Hey pandas I feel like I need to ask someone, anyone… have you ever felt nervous or guilty for requesting days off work?
Here’s some background context. So I’m prone to getting very bad tonsillitis because my tonsils are just a little more swollen than a normal person's. They don’t hurt it’s just that when it comes to a seasonal weather change I will get sick pretty badly but only from my tonsils. I never can sleep with a fan or ac on because I’m scared to get or if I do I need to make sure stay completely bundled under the covers which usually defeats the purpose of having the fan or ac on. When I do get sick from tonsillitis I never get any other symptoms like the flu, cough, stuffy nose, or fever for example. It’s only my tonsils that get infected no they get so bad that I need to go to the ER to get stronger medication to bring down the already extra swelling from the infection to my already fat tonsils. Plus it always hurts to talk, eat, or even drink water because they are so swollen that they are basically kissing and touching each other.
Anyway, I’ve gotten sick of having to run to the ER because first of all, that’s money I can save for something else in the future or even having to worry about me getting sick from my tonsils. So I recently went to see a specialist to see if I could get my tonsils removed; to live a “normal life”. And that’s when I found out that I have bigger tonsils than normal and that it would be a good idea to get them removed. Here’s where my dilemma is. This year alone I’ve had to miss a few work days because I’ve gotten sick, and since I work in a place where I HAVE to use my voice; I can’t really talk when I have tonsillitis. They’ve never denied my days off at this place of work but when I come back they make me feel like it’s my fault that I got sick. Or they make certain comments that kinda make me feel guilty for not being able to go to work.
Since I’ve gone to the specialist I have a scheduled date for when I will be having my surgery to remove my abnormally engorged tonsils but I feel nervous or even scared to ask for days off because it’s going to be a 2-week healing process. I’m afraid that they will end up firing me because of this or just icing my more out; because it’s been a really weird vibe since I’ve gone back to work the first time I've had to ask for a day off; when I come back if they do approve my requests. I know I have to ask for the days off but I’m already feeling sick just thinking about it. I’m usually not a person who is afraid to say things that are on my mind or speak when I need to but right now I feel guilty and nervous that I need to get this procedure done and ask for 2 weeks off. And I don’t know why or if this should even be a normal feeling. Does anyone have any advice or don’t know some way to build the courage to ask for this time off?
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You feel nervous because our society has pushed the ridiculous idea that work is all that matters. Take your time off, whether or not they approve it. Take care of yourself. Then start looking for a new job. Good luck with everything.
Oh bestie, are you in the US? Very toxic work culture there :( I hope you find a better job in the near future. You have to stand up for yourself and set firm boundaries. Don't make it a request, make it a statement. If they fire you, for God's sake, FIGHT IT. You have grounds for an unfair dismissal lawsuit.
It seemed like, this might be your personality. You're overly responsible and honest person. It is not something bad. However, catching the balance is important not to be burnt out. You also have responsibilities to yourself such as protecting self physical and mental health. You should check your workplace agreement for how many days you're allowed to take day off and when it is necessary, you should give yourself a break.
It seemed like, this might be your personality. You're overly responsible and honest person. It is not something bad. However, catching the balance is important not to be burnt out. You also have responsibilities to yourself such as protecting self physical and mental health. You should check your workplace agreement for how many days you're allowed to take day off and when it is necessary, you should give yourself a break.
