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Here’s a quick question for you, Pandas: how many of you have an account on LinkedIn? With 830 million members in over 200 countries, LI is an utterly massive online professional network. Though ‘professional’ might be a bit of a misnomer. As anyone who has spent time on the network knows, things can get pretty darn ridiculous sometimes.

Posts about completely made-up situations. Posts so full to the brim with bragging that they make you gag. Posts that exaggerate the positive qualities of the author, as well as those of their company. And posts about how CEOs acted like total jerks but tried to pretend they were super deep and professional (and totally don’t have control and/or greed issues). The cringe is real. And it all ends up on the ‘The Best of LinkedIn’ Twitter page.

Run by JR Hickey, from California, the account shows the side of LinkedIn that many would prefer would remain hidden. He gently makes fun of all the “heroes and influencers brave enough to share their stories in an effort to inspire others.” Scroll down for his best featured posts, upvote your fave ones, and tell us all about the most bizarre things you’ve stumbled upon on LI yourselves, dear Pandas.

Bored Panda got in touch with JR, the founder of the entire project on Twitter, and he was kind enough to answer our questions. He told us about the history of 'The Best of LinkedIn' and shared his thoughts about the culture of the platform and its problems. He didn't beat around the bush and was brutally honest about just how ridiculous 'LinkedInfluencers' are and how they react to his content. You'll find his thoughts below.

#1

People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

BestofLinkedin Report

KJ
Community Member
3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I came out of the pandemic fatter, does that count?

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JR shared the history of 'The Best of LinkedIn' account on Twitter with us. "Back in 2018, I was an Account Executive for a SaaS company in San Francisco. I had a boss who was a dinosaur—his idea of a good follow-up to a meeting was mailing laminated copies of the deck we presented to the prospect after the fact. The phrase, 'Stop by Kinko's' was uttered a few times in my short tenure there (Kinko's was dropped by FedEx in 2008, ten years prior)."

A large part of JR's job at the time was cold calling on LinkedIn. "I was already dissatisfied with my role, my career, and the company, so spending a few hours a day on LinkedIn just about pushed me over the edge," he was very candid. "I began seeing the first inklings of these so-called 'LinkedInfluencers' and started screenshotting their posts and sharing them on my personal Twitter account. Once those gained traction, I decided to create a dedicated Twitter account for it, and thus, @BestOfLinkedin was born."

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Bored Panda was curious how JR would describe the professional network's culture. He told us that 'toxic' gets thrown around too often lately. "I would say the best way to describe LinkedIn's culture is 'downright demented.' It's just a giant back-patting circle/echo chamber where people aren't even telling a version of the truth anymore," he stressed that the amount of fiction on LI is utterly absurd these days.

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    #3

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Delta Dawn
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    and then everyone clapped

    UnpopularPanda
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    no then she backflipped and THEN everyone clapped

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    Mistiekim
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What she meant to write is “ My kid asked to borrow $20 and I said no so she took my credit card.”

    Colin Timp
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "And spent $1400. I had to teach her that she'll be making payments of $70 a month for the rest of her life at 17.9% interest."

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    Libstak
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Proudly sponsored by VISA, American Express and MasterCard...

    Random panda
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Although some 14 year-olds are well-versed enough to understand these concepts and apply them, the fact the it's made by a 'Top 100 Most Powerful Woman Canada' and 'Bestselling Author' as well as the fact it's on LINKEDIN, reduces all of it's credibility.

    Kathryn Baylis
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So the kid figured out how to get on her parents’ bank account AND credit cards at 14, and Mom is too dumb to realize she’s been had. Wait until the smarter parents of one of the kids this girl is clueing into this scam sees right through it and word gets back to this mother.

    James016
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is a great contender for the Didn't Happen Of The Year awards

    Trish Smith
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Especially when she told how she indoctrinated all of her young friends!! Lol

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    RandomPanda
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And then the credit card clapped

    Jill Hojnacki
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Guess I’m old. My dad took me to the bank and opened a savings account for me when I was about 5 or 6. I didn’t have to do any convincing, But, boy was I proud of having my very own pass book & when I got to go to the bank and present it to the teller along with the proceeds from my piggy bank to make a deposit made me feel very grown up, indeed.. Banking today is far more convenient, but it’s kind of a shame kids don’t get to experience that sort of thing anymore is kind of a shame.

    ArodTheHorrible
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, that's it... teach her to base the value of her life on her credit score

    Kevin J. Henning
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    While a possibility, I'm leaning more toward b******t.

    James Nelson Jr
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah I'm going to shelve this one in the never happened category

    Luis Gomez
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And then credit karma stood up and clapped.

    Matthew Daniel
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I must be an outlier as I find this credible.

    LH25
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have to wonder if a 14 YO can be added as an authorized user on a credit card?

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    Susan Bosse
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How do people have the time to just make up s**t like this? Or who do they think is going to believe it? Her 14 year old is probably a cat.

    Trophy Husband
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I want to see the follow up post 3 months later...

    Shane S
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well then you’re a moron for giving your daughter access to a line of credit. I once saw a kid make a non-refundable $400 purchase. The parent was livid but it was a completely valid purchase so there was nothing that could be done since the mom didn’t want to report her daughter to police for theft. The kid shouldn’t have made the purchase without consulting mom but mom “trusted” her with the credit card.

    Pam Page
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Usually the "fairy tale" involves a four-year-old. Credit to Samra for at least making the story semi-believable.

    Syringa Wessels
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i mean i didn’t go this far but i tried to get a credit card when i was 14 because i took some classes in high school about financial literacy, but you can’t build credit for yourself without your own credit card and (at least in the state im from) you can’t get a credit card under 18. Credit scores are scary s**t, especially when your in high school about to leave for your first time

    Desiree Meredith
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I did this for my son. But, here's the thing. I did it, not him...me. I don't think a 14 year old can even comprehend how important credit building and maintaining is to their future endeavors.

    ThatRandomGuy
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    as a 14 year old, just can confirm this never happened and it prob's never will at my age

    ElenaK
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well she is an author ...

    Natalie H
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It’s either a Proud Mommy Moment, or a You Got Played Sucka!!! Moment🤡

    Cyndielouwhoo
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought this was the beginning of a fraud story about the teenagers going on a free-wheeling spending spree!

    Ariana Whitby
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i mean, this isnt that far fetched these days. im still in high school and have taken financial literacy for two years, we do have to start young

    Misty-Dawn Amayi
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And then she woke up and vowed for the 'nth time to stop at the second tequila shot.

    Zander Porbanda
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It sounds more like the Mom met a con artist. Seriously, Mom, I have to throw away all the candy in the house. Please bring it to my room.

    Heather Talma
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If this kid were real I'd scold them for not already having a savings account for her. 14?

    Deidre Lippnik
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Iim sorry but that sounds like something a parent would put online to make them seem like amazing parents

    Satan Laughs
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Actually this is plausible. Come on.

    West Hermans
    Community Member
    3 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Why is this so unlikely? A 14-yr old figuring out how to get her own credit card, that's worth pushing for by telling mom about credit scores.

    Featherytoad
    Community Member
    3 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    That's exactly what I was doing at 14.

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    "It's unoriginal sellouts who regurgitate corporate buzzwords and stories of incredible business acumen in an effort to game the LinkedIn algorithm and try to hide the fact that there isn't a single thing that's interesting about them. And nobody will call them out, for fear of losing their job or it blowing back on them professionally. The entire platform lacks accountability, which is insane because its intention initially was to be just that," JR pointed out that very few people are willing to put their careers on the line for the sake of calling out downright lies.

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    That's not to say that LinkedIn doesn't have its upsides. The founder of 'The Best of LinkedIn' said that the professional network is a "terrific place to read business news, as well as to find jobs, recruit talent, and network with people in your industry.

    "It's a valuable business development tool but sadly it's been watered down by these self-proclaimed 'Linkedinfluencers' and their BS success stories. LinkedIn could improve the user experience drastically by focusing on moderating these posts and suppressing them when they don't offer anything valuable," he suggested how the platform could change for the better.

    #4

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Chocolate llama
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wonder if they also have the lipstick requirement for the men they interview...

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    #5

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Caro Caro
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Uhm Joseph .... maybe you should work on YOU first? Just a thought ...

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    #6

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    "If the only reason you're posting on LinkedIn is to show off a picture of yourself with a story about how you were called 'too pretty' to be in business then your post will be taken down. If you aren't sharing anything educational or valuable, and instead are attributing incredible management advice from your FIVE YEAR OLD, your account will be banned. Sadly, I wish this was an easy fix, but LinkedIn has replicated every other social media platform and become another runaway train of trash," he said that he's not holding on to much hope that LI will improve in the future.

    "LinkedInfluencers, for how much 'expertise' they have, have some of the thinnest skins on the Internet. Because they 'create' their content strictly for LinkedIn, where nobody criticizes or calls them out, they lose their minds when an account like @BestOfLinkedin does. Personally, I've created content for over a decade now in the forms of comedy, podcasting videos, and articles," JR told Bored Panda.

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    "When you create anything for the Internet, there's going to be 50% or more people who hate it. So you have to know that criticism comes with the territory. But when a LinkedInfluencer sees me poke fun at them for @BestofLinkedin? Oftentimes they don't know what to do with themselves. Usually, they'll try to doxx me or get me fired. Good luck, I'm a freelance Creative Director and don't have a boss. I get paid to write things for social media and more. So yeah, I'm doing exactly what I'm supposed to. If you don't like what's being said about you on the Internet, the proper response isn't to take your ball and run home. Or worse, take your ball and run and tell your parents."

    #7

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Donkey boi
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The body language does not reflect someone 'searching and longing for a solution'. And why the heck would your dad be taking pictures of you while his other daughter is in intensive care?

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    #8

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Trish Smith
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yep, your almost two year old had such an enlightened learning experience AND built that sandcastle?? You really expect someone to believe that??

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    #9

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Delta Dawn
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There’s no boring chicken, only boring people.

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    JR’s ‘The Best of LinkedIn’ social media project is a great archive showing how even the most seasoned professionals can feel insecure about themselves. It’s a slippery slope when you start making up stories for clicks.

    Don’t even get us started on how ridiculous it is to try and motivate people while humble-bragging in between the lines. Look, nobody says that LinkedIn has to be super serious all the time (we actually rather enjoy some of the fun, quirky, and artistic posts that fly across our feeds from time to time), however, it’s downright embarrassing when industry veterans go all out and think they’re the next big ‘self-help’ guru.

    Now, that’s not to say that motivation and finding joy within and beyond the rat race aren’t important (they are!), but it all really comes down to how you try and motivate people. Copying someone else’s post, borrowing someone else’s ideas with a few small tweaks, downright faking entire experiences just so you have something to feed your followers doesn’t reflect well on you.

    #10

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Hawkmoon
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And then I realized that the water on my nightstand had turned into wine. Or the opposite, I don't remember the timing well.

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    #11

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Marcel Beisel
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    you learned how to abuse people and try to make the same s**t now they did to you. wow.

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    #12

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Lee Macro
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's a long winded way to say "I'm a d*ck"

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    It speaks less about you as a ‘leader’ and more about your insecurities and desire for attention. If you’re feeling creatively bankrupt, it’s perfectly fine to take some time off: get off social media. Take a break. Fight that burnout! It’s way better than flooding LinkedIn with trite stories and ‘inspirational’ stories that make people’s eyes roll. And yes, we might be low-key judging anyone who writes, “So true!!!” in the comments.

    If you genuinely enjoy a post, good for you. But like it or not, there’s just way too much pretense online. Especially on LinkedIn where you pretty much are what you say you are.

    LinkedIn does have its upsides, though. When you make an account and polish up your profile, you’re putting yourself out there for recruiters to see. You become far more visible. You can find jobs that you like way more easily. And (probably best of all) you can actually connect with professionals from all around the world.

    #14

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Bart
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Stop watching porn maybe, you will get less spam...

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    Need some advice on publishing a book, learning to program, or how to raise your EQ stats? Well, there are tons of people who’d be happy to help you, as long as you’re polite and genuine. Of course, there are some pros who would ignore or even look down on someone asking for advice, but hey, those are the rules of social networks, right

    You’re bound to get some jerks in every community. In our experience, the vast majority of people using LinkedIn have been phenomenal and super friendly. Then again, we haven’t chatted with many folks who thrive on bragging.

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    #16

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Gul Dukat
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's like raiii-iiin, on your wedding day,

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    #17

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Kevin Garren
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    All this BS has caused me to throw up in my mouth. Also, "Keillor" isn't a name, it sounds like a hipster low fat liquor. But hey, at least he didn't pretend the scan was real lol

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    #18

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    BadCat
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is the human sweatshirt really made out of 100% human?

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    Career coach Jermaine Murray, from JupiterHR, previously told Bored Panda that ‘turbo-charging’ your LinkedIn profile can lead to greater visibility and success. In his opinion, first impressions matter. However, they might not be overly long-lasting. That means that if you make a mistake on your LI profile, it’s not the end of the world: you can recover from this.

    #19

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Ange Marsden
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Confirm for us school teachers - that does not look like a kid's handwriting or vocabulary...

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    #21

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Laika-Mutton
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seriously? And then he made them pose for a picture? Good grief =/

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    “You can always improve your profile and show up in a Recruiter’s future search based on the SEO algorithms on LinkedIn. Also, if someone is a good Recruiter, they wouldn’t discount someone’s profile in the future because good people make bad resumes on LinkedIn all the time,” Jermaine told us during an earlier interview.

    #22

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Ange Marsden
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You'll get more value out saying the word Harvard than connecting with Jonathan. Think about that for a second.

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    #23

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Lizzy Crit
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My handwriting looks like a chicken with a seizure disorder wrote it. I'm better off sending an email

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    From the career coach’s perspective, LinkedIn is a “super powerful and useful tool for surfacing and connecting” with other people. LI can handle most of your professional needs. However, interactions elsewhere, on the net and in real-life, can also be useful for your career.

    “I’ve found LinkedIn to be more effective after I’ve built rapport with people on a different platform (like Twitter) or at a networking event (pre-Covid), as it’s a great way to stay in touch,” the career expert said.

    #25

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Brandon Marlowe
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Shortly after the restaurant "went silent" they all burst into applause. The restaurant owner then shouted, "drinks on the house!" and loaded them all up in a fleet of limousines to drive everyone to his palatial estate where they all lived happily ever after.

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    #26

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    KJ
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Because nobody needs downtime to recharge, honest!

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    #27

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Ange Marsden
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Where I come from a push mower is the kind without an engine...

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    According to Jermaine, people usually don’t give themselves enough credit for their skills. They need to be less modest about themselves and the value that they bring.

    “When I have sessions with clients, the first exercise we do is a Success/Failure log where they can beat their chest a bit but also dissect and really understand that ‘failure’ because, more often than not, that Failure can actually lead to a win/success further down the line,” he shared.

    #28

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Gul Dukat
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This looks like a rose growing out of a butt

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    #30

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Nathaniel
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    -Cold call at their house at 10pm at night. -Show up at their kids school at the end of the school day. -Install 24 hour monitoring in their house secretly so you know when they are not busy and can take your call.

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    #31

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Caro Caro
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Gary states he helps build an engaged audience ... This was NOT engaging Gary.

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    #32

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    FabulousMari
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well I see SOMEONE is fluent in meaningless corporate jargon. I hope he said his vows this way.

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    #34

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Donkey boi
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I eat mine slathered in so much butter it dribbles all over my chin. I attack the cob like a feral dog, getting little flecks of yellow all over my face. By the time I'm done I look like a demented person. Actual phot of me after eating corn on the cob attached: Me-eating-...d749f1.jpg Me-eating-62eb82ed749f1.jpg

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    #35

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Stéphane Lussier Johnson
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And then all the pumpkins from the loaf came back to life and clapped

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    #36

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

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    #37

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Gul Dukat
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    if you really think parenting will be similar to marketing and business, you're in for a rude awakening, smh

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    #38

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    $cagsy
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nice sentiment, emotions are for everyone. But. He's 'crying on the phone to his wife'. There is no phone and this chap probably went to the 'Amber Heard School of Crying'. #sadfacenotears

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    #39

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Kevin Garren
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why is having a home less important to him? Also, best thing about working at home should be using your own bathroom. Let's be real.

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    #40

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Gul Dukat
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    this is way too much personal information. I don't even know you.

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    #41

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Jill Rhodry
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The kid wasn't be empathetic - he just wanted a donut, knew you wouldn't do it for him but that you would do it for yourself.

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    #42

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

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    #44

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

    BestofLinkedin Report

    Trish Smith
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No, it means, "This post doesn't belong on LinkedIn!"

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    #45

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

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    Emmydearest
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But were they wearing lipstick? Because that's what matters...

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    #47

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

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    Jill Rhodry
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "understand that banter is JUST banter" translates to: I'm going to sexually harass you and you're not allowed to complain...it's JUST banter.

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    #48

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

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    Nathaniel
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Being a share holder is not a work background.....

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    #49

    People-Stories-Best-Of-Linkedin

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    Bored Retsuko
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Scares the f*ck out of everybody else"? Wow, this guy must devour his pizza even more savagely than I do.

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    #50

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    G M
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don’t understand this at all. What does “I’m going to take a break for Saturday“ mean and why is it his reply to a yes or no question?

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    #51

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    Kevin Garren
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No, they're out crashing their Lambo showing off so they have to buy a new one.

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    #52

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    James016
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm sure that we will cope without you

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    #55

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    Mr.Kris
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But then I had to plug my daughter in as she was in need of a recharge...

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    #56

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    Katy McMouse
    Community Member
    Premium
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm sorry, but is that picture even real?

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    #57

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    KJ
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    LinkedIn influencer is a job? Wow.

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    #58

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    les
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    cant find a job? have you considered slavery?

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    #59

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    Lee Macro
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Probably listening to him drone on about the art of strategic storytelling.....the closer I am to my bed the better methinks

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    #60

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    Vladislav Antonyuk
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ehhh, so the moral is "not putting everything for a company might actually save your life" or what?

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    #61

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    Donkey boi
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I was a horny teenager, I used to call it "people watching" as well. PERVING Sean, it's called perving!

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    #62

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    Lizzy Crit
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm not wasting 2 minutes watching a video. I'll skim the email though.

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    #63

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    SykesDaMan
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When it takes more time to write the hashtags than the -not so short though- post they are attached to...

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    #64

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    #65

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    Well-Dressed Wolf
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    TRAGIC REMINDER: I’m using some other family’s pain and suffering to toot my own horn and promote myself!

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    #66

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    Kathryn Baylis
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just f*****g order the shoes online, a*****e, and quit wasting working people’s time. The salesperson told you flat out that they don’t have the shoes in stock, explaining it’s through no fault of their own, but because NIKE just isn’t sending them to small local retailers. That was all you needed to know.

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    #67

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    loty moty
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, finishing 4 year college in 6 years with 2.6 GPA does tell us something about your character.

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    #69

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    Gul Dukat
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    with this tight schedule, I wouldn't have time to post online about it...but then I also don't have a nanny

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    #70

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    Well-Dressed Wolf
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Even his profile picture looks smug. Also: how is driving a Tesla a “flex” these days? They’re not a new brand any more or even really one of those “omg you drive a TESLA?? How COOL!” car brands. Hell, my 46-year-old still-lives-at-home virgin sister has a Tesla. (I have a 20-year-old Volkswagen van. /flex)

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    #71

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    Nathaniel
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "60% of the time, it works every time" Brian Fontana.

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    #73

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    Show thyself
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    #madeupkidthursday --- kid (6y/o) shoves tax-report to me "there's an error! You can save some money here & here!" •°• #realkidthursday --- kid (6y/o) somehow got grubby, little hands on tax-report... scribbles tiny monsters/animals/plants/etc all over it

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    #74

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    Lizzy Crit
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Please. Patients do that all the time.

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    #76

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    Kevin Garren
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Stop lying, nobody comes to your parties. You probably don't even have a son.

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    #77

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    Mattewis88
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd say this says he's jealous of people who have more hair on their chin than he has on his head.

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    #78

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    Aahzmandus Pervect
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hiring manager: Why would I hire you? Me: I don't know, you are the one looking for new employees

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    #79

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    Donkey boi
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You can't teach psychopathy or sociopathy, Matt. Besides, that's not quite how it works. There is ZERO fear, no voice inside saying we can't do it, the voice is saying 'How do I do it without getting caught'. Once it's done the voice changes to 'Do it again, do it again!', only this time it wasn't as thrilling, so we end up chasing that high, often taking higher risks or pushing the boundaries to make it more exciting. In our single mindedness our world starts to crumble until we either gain control and fight the addiction or fail in a dramatic fashion and destroy ourselves, either way, our habit will end.

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    #81

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    Well-Dressed Wolf
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would hate to have this guy for a dad. I had a great dad who, you know, answered the questions I had when I was a kid. Even the “why?” ones. Like a normal parent.

    #82

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    Albino
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Did they specify the year? Don't expect it to be this year.

    #83

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    #84

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    Gul Dukat
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "See you everyday folks." I take this as a threat.

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    #85

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    Stéphane Lussier Johnson
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How do you "nearly" chip a tooth? It's either chipped or it's not. Words like "nearly", "almost" and "barely" are used to complain about events and consequences that didn't happen. Just like that story.

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    #86

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    Jordi Sharpe
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wear a hat because I have a receding hairline, and I'm vain. See? One sentence!

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    #89

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    James016
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is this how you announced it to family? I hope you did so they know you are unhinged

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    #91

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    #92

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    Nathaniel
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I used the toilets at Harvard, and I ate at the cafeteria at Harvard. I lost my virginity to a prostitute whilst at Harvard.

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    #93

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    keighterz
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This doesn’t seem like an improbable conversation. Five-year-olds know more than people think. Especially if a kid saw their parent working on the same things all the time. Not sure why she felt the need to share such a pointless conversation no one cares about tho

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    #94

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    James016
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You may have an un-diagnosed sensory processing disorder

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    Well-Dressed Wolf
    Community Member
    3 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your kid will loathe you if you do this to him for his 13th birthday. You know those FaceBook posts from parents who are like “my son and I only speak once a year, now that he’s an adult and has moved out”? This is how it starts.

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    #99

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    Mirt
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well thanks for the heads up you are short and hairy

    #100

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    Well-Dressed Wolf
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Never take NO for an answer, even if she says she doesn’t want to go out with you! -Brandon

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    #101

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    Mirt
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I looked at the upped left. Your hair makes me laugh

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    #102

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    Nathaniel
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And a post like this from Matt is "content"? Okay.

    #103

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    #104

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    Nathaniel
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "...I watch her through my binoculars, I watch her in her apartment at night to make sure she if safe."

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    Gul Dukat
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If the old man can't write as good as the others, he shouldn't try "helping" them

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    #106

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