35 Things People Can Only Fully Comprehend After Going Through Them Themselves

I just left my emotionally abusive husband. It took months of preparation of not just the logistics (where will I go? Who will help me move my things?) but also mental preparation to build up the courage to actually do it. It has now been one week and I’m beginning to feel relief - no more walking on eggshells, no more angry/screaming outbursts from him, no more holes in the walls from where he punched them, no more toxic negativity and “woe is me” attitude to deal with. For the first time in a long time, I feel safe and at peace.

Physically, verbally, sexually, emotionally, financially, or all five. It's hardest to leave someone who is emotionally abusive.

I agree. So hard to explain to people who have never experienced it especially if you are male and the abuser was female.

The first time I asked for a divorce, my dog died a few hours later. I caved in and stayed. Huge mistake. They don't accept you want a divorce or when you say you want out they demand you leave immediately. They tell you to "act normal " when you avoid their touch, guilt-trip you that they're being nice to you and you're not thankful for it. I have one who is financially dependent of me and will not hesitate to drown me in debt when I finally leave. I'm about this much away from doing something stupid that may cost me either my life or my freedom.

I find that the shame is the worst part. So. Much. Shame. What I could have done, when I should have put my foot down, how many times I should have just left. Then there’s the children. It’s terrible. Also mine went to counseling and is a WHOLE NEW PERSON. Took about 4 years. I can’t believe all that happened to me did and I’m still not whole. I realized that more than anything, I let myself down. That’s the shame of it. ( mental, emotional, and financial abuse.)

Education, education, education! Teaching kids about mental illness just as they are taught about any other illness is essential. And it's working. In my lifetime alone I have seen a significant change in attitude towards mental illness. There is a long way to go but hopefully we can continue down this road. A certain group of people may call us snowflakes. If trying to be kinder and more understanding makes us snowflakes, I'm praying for a blizzard!! :)

I saw a comic once that said something along the lines of "The next time someone tells me to 'just get over' my mental illness I'm going to invite them over and hit them in the knees with a baseball bat.Then I'll tell them to walk it off". Just as possible.

Omg! Post-natal depression. A part of my brain was wondering why the rest of me was so anxious and overwhelmed about every little thing. Like a disconnection somewhere in my head. Medication fixed it fortunately.

I have a friend who tells me I have no stress in my life. Like f**k you. You don't know what's going on in my brain. She claims to be educated about health issues then says b******t like this.

I was in a mental health crisis, constant s*****dal ideation, and an acquaintance asked if I'd EVER TRIED YOGA. I wanted to smack her. Side note, I was doing a ton of yoga at the time, and still wanted to unalive myself daily.

This is one of the reasons I hate books and TV shows that have the "you must forgive them because they are family" trope. No. NO ONE is entitled to forgiveness, not even family. Forgiveness must be earned, and only the person harmed can decide if it has been. And, even IF you forgive them, that does not mean you must let them stay in your life.

Especially when they put up a good front and everyone else thinks they're wonderful. But no one else sees the faces they hide from the rest of the world.

Completely true. I'm 11 months into zero contact with my parents/sister/her husband after being physically threatened, being accused of things that never happened (abusing my wife/kids), being called a bad person/father/husband, etc, I could go on. We have many shared friends and everyone talks to me like I'm the lunatic in the situation, tells me life is too short, you only get one family, etc. F**k that. I'm actually happy with my life now. Life's too short to try to make it work with toxic people. Blood relation doesn't mean anything, you make your own family. It was a hard step to make but worth it. You don't look back on it and regret cutting them out, you look back and regret not doing it sooner.

Another 'been there / done that' item. This is turning into a rather dark form of Bingo.

My youngest son and I have had to cut out family members because of their toxic behavior. Our life is so much more peaceful since we made that decision, sometimes you just have to for your own sanity and happiness......

especially if it an 'invisible' disability. people can't wrap their minds around that you have good days and bad days. a good day will be when you can function and put out impression that you're fine. have several good days and people start doubting there is anything wrong. so, when that bad day pops up you get 'you seem fine - it can't be as bad as you say".

People think that if they can't see a disability it's not there. Idiots

Also resulting loss of friends

I'm going through this at the moment ,having to accept my life has changed and will never be what it was..easy for the specialist to say "you have to accept your new normal."when he's not the one dealing with it

I feel this one on my soul