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50 Times Women Were Put Into Awkward Situations By Men And Called Them Out Online
Dating and relationships are difficult even on a good day. And good days are pretty rare. Unfortunately, that is the reality everyone lives in when navigating the romantic world. Especially women. But at least they have a place to vent.
The subreddit r/FemaleDatingStrategy has 175K members (or as it calls them, queens), constantly discussing their love lives, and that includes all the nonsense that arises too. Continue scrolling and check out what they have to say.
This post may include affiliate links.
Men Only Bringing The Audacity, Yet Again, To The Table!
Took me a sec to realize it, but good going. You have to consider yourself first.
To help you get a better understanding of these posts, Bored Panda got in touch with dating coach, 2 million view TED speaker, and media personality Hayley Quinn. She believes that "dating is different for men and women. However, you'd be wrong to think that one gender has it easy."
"Instead men and women often face equal and opposite problems to one another," Quinn said. "Guys might struggle to think of how to approach a woman, and women (who traditionally and maybe wrongly) have been told they can't make the first move and so panic over where they can find all the guys that want to approach them."
Say It Louder For The People In The Back!!
Poetic Justice
In the world of online dating, Quinn also sees noticeable disparities. "Guys may feel like they're having to move heaven and earth to get one lousy response from a woman, whilst women can feel overwhelmed and harassed by unsuitable suitors," she explained. "Men could usually learn from women that they need to have higher standards for the women they interact with, and women could take a leaf out of men's dating and learn how they too can be proactive."
Some Men Need To Learn This
This goes for everybody. Treat others the way you want to be treated
“Nudes?” He Asked Hopefully
In 2020, the Pew Research Center surveyed Americans to find out more about their love life. While single-and-looking men and women reported equal levels of dissatisfaction with their dating lives and the ease of finding people to date, women were more likely to say they have had some particularly negative experiences.
Most women who were single and looking to date (65%) said they have experienced at least one of six harassing behaviors asked about in the survey from someone they were dating or had been on a date with, such as being touched in a way that made them uncomfortable or rumors being spread about their sexual history.
Oops
When you made an effort and treated her well and when you just stopped.
Stop Normalizing Men’s Immaturity
"Though men might think women have guys queuing up to date them (which sounds great right?) in reality women face plenty of dating challenges," Quinn said. "They may feel emotionally drained by dating, as they push through dates where they don't feel a connection. If they're seeking a relationship they may struggle to tell which guy's going to be in for the long haul, and who will disappear at the first inkling of commitment. They may even not know how to get offline and actually meet men in real life; and get stuck in the belief that all the 'good men' have run out, and it's impossible to meet someone."
The dating coach added that women also face significantly more judgement around things like their age, which can be a challenge on dating apps; and more scrutiny for expressing their sexuality. "So don't think that just because she's got a queue of potential suitors that she's not having a hard time dating."
We all can be douches to one another. Let's not.
That Really Puts It In Perspective
And it's always on us, don't dress that way, don't walk there, don't provoke. When it happens we didn't fight enough, fought too hard, didn't say no, didn't mean it when we said it. If we report it we get blamed, re traumatized by questions and rape kits that are then left untouched, called liars.
Lol
Agree entirely and this is one of the reasons I hate Disney movies
Shrug
100% True For Me
I feel a drop off interest on men (thanks a lot) when I say my husband is a police officer or a jujitsu master.
A Queen Grandmama
Cracks Me Up Every Time
At least Asian men know how to properly wash their ass and aren't leaving skidmarks on the sheets.
Too much generalization. How many western men say that exactly and how many Asian men groom well. You can't fight stereotypes with stereotypes
As a woman in her late 30s who had to navigate the dating apps for the past 10 years, I found the number of unkempt men with little to no personal hygiene or care for their appearance alarming. And yes a lot of them looked way older than they should, although I'm sure many lied about their age. Needless to say my current boyfriend is fit, well groomed AND he will occasionally do a clear pore strip with me. Bonus!
I guess most of the good ones are taken by then? The 'projects' are left on the shelf?
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Well, I did marry my Korean prince charming ♡ This is witty indeed, but let's not generalise. Asia is huge, and I've heard the opposite for the cultural mentality of skin care from some other parts of Asia. Likewise, seen many European and American sleek gentlemen who sometimes overdo it with the parfume.
The post isn't a matter of Asian or Caucasian. The poster is talking about two individuals and it's about taking care of themselves and having the right of being masculine. There are a lot of masculinies and only one is toxic - t his that say you're not enough manly if you are clean and beautiful, and also other more dangerous things. Also, being gay isn't an insult. Also, a gay can be masculine, too. Also, same for Asiatics.
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Wow...this is super racist! I'm married to a half Asian guy and even I find you extremely offensive!!
Not completely fair. Asians don't age the same way as Caucasians and it has nothing to do with skin care.
Correct. They also eat much more healthy than your average male, and that has everything to do with how you age. A diet rich with lean protein and vegetables will always trump a meat-heavy diet, junk food and soda.
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I don't know any men who think of asian men this way. It's news to me
Yes, men have the lame idea that women have to "take them as they are" but they choose women who dress, smell and act in an incredibly unnatural way. Hate that double standard!
This one made me laugh because my partners name is Robert and he wears a three piece suit and tie everywhere. He even has a few cravats for on the rare occasions he wants to change it out. He has been like this his whole life. Thank goodness he is opposite to the Rob in this tale.
Pfft. I am white and 40 and I do outdoor work and I’ve been told I look younger and I don’t use all that fancy skin care stuff And I do shower every day.
Just daily cleaning keeps your skin healthy and young looking. Especially if you already have good skin.
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I honestly couldn't care less about this. As long as a guy is clean, that's all that matters. I'm suspicious of any guy who spends more time on his beauty routine than I do. Vanity is a turn-off.
Emmm... is it obligatory to smell like s**t if you are a Robert? Why didn't anybody tell me?
Nah.... Robert Smith even wears make up. Don't know how he smells, though, but he seems groomed.
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I find this post very toxic. One of the few triumphs of western masculinity is breaking the beauty standard. It is something that should be celebrated no chastised. One day I hope women will experience the same freedom.
I think guys with neck beards, socks, sandals and cargo shorts founded facebook
I love how some men do things that will definitely repel women call a well-groomed man “gay” for being well maintained. It’s like it’s gay for women to be attracted to you.
OMG In high school it was the Mexican guys who wore pressed slacks and perfectly white t-shirts, hair always combed and always so clean an good smelling! My brothers friends smelled like the hog farm and manure. That was suppose to sexy... Their cars were spotless and comfortable, not full of cigarette butts and chew containers.
Exactly! Mocking men for basic hygiene and taking care of themselves is ridiculous.
Yes! My dad makes fun of some Asian guys because they look so nice. It infuriates me how racist (and in other ways too) he is!
Still being asked tour ID because you look way younger rocks, I do not care western men think I'm gay just because I take care if myself; I will always keep doing that and indeed respect everyone, especially women around me because I do not need to "prove" myself
I love a clip I saw on youtube when a korean guy asked a russian woman what she thought of korean men. She said that they are more like russian women haha
What's a feminine routine? Taking a bath? Brushing your teeth? The bar is literally on the floor for guys when it comes to hygiene. How is not stinking showering clean clothes sunscreen and brushing your teeth feminine?? And Asian men are smaller bc of their geographical location they do not have a feminine stature. They are larger than the women in their countries. Stop trying to make anything considered feminine a bad thing. It's extremely sexist and homophobic. Don't be so insecure and take a goddam shower and yes you can wash your b******e it's not gay to wash your b******e ffs and it's not womanly not look and smell like s**t
Load More Replies...They Will Always Make “Single Mothers” The Villains To Shift Blame From Male Predators Or Male Parental Child Neglect
Speaks For Itself
Perfect Way To Deal With Their “Jokes”
Be A Hvm In All Aspects Of Life
I always support the allies, reminding them how much I value them.
How Many Of You “Developed” Issues While In A Relationship? I’ll Go First: Depression And Anxiety. Cured As Soon As We Broke Up
Hvm Right There. Take Note Scrotes
Nothing But Truth
i'm just going to assume that most here are Americans, being from denmark myself i have been to parties (in denmark) sitting or standing next to a few women and they end up talking sex good and bad experiances partners and so on and never have i thought anything shaming about them but good for them that they have been curious and learned a few things like one i remember very clearly when trying a**l ALWAYS remember lube and lots of it and take time, most of this shaming comes from bad parenting and trying to be the cool/alpha male, bad boy, and for my part korrect if some guy i knew started to brag about rape i would not shame him he would (maybe) wake up in the hospital at some point.
Where Is The Lie?
Being Decent Isn’t Difficult
Geee I Wonder Why
This Almost Makes Me Want To Redownload Dating Apps To Do The Same!
Even A 35 Yo Man Has These Same Meltdowns But They're The Logical Sex!!!
Watch The Way Men Treat Women They're Not Attracted To
The Message
Mom Praising Son-In-Law For The Bare Minimum
My husband stayed with our kids as infants while I worked. Everyone went on and on about how amazing he was (and he was) but then we switched roles this past year and I hear how “lucky I am to GET to stay home” and how bad they feel he works long hours. B****! I pumped breast milk on the floor of a unisex bathroom while still taking phone calls.
Why Are Males?
Leave Him In The Dust
This Is Why We Can’t Even Trust The “Good” Guys
Keep Your Friends Safe!
Used Or New, We Will Run You Over
Please tell me he is a virgin too. Ask for what you can also offer.
Thoughts?
If I ever actually find somebody I'd want to marry I would never propose with anybody around. I would want to eliminate any peer pressure and create an intimate environment
Instead Of Holding Rapists/Harassers Accountable, He Mocks Women For Trying To Protect Themselves. A True Pos
Henry Viii's Wives If They'd Never Met Him
Thought This Belongs Here. (From Selfawarewolves... Men Are So Close, I Can't Decide If They're Ignorant On Purpose Or Genuinely Can't Grasp Basic Concepts)
Sounds like the guy who yells "hey pretty lady" and approaches a woman they don't know, and when she "walks fast" to get away or tells him to stop, she has a "bad attitude"
Being In You 20’s Should Be About Self Development, Your Eduction And To Lay The Foundation For Financial Independence
Most Stay-At-Moms Do Not Get The Luxury Of Building A Career, Or Even The Luxury Of A Personal Life This Is How Women End Up In A Financial Trap With No Support
Ummmm... my wife and I support our family. I work long hours. My wife takes care of 90% of the household stuff. I clean the kitchen every night and get home by dinner time every night to have family time with her and our kids. I don't support her and she doesn't support me. We support each other.
Say It Louder For These Predatory Men!
Seriously
helping your wife means that most of the job is on her shoulder. I prefer say that I do my part...
Reminder
We Used To Think We Were Always At Fault
True if you date a self centered douche who doesn't care about your pleasure...
Women Protect Women From Harm. Men Protect Other Men's Ability To Lie, Cheat, And Knowingly Harm Women
I don't know about any 'bro code'. But any friend of mine cheating on his SO (also probably a friend of mine by association) and expecting me to keep it a secret isn't really my friend.
Never Settle For Less Than You Deserve
It Never Ends
*internal Screaming, Forever*
Be That Kind Of Direct, Lol!
Eh, careful with that. There are enough wannabe sugar daddies out there who‘d gladly take you up on that.
Wow
Why do I have trust issues? Being cheated on repeatedly, repeated gaslighting, and emotional manipulation. Oh, and the flat out lying.
Call Their Bluff 2020
Imagine: It’s Your Life
100% Accurate. Never Let It Slide
Women Are 6x More Likely To End Up Divorced If They Are Diagnosed With Cancer Or Ms, Than If Their Male Partners Were Facing The Same Illness
Please Share Stories Of Some Weirdly Specific Rules You Set After *that* One Guy
Never Let Them Get Comfortable!
Can opener in our house. And since I cook from scratch, I don't need it, but he would!
We All Know Why
Ladies, Let’s All Do Our Best To Teach The Next Generation Of Women This. While Sexual Adultification Affects Young Black Women The Most, It Definitely Occurs To Young Women Of All Backgrounds
'compromise!!'
Love A Good Roast
A Trend I've Noticed Among Lvm
If You Catch Feelings Easily, This Might Help! Stay Strong!
Psa: As Soon As Man Says That, Run The Opposite Direction Sis. This Is Red Flag. Manipulation
It Do Be Like That
The first time I met my now husband, I was wearing socks with holes (grew up poor and had been wearing socks with holes my whole life). He teased me about it and then brought me a pair of his own socks to wear :)
Potent
"Women feel like they don't need men anymore" is precisely what went right with this generation!
Facts
I have so much respect for the middle school I attended. All genders took tech class (basically wood shop, with a bit of electronics mixed in) for 9 weeks every school year, and all took home ec where they learned to cook, sew by hand, and eventually use a sewing machine. Skill was not based on gender - it was based on the effort you put in.
Reason #6567 Why Being Single Is Better Than Settling
Exactly
Enough Said
So Glad He Is Her Ex
Made Me Chuckle. Accurate!
Girlfriends/Wives Are Not On The List Of In-Network Therapists
Mic Drop
all things aside, i love to see you're and your used appropriately
This Is Nice But If You’re On A Date At Hooters It’s Already Not Going Well
It's already good enough they have this. Hope in a women's toilet.
My Wish For 2021 And Beyond Is That More Women Realise That They Don’t Have To Put Up With Callous, Selfish Behaviour In Their Relationships
For Real Though
That’s Gonna Be A No From Me
If you read an article like this and think "but it isn't all men, I'm not like that" don't blame women, blame the 40% of men who are ruining it for everyone else, male and female. Also realize that your hurt feelings are nothing compared to a lifetime of fear and being treated as an inferior person or disposable object.
And f*****g SPEAK UP when your male buddies are talking and acting like assholes, douches, perverts, creeps, and potential rapists, and call them out for it. Publicly. Make it socially unacceptable. If they get called out and publicly shamed for it——every single time they try it—-maybe they’ll think twice about doing it again. If they don’t stop, then just drop them as a friend, and go find better quality people to hang out with.
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For the record here, r/FemaleDatingStategy is not a very, uh, liked subereddit because oftentimes there is a lot of things said about men like "who cares if men have mental health problems" and such. I agree with all these screenshots, but the subreddit that the came off of isn't the best. There are a lot of entitled people on there, which is sad because the sub could have been a really positive and supportive place.
I spent all of 5 minutes in that subreddit and saw so much sexist and misandrist crap, I never went back. That sub is utter trash.
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Talking on your phone /texting and wearing earbuds while walking alone is not safe.
They’re often not playing music with those earphones in, and never not keeping their ears and eyes open to their surroundings while on the phone.
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I made a profile on something like tinder. Oh the things I have seen 😅... I said on my profile that I'm bi. This man started with do you f*ck my ex? Well, first who the heck is you're ex and why are you bothering me with this. And that I was probably not because I wouldn't fall for the types of girls that falls for him. He said my attitude is the same as his ex and blocked me 🤣 well, I wonder why girls have an attitude with you 🤔
Oh dear XD. I'm bi too! But that dude was a jerk. (I think I'll just stay away from dating apps).
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If you ask my daughter the way to a man's heart, she'll say "between the 4th and 5th ribs". She'll also tell you what we say to death is "not today"
I hate the fact that men are learning this! All men should know the way women feel! And they should listen to women!
I don't know about you guys, but I'm getting pretty sick of all generalizations and 1-dimensional views about 'men' and 'women'.
If the data backs it up, is it really a generalization? No. No, not really.
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For 17 years I tried my best to set a good example for my daughter on how someone treats someone they love. Her choice for a boyfriend helps me feel that I did a good job.
Imagine that all the time for decades starting from when You're about 11 or 12 and not just from one man but from many - from any. And that would still be a much better than average experience, because like you say, your guy never actually did anything.
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97% of women have been sexually assaulted. It's not "a few affected". It's the majority of women. I'm lucky it isn't me, and I genuinely fear that it will be one day. Ignoring people and being aggressive is how people save their life, perhaps they are happily married and kind, but perhaps this is the day I become the new Sarah Everard. I'm not willing to play russian roulette with 5 bullets in the gun. Men do not get assaulted nearly as much, and it's usually other men that do it. This is not an equal issue. Men's issues exist and should be talked about, but not in order to silence women's. Just as we have BLM, stop asian hate, climate change strikes, me too, and many others, we can talk about men's issues in a way that doesn't damage women's.
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Bored Panda is not a writer, it's a website where everyone can contribute. Nobody is stopping you from writing that post about women assaulting men in kilts. But you don't get to tell other contributors what they should find important to write about.
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But it's not even attacking men, that's what baffles me about this comment section. How is asking a short, ugly man if he has ever asked out a short, ugly woman attacking all men?! You only feel attacked if you have done something from this list, and you only need feel attacked if you haven't learned better and still do this stuff.
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Literally no one is saying we are. All we want is respect, to feel safe, to not be used repeatedly, and not have our lives threatened for telling a man "no".
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As another Gen Xer, I have to disagree. I was harassed both in public and at work. I was groomed by a 29 year old man when I was 16. This has very little to do with what generation you were born into. My guess is you were just lucky.
Load More Replies... Because it's an issue that makes many, many women miserable. It needs to be talked about.
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If you read an article like this and think "but it isn't all men, I'm not like that" don't blame women, blame the 40% of men who are ruining it for everyone else, male and female. Also realize that your hurt feelings are nothing compared to a lifetime of fear and being treated as an inferior person or disposable object.
And f*****g SPEAK UP when your male buddies are talking and acting like assholes, douches, perverts, creeps, and potential rapists, and call them out for it. Publicly. Make it socially unacceptable. If they get called out and publicly shamed for it——every single time they try it—-maybe they’ll think twice about doing it again. If they don’t stop, then just drop them as a friend, and go find better quality people to hang out with.
Load More Replies... For the record here, r/FemaleDatingStategy is not a very, uh, liked subereddit because oftentimes there is a lot of things said about men like "who cares if men have mental health problems" and such. I agree with all these screenshots, but the subreddit that the came off of isn't the best. There are a lot of entitled people on there, which is sad because the sub could have been a really positive and supportive place.
I spent all of 5 minutes in that subreddit and saw so much sexist and misandrist crap, I never went back. That sub is utter trash.
Load More Replies... Talking on your phone /texting and wearing earbuds while walking alone is not safe.
They’re often not playing music with those earphones in, and never not keeping their ears and eyes open to their surroundings while on the phone.
Load More Replies... I made a profile on something like tinder. Oh the things I have seen 😅... I said on my profile that I'm bi. This man started with do you f*ck my ex? Well, first who the heck is you're ex and why are you bothering me with this. And that I was probably not because I wouldn't fall for the types of girls that falls for him. He said my attitude is the same as his ex and blocked me 🤣 well, I wonder why girls have an attitude with you 🤔
Oh dear XD. I'm bi too! But that dude was a jerk. (I think I'll just stay away from dating apps).
Load More Replies... If you ask my daughter the way to a man's heart, she'll say "between the 4th and 5th ribs". She'll also tell you what we say to death is "not today"
I hate the fact that men are learning this! All men should know the way women feel! And they should listen to women!
I don't know about you guys, but I'm getting pretty sick of all generalizations and 1-dimensional views about 'men' and 'women'.
If the data backs it up, is it really a generalization? No. No, not really.
Load More Replies... For 17 years I tried my best to set a good example for my daughter on how someone treats someone they love. Her choice for a boyfriend helps me feel that I did a good job.
Imagine that all the time for decades starting from when You're about 11 or 12 and not just from one man but from many - from any. And that would still be a much better than average experience, because like you say, your guy never actually did anything.
Load More Replies... 97% of women have been sexually assaulted. It's not "a few affected". It's the majority of women. I'm lucky it isn't me, and I genuinely fear that it will be one day. Ignoring people and being aggressive is how people save their life, perhaps they are happily married and kind, but perhaps this is the day I become the new Sarah Everard. I'm not willing to play russian roulette with 5 bullets in the gun. Men do not get assaulted nearly as much, and it's usually other men that do it. This is not an equal issue. Men's issues exist and should be talked about, but not in order to silence women's. Just as we have BLM, stop asian hate, climate change strikes, me too, and many others, we can talk about men's issues in a way that doesn't damage women's.
Load More Replies... Bored Panda is not a writer, it's a website where everyone can contribute. Nobody is stopping you from writing that post about women assaulting men in kilts. But you don't get to tell other contributors what they should find important to write about.
Load More Replies... But it's not even attacking men, that's what baffles me about this comment section. How is asking a short, ugly man if he has ever asked out a short, ugly woman attacking all men?! You only feel attacked if you have done something from this list, and you only need feel attacked if you haven't learned better and still do this stuff.
Load More Replies... Literally no one is saying we are. All we want is respect, to feel safe, to not be used repeatedly, and not have our lives threatened for telling a man "no".
Load More Replies... As another Gen Xer, I have to disagree. I was harassed both in public and at work. I was groomed by a 29 year old man when I was 16. This has very little to do with what generation you were born into. My guess is you were just lucky.
Load More Replies... Because it's an issue that makes many, many women miserable. It needs to be talked about.
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