't know if I'd use that phrasing, but for me, it was finding out that your body can betray you anytime after an accident and/or chronic illness. What didn't help was being told that I'm too young for *insert medical conditions I've been diagnosed with here* ... In my early 20s, a healthcare provider‡ said that I'm too young to have PTSD and that I can't because, "OnLy VeTeRaNs GeT PTSD." ‡ I'm no longer with said provider, but that stung. Sorry for the lengthy comment, all.
This comment is sure to be down voted, but... A lot of these sound like people who still haven't understood the harsh truth. Like people who have started to, and think they have it, but still have several levels to go before realizing it. Nothing wrong with that. Just saying some of you need to be prepared to realize you're in for more surprises/disappointments.
Many things on this list are true but some of them were lessons that should have been learned in our childhood.
The more I study history, the more convinced I am that the truth almost never comes out in any way that affects the flow of history. I could give hundreds of examples where the deceivers won, but no-one would believe the deceivers won, only that my examples are wrong. And in 90% of the cases where people say to themselves, "no really, I know the REAL truth," what they believe is the real truth is a more insidious deception. And even if they acknowledge the historicity of a claim, they'll STILL say, "well, yes, but" because 99% of the rest of what they believe are lies. And I'm no magic truth-discerner; I'm not suffering from schizophrenia and believing my truth is real and y'all just don't get it. 99% of what each of us believe is wrong; I only believe in a different 1% than most of y'all.
Case in point: Santa Claus is real. First reaction: "He's kidding." No, I'm not. Second reaction: "Well, yes, but...." We could do about a dozen rounds of that. And no, I don't believe in magic, flying reindeer, but believe me when I tell you I'll say, "No, really..." to as many times as you say, "Well, yes, but..." without you ever saying, "oh, he's just crazy/joking/playing devil's advocate."
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That my BP app all the sudden has ads I have to watch in order to enjoy my reading.
The title should be changed to "No Shįt,Sherlock "?
Finding out that the IPCC spin doctored the facts in order to come to a false conclusion. I was devastated to learn that.
Can you be a bit more vague, please ?
Load More Replies... None of this is rocket science and it probably has always been this way.
I'm still struggling to accept how many vocal American "patriots" don't actually believe in freedom and equality, but do believe they should get to dictate how other people should live. In other words, they want to live in a tyranny, as long as they are among the tyrants.
Goes right to third religious beliefs too. Do as I say not as I do.
Load More Replies... To me it was the complete weakness of my fellow Americans to do something so small as to wear a mask to prevent the spread of a contagious disease. And the hoarding. I always knew there would be dissenters, but way underestimated the sheer number of selfish, stupid people there are. I lost a lot of respect for my community and neighbors. I'm just grateful that COVID, bad as it is, was a weak pandemic. I truly see how many weaklings there are in this country and the lengths they will go to defend their stupidity. In short, I have met the enemy and he is us.
I never had this kind of realization. This things are just what they are.. But I never had "santa doesn't exist" moment also, so.... it's true. All are like it.
I kind of chuckled when I read the title because, for me, learning Santa isn't real was a relief. I was very anxious about a stranger coming into our home in the middle of the night. Same as the Tooth Fairy and Easter bunny. My six year old self was pleased.
Load More Replies... I don't know if I'd use that phrasing, but for me, it was finding out that your body can betray you anytime after an accident and/or chronic illness. What didn't help was being told that I'm too young for *insert medical conditions I've been diagnosed with here* ... In my early 20s, a healthcare provider‡ said that I'm too young to have PTSD and that I can't because, "OnLy VeTeRaNs GeT PTSD." ‡ I'm no longer with said provider, but that stung. Sorry for the lengthy comment, all.
This comment is sure to be down voted, but... A lot of these sound like people who still haven't understood the harsh truth. Like people who have started to, and think they have it, but still have several levels to go before realizing it. Nothing wrong with that. Just saying some of you need to be prepared to realize you're in for more surprises/disappointments.
Many things on this list are true but some of them were lessons that should have been learned in our childhood.
The more I study history, the more convinced I am that the truth almost never comes out in any way that affects the flow of history. I could give hundreds of examples where the deceivers won, but no-one would believe the deceivers won, only that my examples are wrong. And in 90% of the cases where people say to themselves, "no really, I know the REAL truth," what they believe is the real truth is a more insidious deception. And even if they acknowledge the historicity of a claim, they'll STILL say, "well, yes, but" because 99% of the rest of what they believe are lies. And I'm no magic truth-discerner; I'm not suffering from schizophrenia and believing my truth is real and y'all just don't get it. 99% of what each of us believe is wrong; I only believe in a different 1% than most of y'all.
Case in point: Santa Claus is real. First reaction: "He's kidding." No, I'm not. Second reaction: "Well, yes, but...." We could do about a dozen rounds of that. And no, I don't believe in magic, flying reindeer, but believe me when I tell you I'll say, "No, really..." to as many times as you say, "Well, yes, but..." without you ever saying, "oh, he's just crazy/joking/playing devil's advocate."
Load More Replies... That my BP app all the sudden has ads I have to watch in order to enjoy my reading.
The title should be changed to "No Shįt,Sherlock "?
Finding out that the IPCC spin doctored the facts in order to come to a false conclusion. I was devastated to learn that.
Can you be a bit more vague, please ?
Load More Replies... None of this is rocket science and it probably has always been this way.
