Friends Are "Really Hurt" After Woman Confesses She's Tired Of Talking About Babies
Hanging out with friends is one of those singular joys in life that can’t really be replicated by anything else. But as times change, so do one’s interests, as many people at some point have that horrible realization that perhaps you and your long-term friends no longer have as much in common as before.
A woman decided to tell her friends the truth, that she didn’t want to go on a girl’s trip because the topic of discussion was always marriage and babies. We reached out to the woman who shared the story via private message and will update the article when she gets back to us.
Sometimes, the interests and preferences of a group of friends can change
Image credits: bernardbodo (not the actual image)
One woman decided to skip a girl’s trip because of the constant baby-talk
Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual image)
Image credits: Alena Darmel (not the actual image)
Image credits: Remarkable_Lake410
Having a child or getting married can feel like the most important thing in the world if it’s happening to you
A clear sign of the passage of time is when you start to notice that more and more of your friends use words like “birth specialist” or “fiancé.” Unfortunately, once these kinds of topics take hold, they don’t just disappear overnight. After all, generally, getting married or having a kid isn’t just some fad that comes and goes.
This is by no means bad, if you are having a child soon, it would almost be strange to not talk about it, particularly with others in a similar situation. This is also just as true for someone who is getting married. However, like many new parents posing a constant stream of baby pictures online, some folks really overestimate just how much (or little) the rest of us care.
The real issue here isn’t that the woman doesn’t want to talk about babies all trip, it’s that her friends can’t seem to understand her side of it. If we take a step back, it’s important to remember that a core part of any friendship is honesty and communication. If your friends of eight years can’t handle you not wanting to talk about babies, that is a bit strange. It’s not a roommate situation, where a conflict-averse person often suffers in silence, after all.
After all, the woman didn’t decide to attend and bar any conversation she didn’t like, she took the significantly more mature route and decided to remove herself. It is telling that she seems to have known her preferences would not go over well, as initially she didn’t even give a reason for not attending. There are reasons to not be entirely honest, even with friends, but this should not have been as big a deal.
Image credits: Antoni Shkraba (not the actual image)
Sometimes people think their lives are more interesting than they really are
It’s also important to note that she wasn’t just going solely because of the baby talk, as she wrote that the trip was a sizable expense. Even if it’s affordable, most of us don’t enjoy spending money on experiences we do not actually like. Unless you are a picky eater, you can probably finish most meals you’ve ever been served, but you wouldn’t exactly go out of your way to reserve a table at a restaurant and pay good money for it.
It’s easy to see how the pregnant friend might be offended by this, as it’s something one can take the wrong way pretty easily. However, this all raises the question, if these women had been friends so long, why couldn’t they see eye to eye on what isn’t actually that big of an issue? Generally, if your friend says that some place makes them feel bad about themselves, you wouldn’t think twice about telling them not to go.
Fortunately, as the woman shared in the update, this one issue did not end up being the reason for some sort of split in the friend group. All in all, examples like this can serve as a reminder that the things which seem vitally important to us might be boring or even downright annoying for others. Sometimes you can’t expect the world to bend over backwards to be as excited as you.
Image credits: Tim Douglas (not the actual image)
Most readers thought she was right to be honest
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I get the whole thing about people who talk about nothing but their kids, marriage, SO, etc but these people need to realize there are other things in life besides your kids. Not everyone wants to hear what "amazing" thing they did. You did have a life before kids.
A life, goals, hobbies, and myriad interests that have nothing to do with men, dating, marriage, and babies. How tunnel-visioned a life some people lead, who only talk about dating, marriage, kids, and mortgages, and never ever talk about art, music, hobbies, current events, sports, politics, life, travel, etc, etc, etc. How small their worlds have become. I would starve to death on that diet, and crave deeper discussions with friends than listening to them drone on and on about their breastfeeding plans.
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"It's an expensive way to feel bad about myself." That is reason enough not to go!
But she doesn’t feel bad about herself. She’s happy not having kids. She just doesn’t want to listen to days of conversations that don’t involve or interest her.
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I think you are to be complimented on how you handled this situation. You are right: you are at a different stage in life and therefore your interests differ from those of your friends. That's very natural and your friends should acknowledge that because it's clear as day. Perhaps your friends are afraid they 'lose' you to that other life you live now?
I get the whole thing about people who talk about nothing but their kids, marriage, SO, etc but these people need to realize there are other things in life besides your kids. Not everyone wants to hear what "amazing" thing they did. You did have a life before kids.
A life, goals, hobbies, and myriad interests that have nothing to do with men, dating, marriage, and babies. How tunnel-visioned a life some people lead, who only talk about dating, marriage, kids, and mortgages, and never ever talk about art, music, hobbies, current events, sports, politics, life, travel, etc, etc, etc. How small their worlds have become. I would starve to death on that diet, and crave deeper discussions with friends than listening to them drone on and on about their breastfeeding plans.
Load More Replies... "It's an expensive way to feel bad about myself." That is reason enough not to go!
But she doesn’t feel bad about herself. She’s happy not having kids. She just doesn’t want to listen to days of conversations that don’t involve or interest her.
Load More Replies... I think you are to be complimented on how you handled this situation. You are right: you are at a different stage in life and therefore your interests differ from those of your friends. That's very natural and your friends should acknowledge that because it's clear as day. Perhaps your friends are afraid they 'lose' you to that other life you live now?
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