“The Look My Wife Gave Me”: 35 People Share Their Weird Habits That They Didn’t Think Were Weird Until Their Spouses Said So
As kids, we were naturally curious — and extremely impressionable. We absorbed the world like little sponges by observing and mimicking everything our parents did. Unconsciously, most of us also picked up some quirky behaviors along the way that turned out to be... a bit weird.
Believe it or not, we may even glide through life completely unaware of these silly rituals, but hey, it's just a thing we do. Only as we grow older and start to create meaningful relationships with people around us, sharing our childhood memories — which we believed were perfectly and totally normal — inevitably leads to confused looks and a few raised eyebrows.
So without further ado, let's dig into this viral thread from humor writer and editor Kristen Mulrooney that took us on a hilarious rollercoaster where this phenomenon was laid out on the table. Turns out, thousands of friends and spouses privy to their loved ones' presumed ordinary behaviors gathered the courage to tell them that, in fact, they’re anything but. We at Bored Panda have gathered some of the most entertaining responses to share with you all, so continue scrolling! Be sure to upvote your favorite tales, and share your own experiences with us in the comments.
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Apparently, Kristen’s tweet was inspired by two recent conversations she had with her husband: "When I was in elementary school, one of the best parts of the day was when the whole class walked across the school together for a big group bathroom trip," she said in an interview with BuzzFeed. "And he was like, '...that's not as normal as it sounds like you think it is.'"
"Then later that day, something came up about school dances, and my husband said, 'I'm not sure if this is normal for public schools, but we always had a random priest show up to chaperone our middle school dances.' I was like, 'I am very sure that is NOT normal.'"
The responses to Kristen's tweet were filled with similar tales where people gladly exposed their spouses’ quirky behaviors, from peculiar eating habits to outright odd phrases like "don’t forget to chirp the car" — which is a totally normal thing clearly everyone says.
I hated it. It was so much worse when I couldn't get my parents to believe that I'd hurt my tailbone. It took about 2 years for mom to give in and let me see a doctor about it. She didn't realize how difficult it is for that area to heal and I didn't have any visible breakage or bruising. I. Hate. Spankings. One of the biggest 'little' issues in romantic relationships. Stopped my siblings from doing the birthday spankings. The kids hated it too. So, hubby and I are at the party and the birthday boy is trying to convince his parents no spanking. I offhandedly said 'Eh, Uncle can take your spanking for you.' The adults instantly got uncomfortable and no kid was birthday spanked again.
I know of them but do not remember (and hope I am not repressing anything!) ever having them on any childhood birthdays. What a bizarre (AKA: wrong and inappropriate) concept!
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REALLY depends on who's doing the spanking, and the spirit in which it's intended.
Birthday Bumps. Someone took you under the arms and another person under the knees and they would bounce your butt on the ground once for every year. Sometimes an extra one for good luck.
In my country they grabbed you by ankles and wrists, swinged you sideways and bumped you against a volunteer who got on his knees and elbows, as many times as the years you turned. It was only ever done in school class as a “thank you” after you distributed candy to every classmate.
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Yeah, but it wasn't like actual spanking, it was just extremely lightly patting on the butt.
Ha! I wish. Usually each of the siblings would get a turn in the year count whack. How do you think that went?
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That's creepy. My parents did it, but they never would have let someone outside of our family participate, that's not normal.
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I'm so sorry you had to grow up in that environment.
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We got our ear pulled by my Grandpa for the number of years old we were.
My mom and dad did "birthday spankings" too, but they were totally fine and nothing like real spankings! Also they stopped once we got older. They would lay us across there lap and *pretend* to spank as hard as they could but just hit their other hand creating a loud clap...one for each year and a pinch to grow an inch haha
Also it was definitely in good fun, lots of laughing and screeching from the toddlers ensues
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The teachers used to line kids up in school, and send you through the "tunnel" between kids' legs to get spanks when I was young! If I ever did that as a teacher, I would have been brought up on charges! I hated it.
In school we did a spanking machine where we got Ii a line and the bday kid crawled through our legs as we spanked them. Also added a pinch to grow an inch.
The spanking machine when I was growing up in the 70's was a big thing!! All the kids at your party lined up and you walked through a human tunnel getting walloped by all of them.
Yep!! We did this at recess!! No idea why but we thought it was the funniest game ever as kids!
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It's not a real "spanking" it's just a light pat on the butt, it's just meant to be silly, like when you complain something hurts and you dad goes "guess we gotta cut it off then"
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I remember kids punching arms, one punch for each year. Could never understand why.
My family did it, until my mom's second husband began abusing me. Nobody thought it was funny anymore.
My grandparents did this, everyone else I knew just did a clap for each year and one to make you grow, after you blew the candles out.
We did! More like joking around spanks, nothing painful, and it stopped around 6 yrs old.
It was always the tradition in our house. I thought everyone did it too.
We did and that wasn't the only time. Any excuse to smack us (usually me as I was the oldest) they took full opportunity and then some
https://www.ranker.com/list/birthday-tradition-history/melissa-sartore
just got 54 2 weeks ago. This is where it sucks to be the oldest in the house
Everyone did this when I was growing up, we weren't spanked but hit hard on the back. We called it the birthday 'bumps' one for each year and one for good luck. Dad would announce it was time and everyone would chase you, pin you down and dad would give you your bumps. I hated it.. I'm Scottish buy I'm pretty sure it was common all over the UK.
I remember it being a thing that happened, but more than maybe once i don't think it happened to me specifically.
Someone did it to me once. I was very small and spent much of my childhood in hospitals because of a congenital neurological disorder. I was nonetheless...let's call it precocious. I told them if they ever hit me again I would hit back. The look of shock was gratifying. They said it was just for fun and I said, not if I don't think so.
Yep my family does it but it's a pinch to grow on, as me and my siblings are growing older we don't do it much anymore but I still try to enforce it :P
That was a common thing when I was a kid in the 60's, only it was one for each year plus "a pinch to grow an inch." And you were fair game not only for family but for any of your friends that could catch you too.
We did and my fiance's family do too. I got to witness my fiance "spank" his nephew who was just laughing the entire time and tried to spank my fiance until he found out my fiance was 27 and just went. "That's too much." The nephew is eight.
We call it the birthday bumps and you got your age plus one to grow on
Omg! We had this but we loved it and called it the paddle machine. The family would stand in-line and the birthday person try's to crawl under all their legs without getting tapped. It wasn't real spankings and only the siblings really tried to get the smack. I thought I was so much fun growing up. Especially when the parents birthday and they try to rush through our legs and then it turns into a horse back ride and the kids playfully attacking the parents. Sounds odd saying it out loud but it was always fun for us.
Had to stop my Brother a few years ago... He thought that was still a thing. None of my children ever got spanked for their B-days and he took up position on my youngest daughter. Nope, nope, NO. I had forgotten about that tradition. In his defense, he is a little clueless. He bought her Tylenol liquid when she had a fever, she was eight years old.
Only time? Lucky you. We got it to "celebrate" or birthdays or to be punished. Very versatile.
It's really gross how many people think this is a normal thing. Even if it's just a light pat, that's still seriously creepy.
I think it depends on the culture and situation you grew in. Do you think holding hands with your male friends (being a male yourself) when outside is okay? Well, it very, very much isn't in my (homophobic) country, but apparently pretty normal in India.
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Is this a variation of the bumps (UK)? Semi-throwing the birthday child into the air and bumping them onto the floor. And one more for luck.
Mostly by my siblings and friends at school, but yeah, that was weird.
Four people holding on to arms and legs throwing you up and down sound really strange now after reading these.
My kids loved getting their birthday spanking from Grandpa. It was never hard, always playful, and he would lose count in the middle and start over several times before getting the count right. Extra spanks included "one to mind your mother" and "one to mind your Grandpa." Even after they were adults, they would ask Grandpa if they were really too old for the fun tradition. We miss Grandpa now that he's gone and the kids, now in their 30s and 40s have fond memories of their birthday spankings.
I'm turning twenty this year and my family is still threatening to do that. But this time... Anyone who dares to try is gonna die. 😑
You from the Midwest? This is definitely common place in the Midwest. Although I've heard of one extra spank and a pinch to grow an inch.
I hadn't thought about that in years, but growing up, that was the tradition. My sisters loved being able to spank me as hard as they could.
In Poland, it's a tradition to get spanked with a belt 18 times on your 18th birthday.
It's not meant to be done hard. It is just playful. Think no harder than your average high five Pretty common in the south. Then you get a pinch to grow an inch. Always resulted in a lot of giggling in my family.
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not spanking, but punches. like, light hearted taps not actual punches. But it was pretty common for people to have Birthday Punches.
That's a thing. There's a bunch of different versions of it in different cultures. It's supposed to be a fun bonding experience and you're not supposed to hit hard.
I used to love watching the fighter jets blast by over my house, I was sad when they closed the local AFB.
Kristen’s viral thread only goes to show how universally relatable this topic is. It looks like virtually everyone has some weird habits from their childhood that just stuck with them for the rest of their lives. On top of that, it proves they inevitably bubble to the surface with adulthood, and often in hilarious ways.
Unsurprisingly, bizarre behavior patterns especially become visible when we find that special person with whom we can create a long-lasting relationship. Of course, relationships are a beautiful thing that makes you feel loved and adored by someone close to your heart. But they also teach you about the world, life, and, most importantly, yourself.
Anyone who’s been with their partner long enough has seen them at their best and their worst and knows the ins and outs of their behaviors. In some cases, however, these little habits seem cute at first but may morph into giant, annoying, frustrating patterns with time. They are hard to break, after all, no matter how pointless or silly they actually are.
When this seems to be the case, experts suggest taking a step back and thinking about what’s truly important. "The weird things your partner does are a part of who he or she is, and some of the reason why you fell in love," Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D., psychotherapist and author of How to Be Happy Partners: Working It Out Together, told Women’s Health.
Tessina pointed out that in any healthy relationship, couples learn to accommodate each other's quirks. Sometimes that means secretly finding them endearing, even if they're still slightly irritating, she said.
Not gonna lie, my favorite is a night time shower with just a candle for light. It helps my eyes get used to the dark and is relaxing before bed
But how come so many people move through life completely oblivious to these unbreakable and utterly weird childhood habits? Turns out, many of us realize obvious things only later in life because we’re wired to move common patterns into the background to look out for more novel things.
"This happens because things that are not obvious, that are not common, that stand out, could pose a threat to our well-being, or could be something really rewarding," Joshua Klapow, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist, performance coach, and creator of Mental Drive, told Bored Panda in a previous interview. He stated that we humans "pay more attention to those actions and interactions that grab our attention. The obvious goes in the background, so we reserve brain bandwidth to notice the novel, standout occurrences in our life."
But as we all know, fewer things feel different and unknown to us through the course of our lives. As adults, we can finally look at the seemingly common in a more detailed way. "And when we do, we often discover that that obvious has so much more to it that we missed earlier on," the psychologist added.
"Another reason we miss the obvious is that we sometimes are not ready psychologically to handle [it]," Klapow said. "A relationship that is toxic, a love interest that is too intense, a realization that we don’t have a skill or strength we believe we have." These things may be crystal clear to the outside observer, but "our own psychological defenses go up and protect us from seeing the obvious. Because to do so might overwhelm us emotionally and psychologically."
"This pattern can go on for years, until which time we either have the psychological maturity or our life circumstances change such that we can look at the obvious which once posed a psychological threat in a more mature, less defensive way."
There were whole generations that thought it was normal. I remember the day that the cane/switch/crop/yardstick disappeared from the classrooms. I think it was in November because I remember we were already talking about Christmas but it was still a little ways off. We walked into the classroom in the morning and it was literally the first thing we noticed when we walked in! That little hook on the wall had nothing hanging on it. Was it broken? Was it hidden for a surprise lashing? Someone had to find out! And what with me being the arsehole hero that I am, I decided I would be the one to do it. I can't remember exactly what I said but, as it was about God, I was guaranteed a wallop. Instead, I was sent outside the classroom and told to stand in the corridor! That night my parents confirmed that, although it was already illegal, the teachers themselves were not liable for prosecution... until now!!!!
Once we realize we lived our whole lives believing our weird childhood habits are perfectly ordinary, it’s easy to feel a bit uncomfortable and self-conscious. Perhaps that’s why, according to Klapow, we feel embarrassed — "the obvious is often simple and clear to everyone else."
The creator of Mental Drive explained we feel this way for several reasons. First, we simply overlooked what others saw: "We may have made mistakes, hurt others, missed out on opportunities because we didn't see the obvious. Lastly, we have to acknowledge to others and ourselves that despite how we think of ourselves or how we are seen by others, we have missed something."
In the UK pigs in blankets are sausages wrapped in bacon. A favourite around Christmas time.
But if seeing your silly beliefs laid out on the table makes you blush, remember that laughing off the embarrassment will surely help. Moreover, it can help you strengthen the bond you have with your spouse, and even help you grow as a person.
Whenever you feel flustered about your quirks, turn the internal dialog around and tell yourself: "I now see things differently, more clearly, and that is going to help me from this day moving forward," Klapow suggested. "Then, the initial embarrassment and frustration can transition into gratitude and excitement for arriving at the discovery of the obvious," he concluded.
Well it was fairly normal (at least here in the UK) that children weren't at the table for dinner with the grown-ups. BUT they would have eaten earlier with Mum in the kitchen or in another room with the nanny if you were really posh. Not defending your grandparents but maybe they sort of remembered the 'no children at dinner' thing but didn't really think it through.
My partner does lemon juice and sugar…there was lots of confusion around this until I realised it was, in fact, a cultural thing.
I loathe these kind of discussions. Everybody is entitled their own taste and you should always be allowed to say you don't like something. But arguments about the "correct" recipe for a meal are just tiresome.
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Erm I and everyone I know puts butter on all bread especially sandwiches !!! UK
Not a big thing but Maple syrup. We tapped and made our own growing up. My wife will only use the store bought fake stuff. Doesn't even know what a maple tree looks like.
In years to come my daughter will be writing on one of these posts…. ‘My Dad used to tell me that animals that were on or next to the road (roadkill) were in fact sleeping after a hard night out and about, no they weren’t dead, they were SLEEPING.’ She is now old enough to know they are dead but she’ll point out the flattest pheasant or badger and ask me if it is sleeping, naturally I still assert that they are indeed fast asleep 😀
Apparently it's not normal to make everything at home. My dad is a chef and we (still) make everything ourselfs. I'm going to name some examples: pesto, broth, tomato sauce, jams and gelees, apple sauce, bread, sometimes butter, and pizza. When I was at the grocery store with my first boyfriend we wanted to make pasta and he wanted pesto so I naturally grabbed pine, basil and parmesan. He looked confused and asked why I wouldn't just grab a glas of pre made pesto. We had pre made this evening and it was okayish but I still prefer the foods and snacks my dad makes.
Definitely not weird. Time consuming but not weird. How greats your dad
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I had no idea this was totally a wrong thing to do: Growing up my mother would pin me down (me layng on my back) and sit on my stomach then put her mouth completely over my nose and blow air. It's like choking on spit. Apparently she thought it was hilarious. Fast-forward to my first serious relationship and he had to tell me 1) never try to do that to him again 2) it's basically abuse
When I was growing up, my mom made me shut my door if there was any noise happening in my room. Watching TV, playing games, talking on the phone, she didn't want to have to hear it, so I had to shut my door. When I started dating in high school, I would walk into my boyfriend's bedroom with them and shut the door behind me. Their parents would come in super angry, "Who shut this door?!?!" Sorry, I don't even think about it, it's a requirement in my house, it's literally muscle memory.
Not putting ketchup in the refrigerator. Ketchup is a shelf stable product and does not need to be refrigerated at all (as long as it is closed tightly), so we never put it in the fridge growing up. My (ex)wife was horrified by this.
My friend likes it cold, her husband grew up with it on the shelf. She buys 2 so they don't have to argue about it, lol
Load More Replies... A teenager who's parents are from the middle east just went far from her home to university. I look forward to hearing her telling me about all the things she thought were normal, but aren't. Like eating chicken and rice everyday for dinner with very little liquid (drinking too much water is bad) ... and wearing pajamas when you return home (regardless of the time of day). I'm glad I convinced the family to have her apply for admission, since it wasn't on their radar.
I always wear pajamas at home no matter what time of day it is (unless I'm expecting company). Why would you not want to be comfortable?
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Pinning your dirty socks together before you put them in the hamper, so when they come out of the dryer they are already paired. thought this was standard laundry procedure everywhere. My college roommates told me they had never seen this before. After a survey of our dorm floor, it was decided that this was not Standard Laundry Procedure.
We all have those washable laundry bags for socks and underwear. Everyone can decide if they want them folded and put away or left in the bag. My husband is the only one who puts them away.
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I didn't think boys got Christmas presents. Every year about 2 weeks before Christmas, my father would pull me aside and remind me that because I was the oldest (by 14 monthes) and the only boy( 3 younger sisters) that I shouldn't get my hopes up and expect anything. He would tell me that since there are 3 of them and only 1 of me, he couldn't justify spending money on me since it was just easier to disappoint 1 child rather then 3. Didn't realize that wasn't how Christmas worked until about 3rd grade after holiday break when our teacher asked us all to write an essay about what we got for Christmas. When I asked the teacher what the boys in class should do since we don't get gifts she looked horrified. After my teacher explained to me that it didn't work what way, I had 1000 questions. I told my dad about what the teacher told me and asked if she was telling me the truth. That's when he finally told me that he saw me as the accident that ruined his life and hated me.
My mother called farts "twizzers" and nipples "tillies". Man, did I confuse my classmates in grade school!
A pox on you and everyone like you. Including my husband. I finally started refusing to make him scrambled eggs. I make them for the girls and me. And he makes his own separate. Usually in the microwave.
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It took years and loved ones pointing it out for me to realize that I could ask for food to be sent back at restaurants, or at others' houses if I didn't want to eat it. To this day, I still have the urge to eat everything put in front of me by someone else otherwise I'll be "wasting it."
Macaroni and milk...elbow noodles covered in milk with at least a stick of butter. I thought everyone ate that but my ex husband never heard of it.
Milk noodles are a thing here in Germany, although my memory of them does not look like macaroni. I think we use the spiral noodles.
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There are three distinct colloquial terms from my part of the country that I literally had to show my then boyfriend (now husband) the terms in print in stores to get him to believe me. JoJos, thunder-eggs, and filberts are real things. 20 years and he still teases me about calling “geodes” thunder-eggs.
Please tell me someone else out there uses the phrase "come back on an eerie-wig" to describe being unsure as to how and when you'll get yourself home. First time I said this to my husband he teased me for about 3 hours and Google got nuthin.
I've not heard this. Reminds me of the saying my grandparents had though, when someone arrived home when we were at the dinner table "who's that walking round my garden tonight? It's only poor old Jim" I have no idea who Jim was or the greater context though.
Load More Replies... Erm I and everyone I know puts butter on all bread especially sandwiches !!! UK
Not a big thing but Maple syrup. We tapped and made our own growing up. My wife will only use the store bought fake stuff. Doesn't even know what a maple tree looks like.
In years to come my daughter will be writing on one of these posts…. ‘My Dad used to tell me that animals that were on or next to the road (roadkill) were in fact sleeping after a hard night out and about, no they weren’t dead, they were SLEEPING.’ She is now old enough to know they are dead but she’ll point out the flattest pheasant or badger and ask me if it is sleeping, naturally I still assert that they are indeed fast asleep 😀
Apparently it's not normal to make everything at home. My dad is a chef and we (still) make everything ourselfs. I'm going to name some examples: pesto, broth, tomato sauce, jams and gelees, apple sauce, bread, sometimes butter, and pizza. When I was at the grocery store with my first boyfriend we wanted to make pasta and he wanted pesto so I naturally grabbed pine, basil and parmesan. He looked confused and asked why I wouldn't just grab a glas of pre made pesto. We had pre made this evening and it was okayish but I still prefer the foods and snacks my dad makes.
Definitely not weird. Time consuming but not weird. How greats your dad
Load More Replies... I had no idea this was totally a wrong thing to do: Growing up my mother would pin me down (me layng on my back) and sit on my stomach then put her mouth completely over my nose and blow air. It's like choking on spit. Apparently she thought it was hilarious. Fast-forward to my first serious relationship and he had to tell me 1) never try to do that to him again 2) it's basically abuse
When I was growing up, my mom made me shut my door if there was any noise happening in my room. Watching TV, playing games, talking on the phone, she didn't want to have to hear it, so I had to shut my door. When I started dating in high school, I would walk into my boyfriend's bedroom with them and shut the door behind me. Their parents would come in super angry, "Who shut this door?!?!" Sorry, I don't even think about it, it's a requirement in my house, it's literally muscle memory.
Not putting ketchup in the refrigerator. Ketchup is a shelf stable product and does not need to be refrigerated at all (as long as it is closed tightly), so we never put it in the fridge growing up. My (ex)wife was horrified by this.
My friend likes it cold, her husband grew up with it on the shelf. She buys 2 so they don't have to argue about it, lol
Load More Replies... A teenager who's parents are from the middle east just went far from her home to university. I look forward to hearing her telling me about all the things she thought were normal, but aren't. Like eating chicken and rice everyday for dinner with very little liquid (drinking too much water is bad) ... and wearing pajamas when you return home (regardless of the time of day). I'm glad I convinced the family to have her apply for admission, since it wasn't on their radar.
I always wear pajamas at home no matter what time of day it is (unless I'm expecting company). Why would you not want to be comfortable?
Load More Replies... Pinning your dirty socks together before you put them in the hamper, so when they come out of the dryer they are already paired. thought this was standard laundry procedure everywhere. My college roommates told me they had never seen this before. After a survey of our dorm floor, it was decided that this was not Standard Laundry Procedure.
We all have those washable laundry bags for socks and underwear. Everyone can decide if they want them folded and put away or left in the bag. My husband is the only one who puts them away.
Load More Replies... I didn't think boys got Christmas presents. Every year about 2 weeks before Christmas, my father would pull me aside and remind me that because I was the oldest (by 14 monthes) and the only boy( 3 younger sisters) that I shouldn't get my hopes up and expect anything. He would tell me that since there are 3 of them and only 1 of me, he couldn't justify spending money on me since it was just easier to disappoint 1 child rather then 3. Didn't realize that wasn't how Christmas worked until about 3rd grade after holiday break when our teacher asked us all to write an essay about what we got for Christmas. When I asked the teacher what the boys in class should do since we don't get gifts she looked horrified. After my teacher explained to me that it didn't work what way, I had 1000 questions. I told my dad about what the teacher told me and asked if she was telling me the truth. That's when he finally told me that he saw me as the accident that ruined his life and hated me.
My mother called farts "twizzers" and nipples "tillies". Man, did I confuse my classmates in grade school!
A pox on you and everyone like you. Including my husband. I finally started refusing to make him scrambled eggs. I make them for the girls and me. And he makes his own separate. Usually in the microwave.
Load More Replies... It took years and loved ones pointing it out for me to realize that I could ask for food to be sent back at restaurants, or at others' houses if I didn't want to eat it. To this day, I still have the urge to eat everything put in front of me by someone else otherwise I'll be "wasting it."
Macaroni and milk...elbow noodles covered in milk with at least a stick of butter. I thought everyone ate that but my ex husband never heard of it.
Milk noodles are a thing here in Germany, although my memory of them does not look like macaroni. I think we use the spiral noodles.
Load More Replies... There are three distinct colloquial terms from my part of the country that I literally had to show my then boyfriend (now husband) the terms in print in stores to get him to believe me. JoJos, thunder-eggs, and filberts are real things. 20 years and he still teases me about calling “geodes” thunder-eggs.
Please tell me someone else out there uses the phrase "come back on an eerie-wig" to describe being unsure as to how and when you'll get yourself home. First time I said this to my husband he teased me for about 3 hours and Google got nuthin.
I've not heard this. Reminds me of the saying my grandparents had though, when someone arrived home when we were at the dinner table "who's that walking round my garden tonight? It's only poor old Jim" I have no idea who Jim was or the greater context though.
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