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People Online Are Naming Things Folks Should Stop Glamorizing, And Here Are 36 Spot-On Answers
While it’s OK to fail to see the bigger picture, to not have enough perspective sometimes, cause we’re all human, it’s not OK to let it stay that way.
Needless to say, this can lead people through a dark corridor cause skewed perspectives are always trouble in the long run.
One such path is romanticizing things, which often, if not always, have a very toxic side to them. And this is what people have been discussing this week on Reddit.
Reddit user u/mysteryscallop asked the AskReddit community “what do people need to stop romanticising?” stirring up a comment section of over 18,000 responses and generating 28,100 upvotes with 70 awards in just one day.
We’ve collected some of the best responses from the post and created a curated list of the things people tend to overly glamorize, glorify, romanticize and whatnot below. Check it out, vote, comment, and share your thoughts on what else people tend to romanticize in the comment section!
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“Touching” and “wholesome” situations where people in need have to rely on donations from others to pay for healthcare or other basic needs. Particularly when this happens in a developed country. Go-fund-me’s for hospital bills or teachers paying for kids’ school lunches. And then romanticizing this like it’s something that should be happening. Yuck.
Looking at you, USA. That’s not normal. Sincerely, Scandinavia
OCD. It’s not quirky or funny when I’m late for work because I had to back upstairs to check that the gas stove is off for the fifteenth time because I can’t stop envisioning the whole building blowing up.
I literally stand frozen to the spot trying to fight the urge to go back when I KNOW I CHECKED but the intrusive thoughts are too upset to deal with.
OCD isn’t cute and quirky and being organised. For me its believing that people will die if I don’t check again.
I get so tired of hearing people say that "Oh wow he has OCD? His room must be spotless". Um, no. My son's room is chaotic and he can hardly wash his own hair. But each car/rock/toy/can must be JUST SO. He must lock windows and doors and he worries constantly about his sister. It's not fun. As for his sister, it's her skin. Any bump must be picked off. She literally cannot stop herself from picking and will ask for bandages when she catches herself picking. She knows that she shouldn't make herself bleed but simply cannot stop. I wish people would stop thinking that OCD means perfection. It does not.
Poverty. You read articles like "Hero mom works 3 jobs to pay for the treatment for his sick son"... That's not right, that shouldn't happen
Yes! A moment's rational thought would tell you this is NOT a feel-good headline, it's horrifying. But people DON'T (or don't want to) have a moment's rational thought - they take the superficial happy feeling because it's easy. It's like "thoughts and prayers". The minimum amount of effort to give someone who isn't them any of their attention.
Pretend_Drink5816 said:
Mental illness is a serious condition. Having one does not make you cool, unique, or insightful. It's a disaster.
deja_geek replied:
The people who call ADHD a "superpower" are just flat out wrong. ADHD is super debilitating overall. While there are something we can do better than people who are nerotypical, overall ADHD is extremely hard to manage and often can destroy a person's home life, school and/or career.
I heard of someone who pretended to have depression because it was "cool". I feel like I would've stabbed them. If you want my depression, sure. You can have it. You can also have this fun benefit of wishing you were dead every other week. I'm not going to keep you from the kitchen knives; if you think depression is cool you should be able to handle the side effects. (Apologies, but I needed that out of my system.)
Absolutely NO apologies needed. Everyone needs a release sometimes. I hope you are receiving the support you need. Depression is not a joke, it's not a superpower and it's nothing to be ashamed of. You are so incredibly strong to share your struggles. I wish you all the best.
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I have ADHD, the only 'superpower' I have is being able to make the easy things seem a lot more complicated 🥴. Although I hate calling it an illness. I prefer the term 'condition'. And how I would love for critics to switch places with me just for a day, I've made peace with the fact they will never ever understand how frustrating life and especially their comments can be. 🖖🤷.
My son has ADHD, diagnosed at a young age along with high- functioning autism. On meds for ADHD he does pretty well on his own. He has decided he doesn't want to be "controlled or addicted" to drugs (Ritalin, Concerta, etc). Off meds, he's a train wreck. Forgetting tasks he's done everyday for yrs at his job, major anxiety, depression. Says he feels like he can't talk to people anymore, so he withdraws from social situations. Compared meds to having oxygen recently when I told him some people have to have different meds to function, whether it be for depression, anxiety, ADHD, etc. Had an appt this week to get back on meds🙏
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I’ve been depressed for at least half of my 65 years. Just before I turned 30, I tried to kill myself but had severely underestimated how many pills I’d needed to steal out of other people’s medicine cabinets and ended up spending two weeks in a locked psychiatric ward. It was one of the worst things I’ve ever experienced, and it also turned out to be a good thing in that I learned that I wasn’t just a lame-o who couldn’t get a grip on how life worked. I was diagnosed with Seasonal Affective Disorder and put on medication. For the first couple of decades I went on and off them, but once I needed to take daily thyroid medication, I went back on them and stayed. Mental illness is not something that should be made light of!
I have had ADHD all my life. Sure, sometimes it allows me to do things that normal people find hard, but by and large it has been like carrying a ball and chain with me all my life. Unfortunately, when I was in school if ADD was known at all, it wasn't known by educators.
Marco - what does it allow you to do that others find hard?
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I help someone who is bipolar 2, autistic (Aspergers), panic disorder. It's awful. Really hard to get a job they can do, which has to be working alone; the depression is debilitating and being manic (can't sleep) is the worst! No one wants true mental illness.
My hubby is bipolar 2/ bpd and he cycles frequently. I feel so bad because even though he is very serious about taking his medication and staying on it he still has break through issues with cycles a few times a year. He hates it. I have to take his phone from him when he's manic ti keep him from burning bridges with family members. I'm so sorry you're living through so much adversity!!
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I've always had anxiety and let me tell you...it is anything but glamorous. You want to do things but you physically and mentally can't do it.
I have GAD, and its no fun being rooted to the spot, heart pounding, fight or flight ready to go, but too terrified to move
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ASD and C-PTSD. It both frustrates me that people think mental health conditions are "cool" and horrifies me that noone actually really understands a damn thing about them but they all have "helpful" advice to give when I explain I have a condition.
A related one: To create great art/writing you have to be a tortured soul with crippling depression! No. When I'm depressed my writing doesn't magically get better - in fact it gets significantly worse because I don't have the energy or enthusiasm I need to put in a proper effort. Everything comes out half-assed, when I manage to produce anything at all. I produce my best writing when I'm happy, confident and enthusiastic.
I absolutely hate it when I see TikTokers faking anxiety attacks when they’re really something that is extremely limiting and horrifying to experience. All it does is prevent people who really need help from getting any because people assume they’re faking. The whole thing just makes me sick.
I had a panic attack once because we were at a church where the choir sang so badly that it triggered my misophonia. I had to spend the rest of the day in my room for fear of being too mean to the rest of my family as a side effect. They last the whole day -_-.
Load More Replies... I'm really glad mental illness has become normalized and I'd rather it be seen as cool and trendy than something fearful and have people shun me.
I cannot downvote it enough. I have a diagnosed mental illness and if all the people who rant about the “fakers” would put that same energy into demanding better from governments and employers, I might not be paying $160 per session for therapy and worrying about whether I’ll face discrimination in my next workplace if I need to change jobs. People use struggling teenagers as punching bags but clutched their pearls when a mental health activist spoke harshly about our director-general of health on TV after he (the activist) stayed up all night taking care of a young person who tried to commit suicide.
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ADHD is friggin hard. When my medication wears off, the screaming and tantrums start ( I’m 14, it’s humiliating)
I feel like a lot of people pretend to have a mental illness to get attention. It is sickening
Not to mention that when it comes to mental illness, the medical community (in the USA at least) estimates that as much as 70% of patients are mis-diagnosed to begin with.
Getting older with a mental illness sucks big time. It doesn't get easier over the years. Lots of things make it tougher. I saw what bipolar did to my mom. She was undiagnosed and never got help. My own struggle with it is ongoing and I've recently had to make big changes in my life just to be able to be functional for my wife and son. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
It's also like people saying how strong I am for raising an autistic child. First, I didn't do it on my own..I had a husband that helped. Second, I did what any parent should do and stepped up to the plate. It doesn't help me or my child if I crawl into depression and wait it out. But when the toughest part of raising that child is over, the depression hits you like a ton of bricks.
Get out of the house, long walks in nature and lots of natural daylight will help you deal with the bleekness and raise your vitamine D levels which are almost always low when you suffer from depression. You can't always be the strong one, sometimes you have to realise there's only so much you can do. Allow yourself to take some time to be you too. An off day from all that stepping up to the plate. Do at least one thing you enjoy and that walking, try it, it really works to take your mind of things. I wish you the best and hope you too get the help you need.
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This is so true! Whenever I hear people say things like "I'm so depressed" jokingly and have people laugh it makes me so angry. They likely don't sob in the shower every day or have trouble getting out of bed because they think "what's the point?". They aren't paranoid that everybody is laughing at them and they don't overanalyze one tiny mistake they make. The same goes for OCD, anxiety, eating disorders, etc. I personally have BPD and recovered from bulimia and it shocks me at how insensitive people can be to try to get attention. Mental illness likes to hide, it doesn't jump out and say "here I am! Pay attention to me!"
Yeah, your brain doesn't like showing you or others that it's broken or not doing its job. So it hides itself from sight, making you wonder if you're just a terrible person instead of someone with a mental health disorder.
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I definitely agree with this. However it certainly should not be demonized. The whole neurodiversity thing has been really helpful for me and amazing. Just because something is "normal" or like neurotypicals doesn't mean it's inherently better or what I should experience/do as well.
Damn! People out there romanticising depression? Thats some depressing reality in retrospect...
It’s a dog whistle for “talking about symptoms without sounding ashamed enough”. I’ve carried shame about my diagnosed disorder for longer than some of the “you’re romanticising it!” crowd have been alive, and if others don’t feel that shame, that’s a GOOD thing.
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"Disorder," the D in these acronyms, means the condition prevents healthy functioning. My ex's unmanaged OCD was a huge factor in the demise of our marriage.
Totally true on both accounts. Adhd IS a disability because you are always held to neurotypical standards which you have no hope of meeting because your brain literally does not function that way.
I was diagnosed with bipolar when I was 17. I also have diabetes (not obese - it's hereditary), and if I could get rid of one of them it would be the bipolar. That's all I'm going to say..
ADHD is a blessing and a curse. (I am an ADHDer). It can be a superpower but it can seriously impact your life, negatively. However, I would not call it "super debilitating". FWIW, I am also autistic, so there's that.
As someone who has ADHD, and whose son has ADHD, I don't think it's glorifying it to call it a super power. It's taking something that we struggle with and giving it as much positive energy as we can, BECAUSE we fight with it all day every day. No, it's not fun. Yes, it hurts and it's hard to get though life with it. But when we tell our kids they are amazing, that is the damn truth. The super power is not in having ADHD, but surviving and being the best you can DESPITE ADHD. That is my opinion.
It's not a personality trait or a fun quark. It's life threatening for some.
THIS!! I am going through some tough times with my son right now. He is neurodivergent, has attention deficit (he is not hyper active, just "dreamy"), and he recently was diagnosed with depression. I wish could take all his woes away because he is such an amazing human being. People that pretend to be depressed to get attention make it hard for others to take it seriously for people who are really suffering. 😡
I don't get this. When people started thinking that depression is cool personality trait?
there is a reason why I can't get a girlfriend, and it won't take long for you to guess (hint: what was this commented under?)
If anyone out there thinks depression is "cool," then go ahead, you can have it! Give me your happiness! For years I felt like I wasn't good enough, like no one loved me because no one ever told me they did and I was thrown into foster care, I felt completely empty, I felt everything at once and then nothing at all. All that time, I didn't even know what day it was, nor did I care. All I wanted was to be dead, dead. Bullied, everyday of my life, shook for what I had, and no one cared enough to help me. No. One. Cared. Depression is not a joke. It's not cool. It's not fun. It's a complete, horrible, terrible, empty disaster.
looking at you Gacha kids, with you romanticing murder, rape, depression, suicide, and poverty
Pretty sure that the super power things is for the people who have it, especially children who feel alienated because of having it. Don't be a douche!
I would love to get rid of all my mental illnesses, it's not romantic, never was. It's just ruining my life!
Holy crap this! Anxiety and depression, the delightful one-two punch of my existence! Feeling up to doing stuff today? Great, how many anxiety attacks do I have to contend with if I'm out running errands... not if, but when I get them. Meds make life bearable, and I invite any ass-hat who tells me "it's just in your head" to skinny-dip in the nearest port-a-potty.
THIS. This bothers me so much. I was diagnosed by a health professional(let me stress the health professional part, this was no self diagnosis) with severe anxiety disorder and major depression when I was only 11. I had a mental breakdown, was su*cidal, until my parents realized what was going on, got me help, and Im on meds now. I hate hate HATE it when I see these kids online saying stuff in their bios like "✨depressed✨" or writing comments like "omg, I'm so OCD 😩." Or they will be chatting with some other kid and say something like "Im literally having a panic attack right now, I think Im going to (end it all)." and then some other kid is like "no please dont do that, your life is so meaningful, don't do it" and then, having received the attention that they wanted, the kid is like "o-okay, I, I won't do it, I guess 🥺" (with this beautiful fake stutter thrown in for, ya know, dramatic effect). And when you talk like that I know you are faking cause who actually talks like that unless
you are trying to get attention, and also, if someone is really trying to end it all, a one liner about how meaningful your life is not going to make them all happy again in an instant(these kids will literally say stuff like "I feel so much better now" after someone gives them attention, like all their "depression" went away because someone said one sentence to them about the meaning of life). Believe me, I've felt su*cidal before and that is most definitely not how it works. Im not talking about kids who actually have real mental health problems, I'm not saying all kids are liars when they say they struggle with mental health. Im just saying that there is a ton of fakers out there and it's real easy to identify them, and whenever I read their comments, it feels like a slap in the face to myself and other kids(and adults!) like me who actually have to deal with the real thing and know mental illness for what it is - not cute and quirky, but ugly, messy, painful, and self-destructing.
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I think part of the problem is that we calls so many things "mental illness". Mental illnesses are as different as parts of the body, the arm, the eye, the foot, the finger. Yes, having dysfunction in one of those body parts is a problem, but the problem is completely different depending on the body part affected. So it is with mental illnesses. Biopolar disorder is not schizophrenia is not OCD is not dysthymia, is not sociopathy. Mental illness is one of hundreds of specific issues of brain dysfunction. We need education, not memes.
I agree with mental health not being seen as 'trendy' but everyone I've heard describe ADHD as a superpower has been people who also have ADHD. I think the idea is to take some ownership and power from the disability. By focusing on the silver lining, it's a bit easier to deal with. I think that is perfectly fine
Hi have ADHD and major depression. It is difficult to manage everything. But I do because I have to and I just want to feel normal.
This!!! This, and this again. Because of my debilitating anxiety I have almost lost my job, and still can, it makes me forgetful, miss certain things, it's an absolute disaster
Having ADHD is like having the mind from hunter-gatherer times in the time of agriculture: it just doesn't fit right. But because of this many ADHDs are very good in more risky job than firefighters, but don't fit as good in classic 9to5 Jobs - or in school as children.
I read some time back that of UK weirdos, if you're an aristocrat, you're 'eccentric', otherwize you're just plain nutz. Worldwide, how many aristos are institutionalized for valid, non-political reasons?
We wouldn't know the number because those with money keep this secret.
Load More Replies... It’s on trend to talk about a negative trait and call yourself amazing and awesome for having it as a way to compensate how the world shîts on you for it. Like mental illness, disability, weight, parenting status etc.
Oh my f*****g god so many people nowadays fake ADHD, Anxiety, Depression AND NOW EVEN DID… its so sad.
Never rely on spells and witchcraft for help. These things have a tendency of going wrong, and when they do, oh look, where'd that demon come from?
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There's a difference between "excuse" and "explanation." As a criminal defense attorney, I can tell you that a majority of people locked up for petty crimes suffer from mental illness (treated and untreated). Nobody is "excusing" their behavior, but recognizing the cause of it is the first step towards rehabilitation.
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Overworking.
My coworkers tend to make it a competition to see who can make the most sacrifices for their career. Who puts in the most overtime hours? Who does things off the clock for work more? Etc
It's bulls**t. I have a life and a family I want to prioritize.
Special needs and disabilities in kids. My son is special-needs and the way people romanticize it and make it sound like he’s so lucky to have it and “what a Time to be alive” and all that s**t pisses me off so much. He’s a great kid, I make damn sure he’s got a great quality of life, but he’s never going to have a normal life and there’s nothing cute, quirky or romanticize-able about that.
THIS!! Sure, my munchkins are gifted in their own way but those gifts come with life long struggles.
Abusive relationships. Like stalking your love interest/partner, drama all the time, bad communication and misunderstandings, trying to invoke jealousy, obsessiveness. It's not romantic, it's creepy.
Romanticizing a women's role in family, especially by husbands (case in point Chris Pratt) . Like she works and takes care of kids and cooks and cleans and still takes care of her figure and looks great while the husband is so clueless and dumb that they will burn the house boiling milk. Stop expecting all that of the woman and share in the responsibilities so that the she doesn't have to do all that alone.
I think Millennials have improved this one, since their marriage rate is half what my generation's was. When you live alone, the only one who will do household chores is YOU.
Teenage years. Yes, you are young, but that doesn't mean s**t when you have no control over your life, no life experience, no money, no mental stability and nobody taking you seriously. I wish people would stop telling teenagers that those are the best years of their lives. I was absolutely miserable as a teenager. I'm 23 years old, 24 next month, and only now did I start to enjoy my life.
My life got better in my 30s, but each succeeding decade was exponentially better than the last.
gor8884 said:
Having followers
taleofbenji replied:
There is a very big taboo problem in America today that society isn't ready to deal with.
Which is parents exploiting the s**t out of their kids on social media. And sometimes, the reasons that these kids are getting followers is pretty dark.
Especially as that stuff is there forever. Parents you DO NOT OWN YOUR KIDS. They are not possessions. You didn’t ask your child’s permission to post images of them or talk about what should be private in your online groups. Get a life
ajrichardsonnz said:
The military.
moderately_moderate2 replied:
As a guy with 15 years in, I can't agree more.
Joining the military doesn't make you a good person, nor does it make you special.
Its a job that you chose, that you are compensated very well for (at least in the US).
I plan to retire in 5 years, and move as far away from a military base as I can. Im going to tell people I was in prison for the last 20 years or that I as a janitor.
My dad, grandfather, and great grandfather were/are all in the military. I'm determined to ensure that there will never be a fourth generation. There is too much stress involved for everyone, and free trauma due to parental absence for every child.
Attractive people doing harmful things?
People shouldn't get a pass to do toxic and rude things simply because they're attractive. Why do I see serial killers and toxic partners get romanticized simply because they're hot? Why does that make their horrible actions somehow badass and charismatic??
eggofreddo said:
Still trying after being rejected or being told no.
vanillayanyan replied:
And an extension of this would be to leave your exes alone. Stop texting them and trying to make things work when things are over. Respect people’s decisions to walk away. Dated a guy for 3 months and realized we weren’t in the same place in our lives in terms of life experience and I wasn’t willing to wait for him to catch up. Kept asking me to stop “giving up on us” and I got fed up and blocked him after he would not leave me alone.
THIS. I caught my ex husband poking around my social media 2 months ago. I divorced him in 2000.
History. I get it, as a historian I want to make people interested so that learning why it is so important is fun, but so many eras of history are romanticized and in reality most of history is filthy and violent. Everyone wants to talk about battlefield glory and the magnificence of empires, no one wants to talk about people s***ting themselves to death in a field camp or all the incest it takes to retain a dynasty.
Yes, but I am pretty sure our age will appear filthy and violent to next generations as well.
Sex, I mean yes sex is amazing but we have put it on such an insanely high pedestal it’s basically a superhuman experience. Almost every show, movie, piece of art somehow relates back to sex and like seriously I do love it, but there is more to life.
Destroying your ex's stuff. I don't understand why so much media portrays destroying game systems, cars, TVs, clothes etc. is an appropriate and healthy reaction to a breakup. Even if the person supposedly "deserves" it, it's still criminal.
Being fat.. it’s not cute, it’s not self love, it’s a legitimate health issue and people don’t need to be shamed.. but people should consider the impact on their health.. I would know… fat guy here
I applaud BP for showing us cat photos to distract us from the bad things here. Even if the cat is overweight as to comply with the item.
The "gangsta" lifestyle and all that it entails.
I grew up in Oakland and have witnessed far too many of the people I grew with get caught up in the game. Roughly half of the guys from my former neighborhood are either serving life sentences or were killed. I grew up in the 80s, but it's even worse now.
Hustle culture. I don’t understand why it’s cool to always be busy and dedicating all your waking hours to making money. When do you get to enjoy your time if you are always stressed out?
Hustle culture isn’t for workers, it’s for business owners and entrepreneurs.
Mattie725 said:
People dropping all their own goals and interests for someone else. Yes, the plot of standard rom-com.
AllNamesTaken145 replied:
This is so true my sister got her first boyfriend when she was 18 despite being good at school and almost graduating she drop out, and decided to start working to help her boyfriend out with his band, now she's 23 they broke up it's so idiotic.
Parenthood. It’s not all baseball games and bedtime stories. If you put the effort in to practice patience and bond with your children rather than lord over them, the rewards can be limitlessly gratifying.
Bragging about having a harder childhood than your children and constantly shoving it in their face. Ironically these types of parents usually take out their trauma on their children and continuing the cycle anyway.
Parents doing this is abuse. They have children without getting treated and they traumatize their children because they don't work on getting better.
Small town / rural / country living and lifestyles. So many shows and movies love to portray these less populated communities as havens and perfect places to live and will almost never even acknowledge the very serious problems faced in alot of these communities. This leads to a significant portion of people (mostly middle age white dudes) to almost fetishize this ideal of a rugged yet charming small community unchanged for 150 years full of vibrant personalities where everyone knows each other; and while this is accurate to some extent these places also suffer from huge drug problems, brain drain, racism and homophobia, underfunded social services and are all too often dying in one way or another.
I grew up in a small town. (By "grew up", I mean I spent ages 10-16 there) I didn't know anyone. And there are a ton of issues in that town. Nothing romantic about it.
Getting married young and spending a lot of money on your wedding, and proselytizing your subjective view of love to the world through social media. Lots of couples I know need to go to counseling and make a lot of choices to grow their intimacy and bond in private…
I live in a state that is largely rural. Marrying your highschool sweetheart straight out of high school is super fetishized. Then most of them end up bitter and divorced at 28. It is just gross. Encouraging people to make decisions like getting married and having kids before 25.
Smoking and drinking so much alcohol that you're having a hangover. Both are so bad for your health, yet there's a lot of people who think smoking is sexy and forgetting what you've done the last night because of alcohol is cool. It's not cool, you might have done something really dangerous to you or/and other people.
Even when the drinking and smoking times stop (if they do) there are long term issues caused from it. Neuropathy and COPD are just a couple. That sh!t does not go away.
Pregnancy.
Edited to add: I don't know what the ratio is, but I know that while there are people who had great pregnancies, others had a hell of a time.
Just in my circle of friends, I don't know anyone who didn't have a tough time at some point. We've all commented that pregnancy is so romanticised and you don't find out what it can be like until you're in the thick of it.
It's like hearing about this great club and seeing all their romantic baby bump photos, then joining the club and someone pulls you to one side like "Right, here's a bag of symptoms. Stick your hand in and grab a few. Ooh, bad luck, you got hyperemesis gravidarum!"
Currently 36 weeks pregnant and I’ve hated all 36 weeks. I am so very grateful that I am able to get pregnant, but the strain that pregnancy places on you physically and mentally can be torturous. Why aren’t we educated about the very common symptoms of pregnancy until we experience them?
Living in a van or RV. The people that do it comfortably are often quite wealthy. Also - smells like funk and lots of inconveniences.
My husband and I have spent much of the last thirty years on the road in vans for our work. For us it was overwhelmingly positive- but we rarely drove more than 500 miles in a day, camped in mostly pretty places or parked up with good friends. Our work is extremely gratifying (we’re folk musicians), we adore spending time together and get along super well. We used up four Volkswagen vans- a 66 split front window was the first one, then three VW Westphalia vans- 71, 84 and 91. Then a beloved and wealthy patron bought us a basic 2003 Sprinter which we turned into a glorified Westy and it’s still running beautifully. We have had so many good times on the road- and our last tour was a real high mark for us. Now we are likely to never tour again due to Covid and the degradation of safety in general. The last tour had some super scary moments where due to other drivers we were literally inches away from wrecking. Drivers’ skills and ability to focus on driving has radically declined over…
Codependency. People often get it confused with interdependence. Codependency seeks value through the other person and there's a lack of proper boundaries. Interdependence is 2 autonomous individuals in a relationship together
Conflict. It's always romanticized to "fight for what you believe in" or to "never go down without a fight" or stuff like that, to the point where people forget that opposing something or someone isn't the only solution to a problem. And also that just because someone disagrees with you doesn't mean they want to fight you or be in conflict with you.
Asking the girl out. It’s not going to be this big movie moment, stop building it up and just ask her
Anxiety makes this almost impossible. I've done it maybe twice and even then I was a nervous wreck. Didn't work out either time so I guess back to the drawing board.
Living in a castle. It was cold, damp, full of rats and other pests. No indoor plumbing, people were filthy. I could go on.
France. Don't get me wrong it is a stupidly beautiful place... In parts. But movies and TV have made people believe it is a magical fairy tale place full of roamntic men waiting to sweep women off their feet and overly sexual women just waiting for a man to come along who can satisfy her appetites.
The reality is none of those things. And from a fairly extensive amount of travel that I have done, I'd argue that there are FAR more beautiful countries in the world (broadly) than France.
Again there is ABSOLUTELY beauty in France. But nothing to the tune of its romanticised nature.
I took French in high school and was very excited when I went and I managed well enough, but other than the bread and pastries, it didn’t really send me. I was harassed almost constantly and I also happened to be there during the coldest winter since WWII.
The internet. It's not the freedom everyone hoped fifteen years ago. A s**t ton of advertisement, misinformation and stuff to pay for, makes it a very unfree place.
Internet celebrity. Most people that are famous on the internet probably aren’t making nearly much as people assume and they also are probably working may more hours coming up with things to film, negotiating places to go, and editing to make those short little TikTok or Instagram clips. They are paying the full price for their own benefits and they are paying taxes as an independent contractor. There is a definite shelf life to their earning potential as well and they have to be very careful about where they go and what they do because the internet is a very fickle market to base your livelihood on.
There are good internet personalities and bad internet personalities. Good ones occupy a niche, showcasing a particular talent or unique skill. Bad ones try to garner attention by being offensive or shocking. Compare Tommyinnit or Sad-ist with someone like Pewdiepie or Alex Jones.
Luxury or status brand product. People also should stop looking at another person as ideal. Be it be spiritual or political leader they support or just a sports star. No person is a superhuman at the ground level and often make mistakes as a regular person. And people should also stop thinking things as just good or bad. In almost every case a things are usually grey and just not black and white.
Ireland, living here all of 20 years, the luscious green landscape comes with being too expensive, most people in their 30s not even owning their own house, and alcoholism being a public health concern. Don’t get me wrong I love my home but I’m getting out as soon as I can
Fellow Irish person here. Totally agree on the home ownership if you want to live in or near a city. But saying that, think home ownership and alcoholism concerns are worldwide. Don't think ireland is to blame. Want to be a downer on Ireland? The bloody rain that gives use the lovely green scenery
Having autism. It’s not quirky, or cool, or trendy. I’m autistic and it affects my daily life so much and makes even being outside s**t. No, I’m not your ’autistic bestie’, no you don’t need to treat me like a little kid, no you don’t wish you were autistic. (I don’t speak for every autistic person, this is just my opinion)
Another thing not to romanticize: Twenty four year olds who have the whole world figured out and wish to lecture us about it.
Anything todo with that Kartrashain bunch. I feel so bad for their childern.
Surprised nobody said vampires. Vampires are gross, dead things that eat blood. Definitely not sexy.
I mean, they are also fictional so we can make them sexy if we want, no?
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yeah a lot of people on tiktok are trying to say how they wish they had it and it's normally the "Emily's" that do this s**t thinking that having an illnesss or faking one is the best thing to have and honestly it ain't
Except 2 or 3 exception (living in a castle,...), none of those things seem romantic to me... what a strange name for this list...
Such a refreshing dose of realism. These lists are rarely so to the point.
Comparing mental illnesses. “Oh you have ADHD? I have depression. My problem is worse, your so lucky.” It’s a call for attention and not a fun or cool subject to draw attention. And everyone hurts the same ammount no matter the illness, so don’t think your better then someone because “you’ve gone through and experienced more.”
This list was the worst, it's mostly just a bunch of people taking everyday benign things and arguing against their own extreme distorted take of them, I mean who romanticizes: special needs kids, abusive relationships or history?
I know people said France and Ireland, but honestly the whole of Europe in general. Any country/continent for that matter, all of them have a metric shitload of problems- it’s not even close to just being the US.
I thought this article sucked! Sorry to be negative! I don’t know who is romanticizing being pregnant or conflict or asking a girl out but damn if they are enjoying something don’t rain on their parade! Some people are just trying to cope
OK you don't know who romanticises asking a girl out? Allow me to introduce the concept of romcom. Here, 50 examples. https://www.goodhousekeeping.com/life/entertainment/g3243/best-romantic-comedy-movies/
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I want to add co-parenting to this. There is nothing sweet about it. It's 2 people who couldn't make their relationship work out with a child in the mix, who end up taking each other to court because they can't agree to custody and child-support. Throw in new boyfriends/girlfriends who think they have a say in anything and you got a chaotic mess. In an altruistic ideal world, both parents would cooperate and think only what's best for their little ones and the new partners would keep to the sidelines. Rarely is this the case. But it keep family law professionals employed.
Doesn't co-parenting just mean raising a child whilst not being together (in a romantic sense)?
Load More Replies... Having autism. It’s not quirky, or cool, or trendy. I’m autistic and it affects my daily life so much and makes even being outside s**t. No, I’m not your ’autistic bestie’, no you don’t need to treat me like a little kid, no you don’t wish you were autistic. (I don’t speak for every autistic person, this is just my opinion)
Another thing not to romanticize: Twenty four year olds who have the whole world figured out and wish to lecture us about it.
Anything todo with that Kartrashain bunch. I feel so bad for their childern.
Surprised nobody said vampires. Vampires are gross, dead things that eat blood. Definitely not sexy.
I mean, they are also fictional so we can make them sexy if we want, no?
Load More Replies... yeah a lot of people on tiktok are trying to say how they wish they had it and it's normally the "Emily's" that do this s**t thinking that having an illnesss or faking one is the best thing to have and honestly it ain't
Except 2 or 3 exception (living in a castle,...), none of those things seem romantic to me... what a strange name for this list...
Such a refreshing dose of realism. These lists are rarely so to the point.
Comparing mental illnesses. “Oh you have ADHD? I have depression. My problem is worse, your so lucky.” It’s a call for attention and not a fun or cool subject to draw attention. And everyone hurts the same ammount no matter the illness, so don’t think your better then someone because “you’ve gone through and experienced more.”
This list was the worst, it's mostly just a bunch of people taking everyday benign things and arguing against their own extreme distorted take of them, I mean who romanticizes: special needs kids, abusive relationships or history?
I know people said France and Ireland, but honestly the whole of Europe in general. Any country/continent for that matter, all of them have a metric shitload of problems- it’s not even close to just being the US.
I thought this article sucked! Sorry to be negative! I don’t know who is romanticizing being pregnant or conflict or asking a girl out but damn if they are enjoying something don’t rain on their parade! Some people are just trying to cope
OK you don't know who romanticises asking a girl out? Allow me to introduce the concept of romcom. Here, 50 examples. https://www.goodhousekeeping.com/life/entertainment/g3243/best-romantic-comedy-movies/
Load More Replies... I want to add co-parenting to this. There is nothing sweet about it. It's 2 people who couldn't make their relationship work out with a child in the mix, who end up taking each other to court because they can't agree to custody and child-support. Throw in new boyfriends/girlfriends who think they have a say in anything and you got a chaotic mess. In an altruistic ideal world, both parents would cooperate and think only what's best for their little ones and the new partners would keep to the sidelines. Rarely is this the case. But it keep family law professionals employed.
Doesn't co-parenting just mean raising a child whilst not being together (in a romantic sense)?
Load More Replies...