Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Continue in app Continue in browser

BoredPanda Add post form topAdd Post
Tooltip close

The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here.

Every Single Family Member Takes This Woman’s Side After She Found Out Her Husband Was Cheating With Her Best Friend
218

Every Single Family Member Takes This Woman’s Side After She Found Out Her Husband Was Cheating With Her Best Friend

“Time Froze In That Moment”: Expectant Mom Finds A Message From Her Best Friend On Her Husband’s Phone That Changes Their Lives ForeverEvery Single Family Member Takes This Woman's Side After She Found Out Her Husband Was Cheating With Her Best FriendWoman Is In Complete Shock After She Sees Texts Her Best Friend Left Her Husband, Finds Out He's Not So Loving And Caring After All“Four Months These People Have Been Lying”: Woman Learns Her Husband And Best Friend Are Sleeping Together“You Haven’t Told Her About Us Yet?”: One Message Ruins Many People’s Lives After Woman Finds Out Her Husband Has Been Unfaithful With Her Best FriendCheaters Get Cut Off From Their Own Families After Husband's Affair With His Wife's Best Friend Gets Uncovered“I Will Cut Her Out Of My Life”: Woman Plans To Sever A Relationship After Catching On To Husband’s UnfaithfulnessWoman Shares Her Heartbreaking And Infuriating Experience Of Catching Her Husband Cheating With Her Best FriendCheaters Get Cut Off From Their Own Families After Husband's Affair With His Wife's Best Friend Gets Uncovered
ADVERTISEMENT

Marriage should be an alliance of a lifetime between loving partners who support each other through thick and thin. This sort of rhetoric is echoed in the vows many couples make during their wedding. But humans are unfortunately no strangers to saying one thing and doing another.

A woman shared a heart-wrenching story of betrayal when she learned that her husband of six years had been cheating on her for months with her best friend. When turning off an alarm on her husband’s phone, she saw a text that led her to investigate the lies her partner and friend had been feeding her.

Finding out a long-term partner has not been faithful can flip a person’s whole life upside down

Image credits: drazenphoto (not the actual photo)

A woman discovered her husband of six years was having an affair with her best friend

ADVERTISEMENT

Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)

ADVERTISEMENT

Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)

ADVERTISEMENT

Image credits: Present-Hope4502

OP gave an update of how emotions a bit later and what she planned to do

ADVERTISEMENT

She then detailed the final confrontation

Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual photo)

ADVERTISEMENT

Image credits: Pavel Danilyuk (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Ketut Subiyanto (not the actual photo)

ADVERTISEMENT

Image credits: Present-Hope4502

Cheaters give a number of excuses for why they betrayed another person’s trust

The “simple” explanation for why people cheat boils down to a lack of self-control and wanting more than they have. Lust is a cardinal sin for a reason, but many people might wonder why their long-term partners, who they think they know, give in to baser instincts so easily. The first explanation is that they don’t know them that well. People lie, manipulate and build a false impression of themselves. Digging deeper, there are other, emotional reasons why a person might decide to be unfaithful. This is a notoriously difficult topic to research, as most people aren’t exactly forthcoming with information about their infidelity, much less the reasoning behind it.

The research that has looked into this topic points to a variety of emotions. These include anger, self-esteem, lack of love, low commitment, need for variety, neglect, sexual desire, as well as environmental factors like opportunity and circumstance. Generally, it’s a combination of them, as a desire without opportunity normally tends to not go anywhere. When interviewed, cheaters often justify their actions not due to an attachment for the new partner, but due to feeling a lack of affection in the first relationship. It is important to take these answers with a grain of salt, as the vast majority of people, faithful or not, still see cheating as something bad. Even in anonymous surveys, social desirability bias is still in play. The unfortunate truth is that we constantly want to look better to others than we really are.

Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual photo)

It can be hard to understand why a person would throw away a relationship through dishonesty

This means that in most contentious topics, researchers have to be very careful to pick out real answers and people simply try to make themselves appear better. It’s easier to say that you cheated if you can blame your partner, instead of admitting to a lack of self-control. In a study conducted in the US, only half of the self-reported cheaters actually admitted to having sex with someone other than their partner. On average, women tend to have longer affairs, while men often cite revenge or an opportunity as their primary motivators, meaning they have no desire for a longer relationship. Interestingly, the majority of respondents that confessed did it to spite or hurt their partners, meaning it’s possibly less of a question of coming clean and more of inflicting more pain.

In the end, infidelity is ugly and hurtful in almost all situations. Yes, people have autonomy and consenting adults can make their own decisions, but the beauty of a marriage is that people decide, voluntarily, to give up certain freedoms. A commitment is only special if it costs you something. More often than not, it’s the lies that end up hurting more than the instances of cheating. OP documenting the entire saga is a good example of how to not lose your head in a horrible situation. Fortunately, she had access to legal assistance, family, and the element of surprise. Hopefully, she can make as good a life as she can after this situation, after cutting two manipulative liars out of her life.

Image credits: Ron Lach (not the actual photo)

Readers expressed their sympathy and disgust at the husband and friend

Share on Facebook
Justin Sandberg

Justin Sandberg

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Read more »

I am a writer at Bored Panda. Despite being born in the US, I ended up spending most of my life in Europe, from Latvia, Austria, and Georgia to finally settling in Lithuania. At Bored Panda, you’ll find me covering topics ranging from the cat meme of the day to red flags in the workplace and really anything else. In my free time, I enjoy hiking, beating other people at board games, cooking, good books, and bad films.

Read less »
Justin Sandberg

Justin Sandberg

Writer, BoredPanda staff

I am a writer at Bored Panda. Despite being born in the US, I ended up spending most of my life in Europe, from Latvia, Austria, and Georgia to finally settling in Lithuania. At Bored Panda, you’ll find me covering topics ranging from the cat meme of the day to red flags in the workplace and really anything else. In my free time, I enjoy hiking, beating other people at board games, cooking, good books, and bad films.

Viktorija Ošikaitė

Viktorija Ošikaitė

Author, BoredPanda staff

Read more »

I'm a visual editor here at Bored Panda and I enjoy a good laugh. My work ranges from serious topics related to toxic work environments and relationship difficulties to humorous articles about online shopping fails and introvert memes. When I'm not at my work desk, checking if every single pixel is in the right place, I usually spend my free time playing board games, taking pictures, and watching documentaries

Read less »

Viktorija Ošikaitė

Viktorija Ošikaitė

Author, BoredPanda staff

I'm a visual editor here at Bored Panda and I enjoy a good laugh. My work ranges from serious topics related to toxic work environments and relationship difficulties to humorous articles about online shopping fails and introvert memes. When I'm not at my work desk, checking if every single pixel is in the right place, I usually spend my free time playing board games, taking pictures, and watching documentaries

What do you think ?
Add photo comments
POST
DrBronxx
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Damn. I know this is a horrible situation that OP and her kids are going through, and so many loving people have been hurt by it, but dammit if this isn't the most riveting thing I've ever read on Bored Panda. Gripping.

Woundwort42
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow, it blew up on reddit, the ex best friend seems to have responded AND revealed real names

DrBronxx
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Do you have a link? or a username? I'm scrolling through and can't seem to find it.

Load More Replies...
The Mom
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Food for thought: She didn't see any signs of cheating because he's been doing it the whole time they were together. . I know of a husband that cheated on his wife with her best friend. When wife found out she overdosed. Husband found her, called an ambulance and then died of a heart attack. Wife lived and cut off best friend.

Load More Comments
DrBronxx
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Damn. I know this is a horrible situation that OP and her kids are going through, and so many loving people have been hurt by it, but dammit if this isn't the most riveting thing I've ever read on Bored Panda. Gripping.

Woundwort42
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow, it blew up on reddit, the ex best friend seems to have responded AND revealed real names

DrBronxx
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Do you have a link? or a username? I'm scrolling through and can't seem to find it.

Load More Replies...
The Mom
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Food for thought: She didn't see any signs of cheating because he's been doing it the whole time they were together. . I know of a husband that cheated on his wife with her best friend. When wife found out she overdosed. Husband found her, called an ambulance and then died of a heart attack. Wife lived and cut off best friend.

Load More Comments
You May Like
Related on Bored Panda
Related on Bored Panda
Trending on Bored Panda
Also on Bored Panda