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“I’d Lose My Marriage, My Kids”: 50 Secrets That These People Keep From Their Loved Ones
At the end of the day, every person you have ever met, including yourself, has some secrets that they will simply never share. Life is complicated and there are often times when telling the truth perhaps just is not worth it.
Someone asked “What's that one secret you can't share with your friends or family?” and people from across the internet shared their hidden thoughts. So prepare to take a deep dive into some folk's only opportunity to vent, upvote the most interesting stories, and leave your own thoughts in the comment sections below.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
I'm learning my wife's native language as a surprise for our wedding anniversary.
unfilteredCigarette73 2 years ago
Hopefully they have a good teacher and not a terrible app or something
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Michael Largey 2 years ago
Some married couples who speak the same language still need translators.
RELATED:
#2
I'm the one who called the police on my little brother. Possession, of illegal drugs, and the selling of them to minors the minute I found this out I called the police
Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
I once asked my sister "if I committed a murder would you turn me in?" She immediately said yes, so now I know she's a decent person prepared to make tough choices and also that I need to turn to someone else if I'm going to have any help with hiding the body.
Shea Fujishima 2 years ago
My mother called the police on my brother(22) when she caught him with a 13 year old girl..
Mary Kelly 2 years ago
take that to the grave...your family and many people close to you will nto understand...you did the right thing...things would likely have been a lot worse if you hadn't intervened
SleepSycho 2 years ago
Mixed feelings on this one—May or may not have been right thing to do. Especially if just weed. Hard Drugs are bad but so are drug laws, so effed up that I prefer confiscation and treatment to getting law involved. Police contact may be the the intervention that turns one’s life around, or gets one caught up in a system that they can’t escape. Have had two loved ones whose lives changed after get arrested for dealing—one has her daughter back and a job, the other is dead.
#3
I didn't "eat at work" I just pretend that I did so my kids don't feel bad about eating when I'm too broke to afford enough food.
Velveteen Worm 2 years ago
My mom did this as well, and I learned many years after the fact that she would wait til we were in bed to eat whatever scraps we left over from the dinner she would make us and it makes me so sad she had to do that for us
Anya Beboop 2 years ago
Don't know why you are being down voted. They are there to help and it's better for you and your kids than to suffer because of some pride. Food banks are great!
Load More Replies... TheAmericanAmerican 2 years ago
This person works 1000% harder than ANY billionaire guaranteed!
Karri Berkowitz 2 years ago
It's sad that anyone would have to do this. And a great parent to protect the kids from it
Kayjunmoon 2 years ago
This poor parent. Such an indictment on our society where there is plenty to go around but poverty keeps people down. So sorry to read this.
SleepSycho 2 years ago
Women in general make up up majority of those in poverty but more than a 1/3 of single moms live below poverty line and almost 2/3 are economically insecure. Many more moms probably done this than we know (mom getting feast instead of flowers next Mother’s Day)
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Mari 2 years ago
Me too. I am always "not hungry" or "I have enough with a cup of coffee". They have to grow and they need the energy.
Load More Replies... #4
I'm contemplating on disappearing from my husband and family. Everyone in my life has been a negative force and has made me depressed for years. I been saving money for the past 3 years and thinking about leaving a note and getting on a plane and disappearing to another country. I don't have children so I have nothing for me to stay here for.
Bear Hall 2 years ago
Leaving a note is a very cruel way to say farewell. If they are not dangerous to you or ways to leave than talk to them. Even if someone makes you depressed they might care for you more than you think. Don't let them suffer if you don't have to.
Sweet Fanny Adams 2 years ago
Is there more to it? They should sit down and talk with each other. Communication is very important.
Anya Beboop 2 years ago (edited)
Hopefully she isn't leaving debt or financial responsibility on him and is saving so that doesn't happen. As someone that is married, if my husband just randomly did this it would destroy my life. Just at least get a divorce first before you disappear so everything is settled.
Janet Sparrow 2 years ago
Omg girl no kids? Pack your bags and go to Paris for two months! Love you!
Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago (edited)
You only get one life, and nobody can live it for you. Don't waste it being miserable if you have any other options.
Kevin Nelson 2 years ago
Yes. Do it. I'm in the same boat and I'm quietly disposing of things so that there is no trace of me. Go find happiness. Maybe I'll see you there.
#5
That one of my friends got really drunk and found my shotgun pumped it and pulled the trigger while pointing at me. I unloaded it that day because I knew we would be drinking. He's no longer my friend and I'd be dead if I didn't do that
Ace 2 years ago
Not only loaded, but not locked away, not even out of reach of visitors. Such a casual attitude to guns make me shiver.
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Joshua Moore 2 years ago
I'm sure I'll get down voted for this, but any idiot who is not responsible with their firearms, keeping them secure, in a gun safe, out of the reach of children, or individuals who are not mentally stable, is the reason why the United States is looked down upon by the rest of the world.
unfilteredCigarette73 2 years ago
Naw man you're right on, the irresponsible idiots have pretty much ruined it and organizations like the NRA don't help, im not against gun ownership but the amount of casual stupidity going on makes everyone look bad, I got rid of my guns when I was going through a rough bout of depression and alcoholism a few years back and happy I did
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Alethea Fletcher 2 years ago
How many times in the US do people need to use guns to protect their property? Genuinely need to protect, as opposed to just shooting someone for raking the wrong turning in their driveway..
Clarissa 2 years ago
And protect property so it's ok to shoot someone? That's not ok. It's just stuff.
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Dogcat vet (retired) 2 years ago
Am in California, bought a shotgun and a 22 for when I move out to the brush/desert area for protection against animals more than anything: only have two dogs: right now in town the two guns are unloaded, have trigger locks, ammo in a locked box, guns in a locked gun case and if I get a home robbery Im going to hit them with a stick. It would take me too long to get them out anyway plus I'd rather not go to jail if I had to shoot someone in self defense in city.
celeste hall 2 years ago
stored loaded and accessible? wtf!! store my guns and ammo separately with the guns disassembled and small parts elsewhere.
Stylishsidewaysbird 2 years ago
My estranged cousin and his friend were drinking and getting high. My cousin picked up his Glock (which was a birthday present) which was apparently just chilling, loaded on the table and pointed the gun and pulled the trigger, hitting his best friend from childhood in the chest and killed him. Guns have no place being loaded and accessible in any situation. Ever.
#6
Mines more on the funny light-hearted side. Years ago my dad got a new mower. My mom was out mowing for him on a really hot day. It should be noted all of us are grown up and out of the house. Anyways my dad came home for lunch and my mom is drenched in sweat and looks miserable and yells to my dad "this mower isn't self propelled for s**t!" Which my dad shows her she has to pull up on this lever and voila there it goes. We continue to give her some s**t for that to this day.
Well 2 years ago we were getting me and my wifes house ready for our backyard wedding to save $. My dad came down and was helping me get everything up and going including yard work. He mowed using my mower and I was doing other s**t. At the end he said to me "man your mower is a piece of s**t. It doesn't self propel at all" and I proceeded to show him basically the exact same lever to make it self propelled. He looks at me and goes "OH s**t I did it too! Nobody can ever know until my death bed ok? Especially Jon". Jon is his best friend.
RajunCajun 2 years ago
my ex called me to come look at her new mower because it was not working right. same thing
ILoveMySon 2 years ago
My sister did this at my house which had a 1/2 acre of hills together with another 1/4 acre of flat area. Poor kid was just trying to help me.
#7
I’m happy my older brother passed away. Yeah, I do get sad here and there, but he was always in and out of jail my entire life. When he was out, he wasn’t really around as he was chasing the next way to make quick cash. He became a junkie at the age of 38 and OD at the age of 43. Left behind 4 kids as well. Now, I’m not happy he died alone and scared, it’s just that I know where he is now, if that makes sense. There is no more worried phone calls from my mom and his kids asking if he’s back in jail, or where he is. When he was locked up, we really didn’t worry as we knew where he was. I can’t tell my mom that, even though she’s is pain from losing her first child, it just doesn’t hit me the same. I also get bitter towards her for always talking about it and my response is “he’s not suffering, looking for his next fix, and we know where he is now.”
I love my brother and always have. But the weight that’s lifted off my shoulders feels amazing.
I truly do feel for his kids though. They never got a chance to meet the awesome person he was before drugs and crime
Littlemiss 2 years ago
I'm pretty sure my husband's family feels the same way about one of his siblings.
Maggie Mae 2 years ago
They May never Say it But Yes they Also Feel that Relief too. We Didn't Force them or Shove Needles into their Veins!! It was THEIR CHOICES that did That!! Knowing Where they Are Brings the Survivors Left behind an inner Peace.
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Zalander 2 years ago
I know my best friend feels this way about her son. And she feel so guilty about it.
R Dennis 2 years ago
We lost my stepson to relapse. My wife feels guilty that she doesn't sleep with her phone up loud at night - she only did it for him... she struggles with every time she is happy, like she is betraying him. I hope one day she stops blaming herself - she was never an enabler and always tried her best to guide him, but he went down this path on his own.
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Kraneia The Dancing Dryad 2 years ago
That you're relieved doesn't make your feelings any less valid.
Veldrin Dalharil 2 years ago
Even family makes choices to be less than they could be. You can mourn that choice without feeling bad for the relief in the pain reduction to the family as a whole. You are a strong person to admit it so clearly and never doubt that.
Ashleigh O'Sullivan 2 years ago
I feel like I know this person, exactly the same story for my cousin's husband, her kids wouldn't be the awesome Ppl they are if he was still alive
Maggie Mae 2 years ago
Yes I Hear you & Completely Understand You! It is Their Abuse of themselves through their Own Choices that Weighs the Rest of us Down & eventually when Death Frees them we Left Behind Can Breathe Again Knowing they are no Longer in Pain & We Know Exactly Where they Are! I Stand in that Ditch Beside You...You Are Not Alone!!
#8
I'm secretly hoping my grandparents pass soon. One has cancer and the other, dementia. Their quality of life is nonexistent. Both of them can't take care of themselves. Once they go, there will be so much less stress on my dad and his family.
I've never seen my dad truly upset, and I've only seen him cry once. I've never seen grief affect him, and I'm scared to. He's always been the "strong" one in my life.
BlitheSpirit 2 years ago
I’m so sorry 😞 But you are right - there is a difference between “living” and “existing”.
Maggie Mae 2 years ago (edited)
But you Can Always Sit & Listen and Get a Person Suffering with Dementia to Talk About their Past that they will Revert to with the Disease & go on those Memory Journey's Willingly With Them You May Learn things About Your Self or your Siblings you Do Not Know!!It Makes Them Feel Safe to Remember the Past with Someone Else!! Try it!! A Glass of Wine or a Cup of Tea & Chat!
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iseefractals 2 years ago
This is one of the worst aspects of "modern medicine" the unchecked need to prolong the inevitable regardless of consequences to anyone, regardless of quality of life. Death is never easy....but it's manageable. Seeing those you love suffer, watching them lose themselves, that breaks you...because that's how you end up remembering them. Not who they were....but what happened to them.
Nonnie Bear 2 years ago
I spent the last 7wks of my Mom's life with her. Watching the cancer consume what was left of her frail body, then her mind. I prayed more than once for death to take her swiftly, because watching her go was brutal.
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Nonnie Bear 2 years ago
Retired nurse here. Worked in Oncology for several years. One thing I learned is there are worse things than death. Watching a 90 person be sick was sad. It wasn't nearly as bad as a young mother fighting for her life, and slowly losing her fight, week by week by week.
Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
First time I ever saw my father cry was during my great-grandfather's horribly painful (and in my opinion unnecessarily prolonged and undignified) final months.
Id row 2 years ago
Whenever I've had a very sick family member, I've always hoped that they go quickly, as bad as that sounds. My great aunt lingered in a bed for years at a nursing home, she was checked out mentally, but her tiny, frail body just kept going. It was so stressful and sad for everyone.
ValdaDeDieu 2 years ago (edited)
How do we get better, more affordable care for the aged in this country? HOW?
Melinda Flick 2 years ago
My mother died about 3 months before the money for her assisted living facility ran out. I was beyond grateful it happened in THAT order.
#9
I am seriously mentally crashing and burning. I have always been considered “the happy” guy. But it was because I chose to be happy and it was a lot of hard work to keep a decent attitude. Over the years more and more gets piled on and you eventually just get tired. I am in my 50s. By all metrics I have it made, but damn if I am just ready to crawl under a rock. It is torture to get through the day.
Wayne E Shelor 2 years ago
Probably some type of brain damage from injuries, toxins, or too much media. Learn to accept yourself or go ahead and throw some money away
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Spocks's Mom 2 years ago
This is me. I'm slowly getting better, but it took quitting my job, not watching the news, and kicking certain people out of my life to even move an inch forward.
Legen ( wait for it ) dary 2 years ago
That's me too. Hope you find or have now a better job.
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Bear Hall 2 years ago
It feels like you are wearing your happy face because you are afraid what the others would think about the real, tired and depressed you. It's serious burden to carry practically every in minute awake. You urgently need expert intervention: therapy and medicine before you do something you would think of as crazy in a sane moment. But know they might only ease your burden, make it easier to get through the day. Mental illness and addiction usually come when life gets too complicated and they'll be quickly part of the problem. But the pain can be eased and one day there might be a miracle drug to make them disappear for good.
Sheri Carlson Peck 2 years ago
Hiding the truth is brutal and dangerous. Find your voice and get some help. Good luck.
#10
That I need a big f*****g hug.
StPaul9 2 years ago (edited)
We all f*** hug you. Doesn't matter who. Hug a person who needs it. This coming from a metalhead.
Sarah Kathrin Matsoukis 2 years ago
I give strong hugs for a short person, consider yourself squeezed
Jennifer Hartigan 2 years ago
Hugs are the best. I think the next hug I get, I'm just gonna crumble and cry like a baby. Today, I hug more
#11
I can't show my mother, the person that inspired/motivated me the most to the creative arts, my work due to it having some LGBT aspects.
For context, we live in a country where gay marriage is still illegal, our highly religious society condems it and violence against it is rampant.
I've seen my mom trying to claw her way out of that mindset and went from religious taught raging homophobia to being "just" somewhat uncomfortable with it but generally accepting. But as she grows older the toxic echo chamber grows louder and she is just too tired to keep fighting it. She just keeps her thoughts to herself nowadays.
It makes me really sad I can't show her how far her encouraging words have taken me, but at this point she just wants to live comfortably. I don't want her to rock the boat and get harrassed by people around her for showing her support and pride for me.
Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 2 years ago
Hopefully a change in the law happens sooner rather than later <3
Ricardo Ferreira 2 years ago
Not if it's a Teocracy (specially if it's in everything but in name), and everything suggests it is. :(
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Donna Peluda 2 years ago
This is so sad. I live in Spain and although homosexual is not ilegale here there are still old religious values that crawl up through the wood work specially in small towns and villages. The "What will the say" One of my closest friends is a lesbian. Her family are very traditional and she can't come out. She "shares" and apartment with her "friend". On her big 50th birthday all her family came from there home town and she couldn't sit next to her GF. The GF was just her flat mate to the family.
BarkingSquirell 2 years ago
You are amazing for thinking of her. I have no advice to give, only support.
Tuesday 2 years ago (edited)
Y’all, is this really necessary. Freedom of belief is a thing. Some people take it to an extent where it harms themselves and others, and that’s not okay. However, the majority of the religious population find comfort and solace in their religion. Who are you to take that away from them?
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Veldrin Dalharil 2 years ago
*hug* My mother lost everything she knew after clawing us away from our abusive father. Her first and staunchest friends out of the shelter were what we'd now call lgbgta+. She never said as much out loud, we just had new uncles, and aunts, and groups that lived 'differently'. I hope, for you, that you can slide art and work slightly into subtle displays so she can display it proudly, and I hope in time she can accept what it means, when you tell her later. I know this isn't ideal, at all. we all want love and acceptance from our family. But in a repressed society I hope you stay SAFE and that your mother can hang art with symbols you feel and she doesn't have to understand to love or explain to those who'd censure her.
ValdaDeDieu 2 years ago
You and your mom need to find a supportive group to lean on. Even if it's merely online.
Michael Largey 2 years ago
At least your mother raised you to be strong enough to find yourself and be that person. Whether she intended to or not.
GhostlySnail (she/her) 2 years ago
Oh I’m so sorry. I have some of the same problems with my extended family, I know it sucks
#12
That I stopped believing in Mormonism 15 years ago. I’d lose my marriage, my kids, and my whole social structure - probably my job. I have to keep going along and make it “look good” or I lose everything.
Catherine 2 years ago
Yeah my husband was born and raised in a Muslim country. All of his family still live there. Half of them are closeted atheists.
Daniela Lavanza 2 years ago
My Muslim husband still believes in God but all the religious stuff is getting on his nerve. When he tells me how the religious people in his community are narrow-minded, I understand why he rejects religions (but not God, who he says can't be blamed for mankind's flaws).
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Joe Publique 2 years ago
Which is why it's a cult. Were it not, you wouldn't 'lose everything' if you chose to stop believing. It might be worth thinking about whether you also want your children to be indoctrinated with the same thought-terminating claptrap, or if you want to show them there's life after sky faeries.
Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My! 2 years ago
If you live in a community of bird-watchers, and have absolutely no interest whatsoever in birds, what do you talk about? If everyone around you supports the Dodgers, and you hate sports, with whom will you hang after work? It's not the beliefs so much as the everybody. If you're immersed deeply in any cultural that you disagree with, you're going to lose a great deal trying to extradite yourself. When your spouse, your children, your parents, your cousins, are all musicians, and you're tone-deaf, are you going to ask them all to give up what they love for you?
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Megalodon Meg 2 years ago
As a Mormon to Wiccan convert-run. Be happy and comfortable in whatever faith fuels you.
Jessica Bertram 2 years ago
Any religion that forces compliance through threat of ejection from the social order is effing evil.
WindySwede 2 years ago
Good for you! Sad you'd have to lose everything just because of your non beliefs!
Andy Smith 2 years ago
I was born and raised catholic. I gave up that god nonsense years ago. There were many reasons I did and I don’t feel bad about it.
Ace 2 years ago
I suspect that to a greater or lesser extent this is true for a huge proportion of 'religious' people. They're just going along with it because it's the thing to do, and social ostracism at the very least would be the result of not conforming.
Skulls.N.Succulents 2 years ago
I can't count the number of people I've asked as to why they believe in their religion and the answer was somewhere along the lines of "because I was taught to believe it" and nothing more. The only ones who have given me actual personal reasons are the ones who chose their religion as adults and they are much happier people. I'm not religious but I am spiritual and have been for as long as I can remember. I grew up going to Catholic Church but was never even forced to "pay attention". It was more like the adults were going so the kids had to go so they weren't left home alone. I'm grateful that my family never forced religion on us as kids but I truly believe it was because they were going through the motions too.
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Invisible Potato 2 years ago
Religion is there to control people. Belive in whatever you want, but dont be part of steucture because that will be used agqinst you
der sebbl 2 years ago
Easy said, but loosing your whole social life is a real threat
Load More Replies... Veldrin Dalharil 2 years ago
peaking as a relative of mormons, please find a non-religious lawyer AND a therapist in your area. The law of the states can override those of religion, so a divorce where you don't lose everything is possible. Hard, but better a fight than passive suic*de through apathy. Your children deserve a chance at other view points. Let them learn and decide.
#13
that no matter how successful they think i am, i am deeply, deeply, depressed. despite being in a relationship, i am intensly lonely and i hate my life.
Tom Brown 2 years ago
Get help, I felt like that for years and waited until everything collapsed before i let anyone in. I wish I had done it earlier. Please don't think you have to go through this alone, there are people who understand
Mary Kelly 2 years ago
go to a therapist...seriously consider medication...try both and make dates...could be even zoom dates...with your friends...also, if you are going to be alone, be busy; if you are not going to be busy, don't be alone....
Couragetcd 2 years ago
Sounds like OP needs to stop living the life everyone around them expects them to live and start living for themselves.
censorshipsucks 2 years ago
I found that I was like this till I started doing community service work. It helped a lot.
Fester Sixonesixonethree 2 years ago
Don't stew in your misery - change your life before it changes you even more!
#14
I’ve always disliked my sister. She loves me and looks up to me and always wants to talk and be near me but I just don’t like her. It started with things like her telling people she grew up in an affluent part of New York when she did not. Or when my mom took her to get her first car and she took photos with my mom but then went to take photos in front of her friends house because it was nicer and posted those so people would think she lived in a better area. Or when I noticed she never shared holiday photos with our family and only shared holiday photos with her in laws in them. Our mom was poor, she’s missing teeth, she doesn’t look like an elegant older lady from a Cialis commercial, but her MIL does and her sister in law is the typical Christian girl autumn instagram mom type. She’s embarrassed by her upbringing and by us, and I think she’s a terrible person for it.
Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
Makes me think of the classic Australian novel "Hating Alison Ashley", where the protagonist Erika is horribly jealous and spiteful toward the new girl Alison for living in a nice house with plenty of nice things and parents who have money, and is arrogant and dismissive toward her own family for being what she considers uncouth and lower-class. But she ultimately finds out that Alison envies *her* because for all the nice things that she has her divorced mother is cold and demanding, while Erika's family is close knit and loving. Before learning her lesson, Erika also has a major habit of telling grandiose lies to try and make her life and family sound more glamorous. (It's a great book! Childhood favourite of mine).
Pandapoo 2 years ago
A little different, but reminded me of the movie Imitation of Life.
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Skulls.N.Succulents 2 years ago
The fact that people are embarrassed by having a poor upbringing boggles my mind. It's not like your parent(s) squandered the family fortune on magic beans! They made due with what they had and probably worked much harder for it!!! OPs sister and everyone else who made it to adulthood despite being impoverished should be proud of the work that went into keeping them healthy and alive with way more hurdles than a wealthy family would've had to jump over.
Auntriarch 2 years ago
Is it okay if I feel a bit sorry for the sister too? She feels she has to deny what she is and where she comes from, she can't be happy
Amy S 2 years ago
Agreed. She must be really insecure to behave like this.
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Michael Braisher 2 years ago
If she's truly Hyacinth Bucket, her time will surely come to fall in a river, keep being barked at by the same dog or be stuck in an attic.
LynzCatastrophe 2 years ago
Mine too. I love my sister, but I just don't like her. I learned early on that secrets weren't safe with her, anything I said to her was parroted back to anyone who would listen, anything I did was equal gain, yet the one secret she really wanted me to keep, I did, even though she couldn't be bothered when the circumstances were reversed. She's older now, we're both in our thirties and I see her for the two faced she is. She cares waaaaay too much what everyone thinks of her to the point where she's ashamed to be seen with me (I have blue hair and very much love to express myself with colours), is nice to everyone in public but talks sh!t about them later, treats her family horribly yet expects so much from us. Two years ago she flew off the rails because we weren't putting in enough effort to make Christmas perfect for her son, yet contributing nothing. He was 2. And I was absolutely disgusted at how much she bought him for Christmas.
LynzCatastrophe 2 years ago
I now ask for the Christmas shift at my job just to avoid this again. I really actually want a relationship with her that most sisters have, but spending time around her is draining, for these reasons and so many more.
Load More Replies... BarkingSquirell 2 years ago
Love and like are are different for instances just as yours. You are not the only one out there - some crazy *sh*t goes on out there.
#15
That I'm at the end of my tether. I can't remember the last time I felt any joy or hope. My days kind of just blend into each other. Employment feels so out of reach. I don't know how I'll survive in a couple of years time. I can't talk to my family about this. They will just scream at me and ask me what is wrong with me. I just wish I had a reason for my misery.
Kimberly Alison 2 years ago
Well your family sounds rather crappy. There is nothing wrong with you. Any chance you can find a therapist to talk to? Life is hard for many of us. ❤️
Sue Denham 2 years ago
If it is hard to get a job try doing volunteer work while you are still job-hunting. They will be able to give you a reference and doing something useful will increase your self-esteem. I wish you good things.
Bewarethere@gmail.com 2 years ago
Yes, my love, it's called depression and there's hope and THERE'S HELP! Please ask 4 help
Andy Cran 2 years ago
you need you.....I estranged myself from my toxic family was the hardest but best thing I ever done (well,in the top ten)....I also got help, group counselling in way of confidence and self esteem wellbeing sessions (if you're in UK please self refer yourself to free NHS wellbeing or MIND)...do it for yourself not for the benefit of others,I wish you well
#16
That my sister ended her life. My parents are japanese and there is a major stigma around it. Have not been able to tell other family and neighbors. So strange having to lie about something that is on my mind every second of the day!
Khall Khall 2 years ago
Ok. I'm sorry if this is ignorant. But...I thought Japan was pretty progressive about this? Has that changed? Does anyone know anything about this or how to find out? There's like 1000s of years of history of this in Japan and I know a lot about that but not the current situation? Sorry I'm not trying at all to be insensitive.
kazuha 2 years ago
I'm half Japanese. In Japan, a lot of people tend to bottle up their feelings and kind of closet any negative feelings they might be having. It's pretty conservative and mental health is not discussed as often as it is here in Australia (where I live now.)
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Jenni Howard 2 years ago
Doesn't Japan have one of the highest rate of suicide in the world? & they used to practice seppuku which would be to kill yourself for dishonour
Tamra 2 years ago
So, you're saying that depression and suicide should be stigmatized? And on a different post, you stated that you'd stop loving someone instantly if the put a foot wrong and did something illegal. You must be the only completely, purely perfect human on the planet to be able to judge others so harshly. Good luck with that. 🙄
Load More Replies... #17
I've created a fictional man and woman in my head that I often imagine being. I have even created a family tree for them and a timeline of their lives.
Kirsten Holmes 2 years ago
That's exactly the thought that jumped into my head.
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HelluvaHedgehogAlien 2 years ago
I daydream about multiple of my story lines in my comics and stuff.
kazuha 2 years ago
Me too!!!!! This is literally what I've been doing since I was 11. I practically grew up with this imaginary family lol
pinkytoes 2 years ago
I find it such a relief to know that Im not the only one who does this
Load More Replies... Velveteen Worm 2 years ago
If they played sims4 they could create those lives and live them all out as many times as they want and in anyway that they please
Skulls.N.Succulents 2 years ago
I read the post and immediately thought "oh, so Sims in your head?"
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Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
Write it down, or draw it into a comic! Even if it's just for yourself, it's great to have a creative outlet like that.
#18
It's been 20 years and I'd still never tell my mom I took her old Honda Civic out to the pub while she was at work once as a teenager. I'll probably still get the slipper...
Hugh Cookson 2 years ago
If it's any consolation, I took my Dad's BMW 750 bike out for a trundle round the local pubs when they were on holiday and I was house sitting in a very rural area in Suffolk, UK. Slightly dropped it into a ditch as I was quite drunk on the way back home. Cost me a shed load of money and a few called in favours to get it sorted before they got back .... Never borrowed it again !!
Georgia Ireland 2 years ago
I told my mom I used to race in her Ford F-150. The LOOK I got plus the way she said my name made me wish I'd waited another decade.
PeepPeep the duck 2 years ago (edited)
I love that I can tell my parents these stupid things and they don’t care now I’m in my 30s, mum will just say something like ‘really? You did that, you little s**t’ etc 😂 then she shares back the parent secret lies they do to us kids etc like - she used to sneak super tiny diced up mushrooms into my Bolognese sauce at dinner (I hate mushrooms more than anything, ever since I can remember 😆 ).
Lila Allen 1 year ago
Do not tell her. Seriously. There is no statute of limitations on this as far as parents are concerned.
Sara Harvilla 2 years ago
45 years ago, I let my 15 yo brother drive our mom's car. He backed into another vehicle. It put a dent in my mom's car right above the back bumper. We have never told her anything and probably never will. (The other car had no damage. It was a low-speed hit.)
#19
I started an only fans to pay for my heart surgery when they think I’m just going to get a loan.
Bear Hall 2 years ago
It was like this since the first sun rise. But now we have the wealthiest economies in the history of mankind. Our medicines are like miracles compared to what they had even like 50 years ago. Though we still don't provide for those who's life could be saved by some money. Shame on us.
celeste hall 2 years ago
And please do not feel badly about yourself for taking of you. As a Trans woman I come from a society where is not uncommon and seen as just what one has to do to take care of yourself.
Jill Jones 2 years ago
Also, start a GoFundMe page. It's a sad day when one must go in debt to stay alive. Prayers to you
Kika González 2 years ago
I tried that, didn't make even two hundred dollars. Then got ashamed online for going to the movies with a friend even though I didn't pay at all
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Apatheist Account2 2 years ago
That's actually quite safe - anyone who sees you on there will have to admit that they've been browsing it, which most won't.
Jon Steensen 2 years ago
I will, but it is not her I am judging. There is something fundamentally wrong with a system that drives people into taking that kind of measures just to survive, and there is something wrong with the thousands of people who roots (and votes) for creating a system like that.
Load More Replies... Bewarethere@gmail.com 2 years ago
You do what u need. I'm not a fan but by God do it! If it helps you be healthy then f**k everybody else!!!
Dread Pirate Roberts 2 years ago
This is so sad and appalling that people actually need to do side hustles in order to get lifesaving care.
#20
That all the invasive medical procedures I had during my childhood made me feel violated and that’s the reason I don’t enjoy any kind of physical contact. Lord only knows how I’ve managed to stay married for so long
Mary Kelly 2 years ago
see a therapist who specializes in ptsd, and find a way to tell your husband...it will likely make you closer
Zedrapazia 2 years ago
Or wife, we don't know what those OP is or what they married
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Andy Cran 2 years ago
I have survivor guilt from childhood cancer,saw and knew of a lot of kids not make it through ....I can understand the trauma of childhood hospitalisation and how it can affect us in adulthood.... please try and be open with your husband if he's a good man he'll be there with you,and get some counselling too (together if need be)...my heart goes with you
#21
I will ask them questions about things I have no interest in, because I know they love to talk about it. I’m super bored but won’t show it, and they think I’m a great listener! I
KingCobraKai 2 years ago
They're a dishonest person, they're the worst kind of friend to have.
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KingCobraKai 2 years ago
No one wants someone to be fake interested. A lie is a lie.
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Your Majesty 2 years ago
Listening is a lost art! People feel lonely when they feel no one really hears them.
censorshipsucks 2 years ago
I do this as well. You are a really good person for helping people feel valued and appreciated.
KingCobraKai 2 years ago
This doesn't help people. Being a liar is spreading disinformation. This is a useless act. Don't pat yourself on the back for an ethical crime.
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Fester Sixonesixonethree 2 years ago
I have a friend who goes on and on about his big hobby and insists I look at videos and pictures of his grandkids. Fine I have no trouble with that. I listen, I encourage, I praise. But when I bring up something I enjoy, he rolls his eyes and gives that nasty little snort of disapproval. So now I look at his videos and just say "nice." I listen to him go on and on about his hobby and I change the subject. Friendship is a two way street. I might be petty about this, but I think you should give what you get, y'know?
Emilee Martin 2 years ago
Even when my friends tell me about stuff, and they are super proud of it but it sucks dìčk, I will say it is amazing.
Daya Meyer 2 years ago
Yes, people like to tell about things and love to be listened to. The only thing that makes me sad ist that I am always the listener. No one is interested in me and my life. It is like "Hey, any plans for the weekend?" - "Yeah, jumping off a bridge." - "Sweet, we are going to XY having a good time with our family blahblahblah..."
#22
That I'm a lesbian.
I've always, ALWAYS loved girls ever since i was still a kid. Never have i feel something more for the boys back then and men's nowadays. Even though i live in heteronomative area. I can only imagine myself with a girl, not the other.. So, i came from a Muslim family, and i am a Muslim too.. ( Don't tell me to leave my religion, for unknown reason my heart feel calm here). Sure, my family is not super religious, but i still don't think i can come out to them. Big chance they'll not kick me from the house, but also big chance they'll be mad at me for several months, they might not accept that their beloved daughter is a lesbian..
Idk, I'm scared.. I know I'm an adult, but still..
Kimberly Alison 2 years ago
Of course you don’t have to give up your faith. God is love, not judgement. I hope you find the girl of your dreams.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 2 years ago
Funny thing, that. OP doesn't have to give up her faith, but her "faithful" family would kick her to the curb and SAY she is unfaithful to her religion, if they found out. God is love and not judgement, but religious people ARE very much judgement, not love.
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censorshipsucks 2 years ago
move to South Africa. We have active constitutional protections for LGBTQ people and a reasonably big muslim community who are WELL aware of the constitutional protections.
Mel Colley 2 years ago
You're probably going to live a very unhappy life if you don't make a change of some sort. Seeking therapy of some kind could help you
Tamra 2 years ago
I don't understand why she is comfortable being involved with a religion that forces her to feel she should keep the truth of herself a secret.
Huddo's sister 2 years ago
Sometimes it's a matter of feeling the affinity with God, but having to live with the constructs God's people have made, because you don't know another way to be. Not all Muslims believe 100% of the teachings of Islam, just like not all Christians believe all theirs. I hope she can find a way to be Muslim without having to hide herself, which might mean finding a group of Muslims who believe as she does.
Load More Replies... Khall Khall 2 years ago
There's no rule, etiquette or morality that requires you to be 'out' to anyone, about anything that they would use to hurt you. If it doesn't break you to keep the secret, keep it. It won't hurt them. Only you.
Tuesday 2 years ago
Hey, I’m a Muslim too (and probably bisexual). Know that being gay isn’t a sin, because we have no control over our feelings. However, acting on it is. It’s just another test for us - a very hard test. It’s easy for me to say, though, because I’m not living in your circumstances. May Allah make it easy for you 🫂
Emilee Martin 2 years ago
My family is catholic and I am Pansexual… can’t tell anyone and it pains me cause this is who I wanna be. When I look at a boy I think DÅMÑ and when I look at a girl I think DÅMŃ ( takes a deep breath ) and I look at any other gender or person with other pronouns I think GØDDÀMÑ
Bad Alchemy 2 years ago
Don't know where you are, but you shouldn't have to lose your family or community of faith when you need it the most. Here are 2 places to look for support: Muslim Alliance for Sexual and Gender Diversity - https://www.themasgd.org and PFLAG ttps://pflag.org/resource/faith-resources-for-muslims/
#23
I was a sugar baby, only for about a year, but it helped me move out and be on my own
Kiaya Thompson 2 years ago
Consenting adults should be allowed to do what they want, as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone.
XenoMurph 2 years ago
It's really not that simple. The relationship is never equal.
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ॐBoyGanesh 2 years ago
I was an escort in undergrad. I was privileged to have my education & housing paid for, but only had a monthly stipend for the basics & maybe a little extra. I was young, much more materialistic, in my sexual prime and thought I was good in bed. I’ve always been outgoing enough to make conversation with anyone. Most friends & family know the basic details of this. What they don’t know is that because of where my school was & hooking up with a renowned escort service, my dates were Hollywood big wigs. From actors to film financiers. A frat buddy worked with me & most sexual activity was between him & me for voyeuristic dates. We both were hired for arm candy & just company more so than physical intimacy. The $$$ afforded me nearly anything I wanted. I’ve been to industry events & shows and have flown private on opulent trips to amazing places. Luckily, this was before the Internet & TMZ, at the time of AOL Messenger & ICQ, so discretion was a given. I really enjoyed it!!
Michael Largey 2 years ago
Before the internet, but STDs have been with us longer.
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Mo Poppins 2 years ago
Is this any different than getting married to have someone support you? I don’t think so.
LynzCatastrophe 2 years ago
Safe, sane, consensual. That's literally my only rule towards anything involving sex.
#24
That in this world of tik tok and social media and the internet, I don’t know if my wife and I are raising our kids the right way. I worry that my kids will never be able to make it out on their own and be self sufficient.
Joe Publique 2 years ago
I don't know a parent who doesn't feel this way. Relax. You've got this.
Sophia Li 2 years ago
Never has a person relaxed when someone tells them to relax.
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Dani 2 years ago
Any parent who worries about how they're raising their kids is doing an ok job. There are no perfect parents. I'm not the parent I thought I'd be, you raise the kids you have not the kids you want, they're all different and need different approaches. There is no one perfect way, no more than there is a perfect child or adult.
Sunshine Lady 2 years ago
Yes. After I left Facebook (didn't have IG, TikTok or Twitter, only FB), there was a period for change and now, 15 months later, I feel free of comparison. I had FB webpage as mommy influencer and I was really deep in that bulsh1t, started because I wanted to be helpful with my experience. I've found out it was all a big lie, I can help new moms around me if they want my advice, otherwise I'm wasting my time. Yes, as a parent I have my doubts, but without social media it's soooo much better!
Nikki Gross 2 years ago
I don't have kids and left social media 2 years ago this month and it was one of the best decisions I've made for my mental health. All of the drama after my Mom passed away, constant comparisons on who and where I am in life compared to others, seeing never-ending me, me, me, etc. Getting off of social media is one of the BEST things that you can do for yourself.
Load More Replies... Apatheist Account2 2 years ago
Don't be influenced by "influencers". They don't know any more than you do, and probably spend their time making "content" because they can't do a proper job.
censorshipsucks 2 years ago
Me too. Make sure you pass on practical skills to them, especially physical stuff that robots can't do yet.
PeepPeep the duck 2 years ago
I’m childless but have kids around a lot, the only thing I’ve noticed is that most of them aren’t as self sufficient at a younger age than the 70s 80s 90s kids (and before). A lot of under 10s I’ve met don’t know how to use a microwave or make and spread some toast etc, it’s just strange to me personally.
LynzCatastrophe 2 years ago
Ignore social media, most of us argue about everything. And nobody agrees on it all.
#25
My GF is pregnant and going to keep it. My friends and family are all happy for me, but if i could choose i would not want a child at this time. I love my independance and freedom and it feels like its all being taken away from me.
Janet Sparrow 2 years ago
I get it but you know you should have taken responsibility for birth control. Sorry honey. You can do this. You don't have to be with the mother. You can say no to that and share custody.
Ron Baza 2 years ago
“ I get it but you know you should have taken responsibility for birth control”. How do you know that he didn’t? Birth control can fail.
Load More Replies... majandess 2 years ago
I was horribly afraid of this. And then I had a revelation: it wasn't me (and my husband) vs. the baby. It's the three of us vs the world. That changed everything. My whole world became new again because I wanted to tell my son all about the cool things that the world has. See these tiny, tiny flowers? That's sand spurry. Cinnamon is delicious! Here, try it sprinkled on an apple. Let's go count the birds in the tree. If you could paint the kitchen a color, what would it be? Walk like an Egyptian! Let your kid see your world; don't leave your world because you have a kid.
Danthropologist 2 years ago
That sounds extremely harsh but it is so true
Load More Replies... Mary Kelly 2 years ago
don't get married b/c you will feel even more trapped, but open your heart and your wallet to this baby, and be nice to the mother...this is what grown up, considerate people do...oh, and let her know now that you have no plans to marry her or move in with her but will be there for the baby...don't string her along...as hard as it is, she doesn't need to you play house if you're not committed
Sandra Morison 2 years ago
Unless you abstain pregnancy is always a possibility. It takes 2 so you need to step up. You don't have to marry but you SHOULD BE A FATHER
Lem Johnson 2 years ago
And if he wants kids in the future? Vasectomy reversal isn't 100% successful and gets less and less likely to be successful the longer they've had the vasectomy. It should always be treated as a permanent procedure.
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Andy Cran 2 years ago
as my father said "if you go paddling make sure you wear your wellies"....time to face up to responsibility my friend,but whatever you do please don't ever resent that child it's not it's fault and that resentment will severely damage your child for life.... that's the harsh reality
S K 2 years ago
I got pregnant whilst on birth control. My ex told me I was trash for trying to baby trap him, but he decided the birth control was enough and chose to no longer wear condoms. It takes 2 and now you decide if your resentment will be too great for your relationship to continue. Be honest and focus on being the father your child deserves, or if you cannot step up to the plate, then again honestly let your gf know you can’t be involved in parenthood. This is coming from someone who wasted 5 years trying to make things work with the dad, despite his emotionally abusive outbursts, some of which my son was present for. Just know that if you decide not to stay for your kid, you may still be on the hook for child support until the child turns 18. I gave my ex the choice and he decided he wanted to stay and try to work it out. Sometimes I wish he hadn’t, but I learned a lot about myself so there’s a silver lining.
#26
How extremely close I am to just leaving everything behind.
Getting in a car and just driving away - boarding the next plane no matter where it goes - just getting on a train and leaving. I think about that daily.
My whole life I kind of waited for things to happen, my current situation is mostly because I almost never take the initiative and do something daring. It’s not that I’m unhappy with my life - it just seems so boring and I feel like I exist more than I actively live.
I have a small amount of money on the side, I know 4 languages and I don’t mind doing s****y jobs to get settled.
Theoretically I could leave right now - but a part of me still thinks I owe my friends and family something and I couldn’t just leave.
Katrina Nixon 2 years ago
You don't owe anyone anything. Your life is yours, to do what you want with.
DJR 2 years ago
That needs a qualifier: if you have kids you owe them a good parent since their existence was your choice. If you have a spouse, what you owe varies but is unlikely to be zero. No spouse, no kids? You don't owe anyone anything.
Load More Replies... 80 Van 2 years ago
My grandfather disappeared for a year once. Just one day without warning left my grandmother and didn’t talk to his family. We knew he was safe, but otherwise had no contact. Then he returned. Nothing was quite the same again. Disappearing for a while to take care of yourself sounds like nice, but it should be understood that it comes at a cost.
Hugh Cookson 2 years ago
If you feel that way, just do it !! I disappeared 45 years ago with much less than you have - moved to another country - didn't speak the language and had a tiny amount of money - struggled for a short while, found a job, did well, learned the language, found friends, enjoyed life and ended up settling there for over 30 years and loved every second I was there. Then I came back to the UK and have been wondering why ever since.
Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
I fantasise about doing something like that all the time. It's not that I don't like it here or have anyone I really want to get away from, but there's just something appealing about the idea of leaving it all behind. Which I'm far too timid to ever actually do.
Skulls.N.Succulents 2 years ago
As long as you don't have minor children or a spouse this is your life to live! People move "away" all the time. For school, jobs and even because they want to live someplace else. You don't owe anyone anything but a simple notice that "I'm moving and I made it" would be more than enough for them to feel better if that's whats holding you back. It's not like you are abandoning them you're just moving away. Totally normal thing to do.
#27
I’ve been uploading music on all streaming platforms under anonymously an alias and have amassed over a half million streams in the first year on Spotify alone. Couple hundred thousand on others. I make underground rap / alternative music.
I take judgement very to the heart which is why I have never told any friends or family, but it’s hard making up excuses of what I do with my time.
Luckily we live in such an era where artists can stay anonymous and focus on what they make not who they are supposed to please in their circle.
Thee8thsense 2 years ago
Well, it seems your music is being enjoyed by many people, so that's worth celebrating, as music is for sharing. However, in life, no matter what you do, there will be people who don't dig it, so I suggest keeping the ones who do in mind, rather than thinking you can please everyone.
censorshipsucks 2 years ago
That's awesome! Upload to bandcamp.com as well please and share your tracks so people can buy direct.
Michael Braisher 2 years ago
I've recorded material as well, on an amateur basis. It's had a few happy fans. But you have to accept that if your family and circle may not be excited abut it, then it's likely purely because it's just not their taste. I've been the same with others who've shown their work. 'I can see how it's good but it's just not me' seems a pretty decent response if you're asked about what doesn't turn you on.
Bored something 2 years ago
Why would you not want friends and family to know this? Why would someone judge you for making music that obviously some people think is good?
Joy 2 years ago
I think it's because people close to you who 'know' you can feel threatened and resentful if you branch out. It's the crabs in a barrel analogy. They can't get out or refuse to try so they don't want you to get out neither. If and when you do the resentment can be fierce.
Load More Replies... Veldrin Dalharil 2 years ago
I do not make music but I publish fiction works under a pen name outside my own country. I understand the twined thread of pain and fear in doing so and I hope some day a family member turns to you for an opinion on YOUR work and you can smile and say it is wonderful.
Fester Sixonesixonethree 2 years ago
I hope you're using distrokid and getting the $$$ from all those streams!
#28
I think my mother helped my dad end his life from a terminal situation.
Katzandra 2 years ago
She helped him keep his dignity, letting him go on his own terms. It may come off as macabre, but in my eyes that is the pinnacle of love and devotion.
DJR 2 years ago
I really hope I'll have the stones to do it without help when the time comes. I will not have anyone changing my diapers for me. I will not "suffocate slightly slower" with an oxygen tank. I will not sit in a bed alone and wait for death to find me.
Clarissa 2 years ago
Sounds like you're ill. I'm sorry. And I think it's right to die as you want. I hope you have the stones to do it also.
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Dogcat vet (retired) 2 years ago
Luckily both of my parents died peacefully from their cancers. As a vet, I don't have the issues with humane euthanasia on any animal if it is to end suffering. Not saying that I'd do it but its a possible.
Amanda Hunter 2 years ago
I'm sure my sisters Dr did the same thing when she was at the end of her life from Cancer. Bless him, saving her from suffering.
#29
I’m not too busy to visit my grandmother before she dies. I hate her and I’ll be happy when she kicks the bucket. I take a lot of joy knowing that I’ll probably never see her again. And when that blessed day comes, I’m not going to the funeral.
RedRose 2 years ago
The saying you don’t have to like everyone does include family. Nobody should have to be around anyone they don’t want to be around
ninjaTrashPandaBoom 2 years ago
And sometimes, family hurts you worse than any stranger could ever. The betrayal is only the beginning...they know where to stick the knife in to cause the most damage...
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David Paterson 2 years ago (edited)
A funeral isn't for the dead. A funeral is for the survivors. Feel free to go to the funeral to gloat. My real advice is to Not, I repeat Not, transfer that hate to somebody else when she's gone. Far too many people enjoy hating and define themselves by hate.
Squirrelly Panda 2 years ago
If you are close to someone who loves your grandmother consider going to the funeral support your loved ones. Be self aware enough to know if you can be polite while listening to people praise this person or if your anger and hurt might explode out. If you can remain calm and polite you go to support your loved ones who are grieving, not to show respect. But it's also OK to say nope, not going.
hwatinternation 2 years ago
Same for me with my maternal grandmother. Never felt comfy with her, and I really don't like her at all. Step-grandfather was the only reason I'd go back to visit, and he's since passed away.
Veldrin Dalharil 2 years ago
Toxic people reap what they sow. It doesn't matter that they are fragile now, what matters is that they did immense damage in their past. Terrible people will always die alone in the end. You have no obligation to meet poison with love. You will remember her in therapy. Not fondly.
Julie Stevens 2 years ago
I've an elderly cousin I will not mourn, nor attend his funeral. Just make sure you keep space for OTHER people's grief when she goes. You can be happy and relieved, that's perfectly valid! Just make sure you don't bulldoze through other people's also valid broken hearts in the process.
#30
I'm married and have been in a loving polyamorous relationship with another married woman for almost 2 years. My wife is also in a relationship with the same woman and her husband. Due to ALL of our religious upbringings, if either of our families or social circles found out about what really goes on with our "best friends", it would be a scandal at best, catastrophic at worst. We all love each other and spend most of our free time with one another but we have to keep a very significant chunk of our lives a closely guarded secret and it's hard. Edit: The husband is my best friend but we're not romantically involved.
Madison Miles 2 years ago
Love this! I too am in a poly relationship, it the healthiest relationship that any of us has ever had. Respectful, loving, honest, understanding...just all around healthy and happy. I'm sorry that you guys feel you need to hide it. I hope more people are comfortable coming 'out' in wanting a nontraditional relationship.
Ashley Harrold 2 years ago
Honestly as long as everyone is happy with the relationship I couldn't care less how many people are involved. On top of which, it's really none of my business.
Tuesday 2 years ago (edited)
Okay, I’m confused, people are generally okay with this, but when a man has multiple wives it’s weird, even though everyone is consenting and happy - which are the current societal requirements?
GettingCereal 2 years ago
I think it's a knee-jerk reaction because the times and cultures in which this was/is acceptable are rarely known for their gender equality. But honestly, my perception is that society is far from being okay with polyamory in general.
Load More Replies... Matthew Barabas 2 years ago
and the issue is? even if its catastrophic and both families abandon you completely, you still have eachother. so.... no loss.
#31
I had to choose my major in Degree under family pressure. I wanted to do something else...
Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
As long as you're alive, it's never too late.
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Fester Sixonesixonethree 2 years ago
I am so sorry that happened. You should live your own life - not the one they've designed for you. Honestly, you don't owe them that.
kazuha 2 years ago
I need advice. I got accepted into my dream law school and I realllly want to be a defence attorney, but my parents think that in the future, AI will take over lawyers' jobs so it's useless to have a law degree. Is this true???
Khall Khall 2 years ago
Don't do this. In 20 years you'll feel like your whole life is wasted.
Veldrin Dalharil 2 years ago
In many countries (not all my research fails me) base and core class credits are applicable to other majors and goals. Talk to an advisor!
Rinoboyrich 2 years ago
Look up Jonny Kim. Navy SEAL, then medical doctor, now astronaut. It IS never too late to make a change.
unfilteredCigarette73 2 years ago (edited)
If you're smart enough to get a degree you don't want you can get one you that do, never too late
#32
That I am a manic depressive person and that I really really have a hard time dealing with anxiety etc. They would just laugh at me and say don't be a wussy...
Red PANda (she/they) 2 years ago
Bipolar should be treated as soon as possible. Every manic/depressive episode can damage your brain and make it get progressively worse, so treatment can be really important.
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Joe Publique 2 years ago
You can't change the people around you, but you can change the people around you.
Nichole Harris 2 years ago
If weed is legal where you're at give that a go.... It's helped me immensely and it's safer than big pharma
Anna Chandler 2 years ago
Imagine if your parents were mental health professionals and still behaved that way... I don't have issues, I'm just a twerp and a hateful little brat.
Chickens are fluffy 2 years ago
There are many hotlines that can give you free mental health care without knowing who you are. 988 is the U.S.A. mental health hotline that you can call. And if you need more help these hotlines and numbers can give you more resources. And if you are worried about money there are many programs that can help you out. :)
#33
That I am planning on my dad moving in with me once he is released from prison. My mom can’t find out beforehand she would lose it. Just keep saying ima cross that bridge when I get there
RedRose 2 years ago
Have some sort of professional person available to help when you get to that bridge
Ace 2 years ago
In most cases (local laws may vary) there will be some sort or probation /parole officer involved to ensure everything works out OK.
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Michael Danhauer 2 years ago
Protect yourself first. Remember that just because you trust someone does not automatically mean the deserve it. Keep on guard with your father. Your mother sounds unreasonable but that usually grows from a seed of rational fear. Best of luck reuniting with him. I hope it turns out how you plan.
#34
I'm asexual. I've tried with my mother but that went nowhere and was upsetting her so I said wow you're gullible and act differently to keep up the charade. I have no interest in sex a relationship with either sex I enjoy me myself and I. Her first response to it how do I know without having a relationship with anyone. Like how people know what they like gay straight ect. Porn doesn't do anything for me. If I'm horny I just deal with it myself and that's that. My father highly religious would reject me so I just keep to myself and enjoy my life. My mother still tries to get me to meet people I just decline the offer it's not me and I won't waste a person's time knowing my stance it's not fair to them.
ॐBoyGanesh 2 years ago
I get the Ace part, but the suggestion is that their asexuality is coupled with a lack of desire for intimacy and partnership, which are not inherently sexual. I know quite a few Ace couples and even more Ace individuals who still date or seek nonsexual companionship.
ValdaDeDieu 2 years ago
There is a spectrum for Asexuality; just as there is for Heterosexuality and Homosexuality.
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Apatheist Account2 2 years ago
It was the line "I've tried with my mother" that I had to read a few times. Be careful how you express these things!
kazuha 2 years ago
I don't understand why being asexual is considered bad? I mean, while I completely, completely support LGBTQ+, I get why a lot of religious people don't approve of it ("being gay is a sin," all that b******t) but how is not being attracted to anyone so bad????
Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
If anything you'd think they'd approve of us asexuals for being so good at resisting the wicked temptations of fornication and whatnot, but apparently not.
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Ace 2 years ago
I don't think this is something you need to hide, but nor is it something you need to share. If family is pressuring you to have a girl/boyfriend just tell them you haven't found the one for you yet. Trying to explain that you'll never want one will inevitably bring "oh but you'll change your mind in time" responses. Not saying they're right. but many people do find that their sexual orientation changes as they get older, so such reactions are to be expected. You don't need to let this define your entire identity.
Dogcat vet (retired) 2 years ago
Never had an interest, never had my parents ask me about my preferences or worry I didnt have a boyfriend...but then we moved every year or two while I was in high school and below (military brat) and then I was in vet school and about 10 years younger than nearly anyone else. Total lack of desire though.
Michael Largey 2 years ago
Some people automatically suspect that being asexual is just a cover for being gay.
Veldrin Dalharil 2 years ago
Asexual AND Aromatic. You don't seek a non-sexual intimate relationship and that's okay too! Not everyone is built that way and historically that is how we developed things like monasteries, hermits in the woods, the village Untie etc. It is perfectly normal, and human, to be a part of the outlying human experience of NOPE.
Julie Stevens 2 years ago
Please don't shut yourself away from companionship simoly because you believe all romantic relationships require sexual contact. There are so many people out there who would love you and adore being with you just as you are!
#35
I wish I married my ex instead of my current wife
Nikole 2 years ago
Reminds me of that saying about the grass being greener when you water it
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Linda Lee 2 years ago
15 years ago my ex left because he wanted 'a son of his own'. He has 3 daughters now. Karma. His mother reached out to me last year and told me that he regretted leaving me.
Alvaro Patricio 2 years ago
If your not Happy. leave! There is a saying" better alone than in bad company" . For me its dificult to understand why ppl think that mariage or living with someone its the only way to go to be happy.... Don't force an entire live with someone unhappy and feeling that that's what you have to satle on. Bad sex is not worth it just because you have it available every day. Has god sex is not worth it to have to deal with a women or men that after you can't stand to be around!!!
#36
Im an atheist and my whole family is müslim
kweeerkwamiii 2 years ago
Yeah me too, most of my family is catholic. I've been baptised & confirmed but I don't believe in any religion.
Michael Largey 2 years ago
Yes, they can meet secretly and not worship together.
Load More Replies... David Paterson 2 years ago
This is a good one not to admit to family. There are probably other family members that are atheist, too, and also keeping it a secret.
Geraint Davies 2 years ago
The sad fact is, that in some countries, athiesm/apostasy is punishable by the death penalty.
#37
My wife is pregnant. We haven't had a scan yet so we're waiting until we know that all is ok and we're a bit further along
#38
I was happier when I was an alcoholic.
Mary Kelly 2 years ago
well, to be fair, you probably were depressed before and while you were drinking...you were self-medicating w/ drink...now that you are not drinking, nothing to mask the pain...please go to a therapist and get medication specifically designed for depression before you start self-medicating again....all the best of luck
Littlemiss 2 years ago
I wonder how your friends and family feel about that? I had a family full of addicts, they made the lives of those around them absolute hell. Their legacies live on.
Jared Robinson 2 years ago
That's called an addiction. gotta retrain nueral pathways to have fun without it. It takes A LOT of time.
Samantha Mannion 2 years ago
See I'm happier without addiction but I definitely FELT BETTER when I was in active addiction. It's all about getting the proper help, therapy, phsych, medications all that makes the difference. We were self medicating and now being sober you have to feel everything and think every thought and it really sucks hard. I'm in the process of getting help it's not easy but fine the right therapist and meds can work wonders on your happiness. Please stay sober and work on yourself it is most definitely worth it.
Midoribird Aoi 2 years ago
Happiness that comes with booze is a facade and the magic wears off with the hangover. No thanks to that life.
nancthetank@gmail.com 2 years ago
You can find a therapist & meds to help you be your best self.
Richard Michael 2 years ago
No, you were used to self medicating and not dealing with reality. It is a hard bridge to cross, but you will get there, eventually, if you keep doing the right thing. I am coming up on 5 years on Jan 1st, and I don't miss it at all. I'm not even tempted anymore.
Kirsten Holmes 2 years ago
Then you didn't do the work of replacing alcohol with healthier coping mechanisms. It's not enough to quit the substance. You've got to change as well. Alcohol is just a symptom of a larger problem.
David Paterson 2 years ago
I used to think that that was terrible. Then I met someone who went off alcohol for a year and hated being sober. Went back on alcohol and is now much happier.
#39
They think I'm single and celibate only because I want to be. While I'm entirely comfortable with it I opted for celibacy because I have insecurities it would be unfair to project onto a partner.
Joe Publique 2 years ago
Sounds more like one of your insecurities is that you feel you're unworthy of being loved. Trust me, almost everyone has insecurities of some description. Your potential partner will be no different. The point is that 'projecting' your insecurities is a choice and something you can control, having insecurities is not. Best of luck, and no matter how difficult things might seem, you ARE worth it.
Dogcat vet (retired) 2 years ago (edited)
I had a 'sex education' class in England (military school for kids) in 1968 at 11 years of age (way before we had anything past info on female issues) and have never had an urge since then. But I have medical issues and don't think I could handle kids anyway. Figured Im asexual now. Got enough nieces and nephews keeping the world populated, they don't need my genes.
Veldrin Dalharil 2 years ago
Respect for the self realization and hopefully you are seeking help in overcoming your insecurities.
#40
My eldest brother, who is over 15 years older than me, is actually my half brother. Aside from my parents, I'm the only one who knows. He's framed his entire life on the lineage of our father, who adopted him when he was 1 when he married my mother. He'll never know. He just had a baby this month, a little girl. Dad is already in love with his granddaughter. It'll be on my shoulders to tell him when my parents pass.
Mary Kelly 2 years ago
do NOT ever tell him...if your parents do tell him, you DON'T...he will feel betrayed and will not be able to reconcile with your parents...
Kobe (she) 2 years ago
Agree. And when the truth ever comes out, you can see that they asked you not to tell, or that you did not know either.... whatever is the most lovable at that time
Load More Replies... MiddleSister 2 years ago
Please don't tell him after your parents pass. He needs the opportunity to be able to ask questions. If they don't tell him take it to the grave with you.
Matthew Barabas 2 years ago
because the truth *always* comes out. always.
Load More Replies... Karen 2 years ago
Why tell him, obviously this dad is better or he would already know
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MEB 2 years ago
He might learn about it if he does DNA testing and then realizes there are no one from your father's side among his matches. Or his daughter might test one day and find this out. It happens a lot and can be quite traumatizing to those who knew nothing about such a situation, especially if they find out that everyone knew, but themselves. I would add that healthwise - for himself and his daughter - it is important that he has access to his biological father's medical history or at least that he's aware that he doesn't have the whole picture and might be at risk for God knows what.
Alex Martin 2 years ago
My mom dropped that rock on my head when I was 18 in a very emotionally painful way. I didn't have a good relationship with my faux pas but is still destroyed our relationship. He has a great relationship with his dad, telling him this may destroy him. He may kill the messenger, ending your relationship. Put this one in mental safe and then bury that safe deep.
#41
That my dad had an affair when he died. Mom never found out and never will.
Dorothy Stovall 2 years ago
You'd be surprised to learn that she probably already knew and had/has her own reasons for the pretense.
Andy Cran 2 years ago
we often don't give credit to the intelligence of others....we tend to treat others like they're stupid or get treated like we're stupid...so I fully agree with @ Dorothy stovall 👍
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Not-a-Clue (she/her) 2 years ago
Probably a language/ grammar issue. If they'd put 'was having' rather than 'had' it would make sense.
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Matthew Barabas 2 years ago
maybe your mom already knows, and considers death to be karma for the affair.
#42
I hate my brother in law to the point I can’t be around him. His a sneaky manipulative loser who just uses people while picking up and dropping friends and family when they are useful. The amount of times I’ve had my fiancé crying on me about the latest trash things his done to her and then in the next breath is defending him. The amount of financial and mental abuse she’s put up from him but because his the golden child the rest of the family won’t hear anything bad about him. So rather then him making him cry in front of everyone and nuking the situation I just stay away and make excuses not to attend family events.
censorshipsucks 2 years ago
I had this s**t in my previous relationship. Psychopathic conspiracy theorist who kept threatening me with violence. Get out or give her the choice to ostracise him. If she can't keep him away, leave her.
ValdaDeDieu 2 years ago
Sometimes, the "Golden Sibling Narcissist" sickness is in the whole family; if she won't agree to draw boundaries, you need to seriously reconsider this relationship. It won't get better with marriage and then you have children to consider.
Babysoup 2 years ago
I can't stand my MIL or SIL. They are narcissistic pathological liars. They expel negativity and nothing is ever their fault. My DH has seen the truth over the last decade but his other siblings still think the sun shines out the a**e. We cut ties long ago and I will never let them back into mine or my children's lives. They destroyed me mentally and physically to the point I believed my child would be better off without me as that's what they drilled into me. Vile humans.
Dawnieangel76 2 years ago
I hate my sister, and resent both her and my brother. I'm 47 years old, the only one with a job, doing without so much to keep a roof over our heads & paying bills. I raised my sister's daughter like my own, and she's 19 with a good head on her shoulders, working & doing college online. Mental illness runs in our family, and while neither sibling has been diagnosed, I'm sure my brother is autistic & antisocial, and my sister is bipolar, and she's an alcoholic sociopath. Before they died, my grandparents told me I needed to take care of my siblings because it's a family duty. I really wish I didn't have such a sense of responsibility & I didn't feel guilty so strongly.
Alvaro Patricio 2 years ago
If you live together, convince her go NC.. and get on with your lifes!
Szzone 2 years ago (edited)
I had a girlfriend who had sisters and one of them was always mean, negative, critical, and especially critical of her, but in subtle ways that flew under everyone's radar. Well she crossed the line once, she made a remark that directly took a dig at our relationship. Nothing too serious but emotional mainpulation about our vacation plans. That's when I, in a moment of frustration, finally spoke out and defended my gf. This was at their family's house, we were teenagers. The parents did everything to smooth things over and my gf was super grateful that I defended her. Well she was then. As early as a week later when we had a minor argument she brought up how I made things harder with her sister. Feom then on, she kept bringing it up in every argument as long as the relationship lasted. I learned my lesson. I shall always keep my mouth shut about a girlfriend's family and never, ever, interfere. I will reconsider this policy only if and when I get married.
Hugh Cookson 2 years ago
I dealt with the person who was doing this to me and my close relatives in what, some might think, was a brutal way. I asked him to come over to my place for drinks and kicked the s**t out of him, then kept him back for a day or two to explain the error of his ways before kicking him out and making him walk 5 miles to the nearest town - his car had already been removed. He moved away shortly afterwards and I've not heard from him for 5 years. Good. I don't condone what I did but he was being so disruptive and vile that something needed to be done.
#43
I never liked my MIL. My spouse and his side of the family have no idea, and would be hurt and offended if I admitted that. She passed a long time ago, so there's no good reason to tell them.
#44
I don't know if it's wise to say it here but... well, substances.
Phoenix(or nix)they/them 2 years ago
What flavor is your favorite? Mine is the one that tastes the way Abraham Lincoln looks.(not really, the smell is nauseating)
Load More Replies... Georgia Ireland 2 years ago
Self medicating is easy to get into, so hard to get out of. I wish you all the best. Been there, done that.
#45
An epic sexual history.
WindySwede 2 years ago
If it was consensual and not cheating, that would just beeing "bringing experience into the relationship"?
David Paterson 2 years ago
Yes. Best not to admit that. Get yourself checked for disease _often_ and abstain when you have one. Far too many people with an epic sexual history don't refrain when they know that they have a disease.
Lavern Defazio 2 years ago
I have had many colorful escapades and would do them all over again.
Hugh Cookson 2 years ago
Ah, if I was of a mind, I reckon I could outdo your epic sexual history by many, many factors - Sadly many, many drugs were also taken around this time so it's all a bit hazy.
censorshipsucks 2 years ago
hmm I am not sure about this one. Mine is colourful but not as big as my partner's, so when I tell her I find it boring she accuses me of being asexual. Whereas I'm actually just... bored of it.
Linda Lee 2 years ago
I asked my BFF if he could name every partner he's ever been with and he immediately said yes. I replied, "then you haven't had enough". We both laughed.
Load More Replies... #46
Just how much any of them makes me unhappy. It's not really one secret since each person hurts me a different way. But I think it's just my mental illness that's really making me feel this. Because I irrationally hate everyone.
Stardust she/her 2 years ago
Same here. I dislike everyone I interact with and get annoyed by my friends even though they’re nice people. I’m annoyed by everyone but I keep my mouth shut most of the time as I can’t deal with the consequences of not doing so
XenoMurph 2 years ago
I found a way to think of everyone as superior to me in some way. Because let's face it, in some ways we are better and worse than any other person. That helps me to admire people in a way I never could in the past. A piece of wood is boring if it is uniform in colour and texture, but if it has flaws and variations in the grain , and knots and gnarls, then it becomes beautiful BECAUSE of those flaws. Learning to love those flaws, or at least to find them quirky and cute, is a much nicer life than becoming annoyed by them. Takes effort, but worth it.
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ValdaDeDieu 2 years ago (edited)
It's not normal to have relationships where you're actively, constantly unhappy with people that you cannot talk to about how you feel and/or resolve how their actions affect you. This is dysfunctional and toxic - you must find a way to heal and/or remove yourself.
Astrophile 2 years ago
Like OP says, it could be due to mental illness. At my worst depression I’m a grumpy lady who doesn’t have any patience for other people.
Load More Replies... David Paterson 2 years ago
Too many people hold on to hatred their whole lives. There is a cure, but it's too complicated to explain here. See a doctor.
hwatinternation 2 years ago
"Each person hurts me a different way" David: ah yes I have the perfect knowledge for this. it is actually *your* fault, there's a cure but I can't discuss it here on a website you didn't even make the post on
Load More Replies... #47
I have two (I've only told my wife these two stories): Growing up my father was the manager of a grocery store. He stole from the store - but it was usually cereal for us kids, crackers for the family, and never a lot and never anything the family didn't **need**. He did it to help us make ends meet. (Yes, it took me until my teen years to realize this). One day my mom took me shopping and be, being a 5 year old during a relatively safe time for a 5 year old to wander around a store unattended (70's) I was in the bakery and my dad walked up to me and shoved a bunch of muffins in my coat pockets (it was winter, so I had a big winter jacket on). When we got home I started to take them out and my mom started to get mad at me for stealing. I told her that dad had put them in my pockets. She instantly stopped, but I can still tell today she was very angry. When my dad got home my mom sent my sister and I to one of our rooms to play. My parents never fought but there was an argument going. He never had me steal anything again. But, the thought that he would use his child to steal from a store. I've always had a disrespect for people who use their children to commit a crime (and yes, it was just some muffins, but still). If you do it your self then you're putting yourself at risk but if you use your child then not only are you putting them at risk, you're teaching them a really bad lesson. The second one, my first serious relationship (mid 1990's, about 2 years long) with the first girl I actually loved. She had a rough home life and was susceptible to bad influences but when she was with me she tried to be a better person (and wanted to be a better person). We were great together but as time progressed things fell apart and we broke up. During one of our post breakup fights she claimed I didn't know anything about her but I told her I was working with the company I worked for at the time to transfer me to the next state so I could be close to the college she really wanted to go to (and help her be able to afford to go). Instantly the anger in her face disappeared and was replaced with self-disappointment. It was the last time I saw her in person. She called me a couple of years later but I had spent the day deep sea fishing with my GF at that time and I was extremely tired (it was rough seas, even for the north Atlantic). I kinda blew her off and she ended up hanging up on me. If I have the timing right, she took her life roughly 6-8 months later.
Shaunn Munn 2 years ago
You are in no way responsible for the actions of your dad and former GF. They made their own decisions. You are responsible for you and any dependents - only.
Hugh Cookson 2 years ago
That is NOT criminal re the bread theft. That is a damning indictment on the political and economic wrongdoing by your government. The fact that your Mum was ashamed by it is entirely wrong, she should have been proud that your Dad stood up to the people who were obviously not paying him enough to feed his family and was prepared to kick back to do his bit and make life better for you all !! Basically, Capitalism is s**t, has never worked and will never work, it will only ever enrich the rich and keep the poor poor. Revolution anyone ?
Bored Birgit 2 years ago
And after your revolution? Show me any political system where the mighty ones are not rich or do not exploit the poor ones. It is everywhere. Life is not fair in general.
Load More Replies... #48
I just realized today I have an over the counter pain killer problem. I don't need to burden my family with the news.
Tyranamar Seuss 2 years ago
OTC? Wouldn't that be like Tylenol or Advil? Not exactly NA level stuff. Maybe you mean prescription pain med problem? That's an NA issue.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 2 years ago
My friend, abusing OTC meds is still abusing meds. Acetaminophen will still eff you up if you abuse it.
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Mary Kelly 2 years ago
um, you need a support network...and if not your family, then someone else
Jessica Reitzell 2 years ago
If actually OTC it could be a matter of rebound pain, and medical intervention may be needed. Talk to a professional.
Michelle C 2 years ago
Please do get help. Please….it’s never too late while you’re still here….💔
Awesome At Being Autistic 2 years ago
Co-codamol is available in the UK as OTC, and it can be addictive.
Daya Meyer 2 years ago
Maybe you would like to burden a pro with these news? A doctor, a therapist.... They are paid for their work and will not judge you for doing it.
Karen Startz Richardson 2 years ago
Get some help for the underlying pain issue. Once that is addressed, take a protective stance in regards to your kidneys & liver...and use those harsh OTCs sparingly. Hugs to you...unmanaged pain is awful.
#49
I'm gay, I dropped out of college, I'm not interested in dating, I cut my hair, I have mental health issues, I use social media, I run an online store, I enjoy user generated content
Ace 2 years ago
"Faking" mental health issues is a mental health issue in itself.
Load More Replies... #50
That I genuinely don’t love them (my parents specifically). I just feel like there is no reason to owe a life debt to two people just because they brought you to this hellhole of a planet. I should be grateful that I’m here? I didn’t ask for this. It’s your fault that I’m here. You can’t pay for things because you gave yourselves a third person to take care of. Not my choice. You want me to give up my contentment to simp for a metaphysical deity that you believe in only because you were essentially indoctrinated into a legal cult as an easily impressionable child? No. I owe you few thousands of dollars that you don’t even want me to pay back. I can’t tell them this because I don’t like hurting people in general. They did nothing wrong to me, really, that’s just what I feel. I’m sorry if I sound entitled, I’m just adding to this thread.
Joe Publique 2 years ago
Angsty teenager. The planet is a 'hellhole? Check. I didn't ask to be here? Check. It's your fault that I'm here? Check. You struggled to bring me up but that's your fault? Check. I don't share your beliefs? Check. Sounds like OP has a lot of growing up to do.
Cindy Mischke 2 years ago
Not necessarily an angst teenager. I feel this way as an adult in my 40s.
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XenoMurph 2 years ago
You have been given an opportunity to live in the most complex structure ever discovered, the human brain. To enjoy foods, and drink, and sensations, to have life experiences and joy and silliness. And you just want to sulk about it?? Wake up and literally smell the coffee and the flowers and the fresh air. Find some joy in this awesomeness we call life.
Midoribird Aoi 2 years ago
This just screams emo teen, rather than someone has a real reason to hate his parents. If they died suddenly, his world will be gone in an instant and he will realize it too late 😭
Midoribird Aoi 2 years ago
And yes he needs a therapist that he will end up not cooperating with.
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The Darkest Timeline 2 years ago
First, you aren’t sorry you “sound entitled,” you feel justified. Second, none of us asks to be born so stop acting like you’re special or your situation is unique. Third, you could have been born in a much, MUCH worse time or place so count your blessings; the fact that you could post this trite, childish diatribe for the world to see proves that. Finally: grow up. You ARE entitled and your parents may be the only ones that care about you so get over yourself.
Steve Hall 2 years ago
Move away, seek your fortune and try to enjoy your life, the life you didn't want.
Explore more of these tags
What do you think ?
Sweet Fanny Adams 2 years ago
If you're feeling low, it is important to speak to someone. Here is a list of telephone numbers to contact around the world... https://www.helpguide.org/find-help.htm
Gustav Gallifrey 2 years ago (edited)
So many times, people say 'Get help', 'find a therapist', have a professional on hand when the times comes', etc., etc. It's like, there, i've told you what to do, now you have no excuse. A lot of these people, and more like them, just don't have the resources to do that. All those kinds of help cost money, a whole lot of money. And even in countries where the health systems do provide that kind of help, those services are usually swamped by drug-addicted clients referred to them for rehabilitation, to say nothing of the dangerously mentally-ill, and people for whom being 'mentally ill' is something of a profession/hobby. Good luck finding one with the time available to help you with your case of depression.
MusicalNerd 2 years ago
Let me just share my favorite online chat line that helps people: https://www.thehopeline.com/
§• Råinbow Påndå •§ 2 years ago (edited)
I wanna run away from home. Im 13, not abused not depressed, the idea of running away is just so…tempting . Ya know? EDIT: Spelling
Linda Lee 2 years ago
I think we've all felt like that. You might want to write down what you want your adult life to look like. Higher education? Apprenticeship? Apartment? Relationship? Kids or no kids? Now is the time to imagine what you want your grown-up life to be and plan the steps to get there. Good luck to you.
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Ronnie Beaton 2 years ago
Love my two grown up nieces, would do anything for them. My brother's a bit of an a-hole who thinks I'm an idiot. I'd be perfectly happy if I never had any contact with my sis-in-law again.
brittany 2 years ago
i regret having kids sometimes. i love my children. i would give them every single organ in my body to keep them alive. i look around at the world and i know i did wrong by them. they deserve to live in a world where they can go to school, the store, or the movies and not worrying about getting sh0t. where people wont judge them or think they shouldnt exist just because they are neurodivergent. i brought them into this world and if something happens to them, its my fault because i had them. the guilt from that is eating me alive.
Tobias Reaper 2 years ago
my best friend doesn't have a job at the moment her partner at the time was the only one working so she didnt have any money for herself other than state benefits she was low on funds and i know she would never ask for help so i sent her £20 so she could buy something for herself and told her i bought lottery scratch card on my way home from her house and wanted to share it with her
Ansi 2 years ago
My secret from my family is that my grandfathers brother killed himself because he was gay. My grandmother told me later in life because we were close and only had each other at the time. My grandmother is gone so I'm the only one left knowing. Even my mother think it was an accidentally drowning. My grandfathers other brother also killed himself but that is not a secret. When his wife died, he cleaned their whole house (so his kids wouldn't have to) and went to the mailbox and shot himself. (He needed to be found, but still, poor mailman) When his daughter got a call from our local priest, she knew immediately that her dad did something to himself. Her parents were buried togheter, just as her dad intended...
Sweet Fanny Adams 2 years ago
If you're feeling low, it is important to speak to someone. Here is a list of telephone numbers to contact around the world... https://www.helpguide.org/find-help.htm
Gustav Gallifrey 2 years ago (edited)
So many times, people say 'Get help', 'find a therapist', have a professional on hand when the times comes', etc., etc. It's like, there, i've told you what to do, now you have no excuse. A lot of these people, and more like them, just don't have the resources to do that. All those kinds of help cost money, a whole lot of money. And even in countries where the health systems do provide that kind of help, those services are usually swamped by drug-addicted clients referred to them for rehabilitation, to say nothing of the dangerously mentally-ill, and people for whom being 'mentally ill' is something of a profession/hobby. Good luck finding one with the time available to help you with your case of depression.
MusicalNerd 2 years ago
Let me just share my favorite online chat line that helps people: https://www.thehopeline.com/
§• Råinbow Påndå •§ 2 years ago (edited)
I wanna run away from home. Im 13, not abused not depressed, the idea of running away is just so…tempting . Ya know? EDIT: Spelling
Linda Lee 2 years ago
I think we've all felt like that. You might want to write down what you want your adult life to look like. Higher education? Apprenticeship? Apartment? Relationship? Kids or no kids? Now is the time to imagine what you want your grown-up life to be and plan the steps to get there. Good luck to you.
Load More Replies... Ronnie Beaton 2 years ago
Love my two grown up nieces, would do anything for them. My brother's a bit of an a-hole who thinks I'm an idiot. I'd be perfectly happy if I never had any contact with my sis-in-law again.
brittany 2 years ago
i regret having kids sometimes. i love my children. i would give them every single organ in my body to keep them alive. i look around at the world and i know i did wrong by them. they deserve to live in a world where they can go to school, the store, or the movies and not worrying about getting sh0t. where people wont judge them or think they shouldnt exist just because they are neurodivergent. i brought them into this world and if something happens to them, its my fault because i had them. the guilt from that is eating me alive.
Tobias Reaper 2 years ago
my best friend doesn't have a job at the moment her partner at the time was the only one working so she didnt have any money for herself other than state benefits she was low on funds and i know she would never ask for help so i sent her £20 so she could buy something for herself and told her i bought lottery scratch card on my way home from her house and wanted to share it with her
Ansi 2 years ago
My secret from my family is that my grandfathers brother killed himself because he was gay. My grandmother told me later in life because we were close and only had each other at the time. My grandmother is gone so I'm the only one left knowing. Even my mother think it was an accidentally drowning. My grandfathers other brother also killed himself but that is not a secret. When his wife died, he cleaned their whole house (so his kids wouldn't have to) and went to the mailbox and shot himself. (He needed to be found, but still, poor mailman) When his daughter got a call from our local priest, she knew immediately that her dad did something to himself. Her parents were buried togheter, just as her dad intended...
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