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30 Honest Reasons Why People Don’t Want Kids, Tweeted In Response To The News That The US Birth Rate Continues To Plummet
The National Center for Health Statistics, part of the CDC, shared some worrying numbers in a report published on Wednesday this week: the number of babies born in the United States dropped by a whopping 4 percent in 2020, compared to the previous year. It’s part of a trend that has seen the lowest number of births in the country since 1979. In the long-term, this could spell serious issues for the country (or might be beneficial to the planet, depending on your point of view).
And while everyone—from experts to ordinary Americans—appears to have an opinion as to _why_ the birth rates are declining, not all of those reasons apply to everyone equally. So the women of America took to Twitter and explained exactly why they personally aren’t having children and might not want to start a family in the future. They’re refreshingly honest takes on the question.
You’ll find their candid opinions below, so have a read, and let us know what you think, dear Pandas. Remember, this is a sensitive subject with people likely to have very strong opinions both for and against having kids, so let’s all try to keep it civil.
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This should be higher. So accurate, and I think there are many people in similar situations that feel the same.
According to the National Center for Health Statistics., the US total fertility rate remains far below replacement. “The rate has generally been below replacement since 1971 and has consistently been below replacement since 2007,” they explain.
Last year, around 3.6 million babies were born in the United States. Meanwhile, the number of births was found to have fallen across the board, across all ethnicities and origins. What’s more, the birthrate fell in most age groups and failed to go up in any one of them. And while these unborn Americans could be replaced by immigrants from other nations, if we’re talking purely in cold economic terms, that’s another sensitive political discussion that’s been splitting the US in two.
Full disclosure, dear Pandas: this reporter is very pro-people. I come from a fairly large family and I can’t imagine not wanting to have lots and lots of kids (maybe on a ranch somewhere or we could all become amateur detectives in a major city). However, one of my cardinal virtues is the freedom of will. It’s pretty much at the top of my hierarchy of what’s important. So I could never imagine telling somebody that they must or must not have kids, for whatever reasons. It’s down to each and every one of us to decide what we should do for our very own personal reasons.
Let's not forget about inflation on top of those stagnant wages
Godexx forbid we have paid parental leave like nearly every other industrialized nation on earth.
And while the human race has its fair share of problems, from the mundane and irritating to the downright devastating, it’s also full of light. Not to sound too childish, but I like people. So the fact that there are fewer people being born than in previous years means there’s a bit less potential awesomeness and creativity in the world. But, hey, your point of view might be different—and I’m perfectly fine with that.
Yup. We are poor because we had kids - because to nurse them it is impossible to work and then kids get sick, a lot, which means someone has to be home with them - we have minimal sick leave and this makes working and having a child impossible. So one of us is home (me), BUT as a biologist/biochemist who understands evolution I also understand this artificial bottleneck in our population is a genetic opportunity. We're financially poor, deliberately, but banking on generational (non-economic) wealth. There is rich and there is rich, we have a rich life and we also get to go extreme minimal on our taxing the earth (our household is carbon neutral for eg) and we have kids. We'll never be middle class (rich to me), but maybe that's okay, IDK.
While it’s everyone’s individual choice whether to have children, when we zoom out to the macro scale, there are potentially disastrous implications to society. Simply put, society can’t function without people. Without them, you don’t have a strong country: you have fewer innovators and friendly neighbors willing to lend a helping hand. You simply have a mass of land with very few things going on there.
You also have the right to ask them why they are so concerned with what goes on in your crotchal region. Those are the same types of people who are overly concerned with the genitals of said child (not in a pedo way, just 'is it a girl or a boy'). Of course, that invites more conversation. A good 'none of your fu***** business' is an acceptable answer, too. Just be sure to yell it really loudly and make them uncomfortable. I highly suggest Naruto running the other way after yelling it, maybe throw and iced coffee on them for good measure. Maybe they'll think twice or at least spread it around that you're crazy. Fewer questions.
So, dear Readers, what do you think about this difficult topic? What’s your view about the declining birth rate in the US and the reasons people give for not wanting children? Do you think that there should be fewer people on Planet Earth or does the problem lie not in the number of people but in our lifestyles and how we view the environment? Share your thoughts below.
Gotta ask about the text-censorship in this post. One word largely blacked-out, then the same(?) word not blacked out. Is this a human error, or machine error, or just an overall bad idea?
Actually, it WILL maim you permanently. Some get away with small, easy to ignore problems, but that little parasite will leave you with some permanent damage that you will then be routinely ignored or gaslit for. And make no mistake, a fetus may not be a parasite in it's full definition, but it is absolutely parasitic on the host's body.
It's not counterintuitive at all. This relationship is well-known. Education and privilege mean more choice, general, and given real choices in life, women in almost all cultures will choose to have fewer children.
well most parents are doing the "counting on a lot of people to not have kids and make the world a better place in a generation"
Totally true. I wouldn't have 3 kids, a fulltime job and great career, be with a fulltime working partner, if my (European) country wouldn't have provided support, as it does for any family here. Fully paid parental leave, "free" health care, free education, a guaranteed nursery and kindergarden place in your vicinity and financial support for parents who need it (not to be repaid). That's what it takes to get the middle class to reproduce, too.
I was in line to pick up a uniform etc. at a job fair at our local baseball stadium last year. The majority of the jobs were part-time. The man directly in front of me was older and telling his friend how he was raising his grandkids (couldn't help but overhear). I got the impression that he wasn't too happy about that but had no choice. Also he really needed the extra income from this little part-time job with relatively few hours. Then of course the pandemic hit, no baseball! I often think about that man and his family. I hope they are doing okay...
Some of us just hate children and that’s #1 why we won’t have kids. Plus being too busy and preferring vacations and sex more.
I know families with more than two kids who are definitely not wealthy. They make it work and it’s worth it to them. It also requires huge sacrifices in other areas. It’s not right or wrong, it depends on priorities and most people will decide it isn’t worth it for them.
If you don’t want to be judged for not having kids, extend the same courtesy to those who do have them. Having children is not abuse, and the lives of children born today will likely be better than those of 99% of humans who have ever lived. Don’t have children if you don’t want, but don’t be a judgmental asshole while complaining about other people being judgmental assholes.
My reasons why I never had kids - all of the above. And then some hard honesty... 1. they're noisy. 2. they cost a lot of money to raise. 3. I'm selfish and want all my money for ME. 4. they make a lot of messes. 5. they carry a lot of germs. 6. they're just downright annoying - the talking, the crying. 7. I just can't stand to be around them. There, I've said it. Call me a b*tch, but I don't care. I won't even date someone with kids.
People choosing not to have children fall into two categories. Those who are happily child free, and those who want children but can't due to economic or other outside factors The first is great! People should be able to live their lives as they want, and children deserve to be raised by parents who truly want them. The second is not only heartbreaking for the people involved, but when it is widespread across an entire generation is a serious red flag that society is broken.
How about the fact that in no time in my life did I ever want children. I don't need to explain this, It is my preference and that's it.
It is perfectly fine if you don't want kids. But kid shamming goes both ways. I have been made fun of for wanting lots of kids just as much as my friend has been made fun of for wanting no kids.
I live in the UK where we do have paid maternity leave, we have minimum wage requirements and free healthcare and I still don't want kids. There is a long history of mental health issues in my family and I've suffered from clinical depression and I would not wish this on anyone else. Plus I hate kids. I don't like the little germ factories and I certainly don't have the maturity to look after one. I'm just starting menopause now and I'm very glad I don't have to justify why I'm not having kids.
Imagine being this obsessed with the contents of a uterus that doesn't belong to you.
I don't get why this is such a big deal? I'm glad birthdates are down. There's too many people on this planet. The younger generations are potentially saving our planet by not having kids. I applauded and thank you all for making a wise and selfless choice.
in italy the birth rate is very low but at least here we have paid maternity leave and giving birth is free, and healthcare is free too (and college isn't putting people in crippling debit). here we have so many elderly people that our state struggles a lot to pay thier retirement, and we aren't a very rich country for the majority so maybe that's why out birth rate is low. also, global warming.
Yeah the dystopian issues are really off putting for me. Not that I'm particularly interested anyways, but any chance of me deciding to have kids is immediately taken out by the fact that I would literally be forcing them into a hellscape. Personally I hate the fact that I was born into a world that has so many overwhelming and depressing issues, but I also know I'm not getting the worst of it so far. So yeah, having kids is out of the question for me. (Semi-related side note: I really hate how some people say things like "the kids are going to save the planet", "the kids are the future" etc etc because it's like...you're still alive and able, so why are you choosing to ignore everything and basically just push the responsibility to the kids?? The only reason kids like Greta Thunberg are becoming activists is because they are seeing the adults not doing enough, and feeling forced. Because they know they will be the ones facing the consequences. That's not something to romanticize.)
It's alright you all. I've had 7 kids. I'm broke, but I'm happy. And at the age of 40 I'm in school on my way to a career as a nurse practitioner. By the time the majority of my kids are out of the house I'll finally be making enough money to support them 😂. So for those of you who don't want kids, just tell them I made up for it for you. 😁
4 kids in my family ages 55-62. None of us had kids. Even though we had a typical 60's upbringing with mom at home and dad working, it was a tightly budgeted house because dad was a school teacher and we all know how much the government appreciates and rewards teachers/s. Lots of fights between the kids over having to share everything, including splitting treats. Then there were the parental threats of wait til you have kids of your own. So we didn't. I would also guess that all 4 of us being adopted in infancy may have contributed to an attachment disorder.
Two thoughts on this: first, apparently FIFTY PERCENT of pregnancies are unplanned - and that's just in developed countries where the population is educated to a degree. And secondly, do people ever question WHY they're procreating? 'Continuing the family name' and 'because the bible says we need to' are lame and outdated excuses. Everyone needs to read a book (it's a novel, a thriller) called 10:59 by N. R. Baker - the facts contained in it actually shocked me and made me look at the world in a whole new light. It's brilliant and the message is vital to the continuation of our species and to the planet.
Isn't fertility becoming a huge issue now too. Not only are people choosing not to have kids but fewer people are able now bc of less viable sperm and problems w women's reproduction as well. Pollution caused by the wealthy and corporations is killing us and the planet.
What about all the foster kids in the system? Maybe people can adopt those instead of crapping out more carbon copies of themselves. Not everyone wants kids and there are many reasons why many of us chose not to have them. There's no shame in not having them or in adopting.
The world has changed dramatically and the birthrate has changed to reflect that good change. A great sign of a society is an increase in the age of first birth. When you live in a place with high disease, war, poverty, etc, you need to have more kids early just to survive. You need more free labor to do whatever the family is doing and there's a higher chance they'll die so you need replacements. On top of that, you may not be able to control when the first kid comes(no contraceptive access, patriarchy, etc) When you have more stability with more safety, you have the option to delay having kids until you are ready for them instead of needing them. You move the average age of first birth from 16 to 32 when you are better prepared to have a child that you want, you halve the birth rate. A nice side effect is you then have less people competing for the same resources instead of more.
Oh dear... From the above, it looks like a lot of the people having kids are going to be right-wing fundies.
I don't want children because I don't want to pass on any of the genetic disorders I have and that I'm a carrier of. I know there is a chance that they might not inherit them but I don't want to risk it. Also I have medical conditions which would make it hard for me to carry a child. I would rather take in a child who NEEDS love and safe home than have my own child
There is a population decline in much of the western world. The biggest consequence will be that at some point, there will not be enough working young people in existence to support the vast numbers of senior citizens expecting to live off a state pension. I'm thinking in the next 20-30 years, we will see a complete collapse of the pension system in many countries.
This is kinda like assuming interest rates should forever be on the increase, as if a decrease is a BAD thing. Fewer people = less pressure on limited resources, reduced adverse impact upon the environment, better quality of life for future generations. This needs to become the international norm for a few centuries, not an exception worthy of panic.
Because in the past generations that faced poverty, it was hard not to have children if you were married. There was social pressure to marry in the first place, and no birth control. Whereas now there is a lot less pressure and many ways to avoid unwanted pregnancy. I doubt that women in Ireland in the 18th century were too keen to have 8 kids either, but what choice did they have.
It's a shame. Most countries in the world have healthcare, maternity leave, sick days. USA is messed up. Though, I have other reasons not to want kids.
What comes immediately to my mind (and perhaps belongs in a different thread) is; why so much infertility now? Is inability to become pregnant / or carry a fetus increasing? It is certainly no one's business if your body isn't fully functioning but I do wonder if this anomaly is increasing. I am one of 6 sisters; 41-70, two cannot have children. I have 3 daughters; 41 to 46, two cannot have children. That seems a high percentage.
I wish people have fewer children; it's overpopulation in poor countries and overconsumption in rich countries, the environmental devastation inthe entire world.
Why have children when there isn't the time to enjoy them? Working too much ,no real maternity leave . It's just going to be a guilt trip about how you're not present enough.
Another diabolical US situation, once considered the greatest country on Earth by many. It is not that bad in Europe yet (lived in several countries) but we're getting there. Telltale sign: insane property prices in cities. I've seen a 10 to 100 times price increase in 25 years in Prague, depending on the city part. 100 times: ruins that once sold for 300K CZK fetch now, after renovation, 30M CZK. Who can afford this? Well, apparently some can. An average 100m2 house can be anywhere between 5 an 15 M CZK. So those owners will be paying most of their lives - but renting will cost monthly even more.
I applaud people who are self aware enough to know they would not or do not want to make good parents. Money is a factor, but not the only factor. My great grandparents raised my grandparents through the Great Depression and successfully so. I delayed having children, but they were worth the wait. Having children is not about you the parent, it is about the children becoming independent and responsible adults.
When the world is burning and the rich are killing each other over the last dusty bottles of Perrier, I will stand on the hot sands and scream into the boiling ocean "I AM THE LAST OF MY TRIBE. DO YOUR CHILDREN TASTE DELICIOUS, KAREN? DO THEY!?"
What annoys me is countries that don't take care of our planet and then we other ones have to be extra extra careful. And even then we will be screwed if THEY don't change their ways! Infuriating.
Bored Pandians are hypocrites. They whine about Disney posts every other week, and then they love anti-child posts.
No one in their right mind would bring kids into this F'd up planet now.
I- just- I-. I don't know what to say anymore. I think that we truly have the potential to do good and I think the best thing to fix the world is us. It hurts to see how we've given up on ourselves. These posts make me feel like a nuisance to my parents and a nuisance to humanity. I should have avoided this. All I want to do is help, but it seems like the best way to do so is not to have kids. Which I do want.
People choosing not to have children fall into two categories. Those who are happily child free, and those who want children but can't due to economic or other outside factors The first is great! People should be able to live their lives as they want, and children deserve to be raised by parents who truly want them. The second is not only heartbreaking for the people involved, but when it is widespread across an entire generation is a serious red flag that society is broken.
How about the fact that in no time in my life did I ever want children. I don't need to explain this, It is my preference and that's it.
It is perfectly fine if you don't want kids. But kid shamming goes both ways. I have been made fun of for wanting lots of kids just as much as my friend has been made fun of for wanting no kids.
I live in the UK where we do have paid maternity leave, we have minimum wage requirements and free healthcare and I still don't want kids. There is a long history of mental health issues in my family and I've suffered from clinical depression and I would not wish this on anyone else. Plus I hate kids. I don't like the little germ factories and I certainly don't have the maturity to look after one. I'm just starting menopause now and I'm very glad I don't have to justify why I'm not having kids.
Imagine being this obsessed with the contents of a uterus that doesn't belong to you.
I don't get why this is such a big deal? I'm glad birthdates are down. There's too many people on this planet. The younger generations are potentially saving our planet by not having kids. I applauded and thank you all for making a wise and selfless choice.
in italy the birth rate is very low but at least here we have paid maternity leave and giving birth is free, and healthcare is free too (and college isn't putting people in crippling debit). here we have so many elderly people that our state struggles a lot to pay thier retirement, and we aren't a very rich country for the majority so maybe that's why out birth rate is low. also, global warming.
Yeah the dystopian issues are really off putting for me. Not that I'm particularly interested anyways, but any chance of me deciding to have kids is immediately taken out by the fact that I would literally be forcing them into a hellscape. Personally I hate the fact that I was born into a world that has so many overwhelming and depressing issues, but I also know I'm not getting the worst of it so far. So yeah, having kids is out of the question for me. (Semi-related side note: I really hate how some people say things like "the kids are going to save the planet", "the kids are the future" etc etc because it's like...you're still alive and able, so why are you choosing to ignore everything and basically just push the responsibility to the kids?? The only reason kids like Greta Thunberg are becoming activists is because they are seeing the adults not doing enough, and feeling forced. Because they know they will be the ones facing the consequences. That's not something to romanticize.)
It's alright you all. I've had 7 kids. I'm broke, but I'm happy. And at the age of 40 I'm in school on my way to a career as a nurse practitioner. By the time the majority of my kids are out of the house I'll finally be making enough money to support them 😂. So for those of you who don't want kids, just tell them I made up for it for you. 😁
4 kids in my family ages 55-62. None of us had kids. Even though we had a typical 60's upbringing with mom at home and dad working, it was a tightly budgeted house because dad was a school teacher and we all know how much the government appreciates and rewards teachers/s. Lots of fights between the kids over having to share everything, including splitting treats. Then there were the parental threats of wait til you have kids of your own. So we didn't. I would also guess that all 4 of us being adopted in infancy may have contributed to an attachment disorder.
Two thoughts on this: first, apparently FIFTY PERCENT of pregnancies are unplanned - and that's just in developed countries where the population is educated to a degree. And secondly, do people ever question WHY they're procreating? 'Continuing the family name' and 'because the bible says we need to' are lame and outdated excuses. Everyone needs to read a book (it's a novel, a thriller) called 10:59 by N. R. Baker - the facts contained in it actually shocked me and made me look at the world in a whole new light. It's brilliant and the message is vital to the continuation of our species and to the planet.
Isn't fertility becoming a huge issue now too. Not only are people choosing not to have kids but fewer people are able now bc of less viable sperm and problems w women's reproduction as well. Pollution caused by the wealthy and corporations is killing us and the planet.
What about all the foster kids in the system? Maybe people can adopt those instead of crapping out more carbon copies of themselves. Not everyone wants kids and there are many reasons why many of us chose not to have them. There's no shame in not having them or in adopting.
The world has changed dramatically and the birthrate has changed to reflect that good change. A great sign of a society is an increase in the age of first birth. When you live in a place with high disease, war, poverty, etc, you need to have more kids early just to survive. You need more free labor to do whatever the family is doing and there's a higher chance they'll die so you need replacements. On top of that, you may not be able to control when the first kid comes(no contraceptive access, patriarchy, etc) When you have more stability with more safety, you have the option to delay having kids until you are ready for them instead of needing them. You move the average age of first birth from 16 to 32 when you are better prepared to have a child that you want, you halve the birth rate. A nice side effect is you then have less people competing for the same resources instead of more.
Oh dear... From the above, it looks like a lot of the people having kids are going to be right-wing fundies.
I don't want children because I don't want to pass on any of the genetic disorders I have and that I'm a carrier of. I know there is a chance that they might not inherit them but I don't want to risk it. Also I have medical conditions which would make it hard for me to carry a child. I would rather take in a child who NEEDS love and safe home than have my own child
There is a population decline in much of the western world. The biggest consequence will be that at some point, there will not be enough working young people in existence to support the vast numbers of senior citizens expecting to live off a state pension. I'm thinking in the next 20-30 years, we will see a complete collapse of the pension system in many countries.
This is kinda like assuming interest rates should forever be on the increase, as if a decrease is a BAD thing. Fewer people = less pressure on limited resources, reduced adverse impact upon the environment, better quality of life for future generations. This needs to become the international norm for a few centuries, not an exception worthy of panic.
Because in the past generations that faced poverty, it was hard not to have children if you were married. There was social pressure to marry in the first place, and no birth control. Whereas now there is a lot less pressure and many ways to avoid unwanted pregnancy. I doubt that women in Ireland in the 18th century were too keen to have 8 kids either, but what choice did they have.
It's a shame. Most countries in the world have healthcare, maternity leave, sick days. USA is messed up. Though, I have other reasons not to want kids.
What comes immediately to my mind (and perhaps belongs in a different thread) is; why so much infertility now? Is inability to become pregnant / or carry a fetus increasing? It is certainly no one's business if your body isn't fully functioning but I do wonder if this anomaly is increasing. I am one of 6 sisters; 41-70, two cannot have children. I have 3 daughters; 41 to 46, two cannot have children. That seems a high percentage.
I wish people have fewer children; it's overpopulation in poor countries and overconsumption in rich countries, the environmental devastation inthe entire world.
Why have children when there isn't the time to enjoy them? Working too much ,no real maternity leave . It's just going to be a guilt trip about how you're not present enough.
Another diabolical US situation, once considered the greatest country on Earth by many. It is not that bad in Europe yet (lived in several countries) but we're getting there. Telltale sign: insane property prices in cities. I've seen a 10 to 100 times price increase in 25 years in Prague, depending on the city part. 100 times: ruins that once sold for 300K CZK fetch now, after renovation, 30M CZK. Who can afford this? Well, apparently some can. An average 100m2 house can be anywhere between 5 an 15 M CZK. So those owners will be paying most of their lives - but renting will cost monthly even more.
I applaud people who are self aware enough to know they would not or do not want to make good parents. Money is a factor, but not the only factor. My great grandparents raised my grandparents through the Great Depression and successfully so. I delayed having children, but they were worth the wait. Having children is not about you the parent, it is about the children becoming independent and responsible adults.
When the world is burning and the rich are killing each other over the last dusty bottles of Perrier, I will stand on the hot sands and scream into the boiling ocean "I AM THE LAST OF MY TRIBE. DO YOUR CHILDREN TASTE DELICIOUS, KAREN? DO THEY!?"
What annoys me is countries that don't take care of our planet and then we other ones have to be extra extra careful. And even then we will be screwed if THEY don't change their ways! Infuriating.
Bored Pandians are hypocrites. They whine about Disney posts every other week, and then they love anti-child posts.
No one in their right mind would bring kids into this F'd up planet now.
I- just- I-. I don't know what to say anymore. I think that we truly have the potential to do good and I think the best thing to fix the world is us. It hurts to see how we've given up on ourselves. These posts make me feel like a nuisance to my parents and a nuisance to humanity. I should have avoided this. All I want to do is help, but it seems like the best way to do so is not to have kids. Which I do want.