“Don’t Want To Lose Our Relationship”: GF Refuses Open Relationship, Drama Ensues
Ethical non-monogamy is becoming more and more accepted. People are opening up their relationships, living as throuples, and openly seeking the type of connections that satisfy their needs. This is amazing as it allows people to live authentically as themselves without compromising on their needs.
Of course, it can only work if the people involved are consenting adults that know what they’re getting into and want to participate. Unfortunately, that is not always the case.
In this story, the woman was blindsided by her partner’s suggestion to venture into non-monogamy. She was hurt and her reaction hurt her partner, too. But was there a better way to navigate this situation? Scroll down to read the story and judge it for yourself.
Ethical-non monogamy is becoming more and more popular. However, it is still a tough subject to broach with your partner
Image credits: Alex Green (not the actual photo)
In this story, a boyfriend approached his girlfriend about opening up their relationship. He, obviously, didn’t expect the reaction he got
Image credits: Liza Summer (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Unlucky_Life_7482
The boyfriend might not have handled the conversation correctly
While the woman doesn’t detail how exactly their conversation about an open relationship went down, it might be that there were a lot of questions left unanswered.
When approaching such a touchy subject, one has to explain a lot of things. The boyfriend was supposed to put all his cards on the table and say why he wants to open the relationship. At the same time, he had to be very reassuring that his love and connection to his current partner would not diminish either. He also had to clarify that he did not act upon it yet and define what fidelity would mean to him from now on.
But even if everything is laid out correctly, the partner might still express a lot of hesitation. This is understandable as it’s all completely new information to them.
The ultimatum and the blame that came after is really what ruined it all
The aftermath of the conversation was the place where the boyfriend was supposed to shine. He had to show that he is lenient and try to simply keep the conversation open. Figuring out such things might take a while, after all. His decision to create a strict boundary where it wasn’t before and make an ultimatum right away was a big misstep. No surprise it made his girlfriend recoil from the idea of an open relationship completely.
The blame and manipulation that came after made him even more of a jerk. This is a sign of immaturity that shows that he wasn’t prepared for the open relationship in the first place.
Technically, the couple still has a chance of salvaging the relationship. It will need a lot of honest communication but it’s doable. They might need some help from a therapist but if they wish to do so, they might still stay together. The question is, would either of them want this at this point.
Many agreed that the woman did the right thing, and there was no way she was the jerk in this situation
What else is there to say, other than "safe travels, take care, don't come back"? If she is uncomfortable with it and he insists, he should go. Even if he back paddled I would not be able to trust him, if he tried to force the open relationship before.
Agree, this is just pure manipulation and nothing else. Clearly, he does not love you enough to respect you. So what is the point of continuing any kind of relatiionship with this guy?
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My ex did something like this, he cheated and I found out but stayed because I loved him so he suggested an open relationship. He then got REALLY upset that I was getting all these guys and he wasn't getting any.
With men, they want the double standard. They wanna screw, but can't stand their personal well becoming communal.
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open relationship works for some couples but is not for everyone. if she doesn't want to share then thats that. its not being unreasonable or controlling to expect a normal relationship like it was for the past four years. on the contrary the man giving an ultimatum and then having a tantrum when he doesnt get his way seems way more controlling to me. sooo give him the ultimatum, take the relationship as is or leave it. (on the other hand if he chooses to stay i would never trust him anymore not to cheat since apparently this is very important for him and he feels he has a right to connect with other women).
Yeah, dude doesn't want a genuine open relationship (doubt he could put in the work for one anyway, smh, he seems like the type to only think of his needs, not everyone involved), he's just a controlling toxic user (of people/OP) who wants his cake and eat it too. I feel so sorry for OP..
Load More Replies... What else is there to say, other than "safe travels, take care, don't come back"? If she is uncomfortable with it and he insists, he should go. Even if he back paddled I would not be able to trust him, if he tried to force the open relationship before.
Agree, this is just pure manipulation and nothing else. Clearly, he does not love you enough to respect you. So what is the point of continuing any kind of relatiionship with this guy?
Load More Replies... My ex did something like this, he cheated and I found out but stayed because I loved him so he suggested an open relationship. He then got REALLY upset that I was getting all these guys and he wasn't getting any.
With men, they want the double standard. They wanna screw, but can't stand their personal well becoming communal.
Load More Replies... open relationship works for some couples but is not for everyone. if she doesn't want to share then thats that. its not being unreasonable or controlling to expect a normal relationship like it was for the past four years. on the contrary the man giving an ultimatum and then having a tantrum when he doesnt get his way seems way more controlling to me. sooo give him the ultimatum, take the relationship as is or leave it. (on the other hand if he chooses to stay i would never trust him anymore not to cheat since apparently this is very important for him and he feels he has a right to connect with other women).
Yeah, dude doesn't want a genuine open relationship (doubt he could put in the work for one anyway, smh, he seems like the type to only think of his needs, not everyone involved), he's just a controlling toxic user (of people/OP) who wants his cake and eat it too. I feel so sorry for OP..
Load More Replies...
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