Cold truths are hard to swallow for a reason. They strip us of the illusion that everything’s in our control and that we know things best. But in reality, that’s not how things work, and who likes to be told that?!

What’s a truth no one wants to hear?” wondered Redditor u/grubbseuph11 on r/AskReddit and people shared some illuminating and brutally honest responses, like the hard-to-digest fact that “friends will come and go,” and that “no matter how likeable you may be, there are always going to be certain people who don't like you, sometimes for no particular reason.”

So let’s get ready to be hit by a cold shower that should make you rethink this whole perspective on our lives, and be sure to check out our previous post with more hard truths right here.

#1

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them You aren’t a hero or even a good person just because you’re in the military

SouthwestTraveller , Diego González Report

Natalia Shoemark
Community Member
1 week ago

American brain washing... "thank you for your service"... I mean, yes, thank you! But war needs to be feared not celebrated!

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#2

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them Time doesn't heal wounds, it builds scar tissue.

tehrealdirtydan , seyfettin dincturk Report

Sapna Sarfare
Community Member
1 week ago

profound truth

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#3

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them You are much closer to being poor and homeless than you are to being super rich

fckboris , Shail Sharma Report

Serial pacifist
Community Member
1 week ago

Also, I am closer to being a long-term BP commentator than a long-term professional writer 🤷‍♀️

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In order to find out why exactly it's so hard to swallow a hard truth, and how we should react to it, Bored Panda spoke with Susan Petang, a certified divorce coach and the creator of “The Quiet Zone Coaching,” who teaches women how to stop feeling overwhelmed and start waking up happy in the morning again.

“When we develop close relationships, we expect those people to be gentle with us, not hurt us,” said Susan explaining why hard truths are not pleasant to hear. “When they offer up a hard truth, it violates the expectation that the person isn't going to cause us pain. We want them to love and encourage us—but we don't always realize that a hard truth is being given to us with love and encouragement, with our best interests in mind.”

#4

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them Bad people don’t always “get what they deserve”.

EmbarrassedCar7457 , Abbat Report

Lyone Fein
Community Member
1 week ago

And neither do good people.

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#5

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them Not all babies are cute.

616abc517 , Ryan Franco Report

Cactus McCoy
Community Member
1 week ago

All non-human babies are, for some reason.

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#6

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them “I don't know” is a perfectly valid answer to many questions.

TheBrassDancer , Andrew Neel Report

Tim Pillinger
Community Member
1 week ago

I have a professional qualification where you have to have said "sorry, I can't answer that question" to qualify. My boss primed the customer to ask something silly.

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“Often, what someone else calls a ‘hard truth’ we call ‘criticism,’” she said. “If a criticism is true, we can agree and apologize, then work to make it right—or we can ignore and deflect it if it isn't true.”

Moreover, Susan said that when someone we care about delivers a hard truth, we should take that opinion more seriously, because this is a person whose opinion we trust. “I advise my clients to think about the intention behind the message. If the intention is to help us, prevent us from making a mistake, or intervene before we get hurt, it's worthwhile to consider.”

#7

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose. That is not weakness, that is life.

MayaButtreeks1985 , Adrian Swancar Report

Lauren Caswell
Community Member
1 week ago (edited)

Mistakes are unavoidable. Failure is unavoidable. We cannot run from it and need to stop being so afraid, because it's ok to not get everything right all the time, and like this says, sometimes it's out if your control

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#8

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them Some people are bad parents.

Being funny or smart doesn’t mean you’re ready to take care if a human being (maybe even multiple) for a good chunk of your life.

Please don’t get kids to fix a relationship either, I’ve seen this too much and it doesn’t work.

UwU_was_ist_das , Alberto Casetta Report

Rick
Community Member
1 week ago

I don’t have kids and don’t want them and it’s simply because I don’t want to spend all of my adult life looking after and raising a child, I just want to live my own and not worry about that.

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#9

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them Most people genuinely do not care about you or your opinions, which is just fine

Klaus_Heisler87 , LinkedIn Sales Solutions Report

Rick
Community Member
1 week ago

Unfortunately, social media has made a lot of people forget this rule.

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Susan advises asking yourself if the "hard truth" is really true. “Be brutally honest with yourself—remember why your loved one brought it up to you in the first place!”

“It's beneficial to hear a hard truth when we're hurting someone else, hurting ourselves, or not being true to our values,” she explained and added: “So situations that look like that would be drug/alcohol abuse, spousal abuse, child abuse, bad financial or career decisions, or dating someone married if you're religious.”

#10

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them No matter how likeable you may be, there are always going to be certain people who don't like you, sometimes for no particular reason.

DeathSpiral321 , Jorge Saavedra Report

troufaki13
Community Member
1 week ago

You don't like everyone, so don't expect everyone to like you.

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#11

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them Life will never be exactly like it was before the pandemic started.

SchteeveFour , Mauro Lima Report

Gelato Cat
Community Member
1 week ago

After the 1918 influenza epidemic came the roaring 20's which was revolutionary for both the arts and society, a similar thing happened with the renaissance, so who knows, maybe it will never be the same again for the better ( for those who have lost jobs/loved ones to Covid i am not minimising ur suffering)

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#12

Most people shouldn’t have kids.

Swedish-Butt-Whistle Report

Andy Acceber
Community Member
1 week ago

When you look at the impact of 7 billion humans at a time on the surface of the planet, yeah. This is probably true.

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#13

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them Having a University degree doesn't guarantee you a job

PripyatHorse , Abby Thompson Report

Jonathan
Community Member
1 week ago

Nepotism is the guarantee of a job.

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#14

You can't run from yourself. Moving towns, cities or even countries won't automatically change who you are

MD564 Report

JuJu
Community Member
1 week ago

This should be way higher. It's important to be at peace with yourself otherwise you will never be happy.

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#15

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them Friends will come and go. You will have many friends who one day you will never see again.

Realitycheck-4u , Matheus Ferrero Report

K. Lange
Community Member
1 week ago

and you will often learn it the hard way: when you would need them the most - they will disappear.

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#16

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them You are the main character in your life but you're just an extra in everone else's

Accomplished-Bee4700 , Robert McGowan Report

Tim Pillinger
Community Member
1 week ago

No. You're part of the main cast for some.

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#17

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them It's nice to be important but it's more important to be nice.

RepresentativeWay734 , Brooke Cagle Report

Lauren Caswell
Community Member
1 week ago

Niceness, kindness, small random acts, these are one of the things I love about life. Even if they are few and far between. And doing them always feels good so it's a win win ^-^

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#18

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them Climate change is an exponential curve and we are entering the shoulder. Natural disasters are expected to increase 8x in the next couple decades. It gets worse after that.

gandhikahn , Chris Gallagher Report

kristina law
Community Member
1 week ago (edited)

I live in Phoenix, where 200 people move to every single day. Also, where it will be uninhabitable within 20 years because of the rise in temperatures. Don't move here.

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#19

It just takes a second to destroy what has taken years or even centuries to make.

dexterhines Report

TheBlackPanda (JustABlackBear)
Community Member
1 week ago

Very true

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#20

The world is 100% being run by corruption.

FrostFurnace Report

Andy Acceber
Community Member
1 week ago

I read this as "corporation," doubted it, then realized that was probably true too.

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#21

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them War can come to your doorstep, everything can change. No country is immune. History clearly demonstrates this.

SchteeveFour , UX Gun Report

Natalia Shoemark
Community Member
1 week ago

Just like covid.. would never have imagined lockdowns precovid

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#22

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them Not everything happens "for a reason" or because of something you have (or have not) done.

Sometimes, things in life and the Universe go sideways and it's just your time to be caught in the crossfire.

Emcee_Such_N_Such , Ryoji Iwata Report

Burs
Community Member
1 week ago

And please do not go to people in a bad situation and tell them that x “happened for a reason”. It doesn’t matter what you believe. Telling them that their mum just died, they lost they lost their job or they are severely ill “for a reason” is extremely invalidating and rude.

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#23

All your bones are wet right now

Toren8002 Report

Tim Pillinger
Community Member
1 week ago

And that's a good thing.

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#24

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them If you don’t take care of your teeth when you’re young, you’ll regret it when you’re old. Brush twice a day, goddamnit.

toothfixingfiend , Diana Polekhina Report

Elmie Pumpkinbush
Community Member
1 week ago

Some people have good teeth, some don't. The amount of brushing has a marginal effect.

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#25

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them If you’re chasing a romance or friendship… the other person doesn’t want to be with you.

Magicman2444 , Toa Heftiba Report

Burs
Community Member
1 week ago

Never chase a person

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#26

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them You’re not special… but that’s okay because everyone is not special together.

BeechballMusic , Мария Волк Report

Kari Panda
Community Member
1 week ago

I wish we‘d teach that more. So many peope think they’re special and thus believe they’re entitled to something. You and your wishes/opinions/needs definitely matter, but so do those of everyone else.

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#27

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them There's no "health in every size". If you're over/under certain weight limit, you have a higher risk in getting sick. There's no "but-".

cleanbroom , i yunmai Report

NsG
Community Member
1 week ago (edited)

I wish more people understood the concept of "risk". You can totally be 20lb over weight and still be healthy RIGHT NOW. All it means is that you are gambling that you will be healthy tomorrow or next week or next year. It is also not a guarantee. If there is a risk factor that one in ten overweight men will have a heart attack, and you gather nine of your overweight friends you cannot say with complete accuracy which one of you it will be. It is a gamble - some people are happy to gamble, and accept the fact they may lose. But there's a difference between knowing it's a possibility and being scared into thinking it's a certainty.

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#28

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them The odds that you die tomorrow is wayyy higher than winning on that lottery ticket.

Swiftzword , Erik Mclean Report

Serial pacifist
Community Member
1 week ago

You are saying that we should bet on us dying tomorrow?

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#29

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them People will hurt you

vojili , Joshua Rawson-Harris Report

Adam C
Community Member
1 week ago (edited)

Even your own family

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#30

You can't make someone love you if they don't

krazekrittermom Report

Scagsy
Community Member
1 week ago

This is a terrible movie trope. Keep pestering and chasing and eventually the other person will fall madly in love with you. Sorry, but it doesn't work like that. You will go to prison for stalking and may find yourself on the receiving end of somebody else's love. You don't want that. You really don't want that.

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#31

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them You won’t be young and beautiful forever.

mtn4444 Report

K. Lange
Community Member
1 week ago

that you are getting older doesn't automatically mean that you won't be beautyful anymore. The beauty just changes.

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#32

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them That you need to stop procrastinating and get that thing you've been needing to do done already.

PikaBirb44 , Annie Spratt Report

Rick
Community Member
1 week ago

Unless it’s murder.

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#33

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them Your boyfriend/husband is always going to find other women attractive.

Milkie444 , Caleb George Report

Gelato Cat
Community Member
1 week ago

Ur partner will always find other people attractive ( weather they're bf/gf doesn't matter )

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#34

We’ll eventually be alone, so it’s either being comfortable with ourselves or being tormented by loneliness later in life

yuhuhuhuhuhu Report

Caro Caro
Community Member
1 week ago

A hard lesson to have to go through. Loneliness is tough but loneliness in old age is not only tough but detrimental for your health too.

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#35

Staying with someone who cheated on you is never a good idea

bluemorphine Report

Andy Acceber
Community Member
1 week ago

Who hurt you, OP, that made you believe this was 100% true for 100% of people 100% of the time? People are complicated. Relationships are complicated. Absolutes about either rarely apply.

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#36

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them Your belly button was your old mouth.

Kairosiris , Ben Hershey Report

Serial pacifist
Community Member
1 week ago

...and, in your pelvis, the coccyx is a small bone of four fused vertebrae that would make up the tail if humans had one.

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#37

There are some people who just are NOT going to like you. And you will have done nothing to deserve, cause or warrant it. Its not your fault.

tehrealdirtydan Report

Luther von Wolfen
Community Member
1 week ago

There will also be people who dislike you because your actions harmed them. You can apologize, but they are not obligated to forgive you.

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#38

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them Life is as much unfair and unjust as it is possible for it to be

BrainCelll , Erik Mclean Report

Tim Pillinger
Community Member
1 week ago

But strive for justice anyway.

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#39

People Share 40 Things That Are True, But No One Wants To Hear Them Oxytocin, the “love hormone”, also increases animosity towards those you regard as “others”

Arcus91 , Zoe Report

jamie1707
Community Member
1 week ago

I'm saying to myself "what bullshait is this?" I was reading that as "Oxycontin".

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#40

It’s not gonna be okay unless you make it okay. I often hear people say: it’s gonna be okay. Well, it’s probably gonna be okay, if you actually put the effort to make it okay. And sometimes, you have to let go, even the big things.

ClassicD*ck Report

Burs
Community Member
1 week ago

No. Many things cannot be fixed and pretending that it’s the persons fault is very cruel. A woman whose son just died is not going to be ok, it’s not her fault.

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