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Birds are a universal part of our ecosystem, from the clueless-looking pidgin to sparrows that zip by at extremely high speeds. The ability to fly equips them to be particularly immune from repercussions, so it’s no surprise that avians seem to have no qualms about taking our stuff, eating our food, and then flying away before any consequences can be felt. 

The “Birds being Jerks” online group gathers examples of birds with little to no regard for humans and our stuff. So get comfortable and upvote your favorite examples as you scroll through. Be sure to comment your own bird stories and tales.

#2

My Dickbag Bird

My Dickbag Bird

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KittyGotClaws
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As long as he doesn't upload them to the Internet while you're downloading.

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When you take into consideration the evolutionary nature of birds, it makes more sense that they might have an inclination towards jerkdom. Scientists believe that birds are the modern incarnation of dinosaurs like the velociraptor of “Jurrasic Park” fame. You might notice the word raptor, which we still use to describe various birds of prey. 

They are still pretty unique in the modern world, as they are the only animals with feathers. The only exception to this is the kiwi, which is furry and flightless, much like the fruit. They also lay eggs, despite being warm-blooded, much to the benefit of our breakfast. One thing modern birds do not really have anymore is teeth, as their ancestors often did still retain some to access a more varied diet.

#5

Crow Rides On The Back Of A Bald Eagle

Crow Rides On The Back Of A Bald Eagle

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malaixa
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ah yes, the crow and the bald eagle - the odd couple of the bird world. It's a classic case of a small bird with big dreams, hitching a ride on the shoulders of a bald eagle, the ultimate symbol of freedom and majesty. I suppose it just goes to show that no matter how different we may seem on the surface, we can all find common ground when we're in it together. Or maybe that crow is just trying to save his energy for the next heist.

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#6

I Think We Have A Criminal Here

I Think We Have A Criminal Here

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Feathers give birds all sorts of benefits, from flight, insulation, and protection against water. The flip side is that it ends up requiring them to spend almost 10% of their time just grooming and preening. Reflecting their dinosaur heritage, some birds also have scales, primarily on their toes. The ability to fly comes with the need for rapid digestion and very quick metabolism. 

#7

This Peacock Pecked At His Own Reflection On A Bmw For Over Half An Hour

This Peacock Pecked At His Own Reflection On A Bmw For Over Half An Hour

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Kobe
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was here first - you little sh*t ! move ! I said, move.. !

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#8

Fuck The Law

Fuck The Law

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KittyGotClaws
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Lol the sign perfectly illustrates a sea gull, right down to its spindly legs!

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#9

No Respect For The Rules

No Respect For The Rules

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malaixa
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, it's no surprise that birds are breaking the rules. After all, they've been flying under the radar for far too long. But shaming them on the internet? Nah... That's just fowl play!

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Some can also mimic the noises of other animals, including humans. Parrots are pretty famous for taking on the mannerisms and expressions used by their owners, while crows can mimic the sounds of predators. They use this to attract said predators to carcasses, allowing wolves or bears to split open the dead animal and gain access to the meat inside. 

#10

I Love Parrots But Don't Insult The Arsonist

I Love Parrots But Don't Insult The Arsonist

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#12

Help I Lost My Lovebird In This Pile Of Mangoes!

Help I Lost My Lovebird In This Pile Of Mangoes!

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Loverboy
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm embarrassed at how long that took me to see. Tbf it's late and I'm tired

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#15

Dick Left Alone With An Open Laptop

Dick Left Alone With An Open Laptop

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KittyGotClaws
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"I want this one, no this one! How about this one over there? Noooo, this one's better! Oooops... Hi hooman!"

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#16

Hes Figured Out How To Open The Seed Dispenser

Hes Figured Out How To Open The Seed Dispenser

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#17

Blursed Parrot

Blursed Parrot

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Feathered Dinosaur
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, duh, haven't you seen all the Jurassic Park movies? We are expected to bite and hunt and stuff...

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#18

Thanks For Rescuing Us From The Brink Of Extinction And All, But

Thanks For Rescuing Us From The Brink Of Extinction And All, But

SeanaLyn , SeanaLyn Report

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David Paterson
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Critically endangered bird Vs human. Needs to be a documentary about this one.

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#19

German Chancellor Angela Merkel At A Bird Park

German Chancellor Angela Merkel At A Bird Park

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David Paterson
Community Member
12 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Rainbow lorikeets! The most commonly seen wild bird in Australia. Very little fear of humans. A wildlife park in Queensland regularly pranks tourists like this. An unforgettable experience. There's a photo of young me in exactly the same situation.

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#20

Poor Baby Hippo Never Hurt A Fly

Poor Baby Hippo Never Hurt A Fly

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#22

This Speaks For Itself

This Speaks For Itself

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#23

This One Has Made My Balcony His Territory... Tries To Scratch Me If I'm Outside

This One Has Made My Balcony His Territory... Tries To Scratch Me If I'm Outside

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Loverboy
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Look at those talons and that beak. That balcony belongs to her now, unless you want serious injury I suggest you surrender it.

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#24

An Atlantic Puffin (Joe) Who Doesn't Like To Share

An Atlantic Puffin (Joe) Who Doesn't Like To Share

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#25

License And Registration... And A Couple Of Those Fries

License And Registration... And A Couple Of Those Fries

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#27

These Birds Getting Plastered Off Fermented Cherries In Our Backyard

These Birds Getting Plastered Off Fermented Cherries In Our Backyard

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KittyGotClaws
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why are there cherries leftover on the tree? You should've baked them into a pie!

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#29

Nope. Sorry Birds Exist. This Asshole Is Proof

Nope. Sorry Birds Exist. This Asshole Is Proof

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#30

This Swan Has Been Enforcing The Stay At Home Order Outside My House For The Last Three Days

This Swan Has Been Enforcing The Stay At Home Order Outside My House For The Last Three Days

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Loverboy
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Swans/geese are douches. I have been attacked by two and they are so f*****g mean

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#32

Asshole Pelicans

Asshole Pelicans

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David Paterson
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They won't eat children, but they have been known to eat pigeons and small mammals. I know a place where the pelicans are regularly fed, daily. They are friendly birds, not aggressive.

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#33

This Asshole And Her Bullshit Crumbs Everywhere

This Asshole And Her Bullshit Crumbs Everywhere

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KittyGotClaws
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't know, I'd be more worried about how she's eyeing me now that her snack it's gone.

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#34

Magpie Kiss

Magpie Kiss

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Bron
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12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Just yesterday, I discovered hubby of 23 years has a scar behind his ear from where a maggie pecked him

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#35

Memphis Hawks Don’t Let You Mess With Their Eggs…

Memphis Hawks Don’t Let You Mess With Their Eggs…

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malaixa
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, it's clear that this Memphis hawk take her egg protection duties very seriously. I guess they don't want anyone else to hatch a plan for those precious supermarket eggs. But let's be honest, this hawk is just winging it when it comes to grocery store etiquette.

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#36

Seagulls Are The Worst

Seagulls Are The Worst

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malaixa
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Seagulls are like the in-laws of the bird world. They swoop in uninvited, make a huge mess, and refuse to leave until they've eaten everything in sight.

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#37

Birds Ate My Handmade Paper Star (Took Me Weeks To Make)

Birds Ate My Handmade Paper Star (Took Me Weeks To Make)

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#39

This Is Comfortable

This Is Comfortable

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Loverboy
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's a nice photo, but it doesn't really belong here. He's a derp, not a d**k.

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#40

This Guy Was Screaming At Me For The Whole 3 Minutes I Was Packing My Scooter. Loud Af. Pretty Badass Looking Imo

This Guy Was Screaming At Me For The Whole 3 Minutes I Was Packing My Scooter. Loud Af. Pretty Badass Looking Imo

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Loverboy
Community Member
12 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That bird will find where you live and call the gang to s**t on all your windows.

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Note: this post originally had 95 images. It’s been shortened to the top 40 images based on user votes.

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