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Childhood and youth have their charm and supply most of us with memories that, if not always magical, are vivid and emotionally charged. There are so many things we love in children - openness to experiences, energy, and lightheartedness. These are all positive things. However, they have to be supplemented with other character traits and skills once people grow up. Otherwise, someone who is mature physically can appear to be just a little child emotionally and mentally. Identifying such character traits in you or your partner can be a first step towards dealing with difficult situations and maybe finally… growing up. People in this Reddit thread brought up 32 indications that a person is emotionally immature.

More info: Reddit

#1

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Being an Andrew Tate fan

Andrew Tate, a social media influencer and a former professional kickboxer, is a self-described misogynist. He says women belong at home, can’t drive, and are a man’s property. He was arrested in 2022 in Romania. He is suspected of human trafficking and forming an organized crime group. Still, his videos have 11.6 billion views on TikTok.

borntoeatschoki , Pearl Talk Report

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DennyS (denzoren)
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If I met someone who's like "I listen to Andrew Tate" it'd be the last time I hold any respect for that person....if possible I will also completely cut them out of my life.

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#2

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Reacts badly to hearing “no” instead of calmly accepting it like an adult.

celestialism , Andrea Piacquadio Report

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Hill Branda
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is something most preschoolers learn. If someone can't cope with it as an adult...run for the hills, my friend. RUN.

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#3

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Has to be asked to clean up or otherwise contribute.

weenertron , Ron Lach Report

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Sarah SH
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When my husband cleans, he does a great job. The only problem being that he acts as though he’s done me a favor afterward.

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#4

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity He thinks periods are ick and throws a tantrum if you send him out to pick up tampons.

Chancevexed , Anna Shvets Report

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Shark Lady
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My soon to be son in law, will put a tampon in his pocket when he knows it's my daughter's time of the month just in case she forgets or doesn't have enough on her. I love him for this because my daughter really suffers and he tries to make things as easy as I for her.

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#5

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Being quick to anger which results into destroying things like punching holes in walls or breaking furniture. Added bonus when they aren't the ones who fix their messes.

technosoup , Karolina Grabowska Report

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Libstak
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, my ex. He once destroyed my phone because he asked a mate what the location of the Thunderdome was and i said from across the room Calder Park Races is also called the Thunderdome, I shouldn't have interrupted and didn't know what I was talking about. We lived 10 minutes from there, I lived there all my life and he was from across the other side of the city. Learnt all about his true attitude to me that day, it was my phone too and no he did not replace it. When we broke up he moved back in with his mum, they had a fight and he punched a hole in her wall. He rang me for sympathy cos she upset him,like seriously?

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#6

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Misogyny and racism.

snargletooth40 , MART PRODUCTION Report

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DennyS (denzoren)
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I live in the Caribbean, specifically Trinidad and it amazes me how many racist persons you come across...on an island that's known as the "melting pot" even our anthem has "every creed and race find and equal place".

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#7

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity When he never admits he's wrong. Also, a lack of emotional regulation. A mature man is able to understand his emotions, process them and properly communicate them.

WokeDorito35 , RODNAE Productions Report

#8

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity This sounds dumb but playing a game with him. Like a simple no stakes card/board game. If he throws a hissy fit because he didn’t win (especially if he’s never played before) he is immature and shows his true personality.

hippiesnowflake , Thirdman Report

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Howard M. Lewis Ship
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think game playing is an underrated life skill. Playing any kind of skill-based game like Chess, Go, or eurogames like Ticket to Ride, Settlers of Catan (or literally *thousands of others*) enhances the players' understanding of The Theory Of Mind, the (almost) uniquely human ability to visualize what another person knows and doesn't know. That kind of non-emotional empathy is useful in any number of other areas. Likewise, understanding how working within a system of rules leads to better outcomes would help people understand how politics works.

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#9

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Insecurity. They brag or show off, especially to other men or about ‘macho’ things- how many women they have [made love] with, women they want to [make love] with (yeah, Charlize Theron is going go for a dude with a neckbeard), how tough they are, their truck / guns/ love of MMA. Performative masculinity.

Or conversely they try to build themselves up by putting others down. Some men do this really obviously. But with some men, it’s more subtle. They seem like an ok guy, then out of left field ‘women take good men for granted and just want a wallet.’

Obviously, all men don’t have fragile male egos. But the ones who do are insufferable.

JoJo-likes-bikes , Sabel Blanco Report

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Mabelbabel
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The whole alpha male idea is a complete myth. The writer of the book about wolves who was the first to describe it, David Mech, has repeatedly said it was wrong, he did more research later that disproved his initial theories but the myth of the alpha male simply won't die. You're not an alpha male, you're an arrogant bully who is terrified of his own feelings so refuses to acknowledge them and so insecure about yourself that you have to put on an act of what you think a man is. You're lying to yourself and everyone else.

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#10

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Avoiding responsibility. No accountability for his own actions.

HalfDayArmy , Ron Lach Report

#11

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Victim mentality. Somehow his ex’s are always the one who have done him wrong. Not knowing how to realize or articulate their emotions. No ambition AND no action towards making those ambitions reality.

lavenderolive , Alex Green Report

#12

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Thinking that watching him do something he enjoys but that you can't join in with is going to be the highlight of your night. This is a toddler showing off in front of mom so that she'll lavish him with praise. If he's this self-centered when he's being nice imagine what a nightmare he is when he's throwing a tantrum.

trudytuder , Анастасия Беккер Report

#13

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Black and white thinking. Not taking accountability for their actions and always finding a way to blame someone else for their mistakes. Refuses to apologize or “I’m sorry you feel that way” apologies. Won’t listen to or seems uninterested in your opinions. dismisses or invalidates your feelings. Oblivious to emotional or social cues after repeated attempts or conversations. Disrespects or argues against your boundaries.

chewiechihuahua , Evan Velez Saxer Report

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#14

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Has a child-like temperament and can't delay gratification. It's always concerning when he can't excersize restraint.

SweetestSage , Andrea Piacquadio Report

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Upstaged75
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Like when my dad is sick. He reverts to acting like a toddler. Complete with tantrums. I recently read him the riot act when I watched him swear at my mother over something incredibly stupid, just because he was ill and felt terrible. Sorry, but you are still an adult and are expected to behave as such - I don't care how bad your cold is!

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#15

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Cheating, lying about cheating, using health issues as an excuse to cheat, talking to other girls on Bumble while laying next to you in bed on vacation after flying down to visit.

OkayAlfalfa , Dalila Dalprat Report

#16

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Everything is a joke to him.

Humor can help release tension or to express one’s feelings without fully committing to them. However, it can and often is used to disguise the truth, keep another person at distance, distract oneself from engaging with feelings behind the joke, and avoid self-awareness.

mangopy , Diva Plavalaguna Report

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Josh
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I know a lot of people are used to the Schroedingers A-Hole type of guy here, but as a prime example of another, more subtle example of this problem: there are those of us that regularly use self deprecating humor and jokes about everything mundane to keep an emotional distance from everyone. Even if hyper self aware, it keeps most genuine emotions far from the mind and let's us isolate our own problems.

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#17

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Calling women "females", describing themselves as traditional in terms of relationships or gender roles, or wanting a relationship just to have children.

Some_Pilot_7056 , Buro Millennial Report

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Mabelbabel
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's quite useful though, if someone uses that term in a derogatory or dismissive fashion (or even worse, the term 'femoid') then it marks them out as someone to avoid.

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#18

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity He keeps saying "I understand what you're saying/feeling," then in the next breath says something that proves himself wrong.

YarnAndMetal , RODNAE Productions Report

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kitten levels tokyo
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Binge drinking vehicle antifreeze when he can’t afford real alcohol is also a bad sign. (Mostly a Russian soldier thing.) EDIT: Sorry! It was Russian soldiers drinking brake fluid from their vehicles. Here is a link https://www.rbth.com/history/327553-crazy-soviet-alcohol

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#19

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Damn. This brought me back to four months ago when I was googling “is he too emotionally guarded for a relationship,” without realizing that really his lack of affection was because he had a whole other relationship outside of me.

Anyway, a few things:

- He treats you based on how he’s feeling, justifies his behavior on how he’s feeling

- Instead of making you a priority, he explains his lack of effort with excuses

- Disappears whenever you have a serious conversation or are addressing a conflict

- Does not hold space or empathy for your emotional wounds & intensities

- References past loves just a little too much

- Claims being “emotional” is something they’ve grown out of

- Does not respect your time, aka doesn’t plan dates in advance; doesn’t make a routine out of your time together (aka seeing each other every weekend); you’re often waiting for them to initiate plans either the day of or the night before

noordinarymind , cottonbro studio Report

#20

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Hot headed, can't apologize, doesn't know how to clean, needs you to be a parent to him, doesn't take care of himself/ doesn't try to improve in life ECT ECT. (This doesn't just apply to men though)

ThrowawayMcRib , Polina Zimmerman Report

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#21

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity That he can’t accept when a woman expresses that she doesn’t want a romantic relationship with him and that she doesn’t want to remain in contact with him. So he takes the “biggest sore loser” approach and makes up stories about her/talks trash about her on social media and to anyone who will listen. Then he claims himself to be the victim and she is the one who “ruined his life.”

scros004 , Charlie Foster Report

#22

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Dating a significantly younger girl and then lying to his mother and friends about your age because he’s not comfortable with telling them your real age because deep down he knows it’s wrong (an actual experience)

Luunarfern , Andrea Piacquadio Report

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David H
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

well there are a lot of things to unpack here, this person is talking about one very specific example. And yes if the man lies about his gf's age, its immature, but as long as they are of legal age, I dont care what you do. I knew a man who met his wife when she was 21 and he was 35, they were married 60 year until she died (were together 61 years in total), he lived to 104. The hiding the age bc they are uncomfortable is a sign of immaturity, but as I said, as long as both parties are legal and there was no grooming, I dont care.

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#23

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Gets angry at you after you tell them the way you feel during a disagreement.

Zestyclose-Warning96 , LinkedIn Sales Solutions Report

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Stardust she/her
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Depends on the disagreement. If it’s caused because you’d rather sacrifice him to Satan than do the dishes, he’s allowed to get mad at you

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#24

Anytime you want to talk about something serious or something that’s bothering you, he’ll deflect and try to change the subject or ignore you because they don’t like dealing with uncomfortable situations.

hadesrose0909 Report

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Karen Philpott
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's more of a "it's not about me so I'm not going to listen to you and your .....!".

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#25

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Using all kinds of excuses to act poorly. His mental health, his parents, past relationships, you, etc etc. All people have their scars but an adult recognizes them, takes ownership/accountability for them and takes action to make themselves better.

Msworld2031 , Nik Shuliahin 💛💙 Report

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Apatheist Account2
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wait, we can't have mental health problems now? We've only just got used to admitting to having them!

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#26

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity Controlling, jealous, lacks consideration for the input of others, can't or won't take care of himself, can't fathom somebody having a different opinion than him without taking it as a personal attack, continually dates women or men a LOT younger than himself, can't stand opposition or to be told no, blames others for his own actions, angers quickly and/or violently, and can't hold down a job among a few.

Puzzled_Juice_3406 , Haidan Report

#27

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity When he's lived at his apartment for a period of time & it looks like he just moved in. Stuff still in bins/containers. A single couch, TV, & gaming system in his living room, little to no other furniture. No pillowcases, sheets on the bed, or just a mattress on the floor. Nothing on the walls except a few Kobe Bryant posters. Piles of laundry everywhere, piles of dishes everywhere. Hanging bed sheets in place of curtains, or no curtains at all. Messy floors & counters, stains, etc. Only knows how to cook kraft dinner & frozen pizza.

lilamilasoho , cottonbro studio Report

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Alexia
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hm. "Little to no furniture" may have some exceptions. My apartment only had very basic furniture for years, just because I was saving every cent and couldn't afford other pieces. Agree with the rest.

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#28

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity When he cannot give a straightforward answer

inamessandcrisis , Anastasia Shuraeva Report

#30

People Online Are Pointing Out Signs That An Adult Is Not Acting His Age, So Here Are 30 Signs Of Emotional And Mental Immaturity When having those emotionally deep conversations or being vulnerable with them. They laugh it off, dismiss it, change the subject, or try to debate it like your feelings aren't really your feelings. They could also blow up and become mad or upset at these feelings too. Instead of empathizing, understanding, or trying to comprehend what you are feeling.

They will side step any emotional depth and keep everything surface level or compensate by being overly sexual. Because emotional vulnerability is really scary for them /s so they gave to compensate with the physical vulnerable by being a gross creepy perv.

They will have an excuse for everything. And nothing is ever their fault. So being broke in mountains of debt and unemployed. Is because of circumstance not because of their own choices and decisions. And not understanding the amount of s**t they are really in.

waffleznstuff30 , Etienne Boulanger Report

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