Hey Pandas, What Are Some Red Flags That People Ignore?

Yup. I know someone who does this to me, as I know they gossip about other people to me all the time. How I know is because it's to people I already know or eventually meet through her and their attitude towards me seems off. Like they're wary about from the first introduction and the whole visit is tense.

Really good to know. In my band, There is gossip about everybody, literally anyone. And my sister has been told of gossip about me too

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this isnt true at all lol.

If I see someone abusing animals I go batsh!t crazy. My neighbour once started hitting his dog and I went up to him and told him to stop or else.... He walks his dog and when he sees me he gives me the side-eye!

The red flag people ignore with this isn't blatant abuse. It's harsh control tactics (shock collars, spiked choke chains), making excuses for hitting, smacking animals ("I'm just showing who's boss." "Horses weigh tons. Giving him a smack doesn't hurt him at all. He's misbehaving."), bringing them in for cruel procedures such as declawing, debarking, docking tails, snipping ears and not having any empathy of what other living creatures are going through.

Declawing cats should be considered abuse

You are very right.

To me, a BIG red flag is if the dog doesn’t like somebody. Dogs are good judges. My little Sparky hated the plumber. Big time fear & loathing. Turned out to be a molester. Always trust your gut… and a dog.

I had this with my ex...we had been going out a few weeks and we were out in a nightclub. These two guys came over and we were just chatting and my ex saw red, he was all set to hurt those guys, for talking to me.

My father did that to me, definitely f****d me up a little

That's hard to decipher.

Depends on the job. Some jobs attract students but still have employees that stay for decades, like the company I work for. Ask how long has the most senior employee in the position you're apply for has been at the company in correlation to the age of the company. If there's a high turnover, and long term employees stuck in the same position with low pay means there's low chance of growing in the company and hard to leave if you don't get out soon enough.

Be sure to ask how the open position you are applying for became vacant, and then scrutinize the body language of the interviewer.

It's a pattern of abuse & also time to ditch anyone who does it.

Wait, this is a red flag? I'm not ignoring it, i thought so parents did that to their kids.

Oh. My. God. that is literally my friend atm!

ESPECIALLY sexually. I wish I'd learned this sooner. It didn't "slip" and if it did and he doesn't stop, yes, that's sexual assault. Rape. If I said don't put it there and you put it there, you committed sexual assault.

Or you explain just how to do something and they change it all up and fail, acting like it's your fault. Psycho.

People do things because they want to

Or I could see it as if a partner is doing something harmful like staying out all and not calling .

If you're asking the other person not to call you a certain nickname, then okay. But if you're trying to change his table manners and you can't live without them, then get out. You don't ask people to change just for you.

Projection and gaslighting can really f**k you up.

Don't buy into it-- let them know they ARE responsible for their own actions or inactions

I cannot keep your temper for you. You have to keep it yourself. If you lose it, that is not the fault of whoever was there when you lost it. They can't keep it for you. It's yours.

The greatly-missed "National Lampoon" in the 1970s ran a article that really drilled into racism. It was a mock newsletter from the AUTBD (American United to Beat the Dutch). The crude-looking newsletter was full of paranoid rants about Dyke-Building Schemes and forcing people to wear wooded shoes.

Dutch people are actually very nice.. I hate racism.. Even today I have experience not good.. I mean some people think are better that you just because you are not from is country. Is difficult being foreign..

What does this guy have against the Dutch?

My parents go through my phone when they take it away. Huge privacy breach. And I get it they just want me to be safe but please you wouldn’t want me going through your texts so don’t go through mine!

Even with shared lives, it is important to have little corners that are private, where that privacy is respected. The phone thing is not some much an invasion of privacy as it is a breakdown of trust.

I'm not sure if I agree this is a red flag all around. This is on a case-by-case basis. It should be fine if both are fine with it.

i think like 90 percent of parents have this red flag