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30 Women Share The Times They Were Completely Ignored In Favor Of Men, Despite Being Clients
Being ignored is a frustrating experience. But being ignored because of your gender, race, culture, or sexuality is enough to make you livid. Unfortunately, even in the 21st century, being stereotyped and written off at a glance is still possible.
In a viral thread on the r/AskReddit community, redditor Teacherspet5859438e (wow, that’s a long username!) asked the women on the site to share the times that they were being ignored in favor of their male partners, colleagues, or friends, despite them being the clients.
Have a scroll through some of the top responses and let us know if you’ve ever experienced anything similar in the comment section at the bottom of this list. Keep in mind, some of these stories might get you worked up with how unfair they are. Rude? Lacking manners? That’s just the tip of the iceberg...
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
We were buying a new mattress. It was a joint decision for the feel of it, but my decision for the price-point and warranty because I was paying for it. I noticed the salesperson talking to my husband more than to me (the one with the money), but I'm used to it. Then, my husband wandered away as if he'd never seen a furniture store before. Weird, but okay. He came back and said, 'Hey, can I have some money? I'm going to go check out the *insert dumb little decorative thing.*' I was weirded out because I have never seen him care about even a lamp enough to go examine it on his own. But I said sure and handed him some cash. The salesman IMMEDIATELY stopped paying attention to my husband. Suddenly, in his mind, I was wearing the pants. He started asking me what I did for a living and whatnot, and I was able to negotiate for a slightly lower price. I love my husband so much. He knew exactly what he was doing.
WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
The husband knew how to handle a sexist. But to be fair, I would have taken my business somewhere else after telling the salesman that he was a sexist. I would also inform his boss why he lost a sale but won an unhappy customer who was going to tell people about the sexism in this shop.
RELATED:
#2
I'm an Army veteran. My debit card is with a military-affiliated bank. Every time I pay for dinner at a restaurant, they bring it back, set it in front of my husband, and thank him for his service. My husband was never in the military. The card has my name on it, and sometimes, they even have watched me pull it out of my bag! I have also been by myself somewhere, paid for something with the card, and had the person who sees the card look at me and say, 'Oh, was your husband or dad in the military?' Um, no. No, they were not. I was. Thank you.
Josy Bannon 4 years ago (edited)
I'm so furious about this one!! How deeply engraved is their picure if manliness to ignore every fact that is in front of their eyes?!
Shalini Pabreja 4 years ago
Don’t get mad. These are stereotypes enforced by society and media. These people are victims of that programming. The only way to change that is to normalise women in service.
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Sheryl Logan 4 years ago
My mom Was a veteran as well this type of thing pissed her off royally
Ray Heap 4 years ago
This "thank you for your service" thing is totally weird for Europeans, it was tried in Britain once and was found to be cringe-worthy.
Katarina Leaf-Dobbs 4 years ago
Yeah it's kind of weird. But to each their own I guess :)
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Tuesdays Child 4 years ago
How true. Me(active duty USAF at the BX): I'd like to put these on lay-a-way. Clerk: What's your father's name? Me: He's dead. Clerk: What's your husband's name? Me: I'm not married. Clerk: I can't sell these to you. Me: When did you quit selling to active duty personnel?
Starla Campbell 4 years ago
Same. I love when we go to Lowe's and the cashier will see that we get the military discount and will turn to my husband and thank him for his service. He hasn't served a day in his life.
#3
This August I bought a new truck and took my boyfriend with. He is white and I am mexican, we arrived at the dealership and I asked about the explorer they had front and center. Salesman comes over and is asking a bunch of questions to my bf. He told him its for me. I was ignored for the entire conversation. I got up and started looking at the truck. A Hispanic Salesman comes and asks me if I need help. I was out of there within 1.5 hours keys in hand. Found my bf with the other salesman. I looked at bf and said I bought the one I wanted Manny G got me squared away. The look of utter disappointment and anger on the guys face was worth it. My bf chuckled and told said "I told you she was the one buying." Manny you were great.
Kari Panda 4 years ago
I love that story. They woman got good assistance, the boyfriend had a little bit of entertainment while waiting, and the guy got served.
MalP 4 years ago
Similar thing, went to buy a truck, sales creep says he needs my husband for paperwork. I said no, he'll sign when were done. Guy keeps it up, so I walk out. 2 seconds later here comes the manager running after me. Manager had no problem working with a woman. I always hoped the manager got the whole commission!
Nikki Sevven 4 years ago
I always took my dad with me when buying a car. They always spoke to him, ignoring me. After the third time he'd tell them that I was the customer, but they still ignored me, I would loudly say, "I guess they don't sell cars to women here. Let's go to (insert competing dealership)," and turn to walk out. Got the red carpet after that, including better bargaining power.
Suzy the observer 4 years ago
Racist and misogynistic? Two for one deal in the asshole category.
The redditor’s thread got 63.6k upvotes and over 200 awards, proving that it’s a topic that resonated with the online community. Though the thread pointed out that there are plenty of guys out there who have old-fashioned attitudes, there’s a positive flipside, too: some men are more than happy to stand up for their loved ones and coworkers, setting the record straight.
Gender stereotypes, according to the Council of Europe, are one of the main obstacles on the path to “real gender equality” because they lead to gender discrimination. These stereotypes are “preconceived ideas whereby males and females are arbitrarily assigned characteristics and roles determined and limited by their sex.”
#4
My old teacher told me a story about a cold caller. A man phoned the house phone (this was around the 80s/90s when people still had house phones) asking for the man of the house to talk about changing supplier for something or other. My teacher (a woman) told the man that her husband was away on a business trip and to call back the next day. He called the next day, again asking for the man of the house, and she informed him that her husband had been delayed and to call back the next day. He called the next day, and she informed him that due to bad weather his flight had been delayed until later on that night, so please call back the next day. He called the next day, she put her husband on, the man asked about changing to his company's service. The husband informing him that his wife dealt with all the bills and please talk to her. My teacher took the phone, said "no thank you" and hung up.
Cabs Comanchee 4 years ago
LOL, Had a similar happen. But they kept insisting to speak to the man of the house to. So I had a nonstop talker of a son ( 7 years old ) so gave my son the phone told him to tell the nice gentleman anything he wanted. I could hear the man yelling to give the phone back to me. He finnaly hung up. Never called back
jenjie.newt 4 years ago
Not to sound sexist, but it's unwise for anyone to say they're home alone and/or live-in partner is out of town
Gyro Pilot 4 years ago
This is an old, old story. Modern telephone scripts are neutral, e.g. "may I speak with the person responsible for..."
#5
I’ve been on the flip side of this. For years, I worked at bicycle shops and regularly sold some pretty expensive bikes. One day, a couple came in. The wife was interested in a bike, and it quickly became apparent that the husband was an overpowering, dominating type. “She wants to do this, she doesn’t want to do that, she likes this, she doesn’t like that” etc. When it became clear she wasn’t being allowed to do much speaking at all, I would let the husband as the question, and I’d reply by physically turning and giving the answer to the wife, making eye contact with her only and pointedly ignoring the husband. It was pretty blatant. She loved it. She lit up, engaged with me, and genuinely seemed to enjoy the process of learning more about riding and getting into a new sport/hobby.
WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
And so the seeds for a revolt against a controlling jerk were sown.
Logic and Reason 4 years ago
I’ve never understood people like her husband. Are they really so fragile they feel the need to be in control of everything, even other people?
Grumble O'Pug 4 years ago
As a cyclist I can say that the married boys tend to drag their wife along and it's a obvious they are usually the constricted sphincter about the whole endeavor. I love biking alone. No need to be with some guy who's main mission in life is to drop you. yaaaawn.
Louloubelle 4 years ago
I have a neighbor that does this with his wife. And unfortunately, I'm pretty sure she's being abused, either physically, mentally or both.
Night Owl 4 years ago (edited)
Maybe there was a way to anonymously report it, either to some group for abused women that works in the region (maybe they can at leas give you some advice on what to do if not get involved themselves if they are too busy) or even to the police
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#6
I was at Best Buy getting some PC components because my friend asked me to help update his motherboard and processor. The first employee was respectful and sent for someone with keys to get the parts for me. The guy with the keys kept asking my friend what he wanted. And when I would have to answer, he would ask me twice and sometimes three times if I was sure about it. Yes. I’m sure. I have a computer science degree. Give me the processor.
Shadow 4 years ago
First I should mention that I am female and I made a sales person at Best Buy run away... I started asking specific questions about the components of their prebuilt gaming computers (they were at least three years out of date and still wanted over $2000 for them) that were on display. I was in the store for something else and thought I'd look to see what the current tech for computers was as I was planning on building my own gaming computer. The last time I had built a desktop was the year DDR1 memory first hit the market and mentioned that, the guy gave me a look and just turned and walked away. I still don't know what his problem was but since he didn't want to or couldn't help me, I then went to the local mom and pop computer store had a great conversation with the guys there, bought the components I wanted and put the computer together myself.
VeryDarkMatter 4 years ago (edited)
A couple of weeks ago I went to buy a new gaming computer for myself (I am female). The salesman was really nice but also amazed that a woman buys a gaming computer and loves video games like Borderland, Mass Effect, Red Dead Redemption, Fallout, Skyrim, Witcher and stuff. We talked a lot about our favourite games. I think he does not meet many female gamers in his shop. And I also have not one female friend who is slightly interested in computer games. My (girl)-friends think I am odd. One even told me that she consider games a waste of time. But then talks about movies she watched on TV or Netflix.. yes..right.. 😞
Sasha Kuleshov 4 years ago
"Oh, do you know about computers? Name 4 graphic card manufacturers" -_____-
Antonio Gregovich 4 years ago
My uncle has a computer science degree. Upvote this if you also want one
Catherine Spencer-Mills 4 years ago
Big electronics store south of us. Big - not only computer parts but video and games and whatever else you can think of. We go in to buy something and the salesman almost always starts by talking to my husband. Who then points at me and says, she's the computer nerd. I know nothing. The good ones immediately switch their pitch to me.
The Council of Europe explains the dangers of such stereotypes: “Sex stereotyping can limit the development of the natural talents and abilities of boys and girls, women and men, their educational and professional experiences as well as life opportunities in general. Stereotypes about women both result from and are the cause of deeply engrained attitudes, values, norms, and prejudices against women. They are used to justify and maintain the historical relations of power of men over women as well as sexist attitudes which are holding back the advancement of women.”
As with plenty of other sensitive issues, education is one of the key ways how attitudes can be changed. But personal responsibility is just one part of the solution. New government and business policies can contribute to fighting gender stereotypes in the workplace and outside of it. That and reminding everyone that basic manners, like not turning your back to someone or pretending they’re not even there, still mean a lot, even in 2021.
#7
I took my colleague out to lunch. When the bill came around, the waitress gave it to him because she assumed he would be paying. He wasn’t a subordinate, he was at the same level as me. However, I was given a company card, and he wasn’t due to the nature of our jobs. He graciously grabbed the bill and gave it to me, saying, 'She’s the boss.' Smart move: It made me feel validated, and he got a free lunch.
cybermerlin2000 4 years ago
Where ever I go in the UK the waiter/waitress asks who gets the bill
Brandy Grote 4 years ago
It's not hard. Around here, wait staff says, "I'm leaving the check here, I'll be back to pick it up in a few minutes", not giving it to a specific person.
Euni Hinojosa 4 years ago
It happens all the time at Mexican restaurants. I've gone up to the owners and waitresses and told them of a little secret. Always pay more attention to the woman because she tips better than a man.
Elaine Dodge 4 years ago
Why don't waitrons just put the bill on the table halfway between the people sitting at it? The diners might actually be paying individually?
Sharon Ingram 4 years ago
Just put the bill at the edge of the table in a neutral zone. When you bring it back with the card for signature, -lace it in the same neutral zone and say thank you.....to everyone.
Attila Ángyán 4 years ago
They say its the etiqutte that the waiter is communicating with the man at the table only. The woman have to tell her order to the man, and the man have to say it to the waiter. At least in the olden times and in higher class.
Chaotic_pansexual 4 years ago
The guy just said that because she’s the one with the company card. He may have also not been referring directly to their employment position, rather, their general status, meaning in that situation she would be the authority/providing figure which she was.
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I’m a female business owner with a male business partner. I’ve had a few customers and reps born in the Dark Ages who ask to 'speak to my boss. The worst was a guy who snapped his fingers and told me to 'put the kettle on, girly.' Needless to say, he didn’t get his cuppa, and he certainly didn’t get the discount he asked for.
Rissie 4 years ago
I love this topic, because I'm so good at just being honest and making people like this (where it really is not ok) feel very uncomfortable. Just ask what they meant by it and make sure that by the end of that series of questions, they asnwered them themselves and that person is clear about your positiion and how the first question is never ever ok to ask anyone. Not just you.
Ruth Mayfly 4 years ago
I'd agree with a male collegue who had a sense of humour that I could call him in and treat him exactly as disrespectfully as the original guy had to me, and he'd be all deferential. People really squirm when you hold a mirror up to their behaviour.
Nomadus Aureus 4 years ago
Ooh, I know this one from my one time as an intern. Was always made to make coffee and clean up after everyone. Then got flack for not being as involved as the male interns. Was still too young and shy to remind them that the reason I wasn't attending the case was because of an order of fifteen coffees prepared in fifteen different ways.
Sasha Kuleshov 4 years ago
How about a cup of hot water in your nether regions motherf*cker?! >:D
uber mensch 4 years ago
I'd be tempted to snap fingers back and reply "Duck you, a$$hole - I OWN this place".
#9
He wasn't my husband, not even my boyfriend, but a guy friend I happened to have around when a carpenter came to fix something in MY home. I welcomed the joiner in and started talking to him about the issue. Then, he saw my friend and did a 180° to talk to him. He literally turned his back on me while I was mid-sentence. In MY home.
Meike H 4 years ago
I had a similar experience in a DIY shop. I asked a male employee a question about something that needed to be done in my house. When he started to explain my younger brother, who came to the store with me, positioned himself behind me to listen in. As soon as the guy saw a male face he turned a couple degrees and continued his explanation towards my brother. Never looked at me again. It is so utterly humiliating.
WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
So you threw him out of your home? Which is what my wife would have done.
Michael Green 4 years ago
If I were the carpenter, I would -at most- just try to talk to both of you equally at that point. I'd assume it was perhaps also his house. But to literally turn his back on you... what the actual hell.
Cordi Schmidt 4 years ago
I would love to hear the aftermaths - the guy explaining he's got nothing to do with her flat and that she is the boss. :D
#10
I have a chronic pain disease that runs in the family. I noticed that my father and male relatives have no problems securing pain meds, but my doctors would never give me any — despite me clearly indicating how much pain I was in. So I started bringing either my father or my husband to my medical appointments (which is hugely intrusive), would have them repeat how much pain I was in, and low and behold, suddenly I get pain medication.
Rissie 4 years ago
Find. A. New. Doctor. Or just openly discuss this. It's hard, but chronic pain is harder. F them for being assholes and shoving their sexist attitude in your face.
Samantha Lomb 4 years ago
Its a general trend for doctors to be dismissive of women's pain. That's why it takes years to get problems like endometriosis diagnosed. Its even worse for people of color. Studies show doctors consistently give black people less pain meds than whites. Given how widespread these issues are I am not sure changing doctors would make much of a difference
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Cigdem Kanburoğlu 4 years ago
As an anesthesiologist and also had been educated in Chronic Pain: For chronic pain, it is harmful and addictive to use "pain medicines" which are mostly opioid. But only in America doctors give them easily. (because of the medical firms mislead). That led America to a massive Fentanyl Crisis. There are other methods for pain than opioids, I hope you can find a good Pain doctor (an anesthesiologist with Chronic Pain Education) and have a better life. (as I have a condition to cause chronic pain, I feel you)
WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
Report the guy for being incompetent and sue him for all the time he left you in pain because he was a sexist and refused to give you the proper medication.
Cynthia McDonald 4 years ago
I have been insulted and belittled by doctors for years. They dismiss my symptoms and have even outright called me a liar, despite having lab work that clearly indicates my disease. I have to take MY HUSBAND with me to doctors appointments. Seriously. I'm more educated than he is, I make twice what he makes, I handle all the bills and responsibility in the house. But I'm a 5'1 hispanic woman and he is a 6ft tall white bald guy with a beard and tattoos, and for whatever reason, that makes ALL THE DIFFERENCE in medicine. When he comes with me, I get exactly what I need. It's infuriating.
Ozacoter 4 years ago
Its the same for me :( My partner always wants to come to the doctor to support me. But I really hate that because then the doctors ignore me completely and talk to him. About MY diseases. The worst part is that he doesnt realize so he keeps chatting with them.
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Batwench 4 years ago
This is a common thing across the medical world, the gender bias is real and I am a victim of it. There has been a number of articles published about it over the last few years. Here is one from the BBC Website: https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20180518-the-inequality-in-how-women-are-treated-for-pain
Maria Ribaulo 4 years ago
I took my hard-of-hearing Aunt to the doctor a few times and the nurses were fantastic but the doctor never addressed her directly (she did well if you faced her and spoke at a moderate level) even when she was the one asking the question. So every time he said something, I turned to her and repeated every word he had said until she completely understood.
Brandy Grote 4 years ago
Once I had spine surgery and my degenerative disc disease was diagnosed, I was able to get proper pain meds for that AND my fibromyalgia!
#11
Oh, comic cons. I’ve learned to just tell men that I’m not that into comics when they try to ask me what I’m into. Otherwise, half the time, it turns into an interrogation where they try to prove I’m 'not a true comic fan. I’m a comic book artist.
Rissie 4 years ago
Well, just because you draaaw them, doesn't make you a real fan, you know. /end sarcasme again and again and again.
Random Person 4 years ago (edited)
Very smart to mention that it was sarcasm or you would be at the bottom of the comments with "this comment is hidden" and 27 downvotes probably.
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Saara-Elina Kaukiainen 4 years ago
Same thing happens if you tell them you're a gamer. Like: dude, I'm not a gamerGIRL, I'm just a gamer. Leave it.
Jayne Kyra 4 years ago
"But if you don´t play *insert game title* you are not a real gamer!" What I get told often. How dare people have a preference, right?
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CrunChewy McSandybutt 4 years ago
Same as a Star Trek fan. Any declaration of loving Trek will result in a Jeopardy-style quiz of the most minute details of obscure fanfic.
Jibek Mechler 4 years ago
I’ve got to say I’ve had a pretty positive experience as comic book fan. Steer clear of 90’s comic lovers and the guys are usually pretty nice about having a girl into comics
Shinomi Chan 4 years ago
This is annoying and very much gatekeeping. Just because someone doesn't remember/know EVERYTHING about something they like, does not mean that they can't be a huge fan/love something with all of their heart. Like, I like so many different series and comics and games, even though I sometimes have difficulties remembering some plot points and or character names, doesn't mean I don't/can't love it such as much as everyone else.
#12
When I had my appendix taken out, I asked my doctor when sex would be okay again. He turned to my husband and said, 'Whenever you feel ready, you can begin sexual relations again. I don’t know if he was uncomfortable talking to me about it or was deferring to what my husband would prefer. Either way, it was strange.
Josy Bannon 4 years ago
It's the conception that men indicate and want Sex while women don't want Sex and do it to please men.
Louloubelle 4 years ago
Wow, this is the worst one. When HE prefers? Well, let's not allow the patient to heal and make their own decisions. Jeez.
Brandy Grote 4 years ago
Ew. And medical malpractice. Doc doesn't know if her husband cares how she feels either.
Grumble O'Pug 4 years ago
I would of said "doc, unless you think HE has a vagina you better swing you head around, dipshit"
#13
I was trying to collect a parcel from the post office that was addressed to both me and my husband. They told me that my husband had to come to collect it. I asked whether they meant both of us had to be there, and the response was no, just him. Needless to say, I was not happy. After a while of arguing, they gave me the parcel.
Josy Bannon 4 years ago
Postofficer lives in the past obviously and not even seems to see something wrong with that.
Aunt Messy 4 years ago
That's happened to me half a dozen times - and ONLY at the post office. One snot bag of a woman demanded to phone him, so told her to knock herself out. If she wanted to call India (he was there on business for two weeks) and wake him up in the middle of the night, SHE could be the one to get yelled at.
C.S. E. 4 years ago (edited)
I'd really like to know that, myself. I've worked at the window for the USPS and as long as your name was on the parcel and you had ID, you got it. The only exception would be for Restricted Delivery. Why didn't they ask for the supervisor?
Load More Replies... Nikki Sevven 4 years ago
The thing to do in this case is to remind them that delaying the mail is a federal crime, as is refusal to deliver mail that has been paid for.
Caroline Driver 4 years ago
I'd be tempted to say 'why, do you need a d*** to collect a parcel here? '
#14
We had our backyard completely relandscaped. When the landscaper came over for the estimate, he almost exclusively addressed my husband — even though I'd made it clear I was the one doing the designing and knew what I wanted to be done. Afterward, when I paid him, he kept looking behind me for my husband. He almost didn't give me the aftercare instructions for the new sod, saying he wanted to make sure it was done right so he'd email them to my husband. I finally snapped, 'Give me the damn piece of paper, Bruce! I'm the one who will be home during the day to do the damn thing!' (I worked nights at the time.) He reluctantly handed it over and called my husband the next day to make sure the lawn got watered. My husband told him, 'You'd have to ask her, Bruce. She told you she'd do the damn thing,' and hung up. I had, indeed, done the damn thing.
Charlotte 4 years ago
Yeah, this guy wouldn't have got past the estimate stage with me. He's made his sexism clear, why give him your money and hang around for more bullshit?
#15
My husband and I wanted a fence around our house. A man came over to give an estimate during a workday. I was ready to sign the papers, and he said, 'I’d rather talk to your husband about the numbers and get his signature since he will be the one paying for it.' I asked him to leave my property and never come back. I have always worked from home, and my husband has always worked in a field where he cannot take time to meet with contractors, etc. He and I agree on terms upfront, and then I make decisions from there. It doesn’t matter in life, but for this story it does: I make more than my husband. For the fence, we had already agreed on this company based on various factors, and the estimate had ended up being less than we expected to pay. We had already agreed on this company based on various factors. A man came over to give an estimate during a work day, which ended up being less than we expected to pay. I was ready to sign the papers and he said “I’d rather talk to your husband about the numbers and get his signature since he will be the one paying for it” I asked him to leave my property and never come back.
Brandy Grote 4 years ago
I wonder if I come across more firmly. I've always gathered bids, supervised the work, and paid while husband was at work. My job to keep the house going! My people deal with me, and it isn't a problem.
Toni Alabakovski 4 years ago
Wasn’t this pretty common back then? I was born in 1980, so I don’t really remember.
WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
I would have called another contractor in his presence and ask the if they were sexists too, before telling him to f**k off.
#16
When my husband and I were looking for our first house, he had just graduated and still had student debt. I had been practicing law and had $20k saved for the downpayment. The real estate agent only spoke to him, even if I asked the questions. In one house, we went to look at the basement, and the guy said, 'You don't want to go there. It has spiders.' I told my husband that I wouldn't ever buy a house from him Later, the guy ran for office, and I told everyone the story, including a woman that called me randomly to promote his candidacy. Turns out, she was his mother. It's a small thing but indicative of his attitude toward 'the fairer sex.'
Hadesdaughter 4 years ago
I wouldve marched right in there grabbed a daddy long legs and placed it on that guys head
#17
I was trying to buy a TV, and my boyfriend came along to help carry the box. Every time I asked a question, the employee would answer by turning to my boyfriend and talking to him. Even when my boyfriend said stuff like, 'I don't know, it’s her TV,' the employee still faced and made eye contact only with him. I was getting pretty irritated. The last straw was when I was handing him MY credit card, and he turns to my boyfriend to ask if he wants the two-year warranty. Finally, I snapped at him, 'IT'S NOT HIS TV! I AM BUYING THIS TV! STOP TRYING TO SELL IT TO HIM!' I was pissed, and it was the most irritating and sexist customer service I’ve ever experienced.
tuzdayschild 4 years ago
There is no way on earth I would have completed that sale. And I would have told his supervisor why.
Nikki Sevven 4 years ago
I would have taken my business elsewhere, then sent a letter to corporate headquarters.
Chaotic_pansexual 4 years ago
Sometimes even if the current situation or experience is bad, the particular product and price you’re looking for is in that company. She wanted that tv and I assume at that price, so it probably didn’t cross her mind to drop the purchase and go somewhere else at that moment.
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Jesse Ferland 4 years ago
How in the hell can people actually think this sort of attitude is even remotely okay. What the f**k is wrong with these people? Clearly they belong in the 50s...
Philly Bob Squires 4 years ago
Yeah, I'd put that TV back on the floor, gave that idiot the wheretofor and walked out and bought it somewhere else.
#18
When I was a baby, I wouldn't 'latch on' when my mother breastfed me, so I wasn't eating well. The doctor completely ignored my mom and only talked to my dad because she was 'too hysterical.' He was on the verge of finding out what that looked like.
Cori 4 years ago
This is why I have female doctors. I tried a couple of male docs. One was a scheduling error (married couple ran a practice together). I was ill and fairly out of it so I forgot to specify Karen and got Todd instead. Todd felt the need to put the stethoscope down my shirt despite me just wearing a tshirt. I had even skipped a bra because I felt too crappy to bother and assumed I'd be getting my regular doc. So yeah, creepy Todd felt the need to look down my shirt while I was so sick I could barely stand. Then, after Karen moved, I tried a male GP who was recommended by my pharmacist. I have ADHD. This yahoo decided that, despite me telling him I had successfully been on the same med for years, that maybe I really didn't need that medication because I was probably just depressed. 🙄
Shinomi Chan 4 years ago
Okay then Doctor. Please do ignore THE ONE WHO GAVE BIRTH to the baby, who y'know is also the one FEEDING it.
CATMONSTER2018 4 years ago
How do you know how old you are??? someone told you...
Load More Replies... #19
Not exactly this scenario, but it rankles me to this day. There was a particular car I wanted and I wanted it with a manual transmission, which was tough to find in that car. There was one at a local dealer that was near my office, so I stopped in during my lunch hour to see what they'd do on price. At the time, I was a young, professional woman in my twenties. The car was for me and I was paying cash. I wander in around noon on a Tuesday. No one even acknowledges my presence though there was NO ONE else in the showroom. Finally, I go up to one of the salespeople and say "Hey, do you still have [model] car? I thought you had one in stock." The guy looked at me, in total seriousness, and says in a very condescending tone, "Oh, honey, you don't want that car, it has a manual transmission. Let me show you these others that would be better for you." Ummmm, wtf? After the initial shock wore off, I looked at him and said, "Well, first off, my name isn't 'Honey'. I have a name which you'd know if you'd bothered to ask. Second, I know what I want and don't need you to tell me. I think we're done here." And, with that, I walked out the door. I ended up finding the same model, manual transmission, at another dealership about a hour from my house. TOTALLY worth the drive. I did most of the deal over the phone. The salesman DGAF that I was female. We got to a price we could both live with and the deal was done. SO MUCH BETTER. Drove that car until it died about 10 years later. The first dealership went out of business about a year later. Can't say I'm surprised.
Ripley 4 years ago
My previous car was a manual, bought new. When I told the dude at the dealership I wanted a manual he high-fived me. I think that attitudes to women are a lot different here in Australia than they are in the US. It still happens sometimes, but this level of sexism just doesn't seem to be anywhere near as bad here.
Remi Flynne 4 years ago
I don't get his level of sexism in the UK either... just not been my personal experience. Maybe it was a thing decades ago but these days people respond to whoever asks the question and whoever seems to be the purchaser or decision maker and that's usually pretty obvious.
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AzKhaleesi 4 years ago
This reminds me of the first time I bought a brand new car off the lot. I brought my guy friend, only because he had offered to co sign (I was going through a divorce and ex POS screwed me royally) I had worked 3 back to back doubles in Law Enforcement, and just came off my third double, Read: No sleep in almost 2 days save a couple hours. I went up to the Salesman and told him, "I apologize if I'm curt but I'm exhausted and just want to get this done so I can finally sleep" I want a (model), manual transmission, ANY color... ANY color but silver, I hate silver. This MFER brought me to a silver automatic. My friend died laughing in this dude's face and straight said, you did it now. The dealer looked at me and was like, no no, it's got a CVT. I cut him off, "yea yea a continual variable transmission, which is a stick for pussies that can't drive stick... Look dude, I was raised by a mechanic,just because I have a pair of tits, doesn't mean I don't know what I want. Unreal. SMH
Roxy Eastland 4 years ago
This just shows how much of this nonsense is quickly and provably cultural and not biological. In the UK most people get a manual licence and drive manual cars (although automatics are become much more popular), and the idea that woman can't handle manual transmission just isn't a thing, even amongst chauvinists.
Yeah, you heard 4 years ago (edited)
I was looking for a car one time (about 2010, in UK) and was on my own. The salesman's first question to me was "what colour do you want". I said i didn't care, i just wanted something which was reliable and economical. He said "oh come on, colour is the most important thing to you girlies!" I told him it wasn't, and left.
Rob Williams 4 years ago
In the UK automatics are rarer than manual. I mean... why buy a nice car and then take all the fun out of driving it?
Kismutt 4 years ago
Yes,yes,yes! I live in Canada and trying to find a manual car or truck is ridiculous. I finally found a manual Toyota Tacoma and I love driving it!!
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Maria Schneider 4 years ago
Some years ago I owned a Triumph three cylinder motorcyle. It started to run unround... I'm damn good with mechanics and it only took me some minutes to find out that the spark plug of the middle cylinder was the problem. Soon after I had a checkup with the motorcyle at the dealer's (needed for the guarantee), so I told the mechanic to replace the middle sparc plug. When I came to take the bike back, he (quite a very nice guy) told me that he didn't believe me and checked about everything to find the problem - finally realizing that I had been right. Didn't charge anything for the lesson 😃...
deanna woods 4 years ago
Car dealing is seen as a men's business and some moronic salespeople haven't gotten with the program that this is not appropriate anymore.
#20
I was the guy in the scenario but I was at a comic con with my girlfriend. It was her idea to go to the con as she actively collected comics (I have a pile of graphic novels but usually don't bother with individual issues.) At one booth there was an indie artist trying to hawk his new book. He saw us both looking through a copy and came over to engage. He started talking to me but then she asked him a question about the book. He gave a short answer and then tried to talk to me about the book again. She just got an annoyed look for a second and then moved onto the next booth. I set the book down and cut him off to say "sorry dude, she's the comic fan, I was just looking at the drawings" and then moved on too. Assuming I was the nerdier one was acceptable. Still a somewhat sexist assumption, but if you look at the traditional gender split of a comic con it's a reasonable assumption. But once she tried to engage and he ignored her in favor of a male then that just showed he was an idiot. And seeing it first-hand I really kind of felt bad for nerdy girls who have guys gatekeeping nerdy things or assuming the girls don't have the right to be interested in them.
Hadesdaughter 4 years ago
Well I like that you were the Male who noticed this and not just kept going without consulting your GF
Roxy Eastland 4 years ago
I also accept that in some environments it is more usual for males to be involved, and sometimes someone might be told 'I don't know, ask him' by a woman more than once, but it still makes sense to approach each new situation with an open mind and address everyone equally until you know where everyone stands. *Especially* if you're trying to sell goods or services, for goodness sake.
Brandy Grote 4 years ago
Yeah I walk away from those tables, and buy from the ones that talk to me about their project. I spend THOUSANDS at cons, and still find overt and subtle sexism from people wanting to sell.
#21
At work, I was meeting a new vendor ('Pat') that was to be servicing one of the facility systems I oversee. Pat had already met the facilities engineer (also a man), who was introducing me to Pat. Instead of talking directly to me, Pat shook my hand, turned to my coworker, and asked him, 'And what does she do here?' A few weeks later, Pat had the unpleasant opportunity to learn that I’m the one who calls him when his company falls through and doesn’t deliver. Needless to say, I was not overly polite about it when Pat failed to do his job.
WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
The second encounter with Pat would have been a splendid " In my office, NOW" moment to tear him apart.
#22
I work on male-skewing TV shows, and a lot of my colleagues are male. I'm the showrunner, and I direct the shows. We hire local drone operators, so when we meet our drone team, I give them an overview of what we're looking for in the shot. Conservatively, 75% of the time, follow up questions will be directed to my male colleagues. We hire local drone operators across the US and globally. No matter where we go, it happens. My colleagues are now in the habit of just staring back in response, letting it get real awkward, and then saying, 'Ask her.'
#23
I'm not a woman but I witnessed this scenario. I've posted it on reddit before but here it is again A little more than a decade ago I (male) was at a party with a few friends and a whole bunch of strangers. I got into a conversation with another guy about our work. He was a programmer and I was a physicist, and at some point we started talking about quantum computing. He asked me a whole bunch of questions to which I gave answers, but my subfield was not quantum information. Fortunately my friend came to the party with me, and she was also a physicist, and specifically a quantum computing specialist. As soon as I saw her cross my field of vision I waved her over thinking she'd both appreciate the conversation and be able to contribute a whole lot more than I could. Y'all. Even after I introduce her as a fellow physicist and quantum computing expert, the guy kept asking me questions. And I kept being like, "I honestly have no clue, [friend], you're the expert, what's going on there." And like, I deflected three or four questions that way before I think he got the hint that maybe he's addressing the wrong person. He changes his conversation strategy so that instead of asking me about QIS, he starts trying to show off, to her, what he knows about it. Like, in his brain this flipped from an opportunity to learn more about quantum computers to an opportunity to get laid showing off what little he knows about the subject. So he's mansplain-flirting quantum information science to a woman who had literally built and programmed what was, at the time, one of the world's only functioning multi-qubit quantum computers. I wish I could say I watched her die a little inside, but apparently this was so common a kind of occurrence that she was inured to it, and just laughed and went to get another beer.
Roxy Eastland 4 years ago
Can someone please explain this thing men do which is apparently trying to chat a woman up by proving to her how much more they know about something than she does? I've had it done to me and even if it's quite true that the guy knows more than I do it just makes me feel like he's investing energy in making me feel small, and I just want him to go away. Only afterwards I'll realise it was probably meant to be flirting. I'm talking late eighties/early nineties so before 'negging' was a supposed technique.
Logic and Reason 4 years ago
I’ll do my best to explain my understanding of it. I’m a man and I’ve never done this because, well, I’m not a misogynist, but I’ve seen other men do it. I believe it stems from wanting to seem like the stereotypical ‘alpha male’ if you will, and for some reason in their minds that means they have to belittle everyone around them, especially women. It’s a mixture of their own insecurities, the expectations they feel they have placed upon them, and a sprinkle of sexism.
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Elaine Dodge 4 years ago
You wished you could say you watched her die a little inside? What? You wanted to see this? You, sir, are an asshole.
Eva B 3 years ago
He most likely meant, that he wished it happened to her the first time ever, when it does make one 'die a little inside' ..but the fact it didn't make her 'die a little inside' means, that she experiences this kind of sexism far too often, which is so wrong and unfair.
Load More Replies... #24
I once caught some hunters trespassing on my property. I wasn’t rude to them at all, I just waved from the other side of the field. The next day, they show up at my house. One gestures towards the police car in the driveway and asks to speak to my husband about hunting in our woods. I was like, 'You can talk to him if you want, but that’s my cruiser, and this is my land, not his.' They still insisted on getting permission from my husband.
Josy Bannon 4 years ago (edited)
I mean, even after their false (sexist) assumptions are clarified they still don't accept reality, that's really stubborn.
Linda van der Pal 4 years ago
I guess your husband told them 'no, you can't hint on my land' (thinking: because it's hers)
Kimberly Reetz 4 years ago
“Well my husband is deployed and won’t be back for a year. Come back then. Stay off my property.”
#25
One time, I described my car problem to the desk guy at the auto shop as a 'clicking' when I turned the key and asked if they'd check the timing belt. He said I'd have to leave my car there, so my husband arrived 10 minutes later to pick me up. The mechanic came out and asked him what was going on with the car, never looking at me. I finally asked if he'd checked the timing belts as I'd asked the guy at the desk to do. He had not. Gotta say, mad turned to cocky when it turned out to be the timing belt. This happens a lot with auto repair.
TexasPK 4 years ago
My dad taught me a lot about cars. I had a 1971 Pinto that I bought with my own money when I was 19. One day it was sluggish, jerking, noisy, etc. I took it over to my dad so he could check the cylinders before I took it in for warranty repairs. I then took it into the dealership and told them which cylinder was misfiring. The guy looked at me and said they'd have to check it out. I looked him dead in the eye and repeated myself again telling him which cylinder was the culprit. He insisted upon checking it while I stood there. I will never forget the look on his face when he had to admit I was correct.
Andrew Bridge 4 years ago
To be fair they would have to check it out. If they were good mechanics they'd want to find out why the cylinder was misfiring too
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QuokkaVibes 4 years ago
Once while I was driving the car broke down. I'm not really into mechanics, but I'm also not a clueless idiot. I call the guy I was gonna meet to tell him my car stopped on it's track and refuses to start again. He offers to come and "fix it with cables", I told him that wasn't the problem because my lights were on. He didn't listen. Another Guy stops seeing me alone in the dark with my car with the hood on and offers to use the cables. My dad on the phone said it was the battery. FINALLY the tow truck came, looked at my car and said "It's clearly mechanical, it isn't the battery" and that point my father and my friend asked why and I had to scream in frustration "THE F*****G LIGHTS ARE ON AND THE RADIO IS PLAYING FFS" Tow guy laughed and told them "to listen to the smart one" AHHHH THANKS FINALLY
Dave In MD 4 years ago
It is possible for a battery to have enough life to run the lights and radio but not be able to start the car. Having said that, a bad battery will not stop a running car.
Load More Replies... Dave P 4 years ago
I know a woman who is a senior engineer and team project leader at a major defense contractor working on 100Million dollar plus systems for the military and she used to get these type of things all the time. That is why she now uses only one repair shop because they treat her with respect there.
Alexis draskinis 4 years ago
As a mechanic's wife, i get this a lot. Granted, im not the mechanic BUT ive picked up a few things here & there just from him. Plus since he works days, i sometimes go & grab his parts for side jobs. Nothing funnier than being asked "are you sure this is what you need? Maybe you want to schedule an appt?" only to fire back "is it the part he ordered? & no since its not for our cars"... Apparently my vagina should be gettjng lost in the parts dept, even when picking up an specifically ordered part...
Phil Boswell 4 years ago
I always love the opportunity to recommend that everyone watch "My Cousin Vinnie" ❣
TexasPK 4 years ago
Great movie!! Loved it when she identified the tire tread and car down to the last detail!!!
Load More Replies... Brandy Grote 4 years ago
Like, dude, I checked codes already. Let me just pull my OBD so you can put your machine on.
Rene Simons 3 years ago
I never tell the desk guy what I think is wrong with my car. They tend to look no further than the direction I give.
Ann Abdelzaher 4 years ago
Oh man reminds me of the time the starter went bad on my Taurus. Came out of class and car wouldn't start. knew immediately what it was. Called AAA and my husband. AAA came towed the car and my husband and I followed. went to my usual mechanic (got there right before closing) Saw the guys I usually deal with and waved to them when the owner came out. He looked to my husband and asked what was wrong with it. My husband said, ask her and I told him that the starter was bad and needed to be replaced. He huffs and puffs and starts telling me it couldn't be the starter and he won't know what is wrong with it until his guys look at it tomorrow. I told him that this was the third car I have owned that the starter went bad and I know the symptoms. (the mechanics were watching all this with smirks because they knew I wasn't some dumb bimbo) next day owner calls me and says we know what' wrong with your car and it will cost $X. ... It was the starter.. he never gave me grief again.
CharliAnn Olney 4 years ago
I built a '76 Triumph Spitfire from the Ground up. Literally. I started with a chassis and a body. Ordered the engine and transmission and with the help of the equipment at the Base Auto Shop dropped it all in and did all the rest! Yet, EVERY time I went in to work on it, Some jerk would wander over to tell me what to do! Go AWAY! I was building Stock cars with my brother before you were out of diapers, begone!
#26
I ordered a grill from Lowe’s for curbside pickup and called my best friend with a truck (who is male) to drive. The Lowe’s dude took forever before coming outside MULTIPLE TIMES to let my friend know the grill is missing, give him status updates, and apologize. The whole time, he's looking my friend in the face and ignoring me. Every single time, my friend says, 'Talk to her. I’m just the ride.' Women are allowed to make purchases. We like food, too. Friend earned major additional kudos that day for calling out the Lowe’s dude’s sexism.
Bonnie Edwards 4 years ago
What is Lowes? In Australia, it's a menswear brand. This sounded like food up until they said the grill was missing.
Star of the world 4 years ago
im late (sorry), but lowes is a hardware store, like home depot
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#27
We wanted to replace our roof and had found a company that was running a promotion. I called and scheduled for someone to come out for a quote. I was able to answer all of his questions, but he refused to give me a quote without my husband present (with some 'sign before we leave for best price' excuse). He was intent on driving back over the following day when my husband would be home. I called their main office shortly after he left and told them that I wasn't interested in any high-pressure sales tactics, I just wanted a quote, and if they wouldn't give that to me, the one who would be paying for it, then to not bother coming back out. I didn't see them again. The three other roofing companies I contacted had no problem dealing solely with me.
Rissie 4 years ago
That's the thing, most people are ok and act normal. It's just a few that stand out. And clearly many people accept their behavior, or otherwise they wouldn't be doing that job.
Kristin Ingersoll 4 years ago
Except it happens all the time, so it's not just a few. It's a lot. It's not all., thankfully And I'd like to think the majority of people don't think like this. But ask any woman, and she can tell you at LEAST one story, probably numerous stories, just like this. So... It's not just a few. :(
Load More Replies... deanna woods 4 years ago
Any business that allows their employees to behave this way is only hurting themselves.
#28
We were buying a car for me. Because we were paying for it outright but financing the minimum amount, we had to sit in the salesman's office for an inordinately long time answering questions. The salesman — who was great in every other way — would ask my husband the questions. My husband pointed at me and said, 'I don't know, it's her car.' The salesman said, 'Of course, but we all know how it goes, right?' and kept asking him. We both wanted to get the paperwork signed and get the hell out of there with the car, but we were also on the same wavelength wondering how far we could go with this. So, the salesman would ask my husband a question. My husband would blatantly turn to me and repeat the question. I would answer him, then he would turn back to the salesman and repeat exactly what I'd said. The dude never got the idea that maybe he could just ask me the questions. We bought my husband a car later and put both of our names on the paperwork. When we had to sign, the finance guy saw that my last name was different and asked when we were getting married. He was confused when we said, 'Er, eight years ago?'
Remi Flynne 4 years ago (edited)
Edit - I edited the comment and missed a bit out. It was just a point of comparison.
*sigh*, The Yellow Teletubby 4 years ago (edited)
tf is "we all know how it goes" supposed to mean??
Brandy Grote 4 years ago
Both our cars have both of our names on the titles. His has his name first, mine has my name first. His last car had my name first for some weird reason...
Suzanne Haigh 4 years ago
My husband and I have been married nearly 18 years and I did not take his name, no law says I should.
#29
When my parents and I went to look at colleges, the admissions guy opened by shaking my dad's hand, constantly directed questions at my dad, and would look to him for confirmation whenever my mom said something. My mom is defacto the money person of our family unit. She manages the family finances and investments, and she was way, way, way more qualified to comment on things like student loans or expected contribution. When we left that meeting, she was absolutely furious that she had to basically fight the admissions person to have a normal conversation.
WilvanderHeijden 4 years ago
The father could have immediately set that admissions guy straight. "I'm just the brawn, she's the brains. Talk to her or fight with me."
Caleb Lumpkin 4 years ago
i agree. thats how it works in my household. dudes are just the workers,protectors,and lovers of the house. Women? their everything else. us dudes dont know squat. im 15 and i already know that
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Martha Meyer 4 years ago
Am I the only one who finds it embarrassing that this person took their PARENTS along at all...?
Joseph Kuhlman 4 years ago
I was gonna make a snarky comment about how you might have chose the wrong college since it’s choose not chose, but that would be mean so I’m posting this and being honest. Sorry
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#30
When I was shopping for a car, the salesmen at every dealership kept talking to my husband instead of me — even though I was the one who contacted the dealerships and made sure to introduce myself first. My husband got sick of it and started telling them, 'Don’t talk to me, it’s not my car. Talk to her.' I wound up buying from a saleswoman who treated us equally — until she pretty quickly figured out my husband was not involved whatsoever in the decision.
Boopie Dew 4 years ago
I went shopping for a car alone. Usually if I go with my husband they tell him all about the car, engine, whistles and bells etc. When I went, no shiz first thing he showed me was the trunk space for groceries. Told him that didn't matter to me, next car he showed me he did the same thing . I just left after that. Since I worked up the street at a restaurant I knew his boss, so I let him know this guy had blown a sell to show me the Trunk!! The last thing I cared about on a car i was interested in buying. Needless to say I heard later on his boss gave him the wtf talk. I was SO pissed but felt better after ratting him out to his boss!! Didn't go back to that dealership either. Just to not give them my business.
Brandy Grote 4 years ago
My reply to seeing the trunk is to wonder out loud how many dead hookers it will hold.... Bemused stares, cautious backing away.
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MiniMaus 4 years ago
That can work the other way too. I walked into a dealership and a woman sales person tried to sell me the car. She had no idea how the car worked during the test drive and before that she kept trying to show me the cars on her computer instead of in showroom so I could actually see the car - #facepalm. The manager of the dealership ( man) had to take over
Shosh Grinberg 4 years ago
i asked a male carpenter to my house to build a new kithcen. me and my husband were in the kithcen. i noticed that whenever he talked about hight of the sink or something he addresed only me, and when he talked about cost - to my husband. i asked why and he simply said "because a wonan is usually in the kitchen". he didnt build my kitchen.
Rukkia 4 years ago
This happens all the time. When I bought my last car I shopped around. I was looking at a Tacoma, and the salesman drove it off the lot and to a quiet street before letting me drive, and wouldn't put more than 10 miles of gas in it. My husband was with me, but spent most of his time wandering around away from me because he knows how these things happen. I was getting irritated with this guy, but was moving toward the, "what is financing going to look like." He asked me what bank my current loan was through, and I told him. Since it was also my insurance company, he snidely tells me that he needs my bank not my insurance. I told him my bank and insurance were the same. He told me ,"Why don't we just wait for your husband to get back so we can get your bank information." Got up, told him my husband would have no clue (I was the only one working, and I managed bills) and left. Funniest part, the manager is a good friend, and the salesman got fired for being sexist.
#31
So a while back my wife and I were hitting up local dealerships trying to find a replacement car for her 2006 Nissan subcompact. The first thing I would tell each salesman was that we were shopping around for a daily for her to drive. Honda dealership was stereotypical car salesman "We can't even let her take a test drive unless she shows intent to buy" Ford dealership ignored her completely and tried to sell me a mustang. Toyota was like, "oh you must want to look at our (insert soccer mom vehicle here)" But when we got to Mazda I told the sales guy the same thing that we were looking for her next car, and he immediately nodded, turned to her and asked "what do you look for in a car?" And then he just listened to her. He didn't ask me anything for the rest of the time we were there, focused entirely on her and answering her questions. Never rushed her or pushed her towards a different model. So yeah we'll probably be getting her a soul red Mazda3 cuz of that guy.
Ren Karlej 4 years ago
Why did HE have to start the conversations though? When I've gone to buy a car I start the conversation and then they carry on talking to me. So why couldn't she go into the dealership and say she's buying and see what happens. His starting the conversation could have skewed who they saw as 'in charge'. His saying it was 'for' her doesn't mean that she's the one making the decisions. Let her do the talking in the first place.
NMN 4 years ago
Maybe she prefers that way. I do. I prefer my husband to do greetings and introductions, I just don't like doing those.
Load More Replies... EQXL 4 years ago
At Mazda they're just happy to finally get a customer ofcourse 🤣. Ofcourse that's just a joke, but in the end lack of listening to who you're selling to and what they want is cocky behaviour thinking they're stuff sells themselves.
Lucas 4 years ago
I know you say you are joking but why is that funny when applied to Mazda? I don't have one but haven't heard anything weird about them either.
Load More Replies... #32
I was at a Mexican restaurant with my husband. I don't eat cheese or dairy, so I was looking for items on the menu that didn't list those as ingredients, and I found shrimp tacos. The other tacos on the menu did list cheese and 'white sauce' as ingredients, but I thought it made sense for shrimp tacos not to have those ingredients, so I didn't bother telling the waiter "no dairy." I mean, the menu didn't say they had dairy in the first place, so I thought I was in the clear. The tacos came out smothered in cheese and white sauce, so I sent them back and told the busser (different person than the guy who took our order) that I was sorry, but I couldn't eat dairy. The waiter came storming out and asked my husband why "she" (me, sitting right there across the table, obviously capable of speaking) sent the tacos back. I told him that I couldn't eat dairy, and that the menu didn't say they had dairy on them. He ignored me and told my husband that "she" should have expected there to be cheese on all of the tacos, so I asked why it didn't say that on the menu. He continued to ignore me and told my husband that "she" had no right to send food back, because "she" wasn't paying the bill, and he would only talk to the one who was. My husband told him that he needed to talk to me, the one with the problem, so he stormed off to get the owner and called me a b**** on his way off. That was the only thing he said to me. We got up and left without paying the second he walked away.
Samantha Lomb 4 years ago
I thought one didn't normally pair cheese with seafood ( except maybe crab, cause crab fondue is awesome) anyway. I would not expect cheese on a shrimp taco.
Kari Panda 4 years ago
Simply going away was not a good solution imho. Maybe the owner would have been a reasonable person. Since they left, it was only the waiter‘s word against nothing.
Dorothy Parker 4 years ago
If there is something you can't eat, you tell the waiter. You can't make assumptions. The waiter was wrong, but the guest was as well.
Lillukka79 4 years ago
But it's reasonable to trust your food is what it says on the menu...
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Becca Gizmo the Squirrel 4 years ago
Oh hell no. If I heard the dude call me a b I would not leave until he wss put in his place. Either by me or the owner/manager.
#33
When we were having our house built, the lady helping us kept saying that the house would have WiFi on all three floors. We asked to have ethernet cables run to certain rooms, and she laughed and said, 'Well, he can have one run to his office, but you'll be fine with WiFi.' I was like, 'No, I would like one as well.' We both play games online, sometimes MMOs, and wanted hard lines run. She just couldn't understand why a woman would need anything other than WiFi. It made me angry for her to make the assumptions. My husband is awesome and regularly tells contractors to speak to me about things. My dad was a machinist, my mom worked for a tool company. So my husband handles the car, and I handle the house — divide and conquer. It's so frustrating when people assume I don't know anything about repairs or tools. I'm just glad my husband is very supportive and knows I am capable of doing things.
Katherine Boag 4 years ago
Uggghhhhh wifi only, disgusting. Wifi in our house is crappy and cuts out randomly. Would plug my ph into the router if i could.
#34
I was buying a new sports car. My husband and I walk into the dealership and the sales guy walks up holding his hand out to shake my husband's hand and asks how he can help. Fine. No biggie. My husband says "she's buying, not me". Sales guy glances at me and says to my husband "Well, it's not just her decision, right?". We left and I bought my new sports car elsewhere. Friggin Jerk.
Carrie Laughs 4 years ago
Find a lot of these just not my personal experience. Bought a sports car and the dealer spoke to me, knew it was for me. Husband was there to just share my enjoyment and none of the questions that required decisions went to him. Purchased a number of cars, new and second hand, and only had one think it was my partner and then when they knew it was me they talked to me.
#35
I don't have a husband, but my dad used to take me shopping for big purchases, like a car or my first computer. And I have to say? This didn't happen very often. The only time I got this was when I was shopping alone for fishing lures at Dick's Sporting Goods. Now, I don't condemn the store as a whole - I've shopped there many times and this is the only time someone was a dick. The clerk (older guy) saw me shopping, came over, and assumed I was shopping for someone else, and kept using "he" pronouns for this assumed person. I've been fishing since I was old enough to hold the pole. With my country cousins, we'd dig our own bait and make our own poles. I've dove for clams for supper for my family when I was 13 years old. Yet this dude kept probing, "Who are you buying for? What kind of fishing does HE do?" I stayed polite bc my mom always said "Kill them with kindness," and let the idiot help me bc I relaly did have questions about what kind of lure is best for catching trout down the bayou. Then I told a manager how uncomfortable this employee made me, and the manager immediately believed me and said he's speak to the employee after I left the store. I have faith that the manager did. I mean, I was gonna let it go, but I was waiting in line to check out and the manger was right there, and I thought, ykno, this clerk is prolly doing this for every woman in the fishing dpt, so I felt obligated to stick up for all of us.
#36
My wife and I are both physicians. She is very type-A and particular. I am much more relaxed and I go with the flow. We recently had a new home built and since then have done a lot in regards to landscaping and adding to the home (finishing the basement, adding on a stand by generator). The thing is, despite my wife usually being the one to reach out to contractors, and despite the fact that she is the one who wants things done in a specific way, and despite the fact that I usually refer them to her, they always try to contact me first, talk primarily to me when we are both present, and reach out to me when they have questions or need to let us know things. It is bizarre. Like, "I am the dude in pajama pants and a sweatshirt playing the floor is lava with the kids. Does it look like I care what kind of finish is on the cabinets. Talk to the wife. We all know she is in charge."
#37
Bought the wife flying lessons for her birthday. Turn up at the centre and the guy talks to me. I politely inform him that my better half will be the one flying. He continues to talk to me, and gets to the point where she needs to sign a contract. He tells me that I need to get her to sign this.... weird Happens the other way too. We were looking at a kitchen showroom. The lady taking us round spoke to me about the finances and the wife about the features of the 5 burner range cooker. Little did she know I'm the cook, the wife is the bank.
#38
We took my daughter to urgent care for stitches. My husband is holding her, and I check her in at the front desk iPad. The front desk man looks at my husband and asks for the insurance card. We’re on my insurance, so I hand him the card. Next, he tells my husband the copay — looking at him behind me — when I’m the one standing at the damn desk. I pull out my card, with my name on it, and pay. Jerk.
Maria Schneider 4 years ago
Some years ago I owned a Triumph three cylinder motorcyle. It started to run unround... I'm damn good with mechanics and it only took me some minutes to find out that the spark plug of the middle cylinder was the problem. Soon after I had a checkup with the motorcyle at the dealer (needed for the guarantee), so I told the mechanic to replace the middle sparc plug. When I came to take the bike back, he (quite a very nice guy) told me that he didn't believe me and checked about everything to find the problem - finally realizing that I had been right. Didn't charge anything for the lesson 😃...
#39
So this one doesn't really involve any women but a coworker of mine, Indian contractor, had a high pitched voice when speaking english. He was on the phone with his insurance to ask why they hadn't made the payment to the garage fixing his car and you could tell he was getting angrier and angrier at them when I all of a sudden heard him yell "I AM THE HUSBAND!". Apparently the guy on the other line though it was a good move to tell my coworker "Can we talk with your husband about this? you don't seem to understand what we're saying". Our female coworkers were livid when they heard that and had a whole bunch of similar stories.
#40
This doesn’t just apply to heterosexual couples, my wife and I are lesbian, I am taller and most sales people direct the discussion to me. I am not the one that makes most of the decisions!!! I’m just taller!!!
#41
I’m a 6’7, 18 stone, bushy bearded vegetarian My girlfriend is a dainty 5’5 meat lover Never once in our almost 4 years has our favourite bar failed to give me her 20 chicken wings and her my 10 veggie nuggets
A. HAM 4 years ago
Same here. I’m a petite steak and potatoes girl, and my burly husband likes salads. They put his salad in front of me EVERY. DAMN. TIME.
Zenozenobee 4 years ago
My man is all about fish ans I'm all about méat. I'm 8cm shorter than him if size matters. I always end up with the fish in front of me. Always.
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Ren Karlej 4 years ago
I usually find they remember who ordered - or double check before putting the plates down.
Mangelo Il Fumatori 4 years ago (edited)
I don't understand why this is their favorite bar if they keep mixing up the orders after all this time.
Lily Mae Kitty 4 years ago
my husband loves dinner salads and they always try to give them to me.
Jade Lynn - Panda's Brat 4 years ago
If they mess up that many times in a row, for years, why would that still be your favourite bar?
#42
I'm a female Marine Corps veteran. I have 'Marine Veteran' license plates on my car. When I got a speeding ticket a few years ago, I showed the highway patrolman my registration and USAA insurance. He was surprised and said, 'Oh, the car is registered to you?!
Giovanni Omanand 4 years ago
im hiding a bad comment that dosn't have enough downvotes, so downvote the comment im hiding
Barbara Taylor-Colbert 4 years ago
The comment you just made proves the point of the stories
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My parents were looking to get solar panels and invited several people over for quotes. This one salesperson kept looking only at my dad, responding only to his questions and not my mom's, and only addressed my dad with the quote. My mom stood her ground and said that even if his offer was the lowest, they would not be choosing him. My mom is very anti-confrontational, so I was really proud of her. Another time, I was helping my mom book plane tickets online for both my parents. Even though she filled her name in first, the online system suggested that my dad would be the 'main booker'. My mom booked her tickets elsewhere.
cybermerlin2000 4 years ago
I've never seen that on online ticket sites. My fiancée always books for us and has never had the main booker be a Mr just The Cardholder
Julie Daly 4 years ago
I booked travel insurance for myself and my husband. I was the main party and it was paid through my individual bank account. The policy arrived with my Husband's name as the lead party. I sent them a scalding email and they apologized and rectified the situation. My husband didn't even know he had travel insurance, that's how involved he was in the process.
#44
Kind of a swircheroo, but I (a woman) sold cars, and a couple came in to buy an Accord. They made it clear it was the wife’s car, so I was asking her the questions and getting to know her, but the husband was a controlling bulldozer of a person. He’d interrupt her and talk down to her, and kept trying to bully me on the finances, which I had no control over. He hated it, but I ignored him sooo politely and patiently, waiting for him to shut the hell up so I could listen to her answer. I eventually stopped him and asked her, this is YOUR car, what do YOU think? He got up and left in a huff to harass the management, and I was left alone to do the deal in peace with her, and it was VERY pleasant without him! I moved on to work as a victim’s advocate for domestic violence; looking back I’m sure this was an abusive relationship, but I’m glad I could offer her the kindness and respect she clearly didn’t get, and although it was for a short time, it was for something big and important. I think about them sometimes (because I got along with her so well, and really disliked him), hoping she’d driven that Accord far away from him.
#45
Went with my then GF when she was car shopping. I drove us there cause she didn't have a car at the time but was more than capable of affording one. We get there, she introduces herself to the dealer that came out and he starts showing us cars. He starts showing her cars and then would address me when talking about the vehicle. Like what kind of engine it has, mileage, ect. She would ask a question the guy would address the answer to me. I was pretty annoyed as I'm not mechanically inclined at all. I said "Why are you talking to me!" dealer stopped and looked confused. "She is the one buying the car not me. Just so you know she is a certified diesel mechanic, she knows way more about cars than I do. Address her not me, I'm just the ride." He stopped and then quietly talked to the gf the rest of the time. She ended up getting a jeep sahara.
Thomas Turnbull 4 years ago
Relationship sadly did not last unless of course you married her and that’s why she was your then girlfriend.
#46
Took my boyfriend to a very expensive birthday dinner in DC and made sure he got the best wine that night. The total came to about $400 just for the two of us. I made the initial reservation so our notes stated that I would be treating. Having come from working at a high end restaurant, I’m familiar with proper service steps. The first strike was when I ordered the wine for us and the server gave the bottle to my boyfriend to approve and taste without giving me the option. Second strike was although I clearly said I was treating, they placed the check in front of my boyfriend...on his birthday. Finally straw was the manager coming over to introduce himself to my boyfriend. Handshake, banter, the works, without acknowledging me. Happened a second time at the end of the meal. Two manager visits. And I was the one trying to provide the experience and bankroll the night. They definitely heard about it.
#47
Any time I’ve bought a vehicle, or gotten parts from a parts counter. Plot twist: when they ask where my husband is, sweetie, I call over my 6’ tall wife (who is a dead ringer for Brienne of Tarth) to assist. Shuts them up real nice.
Remi Flynne 4 years ago
My local garage is owned and run by two women mechanics anyway. Never seem to have a problem no matter if it is me or my husband getting a vehicle fixed.
#48
I'm the husband, but when we have any kind of work done on our house everyone constantly tries to make eye contact with me and pal around. My wife does all of that stuff. I don't know anything about any of it. I literally spend the whole time redirecting people to deal with her. Sometimes I just excuse myself and have her fill me in on details (which I don't care about or need to know) later.
#49
I Was invited to a weekend away with a supplier to launch their new range. My husband went with and on the 'order day' the Financial Manager of the supplier came up to my husband and asked him what he thinks about the new range and what he is considering to buy. My husband replied very dryly that he is only the plus 1 and that he must speak to me seeing that I am the one with the chequebook.
#50
Not my story but my wife's. For clarity, I'm autistic and I do not do well with interactions at all, especially if I don't know the person. We had to get our septic tank pumped and when the guy was over, my wife and I both came outside to talk to him. I was mostly following her because my dad's name was on the request and we have similar names. I assumed he would ask for our names so I went out. The septic guy kept telling me things about the tank, where we lived, our toilet habits (the tenant before us flushed a ton of condoms, which I don't use). My wife explained to him that they weren't ours, that we just moved in, etc. I listened to him but didn't respond a word (just nods and gestures). Still, he kept talking to me about how to maintain the tank and I'm not technical. I have no clue what he's saying. My wife kept answering because she had more experience than me at the topic. Eventually, she stepped between him and me and fielded his comments a lot more firmly. It was weird. She was friendly and understood what he was talking about. I was withdrawn and distracted. I guess he was as bad at picking up on social cues as me.
Chris Jones 4 years ago
What? Don't get the point of the conversation. I have had septic tanks emptied and they have never wanted to discuss 'toilet habits'. They arrive, do the job without studying the contents (how anyway... big pipe gets used and no one is looking at what goes in the tanker), and go away again. Maybe we do it differently where I am.
Linus Nilsson 4 years ago
Could be that the overflow-pipes gets clogged up. Or, if they use the waste as fertilizer, they don't want any plastic in it
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#51
I'll give you one second-hand from my wife. She was buying a car (before I'd met her) and went into the local dealership. The sales person was all about "Maybe you should bring your husband in so we can talk about this, honey". She looked him straight in the eye and said she was happily single, that she'd already talked to a salesperson at another dealership who treated her like an adult, and that he'd be getting her business...and walked out.
#52
I'm not married, so when I make large decisions about my house (that I own and paid for) I ask my father to come along as an advisor. (I'm not young, so the female + age = stupidity assumption shouldn't be there.) Last year I was replacing all the windows (house was built in 1935) and I made appointments with three different companies. (National, local, hardware store chain.) The guy from the national company only focused on my father who repeatedly told him "She's buying the windows, she's done the research." (Which was true.) When we sat down at the dining room table to crunch the numbers the guy would only let my dad see the laptop screen. Finally, my dad said, "Can I see that? I don't have my glasses." The guy gave him the laptop and my dad handed it to me. The second, local company sent a woman rep and there was absolutely no problem at all once I told her it was my house. The third sent out another man, but he was younger than the first guy (and me) so once I told him my house, my money, he also focused on me.
#53
Buying furniture at Ashley Home Store. The (male) sales rep completely ignored me and only asked my husband questions about his preferences, budget, etc. Like I was nonexistent. The furniture was poor quality anyway so we ended up going to another store and buying from this really kooky lady who was asking us all sorts of questions about us as a couple, our zodiac signs, etc. but was super fun, and we got much nicer pieces.
Kisses4Katie 4 years ago
Ooh! I want a kooky saleslady to sell me a funky couch that matches my Leo energy!
Meggie Li 4 years ago
When someone says Leo, I think of Leo Valdez from Heroes of Olympus ( Sequel to Percy Jackson)
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#54
I’m a pilot and decided to take my boyfriend up on a flight for the first time to a touristy town for a cute little day excursion. Everything went super smoothly, except when we were walking to the airplane to fly back afterwards: one of the ramp employees saw us and immediately approached my boyfriend. I was far enough away that I couldn’t hear what was being said, but it looked important so I went up to them just as my guy was awkwardly motioning to me like “She’s the pilot, tell her, not me!” Aviation is still pretty male dominated so I’ve heard stories of something similar happening to other female pilots (it happens a LOT), but it was the first time it’s ever happened to me personally. Needless to say he and I were cracking up the whole flight back!
#55
During my architecture internship, we had this couple client that wanted to do some renovation. The paymaster was the wife but my senior at that time kept referring to the husband about everything until one day the wife snapped because the husband changed her design and telling my senior that it was from her. He was trying to pocket some of the money for himself. Lesson learned — always include both side if your client is a couple.
#56
I'm building a skoolie and occasionally hire friends to help out for the day when they're in need of work. Every single time I go to the hardware store with these friends (all the hired hands have been men so far), the workers address them instead of me when I'm obviously the one actually looking at the products. One such worker continued to address my friend, even though I was answering all the questions he asked. After three attempts to get this misogynistic old man to acknowledge me in the conversation, my friend started laughing and walked away. I continued to stand there, cheerfully answering the questions he barked at my friend, who was actively walking away. I was so entertained at this point; this was war. When my friend was left the aisle, it was like a flip switched in the worker's head. When he was speaking to my friend, he was asking about floor plans and fridges and all the little things that make it a home, but the moment he started talking to ME, he started absolutely questioning my engine, the capacity of my battery bank, and all the things I'm sure he assumed I wouldn't be familiar with. I answered all the questions with ease and even had the chance to mansplain my electrical system, as the worker said something blatantly wrong while speaking with me. The moment he realized I was explaining something to him, he turned beet red, insisted he knew what I was talking about and that I was wrong, and cited his uncle's business as reason to believe he knew what he was talking about. I smiled, suggested he attend some local community college courses to refresh his memory, and wished him a nice day before walking away. It was a beautiful moment. The worker avoided me every time I went to that hardware store for months until I stopped seeing him altogether.
Evil Little Thing 4 years ago
A skoolie is a school bus renovated into a mobile home or camper.
Petar Lazic 4 years ago
This reminds me of when i used to tutor in University. I hated tutoring other men, especially the older ones. They couldn't bear to have a scruffy young guy tell them anything, some even tried to teach me what they had come in to learn.
#57
This is more about my mother than me, but still a good story. We went into the Mercedes dealership. She was looking at a little sports car and wanted to test drive it. The salesman told us that we would have to bring back my father for them to consider us. Now my mother was a corporate lawyer for Exxon and has her own money. She looked at him and said sure we’ll be back. Later, after we had purchased the car at another dealership, drove back by in the car and kindly informed the man to not underestimate women. *edit to say she has called this her pretty woman moment for like 10 years.
#58
Multiple times I’ve had this happen...shopping for hunting knives with my brother, I was at the counter. The guy stood in front of me and spoke to my brother who was 10 ft behind me and on his phone. We walked out. Multiple gun shops I’ve been looking at pistols and the salesmen have either ignore me to speak to whichever man I was with (brother, dad, husband, whoever) and some even have the nerve to say, “she’ll like this one best.” To the men. I hate most when they recommend the pink pistols because it’s pretty and I need a pretty pistol. I hate pink.
cybermerlin2000 4 years ago
This goes back to when I proposed to my fiancée. I bought her a ring that she absolutely adores and as a sort of thank you, she bought me an air rifle (1.77) with scope. She did all the talking, and he listened to her and asked me what ever questions were relevant to me. The guy looked at her, then me and just when we thought he was going to say something sexist said "Are you sure he can be trusted?" She showed him the ring and explained that it was an engagement gift because "Rings don't suit him" We refer to it as a pop gun engagement
Aroace tiger 4 years ago
The bit that annoyed me is the pink gun. Is he TRYING to make his sexism obvious???
Samantha Lomb 4 years ago
Sounds really tempting to test that knife/ pistol on the sales person. And pink guns are super tacky
#59
Maybe not quite what you're looking for but my mom told me when she and my dad were first married and buying furniture for their new home, the furniture store wouldn't accept a check without her husband present, or with a signed note from him authorizing the purchase. In the 1980s. In America. Needless to say they got their furniture from somewhere else.
Caroline Nagel 4 years ago
In Belgium until the 1970's married women had to get permission from their husbands to have a job or a bank account of their own, and were fired as soon as they married. Unmarried mothers had to adopt their own child.
#60
Every damn time I take my truck in for something they call my husband or my father to discuss my truck even when I express to call me it’s mine I’m not an idiot and it’s in my name.
#61
I was in the market for a new car. I'd done my research and knew exactly what I wanted down to the color. I also knew how much I was willing to pay. The only question left to answer was how much I'd get for my trade-in. I walked into a car dealership near my work. A salesman approached me. I told him I wanted to by this car with these options in this color and then asked, "I need to know how much you'll give me for my trade-in." He immediately responds, "Don't waste my time if you're not serious." I walked out and that evening I went to the a dealer near my house. I walked out two hours later with my new car. You can bet I called the first dealership the next day and spoke to the manager.
cybermerlin2000 4 years ago
Sounds more like he was going to try and lowball you on your old car
#62
When I was buying my house, I took my boyfriend with me to the viewing. The realtor mostly talked to him and even ended up calling him with bids on a house. Yes, the house I purchased all on my own and is mine. I don't take myself too seriously, and I'm not easy to upset or embarrass, so I didn't really care, I was riding high on a wave of winning a bidding war.
#63
I had been looking at a car online for about a month. I really wanted it. It was 350 miles away but near where 2 of my kids lived. We drove up to look at the car. Salesmen kept talking to my husband. Finally he says "Look I HATE this car. I'm here to pay cash money on it but only if she's happy with the deal. I personally hope she doesnt get it." THEN they started negotiating with me. Got it for a good price and when the title arrived it bore out the cliche - it really did belong to a little old man who rarely drove it: had the death certificate stapled to it. It was an 8 year old car with less than 40k on it. And I got it for $4k - this was 16 years ago. Now WHY a little old man had a purple car with a sunroof, idk.
#64
This comment just made me understand that my father has done that forever and I just never saw it lmao. My mother is a strong woman, head of 12k employees and who have worked from the bottom to the top and deserve all the money she has made. My father has the same steady job and he is happy with it but it doesnt bring the same money understandably. Because of this we are in good shape financially so we can afford expensive stuff but everytimes we go in high end restaurants, they always talk to my father about paying the bill or they call my father for the delivery of the latest purchase or whatever but I have just understood with this thread that my father all along has always said the same things: I am not the one paying, I dont know why you are talking to me. For years, I thought he was looking like a dumb ass on purpose because he found the situation awkward or he was bragging or joking I dont know but all along he was just saying: the woman makes the money in this couple, talk to the woman not me because I cant afford this stuff. he was just broing his wife all along.
#65
Buying a car. If anyone actually approached me I got to do a few test drives, then once I got to the negotiation stage they would ask me to take the offer home to my husband. I was single. If they didn’t suggest taking it home to my husband, they’d then send me to the financing office - because how could a single woman possibly buy a brand new vehicle in cash. I finally found a great salesman who didn’t pull this sexist stuff on me and I bought a vehicle same day.
#66
All the time, every time we go out, to eat or shop. Restaurants, car dealerships, stores. Even when the items are obviously mine - like the shoes I bought today, the salesman went to the counter and stood around waiting for my husband, who was at the back of the store, to ring the items up, while I’m standing right in front of him. I had to tell him that I’m paying for my own damn shoes! And even when I pay they hand the card or change and receipt to my husband who just stares at them with exasperation while he hands it over to me.
Kari Panda 4 years ago
I honestly never had it happen in my life that I pay and my husband gets handed the change/card.
#67
I was buying a car and my ex was with me. I made it clear it was my car that I was buying myself at every dealership i visited. Most sales people I talked to were perfectly nice, except a guy at the Ford dealership. Every time I asked a question he would answer it to my ex instead of to me, the person who asked it and is the actual customer. He even gave my ex the keys to test drive. Needless to say I do not own a Ford now.
#68
The bank was reporting the mortgage on my husband's credit rating even though the mortgage is in both of our names and we pay it 50/50. The manager was NOT impressed when I asked him why and that it needed to be fixed. He acted like it was impossible but sure enough the next year when I checked my credit report, there it was! So damn frustrating that we still have to fight for equality when it comes to the financial industry.
#69
Two or three times this has happened. Im a butch women and sometimes get mistaken for a dude. If I’m in a group with my female friends and a dude were comes up and ask us for directions or something, they will almost certainly address me and not the rest of the group which I find really interesting.
#70
Not me, but a couple of my former partners. My previous partner (who does Let's Plays on YT and streams) and I went into a fairly popular game store in British Columbia. She was there to pick up some games and equipment, probably 3-400 dollars worth. The sales associate came up to us and just started talking to me, asking me what I needed and completely ignored her. I said we were there for her and he talked to her like she didn't know anything. Before she could even say what she was there for he was like, "Oh you want Animal Crossing or something?". Yeah, we left and went to the other shop in town and they got her business. Pro-Tip, when approaching a couple/group ask, "How can I help you BOTH/ALL today?" don't focus on one customer. My current partner had this happen when we went to a comic book store together here in Ottawa. She isn't super familiar with comics but wanted to buy some art books and maybe a figure with some comics, but had some questions. Anyways, this French-Canadian dude walks up to us and rudely was asking me if he could help me find anything. So I know this shop and my way around, been there a few times and I had my comics in my hands. I told him, "No I'm fine but my partner could use a hand". So she is trying to explain what she's looking for in English, and it's not her first language so it was hard. He didn't acknowledge anything she was saying (I mean I understood "I'm looking for books with artwork in it? Not a comic but...a hard book?". Anyways, she switched to French to try and explain to him, and apparently he just said, "I don't have time for this" in French and walked behind the counter to look at their cards. So again we left and never went back. Do places just not understand customer service and how much money these employees are making the owner miss out? Don't know if you've seen the price of figures and art books, but they aren't cheap.
#71
I made an appointment for taxes and communicated in advance of that appointment. I was a new 1099 worker and had a lot of questions. Every time I asked one, the accountant addressed my husband. My husband has always worked a W-2 job, had very few questions, and does not take care of our finances. All of the paperwork was under his name, and the accountant only addressed him in e-mails. Screw that guy.
Barbara Taylor-Colbert 4 years ago
1099=Self employed or contractor, no taxes taken out. W-2 taxes taken out
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#72
Went into Home Depot to buy a hard hat for my mother... seemed simple enough. Was approached by a worker who seemed to be in his 50s. He took one look up and down and said “what’s a pretty thing like you doing here? You look a little lost” I told him what I was looking for and that I had found it, and then he continued to question what I needed it for, and if I really knew which one to pick out.... it was quite the experience. Thankfully only a one time event though.
#73
I have issues constantly when going out to eat with my boyfriend. They always put the bill down directly in front of him no matter what. Even when I reach across the table to grab it and put my card in, they almost always put the check back down in front of him after swiping the card. They will often turn to him and thank him or tell him to have a great evening or which copy to sign. It’s infuriating.
#74
Every time I pay for a meal, the server puts the bill in front of my guy & returns my card to my guy after I’ve paid for it lol
Mandy Delaforce (PC Girl) 4 years ago
I've never ever been to a restaurant where they take my card away.
#75
While buying a car, my dad went with me as my ride and just to make sure I didn't get ripped off. He stayed pretty quiet throughout it all, meanwhile I'd ask my list of questions... except every time I asked a question, the salesman would turn to my dad and answer it as if my dad had asked it. Eye contact with him and all. It made both myself and my dad really uncomfortable. I ended up confronting him about it and he just awkwardly looked at his feet and dodged the question about his behavior, only to ask my dad if he had any further questions and then walking away. Needless to say, we purchased elsewhere.
#76
Not my boyfriend or husband, but I went car shopping with my mom. I brought her only to keep me company. I was looking into upgrading my truck to a newer year. I knew how much my trade in was worth, and knew i wasn't going to take less. The guy tried to low-ball me by about $8,000, and I told him I wasn't going to go that low. He actually looked over at my mom, like she was going to talk sense into me. She looked at him and was like “don’t look at me, this is her deal, I’m just here to hang out.” He walked away, came back, tossed the paper down at me and was like “congrats, you’re getting what you want.” Now most would walk away from that because of the jerk move. Nope. I took it, because I knew it made him so grumpy that he wasn’t able to pull one over on me.
#77
My stupid boyfriend at the time left the lights on in my car for a whole weekend, so it was super dead. I bought a new battery and changed it out but there was a mechanism that prevented the car from being turned on after the battery has been changed (06 civic.... still don’t know why that was a thing). Anyhow, I was still locked out of my car so I called a locksmith. I asked my bf to go to the parking lot of our apartment with me because he was a stranger and I wanted to be safe. I explained I changed the battery but still couldn’t start my car. First of all, the locksmith wouldn’t look at me or ask me any questions even though I called it in and was giving him all my info (it was MY car). My boyfriend at the time was dumb as a box of rocks and could only tell him my car was blue and had four doors. I explained again that I changed the battery and he couldn’t understand why it wouldn’t work. He starts messing with me key fob and I say no, the battery in my car, not the key. He drops what he’s doing and says “oh no, you shouldn’t have done that. Why would you touch that? You should have told me you touched your battery”. Why the hell shouldn’t I touch my own car battery? And maybe he would have understood if he listened to me the first 6 times I told him I changed the battery. Long story short, he did nothing and charged me $100 (even though it was my bfs fault, and he still didn’t pay me back), so I had to have it towed to a mechanic who fixed the problem in 5 minutes.
#78
Back when I was married, I was the financial manager in our marriage. Not that I particularly wanted that role all by myself—I would have preferred to be a team—but I was on my way to learning that my husband would simply not engage in subjects that made him feel uncomfortable. Since he wouldn’t deal with looking at cash flow or budgets, thinking about housing costs, retirement, or college savings, even when I tried to make it a joint effort, I handled it all myself. And every time I initiated a move, like refinancing our house or opening an investment account, his name would be listed first, and mine second. Didn’t matter that I was the one who exclusively worked with the broker or whatever. I thought it was sexist nonsense. He thought it was funny. Fast forward to the first tax year after our divorce. We divided our assets but retained one joint investment account specifically to fund college for our kids. We had not addressed the issue of paying taxes on this account in our divorce decree. When tax time came around, I was at my tax accountant’s office with all my financial paperwork, including this account. She said, “You could pay the taxes on this account and ask him for half. Or you could leave it up to him. The IRS only gets the social security number of the first person on the account, so he’s the one one the hook for the taxes.” I said, “I won’t be paying them, then.” He was furious. Too bad, so sad.
Joyce Melton 4 years ago
My dad and my uncles were mechanics and my father taught me to help him when he worked on cars. When I started driving, he taught me to do regular maintenance and small repair jobs like replacing the starter. As an adult, I worked as an inventory clerk for a tractor company, and for a time as parts manager at an auto dealer. Later, I lived with a guy who had a transmission shop and I did the ordering and helped with rebuilds. Years later, I was working as a computer programmer. Leaving work one day, I started up my old junker and went to put it in gear. I put in the clutch, pulled the shift lever, there was a clunk sound, the shift lever hung up at 2nd gear and would not move. I could start it in 2nd and drove it to a garage. After telling the manager and two mechanics that I had a broken shift linkage, they worked on the car for five minutes, doing several checks before discovering they could not get out of 2nd. Then they came and informed me that I had a broken shift linkage.
#79
Car lot, of course. Kept talking to my boyfriend. Told the salesman, "Fine, keep trying to sell a car to the guy with bad credit. I'm going elsewhere." Good boyfriend though. Next lot, the guy greeted him first, my bf told him, I'm gonna do you a favor and go outside before you lose your sale." I drive a hard bargain. Got the car for its exact value, financed it and still didn't need gap insurance. They offered me a job, but I can't deal that way to a buyer.
#80
Not a woman, but I know my wife and I experience this all the time. We have noticed so many times that when we go to a store, my wife will be the one paying, but the cashier still hands the receipt to me. It's particularly frustrating because if my wife is paying, that means I am with the kids. So why they think to hand me the receipt is beyond me. The only non-sexist explanation I have is that I am taller than my wife (and can thereby reach it easier than her). But that doesn't describe every scenario adequately.
#81
Needed a new car and went by myself to check some places out. Was patently ignored despite being seen by more than one salesman. Had to take my husband with me, whom they did talk to. I took auto mechanics for 2 years, my husband knows nothing.
#82
My wife and I in Dubai, being the middle East they would exclusively approach me but the credit card was hers. Every dam time
What do you think ?
A. HAM 4 years ago
The fact that there are so many examples of this, is mortifying. Here’s my story: I moved to a new state and wanted to purchase a home. My old state let me purchase homes all by myself, even though I was married. (In fact, I purchased three.) My new state wouldn’t let me, even though I was paying cash, and the funds were 100% from my personal bank account. My new state not only required my husband’s name be on all the paperwork, but he was listed as the buyer, and I was listed as “spouse”. IT WAS 100% MY FREAKING MONEY, NOT HIS! I’m surprised my new state lets me vote.
Lili 4 years ago
You can actually sue the state for this. Surprising they've never been sued before (or have they?), where are all the rich ladies there?
Load More Replies...
Heather Williams 4 years ago
I am a happily single woman. And I still get asked if my husband approves of me buying things or handling finances or such things or get spam letters addressed to Mr [my surname]. Wherever this mystery husband is that I supposedly have I would love to meet him.
Angie Chan 4 years ago
I am in the same boat. Solicitors stop by the house and ask to speak to my husband...then boyfriend. I will give credit to one salesman who recognized his precarious position, then asked for my girlfriend. That one got a laugh out of me.
Load More Replies...
MRSS 4 years ago
So I am the only One that works in my Parts Department where I work. I manage it and deal with the Tech's in the shop and the woman who runs service. I do in fact work for Ford by the way. When a customer call's or comes in they ask for Parts and I either pick up the phone or walk to the counter to help them out. They take one look at me and then look around past me to see if someone else is in my department or ask over the phone if they have Parts. Can I help you? Is all I say, and the response every single time is: Is there a Man or a Tech that can help me. No Sir, I run Parts and have been doing so for 20yrs. It's either this woman you are looking past or you get no parts.
Aunt Messy 4 years ago
Something like this happened years ago when I worked at a lumberyard. A guy showed up and told me to "get one of the guys" to load his truck. HIs purchase was already tied down on a pallet, so I went to get the forklift and he stopped me and told me to "get one of the guys". My manager walked up and the guy started babbling at him about loading, so my manager turned to me and said, "What are you waiting for? Load the truck? This guy is full of s**t."
Load More Replies... Caroline Nagel 4 years ago
I once got berated by a plumber that the window in my bathroom in the appartment I rented was in the wrong place. I still wonder what I could have done about it.
Remi Flynne 4 years ago
Weird. Never come across a plumber that worried about windows. Just tell them it's rented and not your responsibility.
Load More Replies...
Rachel Adams 4 years ago
I once got told by a man that, as a girl (i'm 47!) i only liked Doctor Who because i must fancy David Tennant and thats the only reason girls watched it. I pointed out that i was probably watching Doctor Who before he was born and my favourite was actually Tom Baker
Miss Milinky 4 years ago
My Partner and I have very different tastes when it comes to food/drink. I like meaty steaks, an Old Fashioned or a pint of lager in the pub. He's a veggie burger/poached fish kinda guy and likes any cocktail that looks more like a chocolate milkshake. He likes a sticky sweet pudding. I like a cheese board. It's incredible how often our orders get delivered the wrong way around!
Ren Karlej 4 years ago
Not had any of this... if I'm the one buying they talk to me. Regardless of the product. The only time I have ever experienced anything remotely like this was in a town in France in 2005 when we were given the 'ladies' menus that come without the prices. Only the men had menus where they could see the costs. We hadn't seen that before so asked why and the staff were very friendly and explained to us.
Serbob 4 years ago
I see it all the time. We had a staff Xmas lunch at a restaurant. About a dozen people. I was head of the committee and had the cash. The whole time the waitress flirted (yes, flirted!) with the guy at the head or the table and ignored the ladies at the end. Her face totally dropped when she brought the check and I told her to bring it down to me.
tuzdayschild 4 years ago
This does not happen to me. I must have a "don't even think about it" look on my face.
Josy Bannon 4 years ago
Its sad those things still happen! I'm a little on the fence with the comments like: Ha I would have said...or I just would have done this and that..or your husband/boyfriend/+1 should have...because it might make women feel they didnt do enough, should have just been different. Whilst actually those men should have just not been so sexist in the first place. On the other hand I understand those fantasies to speak up, shut them down and so on but why dont we say: the (sexist) man should have said, Oh I am sorry, the car is for you? How can I help you? Or I am so sorry, whilst placing the bill in front of the woman. They SHOULD HAVE treated those women with respect. The women acted perfectly fine.
A. HAM 4 years ago
The fact that there are so many examples of this, is mortifying. Here’s my story: I moved to a new state and wanted to purchase a home. My old state let me purchase homes all by myself, even though I was married. (In fact, I purchased three.) My new state wouldn’t let me, even though I was paying cash, and the funds were 100% from my personal bank account. My new state not only required my husband’s name be on all the paperwork, but he was listed as the buyer, and I was listed as “spouse”. IT WAS 100% MY FREAKING MONEY, NOT HIS! I’m surprised my new state lets me vote.
Lili 4 years ago
You can actually sue the state for this. Surprising they've never been sued before (or have they?), where are all the rich ladies there?
Load More Replies... Heather Williams 4 years ago
I am a happily single woman. And I still get asked if my husband approves of me buying things or handling finances or such things or get spam letters addressed to Mr [my surname]. Wherever this mystery husband is that I supposedly have I would love to meet him.
Angie Chan 4 years ago
I am in the same boat. Solicitors stop by the house and ask to speak to my husband...then boyfriend. I will give credit to one salesman who recognized his precarious position, then asked for my girlfriend. That one got a laugh out of me.
Load More Replies... MRSS 4 years ago
So I am the only One that works in my Parts Department where I work. I manage it and deal with the Tech's in the shop and the woman who runs service. I do in fact work for Ford by the way. When a customer call's or comes in they ask for Parts and I either pick up the phone or walk to the counter to help them out. They take one look at me and then look around past me to see if someone else is in my department or ask over the phone if they have Parts. Can I help you? Is all I say, and the response every single time is: Is there a Man or a Tech that can help me. No Sir, I run Parts and have been doing so for 20yrs. It's either this woman you are looking past or you get no parts.
Aunt Messy 4 years ago
Something like this happened years ago when I worked at a lumberyard. A guy showed up and told me to "get one of the guys" to load his truck. HIs purchase was already tied down on a pallet, so I went to get the forklift and he stopped me and told me to "get one of the guys". My manager walked up and the guy started babbling at him about loading, so my manager turned to me and said, "What are you waiting for? Load the truck? This guy is full of s**t."
Load More Replies... Caroline Nagel 4 years ago
I once got berated by a plumber that the window in my bathroom in the appartment I rented was in the wrong place. I still wonder what I could have done about it.
Remi Flynne 4 years ago
Weird. Never come across a plumber that worried about windows. Just tell them it's rented and not your responsibility.
Load More Replies... Rachel Adams 4 years ago
I once got told by a man that, as a girl (i'm 47!) i only liked Doctor Who because i must fancy David Tennant and thats the only reason girls watched it. I pointed out that i was probably watching Doctor Who before he was born and my favourite was actually Tom Baker
Miss Milinky 4 years ago
My Partner and I have very different tastes when it comes to food/drink. I like meaty steaks, an Old Fashioned or a pint of lager in the pub. He's a veggie burger/poached fish kinda guy and likes any cocktail that looks more like a chocolate milkshake. He likes a sticky sweet pudding. I like a cheese board. It's incredible how often our orders get delivered the wrong way around!
Ren Karlej 4 years ago
Not had any of this... if I'm the one buying they talk to me. Regardless of the product. The only time I have ever experienced anything remotely like this was in a town in France in 2005 when we were given the 'ladies' menus that come without the prices. Only the men had menus where they could see the costs. We hadn't seen that before so asked why and the staff were very friendly and explained to us.
Serbob 4 years ago
I see it all the time. We had a staff Xmas lunch at a restaurant. About a dozen people. I was head of the committee and had the cash. The whole time the waitress flirted (yes, flirted!) with the guy at the head or the table and ignored the ladies at the end. Her face totally dropped when she brought the check and I told her to bring it down to me.
tuzdayschild 4 years ago
This does not happen to me. I must have a "don't even think about it" look on my face.
Josy Bannon 4 years ago
Its sad those things still happen! I'm a little on the fence with the comments like: Ha I would have said...or I just would have done this and that..or your husband/boyfriend/+1 should have...because it might make women feel they didnt do enough, should have just been different. Whilst actually those men should have just not been so sexist in the first place. On the other hand I understand those fantasies to speak up, shut them down and so on but why dont we say: the (sexist) man should have said, Oh I am sorry, the car is for you? How can I help you? Or I am so sorry, whilst placing the bill in front of the woman. They SHOULD HAVE treated those women with respect. The women acted perfectly fine.
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