Unfortunately, not everything in life can be flowers and butterflies. And while the less positive things are not something one typically enjoys, they tend to make people appreciate all that’s nice just a little bit more.
Some rather bitter aspects of life were recently discussed by members of the ‘Ask’ community, after one user asked them what are some of the saddest truths about life. Fellow netizens got heartbreakingly honest, covering everything from the downsides of being a good person to time relentlessly passing us by, and beyond. Scroll down to find their answers on the list below and see for yourself what gloomy things tend to balance out the positive in life.
Below you will also find Bored Panda’s interview with Associate Professor at the Department of Philosophy at Wilfrid Laurier University, Dr. Gary Foster, who was kind enough to answer a few of our questions about dealing with the negative aspects of life.
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Being a “good person” doesn’t absolve you from bad things happening to you.
There is no greater proof there is no god/gods at all is bad things happening to good people, and good things happening to bad people.
The government doesnt give s s**t about homeless people.
While discussing the importance of thinking about the less uplifting aspects of life, Dr. Gary Foster told Bored Panda that it is important to do it once in a while. “Life is full of sadness and tragedy as well as joy and excitement,” he said. “The ancient Greeks—and I am sure other cultures as well—recognized this, as is expressed in Greek tragedy. Aristotle, for instance, thought that the role of tragedy (in the theater) was to arouse the emotions of pity and fear so that we could experience a catharsis or cleansing of these emotions. I think that sometimes today we read certain kinds of fiction or watch certain movies for similar reasons.”
"People don't get what they deserve, they get what they get" - Greg House
Some people are awful humans their entire lives and never suffer a single consequence for it, while others do everything they can to be genuinely good people and get s**t on their entire lives.
This seems like basically a repeat of the “Life’s not fair” post.
Dr. Foster added that sometimes we simply need a good cry. “It is good, I think, to reflect, not only on the good and joyful things in life, but also the reality of suffering and sorrow.
“Of course, dwelling on these ‘negative’ realities is not healthy any more than ignoring them is,” he continued, “but psychologically speaking, I think there is something healthy about facing the unpleasant realities of life (to the degree that it is possible) and still affirming that life is good or worth living. Nietzsche and Camus both seem to endorse such an attitude.”
That you can do everything right. Be the best version of yourself. Some people will still leave and you can still fail.
We rarely are aware of our "last" moments, so don't cherish them until they are a fading memory. The last time your dad hugged you back. The last passionate kiss from somebody you love. The last time you ran as fast as you could. The last time you were proud of yourself for accomplishing something. etc.
The odds are that you’re a lowly worker ant, and you won’t really be able to change that. Find happiness in your life, no matter how mundane others try to make it seem….
Also, remember that not all hobbies are there for gain. I have two main "hobbies" now, garden and archery. I will never get anything for archery and that is fine. With garden... well, I have a lots of zucchini every year, but I'm really trying to get bell peppers and tomatoes this year. But even if I will get nothing again, just preparing the garden was well-spent time.
According to Dr. Gary Foster, contemplating the sad or tragic aspects of life can benefit a person partly for the reasons that Aristotle offered. “Sometimes we need a good cleansing or catharsis of certain emotions which seem to arise quite naturally during the everyday drama of life,” he suggested.
“But I also think there is virtue and empowerment in simply accepting the world the way it is and being okay with that. When I say accepting the world the way it is, I don't mean that we shouldn't try to change unjust societies or unjust situations in our immediate environment (with family and friends), but rather accepting the fact that people live and die, experience joy and suffering, and so on. These are things that we have no ultimate control over.”
80 years sounds like a long time at first, but it's actually very short.
No one gives a f**k about you. Except your dog.
Do you need a hug? You seem like you need a hug. Here, have a hug from a complete internet stranger. There’s nothing creepy about it. I just want you to know even if you’re all sorts of snarky (yep, I’ve read your comments) it doesn’t mean you’re unlovable. So imma virtually wrap my arms around you, give you the biggest hug ever.
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ive had a mental breakdown on the phone with my boyfriend multiple times and he didnt leave me so
Oh my cat too. He might ignore me all day, but as soon as I start crying, he's there, meowing, touching me, doing everything to make me stop, sitting as still as a puppet in my arms while I cry into his fur. It clearly disturbs him and he follows me around for days to make sure it doesn't happen again, constantly climbing on me and sniffing my eyes and cheeks to ensure they're now dry. He was my best comfort when my mom died two years ago, and whenever I have a moment of grief he's there. That cat has a golden retriever soul in a cat body.
You could give it your all and come out empty handed.
E.g.; Nikola Tesla.
When it comes to what tends to upset people the most, the expert admitted that it’s hard to think of things outside of the most obvious. “A sense of injustice often upsets people,” he contemplated. “Also, not being recognized or respected (that often accompanies a sense of injustice, especially among oppressed people).”
He also pointed out that at the level of everyday interpersonal interactions, people want to be listened to or understood, and if they’re not, a feeling of isolation and other negative emotions might arise. “If this is accompanied by what looks like willful ignorance, neglect, or an unwillingness to really listen or try to understand on the part of another person, this can lead to anger and resentment, of which there seems to be no shortage.”
That sometimes it doesn’t matter what you do. Not everyone can succeed, be wealthy, etc.
The time you spend with your parents is counted. You may only have 5 more Thanksgivings with them.
Most of those happy little babies and toddlers you see will ground down by life into shallow joyless husks.
I look at my daughter and wish I could do more for her to protect her from this world.
If you teach your children to enjoy reading, looking for beauty, being outside, and being creative, they will not be ground down by anything.
“So, the very things that can be beneficial to reflect on—sadness, tragedy, what Camus calls ‘the unreasonable silence of the universe’, and so on—can turn quite negative at times, especially at a personal level if the person cannot find a way, through an attitude, disposition, strategy, or whatever, to put the negative into perspective,” Dr. Foster pointed out.
“Of course, some people experience situations in life that seem so negative that it is difficult to imagine how they can rise above it. Jean-Paul Sartre, at least in his early work, thought that even in such situations, one can respond with a certain ‘attitude’ which can still be positive and which they can take responsibility for. There are times when I think he may have been right, but other times when I am not so sure. Some circumstances seem almost impossible to overcome, psychologically or attitude-wise.”
Your body does wear out eventually. Take care of it early. 62 male. It won't happen to me, I'm invincible. Superhuman.
It does and will happen. Listen to your "olders" we have been there done that.
Life is unfair. You can try your best and still not succeed and someone else can have it all without any effort.
All relationships end in loss.
Your job is to make sure the plusses outweighed the minuses when the relationship ends.
We’re all trapped in a dystopian nightmare but it is real life.
LOL. We all live in the best ever time to be alive. Almost everyone alive is happier, richer and healthier, with smaller families and less chance of watching their children die than at any time in the past. There are challenges, but compared to most of human history this is far closer to utopia than dystopia. Forgetting this is so entitled. EDIT: Media, even independent media, are biased towards bad news. For a truer picture I recommend playing the quizzes on upgrader.gapminder.org
A lot of success relies on luck.
Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity. Random chance is a different story.
That you gain wisdom when you're too old to steer your life anymore.
I don't agree with this one. While many acquire additional wisdom as they age, I have met children who were wise beyond their years as well as older people who were devoid of wisdom.
That no matter what you do in some way you will always suffer, suffering is part of the human condition.
You are mostly destined for what situation you arrive into. If your Dad has a commercial real estate business when your born. Chances are, more likely than not you will be a commercial real estate owner and be filthy rich and there's nothing you did great or wonderful to put yourself in that position besides being born into that family and then basically not becoming a d**g addict and ruining your opportunity.
Most of us aren't born into money and that's why most people don't have a lot. It's pretty straight forward. There are outliers and success stories of paupers to princes but the fact is- that's not very likely. I'm sorry. It doesn't mean you won't have a good life, but if you get too fixated on the American dream you will always come up short.
The American Dream is no longer for any American- it is for the top 10%.
You spend your life creating memories to look back upon when you get old just to have your mind to forget them.
Mine is that every beginning has an end, and everything we hold dear today might be just a memory tomorrow.
I just created 2 amazing humans who I love with all my heart and they will grow old and die. What's the point?
No matter what you do, there will always be someone that outshines you at whatever it is. For me it's art.
Bad attitude. Take me as an example. In 2019 I decided that I want to learn to play some instrument. I decided to buy a ukulele (with thought "how hard it can be, it has only 4 strings after all") and I gave it a try. I learned few chords and gave it a try and I was pretty rubbish, honestly. But who cares? I got little bit better after some time, so I took it to work to practice during night shifts. And after a one or two shifts, I realized three things. First, it is funny instrument. Everyone wanted to give it a try. Second, some of my colleagues were pretty good with music. Third, I didn't make good music, but I pushed somebody else to grab a guitar again and make good music. It even looked like they will start a band (but then Covid happened). You don't need to be great (or good), you can still make a change.
Each person has a ceiling. Some are higher than others.
Unfortunately mine is extremely low. I can barely even play Gorilla Tag, and I’m 5’6!
A lot of these felt like they were written by a teenager trying to be edgy
YOU JUST DONT UNDERSTAND MEEEEEEEEEEEE *cries in angsty child*
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I'm in my mid 50s and had to stop reading this. Too depressing reminding me I've only got a relative amount of good years left. Right I'm off to find posts about cute animals.
It could help for these souls in anguish to fully realize that a) they are not alone in these feelings and b) in fact these insights and observations - are ancient. Thousands of years old. The very best example I know of is the music- and words - in "O Fortuna" - composed in 1935 by Carl Orff, based on poems he found - from the 1200s . Fortuna being the Roman goddess Fate- and the entire piece is an outrage, anger- about Fate screwing everybody, all the time. You probably know the music- it's of the most epic music we have. All the stories about it get long- This is the production I know best; German TV, first rate https://tinyurl.com/y2a7zvvf You don't have to speak German - just watch the anger against - Fate. Ok, they were cursing God, really... but you're not supposed to... So - we all know these things. And yet- and yet.
A lot of these were pretty inane so I will leave you with this thought. How much of our knowledge was discovered because someone was bored and thought why not?
Quit drinking, smoking dope, watching tic tock, read a book and go outside once in a while. Talk to people. And lastly, lose the negative outlook about EVERYTHING. Try that for a month and repost. I'll wait.
parents don't "just want (our) kids to be happy". parents want what makes them happy to also make their kids happy. if those don't align, parents will choose what makes themselves happy over their kids' happiness. every. single. time. regardless of the pain it causes their kids
A lot of these felt like they were written by a teenager trying to be edgy
YOU JUST DONT UNDERSTAND MEEEEEEEEEEEE *cries in angsty child*
Load More Replies... I'm in my mid 50s and had to stop reading this. Too depressing reminding me I've only got a relative amount of good years left. Right I'm off to find posts about cute animals.
It could help for these souls in anguish to fully realize that a) they are not alone in these feelings and b) in fact these insights and observations - are ancient. Thousands of years old. The very best example I know of is the music- and words - in "O Fortuna" - composed in 1935 by Carl Orff, based on poems he found - from the 1200s . Fortuna being the Roman goddess Fate- and the entire piece is an outrage, anger- about Fate screwing everybody, all the time. You probably know the music- it's of the most epic music we have. All the stories about it get long- This is the production I know best; German TV, first rate https://tinyurl.com/y2a7zvvf You don't have to speak German - just watch the anger against - Fate. Ok, they were cursing God, really... but you're not supposed to... So - we all know these things. And yet- and yet.
A lot of these were pretty inane so I will leave you with this thought. How much of our knowledge was discovered because someone was bored and thought why not?
Quit drinking, smoking dope, watching tic tock, read a book and go outside once in a while. Talk to people. And lastly, lose the negative outlook about EVERYTHING. Try that for a month and repost. I'll wait.
parents don't "just want (our) kids to be happy". parents want what makes them happy to also make their kids happy. if those don't align, parents will choose what makes themselves happy over their kids' happiness. every. single. time. regardless of the pain it causes their kids
