3Kviews
Hey Pandas, What Life Advice Did Your Parents Give You That Would Never Work Today? (Closed)
Whether it’s life advice, finding a job, dating, etc. What advice was given to you that today seems so far-fetched, you can’t believe they even suggested it?
This post may include affiliate links.
"Ignore bullies".
No, mother of mine, that didn't work then, and it works even less now they can torment you via internet....
My dad used to tell me to take my pay check, bank 1/2 of it right away and don’t touch it, pay bills with the rest. Whatever is left is your play money until you get paid again. I really don’t know how much $50 for 2 weeks gets me.
Oh how I miss a world where the rent bill wasn't one entire paycheck.
“Just ignore them, they’ll get bored and stop teasing you.”
Or
“He’s teasing (verbal bullying that eventually turned physical) you because he has a crush on you!”
I have heard both of these more times than I can count. Neither of them work, and the second one is a really bad thing to tell kids.
In 2014, I got laid off and told my mother. She said, "Time to get out the yellow pages." Honestly, I needed that laugh. I told her, "That isn't how it works anymore."
My parents still get the yellow pages delivered. When i visit with my kids I use the books to make hot wheels ramps. They're perfect, being both heavy and flexible
You should get a job with Ma Bell installing phones. People are always going to need phones.
If a girl is mean to you that's because she likes you.
If someone is mean to you that's because they are scared.
if a girl is mean to you, it is usually because one day they decided to be a lil' bish and now they have to keep it up because they just don't care enough to apologise. as a girl myself, i can tell you that we can be real a-holes when we feel like it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
My father used to advise me, when stopped by a cop, exit your car and meet him closer to his car. Claimed it made the cop more comfortable on his own territory.
Of course, these days it would get you shot, no matter what color you are!
My dad used to tell me to invest in retirement policies. He's now living in a run-down house, is tight for money, and will die lower-middleclass. He never changed job or got a promotion. Just plugged along at the same thing for 40+ years, collected his retirement, and now sits reading the newspaper. I mean, what a pointless life. It makes me sad. He's not sad, which is OK, I suppose. But I guess I expect more out of life than working 40 years to just be able to sit in a chair and do crosswords.
My mom let my sisters live in her house rent free after they were 18 and they had literally no idea how to be an adult. This might work for others but my sisters hated not knowing what to do so bad they told me if I need to I may live with them when I turn 18 but have to pay a small portion of rent and bills to get me used to paying bills and stuff when I am ready to live on my own. My sisters have no resentment with my mom they just wish they had learned how to adult before needing to adult.
How I understand your sisters. Your mum probably meant to be kind, but forgot that kindness also means "bringing up".
You must have 6 full months of bills set aside
Kids can’t have anxiety, just relax and you’ll feel much better. Wow yeah if it was as simple as just relaxing I wouldn’t be anxious anyway. The same person also said ADHD isn’t real.
I'm so sorry. Anxiety is very much real for kids and it's great that the people who say it isn't don't have it obviously. ADHD is also very much real. My best friend has it and we can both tell the difference of when it's worse and better vs when she takes her meds
GenX here. My parents told me to get a well-rounded college degree, because employers want educated employees and they'd train me for the specific job. Maybe this worked in the '60s, but it sure didn't work in the '80s. My first full-time job after college was "office manager" (aka secretary/receptionist). What I ended up doing until I got hurt on the job was manual physical labor (mail handler for the USPS). With my college degree.
This is recent but: tell the teacher that you have adhd.
Like, my dumba** (cencored by me) teachers think I’m not “working hard enough” and “just skimming the passages”
I swear one day teachers will realize kids love to learn and are not just "lazy".
My mom: "If someone is bullying you it means they are actually sad and you should feel bad for them and forgive them. Stand in their shoes and be kind to them."
Ok, I get that most bullies project insecurities or things they have heard from or experienced from their parents onto victims and that's super sad. BUT I have the COMPLETE right NOT to forgive someone who gave me lasting mental trauma and massive insecurities about my body and self-worth. You can stand in a bully's shoes and feel bad but being kind to my bullies never worked and only made them bully me more. Thank you for listening to my rant.
"Become a doctor, life will be easy."
No Dad and Mom, there won't be life left after becoming it.
I have instances where I didn't sleep for three nights consecutively to finish an assignment and also learn for upcoming exams meanwhile also doing field training.
Made me wonder what the hell I was doing.
that if you can't pay for it with cash, then you don't need it. at 35, i couldn't get a loan for a car because i had no credit. was told bad credit is better than no credit.
Dad: "Work hard and you can accomplish anything."
Also:
"If you don't like your job anymore, go to the next employer and play poker."
But at some point he realized that it doesn't work that way anymore and changed his mind.
Advice from my parents when I graduated from High School, 1970. "Why do you want to go to college? You can right now get a good job in a Steel Mill with good pay, as much as $6.00 an hour. You will have a good life on that pay, and plenty of job security. After all, this is Pittsburgh - there will always be steel mills."
The Yinzer steel mill mindset is still strong here. They’ve been closed 30+ years, but people still relive those days like they never ended
"Learn to adjust." (Hahaha. I will, depending on the place, time, and the person.)
"Women shouldn't laugh that loud." (I laugh wholeheartedly)
"Get a job that gives pension on retirement." A big LOL. (In India, only govt. jobs provide pension to retired employees, and getting a govt. job is like winning the lottery. It's not impossible, but I didn't have that much patience back then.)
There are more, but these came to my mind at this moment.
Make sure that at least half your money goes to the church. My parents run the church. I am 28.
50%?!? What kind of tithing is that? Wow, that is seriously scammer energy. Sorry, they're your parents, but damn
"Don't ask to be put on a waiting list. Don't ask for an application. Just tell them you'll take it." Referring to daycare enrollment and leasing apartments. There have been 3 year long waiting lists for daycare spots. Parents would enroll their kids at daycares in other parts of the city. About a decade ago, the government implemented an all-in-one waiting list, where you went online or called a number, to put your kid on one long list. I believe you'd have to put down the area you live in and whatever daycare has an open space in your area is what you got. If you decline you're back at the bottom of the list.
I don't know if it's still a thing anymore. But it came during a time daycares were complaining of parents getting aggressive with demands of getting their kids in. I imagine a lot of factors were at play, and pushy grandparents were one.
With apartment hunting, you can't just go in, say "I'll take it" and the landlord will just hand you the keys. It didn't work 21 years ago. I'm not sure in what era it did but that was believed to work by my mom and my now ex's parent's.
'Learn to play piano, there's always a piano anywhere you go'.
only if you live in Glee *_* like how is there a piano in every single episode AND an episode ABOUT PIANOS
"Go out into the sun and get some colour on you."
Thanks for the risk of skin cancer, folks.
Mom: Don't spend all that money on a computer. These things are useless.
(Boomer here - It was mainly for all the reports and dissertations during my studies, which otherwise took hours on the typewriter).
"just talk to them, its not f*cking rocket science"
for me, it kind of is.
I have social anxiety and i overthink EVERTHING. i spend way to much time thinking about how to start the conversation and what to say if they ask this and that and it is way more complicated than they think because its easier for them and honestly...i dont know, my parents think im a completely different person because of assumptions and they never ask me stuff and when they do, its stuff i never prepared to answer so i just answer with "i dont know" or dont answer at all.
