"Today is yours," we tell people on their birthday. "Enjoy it."

But sadly, nobody, not even Einstein, has owned that much time. If any. And in case we forget, the universe likes to remind us of that.

Bought 60 doughnuts for the office to celebrate? Too bad, you'll need to self-isolate and work from home. Baked yourself a cake? Oops, the floor ate it all.

So what do we do when we get the short end of the stick? The only thing there's left. Laugh. Here's an exclusive Bored Panda list of the most unfortunate birthdays. Enjoy!

#1

I Was The Only One Who Turned Up To My B-Day Party. So I Got Some Balloon Friends To Join

I Was The Only One Who Turned Up To My B-Day Party. So I Got Some Balloon Friends To Join

SlyMoonLlama Report

hyperunknown
Community Member
1 month ago (edited)

I approve of the similar logo on the balloons. Don't feel alienated though, atleast there's music. Pop-music, when you pop them.

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#2

The Worst Birthday Card I've Ever Gotten

The Worst Birthday Card I've Ever Gotten

randymachokingsavage Report

Troux
Community Member
1 month ago

Tell them where they can stick their card!

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Birthday rituals are historical and universal events, which have been around since the prehistoric era. But in ancient history, only the privileged had birthdays; the "parties" were solely reserved for kings and nobility members.

Familiar birthday customs and symbols are currently seen among most cultures, however, some people have adopted unique traditions, characterized by their values and way of life.

For example, in ancient Japan, children often died young, so nowadays, in addition to their actual parties, they participate in the 7-5-3 celebration (Shichi-go-san), held on November 15. The name refers to the ages of the children celebrated: any child who reaches age three, boys who reach age five, and girls who reach age seven. They put on fine clothing and visit a religious shrine in thankfulness for their health.

#3

My Kid During His Birthday Safari

My Kid During His Birthday Safari

spencabt Report

Lord Mysticlaw
Community Member
1 month ago

I swear I'm not laughing

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#4

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday!

CritterBoiFancy Report

Lytha
Community Member
1 month ago

First trauma ever.

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#5

Thank You, Facebook

Thank You, Facebook

Pirate_Redbeard Report

Lord Mysticlaw
Community Member
1 month ago

Wow, thanks Facebook

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Another interesting tradition is in Nepal, where it's considered good luck for the birthday girl or boy to have brightly colored rice yogurt smeared on their forehead. There may be cake, there may be gifts, but colorful, delicious, and sticky yogurt? Almost always.

Interestingly, ancient Greeks also celebrated their gods' birthdays. And we're having their "leftovers" even today. The Greeks had a tradition where they would bake a special cake made of wheat, honey, olive oil, and cheese. It was sometimes made into a lunar shape to honor the goddess Artemis. In honor of her beauty, candles were put on the cake to make it glow.

#6

It Was Supposed To Say Happy Birthday Lizard (Her Nickname)

It Was Supposed To Say Happy Birthday Lizard (Her Nickname)

katmermaid Report

Samantha Lomb
Community Member
1 month ago

She can't read anyway

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#7

Today’s My Birthday. No One Could Make It Over For Pizza And Games, The Power Went Out And I Twisted My Ankle Because I Couldn’t See Coming Down The Stairs

Today’s My Birthday. No One Could Make It Over For Pizza And Games, The Power Went Out And I Twisted My Ankle Because I Couldn’t See Coming Down The Stairs

It’ll be me, the guitar, and some tears tonight. Happy 20th to me!

dekusoup Report

Shona
Community Member
1 month ago

happy birthday to you tooooooo

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#8

Everyone Including My Parents Forgot It Was My Birthday Today, So I Improvised

Everyone Including My Parents Forgot It Was My Birthday Today, So I Improvised

Die_libtard Report

Shona
Community Member
1 month ago

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

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#9

My Friend's 16th Birthday Was On 9/11

My Friend's 16th Birthday Was On 9/11

Righteous_Fire Report

Serial pacifist
Community Member
1 month ago

...and it's still on 9/11.

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Over time, the birthday cake spread throughout the world. It is often thought that China was the first to bake a cake for a child's first birthday, but it's probably the Germans who actually modernized this tradition in the 18th century and made it what we know today.

German cakes typically included candles, one for each year the person had lived plus one more for good luck that they would survive the next. The Germans were also the first to start making a wish when blowing out the candles.

#10

My Quarantine Birthday Is Going Well

My Quarantine Birthday Is Going Well

watskii Report

Sergio Bicerra Descalzi
Community Member
1 month ago

Last pic face is like " try not to cry, try not to cry, be brave..."

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#11

Me And All The Friends I Invited To My Birthday

Me And All The Friends I Invited To My Birthday

SparkenSirius Report

Nor
Community Member
1 month ago

Just how rude...should charge them for not coming

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#12

Bought 60 Doughnuts For The Office Today To Celebrate My 20th Birthday, Only To Be Told I Need To Self Isolate/Work From Home For The Next Week

Bought 60 Doughnuts For The Office Today To Celebrate My 20th Birthday, Only To Be Told I Need To Self Isolate/Work From Home For The Next Week

Peencub Report

Troux
Community Member
1 month ago

Negative for COVID, positive for diabetes.

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#13

Someone Threw Away The Rest Of My Birthday Cake Before I Was Able To Take It Home

Someone Threw Away The Rest Of My Birthday Cake Before I Was Able To Take It Home

Grykllx Report

Lord Mysticlaw
Community Member
1 month ago

Why??? I hate it when people throw food away

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#14

Did This At Football Practice. On My Birthday

Did This At Football Practice. On My Birthday

jonesnet Report

Firefly I am
Community Member
1 month ago

Ooh, ouch. Hope that you got your banana arm fixed

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#15

Someone Cut The Cake That Was For Me Today At Work Without Telling Anyone In The Break Room

Someone Cut The Cake That Was For Me Today At Work Without Telling Anyone In The Break Room

GreenGzus Report

Mihai Mara
Community Member
1 month ago

Only a psychopath would cut it like this

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#16

It’s My Birthday. It’s Also The Only Day My Doctor Could Remove My 3 Kidney Stones (Laser Lithotripsy)

It’s My Birthday. It’s Also The Only Day My Doctor Could Remove My 3 Kidney Stones (Laser Lithotripsy)

CRRZ Report

Serial pacifist
Community Member
1 month ago

Still a good day.

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#17

Mom Made Me A Birthday Cake Last Year. Didn't Leave Enough Room To Dot The Exclamation Point

Mom Made Me A Birthday Cake Last Year. Didn't Leave Enough Room To Dot The Exclamation Point

AnaChevez69 Report

Troux
Community Member
1 month ago

Hmmm I'm not in the mood for chocolate right now...

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#18

Someone Stole My Professor's Birthday Cupcakes That He Left In His Room For Today

Someone Stole My Professor's Birthday Cupcakes That He Left In His Room For Today

SansyBoy14 Report

MauKini
Community Member
1 month ago

People steal everything. Last week someone stole the flower arrangements from my dads grave. On the exact day he died a year ago.

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#19

Whole Foods Prime Delivery For My Mom's Birthday

Whole Foods Prime Delivery For My Mom's Birthday

dreamboat252 Report

Serial pacifist
Community Member
1 month ago

Still worth slicing up.

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#20

How My Friend Is Celebrating His Birthday Today

How My Friend Is Celebrating His Birthday Today

CDC678 Report

Serial pacifist
Community Member
1 month ago

Join him.

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#21

When You Get A Cake For Your Birthday And You’re Older Brother Eats It Before You Celebrate Your Birthday

When You Get A Cake For Your Birthday And You’re Older Brother Eats It Before You Celebrate Your Birthday

dya37 Report

Debbie Barnes
Community Member
1 month ago

That is just wrong.. They'd be riots in my home if my brother had done this..

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#22

Absolutly No One Remembered My Birthday Except Another Person Who Has The Same Birthday As Me And Gave Me A Pen

Absolutly No One Remembered My Birthday Except Another Person Who Has The Same Birthday As Me And Gave Me A Pen

tobito3 Report

Shona
Community Member
1 month ago

aw thats so sweet i would keep that pen forever and ever!

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#23

It's My Birthday. I'm In The Hospital And They Don't Know What's Wrong

It's My Birthday. I'm In The Hospital And They Don't Know What's Wrong

rusrslolwth Report

Lytha
Community Member
1 month ago

I hope you will have an answer soon ... Happy birthday anyway!

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#24

Well, That's Annoying

Well, That's Annoying

Medicina Report

zims
Community Member
1 month ago

That's why fancy places have a wax/parchment paper layer between the box and the cake. (Incidentally, this is also why pizzas have those little plastic tables in the middle. Lid stays up, toppings stay down.)

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#25

Turned 26 Today, Contact Fell Out While Walking Into Work, Tried To Rub My Eye To Help The Irritation While Looking Down, And Walked Into A Brick Wall. Happy Birthday To Me

Turned 26 Today, Contact Fell Out While Walking Into Work, Tried To Rub My Eye To Help The Irritation While Looking Down, And Walked Into A Brick Wall. Happy Birthday To Me

DabDastic Report

Couch potato
Community Member
1 month ago

Welp. They are definitely having a worse day than me (and I thought I had it bad)

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#26

Had To Have Emergency Surgery To Get My Appendix Removed This Morning. Oh And It's My Birthday

Had To Have Emergency Surgery To Get My Appendix Removed This Morning. Oh And It's My Birthday

stairway_2evan Report

Cactus McCoy
Community Member
1 month ago

Hey, you got a brand new scar. That's forever!

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#27

My Mom Made Me A Pan Of Brownies For My Birthday, And My Son Insisted On To Carrying Them On The Way Home

My Mom Made Me A Pan Of Brownies For My Birthday, And My Son Insisted On To Carrying Them On The Way Home

Got back and somehow they ended up with a giant footprint in them.

nday79 Report

Stephanie Keith
Community Member
1 month ago

Those brownies are far from done.

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#28

Happy Birthday, Hope You Didn’t Want A Cake

Happy Birthday, Hope You Didn’t Want A Cake

MountainBear51 Report

Troux
Community Member
1 month ago

This is fixable. Take it inside and I'm sure they have the contact number for the person who ordered it.

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#29

Decided To Work On My Birthday Today, Was Going To Leave Early But Instead 3 People Called Out So Here I Am 12 And A Half Hours In And Still Going. Happy Birthday To Me

Decided To Work On My Birthday Today, Was Going To Leave Early But Instead 3 People Called Out So Here I Am 12 And A Half Hours In And Still Going. Happy Birthday To Me

DemonicFartbox Report

zims
Community Member
1 month ago

At least you get overtime pay?

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#30

My Mom Ordered A TV (Delivered By FedEx) For Me For My Birthday. We Just Opened It Up To Turn It On And...

My Mom Ordered A TV (Delivered By FedEx) For Me For My Birthday. We Just Opened It Up To Turn It On And...

XyroGame Report

Serial pacifist
Community Member
1 month ago

Darn. The TV brand says Onn, but it's definitely Off.

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#31

The USPS Cares. About Stealing Your Birthday Money Sent From Your Poor Grandmother

The USPS Cares. About Stealing Your Birthday Money Sent From Your Poor Grandmother

--TheLady0fTheLake-- Report

zims
Community Member
1 month ago

Report it to the post master of your local branch. If someone's stealing they can set up a sting to catch them. It's a big deal to mess with mail.

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#32

This Was My Dad's Boat On Our 2nd Time Out After Buying It. It Was Also On My Birthday

This Was My Dad's Boat On Our 2nd Time Out After Buying It. It Was Also On My Birthday

Lpeck1 Report

Samantha Lomb
Community Member
1 month ago

Oh I remember mom getting dad a boat as a surprise for his 40th? Birthday . She had my uncle park it in the drive when we were at the restaurant and when we came home we all started singing "Happy Birthday" while my dad starts shouting "Who the hell parked their goddamned boat in my driveway!?" It took him a while to catch on. Needless to say, not the reaction my mom was looking for

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#33

Homeless On My Birthday And Out Of Gas. Such Is Life I Guess

Homeless On My Birthday And Out Of Gas. Such Is Life I Guess

atomrameau Report

Debbie Barnes
Community Member
1 month ago

I'm hoping there will come a day when you look back to this day and remember how far you've come.....

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#34

Birthday Gift From My Family To My Introverted Self So I'll Have "Someone To Talk To"

Birthday Gift From My Family To My Introverted Self So I'll Have "Someone To Talk To"

but_im_not_a_pro Report

Rick
Community Member
1 month ago

I’d say that’s a pretty nice gift.

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#35

My Mom Wanted To Surprise Me With A Delivery Of My Favorite Pizza & Ice Cream From Ohio To LA For My Birthday. UPS Lost The Package For 2 Days And Delivered On The 3rd - Refused Refund

My Mom Wanted To Surprise Me With A Delivery Of My Favorite Pizza & Ice Cream From Ohio To LA For My Birthday. UPS Lost The Package For 2 Days And Delivered On The 3rd - Refused Refund

She packed it in a cooler on ice & shipped via UPS for $350+ so it could be delivered the next day during my birthday party.

Shibbroni Report

Lytha
Community Member
1 month ago

It was a wonderful attention, thank you mom! And UPS .... grrr!

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#36

I Tested Positive For Covid-19 On My Birthday

I Tested Positive For Covid-19 On My Birthday

melonpear Report

Troux
Community Member
1 month ago

New Year's Resolution: Survive.

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#37

One Of My Dogs Decided The Best Way To Start My Birthday Was To Get Sprayed By A Skunk Right Before We Went To Bed And Now Our Whole House Smells Like Skunk

One Of My Dogs Decided The Best Way To Start My Birthday Was To Get Sprayed By A Skunk Right Before We Went To Bed And Now Our Whole House Smells Like Skunk

Blind_Chauffer Report

Mazer
Community Member
1 month ago

From an MIT grad: Mix together: 1 quart of 3-percent hydrogen peroxide (available at any pharmacy) 1/4 cup baking soda. 1 teaspoon liquid dishwashing soap. Put on dog, let sit a few minutes Never bottle it, it will explode Might take two washes Happy Birthday PS - I am a dog lover, my best friend got a stick for their birthday. No I don’t own a dog, no the stick wasn’t for a dog Who do you people think I am??

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#38

My Little Brother Had His Appendix Removed On His 11th Birthday

My Little Brother Had His Appendix Removed On His 11th Birthday

lennox98 Report

Lord Mysticlaw
Community Member
1 month ago

He does look pretty happy though

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#39

Today Is My Birthday And This Is What Should Have Become My Cake

Today Is My Birthday And This Is What Should Have Become My Cake

skulpturlamm29 Report

Firstname Lastname
Community Member
1 month ago

Am I the only one that saw Tubby Custard? i-612c859705888.gif i-612c859705888.gif

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#40

At My 30th Birthday, One Of My Friends Dropped His Phone On The Cake. One Of My Best Memory And One Of His Worst

At My 30th Birthday, One Of My Friends Dropped His Phone On The Cake. One Of My Best Memory And One Of His Worst

Oppapaerdna Report

zims
Community Member
1 month ago

"Tanti Auguri Andre" means Congratulations Andre in Italian.

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#41

Yesterday, On My Birthday, Some Lady Decided To Cut Across Traffic And Hit Me Head On

Yesterday, On My Birthday, Some Lady Decided To Cut Across Traffic And Hit Me Head On

SargeantMasoff Report

Joe Blow
Community Member
1 month ago

was she driving a dog?

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#42

My Parents Gave Me This As A Birthday Present Today. For When I Leave Home And Want To Travel

My Parents Gave Me This As A Birthday Present Today. For When I Leave Home And Want To Travel

Heavenlygert Report

YoyoSthlm
Community Member
1 month ago

Not a bad gift!!

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#43

Today Is My Birthday, And All I Can Do Due To Restrictions Is Buy A Whole Box Of Donuts For Myself

Today Is My Birthday, And All I Can Do Due To Restrictions Is Buy A Whole Box Of Donuts For Myself

mwise723 Report

zims
Community Member
1 month ago

The nice thing about prepacked donuts is you can redecorate them yourself. Get some frosting and sprinkles, maybe some candy bars or fruit, and go to town (at home.)

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#44

Kid Spitting All Over The Cake

Kid Spitting All Over The Cake

Orangeknight464 Report

Sleazy Weaver
Community Member
1 month ago

I really can't fathom why people don't give little kids their own cupcake with a candle to blow out instead of ruining an entire cake. It's wasteful, not to mention disrespectful to guests...

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#45

I Ate It Anyway. 4 Hours Of Baking, Half An Hour Before My Bday BBQ, Dropped On The Ground. And Every Piece Was Savored

I Ate It Anyway. 4 Hours Of Baking, Half An Hour Before My Bday BBQ, Dropped On The Ground. And Every Piece Was Savored

heatherfeatherwan Report

zims
Community Member
1 month ago

Gotta admire the dedication.

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#46

Social Distancing During My Birthday

Social Distancing During My Birthday

sgtsmith5018 Report

~hUmMuS vIbEs~
Community Member
1 month ago

Well you need to social distance from your friends, even if they're invisible.

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#47

My Husband Baked Me A Cake For My Birthday And Put It In The Oven So Our Dogs Couldn't Get It. I Was Not Aware And Turned On The Oven

My Husband Baked Me A Cake For My Birthday And Put It In The Oven So Our Dogs Couldn't Get It. I Was Not Aware And Turned On The Oven

tlynne127 Report

zims
Community Member
1 month ago

Life lesson: always check inside before turning on your oven, shower, or washer/dryer.

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#48

Bought Myself A Birthday Cake Yesterday. Then The Rest Of My Family Found It

Bought Myself A Birthday Cake Yesterday. Then The Rest Of My Family Found It

gentlybeepingheart Report

zims
Community Member
1 month ago

Who just...east random cake they haven't been offered? ESPECIALLY when it's on or near a family member's birthday?!

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#49

My Friends And I Went Out To Celebrate One Of My Friend’s Birthday, Only To Come Back To Have My Friend’s $7000 Camera Stolen On His B-Day

My Friends And I Went Out To Celebrate One Of My Friend’s Birthday, Only To Come Back To Have My Friend’s $7000 Camera Stolen On His B-Day

applebuddahh Report

Rose the Cook
Community Member
1 month ago

Who leaves valuables in the car where they can be seen?

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#50

My Mom Sent Me A Birthday Care Package From Cross Country With My Favorite Candy. This Is What LA Heat Did To My Precious Milk Duds

My Mom Sent Me A Birthday Care Package From Cross Country With My Favorite Candy. This Is What LA Heat Did To My Precious Milk Duds

Grootdrew Report

Mihai Mara
Community Member
1 month ago

Never send perishable goods when you know the weather conditions will surely destroy / alter those goods.

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Note: this post originally had 74 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.