“The Lack Of Mobility”: 30 People Explain What They Hate The Most About Being Overweight
The World Health Organization reports that, as of 2022, 2.5 billion adults around the globe were overweight. And 890 million adults worldwide were living with obesity. But despite the fact that it’s so common to be plus-sized, fatphobia still seems to be running rampant in many societies.
To start a conversation about this, one woman recently invited fellow overweight individuals to share the worst aspects of being fat on TikTok. The comments were flooded with over a thousand open and honest replies, so we’ve gathered the most popular ones down below. Whether you’re plus-sized or not, we hope you can approach this topic with empathy. And be sure to upvote the responses that hit home for you.
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feeling like ppl have less respect for u as a professional because "u can't even control what ur own body"
Being gaslit by medical professionals and being blamed for my weight when it’s not physically possible for me to be eating enough to weigh DOUBLE what I should for my tiny height of 5’2”. It wasn’t until I found a nurse who looked like me in terms of height and build to get the help I needed to start losing weight again once I was put on the right meds. I wasn’t being lazy and overeating. My hormones were so out of whack that my body wasn’t cooperating and I was on the wrong meds. It’s sad how much women esp plus size women are mistreated medically. We are more at risk for neglect.
It's the first thing people see and judge you before they even know you
not being able to walk long distances, being exhausted after climbing 10 steps, etc... the lack of mobility was so hard
Can we talk about shoes if you’re overweight? Finding comfortable durable shoes that you can work distances in is ridiculously hard. If you want the to look fashionable as well, you quadruple the problem. Due to the extra weight you wear them out more quickly too.
it's getting warmer soon and that scares me so much, can't "hide" myself anymore
my toxic trait is to think that everything would be better if i were skinny
So much I could say about that statement! If you are fat and have type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol etc you need to be skinnier for your own health. If you want to be skinny because skinny people have the best life and no problems look at people like Ariana Grande who is skinny with health problems (too skinny can be associated with poor nutritional intake, mental health issues, fertility issues etc). It may sound trite, but good personality and good health are the goals to aim for
having a condition that isn't visible that causes weight gain but because no one can see it you're just seen as lazy. (pcos)
Having to make fat jokes about myself to stop other people doing it
the only clothes that fit and look good are astronomically expensive
Saw a dress for $500. Seriously who can afford that? It was cheap cotton, you know the seamstress doesn't get paid that much.
eating around other people and feeling like you don’t deserve it
this is a big one for me. i REALLY don't like eating in front of people.
trying something on that you thought looked too big and it didn’t end up fitting
Taking pictures with friends. I hate seeing myself next to them.
I tend to stand behind someone because I know I’ll have the photo of myself and it’d be all I’d notice if I were to be in front
I fear my side profile I don't look at it, I act like I only exist in 2D
I feel this. Looking at myself head-on in the mirror just to check my hair bothers me enough, but I've come to tolerate it and tell myself the things I like about myself, like my eyes. But seeing myself from the side? I can't stand the sight of my stomach from the side still.
people treating your friends so much differently than they treat you. it genuinely feels like nobody takes me seriously because my weight is the first thing they see
People judge you for being thin to. It's honestly both ways. I'm not insensitive to your pain. I was obese growing up (severely ridiculed) and lost it all. I prefer being fit overall as I like to move around with ease. But, ive witnessed judgements, disregard and disrespect being thin from others. Things that baffle me. I had a guy see me as a b***h and all I did was sit there and he wanted to talk with my heavier friend. Even when I went to stand next to her as we were leaving he just gave me a nasty look and shunned me out. Another time I had an employment office lady throw my resume and papers at my face violently saying they couldn't use me. I didn't do anything. I had experience and a letter of recommendation. She was overweight and then flirted with my husband standing next to me who got the job. He didn't even have a high-school diploma. People hate you for being skinny and they hate you for being fat.
when i was fat the most sad thing that i thought was when i watched a show and there was the main couple, and then i thought "i will never have that kind of love i'm disgusting, i will never get married, i will never have the first kiss, or child"
I was that kid. Turned out the only one who hated me was me. Okay so my family convinced me I was disgusting and unlovable, but I discovered that was all lies. I met the love of my life when I least expected it. 12 years still think I got the better end of the deal.
Canceling hang outs bcs I dont want people too see me like that or staring in the mirror in disgust
I didn't go to a family member's wedding because I didn't want them to see how fat I've become since Covid lockdown.
Desperately wanting to lose weight but being crippled with fear, about what you will look like afterwards and not wanting people to perceive me while exercising.
I have exercise equipment inside my tiny apartment. I have a treadmill and a stair stepper. I mostly go swimming in the pool and hot tub. The hot tub is bigger for exercise. I go opening as no one is out. Even a size medium or small I don't enjoy people watching me work out. You have to start somewhere if your unhappy and miserable with yourself. Baby steps work and it takes time. I like walks and bike rides. Lately it's walks. Having a harder time with bike rides now when I used to love them. It's traffic.
what hurts me the most growing up fat and just being fat is comments made by people I thought genuinely loved me. Like family members etc.. like don’t you love me?? Don’t you think I’m pretty?
I was obese as a kid with complete neglect. I lost all the weight and became fit and athletic at 21. The family called me disgusting for it. Made up excuses like I was on meth. No, I changed myself for the better including attending trauma therapy. I still deal with the impact of so much ridicule from the past. I had to raise myself and then re raise myself.
the world never lets you forget it,even if they don’t have bad intentions,they will mention it
Growing up, can't count how many times I heard family friends/relatives say ''She's a nice kid. Shame she's a big girl.''
Not being normal in other peoples eyes. Like my weight is the biggest (no pun intended) factor in deciding who I am as a person
for me it feels like my entire youth and 20s has been wasted. I could've been so much more🙁
walking in any fastfood store and feeling the stares.
As someone who worked in several fast food restaurants, the workers really don't judge anyone on their weight. They see a huge amount of different people during their career and weight is about the last thing they notice and their behaviour is much more important. Only instances where I judge anyone (inside my head) is when an overweight parent orders a obnoxiously unhealthy amount of food for their young kid.
My mom who is also fat told me that as a fat person you will feel like you cannot have any other flaws and that is so damn true!
Wishing to become Thinner everytime i See a shooting Star or blowing a dandelion, since i was Like 6
I wished I had cancer as a teenager. Because if I was that sick I would be thin.
For me it was the constant hyper focus of other people what i put in my shopping cart in a grocery store or what i ate
Are other people paying for what is in your cart? If yes they can judge, otherwise it's none of their business.
Everytime someone looks at me/ or even laughs in a vicinity near me, I think they are making fun of me or thinking ill of me. It could be anyone and I always think they are thinking im a big monster.
feeling always dirty?? and feeling that I waste nice hygiene products or pricey cosmetics cuz I don't deserve them anyway, cuz they are not meant for me? maybe it's weird idk
not having any childhood memories, no pictures taken throughout your childhood and teens. I dont have any pictures of myself from when I was younger.
Just the consistent and constant nagging thought about it. Is my stomach sitting funny in these jeans? Is my back showing below my top? Is my double chin super noticeable? It’s torture
Unsolicited comments about my weight from my dad crush me. I feel like he’ll never accept me or truly love me because of my weight.
I feel you. Been called a ''fkn fat lazy b*tc*'' by the male parent since I was 14.
Skinny people talking about "how fat they are" right infront of you to bait you into giving them complements. Also being treated less than human
So what your saying is both 'fat' and 'skinny' people want complements to make them feel better about themselves
Never experienced teenage love.
All through school, all one of my best friends wanted in life was to get married and to have children. She died in her late 40s, never going on a date, never getting kissed, and obviously never having a child. I think about her often and still feel so very bad for her. We were both overweight, but she was much more than me.
does anyone else feel like they can’t be mentally ill as a fat person, it’s so weird to explain but it feels like i have to be skinny to be considered actually mentally ill— not just in an ED way
This one makes a weird kind of sense. Like, pretty people with mental issues have an air of romance and mystery about them, or at least kindle a caring or compassionate vibe. Ugly people are just sloppy and cringey and need to get their s**t together.
the awkwardness of hugs, i feel so big and awkward, like I'm making them uncomfortable with my size
Side profile, feeling, the way others treat you, the way you don’t ever wanna get dressed and Ik this is a common experience but wanting to stay in hoodies, sweats. Pictures of yourself and realizing
"why is everyone else so pretty whilst being fat, when I'm so disgusting looking whilst fat?"
It’s never quiet in my head. I’m always watching for someone laughing, staring, judging. I can’t just *be* somewhere because I’m always looking for it
having “friends” who will post the ugliest pictures of you where it’s very obvious you’re the biggest one in the group.
Feeling like i can’t be the “clean girl” i feel so manly? Does this make sense? I just feel like i can’t be normal
not the worst, but bittersweet; being able to love and adore my own features on anyone, as long as it’s not me
being told by my mom that i shouldn’t wear certain things bc my stomach is out.
Honestly? Feeling like a literal bigger target when out and about, especially at night. I am not the ‘norm’ and it draws attention I’d rather not have late at night!
I hate my (non)jaw, and my double chin. But at the same time i cant change who i am. Thats a struggle
literally avoiding every single mirror in my life to the point where when I do catch my reflection, I see a total stranger
never knowing how is to just take less space. to roll up and be a little ball. i imagne it to be more cozy sensory wise. but maybe im just romanticizing what i never got to experience
Being told I’m unhealthy. I actually eat pretty healthy, walk my dog for an hour a day minimum, go to the gym and do a martial art yet I’m still fat
not being able to wear the clothes i want- half because they never look right on me and half because i rarely find cute things in my size
not being able to find my size in a normal clothes shop this was the happiest thing for me when I lost weight the first time I could buy clothes from a regular shop.
Calling myself the most vile things since I was a little girl just so I could prepare myself for what others called me so I wouldn’t be offended by it.
Not even wanting to put on makeup because I have no face structure anymore and nice outfits feel pointless because I have no shape
A good outfit will detract from what you don't want people to focus on and direct others attention to a positive feature
When people scoot around the topic and it’s SO OBVIOUS that they are trying to avoid any topics abt looks or weight
knowing nobody thinks i’m pretty, feeling ashamed when im out, think everyone is speaking about me, apron tummy that won’t go, weight loss but can’t tell bc of loose skin. it’s hell.
Feeling Like a bird in a Cage. all the other pretty birds flying around you, but you'r stuck there, Nobody can See how pretty you would fly too... soon i'm there too, Just keep going.
feeling like i'm not reaching my full potential, like i could always look better despite how much weight i lose
Knowing people will never say they think youre beautiful. You’re always just “cute” or have a pretty face.
I have a co-worker who gets upset when I call her cute so I try not to, but cute is an attractive quality to me. (She prefers I call her 'pretty' but that isn't a quality to me nor a word I use much in general)
Hearing my smaller friends talk about how fat they are knowing they are like half my size
So only 'fat' people are allowed to be unhappy with their appearance? Also your friends can't be comfortable around you and talk about what's bothering them? They should tread on eggshells instead so you won't get upset?
always feeling like i look worse while doing literally everything, always feeling like im huge and like im taking too much space wherever i am and whatever i do
feeling like I'll never be skinny and pretty enough because there's always someone thinner and just feeling disgusting and unlovable
And as someone who laughs all the time I make sure to cover my face.
Feeling intimidated by boys, not being able to dress ‘cozy cute’ just look ragged. Swimsuit
When people give you fake compliments and actually mean no harm but they’ll all of a sudden be nicer and compliment you in a way you know it’s not true and there only saying it cuz they feel like you're insecure, and want to make you feel pretty but you know it’s just to be nice even though they mean no harm, that’s worse than getting fat shamed for some reason
So sad. My heart breaks for you- society does do this to you, and it isn’t fair. My mother always drilled into me about how overweight people were disgusting. I considered myself lucky that I wasn’t fat, and I’m not now. But I feel that as I got older, and lived, that a person’s weight is not important in determining their worth, and I constantly fight myself and others on s****y snap judgments. I’m sorry. I know that a person’s worth has nothing to do with what they look like. I’m sorry that you have to experience this. I’m sorry that people judge everything about who you are as a person within a second of meeting you. I can’t change society, I’m working on changing myself. Your outside package is not the sum of you. And as someone who has my own outside package burdens, I wish I could share with each and everyone of you that judgment on your weight is b******t, and it doesn’t reflect on you, it reflects on the person who says it.
I don't know why you were down voted. Your comments are valid. Let me fix that with an upvote 😁
Load More Replies...People ignore that eating is an addiction. Sugar and fat are addicting, modern convenience foods are designed to be addictive, Healthy, low processed food is expensive, takes prep, and requires expertise and equipment. The time cost is high. It's less convenient, and food deserts where there are few "healthy food" options available, are a big problem. Everywhere around you, delicious sugar, ultra-processed carbs, fat and salt are cheap, delicious, convenient, and a comforting escape from the judgement, sadness and anxiety you live with every day. Exercise is expensive, expecially if you are a woman working full time. What are your free options if it's not safe to exercise outside? If your bedsit lacks space for exercise routines that assume you can lie down on the floor and spread your legs and arms without hitting something? If "taking the stairs" means judgement for being slow, sweaty and short of breath. Don't forget, when you're obese, almost all exercise is physically painful.
I think posts like this are useful in that they quietly help other people understand what another person feels without causing unnecessary drama. My hope is that it helps people be more kind and less judgmental towards others.
Judging from the comments, your hopes are in vain. But it's a nice thought.
Load More Replies...So sad. My heart breaks for you- society does do this to you, and it isn’t fair. My mother always drilled into me about how overweight people were disgusting. I considered myself lucky that I wasn’t fat, and I’m not now. But I feel that as I got older, and lived, that a person’s weight is not important in determining their worth, and I constantly fight myself and others on s****y snap judgments. I’m sorry. I know that a person’s worth has nothing to do with what they look like. I’m sorry that you have to experience this. I’m sorry that people judge everything about who you are as a person within a second of meeting you. I can’t change society, I’m working on changing myself. Your outside package is not the sum of you. And as someone who has my own outside package burdens, I wish I could share with each and everyone of you that judgment on your weight is b******t, and it doesn’t reflect on you, it reflects on the person who says it.
I don't know why you were down voted. Your comments are valid. Let me fix that with an upvote 😁
Load More Replies...People ignore that eating is an addiction. Sugar and fat are addicting, modern convenience foods are designed to be addictive, Healthy, low processed food is expensive, takes prep, and requires expertise and equipment. The time cost is high. It's less convenient, and food deserts where there are few "healthy food" options available, are a big problem. Everywhere around you, delicious sugar, ultra-processed carbs, fat and salt are cheap, delicious, convenient, and a comforting escape from the judgement, sadness and anxiety you live with every day. Exercise is expensive, expecially if you are a woman working full time. What are your free options if it's not safe to exercise outside? If your bedsit lacks space for exercise routines that assume you can lie down on the floor and spread your legs and arms without hitting something? If "taking the stairs" means judgement for being slow, sweaty and short of breath. Don't forget, when you're obese, almost all exercise is physically painful.
I think posts like this are useful in that they quietly help other people understand what another person feels without causing unnecessary drama. My hope is that it helps people be more kind and less judgmental towards others.
Judging from the comments, your hopes are in vain. But it's a nice thought.
Load More Replies...
