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Someone Asked “What Ended Your Friendship With Your Best Friend?” And 30 People Got Honest
Contrary to what we would like to believe, friendships don't last forever. Even the best ones.
So when Reddit user gli-tc-h made a post on the platform, asking everyone to share what caused their BFF breakups, they got a collection of honest, heartfelt replies — I guess it's something we all just need to get off our chests.
From secret affairs with their partner to evil schemes that were supposed to get them fired, continue scrolling to learn what these folks have experienced. Who knows, maybe their stories will help you navigate your own personal dramas.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
When my father was dying of cancer, my “best friend” called me to catch up and I told him about it and he nonchalantly said “your dad's dying because he isn’t praying enough and that he would be healed if someone spoke in tongues over him” I was in disbelief that he got roped into the insane religious cult like his parents.
I told him that was the grossest thing I could ever hear from him and hung up. My father died 2 weeks later. It’s been two years and he hasn’t called or texted once. Good f*****g riddance. F**k you tim.
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
I'd be just as angry if someone called me to tell me something like that in this situation...worse yet my best friend.
Llama_flower93 3 years ago
God isn't our puppet. Prayer isn't some magical action we can do to get everything we want. He should have offered to pray for you and then supported you either way in that difficult time. Christians are meant to love others. He was not loving you by doing that. "Weep with those who weep" is a very significant verse in the Bible.
Solidhog 3 years ago
Why is it we are led to believe that religion is all forgiving, all accepting and all caring and yet the most racist, callous, violent and offensive people I have met have been deeply religious people. Even today in the UK at this moment there are running battles because one group think the other insulted their imaginary friend.
Michael Largey 3 years ago
Not all "deeply religious" people worship a god. Some worship their egos and call it "God".
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Archer Harris 3 years ago
I am so sorry. I get so angry at people who say that the reason why a bad thing is happening to them is because their not praying enough. I am a Christian myself but nothing like those people. There is no amount a prayer that can save you when your time has come to see God. You can pray for healing but that doesn’t mean you will absolutely be healed.
Libstak 3 years ago
Faith is a lot more sincere if you can recognise that a material world will engender every manner of material outcomes but your place with God beyond death will be your eternal peace in the end. Would we know true happiness if we have not tasted sorrow?
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Misty Moon 3 years ago
I am so sorry for your loss and sorry that the ignorance of a "friend" didn't help you when you needed support.
We managed to get in touch with gli-tc-h and the Redditor agreed to have a little chat with us.
"[At the time of making this post], I had just ended one of the longest friendships I've ever had," they told Bored Panda. "I wouldn't call him a best friend but whatever."
"I didn't really expect for [the post] to gain so much traction but soon after, I realized that it is quite a popular topic, there were recurring themes such as just drifting apart due to moving, family matters, and some to do with taking spouses. There were a few stating that the friendship ended when it became more intimate."
RELATED:
#2
My husband at the time had to step away from his job because he was dealing with pretty severe mental health issues. We had a young child and I was a stay-at-home mom and it was really devastating not only financially, but socially as a lot of our social life revolved around his job and work friends.
I was really good friends with a coworker’s wife. The coworker moved into my husband’s (higher up) position when my husband had to resign. We had to sell our home since we couldn’t make the mortgage payment anymore. The friend came to help me pack, and while doing so told me that they always knew this would happen because the Lord had revealed it to the husband in a dream several years earlier. They had basically been waiting around for my husband to “fail” so that coworker could “succeed” and fulfill the Lord’s prophesy.
Yeah no. Said goodbye to her, moved out of state, and never looked back. I won’t tolerate people using religion to be d***s.
Marla 3 years ago (edited)
The almighty, the omnipresent and omnipotent power of all that ever was and all that will ever be is mainly concerned with the politics surrounding mid-level office management
Michael Largey 3 years ago
So what she was admitting was that she couldn't get a promotion without divine intervention.
ERIKA H. 3 years ago (edited)
Just an fyi for anyone else who may go through a mental health crisis while working - look into if you have Leave Of Absence options. This will allow you to take longer time off work without having to quit/lose your job (it is separate from PTO). If at the end of the LOA you still feel like you're not ready to come back to work, you can look into an extension or make the decision to resign. Short term and long term leave of absence usually falls under medical, but can extend to other areas as well (non medical related issues). You just need written paperwork that LOA is reccomended by your doctor or psychiatrist (not psychologist or therapist - they are not recognized as medical professionals). Edit: spelling
Jane Cortez 3 years ago
It is such utter twisted manipulative sh*r when people use religion to stomp on others while they are down, cover their greed, agendas, inferiority and cruelty. Someone once told me that the ‘people who go to church are the ones who have the most reasons to feel guilty.’ Idk but based on how many posts I’ve read here it just seems to reinforce it! I hope that you and your husband are in a much better place now. Good riddance to her and her husband!
According to a study by scientists from Aalto University in Finland and the University of Oxford in England, our social circle shrinks soon after our mid-20s.
The teams analyzed data from 3 million mobile phone users to identify the frequency and patterns of whom they contacted and when, as well as overall activity within their networks.
Men and women were socially promiscuous – making more and more friends and social contacts – until the age of 25, after which point they started losing them rapidly, with women losing them at an initially faster rate than men.
#3
Bacterial meningitis ….after a few days of unanswered calls ( thought maybe I had pissed her off) I drove over to her house. Found my BFF deceased on the couch. Her 5 year old had luckily survived several days on her own.
JessG 3 years ago
FIVE days?! Why wasn't anybody worried?! School? Relatives? Friends? Wasn't anyone wondering where they were all that time? Wow. Poor child, I hope she's ok
Aria Whitaker 3 years ago
Well, it said a FEW days...could be three. Still awful though.
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Tammy 3 years ago
Oh hon, this breaks my heart. I'm so so sorry. I hope her child is doing ok. I hope you're going ok.
Vesuvius 3 years ago
I found this on Reddit: Her daughter ended up in foster care for a short time and then adopted by a wonderful family.
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Vanja Vidovic 3 years ago
And that is why it is really important to say to someone when you are angry with them. Never just go silent, ghosting is a little kids' business.
Nene Miu Miu 3 years ago
Vanja Vidovic I think I see your point And greets important to never stop communicating with someone, especially if angry or unhappy. It's not Clear if that is what happened between the original poster and her friend...
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The average 25-year-old woman contacts about 17.5 people per month, while a man contacts 19.
(This decline continues for the rest of our life, or at least until retirement, where it plateaus, probably due to reduced data among this age group.)
Scientists theorize that around this age, people begin to decide who is most important – and valuable – in their life and make a greater effort to hold on to those friends. This, as a result, hurts other relationships.
#4
In 2020, my mom was diagnosed with cancer. At this time by grandfather was also fighting colon cancer; both of whom were in the “high risk” category for covid-19.
During the first summer of the pandemic, I would occasionally share things on social media about why it’s important to make up and social distance, then later on why people should get vaccinated.
Well, my ex best friend married a complete right-wing trumper POS that thought covid was a sham. He commented on one of my posts and we got in a mildly heated debate. Eventually, he said that he didn’t care that people would die, and that it’s a sacrifice to make for everyone’s freedoms.
When I expected my ex best friend to come to my aid, she backed him up. I was sickened. Have not ever spoken a word to either of them since.
I say good riddance.
deanna woods 3 years ago
Trump's bs has ruined so many friendships and family relationships. Covid is real and I will never understand why people still refuse to take it seriously.
Jon Robinson 3 years ago
Its weird how they can both repeat Trumps BS about it being fake but at the same time point to Trumps "warp speed" vaccine project as an example of one of his successes
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Azolane 3 years ago
I cut all ties with one of my friends during the worst of covid. Her facebook page was riddled with conspiracy theories, but I couldn't take it anymore when she started comparing the lockdown to the Holocaust. What the hell is wrong with these nut jobs ???
Elaine Roberts 3 years ago
I lost a couple of friends over it, too. One believed literally every conspiracy out there. I just couldn’t take anymore of her bs and blocked her.
Load More Replies... Nicole Weymann 3 years ago
That "freedom over health" argument sucks rocks. First of all freedom is a gradual thing. There's no such thing as complete freedom anyway, because there's always rules to obey, be it laws, customs or physics. And second for some reason it's always others who are implicitly expected to pay with their health or life AND freedom (because life in an IC unit is not noteworthy for its abundance in possibilities, recreational, legal or anywise).
Scott Rackley 3 years ago
Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Notice which is first.
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Leo Domitrix 3 years ago
SO sorry what? People have to die pointlessly for Trumpies to not wear masks? Really? In what insane asylum does that make sense?
Stephanie A Mutti 3 years ago
People that are willing for sacrifices for the greater good FREQUENTLY are not the ones that will have to make the sacrifice and they only mean the good for themselves. Not always! But the louder they are about it, the more likely they're asking for someone else to sacrifice.
Elaine Roberts 3 years ago
These “freedom above all” types are happy for people to die as collateral damage, as long as those people aren’t them or their loved ones.
Melissa 3 years ago
They are typically the same ones that claim to be pro-life.
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SweetCheesySpaghetti 3 years ago
Had the exact same experience with a friend of 18 years. She has adopted her husband's super right wing Trump-loving conspiracy theory obsessed thinking (COVID was just the flu - as in, they renamed the flu Covid-19 to make money off vaccinations and scare the American people into submission). I don't talk to either of them anymore.
“Once you’ve made decisions and found the appropriate people, you can be much less socially promiscuous and invest your time in these people,” said Robin Dunbar, a professor of evolutionary psychology at the University of Oxford who co-authored the paper.
“But they can’t be just anybody,” he added.
Narrowing down the people you're close to includes friendships as well as life partners, particularly for women, due to the support and help they can provide in times of need.
#5
my own transphobia
i've told this story countless amount of times now, but i'll say it again.
i had a crush on this person, ever since i was in 4th grade. always tried to be close to them, and half the time, i was. best friends, we trusted each other with every secret, told each other things we wouldn't tell anyone else. one day, they finally came out and told me they were trans and identified as a male.
i was devastated. my crush suddenly comes out as trans? this has to be a stupid trend, right? i acted cool at first, heavy emphasis on ACTED. i tried to remain friends but they definitely noticed me drifting away. one day, out of my dumb horny state, angry that my crush was a male, i came to them saying i was having a crisis and ghosted them for f*****g months.
didn't talk to them in the halls, didn't contact them afterwards, they were probably worried sick about. they eventually noticed this behavior and at somepoint, blocked me on all platforms. me, unable to speak with them, saw them in the halls of school one day and thought "huh, they look kinda cute" and realized i was still attracted to them.
i left them in a vulnerable state, in a confusing time, for f*****g nothing besides transphobia. since then, i've tried to find anyway to make contact with them. not to reconsile our friendship or give a shot at dating, but so i can say i'm sorry. i just hope they're successful in life, that's it. i just hope they didn't let a dumba** like me dictate their emotions and feelings. i was a huge jerk who didn't deserve them at all.
ever since, i've been making attempts to be less bigoted. more open, less misogynistic. i just don't want a repeat of last time, and don't want anyone to go through what they did.
my only real friend, the only one who actually cared about me, who would go through hell and back for me, pick me up when i'm broken and down, pushed away by my own f*****g transphobia.
sorry for the long read, i just don't like settling for small paragraphs. even then, i don't think this did it justice.
AppletreeChild 3 years ago
Gotta be honest... I don't think it actually is "transphobia". I mean, I only read this story, don't know deeper issues or whatnot... But it just sounds like the shock had a stronger grasp on his consience than his feelings. It sounds like he was scared of the change the coming out implied aswell as him questioning his own feelings for that person... sad alltogether but great steps into the future :)
Random Person 3 years ago
Yeah sounds more like internalized homophobia to me.
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Jus 3 years ago
It's because it was love, not just friendship. If I was in love and someone came out as trans, it would be the end of my love as well. Because it would be impossible to love and marry, to be together as a couple. It would be so disappointing... Maybe for the other person it was just friendship, but the guy was clearly in love. I feel sorry for him.
Bewitched One 1 year ago
How would it be impossible? Trans people get married all the time. If you LOVED THEM, it shouldn’t matter what they are or identify as. THEY are still the same person you “love”. Sounds like this WASNT love but like OP said, a crush, because if you really LOVE someone, you should love them for them. Nothing more and nothing less. If my finance (cis male) told me he feels like he is actually a woman, my feelings for him(her) wouldn’t change. Because I love who they are as a person. Same with my kids and anyone else in my life.
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MalayDragon 3 years ago
You made a mistake and have owned it - I applaud you for realising that it was wrong and making steps to apologise. Have you managed to make any progress how're things now?
Nandros M 3 years ago
OP is talking about ONE friend/person/crush/whatever. Can somebody explain to me why he uses terms like "them" and "they" (plural)? It is not the first time I see this.
Blitzø 3 years ago
Because some people use they/them pronouns the same way some people use she/her, he/him, or any other pronouns. OP is using they/them out of respect for their friend.
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Personally, gli-tc-h thinks that it's "possible to keep a friend for most if not your entire life without falling out, but it all depends on if you have the same interests and ... [whether or not] your personalities clash. There are a whole bunch of cases where friendships last a lifetime."
And the secret is, you guessed it, talking. "A million factors go into a lifelong friendship and no two friendships are alike, but there is one key thing that all ride-or-die friendships have in common – crystal clear communication," Lori Harder, author of A Tribe Called Bliss: Break Through Superficial Friendships, Create Real Connections, Reach Your Highest Potential and host of the Earn Your Happy podcast said.
You and your BFF won't be the same people as years go by. So you won't have a successful relationship without speaking up about your ever-changing needs, desires, and expectations.
#6
I was diagnosed with bipolar after a very traumatic and public event when I was manic for the first time. Lost all my friends including my best friend. Mental illness sucks.
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
It's not your fault. I hope you make a new best friend and they'll be an even bester best friend!
AxleMunshine001 3 years ago
Obviously they were not your friends. Nothing like finding yourself in a crisis to know where people stand in your life.
Michael Largey 3 years ago
The op has an emotional disability and is aware of it. Those "friends" also have one , but they aren't.
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Rens 3 years ago
Chronic illnesses and mental health illnesses are one very good way to figure out who your real friends are x
deanna woods 3 years ago
Mental illness does suck, but it lets you know who really cares about you and who doesn't. My mental illness has shown me how awesome my family is.
Misty-Dawn Amayi 3 years ago
The performing and creative arts have many opportunities for you to get a career and be among peers who will either be able to relate, or, will be supportive. I think you have a good chance of making more compatible relationships moving forward from this with the new knowledge and a good self care and therapy foundation.
#7
I had a good friend in 8th grade who was a very kind and affectionate person.
Never had a crush on her at all.
We were physically affectionate people, never sexual. She would mess with my hair, and sometimes put her hand on my leg, so I did the same.
At the time, her boyfriend was aware of our relationship, and was cool with it, I even was good friends with him.
One day, I got called to the principals office and I walked into my mother, father, principal, and a police officer asking me to sit down. I felt like someone I knew died, but no, they said that she had accused me of sexually assaulting her.
I spent 2 hours crying, giving them my phone, watching them comb through my texts, reviewing, video footage, and interviewing the boyfriend and the girl.
In the end, she lied to her parents because she got caught that she was dating her boyfriend, and used me as a scapegoat, and saying her boyfriend hit her.
The police called my household and said that I was free, and that if we wanted to sue, we would win.
The rest of the year, anytime I saw her, I walked away and threw up because I felt like I was a monster.
After severe depression, I sat in my room and got over it.
The following years, the boyfriend and I would joke about it all the time.
Good man, terrible friend girl.
Aubrey Theo 3 years ago (edited)
Oh hellllll nah. Had a similar thing happen back in the eight grade where i hid behind a door from my apparent best friend because she kept asking me to tickle her and physically wrestle her. I noped outta there and she started telling people i was emotionally abusive because i stopped being friend w her. Some people dont think it seems. We had been friends for around 7 years by then but that was the last straw.
Load More Replies... deanna woods 3 years ago
People don't seem to understand that accusations like that can get people arrested and sometimes killed.
Misty Moon 3 years ago
Wow..What a pos she is. I'm sorry you went thru that. It's chicks like that who make it really hard for women to come forward when they actually been thru something bad.
Paddling Panda 3 years ago
This. It infuriates me. Having been abused and sexually assaulted, I loathe women like this. Thank you for your comment.
Load More Replies... M 3 years ago (edited)
Decades ago, once had a GF who said that if I broke up with her, she would throw herself down a staircase and tell everyone that I did it, and "Who do you think they'll believe?" I was over a foot taller than her and I'm non-white, so she probably would've been right. But I told a bunch of friends about her threat, just in case.
Weirdest Bi You’ll Ever Meet 3 years ago
That reminded me of a “ex” I had. She was extremely bipolar and narcissistic. I dated her like three times (one time when we “broke up” she said before hand that she loved me then she said that she was straight and basically dumping me.) She stole from me and asked for every belonging I had INCLUDING a headband I wore to my parents WEDDING. I invited her to Aquatica for my birthday celebration and she stole sunglasses and BLAMED ME. She claimed she had every mental disease like Ticks, schizophrenia, seizures (and would act out the seizures right in front of me), DID, and more stuff major like that. She would claim her grandma was abusive (they would get into regular scream-fights because the grandma didn’t know how to raise a child). My mom is trying to help her (my mom has 20+ years of been a parent) She broke her own wrist when he “boyfriend” broke up from her because she was getting to handsie. She slammed her wrist against a pole using MY BRACELET SHE STOLE to assist.
Dre Mosley 3 years ago
Reading that made me angry. Imagine thinking someone is your best friend, only to have them hit you with a sexual assault charge. She broke you emotionally and could have ruined your life.
AppletreeChild 3 years ago
I'm at a loss for words. I read these all the time and keep asking what is going through these peoples heads? Like... why?... Just... why?
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
Oh wow. I can't begin to imagine what stress that was like to deal with.
Kantami Blossom 3 years ago
I had a friend like that when I was a wean. We were very close and would tell each other everything and when a new lassie moved in next door to me and was in our class at school we all hung out together for months until one day at school the two of them decided to accuse my older brother of touching them inappropriately and actually for some reason tried to use me as a witness against him. They only admitted that they were lying when my mother went mental at the school for questioning me and my brother without an adult present and said she would be contacting police and consulting a lawyer. I sadly had to share a class with both lassie's for another two years and I refused to acknowledge their existence, we live in a bad area where an accusation like that could easily have gotten my brother killed but what angered me the most was she felt like I would back up their lies(she recently tried to contact me on social media, it's been over 25 years and still want nothing to do with her).
#8
She was very pro-life, and shamed me for being pro choice and pro women, even though she had an abortion at 15 and it literally saved her life. I instantly cut ties with her. Dropped 10 years of friendship with one sentence. Never looked back.
Kate Jones 3 years ago
My mother is this way. My parents are both staunchly pro-life but my mom paid for my brother's old girlfriend to get 2 abortions. They were both drug addicted at the time and it was absolutely the right decision but I knew about it and she made me promise to never tell my dad because he would never forgive her. And it would be one thing if she just kept her mouth shut but she's a big Trumper, conservative sign waiver and it's totally hypocritical. So one time we were arguing about abortion rights and she's arguing with me like I don't know she literally drove the girl to the clinic. Like, do you have amnesia or something? So I scared her once and made it seem like I was about to talk about it in front of my dad and her eyes bugged out like 'no please don't'. I didn't, because I'm not going to cause problems in my family but so many people feel like their problems are different or they are different somehow and don't have to live by their own beliefs but expect others to.
TheElderNom 3 years ago
There is this Danish TV-series that handled almost exactly this really beautifully. It is quite old and took place in the fifties maybe, I don't recall. But this "abortions are okay in my situation, but not for anyone else" was nicely brought up there. And they really did a good job in showing the hypocrisy of it. At least as I recall, I saw it like fifteen to twenty years ago.
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Leo Domitrix 3 years ago
Yep. I'm losing a friend that way. Anti-choice laws nearlly killed her in her 20s, and she had a teen abortion b/c of a rape, but by golly she's pro-fetus. She'd sooner see soeone die than lose their fetus or their guns. I just don't know who she is anymore. :-(
Stephanie A Mutti 3 years ago
There is a political segment lately who very strongly believe rules apply to everyone else but not them.
Kate Jones 3 years ago
And it would be one thing if she used to believe in it and then changed her mind over the years. People can certainly do that but she was just as against it back then. It's impossible to talk to them about almost anything because there are lots of little things I could point out but don't because, despite this and their reprehensible positions, I love them and don't want to hurt them. They're in their 70s and it just feels like it's not worth doing that to them. But it really drives me nuts.
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Nicki 3 years ago
My best friend since high school became super pro-life (and a trumper later on) and I had just had my first miscarriage after my husband and I were trying to have our first child, I was 27 at the time. She told me it was my fault because I had an abortion in high school (I wasn't ready to have a kid yet), and that god was punishing me. Then one of the last things she said to me was, "If someone came in here right now with a gun and asked me to pick someone to kill, I would chose Ted (her husband) because I know he is going to heaven." I told her to get out and never spoke to her again...She did this a week after I had my miscarriage and I was still grieving.
Rylosalex 3 years ago
I'm so sorry for your loss, your former friend is terrible and I'm glad that you cut ties. Thinking good thoughts and sending strength to you.
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Richard Anderson 3 years ago
A friend in our group in high school got knocked up and we all pooled our money together so she could get an abortion. She is a Morman and a state senator now. She is super MAGA conservative Trumpster and against abortion under any circumstance. I've read all her interviews, watched debates and she has had several opportunites to share her story and hasn't. I know it's her story to tell but it is part my story also. So far I havn't mentioned it to anyone except a couple close friends. I'm hoping someone in the group of friends says something before I do but they probably don't have a clue since she is on the other side of the country now using her husbands last name.
JelliTate 3 years ago
I wish all people that are hypocrites like this were outed!! (I know it’s mean but I still wish it.)
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Stylishsidewaysbird 3 years ago
I have a college acquaintance who did something similar. We were both premed and she was in an abusive relationship and got pregnant. She had a life epiphany, broke up with him and had an abortion. I always thought she was really brave for her choices. They couldn’t have been easy. She needed up going to med school in the Caribbean but has since dropped out. She found a guy that’s pretty religious and they are now engaged and she’s become increasingly churchy on social media. When Roe was overturned she went on fb and posted how she was so happy it was overturned because she had an abortion and has regretted it ever since and “god is now punishing her for her abortion because she recently had a miscarriage”. I am disgusted that she is happily touting she had a choice and made a choice to get an abortion but because she regrets it, she’s happy that others don’t have access to a safe choice.
Sophia L. 1 year ago
She can realise her mistake and be against it. Good for her for not being friends with a pro-murder
Tamra 1 year ago
Oh shut the hell up. Did you choose not to read the part where the abortion saved a 15 year old's life?? So sick of you holier-than-thou types who spout hyperbolic nonsense to demonize women in order to deny them of their RIGHT to have sovereignty over their own bodies.
Load More Replies... #9
She didn't invite me to her birthday party. It was my first time back from college and I would have been able to go. She made a whole Facebook event page and invited everybody but me. I found out through mutual friends, the kicker was no one showed up and she called me crying that this other girl didn't show up.
deanna woods 3 years ago
That happened to me. This girl invited all of our friends to her quincenera and not me. I later heard it was a disaster.
RandomFrog(He/They️️) 3 years ago
I recently learned what a quincenera was in Spanish class. I think it’s so fun all the celebrations and holidays that come with certain cultures. My goals are to go to a barmitzvah and a quincenera, and my family has started this thing where for the next four years we aren’t going to celebrate Christmas but another winder holiday like haunnika to see what it’s like.
Load More Replies... #10
He cheated on his wife with my girlfriend. Killed what I thought was two great relationships with one f**k.
Actually it was a lot more than that, but I liked the way it sounded.
Edit: Thanks all, it was a long time ago (30+ years), so plenty of time to get over it. For a very long time I held onto a lot of hatred towards the guy, but for some reason not my ex. I realized at some point that the hate was only harming me and not affecting him in any way so that helped me let it go.
Felice Coles 3 years ago
He and your ex will deal with the consequences forever. You: live well.
Michael Largey 3 years ago
I hope that's true. But the victimizers can let the past go as easily as the victim. Much, much more easily, in my experience.
Load More Replies... I'mNotARoboat 3 years ago
“Resentment is like drinking a poison and then waiting for the other person to die.”
#11
I got cancer twice. He didn't bother to call, text or visit. Oh, this was pre pandemic so the hospitals were allowing visitors.
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago (edited)
Sure we fall apart as we get older but when you friend has cancer and is in hospital you bloody make time to go see them. Not even a text or call? That's not a friend.
bored human 3 years ago (edited)
Same thing happened to me. I got diagnosed with Lupus and was having many complications. When I texted my best friend of 10 years, he just decided not to reply to it. He stopped picking up my calls too
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KnightOwl 3 years ago
Unfortunately this is very common. A huge % of cancer patients report losing a lot of friends during treatment, it's also fairly common to lose friends when you're diagnosed with any type of chronic health issues or disability.
Leoninus Fate 3 years ago
better than my bf at the time I got My cancer {Clean now!} that tried to push me out of his life at Christmas 2020 {got told on the 23 of dec I had it} cause he didn't think he could handle it if I died {i kicked his a$$ and still dated him for 2 years till he hurt me badly so I dropped him ha!}
Aunt Riarch 3 years ago (edited)
I've never understood this. Nobody likes hospitals, nobody likes seeing a dear friend shrink and fade. But for goodness sake, you are only watching it, not being it. Maybe I will understand one day, but I hope not
#12
Mental health, fell into depression which isolated me, and eventually made me forgotten by the world
Scarlett 3 years ago
That’s one reason why I’m grateful for my bff because she stayed even when I was distant and so deep in depression that I barely talked.
Gerald Ogden 3 years ago
You saved my life, make it all alright When I don't feel like talking You make sure I always see the daylight This. Just this. From Shinedown's "Daylight" I wear a semicolon in ink because I get that too. I'll be sitting in the crowd holding a sign saying "You got this."
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Keara Ritson 3 years ago
my bestfriend stayed even when i was so depressed i stopped talking entirely and would got to the school bathrooms and cry everyday
marianne eliza 3 years ago
Being forgotten by the world isn't always a bad thing. It can be freeing.
#13
He tried to get me fired from a job I hired him at as his boss
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
Well that's just very backstabbing...quite a Brutus move there. Even after you got him a job.
Greg Williams 3 years ago
Comparison kinda works, but Brutus only really killed Caesar because he deserved it, and he was taking another person under his wing with the intention to make consul.
Load More Replies... Sydney Smith 3 years ago
Wish we had A LOT more information on it since he could have been done for a number of things.
Dippin Dot 3 years ago
Aah yes.. the old “work with me then try to get me fired. My best friend from HS did this, all because she liked my then-boyfriend, who turned out to be a sh!those too. They are now married. Good riddance. They deserve one another.
thefaithfulspouse 3 years ago
This caused a flashback. Got a friend hired who then started a rumor i was having an affair with our boss.
Atopher Bot 3 years ago
Dealing with this right now. I don't understand how you can pull someone off the street, no education, no experience, and a few years later after so much training and development they throw you under the bus because you don't let them change processes without approval.
#14
Every single time that I would tell her I was interested in/talking to a guy, she would try to get with him. She was never successful but it hurt that she kept trying. I confronted her about this in a very nice and civil way and explained to her how I felt about this. She apologized profusely and promised it would never happened again. And then it happened again. I just immediately cut her off after that, no explanation or words needed. She knows what she did. Haven't spoken a word to her since
Kwj 3 years ago
I had a "friend" who did this too.. If i (we were teenagers) had a crush on a guy she would litterally fo after hin the second she knew I was interested in him. I drew the line when she tried to brake me and my (then) boyfriend up. 10 years of friendship down the drain, but I'm so much better off without her toxic behaviours in my life.
Misty-Dawn Amayi 3 years ago
This is why I dislike competitiveness. It's just an excuse to act on your insecurities and desires for dominance.
Microwaved Robot 3 years ago
My Goodness this was my Mother. She would try to steal mine and my Sister's Boyfriends/Husbands. She was a nasty piece of work.
Celtic Pirate Queen 3 years ago
Yeah, I have a sister like that. She never did it to me, but to our younger sister - repeatedly. I had already cut her toxic as* out of my life (for entirely separate reasons), but it took the other one a little longer.
Pheebs 3 years ago
Yeah, I had the opposite. Had a friend who accused me of trying to steal her boyfriends by “being pretty”. Never once did I try to flirt or interfere with her relationships. I was friendly with the guys, because they were her’s and I wanted her happy. I realize a lot was her self-esteem issues coming out, but I really didn’t know what to do to make things easier on her. It’s not like I could make myself look like I just crawled out of a ditch every time one of them was around. It didn’t help that most of my friends growing up were guys, so was generally chill when meeting them.
Misty Moon 3 years ago
Why do women do this c**p?! Especially to someone they call "friend"! I've had so many females do this to me-among other things, to the point that I resist making friends with women at all. :(
#15
she was my best friend for two years. we were in similar traumatic experiences and we helped each other throughout the 22 months we were best friends and we had a great friendship. we protected each other. one day she told me her father was back from jail and she was scared. i don't remember exactly what he went to jail for, but he was gone for about 6 years. she told me, on may eighteenth 2020, that she could not handle it anymore, that she was exhausted. two hours later, her older sister finds her and tells their grand parents and then me that she had hung herself. her exact words were: "im so sorry Grace, she's gone. my little sister is gone."
Weirdest Bi You’ll Ever Meet 3 years ago
I’m so sorry. I must have been hard. I was down there with your bestfriend. Know even though I don’t know you I support you! <3 🥺😅🙂
Paddling Panda 3 years ago
I know how she felt. I'm so sorry she was hurting so much that she needed to leave. I hope you will remember her with love and peace.
Nandros M 3 years ago (edited)
Very sad. OP did not explain why her friend was scared of her father. Was he an abuser/molester?
SilverSkyCloud 2 years ago
seems pretty obvious tbh why else would she have been scared of him?
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Leoninus Fate 3 years ago
iv actively saved a friend like this, they were doing the same, their uncle was .... there r@pest during her childhood/teen years, he finally got back out, and while he wasn't allowed near her... she was scared, she had a 5-year-old to, and I ended up staying at her place for 2 weeks {i didn't tell her but once she told her kid to kindergarten, he came to the house with me in it.... he didn't expect the 7'4 albino staring down at him and telling him if he showed up I would let him know how my boots tasted from bottom to top, it been 4 years and I know he moved out of state now, but I was scared to leave her alone and for those 2 weeks in fear of her giving up
#16
Over the years be became increasingly more abusive to his wife. She is a stay at home mom and he is out of town 9 months out of the year for work. He moved her from CA to TX after driving a wedge in every relationship she’d built there. She got a job in TX to get out of the house while the kids were in school. He didn’t like her having friends. He came home for the summer and discovered the owners of the kids’ daycare were lesbians, so he pulled them out because he “doesn’t want them thinking that is okay.” He took them home and told his wife she needs to quit her job because they kids don’t have daycare anymore. He will come home for the summer and smoke weed and do shrooms since he doesn’t get drug tested during that time. It was only okay for him. If she smokes, she is a “bad mom” because she cares more about drugs than she does the kids. He refuses to contribute to anything around the house - dishes, basic cleaning, garage, yard, feeding the kids - because he brings in 100% of the money. “Chores are the 100% her job”. He had an affair last summer for 2-3 weeks. He’d just disappear for a week at a time. When he’d come home and the kids asked where he was, he’d tell them “I needed a break from mommy.” He almost got caught so he broke off the affair. Trying to keep this short to maintain people’s interest, but the last straw was when he started locking his wife outside because she wouldn’t obey him. He hides the car keys so she can’t go anywhere and does not give her access to money. Essentially, he just makes her homeless at will whenever she doesn’t anticipate and tend to his every need. F**k that guy. I put up with it for so long because we’d been friends since high school and our kids are good friends. After he started locking his wife outside, I decided that I can’t be civil anymore. He is not welcome at my house. He is not welcome around my kids. He is not welcome to LOOK at my wife, because I know how he views women and the superiority he feels over them. Knowing he looks at her as sub-human really gets my blood boiling. I am ashamed that I ever called this poor excuse of a man my friend.
Aubrey Theo 3 years ago
I hope the wife got out safely with the kids, who knows what the sad excuse of a husband was doing behind closed doors
Elin Calliel 3 years ago
I was trapped in a relationship so very similar to this for 17 years. I know the absolute hell that it can be. I managed to get help and to escape and I owe my life to a shelter for victims of abuse. If you know of anyone in a situation like this please don’t stop supporting them and encouraging them to find the strength and courage and knowledge that helps to get themselves and the children out safely.
Elaine Roberts 3 years ago (edited)
He should have done something, but it sounds like he just backed out of their lives and left her to deal with it alone.
Load More Replies... Svenne O'Lotta 3 years ago
So you reached out to the wife and let her know that she isn't alone? Right? Right?
Memere 3 years ago
OP & his family is keeping in touch & they are ready to help when the wife is ready to leave. Read this: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/wiwo7f/comment/ijh9rs0/
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Amused panda 3 years ago (edited)
For those wondering the same as me, whether OP helped the wife get out of there before he dropped his friend, according to the original thread catfish_billy91 offered what help they can. It says they offered a place for her and the kids to stay, along with offering to cover the cost of her moving back to CA with the kids.
Cathleen Day 3 years ago
You might be ashamed, but have you offered the wife and kids a safe refuge should they need it? You've known about all this but kept quiet? You enabled your former friend through your silence. The lady needs help - he11 knows what else is going on behind closed doors!
Memere 3 years ago
He has offered to help. https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/wiwo7f/comment/ijh9rs0/
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Jessany Trotter 3 years ago
What a f*****g piece of s**t. Hope karma f***s him up real bad and his kids never speak to him when thy grow up, let alone his wife. Hope he dies alone.
SilverSkyCloud 2 years ago
i hope you did something to actually help her and her kids escape other than "hes not allowed at my house anymore"
Misty-Dawn Amayi 3 years ago
I was engaged to be married to a piece of trash like him. He dragged me out of the bed by my hair and pushed me down the stairs because I dared to take a nap after working a double on the farm before fixing supper. I was so scared and heartbroken at first. That night, when he was taking his nap, I ensured he'd end up in traction in the hospital while I moved on with my life. The amount of hate I had in my heart for his betrayal of my trust in and love for him took a lot to get over. What helped was that I moved on to a far superior quality of man, and though that sweet gentleman and I went our separate ways amicably many years ago, I'm so glad I had him in my life when I did. My relationships only improved afterward.
#17
He passed away at his job after we graduated high school. He worked at a asphalt creation center and fell 30ish feet into a boiling asphalt silo and boiled to death. He had just turned 18, and it was a few days before my 19th birthday.
Raven Null 3 years ago (edited)
sounds fast though. he fell from 30 feet, probably knocked him out. and if he didn't, his nerves probably went into overload
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Elaine Roberts 3 years ago
This is just horrible. A young life wasted and ended in such a terrible way.
#18
Time. We grew up, had kids, and moved apart.
Edit: I've know this guy since I was 6 or 7, which has now been 40+ years (ugh). He was my best friend, and I'd still consider him as such. We were both best men at each others' weddings, and I was the first non-family member invited to the hospital to hold his children after they were born.
Time just sneaks up on you - it's the small things to start with, and eventually, the relationship is still there but there's no significant time or contact spent on either side. We still text/call each other about 1-2 times a year about serious matters (family/jobs) but the regular "screwing around" time we used to have is done and gone. I know if either of us called the other and said "Hey, I need help ASAP" we'd both still drop whatever we were doing to help the other, but what I really miss is the small goofy interactions we used to have.
Felice Coles 3 years ago
Sometimes that level of goofy is just unsustainable. Nothing bad, just poignant.
Dawnieangel76 3 years ago
I had 3 best friends at different times in my life. Childhood best friend went off to college, and left me behind since I couldn't afford it. She forgot how a phone works, I suppose. Teen-Early 20's Best friend got married, moved away, and forgot how cellphones AND email work. Final best friend mid-20's to mid-30's best friend flat out told me she "wasn't interested" in bring friends anymore. No reason, no explanation, nothing. That was 10plus years ago & I'm still bitter & confused.
Wubba Lubba Dub Dub 3 years ago
My best friend growing up and I had this happen to us. I had a husband, have a daughter, she has three kids...I just wish her the very best from afar, I know she thinks the same of me and her calls and texts are always welcome, should they arrive 🖤
Leoninus Fate 3 years ago
that's still a best friend, you don't need to be with them 24/7 or be goofy or fun to make them a best friend, a best friend is someone that stick with you when you need it like they did
#19
My best friend was my cousin. Born the same year and raised together in nearby towns. We are from a purple state which bleeds more red every year. He turned Trump, very hard. This was a cult conversion. He didn't watch Fox, because theybwere part of the MSM (in fact they are!). He went to conspiracy reddits, 8chan and discord and decided "for himself" that only an outsider like Trump could "break the wheel" and bring a new voice into US politics. After that, nothing could turn him away. No moral failure, no policy failure, no amount of corruption. We finally cut everything off when I said his illegal immigrant wife ought to suffer the same consequences others do under Trump. He said THIS DOESNT APPLY TO HER. that was the end. It was a good friendship for 30 years.
Luke Branwen 3 years ago
Yeah, reminds me of my former best friend. That was before Trump - she started following Jordan Peterson and fell into some weird alt-right rabbit hole. The last straw for me was when she just casually mentioned she supports conversion therapy.
Yay Pandas! 3 years ago
I want to say that's worse than the MAGA people, but after thinking it's just as bad.
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Pg130 3 years ago
Sad politics came between family. Fact of the matter is they are all corrupt to some extent. It is simply a matter of voting between the lessor of two evils what with this failing two party system we have in America.
Memere 3 years ago (edited)
Yep. We seriously need term limits for Congress that are the same as for President - 2 terms and gone, and we need them now.
Load More Replies... Memere 3 years ago (edited)
I've cut off one of my brothers & only have contact with him 3-4 times/year now. All because of the Mango Mussolini. And a cousin-by-marriage who was a very fun, cool person went down the Covid conspiracy rabbit-hole & I cut her off over that because of things she said about doctors & nurses - my sister, niece, and a cousin are nurses & were risking their lives daily during the worst of the pandemic. Now she's gone all evangelical Christian too, believes that if you don't speak in tongues, you haven't really "received God & Jesus in your heart", smh
Night Owl 3 years ago (edited)
Wow. I'm so sorry that so many people you were close to went crazy :( That sucks
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Lisa Intally 3 years ago (edited)
So, the Greens/ lefties kept thinking Bush, Jr would be bad enough that everyone would finally go Green and that didn't happen. Nor did even someone as unbelievably horrible as Trump either. The left has to take a lesson from the right and get behind the person who has the best chance. Unequivocally. Period. I don't care if Democrat X is not as left as you want them to be, you gotta get out and vote for them or Democracy is over for us. If the Republicans get in meaningfully again, they are going to rally behind that POS and he will never be brought to justice.
Kathi Schäffer 3 years ago
"break the wheel"? he's Trump, not Daenerys... I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend! I know what it feels like to miss a person that no longer exists because they changed so much.
Janet C 3 years ago
The trump cult has destroyed a lot of friendships and even torn apart a lot of families.
Lisa Intally 3 years ago (edited)
Bobbi, Trump is a Reality TV star who did nothing for the US except botch the COVID response, alienate our allies, stand behind his bestie Putin and the NK dictator. (They are "in love" per Trump.) And that's not even Jan 6th or his latest crimes. The mind boggles on how anyone thinks anything he did was "good."
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#20
I got tired of always being the one to put forth any effort. Fly across the world to meet up, attend family gatherings, reach out, be patient, make sacrifice. It was good times when we were together. So it was worth it for a while but when she moved close and still never bothered to make an effort, I was over it. Wish her nothing but the best.
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
That sucks. Sometimes you try your best to make the effort and they just don't care. One day you'll find a friend who will reciprocate the effort just as you do.
#21
She cheated on this guy she was with almost constantly. She cheated on him while miscarrying his child. She cheated on him after she got a disease and he helped her learn to walk again. She cheated on him after he raised her son and took care of him like his own. She cheated on him after he dropped charges of assault against her and property damage. She cheated on him after she ruined his reputation in the town (he comes from a big family business) She cheated on him with the guy she left for him She cheated on him and then posted screenshots of him having a breakdown (of course only his messages) calling him abusive - and everyone on FB ate it up, ‘cause “single mom with a kid is being mistreated!” 🙃 After I confronted her about how awful she was being, she said, “If you’re not on my side, you’re not my friend.” 12 years of best friendship down the drain. Just like that.
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
Apart from your relationship, I feel really bad for the guy, like damn. Did someone check on him?
Local foodie 3 years ago
Some abuse victims think it’s their fault it happened and think that if they can “be better”, it won’t happen again. He definitely deserves better
Load More Replies... Misty-Dawn Amayi 3 years ago
I couldn't be friends with someone like her for very long. If that's how she treats a person who loves her, I'm thinking I'm not exempt.
#22
He died. Miss him. We met at 4 yrs old. Friends for about 30 years. He’s been gone 8 years now.
Hutt'nKloas 3 years ago (edited)
Can relate. Lost my best friend due to Covid. We knew eachother for over 30 years and always have been there for eachother, shared almost everything we had or experienced. Even ended up in a few hairy situations where we stood back to back. Then came COVID. It took 1 week before ending up in the IC, another 6 weeks in coma before his body completely crashed. It is exactly 1 year ago........it hurts, the emptiness is still there...............
#23
She was dating a really toxic guy and wouldn't listen to anyone who said to break it off, including me. We got in multiple fights about it until the guy said she wasn't allowed to talk to me anymore, that last fight was pretty ugly. So she called it quits with me. She's long since moved on to a better guy but I still miss her she was special to me.
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
I think a big red flag for her there was him "allowing" her to talk to people.
Sigrún Hlín 3 years ago
If you suspect someone is in an abusive relationship DO NOT criticise their partner. They will feel compelled to defend them. Do your best to keep a line if communication open and tell them that they can always come to you if they need help, day or night. They will remember that when they need you the most.
ERIKA H. 3 years ago
She was dealing with emotional abuse. Unfortunately, people in (emotionally) abusive relationships need to see it for themselves in order to get out of it and won't listen to friends or family (usually because they've been mad to believe by the abuser that everyone else is actually toxic). Sadly, i know this because i was once the person in these kinds of relationships
Tiger Pearl 3 years ago
I wonder if she was feeling ashamed of her behavior toward OP and that she allowed that to happen to herself.
PenguinQueen 1 year ago
I mean... People don't 'Allow themselves' to be manipulated and abused
Load More Replies... PenguinQueen 1 year ago
Now that she is healing, she probably now recognises and understands the abuse. I would reach out to her again with more compassion
#24
After 14 years of friendship we get an apartment and suddenly he loses his job as a personal trainer because of a dress code violation (he wore a hoodie to work, allegedly) and then 2-3 months of him not working. Then after he agreed to pay me back eventually, all he ever gave me was $400 from his mom (I paid over 14,000 for the year). So I paid the full year lease and he stayed 8 months total. I never talked to him again also because I found a receipt where he was trying to make a copy of my car keys make and model. F**K THAT GUY
ERIKA H. 3 years ago
A hoodie being a dress code violation for a personal trainer makes as much sense as a duck being afraid of water. That is like the uniform for anyone who works out! Sorry that happened. I had to cover rent for my friend/roommate of many years ago, but i made clear i had to be paid back within the month or they were getting kicked out
Amy Watson 3 years ago
Maybe it was a random hoodie instead of a company logo one? I've worked places that were ok with hoodies or tees or polos.....but they had to have the company logo on them. You couldn't just show up in your Metallica shirt.
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Appalachian Panda 3 years ago
He lost his job as a person trainer because he wore a hoodie to work? WTF
Amy 3 years ago (edited)
That's why he said he lost his job. I'd bet that's not what actually happened.
Load More Replies... SilverSkyCloud 2 years ago
im not a personal trainer nor do i know one but im calling BS on the "dress code violation" especialy with everything else op mentioned
#25
I came out to him
Pumpkin Spice 3 years ago
He was never a friend in the first place. Good on you for living as yourself.
Adele Maestranzi 3 years ago
I came out to my best friend in 1980, She dropped our friendship like a hot potato. Never heard from her ever again.
Misty-Dawn Amayi 3 years ago
You can only ever be your real self, so the only relationships worth keeping are the ones with the people who like and love the real you.
Midoribird Aoi 3 years ago
Sometimes I wonder if it isn't panic that they are saying that because they fear their best friend wants a romance with them next, versus genuine homophobia. Then they have lost their friend even after realizing that it was not the case, or were too proud to admit their mistake.
#26
My family was going through a hard time and had to move to an apartment suddenly. We had eight cats and they would only let us bring two. So my friend said she had really bonded with one of my cats and asked if she could take her. I really didn’t have many options for people who would take my cats on such short notice and was so heartbroken over this situation so I was absolutely delighted that she wanted to take the cat. Well a couple months into her having the cat I asked her how it was going and she told me the that the cat had started peeing on the furniture so they let her go outside. They hadn’t seen her since. I went and searched for the cat and couldn’t find her. After not speaking to her for weeks I decided to try to have a friendship with her again but it literally won’t work- I simply don’t like her anymore after that. Every time she would text me I would just roll my eyes and barely had the energy to respond. Then I finally just let it all out and blocked her on everything.
Felice Coles 3 years ago
Hope that "friend" never has kids either. What happens when they make messes? Do they get dumped outside too? You can always tell the type of person by how they treat animals.
MimSorensson 3 years ago
“Let out” and “dumping” aren’t even remotely close to be the same thing.
Load More Replies... #27
I heard him making fun of me to other kids in school. That one really cut deep.
Arizona 3 years ago
Good thing you left him. I’m so sorry about that. But to be honest, he’s where he deserves to be talking behind your back. He’s behind you.
#28
We idolized each other, but then she started to adopt aspects of my personality, how I dressed, what music I listened to, etc. Then she started throwing herself at anyone she knew that I found attractive so she could “get” them first. Then she tried to screw my brother. In my bed.
Midoribird Aoi 3 years ago (edited)
Someone getting a few clothes like yours, or a haircut like yours, is a compliment, to an extent. They admire your style. Beyond that is a serious problem!
Load More Replies... #29
Politics, unfortunately.
Tamra 3 years ago
Trump's presidency did one thing successfully: it divided the nation like I've never seen before.
Stannous Flouride 3 years ago
I don't think it was any less divided before the Biggest Loser came along. He just made his followers think it was okay to express their long-hidden racism, xenophobia, and general bigotry out loud.
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Mama Panda 3 years ago
I lost a lot of "friends" due to politics. I am registered Independent as my beliefs fall on both sides. For example, I am pro death penalty and I am pro choice. My ex friends didn't understand how I could be for and against some of the issues that we would discuss and if I didn't agree with them, I was called horrible names from people I have known since elementary school and unfriended. I know that not everyone shares my views and that is ok. There is absolutely no reason to be nasty about it and losing a friendship over it is just crazy!
Pg130 3 years ago
It is unfortunate that politics come between friends. People would do well to live and let live. Each person is entitled to their own beliefs. And if one person tries to force their beliefs on the other to the point it strains their relationship; was that person really a friend?
Richard Anderson 3 years ago
A friend of 15 years, 20 years a cousin and a brother. Never looked back.
LGBTQpanda 1 year ago (edited)
Basically 2016 confirmed who respected others and who blindly followed a guy who said he was smart because he "had money". A friendship lost hurts but we figured out who to trust.
That Person 1 year ago
Why do politics always have to divide people? I stay neutral for this reason.
Hoodoo 3 years ago (edited)
I've lived in the States some 40+ yrs. I saw this comin in the 80s. M' grandparents left the UK directly due to WW2 & m' parents spent long hrs playing hopscotch & jacks in the Underground/ UK bomb shelters. I remember them both commenting bout the Rush Limbaugh "Dittoheads" sounding like the Nazi Party. We all thought they had PTSD...poor things. That can't happen in the States... God was I naive. If you advocate for directly or indirectly harming others OR will stand by while they're harmed & marginalised, I've no use for you. I've learned that "friends" who ascribe to today's RW policies have character defects &/or emotional problems that prevent them from bein true friends. I'm civilized to them, but we won't be doing lunch anytime soon.
#30
He had a horrible birth defect where his brain formed in his d**k and he f****d my, at the time, girlfriend.
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
Such an unfortunate birth defect but I hope you've move on from them both and found a better friend/girlfriend.
Andy Frobig 3 years ago
God said to Adam, I have good news and bad news. The good news is, I'm giving you 2 great gifts. 1st, a wonderful brain that will help you master the world around you and create civilizations. 2nd, a sexual organ that will give you and Eve great pleasure and let you populate the Earth. Adam said, so what's the bad news? God said, I'm only giving you enough blood to use one at a time
Load More Replies... Leoninus Fate 3 years ago
well they say men have 2 brains, one in both "heads" so the birth defect was he didn't grow the top one really
#31
I was long term single & lonely. He was married, and suddenly all he could talk about was how much fun he was having by cheating on his wife.
After a while of getting more and more depressed by being around him, I had thoughts like:
-How can I claim to respect women if I’m hanging out with him?
-How can I claim to respect relationships and marriage if I’m hanging out with him?
-I’d honestly rather have nobody to hang out with than someone who only talks about cheating on his wife.
I ghosted him as much as is possible when you work at the same office. I’ve not seen any sign of him in ~15 years and I’ll be happy to never see him again.
#32
Upgraded our relationship, from best friends of 6 years to lovers. Realized I was gay and we broke up barely a year after. Lost my best friend and lover. I miss my friend.
#33
my mental health I went to him for support and he just put me down now I don't talk to anyone about my mental health like I should but I can't trust anyone cuse in the end they don't care or make you feel even more bad about it
Mirt 3 years ago
Because I had similar experiences when I first got diagnosed. I decided I wanted to be a mental health counselor because I can honestly tell my clients, "trust me, I understand what you are going through". Because I can relate and empathize, trust builds so much faster. There are good counselors out there. You may need to go through a few to find one you feel comfortable with but don't give up. That support is well worth it.
#34
Unfortunately, AIDS. Tony was always out to have fun, unencumbered by social norms or any hint of brevity, he was the life of the party and my best friend since we met in 8th grade. We went through *a lot* together. Lost him six years ago and will never forget his radiance or laugh.
#35
Just made a post about this but she uses me as a therapist but when I try to vent to her, she gives me a few cliche words of support before turning the conversation back to her. It's gotten to the point where we don't talk unless she has a bad day and needs someone to talk to. She'll take days or even a week to respond to a funny meme but then immediately start dumping on me about things going on on her life. I'll invite her out to have fun and within a few hours, I'm being her life coach.
Also, we just started to grow apart. She's turned into her parents and her parents are the typical snobby surban people that are extremely judgemental.
The Crushinator 3 years ago
Aaaaah yes! I had the exact same thing! I just felt like a puke bucket for this person and i didn't have the self esteem to do something about it, total codependent clusterfunk. Also she would constantly rant and rave about how all men are bad and how bad people are and boohoo she's the only righteous soul in existance! But when I confronted her with her own shortcomings or the way she treated me, it was all tears, emotional manipulation and self pity. I still feel bad for the way i ended it but boy, am I happier now ':)
Samara Messer 3 years ago (edited)
I went through this same thing. She would come to me to dump on me and to ask for favors but when I needed her for anything, she couldn't be bothered. She would exclude, me from plans saying she was too busy to remember to invite me but was never to busy to contact me when she needed a favor.. If I invited her to hang out, she would rarely give me an answer or would cancel last second when a better option came up. I cut her out of my life.
#36
He leaked personal files that were information about the people we take in (he was my coworker at a funeral home) and tried to blame it on me. Those files included autopsies, pictures of the actual body, legal information and so on. He would also not follow the requests given by family members (religious practices such as thoroughly cleaning the body before burial etc). Just a horrible person over all, and I truly believe that he leaked those things for personal fetishes because he had serious problems and we were suspecting him already.
#37
My depression...oh and one stole a credit card and blamed it on me. I got arrested. While I was in jail (over Christmas mind you), she f****d my boyfriend.
AxleMunshine001 3 years ago
Also the "boyfriend" has to share some of the blame
Load More Replies... #38
Being a compulsive liar for years, over stupid little things. Just got tired of it.
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
I had a similar experience with a friend. I was much happier when I ended that friendship.
#39
We planned a trip to another country, which she happened to have an online relationship with a guy who also lived there.
The moment we arrived off the plane and she found her bf, that was the last I saw of her until the end of the trip where we met at the airport. Very awkward experience, she also wanted him to join us in the hotel room, and was upset when I refused to allow him in. Once we got back home from the trip I never heard from her again.
Felice Coles 3 years ago
Well, she now has to find another dupe to get back to that country and mooch around with the guy.
#40
She was extremely manipulative. They were always in a bad mood and was very rude day by day. At the time I was at a low point in my life and was very vulnerable. They were the only person who talked to me and she knew, using this against me whenever I tried to call her out. One day I found out she was only friends with me to get a passing grade in classes and for me to always get stuff for her. Thankfully I have left behind that point and now have a supportive group of friends today but I am still hurt on how I was used.
#41
I annoyed her slightly for about 10 seconds one day so she ended up cyberbullying me severely over several platforms and several weeks. it was honestly for the best, she was toxic as f**k.
#42
A car accident, he went to his new job with a new car and never heard of him after that, got a letter from his parents that he will be buried soon, will never forget about him, he was such a good friend to me..
Edit: im doing better nowadays and i wish you the same recovery from your losses, i shared so many things with my bro and also knew he dreamed to become a good dad to a cute daugther, he wanted kids, he been making me crazy telling me that story over and over again, now it's just hunting me when i think about it but, maybe i can make him happy when i keep his wish in my heart idk, still hits me everday when this comes up.
we can just move on and take that with us
#43
He hated that I started dating my now fiancé, soon to be wife. Started calling me whipped, starting talking s**t behind my back (talking s**t about my girl) constantly. I found out he was like that pretty much throughout our entire friendship. Ended up causing a lot of problems when we were renting a property off of his mom, and that’s what ended the friendship for good. He was texting his mom telling her how much of a b***h my fiancé is, and his mom showed us the texts. Disrespect me all you want, but don’t disrespect my girl. He was obviously never a real friend but he was the only actual friend I had growing up. We were 21 when we stopped being friends. I don’t really have any friends now, and it sucks.
#44
He set up a fake messenger account and tried to catfish me into cheating on my wife. At first I had no idea who it was so I played along to get clues, he screenshot all of me playing along and conveniently left out me calling him out and sent them to my wife. Caused havoc in my marriage and almost led to a divorce. I literally have no clue why he did it, he was even my best man at my wedding and vice versa. He never actually fessed up to it and maintained it wasn’t him, even though I have good evidence it was. So, I blocked him on social media and deleted his number. Haven’t talked to him since.
#45
I was pretty much his only friend. He would come to me for attention but for whatever reason wasn’t able to make any interaction about me. It was always about him. On his terms. Me me me me. We lived together for a few years and it was mostly good. As soon as we moved into different places the convenience of our friendship died, and it was replaced by him only wanting to engage with me on his terms around things he wanted. I slowly grew exhausted by it and found myself investing in people who were able to give as well as receive.
Misty Moon 3 years ago
Still looking for those giving types. Glad to hear they are out there somewhere.
#46
Best friends since Jr high. We had a toxic past & hurt each other a lot while growing up. For about a decade, I wanted to get away from her. She resented anything good that happened to others, she would drag down anyone for trying to be positive. She was always the "I'm going to say whatever I want & I don't care what others think" type. She could dish insults and judgements all day but never could accept the slightest criticism. She would gather info to tell her friends' significant others just to start drama. It was always "life hates me" but she never did anything to improve her situation. She actively made it worse. We got into a fight one day & she was so mad that it was just the perfect opportunity to walk away.
Samara Messer 3 years ago
This sounds just like my mom except for the part about gathering info to start drama. Negative people like that drag you down.
#47
I was her agony aunt for 7 years while she navigated a train wreck of a relationship with an alcoholic (and secretly gay) boyfriend. She went and married him against the collective advice of family and friends. And I was her agony aunt once more through 3 years of marriage. There were never any fun times but what was I going to do? Abandon my friend? She eventually filed for divorce and right about that time, I was pregnant and ended up having a miscarriage. I couldn't really be there for her because I was going through mental hell plus physically I needed intense treatment to bounce back. So she pitches a hissy fit about how I am selfish and uncaring and badmouthed me to all our common friends. On top of that, she messaged my husband on Facebook and talked trash about me by bringing up my relationships before him and invited him for drinks with a promise to dish out more about me. That's when I slammed the door shut in her face. My only regret is that I took years to do it.
#48
Her allowing me to take my toddler into her known boyfriends drug house to use the bathroom; then broke into my house the following evening. And tried to beat me up while she was 6-7 months pregnant in a Walmart parking lot.
#49
Jealousy. We were super close for 20 years. And as we got older she compared absolutely everything we did. I wound up getting a great job and apartment and I watched it tear her apart. She even admitted to me that she had a hard time watching others do well. It was impossible for me to stick around. Constant micro aggressions. I tried my hardest to stay friends because we had been through so much together. But I finally realized it wasn’t fair to me to constantly, I mean constantly be secretive about my achievements or be on the receiving end of utter disdain. One day I stopped taking her calls and never looked back
Samara Messer 3 years ago
I've come across a few people like this in my life at one time or another. Some may actually want others do well as long as long as the achievements don't surpass theirs.
#50
They told me that they never really cared about my hobbies, interests, passions, etc, and actually feigned interest for at least half of our 'friendship' (give or take two years) You know how people cheat because they're bored of the person yet still want the emotional support of their partner? It was kinda like that. They still hypocritically spoke to me about their interests during this time, and I would still try to console them whenever they were going through something. The sheer hypocrisy of it finally woke me up to just how one sided our 'friendship' actually was, so I told them outright that I'm no longer speaking to them
#51
She found me a place to stay for free with one of her friends during my divorce. I was insanely depressed and I was a horrible roommate. She found me a great opportunity to restart my life, and I just pissed all of her friends off. I don’t blame her. I was a total wreck during those months. Just miss that friend I had for 20 years.
Kurtis Cobainus 3 years ago
That's what people never get. When people are acting weird, it's probably because they have some kind of issue, help them with that.
#52
I grew up and she didn't.
I was ready to move forward in my life, I had a good long-term relationship and was looking forward to getting married, starting a family, and all that but she was a single mom who just wanted to party all the time. I know people look at it and say I got old and she knows how to have a good time but being the way she is, it takes a toll on your physical and mental health after a while. She hasn't been in a good place for years.
Weirdest Bi You’ll Ever Meet 3 years ago
Reminds me of my sister but she is 21 and I’m 13. I’m way more grow Im way more grow up that her.
Felice Coles 3 years ago
Desperation to fill up the empty with "good times," even when they're not good.
#53
College roommates (shared a room for 2 years). Best friends. Turned out she was a raging klepto & pathological liar - stole everything from my car to my underwear and was a known thief around campus. Also was telling people lies about me to keep me isolated and basically make her the "one who was always there for me." confronted her with evidence and she never owned up to it, was stuck in a lease for a few more months and kept it civil then cut contact once i moved out. was really sad we were best friends or at least i thought we were.....
#54
He was secretly recording women he had sex with from tinder. He would also record his massage therapy clients. I called him out for it several times and still continued.
#55
Since the first times hanging I felt like she would make me look dumb when I was uninformed on a topic, being arrogant and even though I loved her so much as my best friend and years of friendship, deep down I always had trust issues with her because of her constant belittling me
#56
It started to become a very one sided friendship where I was always being asked for favors but never getting anything in return. Also lost several friends when I cut down heavily on smoking weed.
Misty Moon 3 years ago
Lost a good 90% of my "friends" when I quit drinking. I tried to hang out with them but soon realized I couldn't stand a lot of them while I was sober but mostly I ended up walking away because of the pressure to drink with them or the amount of c**p they gave me for not drinking was just not worth their company.
Paul Brown 1 year ago
When I stopped drinking it was then that I realized I had nothing in common with my so called"friends" except drinking. I never heard from any of them when I quit.
Load More Replies... #57
She decided her 2 month long relationship with her boyfriend was too good for our 5 year long friendship. And we were very close as friends. I had to find out from her that she ended the friendship as she casually blocked me in every possible way. When I asked her why, she said I talk to her too much. What kind of best friend says that? Edit: they also broke up after 4 months of dating
#58
I was in a relationship with someone who my best friend assumed was a bad guy, but in reality he wasn't. She tried to get me to hookup with someone else while I was with this man and I refused. She ended up outing my relationship to my mother and spread rumors about us. When I confronted her about it, she played dumb. I felt so betrayed I just never spoke to her again and now that guy and I are getting married and have a baby.
#59
I realized that I was doing all of the phone calls and texts and he never initiated anything.
#60
We had a relationship and I couldn't just stop having feelings
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
This one is kinda sad. Too many friendships end when feelings develop or happen.
Kurtis Cobainus 3 years ago
I know. People should honestly just either accept them, and move on, or tell them to find someone else
Load More Replies...
Lisa H 3 years ago
Lost a couple of friends that way. Also lost more friends when I realized they were only hanging out with me because of the possibility of hooking up with me and ghosted me when it didn't happen. I lost a lot of friends that way. I keep wondering what's wrong with me since it's happened so much.
#61
Her boyfriend and me blowing up. So first off: me and her hang out almost every single day and weekend for years. We were inseparable like twins before. Even after she switched to a better highschool, nothing changed much. She had a bit less time as she studied hard. After a year or so I met my boyfriend. After a couple of months the relationship went downhill. Lots of fights, he abused me, r*pe, threatened if I wanted to leave, cheated etc... needless to say I was extremely depressed. During this time she met her boyfriend too. And he was always around. It was impossible to do something with her alone. And I needed her, though I never told her what is really happening in my relationship. I was too ashamed. One day we wanted to meet (after 3 months!!!!) but then she didn't and said her boyfriend doesn't like this bar... I asked her then if he really needed to come and if I cannot have my best friend for myself for just 1 hour after 3 months of not even seeing her. Arguing and discussing led to a massive fight. It ended with her saying I don't accept her boyfriend and he anyway told her I was a bad influence because of my lack of perspective (as said I was depressed)... so she ended the friendship. It broke my heart and I cried for months. Lorena if you read this and if you are on reddit: I am so so sorry... I still love you and miss you! Also: I wish people would talk more about friendship break-ups. It's worse than a relationship break-up.
Misty Moon 3 years ago
Why are you apologizing? Asking for an hour with a friend isn't something to apologize for and being depressed doesn't require an apology either. She should be the one apologizing to you!
#62
Junior year of high school I started dating a black guy (no one she knew). She told me to choose. She lost. Relationship didn't last forever but I got my amazing firstborn out of it.
#63
Talked to an ex-friend of both of us, didn't like it and made me choose. A little manipulative tho, always made everyone feel less than her. So I decided to cut those things out of my life. Got cut out of the friend group, and into depression because of it. But well, here we are.
Felice Coles 3 years ago
It's not depressing to get rid of excess baggage! It's an opportunity to grow better elsewhere.
#64
She forgot to request off work the day I got married.
#65
He turned out to be a pretty manipulative, abusive narcissist, that sapped my energy, strength, and was overall a terrible person. No one has treated me worse than that, it was an incredibly dark wake up call to the kinds of people out there.
#66
Took an international vacation where we realized we hated damn near everything each other did the whole time. Realized year of seeing each other 1-2 times a month made us hardly know each other.
#67
When I realized he was a bully. I just wanted his friendship and attention, and then I realized he was using me for kicks. I put up with his b******t because I wanted to be liked.
#68
Heroin addiction followed by death by overdose.
#69
One of my ex-best friends has BPD. We’d been friends since we were 8 (I’m 32). I’m in the process of filing for divorce, been separated for over a year, have a wonderful new SO, kids, school, had a job for awhile (in-between now)… apparently, when I separated from my husband I was supposed to have more time for her. She lives 2 hours away. She started calling me and being passive aggressive about how I haven’t called her, she’d been sad, etc. At the time I was a pizza delivery driver working 3-10 and sometimes until 1 am. One night she called me late, drunk as hell, and I was exhausted and probably a little too honest about my feelings regarding her leaving her a*****e boyfriend for the thousandth time in 4 years. I told her if she was really done she wouldn’t be sending him texts saying things like “I’ve always loved you, I’m going to miss you.” Woke up the next day I was blocked on everything. She told another friend of mine that since I got separated “everything is about *my name*” Haven’t heard from her since, it’s been 3 months. I’m fine with it.
#70
I lived in a building for disabled and seniors. A lady on the first floor would cry out at the top of her lungs every few minutes. We were near that apt waiting for the elevator, and he couldn't stop laughing at her. We now keep in touch via FB, but that was really the end. Cruelty is a line I don't cross.
DC 3 years ago
... it's one thing if you can't help but laugh in an unexpected situation, like a guy with tourette's on the bus said (to the driver, about a woman on a bicycle in front of us, slowing us down a bit, but next stop in sight already, so no big deal, ...) "Fahren Sie sie platt! Tut mir aber leid..." - translates to "Run her over - oh, I am SOOOO sorry!", with the sorrybeing part being kinda cynical, ironical, ... I couldn't hold it back, although I wanted, and sparked some other people to laugh. Then dead silence, guy with tourette's sees the reason of the laughter was his comment ... dead silence, next stop, he left in a hurry. Wish I'd said I was sorry, really didn't want to laugh by such a reason, but it struck me pretty unprepared and sounded so incredibly hilarious. What she cried out for? Did anyone get her help of some kind?
#71
she tried setting up her gay friend with our mutual gay friend, and the mutual friend wasn't interested. She couldn't get the hint, so I told her to cut it out. still didn't get it and kept trying. called her rude and a sh**ty friend and then she "dumped" me. the mutual friend, the ex best friend and I haven't talked in over 6 years. oh well, it was all toxic anyway
#72
Never lend money to a friend, especially if you can't afford to.
#73
Her dad died unexpectedly and I was there for her. My dad died unexpectedly a year later and she was not (maybe couldn’t be) there for me. It happens, life is weird.
#74
Jail... He went to jail for a really dumb reason and wont return letters. Idk if it's embarrassment or what but he doesn't seem to want to be contacted.
#75
We were friends since primary school and in primary she had a very typical child-like personality, as you'd expect a child to have of course. The thing is, as we got older, she never lost this personality. She still behaved like a child in the sense that she was over the top positive about every little thing that happened. I don't think that's a bad thing; she saw the world through rose coloured glasses and added her own glitter to it.There are reasons for her being like that - dysfunctional family life, abusive father, she was the middle child who felt as though she had to keep the peace amongst everyone so she developed this personality to compensate for the negativity of her home life. But for me, I didn't feel like she and I were compatible anymore as friends as I often felt like I had to match her energy when I was around her. This slowly got more and more difficult, especially in my late teens as I went through a severe period of depression, so being her friend overall was exhausting. Eventually we just faded out of each others lives. She's the one friend I feel guilty about drifting apart from because unlike my other friends, she did absolutely nothing wrong. She's someone who's truly wholesome in spite of everything she grew up with. We're in our twenties now. Our mums are still close. Last I heard she's met a wonderful guy whom she's living with. She doesn't want to get married (and I don't blame her) but he treats her right, which is all that matters, and I couldn't be happier for her.
#76
She became a habitual cheater. She was married to a great guy who worked hard and I honestly thought they had a great marriage. We met for lunch one day and she tells me that she doesn’t love her husband and that she never has. She realized that she didn’t love him because she truly loved her affair partner. I was shocked and even hurt that things had gone so far without her telling me. I told her I would support her during the divorce and offered to let her stay with me. She explained that she wasn’t going to tell her husband and wanted to wait until they were more financially stable to divorce him. I was honestly disgusted that she would continue to sleep with her husband while having an affair. She called me judgey and told me that I should just support her and love her and let her lead her own life. After a while more information came out. She had originally cheated on her husband with a colleague on a work trip. She said she was just drunk and it was a mistake. The man she said she was in love with is a different colleague who also happens to be married. She has always been a good friend me but watching her treat her husband so poorly was awful, and she seemed to have no shame. She would lie to travel to meet her AP, even having her mother in law babysit her two kids. I got urgent calls from her asking me to take down social media posts because she had told her husband she was with me. I just hated knowing about it, and she made me feel bad for not being willing to meet him. We took a girls trip to Vegas and she ended up leaving us to go sleep with two random men we met there. This behavior was so out of the norm for our friend group, and she was the only one that was married and supposedly in love with her AP. Eventually the affair ended, with her husband never finding out. She finally told him she was unhappy, and he did everything anyone should want a spouse to do. He offered to change jobs, work less (she didn’t want to have to deal with less money), wanted to go to counseling, basically told her she was the love of his life and he would do anything to make her happy. She hated this and criticized every attempt he made to heal their marriage. She just seemed to hate him for no reason. She started talking more about a couple that she works with. I was suspicious that she had a crush on the husband but I knew she was friends with the wife too. She got really sick one day and the wife went and picked up her kids and watched them while she recovered. I called one day and her coworker was at her house baking cookies with her boys, I asked where her husband was and she said he was doing Yardwork. I thought it was weird that a married man would be baking cookies with a married coworker, but just assumed surely she wouldn’t be so blatant. I had gotten really concerned about her mental health and her erratic behavior but things seemed better. We had dinner and I told her I thought she was glamorizing divorce and that actually dating is hard and gets messy. She assured me that she had both eyes open and honestly made me feel like I was getting my old friend back. After the dinner I was telling a mutual friend how I thought she was doing better and this friend spilt the beans. She was sleeping with her coworker. Apparently this affair had started months before around the time the wife gave birth to their first baby. So the woman who was such a good friend that while pregnant took care of her children while she was too sick to, that’s who’s husband she decided to sleep with. Apparently she knew I wouldn’t take this well, so she decided not to tell me. Instead she would specifically tell me great things about this guy and horrible things about his wife, so that when they ended up together I’d approve. I was just done. We never even talked about it. She’s reached out several times but I have no desire to have her in my life
Misty Moon 3 years ago
Wow. It's ok to let someone live their life but it doesn't mean you have to approve or stick around for the train wreck. I just love how the person with a conscience/morals always gets deemed the jerk when they don't approve of cheating, lying and being the alibi for someone who obviously has no care for anyone but themselves. Smh.
#77
Valued working all the time and making money over staying in touch. Final straw was ghosting(didn’t answer texts or calls) me and another friend for a dinner we had planned weeks earlier. The other friend was visiting from out of town too. We ended up having a great time without them anyway.
#78
He said something disgusting to a girl on reddit and I wasn’t comfortable being his friend after that.
#79
Sometimes you aren't your best friend's best friend. This isn't my best friend but what I thought was a great friend: Somewhere in 2020 he started a very successful company. I invited him to my wedding and asked him to be my witness. He told me he had something that weekend. I assumed his startup took a lot from him so I said no big deal. A couple months later I told him I might change job in the upcoming months. He told me he had a job for me at his company and basically convinced me to meet his team for an interview. I didn't hear from them for months. Since he was out of the interview process I asked whats up to one of the employee and the reply was that he (my friend at the time) was supposed to call me back
#80
I slept with one of her friends from her work and she basically stopped talking to me. At the time I didn’t see what the issue was back then but now, six or seven years on, I think she may have had feelings for me and my stupid a*s didn’t pick up on it. Idk.
#81
I’m in bed listening to my 16yo cry in the next room. She and her best friend since preschool have grown apart and they finally had the “friend breakup” talk tonight. They’ve really just pursued different sports which has led to different groups of friends and little spare time (her BFF is truly gifted in her sport and is a two-time individual state champ going into her junior year - the kid trains 6 days a week, year-round, with tons of travel). Nothing really dramatic happened between them, but my girl is bereft :( I’ve sent the dog in to comfort her.
#82
I (18F) confessed how I was feeling about him (18M). I didn’t have any prior experience in relationships and so my words weren’t clear enough for him to understand that I like him. He asked what I wanted to do about us and I thought it was a rejection done in a subtle way, so I just sent my goodbye letter and thanks. It’s been half a year since we last talked.
#83
She told me I was a pussy if I didn't lose my virginity on a vacation trip to see my boyfriend. Both our parents would be there too, and I didn't want to personally. Her boyfriend agreed with her and they laughed about it. This also ruined my friendship with our mutual friend because he invited me over to hang out with them both, I declined, and he told me I was being dramatic. 8 years of friendship down the drain.
#84
Best friends since second grade. He peaked in high school and I did after. Got his heart broken by the girl he was dating in high school and it must have impacted him significantly as he was smoking weed a lot. I got married he was my best man. In the middle of my reception he left saying he was sick. We hung out once after that with my wife, him still being single. Would ask for advice once and a while (tables turned). He became a cop shortly after. Rarely talked. I'd text him long paragraphs telling him about our distance as we only seen each other once or twice in the past 4-5 years. I had my first kid he still hasn't made an effort to see her. Unless he reaches out to me for something I would no longer reach out. I also realized his political stance changed as well since being a cop. He supported Trump and I didn't. Breaks me every time I think of him and what I could have possibly done wrong. Not sure if it's because he was always ahead of me in life and I've settled down, financially stable, etc that intimidates him but I'm done. Every year I'd wish him happy birthday, every year he forgets mine. He's always busy "working" but he lives 5 minutes walking distance. It's unforgivable in my opinion. Wish him the best of luck but the best friend he had won't be there for him anymore.
#85
Toxic. Constantly negative. Constantly telling me how much more successful they are than me (they are, but I'm doing very well), demanding I play specific games with them. Known 'em for around 25 years. Decided the stress/harassment was no longer worth it. Hurts every day. I want to tell my bud about things going on, laugh at people with him, etc. But it's better this way.
#86
He got a girlfriend, and she didn't want him having friends.
Ines Olabarria-Smith 3 years ago
I couldn’t be with my husband if he or me didn’t have friends or other interests. I love him dearly but we both need our space.
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
This goes both ways and its always so common in too many relationships.
#87
He was an aspiring comedian(less than a week in) and wanted to get some feedback on his jokes. I didn’t laugh or blow smoke up his a*s on said jokes. He cursed me out, hung up on me and we haven’t spoke since. This happened 5 years ago.
#90
Keep putting off texting him back. Ah, s**t — it’s 10:00. So late. What if he wants to talk? I’ll just do it tomorrow. It’s been 10 years now.
Kurtis Cobainus 3 years ago
NEVER do that. That little "I'll just do it tomorrow" may never come.
#91
He got into ju jitsu ended up with a micro bleed on his brain and it entirely changed his personality my best friend of over fifteen years was no longer the same person.
#92
I was dating mine. When we originally started, I remember saying that regardless if we didnt stay as romantic partners, I wanted to preserve our friendship because she was so dear to me. We spent 2 years together, but I felt like we had grown distant and that neither of us had the time/effort for a relationship. So I tried to step away and go back to being friends. She didnt comprehend that at all. She immediately just, read everything I said/texted as the ABSOLUTE opposite. Cut me out of all our mutual friend groups and from mutual friends. Burnt the f*****g bridge. I was devastated. I tried so hard to be absolutely clear that I just wanted some space, I just wanted to be friends again for a bit. But no. It was either girlfriends or nothing. So I got nothing. I'm f*****g broken. She was my best friend and I truly did care and love her. But now she's hurt me so badly by being passive aggressive and petty, doing things that she KNOWS would hurt me and they do. I hate everything. I didnt want this. I feel so empty and lost without her, we were friends for TEN YEARS. She was one of the few constants I had in my sh**ty young-adulthood. It's been three months now. I dont know if I'll ever recover. It seems like she's replaced me already and all I can do is sit here, in silence and suffer alone.
#93
His ego got way too much for me to put up with. Plus I knew I wasn't going to forgive him for the damage he did to my place unless he paid me back or help fix the stuff. He almost went out of his way to do so little or be a more of pain than his worth.
#94
He didn’t grow up. He was a d**k to me and my other friends. Whenever I was playing with another friend he would get jealous then join our GTA session and grief us. Or when I told him off(yes he deserved it) he would play dumb and act like he did nothing wrong and I was the bad guy. So basically he had his head in his a*s 24/7 and couldn’t realize that the reason he had no friends and they distanced themselves from him was because of his doing. He litteraly has no friends me and my other 2 friends were his last friends and he f****d it all up. Quite sad honestly.
#95
I’m a leap year baby, I try to make a big deal of my bday since it only comes every four years. My 24th, I booked a beach house to spend it with my family, my other best friend and her. Told her two months in advanced. Paid for everything and family took care of the food, so all she had to do was show up. The day comes and she said she couldn’t come cause she couldn’t get off work early enough (we were there on a Thursday-Sunday) so I thought she’d at least make an effort to come on the weekends. She never came. Then a week later, she tweets that she’s compulsively took time off work to watch F1. Felt like she couldn’t even make time for me but can make time to watch cars racing.
#97
You know, I still don't know. We were super close for about seven years, maybe? Since my first year in college. Then she just didn't want to be friends with me anymore. Clearly, she felt something was amiss between us because our mutual friends also gave me the cold shoulder after that. Honestly, it actually wasn't as devastating as it sounds. I think she would have told me if I legit did something bad so probably something else was going on. She came out as a lesbian and got a girlfriend right before this, and I think that had a lot to do with it. Maybe the girlfriend didn't like her GF having such a close woman friend? The weird thing was I did not find it devastating and I never thought I would be that kind of person. But, as soon as those other people sort of turned on me, I was out of there with that group. I felt it was good riddance to bad rubbish if that's what they were like. Maybe I would have been distraught if we were all still in college. However, we were way past that time, plus that type of politicking seemed childish.
#98
She slept with a married guy. I said i thought that was immoral of both of them. We ended up arguing whether that is legitimately polyamory (afaik the wife never knew). I dont know how they ended up now, and to be honest, im a bit curious too
Misty Moon 3 years ago
It doesn't matter if they are polly or not. If the spouse or s/o doesn't know they are sleeping with someone else, that's called cheating.
#99
Didn’t want to date him
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
As in you all were friends and then he expressed the desire to be in a relationship?
#100
I’ve meet this friend on our first day at school ( age 3/4 ) but when I we where 16, I was expelled from our catholic school for a beef with a priest, and was at the begging of the social media era, so he never send me any messages and in my shame I never tried to keep in touch. Despite felling that I was forgotten and became a ghost in memory, I don’t blame him. Wherever we meet in any occasion or something, I feel the loneliness and sadness gnawing my heart of losing the first friend I’ve ever had and I wonder if he ever felt sad or was so easy to move on
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idrow1 3 years ago
My best friend turned into a momby and I tried to be understanding. We had mass layoffs at work and people all around me were packing up their cubes. A guy who was on my team and was the sole provider for a family of 5 who was next to my cube was packing his stuff and you could tell he was holding back tears. Friend calls me, I tell her it's like a death march here and it's surreal and we're all stunned and devastated. She says, "Yeah, I'm having a hard day, too. [kid] dropped her light brites on the floor." That she even compared the two told me she was no longer the same person I once knew. I was disgusted and done.
Sooploosh MacSchnibble 3 years ago
My best friend passed away when he swallowed an unknown object that blocked his intestines. We took him to the vet, but they said as long as he was walking, and drinking water, he'd make it. However, when my aunt, brother, and uncle were at a baseball game (my little brother plays baseball), and I was keeping charlie company, he stopped drinking, and ended up laying down in my room for almost an hour before my aunt came home and rushed him to the vet. He died on the way there.
Leo Domitrix 3 years ago
Diagnosis with epilepsy showed me who was a friend and who wasn't. Turns out, there are good friends in my life. And some I don't miss a da*n bit. (One called my epilepsy "baggage she didn't want to carry". Oy.)
LittlePiggie 3 years ago
She called and yelled at me angrily for not inviting her to the surprise engagement dinner my now husband and my two brothers set up, that I knew NOTHING about. She'd done some horribly selfish things (like in college calling me a self a-hole for not asking her how she was when MY mom died), and I don't know why I didn't end the friendship earlier. Was like a breath of fresh air letting her go.
An Unpopular Opinion. 3 years ago
I had the best best friend!! She was the nicest, and while we shared different world views/ religions, we never talked about it in a bad way. She was depressed, and I would listen to her vent and offer advice and my love, and I struggle with anxiety and she's so the same for me. And we had plenty of fun conversations too. Anyway a little more than a year ago her parents found out she was talking to strangers online (we'd been friends for over a year. We knew what each other looked like. We weren't strangers anymore lol)and they made her stop. I still think about her a lot and pray she's still alive. She lives alllll the way across the world...
Jack Holt 3 years ago
Had a bf who had pretty unfortunate circumstances. Advocated for her for years, supplied her with cash, food and holidays. She met this bloke who was abusive then she turned on me for telling it like it is, even though the guy way breaking her door down of a night and the police were involved. Cared for her despite my own relationship and study commitments, but once I needed a listening ear it was all turned back onto to and I was spurned as being needy. After years of being there for her. Friendship clearly only went one way, as painful as it was I could not continue it.
Aunt Riarch 3 years ago
You are a thoroughly decent person, I hope you find the friends you deserve
Load More Replies...
Wysteria_Rose 3 years ago
One friend in college (he wasn't much of a good person and neither was I when we were together, so I can't say "best" friend) actually broke our relationship off due to my relationship with my current husband/then boyfriend. My husband is older, had come out of a bad marriage, and this friend of mine flat out says "I don't want to hear you talk about him. I have no respect for someone who would date a married man like my dad did when he cheated on my mom." 1.) He wasn't married when we began dating. (2.) I found the comparison a bit stretched since this guy's dad was an alcoholic who beat his mother as well as cheated on her multiple times. (3.) It was a bit of a shock at how much he couldn't stand us after I stood up for him more than once (he's gay and we live in a very conservative state). Now, eight years married with two amazing stepsons and hoping for another, my life is just fine without him.
FABULOUS1 3 years ago
One of my best friends passed away in her sleep 15 years ago, the best person ever and her death has been a great loss. My ex sister in law was also my best friend but we were more like sisters. We had always remained very close even after her and my brother broke it off. We have known each other for about 25 years and she suddenly started making comments often about me being gay. Then she started with covid is a hoax stuff, and extreme religious beliefs. There was other things that happened but not enough room to explain. We did make up for a brief moment but I realized it will never be the same. Which still makes me very sad, I honestly didnt think something could break our bond especially religion, politics and a damn pandemic.
Ellie 3 years ago
During high school I was in a really dark spot and suffering in school due to my OCD being really bad at the time. She told me that it was because I wasn't praying and reading my Bible enough. And that my OCD and anxiety was no worse than other teens and I was being dramatic and stereotypical. I shouldn't make such a big deal out of it because others had it worse than I did. I'm so glad I cut her off because she was so negative. F_ck you Samantha
idrow1 3 years ago
My best friend turned into a momby and I tried to be understanding. We had mass layoffs at work and people all around me were packing up their cubes. A guy who was on my team and was the sole provider for a family of 5 who was next to my cube was packing his stuff and you could tell he was holding back tears. Friend calls me, I tell her it's like a death march here and it's surreal and we're all stunned and devastated. She says, "Yeah, I'm having a hard day, too. [kid] dropped her light brites on the floor." That she even compared the two told me she was no longer the same person I once knew. I was disgusted and done.
Sooploosh MacSchnibble 3 years ago
My best friend passed away when he swallowed an unknown object that blocked his intestines. We took him to the vet, but they said as long as he was walking, and drinking water, he'd make it. However, when my aunt, brother, and uncle were at a baseball game (my little brother plays baseball), and I was keeping charlie company, he stopped drinking, and ended up laying down in my room for almost an hour before my aunt came home and rushed him to the vet. He died on the way there.
Leo Domitrix 3 years ago
Diagnosis with epilepsy showed me who was a friend and who wasn't. Turns out, there are good friends in my life. And some I don't miss a da*n bit. (One called my epilepsy "baggage she didn't want to carry". Oy.)
LittlePiggie 3 years ago
She called and yelled at me angrily for not inviting her to the surprise engagement dinner my now husband and my two brothers set up, that I knew NOTHING about. She'd done some horribly selfish things (like in college calling me a self a-hole for not asking her how she was when MY mom died), and I don't know why I didn't end the friendship earlier. Was like a breath of fresh air letting her go.
An Unpopular Opinion. 3 years ago
I had the best best friend!! She was the nicest, and while we shared different world views/ religions, we never talked about it in a bad way. She was depressed, and I would listen to her vent and offer advice and my love, and I struggle with anxiety and she's so the same for me. And we had plenty of fun conversations too. Anyway a little more than a year ago her parents found out she was talking to strangers online (we'd been friends for over a year. We knew what each other looked like. We weren't strangers anymore lol)and they made her stop. I still think about her a lot and pray she's still alive. She lives alllll the way across the world...
Jack Holt 3 years ago
Had a bf who had pretty unfortunate circumstances. Advocated for her for years, supplied her with cash, food and holidays. She met this bloke who was abusive then she turned on me for telling it like it is, even though the guy way breaking her door down of a night and the police were involved. Cared for her despite my own relationship and study commitments, but once I needed a listening ear it was all turned back onto to and I was spurned as being needy. After years of being there for her. Friendship clearly only went one way, as painful as it was I could not continue it.
Aunt Riarch 3 years ago
You are a thoroughly decent person, I hope you find the friends you deserve
Load More Replies... Wysteria_Rose 3 years ago
One friend in college (he wasn't much of a good person and neither was I when we were together, so I can't say "best" friend) actually broke our relationship off due to my relationship with my current husband/then boyfriend. My husband is older, had come out of a bad marriage, and this friend of mine flat out says "I don't want to hear you talk about him. I have no respect for someone who would date a married man like my dad did when he cheated on my mom." 1.) He wasn't married when we began dating. (2.) I found the comparison a bit stretched since this guy's dad was an alcoholic who beat his mother as well as cheated on her multiple times. (3.) It was a bit of a shock at how much he couldn't stand us after I stood up for him more than once (he's gay and we live in a very conservative state). Now, eight years married with two amazing stepsons and hoping for another, my life is just fine without him.
FABULOUS1 3 years ago
One of my best friends passed away in her sleep 15 years ago, the best person ever and her death has been a great loss. My ex sister in law was also my best friend but we were more like sisters. We had always remained very close even after her and my brother broke it off. We have known each other for about 25 years and she suddenly started making comments often about me being gay. Then she started with covid is a hoax stuff, and extreme religious beliefs. There was other things that happened but not enough room to explain. We did make up for a brief moment but I realized it will never be the same. Which still makes me very sad, I honestly didnt think something could break our bond especially religion, politics and a damn pandemic.
Ellie 3 years ago
During high school I was in a really dark spot and suffering in school due to my OCD being really bad at the time. She told me that it was because I wasn't praying and reading my Bible enough. And that my OCD and anxiety was no worse than other teens and I was being dramatic and stereotypical. I shouldn't make such a big deal out of it because others had it worse than I did. I'm so glad I cut her off because she was so negative. F_ck you Samantha
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