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“It Gets Better”: 30 Lies People In This Online Group Convinced Themselves To Believe In To Feel Better About Life
Unfortunately (or not), life isn't always rainbows and butterflies. Being alive inevitably means getting used to stuff not turning out quite the way we planned, misfortune happening for no particular reason, losing loved ones, getting lost, and plenty of other things most of us aren't that thrilled about. However, that "getting used to" and accepting reality for what it is has its challenges.
Recently, Reddit user mynameisnotbecky1 asked fellow community members "What is an untruth people tell themselves to feel better about life or the world they live in?" The post received quite a bit of attention and, as of now, has over 13k answers and almost 30k upvotes. With that being said, Bored Panda invites you to look through some of the best comments we managed to find.
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There's a few but the main one I tell myself if that the people who hurt me are also hurting. As a kid I thought people bullied each other because their lives sucked, and then I realized my life also sucked and I didn't treat other people like that so what was their excuse
"looks don't matter"
I've noticed that this is generally said by attractive people, and people who have never struggled in dating
I believe looks matter as a first impression for sure!! We are all attracted by the looks at first we can't help it cause we don't know anything about the other person! But wait until that extremely good looking person opens the mouth and says: "well, i don't really believe in vaccines and this staff"
People always get what's coming to them.
The reality is that sometimes the people who tormented you all those years ago are likely living pretty good lives.
Yeah, I don't really believe in karma. If there was karma, how come so many really good people get screwed?
Money can’t buy happiness.
Don’t have a house, job, and are starving? Don’t worry, just because you’re poor, doesn’t mean that having a mansion, 5 course meals, or a six digit salary will make you happier!
A positive attitude will make you physically better. As a chick with cancer, I get the “just have the positive attitude” advice a lot … which always irked me. No one who feels like c**p wants to fake a positive mindset to make others feel better. My fave response to someone telling me that (again) was actually from a nurse in the room who said: “Please! I’m seen a whole lot of true b****es survive cancer.” That nurse is forever my hero.
Toxic positivity diminishes the seriousness and weight of whatever your going through.
There is someone out there for everyone. Not everyone finds their partner, there is no rule love must follow.
"If I only get this over with , everything is going to be easy!"
Life never runs out of waves to shake you. But while it isn't easy, you do learn to surf better.
Im not an alcoholic , it's not an addiction i can stop whenever i want .. it's just party , birthday, Wednesday or whatever i earned this one and next one !
being like that for 22 years, coming from heavily alcoholic home , sobered up few years ago and it was by far best decision of my life !
"I am going to tell/live MY truth." Your truth is just an excuse for your actions just or not. It's not the objective truth.
Everything happens for a reason
Ugh. I hate this one so much. Same as “it’s gods plan” Like it was Gods plan for children to be molested? Or Oopsie, His bad, the Holocaust didn’t go as planned? What is the reason for horrible things to happen to innocent lives?
“If I fall asleep right now I’ll get X-hours of sleep.”
You’re gonna be awake for a while, honey.
This is so me. I just want more than 3 hours of uninterrupted sleep at night. Brain, please, just stop and let me sleep!
That there used to be "The good ole days" when in fact there never was.
Crime doesn’t pay. I know someone that embezzled over $1 million and got probation and has to pay back less than 10% restitution
Religion does more good than bad
Religion is both the reason and the excuse for just about every war that has been fought.
I believe that every single person (me included) think that they are a bit smarter than what they truly are.
Wisdom comes with age.
I have encountered SO many people old enough to be my mum or dad but who act like they're thirteen.
Wisdom comes with education and I don't necessarily mean university of course
Knowledge comes with education. Experience and knowledge can lead to wisdom but only if you know how to apply the first two. People don't always manage that.
Load More Replies...The only wisdom that has come with my age (I’m 60) is that I know enough to know that I don’t know anything at all. All I can do is make suggestions based on my same or similar experience—-though my experience was in a very different context (age, time, etc). At least I’m self-aware enough to realize it.
I just turned 70 and could feel knowledge being loaded into my brain. Stuff I really could have used when I was younger, lol.
I have to disagree. Wisdom DOES come with age, even the thickest of idiots will gain some wisdom as they age. BUT everything is relative, the starting point is relative and so is the "wisdom" you gain as you age.
Yeah, this. "Wisdom" doesn't necessarily mean intelligence or education. But age does give you hindsight and the ability to look at young people and remember your own life and thoughts at that age. It gives you the ability to sit back and smile and remember your own silly dreams and the idiotic believe that you're the center of the universe and that you're indestructable and that you're of course always right and smarter than your parents. When you reach older age, you know that's just bullshit. THAT is what I consider "wisdom" to mean in that context. But yes - everything is relative, and if you start your life with the wisdom of minus 20, at the age of 200 you might not even have reached 0 ;-)
Load More Replies...When my dad turned 60 I said now you're old and wise what do you know? He said I know that when I was younger I didn't know everything even though I thought I did.
No, Experience comes with age (usually because there was no wisdom)
Back tens of thousands of years when being stupid/ignorant would get you killed by nature really quick, yes. Now a days... not so much.
Wisdom mostly comes with age (if it comes at all) because of the many experiences you make in a long life. However, there are old people who have stubbornly refused all their life to broaden their horizon and therefore have not gained much wisdom. On the other hand, there are some young people who have already been born with a deeper understanding or more awareness, who show a kind of wisdom that is unusual for their age. Therefore, not everybody who is old is automatically wise and somebody who is still young can show a surprising amount of wisdom.
Not sure wisdom is the right term...I have known too many aged idiots. I think, perhaps, perspective, if it comes at all, will only come after you have some years behind you.
Dementia comes with age. It's a broad spectrum. Where you are on it is the question.
Not necessarily. There are plenty of people out there who are my age, & good dog! Don't listen to them. But there are those of us who have been really through it, who have paid attention. We've thought & learned from it. We've made our share of mistakes & tried to learn from them. That's where "wisdom" comes from. But know this. "Newflash" younger generations! At some point, in some way you will turn into us😱. But those raised by $h!++y parents not turn into them. What I mean is at some point something will come out of your mouth & you will remember "Oh no! I sound just like my mother/father!" You WILL at some point be telling your kids it's because you said so. You will look back at your idealism from a standpoint of having been being hit with reality. Just please remember, thank God for your idealism. But thank God for that same idealism you will see in the younger generation. Hopefully their reality will be better than what you hit.
I don't agree with this. Wisdom comes with keeping an open mind and educating yourself while being also open to other opinions. If your stubborn and close minded...you won't get far.
Wisdom, gained by experiences, indeed comes with age. It's just that not everyone has it just because they are older
When I was young I thought after 40 I will be so smart and always know what to say. I am 49 now and I still have no clue.
The notion that all old people are interesting and wise is another one. I work with old people and this is not true.
I have relatives who no matter how many times their children point out their cruelty or disrespect never change. My own mother when us kids tried to speak with her about the way she treated us would start to scream and say she didn't want to hear it. Or go on the attack and start flinging insults at us. Such as Yea what about you. You do this and that. She is now 85 and is the same narcissist she was when I was 10. She used to make me feel angry and now I just feel so sorry for her. What a sad life.
Sadly you cannot force another person to accept your viewpoint if they don't want to. People have to be ready and prepared to listen - even then it does not mean they will agree. Experience has taught you that she won't listen. Wisdom arrived when you accepted that and ceased trying to make her. Hopefully peace followed with that acceptance. You can only ever change how you handle or view things, never others.
Load More Replies...Dementia and being set in one's ways come with old age. Wisdom is not automatic.
Wisdom does come with age. To some far better than others (I have two parents who can outright prove this and - big shock - the wise one knows he’s wise, the not quite right one has no bloody idea.)
Wisdom comes from knowledge and experience. These things take time to acquire. That's the only reason age is a factor. Age doesn't, in itself, bestow wisdom.
Load More Replies...A millenial posted this; your brain isn't fully developed till 25. You don't Get experience from 20 mins of doing something, you get experience from YEARS of doing something.
They said wisdom, not experience. By most cut offs the millennials are all 25+ now, so maybe not the generation you were looking for?. And wisdom CAN come with age, but it doesn't for everyone. And yes, a millennial posted this.
Load More Replies... It gets better.
10 years later and you still tell yourself that.
That the majority of people have a good soul and a good heart.
I tell myself this all the time. I’m constantly proven wrong. In reality, the majority of people are selfish and unkind, especially when it comes to other people.
If that were truly the case civilisation would not have survived. The margin may be small, but on balance more people have to be altruistic in order for society to function. Yes, everyone is selfish, but that doesn't mean everyone is unkind. If everyone, *everyone* you meet is unkind, either you are (sub) consciously only remembering the unkind and forgetting the kind, or at worst neutral, OR the common factor is you.
I just saw Dear Evan Hansen. It's way off base when it comes to mental illness and personality disorders, but it comes as no surprise that it was such a hit on Broadway. It leans heavily on all the myths people want to believe. The truth is that reaching out to your family or friends often doesn't help because they have no idea how to help you or might even be partly responsible for your trauma. For some people, depression and anxiety are intractable even with the best possible treatment. Some people are constitutionally incapable of empathy and will always harm those around them
The thruth is that most pwople dont even make the effort or want to help. Most dont want to be around unsuccessful, ill or depresed people because they get uncomfortable. They shut us up with toxic positivity (you have so many options, others have it worse), indiference, attacks (you are being too begative) or they simply leave you
If you just work hard it’ll all work out in end
No it doesn't. I'm so glad for the uprise of workers not just settling. We need to remember to work to live, not live to work.
That the good times we have now --cheap and available gasoline, food in abundance, even pleasant weather-- can continue indefinitely. We will run out of Nitrogen for crop growth, we will exhaust the available crude oil, climate change will catch up with us. Our grandkids will not have the plentiful resources we have enjoyed for decades, period.
For adults specifically: doing your best = success. Don’t get me wrong, doing your best is something to be proud of, but doing your best without preparation/dedication/practice leads to nowhere
Doing your best=somewhere better than where you're at now, even if it's just by 0.001%*
I live for my loved ones. I lost my wife during childbirth and 4 months later my daughter passed away from a heart condition that was inoperable
That the world is just. Karma is a b***h. What’s coming to them. Etc.
“There is light at the end of the tunnel”. Life is the journey inside that tunnel. Sometimes that journey gets hard, other times it gets easier, but we will never reach that light. The idea of a perfect place does not exist, because life itself is not perfect as we always have something to complain about.
God has a plan
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Save the best for last. You might end up filling up your stomach or depleting your energy to the limit before you get to your favourite thing.
Good things come to those who wait. Or that if something's not working out right now, it's because something better is in the works for you. Didn't get the job you really wanted? Something better is coming along! Didn't work out with your partner? Something better is coming along! There are no guarantees in life. Sometimes things work out the way you want them to, and sometimes they don't. There's peace in accepting that.
Everybody wants to feel good about themselves and their lives and it can be really hard. I think younger people are really self-critical and hard on themselves and that makes me sad. They are living in one of the most economically and politically challenging worlds we've ever had and a lot of older people do nothing but piss on them. Celebrate all your small wins and small achievements. Start there. Brushed your hair today? Tick. Showered? Tick. Cleaned teeth? Tick. Said something nice to another human being? Tick. Finished a chore. Tick. Paid a bill. Tick. Faced a messy cupboard and sorted part of it. Tick. Did something nice for yourself. Tick. This stuff REALLY matters and you can love on yourself regardless of what anyone else thinks.
#1 "If I post on reddit I will be automatically smart and socially relevant."
Obese people me they're happy wth their weight/looks. I'm not, I was never, it sucks on every level and I don't believe you. Change is just too hard for you.
They deserve that money. Their loved one was murdered by a (so-called) public servant on camera. We *all* watched him die. We *all* are a part of the system that allowed it to happen. We f*****g owe them something that cannot ever be repaid.
Load More Replies...Save the best for last. You might end up filling up your stomach or depleting your energy to the limit before you get to your favourite thing.
Good things come to those who wait. Or that if something's not working out right now, it's because something better is in the works for you. Didn't get the job you really wanted? Something better is coming along! Didn't work out with your partner? Something better is coming along! There are no guarantees in life. Sometimes things work out the way you want them to, and sometimes they don't. There's peace in accepting that.
Everybody wants to feel good about themselves and their lives and it can be really hard. I think younger people are really self-critical and hard on themselves and that makes me sad. They are living in one of the most economically and politically challenging worlds we've ever had and a lot of older people do nothing but piss on them. Celebrate all your small wins and small achievements. Start there. Brushed your hair today? Tick. Showered? Tick. Cleaned teeth? Tick. Said something nice to another human being? Tick. Finished a chore. Tick. Paid a bill. Tick. Faced a messy cupboard and sorted part of it. Tick. Did something nice for yourself. Tick. This stuff REALLY matters and you can love on yourself regardless of what anyone else thinks.
#1 "If I post on reddit I will be automatically smart and socially relevant."
Obese people me they're happy wth their weight/looks. I'm not, I was never, it sucks on every level and I don't believe you. Change is just too hard for you.
They deserve that money. Their loved one was murdered by a (so-called) public servant on camera. We *all* watched him die. We *all* are a part of the system that allowed it to happen. We f*****g owe them something that cannot ever be repaid.
Load More Replies...