ADVERTISEMENT

Some nice guys aren’t actually nice, that’s for sure—they’re secretly so-called ‘nice guys’ who hide who they really are and can't ever take 'no' for an answer. Folks who seem polite, mild-mannered, friendly, and genuinely kind one moment can do a 180 and transform into angry, spiteful, and downright toxic people the moment things don’t go their way. Especially in situations involving romance and rejection.

‘Nice guys’ are more than happy to keep up the illusion of fake niceness, but they often show their true emotions and insecurities when rejected. And then their inner beasts come out. Beware anyone who’s within range! But let’s look at some specific examples, shall we?

TikTok user Keiren Benjamin features and voices stories about ‘nice guys’ that he finds online, including a very viral one about a woman getting stalked by a random guy after she went hiking. You’ll find the stories below. Let us know if you’ve ever been in a similar situation before, Pandas.

Fitness expert and entrepreneur Jack Bly gave Bored Panda some advice on improving for the better, the importance of having perspective, learning to self-reflect, building genuine confidence, and moving beyond a victim mentality. Scroll down for his thoughts.

#1

Nice Guys

Nice Guys

Report

Add photo comments
POST
carmisomers avatar
Berry Budgie
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The last message makes me want to circle back to when he said they were similar athletically…

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

Bored Panda asked Jack what advice he'd give those guys who seem to be stuck in a constant victim mentality and see themselves as being wronged by society and those around them. The expert said that people should start off with small tasks and minor victories.

"Do one thing and progress at it to prove you’re not a victim. Lift weights. Help someone. Advance your career. Have a successful relationship," he said. "When you’re successful in one area you build confidence in yourself and that will translate to all of your life."

He added that we need time to adjust to the positive changes we're making in life: "Your brain needs proof around your new identity."

#2

Nice Guy Is Mad That I Have Guy Friends

Nice Guy Is Mad That I Have Guy Friends

PageAccomplished8438 Report

#3

Patience Is Rare Nowadays

Patience Is Rare Nowadays

coconutwheelie Report

Add photo comments
POST
master_minds9_1 avatar
DennyS (denzoren)
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Okay so first of all...brilliant last line by her. Secondly, he waited 9mins...there are songs longer than 9mins.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

A lot of so-called 'nice guys' pretend that they have a lot of confidence in themselves, however, that illusion can quickly shatter when they're faced even with small challenges or if things don't go as they envisioned. When their expectations aren't met, 'nice guys' tend to get angry at those around them. That's something an actually confident person would never do: they would accept being rejected and simply move on.

ADVERTISEMENT

However, true confidence is a skill that we can all learn, though it will take time, patience, and persistence. "Confidence comes from repetition and mastery. The more you do ANYTHING, the more confident you become. The good news about this is everyone is capable of earning confidence," fitness expert Jack told Bored Panda that this applies to all facets of life.

#4

I Genuinely Can't Tell If This Is Satire And I'm Just Too Hopeless To Pick Up On It?

I Genuinely Can't Tell If This Is Satire And I'm Just Too Hopeless To Pick Up On It?

Ilikecosysocks Report

#5

A Comment On A Post About A Woman Begging Her Stalker Of 5 Years To Leave Her Alone

A Comment On A Post About A Woman Begging Her Stalker Of 5 Years To Leave Her Alone

dogfather98 Report

Add photo comments
POST
nfrlprdpr avatar
Mazer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is heartbreaking, clearly he is clueless about how his ill conceived actions are destroying her.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

Jack explained that it's important to reflect about yourself and how you can improve your life, especially in cases where real-life doesn't match up with how you view yourself.

"Responding to failure is all about the story we tell ourselves. Do you tell yourself that you are a failure? Or do you tell yourself you failed, have now gotten feedback, and know how to get better? It’s all our perspective," he said.

#8

Thinks He's A Gift From God

Thinks He's A Gift From God

esteemed_disservice Report

Add photo comments
POST
suuspuusje avatar
Susie Elle
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My man there's reasons why single women are the happiest out of married/single men/women and you're all of them

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

‘Nice guys’ very often embody the traits that some professionals consider to be examples of toxic masculinity, especially with regards to attitudes toward women. ‘Nice guys’ tend to lash out at women when rejected or think that they owe them their attention just because they happen to like them. According to British psychotherapist Silva Neves, toxic masculinity is a “general attitude perpetuated by systemic misogyny.”

The expert told Bored Panda that toxic masculinity is “a set of distorted ideas about what men should be like.” Silva said that these ideas include the suggestions that men should never be ‘weak’ or ‘soft,’ that they shouldn’t ever feel vulnerable, and that they have to “always be winners.”

“Men with toxic masculinity usually have negative views towards women's rights (including their rights to the freedom of their own sexuality) and they tend to be homophobic,” the psychotherapist explained.

#11

Nice Guy

Nice Guy

Report

Add photo comments
POST
katarzynadrozd avatar
Katarzyna Drozd
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Uh, another controlling, delusional guy who can't take no as an answer

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#12

Didn’t Answer His Text For A While… I Never Met Him And We Had Been Texting For A Few Days

Didn’t Answer His Text For A While… I Never Met Him And We Had Been Texting For A Few Days

dnanebrb Report

“A man with healthy masculinity is the opposite to these traits: someone who is self-reflective, embraces their emotions including sadness, anxiety and crying, a man who isn't afraid of their own femininity and believes that women are equal, and therefore are very clear about respecting boundaries and consent with women,” Silva noted how healthy masculinity differs from toxic masculinity.

ADVERTISEMENT

Someone who has a healthy masculine attitude, according to the expert, “embraces gender, sex, and relationship diversities including gay men and transgender people. Someone who is comfortable with their opinions to be challenged and able to have debates.”

#13

He Just Wanted To Treat Me Right

He Just Wanted To Treat Me Right

KamWow06 Report

Add photo comments
POST
abigailwilliams_2 avatar
Call Me Mars
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He just could have left it at "understood, thanks." But NOPE! He couldn't!

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#14

Others: Women Don't Owe You Anything Him: False

Others: Women Don't Owe You Anything Him: False

SkinnyWrinklez Report

Add photo comments
POST
titas-burinskas avatar
Titas Burinskas
BoredPanda Staff
Verified
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"I have studied women for quite some time" sounds like a medieval illustrator trying to convince someone he has seen all of those exotic animals he has drawn.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#15

Damn Her For Not Accepting Gifts From A Total Stranger

Damn Her For Not Accepting Gifts From A Total Stranger

himinsok Report

Add photo comments
POST
master_minds9_1 avatar
DennyS (denzoren)
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How about you see a girl sitting alone at the train station and just leave her alone.

View more commentsArrow down menu

Silva, the British psychotherapist, believes that it’s important to redefine masculinity and how we understand ‘male success.’ “We also need to change the image of 'male success'. So, basically, we need to change society at its core because toxic masculinity is part of a faulty system of thoughts. That will take time, but it can start with all of us doing our parts about it,” he mused.

One of the things that can help, Silva believes, is having more representations of men “who embrace their emotions, talk about them, and show them crying, laughing, or hugging” in real-life and various forms of media. The key point here, the expert stressed, is that men become more in tune with their emotions, instead of repressing them which can lead to a whole host of negative outcomes for them and everyone around them.

ADVERTISEMENT
#16

This Guy Randomly Messaged Me After Nearly 2 Years And Is Mad That I Still Don’t Want To Date Him

This Guy Randomly Messaged Me After Nearly 2 Years And Is Mad That I Still Don’t Want To Date Him

Poem-Hot Report

#17

Nice Guy Was Sympathetic About Her Gma Dying But Passive Aggressive On N*des That Never Happened

Nice Guy Was Sympathetic About Her Gma Dying But Passive Aggressive On N*des That Never Happened

yagosf39 Report

Add photo comments
POST
jitka-zachova avatar
Pamela24
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Gosh, the internet is full of tits, can't you just search for some?! And also therapy, while you're there?

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#18

My Friend Sent Me This Dm That She Got And I Can’t Not Post It Here

My Friend Sent Me This Dm That She Got And I Can’t Not Post It Here

Jiminsrealwife Report

Add photo comments
POST
suuspuusje avatar
sharonlafantastica avatar
Weasel Wise
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Rapist and a racist. But I'm sure he's a nice guy if you just give him the chance he's owed. 🙄

kb0569 avatar
Karl Baxter
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Arseholes who watch violent porn deserve to be condemned to a sexual relationship with their hand for all eternity

mintyminameow avatar
Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

LMAO he waited six hours to type out his assault role play. With the stars and everything. Does he thinks anything in stars is really happening?

kaching12 avatar
Yort
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I got distracted after the ethnic slur by the mismatched “el goblina”. LA goblina, estupido.

ceficatisme avatar
August Martin
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I refused to send a guy nudes online when I was 13 and he had the exact same reaction lmao He "dragged me by my hair" and when I told him I had a buzz cut he changed the positioning

remiflynne avatar
Remi Flynne
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

People need to stop communicating with them the very second they say or ask something off. We won't sway them or win an argument. It just goes down hill. Just stop and block. It takes away any power they feel they have by abusing us.

Load More Replies...
marshafredell avatar
Lovin' Life
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Daydreaming again? That's the only way you'll get the girl!

justviv avatar
vivioh
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OMG……. Another one that needs police intervention.

mtownsendsp2017 avatar
Lioness Nature
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why when the woman isn't interested guys tell a story about how they will rape them and or be physically violent towards them?

ingo_3 avatar
the annoying theatre kid
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i just have that one face you make when your cat drops a dead mouse on your lap

felipe_meyer avatar
Felipe Meyer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

*Pornvictim* probably watches to much of it...or 50 shades of grey

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
See Also on Bored Panda

“Better education is definitely key but it is also down to all of us to challenge it by not allowing toxic masculinity to keep going. It means that we all have to actively challenge misogyny and homophobia,” Silva said that some people still turn a blind eye to hatred. The process of change and a more compassionate, respectful, and inclusive world, he said, is long, exhausting, and an ongoing fight between competing ideas.

#19

Man Had A Chance And Blew It

Man Had A Chance And Blew It

MichelinaOme Report

Add photo comments
POST
c3arbar393 avatar
Jess Thompson
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I’m starting to see that all these men are what they say they hate about women - illogical, over emotional, mood swings, too much talking, desperate, jealous…

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#20

A-Hole From My Old High-School Posted This Unironically Lmao

A-Hole From My Old High-School Posted This Unironically Lmao

Eraredia Report

#21

Comment On A Meme Of A Girl With Cleavage Talking About Her Necklace

Comment On A Meme Of A Girl With Cleavage Talking About Her Necklace

WhettSocc Report

Add photo comments
POST
bronnie69 avatar
Bron
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How to say “I’m a misogynistic POS” without saying “I’m a misogynistic POS”

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#22

Worst Selection And Placement Of Emojis I Have Ever Seen

Worst Selection And Placement Of Emojis I Have Ever Seen

BrownPantsOn Report

ADVERTISEMENT
See Also on Bored Panda
#23

A Gentleman Among Us

A Gentleman Among Us

Nica-sauce-rex Report

Add photo comments
POST
oaklandcami avatar
ForgotMyPWSendHelp
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Repeat after me: You are not owed the benefir of the doubt. You are not owed a chance. If someone does not like you, THEY DO NOT LIKE YOU. They owe you exactly nothing! Get over yourself!

View more commentsArrow down menu
#24

“Cr**gy Night” (Sent To Me By My Friend)

“Cr**gy Night” (Sent To Me By My Friend)

brocksicle Report

#25

My Brother Posted This On Snapchat Lol

My Brother Posted This On Snapchat Lol

AccomplishedFennel10 Report

Add photo comments
POST
mintyminameow avatar
Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nobody asks that anymore. This guy is stuck in like 1992. People either date until they find someone or they stay single and casual.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#26

Dating Without Sex Is Like Being Put On Trial, Who Knew?!

Dating Without Sex Is Like Being Put On Trial, Who Knew?!

katy_07 Report

#27

Ta For Goading Him But It Was Funny

Ta For Goading Him But It Was Funny

why-per Report

#29

We Met Once. He’s 37

We Met Once. He’s 37

northernwild88 Report

Add photo comments
POST
terybriggs avatar
Mama Panda
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sounds like he wants to compete with her past relationships. What a jerk!

View more commentsArrow down menu
#30

Posted Byu/Cecinestpasunlogin 23 Days Ago Silver2 Reaction From “Friend” Of 5 Years To Me Leaving A Party With A Ons- Additional Context In Comments

Posted Byu/Cecinestpasunlogin 23 Days Ago Silver2 Reaction From “Friend” Of 5 Years To Me Leaving A Party With A Ons- Additional Context In Comments

cecinestpasunlogin Report