50 Of The Most ‘Antisocial’ Memes From This Instagram Account Cleverly Titled ‘Fear Of Going Out’

September 3 years ago

It's often wiser to keep one's words to one's self

26points

Miss Cris 3 years ago

I'm not shy. It's just I don't want to talk to you.

3points

Daria B 3 years ago

Yeah, I'll just add that I do speak your language and understand, and have been listening all this time. I'm just not prone to naturally join the conversation about politics between the two old men of the family reunion (my father in law and the father in law of my sister in law, S. Korea). u.u

3points

Anne Morris 3 years ago

Hate it too! I thrive in silence and warm weather 🌝

0points

Peej Maybe 3 years ago

I get real sick and tired of my daughter (the quiet kid in class) being called out for her quiet thoughtfulness by Teachers. She gets excellent grades, she takes part when she has something to say but at every single parents' evening it's the same bullcrap "Oh if only she'd talk up a bit more in class" (most of the time she can't because the loud mouthy kids talk over her but the teachers aren't interested in dealing with that).

31points

Brendan Roberts 3 years ago

My kid is the loud mouthy one. I know he's not in your daughter's class, but I'd still like to say sorry on behalf of my little punk of a son.

7points

Coffee panda 3 years ago

My mom thought i was deficient cos im an introvert.

3points

Adrian 3 years ago

If she is like me then loud voices, loud music and loud noise in general is physically painful. I spend a lot of time with WiFi earbuds in. People think I am listening to music, etc. But no, they are switched off - they just cut down on the noise level. So go to parent/teacher nights and talk real, real loud as if you are stone deaf - and I mean really loud. When the teacher asks you to lower your voice, then revert to normal and explain that that is how your daughter perceives loud voices - it is physically painful. It might work. If not then ask the teacher to lower her voice because you find it painful. You never know it might work - it did for me once.

1point

Huddo's sister 3 years ago (edited)

I was that kid and so was my brother. He went on to study criminology and then do a masters in politics and Policymaking. He was also the kid that didn't talk until he was two, but when he did it was in full sentences. He listened and then spoke when he understood or questioned something, rather than speaking just to make noise.

0points

D K 3 years ago

THIS. My daughter is the same way.

0points

Sum Guy 3 years ago (edited)

I don't think Keanu has any social media accounts... he said this, but it was an interview and not that he just decided to write it down

20points

Narwhal Blast 3 years ago

I was thinking the same... I was like since when does Keanu have a Twitter account when he said that he doesn't have any social media? Hmmm... maybe he changed his mind about Twitter!

5points

Hazel Bon 3 years ago

Keanu doesn't have twitter...

15points

Mindghost 3 years ago

People always want me to talk more. But when i say something, they don't listen. So what's the point of talking?

11points

Nul Nemo 3 years ago

THIS!!👌🏻

1point

Coffee panda 3 years ago

Keanu never said this🙄. He doesnt have social media accounts.

9points

Michael Largey 3 years ago

Someone I had just met (but already had made me dislike her) said to me in front of a bunch of people: "You're awfully quiet." I gave no reaction and remained silent. After a while she said, "Why aren't you talking?" I said - very slowly - "Well, you said I was quiet, and I didn't want to show everyone how wrong you were." Whether you're an introvert or an extrovert, no one is entitled to your thoughts.

8points

Adrian 3 years ago

People see quietness as some kind of fault - shy and insecure. Some people are just naturally quiet and prefer quietness. Unfortunately LOUD trumps QUIET every time. If you are ever on a committee make sure you are the minutes secretary; that way every word you say will be recorded. People just don't listen to quiet people.

7points

Trees 3 years ago

The whole "...you don't talk much" from work colleagues, me thinking I talk lots to people I like or am engaged by.

6points

phil blanque 3 years ago

Many people are garrulous. They speak much, but often have little to say of any importance. For many of them, being with a person who appreciates silence is unnerving. I see this all the time, because I am one who appreciates silence.

5points

Trees 3 years ago

it's all fun and games until you meet someone even quieter than yourself, then it feels like aha! checkmate!

1point

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

Choose silence of all virtues, for by it you hear other men's imperfections and Conceal your own! G.B. Shaw.

4points

#2

You Do You, Boo
@rogerc137

Final score:

873points

POST

ChimeraBubbles 3 years ago

Yes, let's.

227points

Daniel Marsh 3 years ago

I was going to say, "Downvote Devil's Advocate all you want, but he's correct." But then I thought of the squirrel -- TRUE STORY -- in my neighborhood who would eat through a plastic trash bag at exactly the right spot to access the avocado remains -- twice a week, every week. Nice small hole in the bag. And he'd sit on the sidewalk nibbling away so prim and proper, you'd just want to buy him a China tea set.

22points

adiiantryx 3 years ago

making someone feel bad for the one thing they find joy in says a lot about you more than the person

40points

Perfumista Perfumista 3 years ago

Sadly, for some people, being nasty about these things is their tiny shriveled flower of joy

21points

Whowhatwherewhy? 3 years ago

Sad but true.

2points

LivingTheDream 3 years ago

I started playing D&D when I was 11. I'm over 50 now, still play and IDGAF what people think about my interests. It makes me happy. If it bothers you then YOU have the problem, not me.

15points

Miss Cris 3 years ago

What's D&D?

0points

Psycho Cat 3 years ago

Live and let live.

15points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

You want people to stop being intrusive, judgmental, annoying jerks? Good luck...

9points

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

I know, a tall order but we can hope

8points

tears_as_lube 3 years ago

yes yes yes yes

8points

Sinead Kenny 3 years ago (edited)

I never thought of it from that angle before 🤔 it's actually changed my point of view. Thanks, I will no longer whinge about all the above but smile thinking someone is happy right now 💖👏👏

6points

Connie Martin 3 years ago

I like this summary we use with groups of kids: Don't Yuck someone else's Yum.

6points

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

This is brilliant

3points

Sarah 3 years ago (edited)

Yes! Yes! Yes! (says the woman who still has her Christmas decorations up in February). ETA: The indoors ones; I'm not cruel.

5points

Chancey 3 years ago

My Christmas decorations always stay up at very least until after Epiphany and usually for most of January. I don't criticize others for putting their's up too darn early so they shouldn't worry about mine being up for the actual Christmas season.

0points

The term introversion was popularized by Carl Jung and describes an inwards orientation to one's own mental life rather than the outward orientation of extroverts to social life. Introverts gain energy from reflection and lose energy in social gatherings.

However, it's important to point out that most people are neither total introverts nor pure extroverts but display features of both—they are the so-called ambiverts. Almost everyone needs occasional solitude to replenish their energy.

#3

The Two Are Not The Same
@broderickhunter

Final score:

861points

POST

ChimeraBubbles 3 years ago

Yes! It's my free time and I am not available.

175points

Bexxxxx 3 years ago

This is why I hate when people start inviting me somewhere by asking “what are you doing tomorrow?” It’s awkward to say no to their plans when they now know I’m genuinely doing nothing but relaxing.

7points

Erik Lawrence 3 years ago

yup. thats what it says. why are you repeating it?

0points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

It seems today, ignorance or those who really don't care about you - don't think you need any down time but the one who's bugging you could do it himself - selfishness abounds!

0points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

"Are you busy? -Yes. I am busy taking the minimum amount of care of myself so I can keep a little bit of what remains of my mental and physical health. Thank you."

24points

Blackstone 3 years ago

I'm putting myself in mandatory time out for everyone's well-being.

7points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago (edited)

And just because I'm single doesn't mean I don't have a family. It may be a dog/cat/hamster/iguana or a houseplant. I still get to be unavailable.

17points

Just me, myself, and I 3 years ago

True! True true true!

2points

Kim Blizzard 3 years ago

All the points!!! I have one "friend" who will call, and if I don't answer she will text "I just called you". Yes, I know. And I'm not taking calls right now.

13points

Anne Edwards 3 years ago

If and when you want to respond to her text, you can text "yes and I didn't answer". No explanation of any kind is required.

3points

Quentin ingulfumble 3 years ago

Girlfriend: what do you have planned for the weekend? Me: nothing. Girlfriend: great, we can go to the beach and then we can go shopping and then we can..... Me: no. You misunderstand. I dont have nothing to do, i just plan to do nothing!

10points

Robert Thompson 3 years ago

Ture story: I am self employed and I don't work on Sundays. When making an appointment with a perspective client, I specified that "I don't work on Sundays". The perspective client then told me that that works for her and I could come over Sunday. We repeated these exact words 3 times before She realized that "I don't work on Sundays."

8points

Anne Edwards 3 years ago

But you will, of course work for her because it works for her./s

2points

Zoe's Mom 3 years ago

"Your're retired, can you watch my dog/cat/kids"? NO I didn't retire to make life easier for you. I retired to continue living my best life. !

8points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

And being single doesn't make me more available for extra work because I DONT HAVE A FAMILY. Yes I do, even if it's my cat/dog/hamster/iguana or houseplant. I'm not available.

8points

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

Europe is way ahead of the US. In some countries it's even illegal to contact employees on their day off.

8points

Nikki Sevven 3 years ago

I hear it all the time, "But you don't work!" No I don't, Karen, because I've been disabled for 23 years. My "free time" is spent in abject pain. I'm not over here living it up, ffs.

5points

Anne Edwards 3 years ago

Sorry for your circumstance but you don't need to explain anything. It's time that we all banded together to make it clear that we don't care what you want to do, we don't care that you have an emergency, we don't care that you need, want, must have ....., NO.

3points

#4

Feeling That Steve Carrell Energy
@donniedoesworld

Final score:

843points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Celebrity avoidance level 100

216points

Stannous Flouride 3 years ago

Well, actually: Celebrity avoidance level 31,000

11points

Panda-riffic 3 years ago

I'm looking at it more like he was there to be sure and outbid everyone to make sure that the charity received the most amount of money possible.

9points

PauWow 3 years ago

thats exactly what i was thinking

1point

Kona Pake 3 years ago

And he gets a $31,000 tax deduction.

3points

Katchen 3 years ago

I’ve never understood this point. It’s not like he gets $31,000 back as a tax refund. Charitable contributions can be deducted from your taxable income, but they don’t allow you to save more in taxes than you paid for the donation.

18points

R Carson 3 years ago

Clever AND a write off.

3points

KimB 3 years ago

It's probably fake but I love when celebrities act like good people and give back to charities

2points

Bob Standen 3 years ago

Well done.

2points

Micah 3 years ago

*Win-win...win

1point

chaotic awesome 3 years ago

is that a the office reference

0points

Vincent Walsh 3 years ago

no one saw this coming

1point

Anne Edwards 3 years ago

That's what she said.

0points

Id row 3 years ago

This is genius. That dinner would have been hell for him to sit through.

1point

phil blanque 3 years ago

HA! Brilliant.

1point

#5

I Never Leave Home Without It 😉
@samanthamatt1

Final score:

750points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Now everyone can be Anonymous.

116points

Dillon Brown 3 years ago

Everyone keeps talking about this Anonymous guy but I've never managed to find him 🤔

10points

Amanda Nolting 3 years ago

Introverts like myself have been preparing for pandemics our entire lives. Please stay away from me. No, I don't want a hug from you random stranger. Please cover your mouth and wash your hands before touching my food. Come on, please have online ordering and no contact pick up! God I hope no one recognizes me and wants to have a conversation. No, I really don't want to go to a crowded place and hang out. Literally our entire lives. Extroverts are suffering. We are thriving.

36points

madbakes 3 years ago

I wish I could upvote this a thousand times

11points

Stephanie Cunningham 3 years ago

Seriously...in 2020 when everyone had to stay home and I got to hang out with my cat, I was truly living my best life.

8points

Anne Edwards 3 years ago

Absolutely, the 10 foot/6 metres distance should be legislated as the normal, everday requirement.

6points

Sum Guy 3 years ago

The pandemic was made for people like us... I've worn sweatpants, hoodie and a mask since it started. I bring the hoodie so low don my face, that if I robbed a bank, no one would ever find me

24points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

And it also hides how ugly I am!

13points

Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 3 years ago

That's so relatable

8points

William Teach 3 years ago

One benefit of masking is I can make faces at idiots and they won't know, because I can make sure it doesn't reach my eyes

13points

GoddessOdd 3 years ago

I am almost dreading the day when I will look strange wearing a mask in public... I have no idea how long it will take me to unlearn this behavior. I am so used to mouthing 'a-hole' under my mask that it's second nature now!

12points

Rusti Gardina 3 years ago

I so totally do this! When I have sunglasses on I can even cross/ roll my eyes 😆

4points

Chancey 3 years ago

I do this!!!!

0points

Whowhatwherewhy? 3 years ago

I don't have that super power.

0points

Id row 3 years ago

And if you wear something with a hood in addition to the mask and sunglasses? You basically become the invisible man.

10points

Alexia 3 years ago

Plus, you can talk to your imaginary friends at will. The mask will guarantee your privacy

9points

J.A. Rogers 3 years ago

They also provide cover for silent cursing.

5points

Anne Edwards 3 years ago

That's not an issue for me, my cursing was rarely silent before or during the pandemic. I don't anticipate that changing in the future.

2points

SCamp 3 years ago

I find masks liberating for this exact reason

3points

Raiden Prime 3 years ago

Did you ever wanna dress like a ninja in public when you were a kid? Well good news!...

3points

But cultures differ in how they value certain personality traits, and America, for example, likes its extroverts. This society rewards assertiveness and encourages people to speak up.

Experts are guessing that the number of introverts as extroverts is the same, but the former is less visible and certainly less noisy so it's easy to think they're the minority.

Introverts are drained by too much social interaction and are the first to leave a party. Even as children, they usually observe first and act later.

#6

2022 Is Shaping Up To Be My Year 🙌
@house_feminist Random-Jot

Final score:

730points

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troufaki13 3 years ago

Standing directly in the doorway could go either way though...

107points

BlackestDawn 3 years ago

In their defense they didn't state if it was good or bad peak mental health.

22points

Earl Grey 3 years ago

Not if you rotate 180 every few minutes.

10points

Nicely 3 years ago

Such is the nature of doorways

10points

13 3 years ago

Face in glass full face out glass empty?

5points

Phill Healey 3 years ago

Ah but you won't know which until you open the door. Science.

2points

Chancey 3 years ago

Good for earthquakes though. lol

1point

rumade 3 years ago

Revolving doorway solves both problems with added endorphins from exercise

21points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

Never thought of that. It's a win win.

5points

Daniel (ShadowDrakken) 3 years ago

Why do you think porchsitting is so common in rural areas?

12points

Terry Tobias 3 years ago

I live in an apartment in a house built in the 1800's. It's in the historical part of the city. I love to sit on the front porch of our tree-lined street with a glass of wine and relax. It's one of the best parts of my summer and really helps with my depression.

7points

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

I stand in my back garden. Watch my cats in silence, no one talking to me, drink my coffee. Go back inside that's enough outside for one day.

11points

Ripley 3 years ago

I think you mean "standing in the doorway to achieve peak cat". This also may be good for mental health.

8points

Rage of Aquarius 3 years ago

Being alone at the beach.

5points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

Great idea, but it's difficult when it's -20F outside.

4points

Guy MacGregor 3 years ago

Say hi from afar to your neighbor, yell at the kids running on your lawn and voilà!

2points

Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago

Ahh, so that's what I am doing wrong?

2points

Dave van Es 3 years ago

And then not remembering why you are standing there

1point

#7

Yes 😭
@deelalz

Final score:

725points

POST

Jo Johannsen 3 years ago

If I'm ever in one of those horror movie/ thriller situations where my life depends on how quietly I can breath, I'd like donations to charity in lieu of flowers.

229points

-Straw- 3 years ago

* breathe * xD

1point

DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago

Me - "*wheeeeezzzzzz* wow that was a tough climb" Friend - "Dude, we were on an escalator"

19points

Wise beauty 3 years ago

Nope I don’t trust those things, I’d rather take the stairs thank you very much

2points

alex mitchell 3 years ago

I had to run for the bus today. Thank God for face masks to hide my winded breaths

15points

Catherine Graffham 3 years ago (edited)

I wear glasses, so it’s still obvious I’m breathing hard lol

6points

Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago

Nah, we can see that mark furiously pulling in and out lol

2points

Remi 3 years ago

So sorry to tell you but they totally can see. The mask moves like bellows when you're winded

-1point

TGHW 3 years ago

Who even needs a hill?

10points

Navindu Wijewardena 3 years ago

I'm a bit fat, and there are some hellish stairs to my classroom at school, and oh god this is so relatable

8points

Kenny Kulbiski 3 years ago

Semi related. To all those young, super fit cyclists who zoom by me when I'm on my bicycle; please have the courtesy to at least pretend like you're panting.

6points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

Yeah... I'm not proud of that...

6points

Iggy 3 years ago

Every morning!

3points

greenbean 3 years ago

For this exact reason I always wear headphones - in order not to hear my own gasping 🤣

2points

Arthur Waite Premium 3 years ago

Not to mention the crunching of the knees, and the popping hip joints...

0points

phil blanque 3 years ago

Of course...and when walking in the park, you speed up....just a little....if you hear someone coming up behind you and you do not want them to pass you.

2points

#8

Pure Icon Status
@kristen_arnett

Final score:

721points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Now that's a power move!

167points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

Saw a video of a guy at a crosswalk and an old lady was slowly crossing - He honked she turned and slammed down on his hood - and the airbags went off! Instant Karma!

9points

-Straw- 3 years ago

very true

5points

Sooploosh MacSchnibble 3 years ago

Imagine the driver was rushing their dying kid to the hospital.

1point

EP 3 years ago

Honking at pedestrians IN A CROSSWALK where they have the right of way and are vulnerable to death by a car not noticing the signal to walk… yeah you just don’t honk at pedestrians. Your life isn’t more important to theirs that you need to let them know their reduced carbon foot print, makes them a problem for your impatience. The world does not revolve around you. We share it. With bikes and motorcycles, and yes, pedestrians - aka other humans. Wow.

28points

Tami 3 years ago (edited)

BUT then one time I was in a hurry taking my mom to the emergency room because her doctor had called and said her sodium was dangerously low based on a blood test from earlier that day and to drive her to the E-room NOW, and on the way she was suddenly very sick, vomiting and really out of it. So I was hurrying to the hospital with her, but a sports event had just let out and I had to stop for lots of people crossing the street and they were taking their sweet time, goofing off in the middle of the intersection, and my elderly mom was puking and semi-conscious, and I wanted them to hurry the f**k up and get out of the way, but was afraid to honk because people get angry and do dumb stuff when they think they're so important they can't ever just get the hell out of the way sometimes.

6points

Tami 3 years ago

I was stopped at an interesection yesterday near a grade school where there was also a school crossing. A group of 30 or 40 little kids was crossing there, so traffic was backing up a little, and people were getting angry and honking because the light was green but traffic was backed up. Criminy, folks, switch to decaf or something!

14points

DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago

I'd like to be her friend, she seems awesome.

11points

boredkoala 3 years ago

Yeah...honking or yelling at me in a crosswalk has gotten many a pissy driver a free show to just how slow I can possibly walk while maintaining eye contact ....how do you like me now 😶😶😶

10points

boredkoala 3 years ago

Wow, look at all these people in the comments lining up to murder humans with their cars...sheesh

0points

Olivia Mansfield 3 years ago

Walk faster if your not disabled then. Self entitled s**t

0points

Sooploosh MacSchnibble 3 years ago

me and my anger problems woulda just ran you over.

-1point

Gary Harkins 3 years ago

Right. Somebody gonna slap the s**t out of you one day. I'll look for it on YouTube

-1point

Dee Lee 3 years ago

Better?

-1point

KimB 3 years ago

Lol! "I'm gliding here!!!" ~ Sandra Bullock Miss Congeniality

5points

Earl Grey 3 years ago

You are required by law to yield to pedestrians, crosswalk or not. If you don’t like the laws governing vehicular traffic then don’t drive.

5points

Id row 3 years ago

That's how you establish dominance, lol.

5points

Colin L 3 years ago

Good morning to everyone except the asshat who decided to honk. Seriously, FU dude.

4points

TheDivineMsM 3 years ago

This would make my day

4points

Some research claims that the inherent differences between introverts and extroverts lie within the dopamine system in the brain, which makes pleasurable rewards (including social interaction) more salient to extroverts. This suggests that extroverts may be more likely to experience positive emotions.

Even though introverts are generally likely to report lower levels of happiness than extroverts, this does not mean that they are destined to be miserable. The good news is that a consistent theme in happiness research claims our choices and behaviors (the ones that are in our control and changeable) have significant effects on our well-being.

#9

*slow Clap*
@introvertplanet576

Final score:

675points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Give this person a Nobel!

182points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

Now that is what I would really call a PEACE PRIZE!

8points

September 3 years ago

This should be everywhere but with a button that changes the color for when you do need help.

17points

LuckyL 3 years ago

there should be a third color for "I don't know yet, I'll ask you when I need help"

5points

A Strike 3 years ago

I love Japan and it’s the only international travel destination I have ever been to and no one in my family gets it. They tease me about being such a japanophile, but the truth is I’m not really into the traditional things that most Americans obsess about Japan for. Yeah anime and manga are cool enough and Tokyo is eclectic to say the least, but the secret reason I go there over and over is they have amazing amazing restaurant I really love by the hotel I stay in that has a button you can press and you will be completely ignored from start to finish unless you press that button. Completely. Ignored.

15points

Daria B 3 years ago

Korea has many places like this....

4points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

Pure Bliss!

0points

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

lucky you !!! i miss my stay in a ryokan, and the onsen .... ! *sigh*

0points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

Being a woman over 60, it saves the "Can I help you 'dear' question.

12points

Grace Noyes 3 years ago

As a 60-year-old woman, I can relate to this! It's all I can do to keep my temper when some 20-year-old girl calls me "sweetie" or "dear." The nerve!

6points

CatGirl 3 years ago

This should be EVERYWHERE

6points

Alexia 3 years ago

I want to see this in all shops

5points

-Straw- 3 years ago

more people want to be alone than to be assisted!

4points

Rachel 3 years ago

I feel like Lush needs to adopt this approach

4points

Bevo Nostro 3 years ago

How about some white baskets for those who only want assistance from other shoppers...

2points

Purple Gerbil 3 years ago

Aw I’m an introvert who likes being left alone in shops but I currently work in a bath and beauty store (not sephora) and we are told we have to greet the customers and ask if they need help. It’s so tedious but I get moaned at if I don’t do it.

2points

#10

*promptly Exits*
@showerfeelings

Final score:

662points

POST

Kirsten Kerkhof 3 years ago

Absolutely! It triggers my sarcastic teacher button and prepare to be subtly sabotaged wherever I can do so.

139points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

I have always wondered why they need a response ,we are here to hear what you have to say not cheer you on!

15points

Tonk Terrier 3 years ago

Amen. From this point on, don't bother. I hate you and want you to die

4points

Pavol Dvorský 3 years ago

You should reply him as Gandalf - What do you mean?" "Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on?

1point

September 3 years ago

Right! They're supposed to say: I'm sorry that you had to be here today. I'll do my best to make this as short and painless as possible....

22points

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

God no, i just shut off. I think that and role play in work, standing up and telling people about yourself should be banned. I never do anything like that in my class and refuse to annoy people with that guff

20points

Silre 3 years ago

The last time I had to do that it was right after my husband died and I just burst into tears when they got to me.

14points

Alexis 3 years ago

My company makes everyone stand up to say our name and how many years we have worked here during the annual meeting. I don't like that...

8points

Nini 3 years ago

You unlocked core trauma memories rn

4points

Silre 3 years ago

I haven't said good morning in decades. I will acknowledge that it is morning, but there's nothing good about it.

13points

Naesil 3 years ago

Yeah we literally usually just say morning in our language and I have had people from other countries ask why are you saying morning instead of good morning... well we dont b******t small talk in our country so if the morning is not specially good then why say so? :D

5points

Frankenfrog 3 years ago

I'd upvote you 3 million times if I could

3points

Chancey 3 years ago

The only good thing about morning is that it will eventually turn in to afternoon and night. I don't properly function until 2:00 pm.

1point

Joe Das 3 years ago

I say F**K YOU amid the loud fake "good morning" so no one can hear

13points

Zophra 3 years ago

Made me laugh!

5points

Gaby Almodovar 3 years ago

People overly happy and cheering at 7 f****n' morning are sociopaths.

10points

Lillukka79 3 years ago

I banned one of my work mates from my office before the coffee brake at 9. Just couldn't handle the over enthusiastic chirpines in the morning.

2points

Tami 3 years ago

Always hated it when, 45 minutes into a presentation, the speaker mentions something and says, "But we'll get to that later."

7points

April Stephens 3 years ago

Especially when you know from experience that they are not likely to make it to that part later!

3points

WeDontTalkAboutBruno 3 years ago

i get quieter just to spite them

7points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

If we're expected to say a great big GOOD MORNING back, that makes me just sit there with my arms crossed and not say anything. Quiet rebellion from my introvert self.

3points

Lillukka79 3 years ago

Same, plus I won't take anything after that seriously.

1point

rumade 3 years ago

Only evil people say that. I had a speaker once remind us that free coffee was available at the back of the hall and we were welcome to help ourselves anytime. We must have all looked like zombies

3points

#11

May You Go To Work Tomorrow With The Confidence Of A 4 Year Old 🙏
@honeymustardmama

Final score:

656points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

This is acceptable for adults too. I did this today to someone. I didn't scream it, but still.

153points

NJWanderer 3 years ago

I do it, usually with diplomacy

7points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

But sometimes even a gentle no may require some self defense - believe me!

2points

Crissy Brandt 3 years ago

I would like to hear more about this!

2points

Eagle Girl 3 years ago

Me too with our neighborhood gossip who btw, is a Man.

1point

Paul Jordan 3 years ago

Madison, I love every one of your comments. But I really hope this one you actually did. That’s power

0points

The Penguin Bandit 3 years ago

So, no one else gets out of these situations by suddenly looking at their watch, shouting "oh, s**t!!" And running away? Because it works like every time

17points

Christina Hill 3 years ago

No but ill be wearing a watch from now on!! THANK YOU!

3points

GoddessOdd 3 years ago

on the upside, if you live long enough you re-enter this life stage. Old people think nothing of speaking their minds. I walked into a hospital room once with my therapy dog. The lady said "YOU'RE FAT" as I walked in... which made me laugh, and here I thought I was hiding it so well! The nurse rolled her eyes as she was leaving the room and said "isn't she the sweetest thing?/s"

6points

madbakes 3 years ago

This is what I look forward to most when I'm old. I wouldn't say that, like that lovely woman, but if someone is being a jackass I will be all over it.

2points

Kate 3 years ago

Does it count if I open the door to find people holding religious tracts and immediately close the door again? Because it's been over ten years and they haven't been back, so...

6points

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

open the door again, and release their stuck fingers

13points

Karis Ravenhill 3 years ago (edited)

See someone you know. Smile automatically, open your mouth as if you're about to talk or say their name, glance over their shoulder, let your eyes go wide, your jaw drop and mutter "oh my GOD!" and run past them to somewhere else. They will never follow, and they'll never ask what happened. You're welcome.

5points

Lily Mae Kitty 3 years ago

I did this not long ago only I said "Stop! You are fu*king nuts and I don't want to hear it!" Omg, it's so not like me to do things like that but I have always thought she's a weirdo(we're in the same biz so run into each other) and she literally starting spouting the craziest crap yet.(pretty sure she's deep in Q brainwash mode waiting on JFK Jr to show up)

5points

Christina Hill 3 years ago

Sometimes this is the only solution.

0points

Gigi 3 years ago

My roommate and I had a code "Oh my god, my tummy!" And we would just take off. The other would follow..." oh hunny!"..and never look back

4points

Emily Macaluso 3 years ago

My friend teaches kindergarten and when she comes to school without makeup she will be relentlessly asked 'what happened to your face??' and 'are you sick??'

3points

Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago

If we’re acting like toddlers, then I’m punching people in the face for acting like toddlers, and you can’t be mad at me because I’m acting like a toddler.

2points

Adrian 3 years ago

I want a button on my mobile phone that I press in my pocket and 30 seconds later gives the signal for an incoming call. Enough time to say 'hello' and then 'sorry I am expecting his call from my ...' - insert doctor / lawyer / plumber / dying father etc as appropriate.

2points

Esté 3 years ago

There was a Samsung phone who had this option..

0points

#12

Absolute Icon Status
@pilotviruet

Final score:

650points

POST

GoddessOfChaos 3 years ago

Oh…OH

147points

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

same :D

16points

bxttery_bxby 3 years ago

Fun fact: I'm related to Amelia Earhart. She was my great great great aunt or smth like that. I think it's pretty cool.

19points

ashlynn i guess 3 years ago

my great great gmas aunt was amelia earhart

4points

Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago

Actually you could say you are gonna dress up in full Camo, no one can see you dressed in that lol.

16points

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

hu hu hu, little genius :)

3points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

That's dark humor, but that's funny.

15points

GoddessOdd 3 years ago

In honor of Harry Houdini's Halloween birthday, I have gone as Houdini a couple times. I show up, but slip out ASAP.

9points

Id row 3 years ago

Also could have gone as The Invisible Man.

7points

Camilo Is best 3 years ago

I dont get it

3points

Damitria 3 years ago

Amelia Earhart disappeared on her last plane trip. No one knows, where, how or why. She told them she was going as her and disappeared like Amelia.

8points

Jackie Lulu 3 years ago (edited)

Only another introvert will get this! Ha ha ha ha

2points

LJ Robinson 3 years ago

That's what I thought too!! It's so great!!

0points

Michael Largey 3 years ago

Males who want to pull this off can say they're going as Judge Crater.

2points

J. Normal 3 years ago

Jimmy Hoffa... Too old?

3points

José Figueiredo 3 years ago

or Jonh Cena

2points

Bent. O. Jensen 3 years ago

D.B. Cooper

0points

lara 3 years ago

That's like the all white painting. The painting was entitled "Cow Eating Grass". When the patron asked the artist where the grass was, the artist replied "the cow ate it all". When the patron asked where the cow was, the artist replied "since he ate all the grass he left."

1point

According to Derrick Carpenter, a positive psychology coach at Happify, a helpful tip for those with introverted tendencies is to try to see their whole self. "It’s important to note that the scale on which introversion and extroversion are measured is just that: a scale," Carpenter wrote in VeryWell Mind. "Within each of us lies some tendency to recharge our batteries through social interaction and affiliation with others and another tendency to recharge on our own. Be honest with yourself about what you need in a given moment and allow yourself permission to have it."

In other words, when calling a friend to hang out feels right, make a lunch date. But if you’d rather curl up with a good book, go for it.

#13

I So Wish I Could Do This On Command
twitter / Unburntwitch

Final score:

632points

POST

C. Wade 3 years ago

ffs this is gold 😂 dude probably thought you were a zombie

223points

Sleepy Burger 3 years ago

Or a vampire

20points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

Or a crack addict.

11points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

Maybe if you added a little audio, like growling or groaning noises! It could add to the ambiance!

4points

Remi 3 years ago

Well he's safe from zombies. They want braaaiinz after all

2points

Chancey 3 years ago

Bet he didn't think you from Iceland though - Zoe!!!

0points

Daniel Marsh 3 years ago

Pretty sure that it's fake. I've read of this same story told in other ways.

0points

R Carson 3 years ago

They do have fake blood capsules if you'd like to try again.

23points

thatdisasterpanda 3 years ago

good idea!

1point

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

I would pay money to see this!

21points

Iggy 3 years ago

He probably still has nightmares. Serves him right!

15points

Jon S. 3 years ago

Can we just take a moment to appreciate "Yennifer of Vengaboys'" name.

13points

Haley Beck 3 years ago

Had somewhat the same experience except I had just had these numbing injections in the back of my head and neck for migraines, dr overdid it a little causing half of my face to go completely numb and temporarily paralyzed. Walking out of the office it's summertime and I was killing it in a tank top and Jean mini skirt, jeep full of hot guys pull through the parking lot behind me whistling and honking and I turn around with one eye open face sagging and drooling all over myself and not even thinking tried my hardest to half smile and wave. I've never seen a vehicle turn around and speed off as quickly as they did. I still die laughing every time I think of what I must have looked like because their faces were priceless!

10points

DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago

Reminds me of the meme where the girl basically made a t-rex sound. Brilliant!

6points

Rae Black 3 years ago

I laughed so hard, this is perfection

3points

Flash Henry 3 years ago

I love this so much.

3points

The only Plueschopossum 3 years ago

Awesome move :D

3points

#14

Sayyy Hayyyy 🙌🙌
@hyejinhere

Final score:

631points

POST

ChimeraBubbles 3 years ago

My people.

185points

Sequoia 3 years ago

Hello.

8points

Micah Chips 3 years ago

hello

3points

Gin Sutaraito 3 years ago

Wassup

2points

Wise beauty 3 years ago

Twinsies!

2points

Tonk Terrier 3 years ago

Our people

2points

Chaotic-Pansexual (she/they) 3 years ago

Hi

2points

The Chosen One 3 years ago

hello

2points

Chancey 3 years ago

Nothing has ever described me better than this!

1point

Lex 3 years ago

Yep. Mine, too.

0points

Nul Nemo 3 years ago

Right here!

0points

Lisa Monzon 3 years ago

Mine as well. But, I am bipolar, so that could be part of it.

0points

Daria Z 3 years ago

I'm literally doing this right now. I'm supposed to work but... Bored Panda.

16points

Tami 3 years ago

I'm sooooo glad I didn't find this site when I was still working!

3points

DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago

My name is Denny and I am part of this group.

11points

StayClassy 3 years ago

We get 2 sweet spots: Avoidance and panic!

9points

MaryAnn Ryan 3 years ago

Sounds like my fellow ADHD brains!!

5points

Crazy Dog Lady 3 years ago

I was about to say the same! Looks like someone has undiagnosed adhd.

0points

RandomHumanBean 3 years ago (edited)

who is spying on me????

5points

Chris Osborn 3 years ago

It's reassuring to know it's not just me. I am all of these.

3points

Ancsuri 3 years ago

Thats me!!!

2points

Helen Haley 3 years ago

Back at ya

2points

Daniel Lesnick 3 years ago

You've just described the first half and second half of every shift I've ever worked in perfect, succinct, profound detail. Thank you.

1point

#15

Thank You Ffs

Final score:

582points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

*Aggressively throws a pair of airplane headphones at the perpetrator*

179points

Iggy 3 years ago

I hope they were wrapped around a brick...

25points

RandomX123 3 years ago

I had to reread this because I missed out "headphones"

13points

JennaMae 3 years ago

Or toss the speaker in the water....

5points

$fracarr avatar$

François Carré 3 years ago

*Aggressively buries bluetooth speaker under a ton of sand and pebbles*.

3points

NJWanderer 3 years ago

Some places are posting Quiet beach areas

3points

Jackie Nettleton 3 years ago

No that’s to passive for me what you do is go plug in the headphones and then shove the headphones at them

2points

Jude Fire 3 years ago

Don't you mean "passive aggresively tosses a pair of airplane headphones really hard"?

2points

phil blanque 3 years ago

Yeah...people should be required to take a course in beach etiquette. Well, actually, many people need a course in just everyday etiquette.

18points

Chancey 3 years ago

The problem is that most people are just oblivious to their surroundings. Makes me so mad.

2points

Giovanni 3 years ago

Sooner or later i will buy a jammer, immagine a 10 meter signal void around you, no istagrammers, no bloothoth speakers, no loud phonecalls.

15points

SeidWolf 3 years ago

why I love winter - most people avoid the outside, so i FINALLY get quiet time with nature

9points

Jo Gabriel 3 years ago

I hate this so much!! You end up having to walk miles down the beach just to avoid those selfish arseholes. I couldn't confront them. I would be scared they'd have a go at me rather than turn it down.

8points

JJ 3 years ago

Should show this to my neighbor who listens to the radio all day long ... in his garden ... so that everyone can hear radio ... and not birds.

8points

Zophra 3 years ago

Agreed! Our otherwise nice neighbors have an outdoor tv and speakers. It sucks terribly.

6points

Steve Fischer 3 years ago

People who play their souped up stereos in their car that is loud enough to rattle windows should be ticketed for public nuisance immediately and forced to drive with no radio

7points

Piet Zwanenburg 3 years ago

I love searching for those speakers on my phone, and play some real embarrassing s**t when I can connect.

7points

Rusti Gardina 3 years ago

Beethoven and Tchaikovsky are my favorites

2points

Svelte Pantologist 3 years ago

Even worse is the ridiculous a**hole going to the nature preserve with their speaker blaring as they walk the trails.

4points

Kaseylulu 3 years ago

Yes, I live near Yosemite so I go there often and I have had to share the trail multiple times with people who are hiking while blasting their speakers. The beach I can understand, even if I don't agree with it, but on a trail??

1point

Monkey Spunk 3 years ago

I remember being on the beach in Mauritius with some arsehat having a shouted Skype call to someone back in the UK. Everyone was giving her dirty looks, she didn't bat an eyelid.

4points

#16

If This Isn't Goals I Don't Know What Is

Final score:

571points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

I want to be Enya!

168points

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

i want to be one of the cats

34points

Who Panda 420 3 years ago

If I was I would sail away sail away sail away

13points

Rage of Aquarius 3 years ago

I've always wanted to be Enya.

7points

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

And make coloured in silence?

2points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

I want to be Enya too, but add books and dogs - thanks!

1point

Emma Stahl 2 years ago

me too!

0points

tillytrot1000 3 years ago

So do I !!

0points

J Sizz 3 years ago

Enya mouthhole! Zing!

0points

Amir Ahmed Asif 3 years ago

And, she doesn't do concerts, we don't see her photos on magazine covers (those sold near the check out counters), we don't know which beach she went. She has a peaceful life.

30points

Glirpy 3 years ago

She’s like Kate Bush #2

1point

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

A castle... Cats... Nobody to annoy you... Lots of money... That's the life I want, and I don't care if my cats eventually eat my corpse!

25points

Karis Ravenhill 3 years ago

She gets to be an artist, a celebrity, alone, has cats, millions, and her own fuc*ing castle but deals with none of the fame bullshi* the rest of celebrities have to deal with. Why isn't she writing role model courses for schoolgirls?

11points

Rider 3 years ago

If visitors do show up, they can play hide and seek. Enya "I'll count to 100. 1, 2 3..." goes back to whatever she was doing.

9points

Chenga Animates 3 years ago

life goals

8points

ElenaK 3 years ago

Look how happy Enya is!

5points

Monkey Spunk 3 years ago

Is the nautical version of "jog on" sail away?

4points

Esté 3 years ago

Hahaha, brilliant😂

0points

Sawyer Kidder 3 years ago

I wanna be her with my dogs

4points

Jo Johannsen 3 years ago

I knew there was something special about her. 😎

4points

Carpenter also thinks introverted behavior has an upside that often gets overlooked. "Introverts tend to be better problem solvers, perform better academically, exhibit stronger regulation of their behavior, and are less likely to take risks that may cause them harm," he said.

"Research shows that introverts may experience these benefits as a result of having more gray matter in their prefrontal cortex, the area at the front of the brain that controls complex and abstract thinking, emotion regulation, and decision making."

#17

I Just *get* It
@danny_watson93

Final score:

525points

POST

Navindu Wijewardena 3 years ago

Or why Squidward is so depressed

100points

Lara Verne 3 years ago

Squidward is relatable.

7points

L.a. Williams 3 years ago

Poor squidward has SpongeBob and patrick as neighbors. Does stupid get much lower. I'm scared it might.

4points

Abrufal 3 years ago

I actually understand SpongeBob better the older I get the less I give a s**t if people know I'm nuts

3points

BasedWang 3 years ago

yuuuuuup... so hard yup

2points

DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago

100%. He was bullied and made fun off by those in Whoville...but nooooo he's the bad guy.

7points

Trin DM 3 years ago

Just lost my baby girl Mia, my boxer. I was happy living alone with her. My heart is broken, miss her so much :(

3points

Chancey 3 years ago

Awwww so sorry!

1point

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

What a beautiful world it would be if people had hearts like dogs

2points

Yort 3 years ago

He literally says he can’t stand how noisy the Whos are. Why is this so hard to understand?

2points

Summer Mason 3 years ago

That money really does buy everything.

2points

Barbara Weiss 3 years ago

You'd cry if I could explain to you how wrong you are

0points

MelB126 3 years ago

Mean girls will always be mean girls.

1point

Haley Beck 3 years ago

YES

1point

Talia Mclaren 3 years ago

yes go danny

1point

Engelhafen 3 years ago

Wrinkles

0points

#18

My Ability To Care For Succulents Is Proof That I Should Not Be A Parent
houseplant Addicts Via @thetinderblog

Final score:

520points

POST

The Penguin Bandit 3 years ago

Teenagers are like the moles in your yard and raccoons in your trash can and ants in your kitchen and yeah, I'll just take the plants and pets, thank you.

124points

Alex Luiz 3 years ago

I like teenagers because they are the most cat-like. Like, technically if you released them into the wild they could keep themselves alive, but really they still need to be looked after if you want them to stay healthy, even if there is no obvious gratitude.

26points

AmmoniteCat 3 years ago

Thanks for your opinion of us. Raccoons are cute, though, and so are moles.

14points

BORKADYMUSIC 3 years ago

Haha yeah nobody wants a me, us teenagers are garbage lol

3points

Wise beauty 3 years ago

Lol I’m not that bad, I keep to my self

2points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

Yes Bandit, but could I have the racoon, and moles as pets too, Thank you!

2points

Bored Panda 3 years ago

As a teenager, I'm kinda sad now

2points

Rennie they/them/theirs 3 years ago

gee, thanks 😂

1point

StrangerOfTheDark 3 years ago

i have a bell pepper plant, an allium, and a monstera, and that's all I need.

1point

Yort 3 years ago

Teenagers grow up into adults who comment on boredpanda.

1point

Sooploosh MacSchnibble 3 years ago

well f**k you, too.

0points

O-man The Human 3 years ago

Currently a teenager, can confirm, accurate

0points

Amaranthim Talon 3 years ago

Mine's 25. He's just hitting his stride in the raccoon phase..

0points

Sheila Stamey 3 years ago

Yes. Teens eat absolute horrible things, they stink to high heaven, they trash the place, they bring their stinky friends who help them, and eat all the sweets. Just when you get fed up, one of these gnarly beasts walks over, bear hugs you until you hear your ribs crack and says, "I love you mom" then disappears! Like it never happened and you are left, loving them all over again.

9points

C C 3 years ago

So true!

1point

Hime 3 years ago

My only kid is like a feral cat. He only comes around when he wants food, hisses at me when I interrupt his gaming, then paws at my wallet until cash falls out, and bolts like the hounds of Hades are on his booty when I yell his name. Overall, a perfect cat.

6points

Id row 3 years ago

More like mosquitos. They suck the life out of you and leave marks on your body.

3points

New Prometheus 3 years ago

Ooof casual hate against children much? Don't the children of the world have enough to deal with without unnecessary hate from adults?

1point

Bobbie Meyers 3 years ago

I have wept when a beloved plant died. She was a massive Aloe that despite years of excellent care after being rescued at near death, she was just done.😢

2points

Sith Ramen 3 years ago

what are the new plants then?

1point

Kai David 3 years ago

I went shopping with my husband. He had the list. We finished rather quickly. I looked in the trolley and it was nearly empty. I was confused, is that all we need. He nodded yes. Doesn't look right, but ok. Our regular cashier greeted us. As she was ringing us out, she said- the kids finally moved out. Our lightbulbs were a little dim, but brightened up when we both said YES at the same time

1point

J.A. Rogers 3 years ago

And neither plants nor pets will ever wreck your car or expect you to put them through college.

1point

Alessandro Delann 3 years ago

👌

0points

Engelhafen 3 years ago

Kids are like mosquitos

0points

#19

Final score:

519points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

I also read.

295points

QibliOfTheSandWings 3 years ago

So do I. I also play the trumpet 🎺_(._. ) doot

22points

Evil Little Thing 3 years ago

I read and have aquariums. It's a twofer because I can read next to my big aquarium and enjoy both.

7points

Carbonel 3 years ago

I also also read…. And knit.

5points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

I lie to read - books made of paper that does hot have to shine a light in my face!

3points

Smilejustbecause 3 years ago

Read and be in your own world! Yes!!

3points

KimB 3 years ago

Working on my own library...I also like to sing there's an app I like called Smule let's you record yourself just like you are in a music studio there's the ability to record video and you can sing with other app users it's fun. I believe music is a language we can all understand and appreciate :)

2points

Remi 3 years ago

😂😂😂

1point

CanidaeVulpes 3 years ago

In bed

1point

Nadine Bamberger 3 years ago

While I watch TV, lie on my bed and/or eat.

1point

Trillian 3 years ago

A lot!

1point

Piet Puk 3 years ago

Where are the books and the cats?

26points

iffypedia 3 years ago

introverts: *points to screen with boredpanda on it*

12points

Gin Sutaraito 3 years ago

Sounds about right

1point

Heather G 3 years ago

Umm no. Introverts have lots of hobbies. Mine are reading, writing, art, video games. Tv is not a hobby. Tv, sleeping, and eating are not hobbies. Cooking can be. Being an introvert doesn't make us lazy. It means we recharge with alone time.

10points

Heather G 3 years ago

Also, I'm not saying watching tv or the other things are bad. They just aren't describing being introverted. They are describing giving yourself a break which is also important.

7points

Jeff Garner 3 years ago

If this is my cousin Heather...Shut up! My hobbies, my choice. If this is not cousin Heather... Shhhh!

1point

Kristal 3 years ago

I disagree with TV not being a hobby. Frequenting cinemas/watching movies is a hobby and many TVs stream movies now. Netflix could definitely be a hobby.

1point

M O'Connell 3 years ago

Would you like to meet my soldering iron and tablesaw?

9points

over it already 3 years ago

...and belt sander, and dremel, and...

0points

troufaki13 3 years ago

I would happily share my introvert-ness with him though! ^.^ 😂😂

9points

Paddling Panda 3 years ago

I came here to write the exact same thing. ;-)

3points

Tom 3 years ago

An introvert would never post this though...

7points

Susan Wilson 3 years ago

Introverts are all about hobbies - that we can do alone.

4points

Id row 3 years ago

You left off computer.

4points

Kathryn Baylis 3 years ago

An introvert can have any hobby that doesn’t require a crowd of people. You can sew by yourself. Same with knitting, sculpting, throw pots, collect whatever you enjoy collecting, etc. Hell, if you’ve got the room, you can make furniture, restore classic cars, or any other hobby that needs room. The possibilities are nearly endless.

3points

#20

Literally The Only Phone Call I’m Interested In Taking
@karenkilgariff

Final score:

516points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

I suppose you peeled out of there after that?

203points

Martin Kaine 3 years ago

She made her feelings plain-tain.

15points

3 years ago

She left lickety-split

8points

-Straw- 3 years ago

(pun intended)

3points

JennaMae 3 years ago

Haha terribly good of you

2points

Ian Taggart 3 years ago

You just HAD to get that started....

1point

Ogre Juan 3 years ago

*Groan*

1point

Martha Higgins 3 years ago

Good one!

0points

Luther von Wolfen 3 years ago

Note to self: always have a banana handy.

14points

Rain.coffee.exe 3 years ago

If only... *cries in allergic*

4points

DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago

"Always take a banana to a party" - 10th Doctor.

7points

Jo Johannsen 3 years ago

Coulda used your shoe à la Maxwell Smart.

6points

ZAPanda 3 years ago

hahaha this is brilliant

4points

Micah 3 years ago

I'm literally listening to the MFM podcast as I read this entry.

3points

ChimeraBubbles 3 years ago

I hear this in her voice. Lol.

3points

Jackie Nettleton 3 years ago

I don’t understand why you couldn’t just say excuse me I just need to freshen up or some other polite way to get away from the, if you need to be on good terms with the group or if you don’t just say this is boring and walk away it’s really simple and easy to do

2points

Auntriarch 3 years ago

Because the banana means they won't come back when you return

3points

Ogre Juan 3 years ago

You're No Fun

1point

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

Yep you can always give the I gotta pee excuse - but politely even if they are jerks!

0points

Sith Ramen 3 years ago

they must have thought you were bananas .... i will excuse myself i am sorry

2points

Silre 3 years ago

Of course it's Karen Kilgariff

2points

Remember that in many classical and theological perspectives on happiness from Aristotle to the Buddha, spending time alone and contemplating the meaning and purpose of our lives is a necessity.

"Learn to embrace your unique introvert qualities and tap into the happiness they bring you, whether that’s teaching yourself something new, exploring nature on a solo trek, or cultivating your creative side," Carpenter said.

#21

If You Are Thriving Right Now… *what* Is Wrong With You???
twitter/ Adamhill1212

Final score:

511points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Aww, I feel better now! 🤗 Hugs to anyone who needs it today!

130points

katrina hunt Premium 3 years ago

That’s me. Thank you! Back at ya 🙂

14points

Chinmayee Kalghatgi 3 years ago

Thank u so much. My time of month is near and all i did was cry 5 times for reasons i wouldnt normally cry for so i neded that

7points

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

thanks for the thought 🙂🖖🏻to you too

5points

Scagsy 3 years ago

Thanks. And to you! Let's have a Hugathon! If you feel like it maybe you can give a *HUG* in this comment and lets see how much love there is in the world among strangers! Go on, you can do it! *HUG*

5points

Bexxxxx 3 years ago

Thanks Madison, I needed a hug today! :)

3points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

I'm an introvert -I don't hug so a virtual - to all the pandas that need it! Thanks Madison!

2points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Aww! Thanks pandas! 🫂🤗

2points

Mag Swag 3 years ago

thank you, virtual hugs right back at you! 🤗

2points

BORKADYMUSIC 3 years ago

Thank you!!! Hugs to you too!!!

2points

Anton Kider 3 years ago

Thanks Madison. One for you too...

2points

Nul Nemo 3 years ago

/hugs back/ 🤗🌻

1point

Janina Prado 3 years ago

*hugs* to you, as well

1point

Micah Chips 3 years ago (edited)

*hugs you in fluent introvert*

1point

Remi 3 years ago

Don't hug me! Ssst!

0points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

Not having depression is a sign of mental illness.

6points

KimB 3 years ago

Welcome to the "new normal" :)

2points

Smilejustbecause 3 years ago

To my panda family: You guys are so awesome :)

5points

Janina Prado 3 years ago

*hug*

0points

DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago

This makes sooo much sense.

4points

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

too much :)

1point

Iseefractals 3 years ago

I don't get depressed, i just get angry. What depresses me is when i express that anger, and most people respond by calling me an a*****e simply because they don't like being confronted with the reality that they're complicit in facilitating all the things they endlessly whine about.

3points

Robert Thompson 3 years ago

And anger is an appropriate response too. Not everyone who gets angry needs to be medicated or go to anger management.

2points

ohjojo 3 years ago

I just said to my doctor today that based on everything that's going on around me, being depressed is the appropriate response.

2points

PiscesMama 3 years ago

I have to make this distinction to my doctor, I’m not depressed, I’m having a reasonable reaction to some horrible stuff. It would be weird if I wasn’t miserable.

2points

bob bruce 3 years ago

Depression is just proof that you have a good grasp of reality.

1point

L.a. Williams 3 years ago

Exactly.

1point

#22

Let’s Circle Back In The New Year
@introvertsquad

Final score:

505points

POST

September 3 years ago

Recovery days are important. Always schedule recovery days 😎👍

108points

Who Panda 420 3 years ago

The sad thing is I need two recovery days for every activity or I will get sick. Really. I have circular vomiting syndrome and it is awful!

5points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

Usually 30 days apart - don't call for answer, if not contacted answer is no!

2points

CharliAnn Olney Premium 3 years ago

Especially for chronic illness

0points

Big Blue Cat 3 years ago

I was on vacation for a week with my friend. Whole week stuck with another person, every day breakfast, lunch and dinner with bunch if strangers and chatty waiters. It was fun and all but now I need at least couple of weeks to recover. My parents were plant-sitting at my house during the holiday so they were here when I got back. My mom said "you can't wait to get some alone time, do you?"

8points

The Penguin Bandit 3 years ago

Only 3 days? Try a week. Or if you're particularly taxing on my patience, a month.

5points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

Social interactions are like hyperbeam or roar of time... It is very effective but you need a recovery period before you can make a move again.

3points

Gin Sutaraito 3 years ago

Exactly!

1point

Id row 3 years ago

I need so much decompression time after an outing or get together.

2points

Joe Reaves 3 years ago

I am lucky, I have friends that understand this. Also friends who understand the warning of 'I'm changing my meds so be prepared for me to be batshit insane for the next month until they kick in'

2points

Kris 3 years ago

Never two days in a row!

1point

Brittany Lamb 3 years ago

I've pushed and gone hard for days....epic shutdown commenced

1point

Chris Osborn 3 years ago

I leave my phone on "do not disturb" as least 5 days a week, maybe more.

1point

Awsomemom52 3 years ago

I was an introvert during my adolescence... a total bookworm, and I really enjoyed my "quiet time". However, I didn't have that luxury very often, because there were 9 family members living in our house. I had that one friend, who really understood me (similar living situation). When she asked me, if I want to hang out and I answered simply with: no, not today... she didn't even ask, why not. She just accepted it. I miss that

0points

GramDB 3 years ago

I want 2 weekends every week!

0points

#23

I Get Emails From 23 And Me From Time To Time Telling Me They’ve Found New Dna Relatives. The First Few Times I Was Excited, Then I Realized I Avoid 90% Of My Family Already… Why Add To That List?
twitter/ Trevshow

Final score:

483points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Hey that's how my family found half of its current living relatives!

57points

Kay blue 3 years ago

I can't stand most of my relatives, I don't need any more that I have to avoid.

10points

CrunChewy McSandybutt 3 years ago

That is not an argument for it, Madison.

5points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

Sometimes a simple will gets the response you want!

2points

Marilyn leger 3 years ago

estrranged much?

-2points

Helen Haley 3 years ago

Mostly hoped there was someone better in my ancestors than in my current relatives.

12points

Kiem Gallagher 3 years ago

In my case I was very interested because as it turns out my family used to be uber wealthy and I couldn't believe it because these days we're very middle class, where did all the money go if they were that wealthy? I just HAD to know, who f****d it up for the rest of us.

7points

Call Me Mars 3 years ago

I'm black and adopted, and I want to connect with my ancestry and roots because I am not as connected as I want to be.

6points

Chancey 3 years ago

Hopefully a DNA test will give you some answers. I love researching my past. Good luck.

2points

Jasam Nitko 3 years ago

I had a cousin I didn't know existed contact me on FaceBook a couple of years ago, and that's how I ended up deleting my account.

6points

Bob Standen 3 years ago

Did the ancestry DNA test and found out my dad had seeded the entire East Coast of Australia.

5points

ephemeral_mochi 3 years ago

???????

0points

KT 3 years ago

Feel like since my brother died I just don't have it in my to find out if I have more family somewhere, I'm just broken inside

2points

Carole Reid 3 years ago

He must have been a great person. So sorry for your loss.

2points

MrFoxNews 3 years ago

Someone finally got it!

2points

Om 3 years ago

a friend from college recently found a lost brother her parents gave up for adoption more than 30 years ago thanks to an ancestry test. I don't know the details about why they gave him up for adoption, or if my friend knew this beforehand, but at least for him this brought a sense of closure since all his life he wanted to find out his origins, but his adoptive parents weren't given any info about his real family. He took the test and nothing happened, but coincidentally, she took the test too some time later, and she was notified she had a match in the database, so close that it must be her sibling, and that's how they connected.

2points

Id row 3 years ago

This. I have no desire to go looking for other people I'm related to.

2points

#24

This Just In… We’re *fckd*
@ramblinma

Final score:

483points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

*Proceeds to give the box to the cat.*

102points

QibliOfTheSandWings 3 years ago

ALWAYS give the box to the cat. It’s the law

19points

Daniel Marsh 3 years ago

Best part: *Cat manages to eat pizza without opening box.*

11points

Christoph 3 years ago

My cat loves a pizza box! Twice I've tried to buy a new one and both times they would not do it. Its her favorite bed,

3points

Chancey 3 years ago

My cat doesn't like boxes. Craziest thing ever.

2points

Bacony Cakes 3 years ago

Now you have a greasy cat.

2points

Mad Dragon 3 years ago

Clearly a joke. Even the box is laughing.

11points

T. D. Bostick 3 years ago

You mean you're not supposed to suck the pizza through that hole in the box?

8points

Tacos Are Tasty 3 years ago

When I saw "for external use only" on a curling iron box.

5points

Queerios 3 years ago

Crap I was doing it wrong this whole time

4points

The Chosen One 3 years ago

omg I love your username

2points

SCamp 3 years ago

Well ‘Contents may be hot’ on hot coffee cups is up there but probably ‘May contain nuts’ on a packet of nuts takes it

3points

Id row 3 years ago

I would like to meet the person that necessitated that warning. I have questions.

3points

L.a. Williams 3 years ago

So many dumb labels that should be obvious. Yet we keep having the stupid people intrude in our lives. Although it is kinda funny. You know some idiot tried that stupid thing.

2points

Mike Rodrick 3 years ago

Warning on windshield sunblock. "DO NOT DRIVE WHEN IN USE."

1point

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

What and deny my body all that roughage!

1point

But when you feel like leaving your safe little cave, own it. "Particularly when you are already going to be socializing, act the part of an extrovert," Carpenter suggested.

"This doesn't mean you should be inauthentic. Just bring more of your real self. Be an extroverted introvert. Harness that rich inner world of yours and jump into the conversation more, share your opinion, crack a joke, and take the spotlight every once in a while."

#25

It’s A No From Me, Dog
@oldredtree

Final score:

475points

POST

Kim Blizzard 3 years ago

Why would one even arrange and alcohol-free sing-along?!?

10points

Mia D 3 years ago

Covid pandemic is terrible, but it ( and some red marker) saved me from a couple of family gathering I didn't want to go to. And yes, I am very introverted and do not feel like explaining to 20+ people why I do not have children and other stuff like that.

4points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Remember to colour inside the lines boys and girls.

3points

Amanda 3 years ago

I thought it was a pregnant test at first 🤦‍♀️

2points

Bex 3 years ago

I saved my positive at home Covid test in case I need it to get out of a future event lol

2points

Yort 3 years ago

You could just say no?

1point

Kaylee Radcliff 3 years ago

Easy way of not hurting anybody's feelings

4points

julie son 3 years ago

I'm guessing it was alcohol free because they were into heavier drugs...?

1point

Pinkpanda 3 years ago

I like where your head is at

1point

Sophie Prest 3 years ago

i'd just say no

0points

Unaffected 3 years ago

What a great idea!

0points

Stan Chung 3 years ago

hahahahaha

0points

#26

But Then I Realize That At This Point, If I Haven’t Figured Out That Many Do Not In Fact Have Common Sense, Then Maybe It Is Me Who Is Lacking In Common Sense And I’m Making Myself Mad? I’m Going To Bed.
@flixpink

Final score:

474points

POST

phil blanque 3 years ago

Odd that we call it "common" when, actually, it is quite uncommon.

142points

RandomX123 3 years ago

If it was an in-game item it would have a purple/gold border

11points

Miss Cris 3 years ago (edited)

The least common of all senses.

4points

Teresa Spanics 3 years ago

That is why I call it Uncommon Sense.

3points

vglw 3 years ago

Too True and yet it still can surprise me.

3points

Talia Mclaren 3 years ago

it is

1point

Emily Barnes 3 years ago

Common sense is like deodorant, the people who need it the most don't use it

11points

My O My 3 years ago

Wise words

1point

Adam Zad 3 years ago

My people skills are just fine . It's my tolerance for idiots that needs work.

4points

Njushka 3 years ago

This is me. Glad I'm not alone.

1point

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

My positive trait is that I don't expect anything from people, so I'll never get mad, hurt or disappointed.

3points

PopscotchM 3 years ago

have you ever been playing Exquisite Corpse and someone draws the head in the second section? you can't complain.

1point

LadyEncredible Rand 3 years ago

Ok this one is definitely me. I'm truly trying to work on it, but honestly I've always had this issue. Like I truly do now understand how society and humans just can't get certain concepts.

1point

Ogre Juan 3 years ago

"Common Sense........Isn't"

1point

Angela Gardin 3 years ago

You know they took cursive off the curriculum

1point

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

I feel this with intensity

1point

Awsomemom52 3 years ago

Dumb people are so exhausting!

0points

#27

It Is 6° Out And I’m Going Back To Bed #toodaloo
@stuartfiddle_

Final score:

470points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Kind of like the things we all should be doing right now, but here we are reading BoredPanda.

196points

Jon S. 3 years ago

Sssh! Stop reminding me!

12points

𝙸'𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚘𝚘𝚋!(new account) 3 years ago

download-1...85803.jpeg

8points

J.L. Martin 3 years ago

Shh. Leave me deep in denial please. Oh, look! Something shiny! *wanders off*

6points

Summer Mason 3 years ago

Yup. I'm over adulting today

3points

-Straw- 3 years ago

yes!

3points

Norma 3 years ago

Actually, exactly like that.

3points

Wise beauty 3 years ago

HOMEWOOOORRRRKK

2points

Bouk Book 3 years ago

No thank you! I do not need reminding of my life currently.

2points

Brandy Dor 3 years ago

Shhhhhhh.....just let sleeping dogs lie and read on!

2points

The Chosen One 3 years ago

Not fair! Math homework is the worst!

2points

Max Thompson 3 years ago

I'm in school

2points

Bored 3 years ago

Reading BoredPanda is the thing I'm scheduled to do today. Win!

1point

Firestorm Glow 3 years ago

Homework~

0points

Nul Nemo 3 years ago

Good gracious, stop looking at me!!🙈

0points

SOPHIA SAFFARAS 3 years ago

HOW TF DID YOU KNOW?! no but seriously lol

0points

CharliAnn Olney Premium 3 years ago

YES!

0points

Erik Lawrence 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Kathryn Baylis 3 years ago

Or, you plan to spend X number of hours doing something, but every time you plan to go and start doing it, something else needs to be done, then something else, and so on, and you look at the clock, and find that all the other crap that came up out of the blue has eaten up nearly all the time you planned to use to do that one original thing you intended carve out time to do.

4points

Whowhatwherewhy? 3 years ago

And you sat the laundry basket on top of the washing machine to do that one little thing that caught your eye. It'll still be there in the morning until and if I get back to it ever

1point

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

I just got a letter from my government that once again I have to give up 10 minutes of my life to do my taxes. Where's my freedom? ;)

4points

Robert Thompson 3 years ago

It is always like: Time to pee, time to eat, time to turn over to avoid bed sores. Can just have a day to rest.

3points

veveve 3 years ago

I'm working and always make some time to read BoredPanda, just 10-15 mins, 1-2 times a day. Not because I'm lazy or neglecting my job, but coz trully need it. After an intense meeting or working on presentation material, docs etc,, taking a break n reading BP just makes my head lighter and brings better mood

2points

Norah Reilly Premium 3 years ago

Try caregiving, that'll really rot yer socks.

2points

Chancey 3 years ago

82 year old mother with dementia.

0points

DetongLhamo 3 years ago

Having to go to the toilet and also brushing my teeth.

1point

Monty Is Fiennes 3 years ago

Me...

1point

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

I had to do something yesterday, and I'm not finished yet!

1point

Luther von Wolfen 3 years ago

When I was 17, I listened to Husker Du a lot. Their song "Tired Of Doing Things" really spoke to me.

1point

#28

Equal Parts Bleak And Accurate
@kateharding

Final score:

470points

POST

MagicalUnicorn 3 years ago

relatable

89points

Brandy P 3 years ago

I'm considered smart and I weep for humanity.

11points

Adele Xie 3 years ago

and i am not smart enough to understand.

8points

Om 3 years ago

as a non native speaker, it took me a while to understand, but by reading the comments in here and on the actual Tweet, I think she means she thinks she's not that smart, yet it haunts her to know there are SO many people much stupider than she is. Like, she considers she should be at the lower side of the smartness chart, so there shouldn't be that many people less smart than her, but there are, LOTS of them lol

10points

Walter Brameld 3 years ago

Remember the bell curve. If you're of average intelligence, then half the population is stupider than you are, and about 16% (roughly 1 in 6!) are SIGNIFICANTLY stupider.

7points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Every time I have a bad moment, I think of the people out there whose lamps hold a lower wattage than mine!

7points

Iseefractals 3 years ago

The absolute dead center average human being is a complete moron, half of humanity isn't much smarter, and the other half is exponentially dumber. 10% of the population is so stupid the government won't even accept them into being cannon fodder for the armed forces. You need a special license to drive a forklift....yet everyone can reproduce at will, and all of them get to vote.

3points

Max Thompson 3 years ago

Why i don't go out in public

3points

Gregg Bender 3 years ago

Just imagine how the extremely smart and the geniuses feel...

2points

Stan Chung 3 years ago

thankfully not smart enough to imagine it

0points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

god must love stupid people - he made so many of them!

1point

Daniel Lesnick 3 years ago

What haunts me is that most of them wear that stupidity like a hard earned badge of honor.

1point

In fact, studies, where introverts were instructed to act like extroverts in a group of people, showed they ended up experiencing greater positive emotion than introverts acting normally (in fact, they rated their positive emotion higher than the naturally extroverted people, too) and reported feeling more authentic at the moment.

#29

I’m Gna Live *forever*
@hottestdana

Final score:

455points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

This is my life. (I still haven't left my house yet this year!)

76points

Iggy 3 years ago

You're missing nothing!

14points

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

There is nothing outside but people 😕

11points

Bron 3 years ago

Jealous!

2points

Gini Sarver 3 years ago

i don’t wanna ever leave my 🏡

2points

KT 3 years ago

I only leave for groceries every 3 weeks

2points

Max Thompson 3 years ago

Actually...

1point

Marilyn leger 3 years ago

I wonder how long I can get away with the covid excuse for avoiding people

0points

K Witmer 3 years ago

I got Covid after my moms funeral. It was the only time I really left the house last year. I couldn't keep my mask on the whole time it was impossible. Some of my family are antivaxxers and I was so upset they gave people Covid. Everyone that came was supposed to be vaccinated but I found out later they weren't. Ultimate betrayal. Elderly people were there like my stepdads mom. Thank god she didn't get it. Can't believe the utter selfishness from my moms own sisters.

16points

I’m A Black Cat 3 years ago

I'm sorry for your loss

4points

Dee Lee 3 years ago

I am sorry for your mother's loss, and that you got sick. But please understand the vax can be dangerous for some people with certain health conditions - don't lose love for your family over their choice to not vax, and to say goodbye to their sister. Hope they were masked at least!. Even vaccinated people can get and transmit covid!

0points

CultOfBambi 3 years ago

Sorry for your loss - and for your inconsiderate aunties.

0points

Susan Wilson 3 years ago

All around me, more people are dying and in the hospital yet restrictions are being lifted. I'm still acting like we did when the pandemic first started and we took it way more seriously than we needed to.

4points

Izzy_ 3 years ago

Nice to know I'm not the only one that feels it's too soon to lift restrictions

2points

Id row 3 years ago

Yup. Sad thing is that my life hasn't even changed since all this started. It's too peopley out there.

4points

Devil's Advocate 3 years ago (edited)

Why did people need to be told not to get all up in other people's space? 2m space is called polite, not virus protection

3points

The Penguin Bandit 3 years ago

Indeed. I think you're an introvert level 100 if you can avoid getting Omicron (where's my award)

3points

Brandy Grote 3 years ago

I only go to the dr. For 2 years, that's about it...

2points

Raccoon Queen 3 years ago

Lucky, I have in person school that I have to go to, they aren’t offering my programs online (IBMYP) where I live 😫

0points

Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago

I would have agreed with this 3 months ago when SA had less than 500 Covid cases in total, the WHOLE pandemic. But since end of November to Beginning of February we have now had over 120,000 cases and I know 8 people personally who have just had Covid. Now it's just the waiting game for us to get it.

2points

Mohammad Ammar 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Christine Jemison 3 years ago

EXACTLY😊

1point

Scarlett 3 years ago

Ha, only reason I got covid was because my dad brought it home in March of 2020 (he’s a essential worker, he couldn’t stay home)

1point

#30

Omg, I Have This
twitter/ Daphnekylee

Final score:

442points

POST

ChimeraBubbles 3 years ago

My behaviour makes so much more sense to me now. Wow.

130points

DuchessDegu 3 years ago

Yep, that's me

11points

Honu 3 years ago

Yes. Since hearing this term I couldn't help but notice that the days I felt so driven to do this were the days that I had been totally exhausted taking care of other people's needs and he very little alone time.

4points

Otter 3 years ago

That explains SO much of my childhood!

3points

LucyLuLuu 3 years ago

This

0points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

How ironic, I just recently learned about this! I finally figured out why I'm always up all night long (such as right now).

11points

ZAPanda 3 years ago

every night

7points

K Witmer 3 years ago

I have this

6points

The Penguin Bandit 3 years ago

Just think, our subconscious chooses to do this. Not us. Man is my subconscious a drama queen.

6points

Connie Martin 3 years ago

I prefer "compensatory bedtime procrastination." You are compensating for a deficiency of me time, not getting revenge on something or someone. Who/what would be the target of such "revenge"?

5points

Whatthedeuce? 3 years ago

We'll said!

0points

Jen T 3 years ago

I do this every friggin night. I’m tired, but I can’t stop.

4points

TXT_is love 3 years ago

Why do I feel like they are describing me.

4points

Susan Wilson 3 years ago

There are also those who sleep most of the day and stay up most of the night to avoid people who expect them to do something, There is little expectation of productivity in the middle of the night so not as much guilt.

3points

My O My 3 years ago

All parents ever

3points

#31

Icon Status
@_itsteekay

Final score:

427points

POST

ElenaK 3 years ago

Is your uncle a cat?

177points

AmmoniteCat 3 years ago

A cat would never respond to a text.

23points

Sith Ramen 3 years ago

he is uncle socks

5points

lara 3 years ago

No, cats have staff to handle that.

4points

Andy Hinds 3 years ago

His name is Tom.

0points

Marilyn leger 3 years ago

oh yeah!

0points

Nicole 3 years ago

I have an uncle that does the same thing and I use to think it was strange when I was a kid. Then adulthood hit and I got it.

7points

Karis Ravenhill 3 years ago

Your uncle's a genius.

5points

Robert Thompson 3 years ago

Teach me your ways master.

3points

E B 3 years ago

Life goals!

3points

L.a. Williams 3 years ago

I like it

1point

Bobby 3 years ago

What about the father who hasn't replied yet? Do they have father's contact#? Who's the father?

1point

Jaithesaint 3 years ago

This is me. Currently. No wonder my nephews love me lol. I just pop up

1point

Matthew Howard 3 years ago

me too

1point

Georgie 3 years ago

So we're all the same here

0points

#32

I’m Going To Just Send This Out To The L Host Of Every Meeting On My Calendar For The Rest Of The Year ✌️
@rjstrodel

Final score:

427points

POST

adiiantryx 3 years ago

this should be at the top

90points

Vee Dub 3 years ago

but then Keanu wouldn't be on top ...

2points

Erik Lawrence 3 years ago

thats why there are vote buttons.

1point

Sea otter simone 3 years ago

fr

0points

Bella shepley 3 years ago

Upvoted

0points

Dietcocoabean 3 years ago

So she is accustomed to actually having control of the day? Who knew that was a thing?

4points

Coco 3 years ago

Soooooooo relatable lmaoooo

2points

SCamp 3 years ago

Got an email from a student once that said ‘I am outside the Universe and there’s no button to get in.’ He meant ‘university’ but I thought, I hear you bud, I hear you.

2points

Mike Rodrick 3 years ago

"I have lost control of the day." Perfect bumper sticker.

1point

Remi 3 years ago

I feel this

0points

Friend Kelli 3 years ago

My new favorite thing

0points

Lynn Morello 3 years ago

Respond with, Hi friend, I can bring the Coffee and Cake to you, just tell me where.

0points

Susan Williams 3 years ago (edited)

As I've aged, I have lost contol over my life.

0points

GramDB 3 years ago

Only the day?

0points

There are plenty of ways to go about it. "If you're not socializing much, encourage yourself to connect with others in the ways that work well for you," the psychology coach said.

"Join a group to take part in an activity you already love, like a choir, book club, or fitness class. Even though initiating these decisions may feel like an extra effort, the payoff should be noticeable. When you realize you acted more extroverted in a way that felt good, keep it up."

Whatever happens in these settings, you will always be able to retreat and find memes to scroll through instead!

#33

#lifegoals

Final score:

426points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago (edited)

I aspire to be this much of a character in my senior years.

145points

advice5cents 3 years ago

Squirrel is 100% on board

11points

InfectedVoice 3 years ago

Please protect this woman at all costs.

10points

R Carson 3 years ago

SWEET!

6points

J&B FitzTubeKidz 3 years ago

How would this have anything to do with being an introvert? Lol

5points

madbakes 3 years ago

It doesn't but damnit if I don't love it

7points

KimB 3 years ago

This is hands down the cutest thing I've seen all day :)

4points

E B 3 years ago

This is wonderful.

4points

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

cute and clever :)

4points

ElenaK 3 years ago

Detachment level 2.0

3points

Sooploosh MacSchnibble 3 years ago

one day, a squirrel is going to maul that.

1point

#34

*spends 3 Hours On Google Maps Assessing And Memorising Parking Situation*
@ali_jordan1

Final score:

423points

POST

The only Plueschopossum 3 years ago

When it comes to unknown parking situations I'm ALWAYS nervous. Especially in busy inner-city areas. That's why I love my bike...

85points

rumade 3 years ago

But then bike anxiety! Will there be something the right dimensions to chain it to? Will it be stolen? 😭

11points

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

I'm just always nervous. Anything new sends me into a panic. But i hide my near heart attack, heavy breathing, going to puke, PTSD dizzy spell by saying 'I'm grand, it will be grand '

4points

Kathryn Baylis 3 years ago

And public transportation. Unfortunately, I live in a rather rural area, so must use my car. So it’s good there aren’t any large cities with inadequate parking within 100 miles of me. I guess.

1point

Amaranthim Talon 3 years ago

I hate going downtown. I live in the burbs and the idea of being in a cityscape setting gives me anxiety. NVM parking- I will take the Metro if I must go downtown. Then I will ride in fear the whole time of missing my exit. Then I will get off at my destination- terrified I got off wrong... And now, I have anxiety talking about an excursion I have zero need of taking-

0points

Mike Rodrick 3 years ago

Why would that happen when I don't leave the house?

0points

KimB 3 years ago

I'd absolutely love to ride my bike more but honestly people here just scare me! They're on their phones or playing with their radios not looking for pedestrians and bikers...motorcycles too it's risky I've seen so many accidents :(

0points

Ayra 3 years ago

I always check google street view to get hints on the parking situation...

13points

The only Plueschopossum 3 years ago

Same here! :D

1point

Lillian Swaim 3 years ago

I can't tell you how many times I've given up and gone home in tears after driving around lost for an hour downtown because I couldn't find the correct parking entrance. Like, how do you pull over and look it up on your phone when there is no where to pull over other than the wrong place that charges you 15$ just to get in?

10points

Flash Henry 3 years ago

Also anxiety thinking about the potential bathroom situation.

6points

Id row 3 years ago

Driving anywhere outside of my routine places sends me into a tailspin.

5points

ThatGuv 3 years ago

I Street View a new location to the max...

4points

Purple Gerbil 3 years ago

Yes!!!! I Google street view for reassurance

3points

Mindghost 3 years ago

Thank god for google street view

3points

Kirsten Kerkhof 3 years ago

It is absolutely the only worry I have. I am fine going to strange locations as long as I know where to park my car and how to get to that parking lot. I do a fair number of shows in big arenas and staff parking can be impossible to find. Such worries!

2points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Anxiety over parking is the "normal"

2points

#35

Passionate About Non Fiction Literature

Final score:

412points

POST

ChimeraBubbles 3 years ago

I am feeling the first two for sure!

53points

Sawyer Kidder 3 years ago

I feel all of them!

14points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Am I crazy or just tired: The Footnotes.

10points

StayClassy 3 years ago

Why Did I Say That: Reliving Past Conversations on a Loop

9points

Ashbug 3 years ago

Glad to know I'm not the only one

1point

Rain.coffee.exe 3 years ago

Is that headache caused by lack of sleep or lack of liquids: the prequel

6points

Kimi Tomminello 3 years ago

Hey look it's my morning checklist

6points

Otter 3 years ago

I'm lazy *and* depressed! They're different! The depressed is what it is, but on top of that I just philosophically disagree with spending half one's life at unnecessary domestic labor. I've arranged my whole life to minimize it.

4points

Sophie Prest 3 years ago

i'm all

1point

nightmare 1 3 years ago

I'm the trilogy

1point

Arenite 3 years ago

Physically Ill, both lazy and depressed, and yes everybody hates me.

1point

KimB 3 years ago

The older I get the less I seem to care what other people think of me. I'm like yeah I suck, we all suck...move on

1point

#36

*randomly Meows*
(Gierlsquad/ Helenasund)

Final score:

411points

POST

September 3 years ago

Agree. Never appreciate them and also not any good at giving them because I feel like who the f am I to be judging anyone and throwing critiques at them. Always told my immediate supervisors, no praise needed, just throw money

58points

Adam Zad 3 years ago

50s accepted, 100s preferred.

1point

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago (edited)

In Ireland we love to compliment but are awful at accepting them. If someone tells you 'i like your dress' the response is 'this thing, the state of it , sure its only cheap, i only threw it on myself this morning' etc etc. It could still have labels on it but it's just what we do. Now if someone gives a compliment and someone says thanks well, you would be labelled a poser, full of notions about yourself, big headed and probably foreign. 🙂 Irish people are all about the modesty

9points

KimB 3 years ago

I've notice the Irish folks tend to downplay their illness and pain as well! I ask do you have any discomfort during stress tests, Irish patient ah no, I'm just fine. I literally ask at least 3 times depending on length of the time on the treadmill. Irish patient later tells the doctor they had a wee bit of pain in their chest when they were on the treadmill . ( facepalm ) : D

2points

Whowhatwherewhy? 3 years ago (edited)

I enjoy receiving a sincere compliment. I enjoy giving sincere compliments almost as much!

2points

Auntriarch 3 years ago

Looks like it's just you and me

3points

Micah Chips 3 years ago

"...and I would like to add, you are looking STUNNING today."

2points

Nancy Doughty 3 years ago

XD

1point

Emily Barnes 3 years ago

Honestly same

2points

Nancy Doughty 3 years ago (edited)

Is Thank you, that's kind of you to say," really that hard? Yeah, I'm old.

2points

Joe Das 3 years ago

I've learnt (with great effort) to force a "thank you" and hope they stop talking.

4points

Kel_how 3 years ago

I've learned to just thank the person and move on with life. Whether I deserve the compliment or not, we're all happier for just accepting it; some people just really love complimenting others. Also, introvert bonus, "thank you" is fewer words than any argument.

1point

Little Phoenix 3 years ago

And when you give something back, it just gets stuck.

1point

Joanne Hudson 3 years ago

Screenshot...6907be.jpg

0points

Crycket 3 years ago

Think of compliments as a physical gift. It helps. When someone hands you a gift, you tend to say thank you. A compliment is a verbal gift.

0points

#37

You Mad At Me?
@f41rygff

Final score:

396points

POST

Lord pretzell 3 years ago

Mood

62points

Erik Lawrence 3 years ago

yeah, thats one way to show you have no idea how to use that response.

-3points

Sawyer Kidder 3 years ago

#abused

8points

Penelope 2 3 years ago

same. my ex. . . we broke up almost a decade ago but yeah. I don't talk to him or like him.

0points

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

Yeah, because being polite costs you no money and gets you a lot further.

3points

Smilejustbecause 3 years ago

I love being kind, even when people are not kind back. You will never make me frown. Try it, I dare you :)

2points

Tami 3 years ago

Or raised in Canada.

2points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

Thanks I was raised - - - properly!

1point

Stephanie Hewitt 3 years ago

I'm Canadian raised by British folks. I felt this one lol

1point

Syd 3 years ago

oh shoot. felt this one hard.

1point

ElenaK 3 years ago

I thought that was only me! Life stance!

1point

Ashbug 3 years ago

Same here I have an alcoholic parent

3points

LucyLuLuu 3 years ago

Don't make a fuss

0points

#38

“Who Has Time For That?” I Mutter To Myself As I Proceed To Sit On The Toilet And Stare At My Phone For Seven And A Half Hours
@djoats02

Final score:

395points

POST

adiiantryx 3 years ago

we all have our coping mechanisms

67points

Aria Gravley 3 years ago

This is mine (reading memes)

0points

ElenaK 3 years ago (edited)

They are actually trying to run away from it...every day!

8points

Linda Gilliam 3 years ago

Anytime my alarm clock goes off, my bed grows arms.

3points

InfectedVoice 3 years ago

I get up at 5am to walk the dogs for 2 hours regularly, I love it.

1point

Ravens Mom 3 years ago

Ditto!

0points

Brobro McDuderson 3 years ago

Positivity counterpoint 🙂: exercise boosts happy chemicals in our body and is a great way to start the day. (I’m not a morning person & exercise at night…but jelly of morning people can who do this).

1point

Cleo Neufeld 3 years ago

Love this!

0points

Lori 3 years ago

Oh, absolutely!

0points

MikeMaxis 3 years ago

No thanks its the coldest time of day anyhow.

0points

Caroline Overill 3 years ago

I have time to exercise in the morning but I heroically fill it with cups of tea and bagels

0points

Amelia Earhart 3 years ago

I'm so glad I'm not the only one waking up that way.

0points

#39

I’m Just Gna Start Shaving My Head. Can’t Take The Small Talk.
@tacko_belle

Final score:

389points

POST

Loty 3 years ago

I preemptively ask them a broad question like "What's your favorite vacation spot" and then just relax and occasionally mutter "oh nice" and "cool"

71points

ToGo 3 years ago

I just let them know, politely of course, that I'm not looking for conversion. I think some of them are glad for the break!

10points

Wistiti 3 years ago

Will try that on saturday

3points

Abrufal 3 years ago

I always start with "got any kids" most parents with a child under 5 will go on about cutness for hours

2points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

I say the obligatory hello and yes and no to their questions but I never initiate conversations!

2points

GoodWolf 3 years ago

I do that, too!

2points

Marilyn leger 3 years ago

Ah, thanks for this new coping tool

1point

bv7hearts 3 years ago

Yoda.

1point

Karis Ravenhill 3 years ago

"I came here for the sleepy feeling I get when someone touches my hair and scalp. We do not need to talk. Thank you, now hop to it Edward Scissorhands!". Solves the problem every time.

6points

MCathenaE 3 years ago

You are my dream client!

1point

Johnny 3 years ago

The best part of the pandemic is that my wife started cutting my hair, and now I don't have to go in to get a haircut every month and try to make small talk with someone I have nothing in common with.

6points

KimB 3 years ago

Lol I have become that wife!

1point

LMW 3 years ago

Mine still talks when the hair dryer is going 😄

6points

Izzy Curer 3 years ago

I haven't been to a hairdresser in years. I can't stand the talking and the touching. I just learned how to do it myself

3points

Kiem Gallagher 3 years ago

Me too, I've been cutting my own hair for a decade.

3points

Lilou S. Pumpkins 3 years ago

"I've been waiting all day for this time to just chill out and relax, thank you so much! I'm gonna pop in my earbuds and if you need me, just give me a little tap." Works like a charm!

2points

PixxelDust 3 years ago

my least favourite part of a haircut is when they blow dry your hair because it's too loud, uncomfortable and hot to think or process anything around you, and their hands are all through your hair.

1point

InfectedVoice 3 years ago

I used to like the feel of the electric shaver on the back of my neck, I used to ask the barber to go over that bit a few times, ooh it feels nice.

1point

XenoMurph 3 years ago (edited)

You should try being a bloke for a while. Enter Barbers "Alright?" "Aye, alright mate, the usual?" "Aye mate" 15 minutes silence. Stand up, "Keep the change" Exit.

1point

Brendan Roberts 3 years ago

That used to be the case for me. None of my barbers made conversation. I could just sit back and enjoy the ride. But they've hired a chatterbox, who has kindly pointed out to me how quiet I am.

1point

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

Best part about having alopecia. I don't miss that 'are you going anywhere on your holidays ' chat. I used to wash my hair at home so i had less time in the shop.

1point

#40

Off You Go
@solomongeorgio

Final score:

371points

POST

Peej Maybe 3 years ago

Early on in the pandemic a woman (typical Karen-ish Anti-Masker) asked me why I moved so far out of her way while walking down the pavement towards her and I said "Oh it has nothing to do with COVID, I would've done it anyway"

171points

Spikey boi 3 years ago (edited)

I'd say call an ambulence for that burn but she'll probably be fine with her essential oils

30points

1010011 1001110 3 years ago

*Claps*

5points

Ogre Juan 3 years ago

Burn Salve Heeded !

3points

Glynna Bowood 3 years ago

Balls.

2points

GPZ 3 years ago

Yeah, I moved out of your way because I didn't want to catch "stupid" from you

1point

Erica Cochrane 3 years ago

early on as well, mum & i were walking the dog. we passed this elderly man, so stepped onto the road (no cars) to keep our distance (he was like 80+, maybe even closer to 90) and he asked us if the dog was vicious, we said no, he's actually very friendly, we were just trying to keep our distance, he asked us why. then proceeded to tell us how all he does is sit in the house watching the news and other tv all day. which is sad, but also, if you watch the news all day, how, in march 2020 did you not know about social distancing?!

1point

Aussie Bloke 3 years ago

Nice :)

0points

InfectedVoice 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

September 3 years ago

That's all my neighbors. Y'all just stay away or it's going to become a "It's always the quiet ones" situation on national news 🤨

10points

Perfumista Perfumista 3 years ago

Have you considered Finland?

4points

Zoe Vokes 3 years ago

I’ve always socially distanced. Never hugged and kissed people. I was never social. And always washed my hands frequently and hand sanitised after touching money and door handles. Not much change in my behaviour

1point

Louise Rexford Wolfram 3 years ago

I love social distancing!!

1point

Andy Hinds 3 years ago (edited)

I have a T-shirt that says "I've been social distancing since long before it was fashionable". It's true.

0points

backatya 3 years ago

LMAO

0points

Jeff Rhodes 3 years ago

I want that on a tee shirt

0points

L.a. Williams 3 years ago

Yes what is it when waiting in line people think they can intrude on my personal space. Stop breathing on me when I can tell what the last you ate was.

0points

Anne Roberts 3 years ago

Love this! 😆

0points

#41

What 👏🏻 Is 👏🏻 The 👏🏻 Reason 👏🏻 Tho 👏🏻
@ryanaboyd

Final score:

370points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

A coincidence I say!

58points

Tee Witt 3 years ago

Personally I think it is a direct result of the billionaires whose constant greed requires them to disregard people or the planet in their constant need to add more to their stack of money.

7points

adiiantryx 3 years ago

'probably those darn new phones'

6points

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

It's the video games, people smoking drugs and porn.

3points

Joe Das 3 years ago

Capitalism!

2points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

Boomer:What a bunch of whiney baby's. Me: Said sarcastically by an actual boomer, because they aren't a bunch of whiney babies. They've got way more on their plates than we ever did.

2points

julie son 3 years ago

Totally!

2points

Njushka 3 years ago

Anxiety and depression are just the general state of the population at this point. If you can somehow manage to never be anxious or feel depressed in today's times please tell me your secret.

1point

Dee 3 years ago

Given the context, NEVER being anxious or depressed may not be a realistic goal. A Buddhist perspective would say to welcome whatever feelings come, even ones that we don’t like or want around. It’s all part of the human experience, feelings come and go we don’t have to take them so seriously, we can learn to be kind to ourselves however we happen to be feeling in the moment. Paradoxically the more we resist them the more they persist! All that being said, humour helps too.. I came across this meme the other day that said, ‘You are a ghost driving a meat-covered skeleton made from star dust, riding a rock hurtling through space - fear nothing!’ I love this perspective and it made me laugh. I hope you find peace in this uncertain world.

0points

Owen 3 years ago

There is no other explanation

0points

GPZ 3 years ago

Next you'll be insisting we read the instruction manuals

0points

Thomas Turnbull 3 years ago

The planet is not boiling or you would not be able to write the post joyous just wrote

0points

Mike Rodrick 3 years ago

Welcome to capitalism!

0points

#42

Thanks Mom N Dad @wordsarevibrations

Final score:

357points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

*Elon Musk says excitedly*: boy do I have a mission for you!

91points

Glynna Bowood 3 years ago

Thanks, I needed a good laugh!

4points

CatGirl 3 years ago

Yes, and anyone who wants kids should be forced to look at this until they realize it's a terrible idea

6points

Pinkpanda 3 years ago

Existential dread is my breakfast

3points

Camilla Koutsos 3 years ago

And even then, many can't get a living wage in a 40 hour week, so they have to work 60 or more hours a week.

3points

Olivia Mansfield 3 years ago (edited)

Yep so the rich corporates maintain their lavish lives upon people's slave wages

1point

Béla Kun 3 years ago

I have this book

3points

MellonCollie 3 years ago

What book is this again? The drawing looks so familiar and yet i cannot remember.

1point

C. Wade 3 years ago

Been saying this since I was 14. Like it ain't all bad now that I'm here but I wish somebody told me beforehand.

2points

PandaGoPanda 3 years ago

Oh the nostalgia. Love Richard Scarry.

1point

Iseefractals 3 years ago

Everyone should think about this comment, and then get themselves sterilized.

1point

Olivia Mansfield 3 years ago

THANK YOU!!!!!

0points

Aria Gravley 3 years ago

Easy fix-suicide!

0points

Alexandra Comeau 3 years ago

omg i think this every single day!

0points

#43

It’s Good To Have Purpose, Y’all
@javrawr

Final score:

355points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago (edited)

Now you tell me! It's already the 10th! How can I plan for this without notice???

83points

Gin. No tonic 3 years ago

So you've got 12 days to prepare!

25points

Dark Pigeon 3 years ago

22'sday will be coming up shortly! We still get to do this

4points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

UPDATE: HAPPY 02/22/2022 EVERYONE!! 🥳🙌🏻🎇🎉

3points

Marilyn leger 3 years ago

have an impromp2 gathering

1point

Stannous Flouride 3 years ago

Two ways...

1point

Amaranthim Talon 3 years ago

Well, plenty of time between NAO and 2/22/2222

0points

Scarlett Storm 3 years ago

He meant the 22nd of February. You still got time.

0points

Kathryn Baylis 3 years ago

And in exactly 200 years, we can have 2:22:22 (or 22:22:22 military time) on 2/22/2222. If that day also happens to be a Tuesday, something BIG has got to happen. I mean it. Just can’t let it only be the time and date.

4points

Gin. No tonic 3 years ago

2/2/2222 will be a Saturday, and 22/2/2222 will be a Friday 🙁

2points

Tami 3 years ago

I had a doctor's appointment on 2/22 at 2:20, but it was last year. 😕

3points

Ms. Who 3 years ago

i think that was a Wednesday

2points

Amanda Nolting 3 years ago

That would have been 02/02/2022. They're talking about 02/22/2022. Or 22/02/2022 if that's the format you use. Either way, it's February 22nd they're talking about.

9points

Ethan Lang 3 years ago

I remember 2/2/22, now I’m even more hyped!

2points

Miss Cris 3 years ago

My birthday

1point

Glen Ellyn Premium 3 years ago

I toasted my birthday this year: 2/2/22. 🥂🎈💃🎵

1point

Satan Laughs 3 years ago

This has circulated a billion times already! Every poster claiming to be the one who thought of this lameass meme.

1point

Orange Is Aging 3 years ago

That’s the day NMIXX debuts!!

1point

Debbie Burton 3 years ago

In Australia it was 22.02.2022

0points

Jenný Samúelsdóttir Herlufsen 3 years ago

*2/22/22

0points

#44

Awwww, Try Pullin On Your Bootstraps, Hun
@fredtaming

Final score:

327points

POST

ZAPanda 3 years ago

*fewer aircraft carriers.

127points

Marilyn leger 3 years ago

Yes — and other equipment the military has said (repeatedly) it doesn't need

0points

Tracy Wallick 3 years ago

Navy here, sure would be nice if they'd replace our aging ships, but no. We're not getting that money, contractors are.

0points

Daniel Lesnick 3 years ago

Also, fewer modern fighter jets that exactly zero branches of the US military want/need.

0points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

And avocados! Don't forget avocados!

8points

HarriMissesScotland 3 years ago

This is a bit off top, but the Gov. of Florida, DeathSantis, is with holding 225 million dollars to school systems who have mask mandates. The very next comment was the 25 million the taxpayers will be used to buy 3 private jets for republican officials to use. Not just for flying to DC and back, for family use as well.

6points

ispeak catanese 3 years ago

That man is an abomination.

5points

oddly_informed_raven 3 years ago

I should probably be surprised by this

2points

Remi 3 years ago

Isn't he the one that also thinks letting teens know that queer ppl exist is a bad thing?

0points

Bacony Cakes 3 years ago

Can we use the private jets as target practice for SAM launchers?

0points

Cathulhu 3 years ago

Maybe don't eat avocado toast every morning with your lattes US Gov.

5points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

*fewer tax-payer funded vacay's*

5points

Shannon F 3 years ago

Or just bring our stuff back from the other countries where we fought a war instead of just leaving it! RECYCELE GOVERNMENT!!!

2points

Tee Witt 3 years ago

That is where the billionaires money came from.

1point

Salty Wild Hair 3 years ago

Tell them to stop writing aid bills for other countries that dont actually get the money, but are forced to give said congress person a kickback. Money laundering with tax dollars may one day become one of the worst crimes against humanity, after crimes against children and modern day slavery.

0points

Remi 3 years ago

Usa owes such insane amounts of money that even paying off the intrests is basically impossible. How the heck isn't it bankrupt already is a combination threats and other weird tactics. Sry.

0points

GPZ 3 years ago

*Fewer attempts at interfering in other country's without being asked to

0points

#45

✌️
@stepdaddyangel

Final score:

316points

POST

September 3 years ago

I don't get invited to those and would not go if I did.

43points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

thanks for the good company! I don't go because they usually ask me to leave!

0points

RedFox 3 years ago

The depressed trans cousin with social anxiety and separation anxiety from my cat.

7points

My O My 3 years ago

Your cat could come with you as emotional support animal... Then again. You could stay home with the cat as emotional support human.

1point

Lukas-not-Luca (he/him) 3 years ago

the weird anxious but loud gay one

3points

Firestorm Glow 3 years ago

I'm that crazy cousin that always gets a sugar rush and teaches all the little kids cuss words

2points

J.A. Rogers 3 years ago

I'm that cousin.

2points

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

I was born in a family with very high standards. We never have family gatherings.

2points

My O My 3 years ago

Sounds like a win

0points

Bisexual Tiger 3 years ago

im the gay cousin who avoids all the adults and sticks with the little kids (the adults are notoriously boring)

1point

Craig Prins 3 years ago

Family gatherings? What's that?

1point

Thee8thsense 3 years ago

My family have all passed away, so no gathering anxiety.

1point

BORKADYMUSIC 3 years ago

I’m the gay cousin who got disowned ✨

1point

#46

Normalize Tagging Your Boss In This Specific Meme And That Counting For Calling Out Of Work
@__bhb__

Final score:

312points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Yes that is okay! Validate it, feel it, believe it!!

49points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

Yep it's to peoplely out there!

2points

Thomas Sweda 3 years ago

And they will probably normalize, “We cannot pay you today because you did not work.”

9points

Rage of Aquarius 3 years ago

Except, that's every day and I'd be even more broke.

4points

Kristen Fagerstrom 3 years ago

I will forever bow down to my current boss who, when I said "I can't people today" said, it's ok, we're staffed and you have time saved, go home. And then congratulated me on the decision later. My hero.

3points

Summer Woodsong 3 years ago

One of the partners called in one morning to announce he wasn't coming in that day. "I'm just not feeling it," he said. I aspire to that level of independent income.

1point

Daniel Lesnick 3 years ago

And maybe let's normalize allowing people that thrive under wfh to continue to do so in order to acknowledge the fact that it's isn't wfh that's good for them, it's the aggressively noisy, disruptive office that is toxic to their concentration and productivity.

1point

Pat Bond 3 years ago

Usually called "doing a sickie"

1point

Susan Williams 3 years ago

Once or twice a year, some of us women would go to talk to HR and vent about our unfair treatment. It got so that the bosses, all men, were becoming very nervous when they thought we women might be offended by something.

0points

Mike Rodrick 3 years ago

Boss be like, "you're still coming in today, right?

0points

L.a. Williams 3 years ago

Yes we need that.

0points

#47

I’ve Been Called Worse For Less, Boo. #okaywithbeingselfish
@bonerwizard

Final score:

291points

POST

GoddessOfChaos 3 years ago

You know what is selfish? Bringing children into this mess of a world that we are destroying and doing nothing to help fix it just so they can suffer later on

245points

Olivia Mansfield 3 years ago

Exactly!!! World is very overpopulated, so much abuse poverty crime ,destroying natural habitats

3points

Joe Das 3 years ago

You've said what I was about to write

2points

not your average weirdo 3 years ago

And saying “You will fix the world for us, kids! You're our future!” 🙄

1point

Dee Lee 3 years ago

Remember OctoMom? Good gawd!!!

1point

Owen 3 years ago

YES!!!!

0points

Mike Rodrick 3 years ago

Actually forcing them to interact with the rest of the world.

0points

Faramir10 3 years ago

Yep!

0points

Kickin' Wing 3 years ago

Better to abort them?

-2points

Eagle Girl 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

julie son 3 years ago

From the head of a church who decided in 1331AD that their clergy should become celibate so their worldly possessions would revert to the church, rather than their families! Also, the Dalai Lama said that the biggest problem the world faces today is overpopulation. Guess which one has a clue?

19points

Kiem Gallagher 3 years ago

Pope Francis needs to pipe down, get the insane riches they have hoarded and hid for an eternity in the Vatican's vaults, sell them to stupid rich people, and use the money to FIX this world he wants people to bring more kids into... it's literally falling apart. He also needs to stay out of my uterus, thank you.

12points

Elizabeth Molloy 3 years ago

The animals are already there, they need loving homes. Humans are a pestilence on the planet; we don't need any more!

11points

J.A. Rogers 3 years ago

And why should anyone care about family-planning advice from an old guy who's never had a family of his own?

10points

InfectedVoice 3 years ago

The Catholic Church has no right to comment on kids anymore, they just want to f**k them.

7points

Bri Lancaster 3 years ago (edited)

Ooh, ooh, ooh! [I'm raising my hand because my parents and siblings and I chose furbabies over grandchildren and children, and it's been awesome!!]

7points

Chris Osborn 3 years ago

My Family too, and ours are all rescues as well.

4points

VeninTheNonBinaryRogue 3 years ago

Pets>Kids

6points

Iseefractals 3 years ago

We have 5 cats inside all strays, 4 of which are related and taken in over the course of 10 years, and another 4 that live outside....which are also related to the 4 inside cats and are 20th generation. All 4 of the related kitties are sprawled across me as i'm writing this, despite the fact that they hate each other, they love me more. A child could never, ever bring as much satisfaction or happiness as the previous sentence.

3points

Vinita Talaulikar 3 years ago

I prefer being selfish than burdening the world with over population. What type of world are we giving our children ?

3points

#48

Toodaloo, Fam
@someecards

Final score:

278points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

If only...

55points

Ancsuri 3 years ago

I feel your pain...from my office :(

5points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

Then you are broke, you starve, and you die.

5points

Barbara Weiss 3 years ago (edited)

Not everyone is in that position. You can't speak for all others.

0points

Kathryn Baylis 3 years ago

Sorry Boss, Doctor’s orders.

2points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

Why yes boss I have a medical exemption! BYE!

1point

best turtle 3 years ago

im writing that down

2points

D K 3 years ago

I’m doing that tomorrow - it’s my last day at my current job - onto bigger better things! 🥳

1point

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

GOOD LUCK!

1point

RedMarbles 3 years ago

Love the visual aid tutorial 😅

1point

Annamay 3 years ago

When I was young, 60 years ago, I would go out to lunch and never go back. I was a secretary. There was always another job.

0points

Grace Note Premium 3 years ago

I actually did that once. I'd been working for the company for six years. Got up from my desk one morning, said "No, I'm not doing this anymore." and walked out never to return.

0points

Susan Williams 3 years ago

I advise doing this once or twice a year.

0points

Mike Rodrick 3 years ago

The best thing about retirement. N/A!

0points

#49

Very, Very Concerned #ripbettywhite
@closetoclassy

Final score:

267points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

It's only February and I have my doubts about 2022. I'd like a refund.

89points

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

To qualify for a refund you will have to complete the entire ride. Management can't stress enough that no refunds will be given for frivolous reasons like "I didn't like it." , "Not what I expected." or "Ran out of fücks to give, halfway the ride."

12points

Deson 3 years ago

I think it was Shakespeare who said that 'All life is but a stage with our entrances and exits." (Or something like that). If this is indeed so then I want to talk to the script writer. I want a better part!!

2points

Ogre Juan 3 years ago

Past 5 Years

2points

Mike Rodrick 3 years ago

I didn't buy a planner for this year.

0points

Kirsten Kerkhof 3 years ago

That's because 2022 is pronounced as '2020, too.'

19points

I’m A Black Cat 3 years ago

Only in English. So you can just relocate

1point

Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago (edited)

I'm actually feeling pretty good about 2022. This is gonna be my year. Sorry to sound clichè but New year, New me.

5points

ALEXIS CISNEROS 3 years ago

same, except for my usual mental breakdowns, ive been having a good year so far :D

3points

Karis Ravenhill 3 years ago

Dude i'm sitting here petrified that God is going to say "well, I took one golden bell this year, maybe I should knock two off" and his hand reaches towards Dolly Parton. DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH HER, GOD, WE CAN'T DO WITHOUT HER YET!

4points

KimB 3 years ago

My local news station said she's now offering tuition assistance to ALL her Dollywood employees starting from their first day! She's amazing and so classy! :)

2points

Rae Black 3 years ago

No, it means she hung with us through 2020 and 2021 because she knew we needed her.

3points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

Thought this was finally going to be a great year. Then I lost my best friend of 51 years in January. I'm skipping the rest of this good for nothing fn year.

3points

KimB 3 years ago

I'm so sorry for your loss :(

2points

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

Well I think Betty White was to classy for this statement. She would have tried to help us all!

1point

InfectedVoice 3 years ago

RIP Betty.

1point

bv7hearts 3 years ago

Then my cat died four days in. 2022 can go suck a big one.

1point

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

My Lucy died in 2017 and my heart will always be shattered. So many people don't understand how very painful the loss of a pet is. I am so sorry. Hugs.

2points

Raven DeathShade 3 years ago

That sucks :/. Mine died in September of last year at 16. We join hands in solidarity.

2points

KimB 3 years ago

I'm so very sorry for your losses :(

1point

Emily Barnes 3 years ago

Yes, be very concerned

1point

#50

*leaps Onto Passing Boat*
@imnotscottyshire

Final score:

208points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Just be a bleached almond like the rest of us, huh? Then people just comment on bare skin exposure instead of bare skin with ink.

26points

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

Bleached almond! Look at you with your lovely colour. I'm Irish we are pale blue.

9points

CanidaeVulpes 3 years ago

I’d love to be bleached almond. I’m range from pale pink to beet red. No lovely blushing for me

1point

Brian Bennett 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Timothy Jamelli 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Yoga Kitty 3 years ago

If I got 1€ everytime somebody feels the need to comment on my pale skin colour I would have free ice cream all summer long. Maybe I should get a tattoo instead? Perhaps one that reads "No, I don't have to go outside more - I already had more than my fair share of sunburns!"?

3points

Mermaid Elle-Jaye 3 years ago (edited)

I’m so glad I never did, I would of done it in my goth era, so now I’d be a pretty pink mermaid covered in tattoos of decomposing road kill I found and the taxidermy I did and a bit of human decomposition . Which still sounds pretty in my head but for normal society, I wouldn’t be able to do my current job 😂

2points

Bettie-Jean Neal 3 years ago

How about the people who think it's ok to just come up and touch them? Good way to get punched in the throat.

1point

KimB 3 years ago

I've seen a lot of tattoos on my older patients...makes me happy it's not such a social taboo anymore...piercings on the other hand get some attention from this population (I'm talking 75 years old plus)...I had a coworker with pink hair, lip, eyebrow, and gaged earlobes...I heard some pretty rude comments thrown at her (pre-Covid no mask) like " you'd be so much prettier with out all that crap in your face"

1point

Friend Kelli 3 years ago

Beautiful warning.

0points

Bevo Nostro 3 years ago

Ha. You think tat chat is bad, try using your prehensile tail even once at the grocery store...

0points

Beth Kramer 3 years ago

So relatable! I’ve learned now that when I go for a massage now I preemptively say ‘ Im really tired so I probably won’t respond if you talk to me.”

0points

InfectedVoice 3 years ago

People don't care about tattoos anymore, people hardly even see them like they did once, blah.

0points

Bexxxxx 3 years ago

Exactly! My coworker said to me yesterday, “I’m not getting tattoos. I want to be different, not like everyone else.” I was like bruh. No one cares any more whether you do or don’t have them. (Also, not having tattoos doesn’t make him different so idek lmao)

0points

Lord Mysticlaw 3 years ago

I identify with this too much.

0points

#51

I’ve Never Been More Down For A Group Activity
@sketchesbyboze

Final score:

72points

POST

Lord pretzell 3 years ago

I‘m down. Let me go get my cardigan

29points

Kirsten Kerkhof 3 years ago (edited)

Joining you with my knitting project and my fat cat!

10points

MotherofGuineaPigs 3 years ago

I'll be right over and I'll up your cat with a guinea pig!

5points

Mer☕️🧭☕️ 3 years ago

Oh my way - will bring cookies/biscuits decaf tea - we know about your high blood pressure, Margaret.

0points

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

yeeeeeees, miss marple club ! :D

3points

GoddessOfChaos 3 years ago

Getting Thursday murder club vibes from that last part

3points

Tiffanie Sewell 3 years ago

This sounds perfect!

2points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

Old english ladies solving crimes... That's a series I need to watch.

2points

Thomas Turnbull 3 years ago

No bake off for me rest is ok

0points

WeDontTalkAboutBruno 3 years ago

y e s

0points

#52

#mondayvibes 😒

Final score:

71points

POST

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

I'm going to use this!

14points

Sasy 3 years ago

that is priceless

1point

RandomX123 3 years ago

I have a similar line of my own: "I'm allergic to human(s/ interaction)"

0points

#53

It’s 2022. We *have* The Technology
@vampiresnvino

Final score:

70points

POST

Piet Puk 3 years ago

Have you tried?

14points

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

yep, does not work

4points

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

Yeah just pooped myself

3points

Arieke 3 years ago

Like, really really tried.

1point

R Carson 3 years ago

YEP

0points

Joe Das 3 years ago

I use my resting b***h face - often very effective

0points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Somebody's been practicing their witchcraft wrong!

0points

#54

Because We Were Once Young & Full Of Hope
@pallavigunalan

Final score:

67points

POST

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago (edited)

When you were in school you didn't lose sleep over worrying about bills, employment, relationships and the world burning. That's why so many adults are exhausted from just walking to their car for the daily commute.

21points

Lukas-not-Luca (he/him) 3 years ago

I mean, I lose sleep worrying about having to worry about those things (and yeah we do worry about the world burning)

4points

Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 3 years ago

Instead i worry about people jokingly hitting on me because I'm ugly and it's funny (🤮), my undiagnosed mental issues, getting food because it's scary, social interactions, ect

2points

Talon 3 years ago

Well in school we lose sleep over assignments, tests and exams, having to get a job, our future, and you know, the world burning down around us

0points

deadinside 3 years ago

actually I do lose sleep over bills, employment, relationships, and the state of the world (I'm in highschool)

0points

Crissy Brandt 3 years ago (edited)

So true! I had one day where I had three back to back mtgs that were an hour each. I friggin lost it! This was after 2+ mtgs per day the previous 3 days. I was not close to ok that week.

1point

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

Because when you were in school you had no freedom and were in a constant fear of upseting for the smallest reason one of those terryfying dictators who could decide to destroy your entire life without an effort and whom you called "parents" and "teachers".

0points

#55

I See No Crime
@thatconnieshin

Final score:

67points

POST

ChimeraBubbles 3 years ago

Those male authors have obviously never met a woman let alone seen one at rock bottom. This ain't it.

40points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

So... Boobs don't move to express your feelings like a dog's ears? /s

9points

Joe Reaves 3 years ago

She's at rock bottom but she's taken time to style her hair, do her make up, and shave her legs.

9points

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago (edited)

and dress sexy :/

9points

SeidWolf 3 years ago

witnessed one friend drink her boxed wine until she wound up curling into fetal position crying under the kitchen table... awkward; but still not rock bottom.

8points

Karis Ravenhill 3 years ago

She's not drinking gin and crying on a set of stairs. What rock bottom have these guys seen? Also hanging out in my underwear, drinking and smoking, blasting my music and hanging with my cats, not a man in sight? - that's called PARADISE.

5points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago (edited)

I loved this show!♟️

4points

InfectedVoice 3 years ago

If she is happy and chilled, that's what matters, get to f**k Connie.

1point

Lynn Morello 3 years ago

Thats not rock bottom, that is super P####ed.

0points

Dee Lee 3 years ago

Legs unshaven, "party-size" bag of Doritos & a gallon of ice cream at hand, Outlander queued to Jamie taking off his shirt....

0points

Thomas Sweda 3 years ago

Connie, it doesn’t look a bit like you.

0points

Spider Man 3 years ago

Is that Bella thorne

0points

Yara Balabanova 3 years ago

No, it's Anna Taylor-Joy in the Queen's Gambit, a great series

2points

#56

Thanks I Hate It
@funnyordie

Final score:

66points

POST

SeidWolf 3 years ago

- someone walks in saying "we need to talk" and then leaves

28points

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

That statement takes a night sleep of me

2points

SeidWolf 3 years ago

- person walks briskly and heavily across a room/hall and while looking at you says "Fine... Whatever.."

6points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

"Hmm... Can I tell you something? -Sure. -Erm... No. Actually... Forget it. -Why? What? -Nothing, I said. -What did you want to say?! -Nothing. -F**K YOU!!"

4points

boredkoala 3 years ago

Hi, Anxious Person here! You had me at "Someone jumps out "

2points

deadinside 3 years ago (edited)

"i have to tell u sth but i can't tell u until tmr"

2points

InfectedVoice 3 years ago

Text from boss "see me first thing".

1point

Lynn Morello 3 years ago

I would be happy to stay.

0points

Bacony Cakes 3 years ago

Speakers play voice recordings that kinda sound like your name.

0points

Joe Das 3 years ago

- Outlook reminder for conference call

0points

phil blanque 3 years ago

Did you leave the cats closed in a room with no catbox?

0points

#57

It’s My Journey And It Is *exhausting*
@nargisikoftay

Final score:

63points

POST

Elliot Fowler 3 years ago (edited)

In my mind if a person compliments me then that means they aprove of what I did, so now I have the crushing weight of expectaion and trust on me. (Compliment = expectation = stress) (No compliment = indeffernece = no stress)

15points

Scarlett 3 years ago

If someone compliments me I will either a: think they’re making fun of me, b: not believe a word of it, and c: all of the above. It’s mostly C though.

3points

ElenaK 3 years ago

Me Me Me Me

2points

Lynn Morello 3 years ago

Yes, yes, no, no, no, yes.

1point

Joe Das 3 years ago

My answers are: no, no, yes, no, no, no

1point

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

I'm being watched.

1point

phil blanque 3 years ago

This is a great post....wait, no it isn't.....wait, yes it is, brilliant......wait, no it isn't......whew!

1point

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

Compliments are highly suspicious. They always mean that someone wants something from you.

1point

Elmie Pumpkinbush 3 years ago

Wow that's messed up

0points

#58

This Is My Only Goal For Today
@someecards

Final score:

61points

POST

The Penguin Bandit 3 years ago

The container does, yes. The food, not so much. Don't ask me how I know this.

40points

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

experiences are the key to success (bath) :D

3points

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

Chocolate finger biscuits containers float too. I've done extensive research on the subject and they get nice and melted in the warm water.

2points

Alexej Dvorak 3 years ago

I have been propagating the concept of tub cake in my social bubble for about two years now with a very similar image.

1point

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Life skills!

1point

Helena Hattingh 3 years ago

I wish they taught me that for LO!! Life would’ve been way easier!

0points

Joe Das 3 years ago

Eww

-1point

#59

Wise Beyond Your Years
@karaklenk

Final score:

59points

POST

Tonya Wallace 3 years ago (edited)

She's been here before.

20points

Chaotic-Pansexual (she/they) 3 years ago

Yes. We all come here to avoid our responsibilities while reading about people avoiding their responsibilities and joking about how life sucks. And occasionally there are cute animals

-2points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

Wow! She's so young to have figured that out already.

5points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Teaching them from young, huh?

3points

TXT_is love 3 years ago

She got it all right.

2points

#60

The Words "Staying At Home And Not Talking To Anyone" Actually Turn Me On

Final score:

59points

POST

September 3 years ago

Days? Weeks.

18points

A Strike 3 years ago

Years at this point :D

0points

SeidWolf 3 years ago

Therapist - "how are you managing with COVID and isolation" Me - "are you kidding; it's heaven and wish it never ends, except for the innocent deaths 'cause that really sucks. Maybe if it were only the stupid ones."

5points

Miss Cris 3 years ago

Me: "I'm always hearing on tv that everybody's looking forward the pandemy ends but I'm afraid of the end of isolation, i wish it asts forever". Therapist: "Everybody is secretly telling me the same as you".

2points

Zoe Vokes 3 years ago

I have that slanket colour. Very comfortable.

1point

Thomas Turnbull 3 years ago

Works for me

0points

Sasy 3 years ago

did anyone else look at this and think oooo Skeletor invented the Snuggie

0points

Invisible Potato 3 years ago

years...

0points

The Penguin Bandit 3 years ago

I don't complain. All of my stuff is here and there's like no people but lots of dogs.

0points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Again, why are these posts so specific?

0points

#61

Tc Bonehugsnirony

Final score:

58points

POST

T. D. Bostick 3 years ago

Sounds like you feel better during meals.

20points

A.J Milne 3 years ago

Fun fact: Food releases dopamine. The reason why I dance whilst eating.

5points

Rick Seiden 3 years ago

On one monitor I have "ACCEPT WHAT YOU CAN'T CHANGE, CHANGE WHAT YOU CAN" to remind me not to dwell on crap from work. On the other I have a crude expression I use when something really pisses me off--just to balance things out.

3points

TXT_is love 3 years ago

The accuracy.

2points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

So you are a complete idiot every morning at 7?

2points

SeidWolf 3 years ago

not crying but the 12am hope is 24/7 (or a meteor, also good)

2points

Joe Das 3 years ago

All of the above except that I like my job

1point

GPZ 3 years ago

It's ok, the lizard people are apparently taking over the world (IDK if it's by using the alien DNA in the COVID vaccines or not though)

0points

#62

Icon
@amysilverberg

Final score:

56points

POST

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

why is he butting in? ...

20points

Bacony Cakes 3 years ago

He has terminal wanker syndrome.

5points

Cori Crabb 3 years ago

I hate people who just think they can but into your conversation without knowing any of the details and just assuming what you're talking about.

0points

GPZ 3 years ago

I wish more people would cry about this

0points

InfectedVoice 3 years ago

I feel this about music, I'm still checking bands from the late 80's discographies, I will absolutely die before I listen to all the music I want.

0points

#63

Being Out Past 7 Pm Is Just Not My Speed
@eliwmccann

Final score:

56points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Marry him! Oh wait, you did!

33points

Lord pretzell 3 years ago

A keeper

6points

R Carson 3 years ago

AHHH truth is so refreshing.

5points

Kanuli 3 years ago

True love.

3points

MomJeans 3 years ago

He's a keeper

3points

Joe Das 3 years ago

Thankfully this is the kind of man usually date

1point

#64

… We Don’t?
@alydixonisok

Final score:

55points

POST

ZAPanda 3 years ago

doctor is totally lying. I literally do not know anyone who is not anxious and depressed.

39points

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

Might depend on where you're living. I've been a recluse now for over a year thanks to the pandemic and don't feel any anxiety or depression. In fact, I quite like it.

6points

Donkey boi 3 years ago

I'm not. Never have been. I'm not sure if I'm actually capable, my therapist said that he thinks I might get depressed given the right (or wrong) circumstances. The closest I've got was really sad.

2points

Lynn Morello 3 years ago

I do, and it isn't me.

0points

Bobby 3 years ago

Having feelings of depression and anxiety happens in everyone from time to time, but isn't always indicative of mental health concerns. I think it's too general a question from the doc for a proper diagnosis

0points

Raven DeathShade 3 years ago

My sister says that her brain repels it. She's also the one who was cracking jokes seconds after I had to handle 2 of my pets killing our new kitten BY MYSELF because I was babysitting my siblings at the time, so...

0points

Kian Sanders 3 years ago

Same

0points

September 3 years ago

I've never been anxious or depressed.

0points

A.J Milne 3 years ago

I wonder how it feels like NOT to have anxiety🤯

3points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

Your doctor is a bragging liar.

2points

Kimi Tomminello 3 years ago

I love that my doctors know me well enough to ask if I have any unusual feelings of anxiety or depression instead of just any feelings of. Makes all the difference in the world

2points

julie son 3 years ago

My therapist would not stop snapping one of the 8 to 10 rubber bands she had on her wrist throughout our sessions, but I still valued her input, since years of dealing with depression made me amazing at solving everybody else's s**t, while still being totally floored by mine. To the one above I would be like "so you think you can help me based on stuff you read in a book? I don't think so."

1point

Talon 3 years ago

Wait there’s people who can actually function in their day-to-day lives without feeling like the weight of the world and the pressure of society is going to and is crushing them?!?!

0points

TXT_is love 3 years ago

She is trying to hide something.

0points

Rick Seiden 3 years ago

They give me that questionnaire every year at my physical. I just write across it in big letters "I HAVE DEPRESSION AND ANXIETY-BEING TREATED BY PSYCHIATRIST," which they really already know. Then I move on to the next set of questions.

0points

#65

Plz Don’t Make Me Do This
twitter/Elle91

Final score:

54points

POST

September 3 years ago

What? You writing a book? Why the interrogation? Who sent you? 🤔

20points

Khavrinen 3 years ago

"Do you have a warrant? I have the right to remain silent, you know."

3points

sofacushionfort 3 years ago

I mastered the art of making small talk. Really small. Like those artists who make drawings with a half-dozen atoms.

2points

StayClassy 3 years ago

I never know how to answer that question: "How are you?" You want the truth or am I supposed to be polite? You can't have both.

2points

Lynn Morello 3 years ago

Next.

0points

Joe Das 3 years ago

Why is it any of your f'ing business

0points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

"Do"? "Fun"? ... What is wrong witg you?!

0points

#66

These Worries Are Mine
@friend_shape

Final score:

54points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

So specific!

6points

Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 3 years ago

Same

2points

#67

But Why Are Rates Of Anxiety And Burnout At An All Time High? 🥴
twitter Cred @mo_ranyart

Final score:

54points

POST

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

After I chose to stay uninformed about current events, my will to live has increased significantly.

19points

Patrick Earley 3 years ago

Media free since 2003 and life is good. If it's that important we'll hear about it somehow, right?

0points

Nora12 3 years ago

This is my constant struggle!

2points

Talon 3 years ago

I feel that but since I’m not informed about current events and I’m in school I’m forced to learn about them anyway and this whole year for social and English has been full of depression and murder and death

0points

Lynn Morello 3 years ago (edited)

Why do you think I am so depressed? As a species, we don't deserve this planet.

0points

#68

The Only Scenario In Which I Will Agree To Attend Your Party

Final score:

54points

POST

Justin Schalow 3 years ago

Are these Enya’s cats?

42points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

Does this look like a luxury irish castle?

4points

FloC 3 years ago

Probably, because it would cost a lot of money to have people risking their skin and life to dress at least 8 cats with costumes.

3points

Sawyer Kidder 3 years ago

Yep!

1point

Crissy Brandt 3 years ago

I like you Justin, you are witty.

0points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

The question is: cat-igators or alli-cats?

3points

Kate 3 years ago

Ca(t)ymen.

1point

Mrs S Premium 3 years ago

Poor cats.

0points

June 3 years ago

Aaaaand this is my new standard now.

0points

R Carson 3 years ago

I'm in

0points

Joe Das 3 years ago

You'll get this at my place

0points

troufaki13 3 years ago

Please!! I want to go to that party!!

0points

#69

Your Shit Is Bananas? Ohh That’s Cute. Mine Is Nowhere To Be Seen 💅
@kt_nre

Final score:

53points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

You will never know my secrets!! 🦉

15points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

Coffee?

1point

jammer 3 years ago

”WHEREISMYTENTHCUPOFCOFFEEICANTFINDITWHATHAVEYOUDONEWITHITCURSEYOU!”

4points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

Me, when a patient is crashing and I'm the one who steps in and takes charge. "You're always so calm in an emergency.". No I'm not. My brain is actually screaming "Holy ****!! Everyone's looking at me to know what to do and I'm scared out of my fn mind right now!!" When it's all over my boss asks my if I'm ok. Me:Oh ya. No problem. Then I go back to work like nothing happened. For all the Healthcare workers and other essential employees that keep a hospital functioning during 2 years and counting of covid, multiply this by a gazillion. PLEASE GET VACCINATED!! This is why everyone is burned out exhausted, will have PTSD, and are leaving because if they don't they're going to lose their sanity.

3points

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

Inside I'm having a total meltdown outside I'm telling everyone, 'I'm grand it's all grand' 🥴

2points

Emily Barnes 3 years ago

Lol same

0points

Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago

I lost my s**t years ago and I still haven't found it.

2points

Talon 3 years ago

Lol they have no idea what my brain is like rn

0points

R Carson 3 years ago

AHHHH ACTING.....

0points

Luther von Wolfen 3 years ago

in my mind, I became Olgra from the Dark Crystal a long time ago.

0points

#70

*trembles*
@ashhhhhhole

Final score:

53points

POST

September 3 years ago

We'll call you, Chihuahua.

37points

Joe Reaves 3 years ago

Nah, you need at least one system devoted to psychopathic aggression as well for that. I'm terrified of every single thing, but that isn't going to stop me shouting at it, is the chihuahua philosophy. Although a nice pile of clothes you can hide in for a nap will distract them from the shouting.

6points

Emily Barnes 3 years ago

They are

1point

#71

*prays For The Monster To Get Me*
@allthatweforget

Final score:

51points

POST

Jo Johannsen 3 years ago

I still do that at 70.

15points

Connie Wade 3 years ago

Me too; I'm 71

2points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

Therapist: When exactly did you start believing there is a monster living under the bed? What do you think that means?

1point

Jo Johannsen 3 years ago

The first time I felt it tugging at the blanket... and he must be cold as well as hungry.

0points

Shelley DuVal 3 years ago

Does anyone wonder why a lot of the human race is convinced that it's dangerous to put your foot out the side of the bed? What happened in the dim, dark, distant past that we don't know what happened?

0points

Talia Mclaren 3 years ago

lol

0points

#72

Well One Thing I’m Absolutely Certain Of Is That I Am *not* In My Neighbor’s Yard, Tfg
@adler_kuper

Final score:

51points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

It took me far too long to realize this wasn't some twisted form of poetry.

27points

/bored_as_heck/ 3 years ago

Here's mine - my trash can went on a wild ride and wiped out the entirety of humanity.

6points

Joe Das 3 years ago

Is this also an "I'm drunk" meter?

4points

C. Wade 3 years ago

😂 just down the street at the moment, high chances of never seeing it again

3points

Crissy Brandt 3 years ago

I have been laughing about this for a good long while. I’m saving this one.

1point

The Penguin Bandit 3 years ago

Yes. To all.

1point

Talon 3 years ago

I’m thinking between down the street and I’ve lost my trash can

0points

Lynn Morello 3 years ago

Don the Street

0points

Chaotic-Pansexual (she/they) 3 years ago

I think I’m at down the street rn

0points

Patrick Earley 3 years ago

Why is this not at the top of this list!?

0points

#73

#blessed
@annetdonahue

Final score:

50points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

It was the avocado toast wasn't it?

42points

Miss Marmite 3 years ago

no it was the lattes ☕️

9points

GPZ 3 years ago

No, it was the liver mousse

0points

Lynn Morello 3 years ago

Nope.... Corona Virus.

0points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago (edited)

No, it was all the pollution emitted, and stress induced, by those despicable boomers.

-1point

Lord pretzell 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

September 3 years ago

Gen X for the win! 😃

3points

introverted_dragon 3 years ago

I love how every stock image of a millennial is just someone with a lot of plants.

1point

Joe Das 3 years ago

She seems to be very happy about that fact - just like me

1point

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

Hurray!

1point

Karis Ravenhill 3 years ago

Stop telling us living til the diaper years is awesome. It blows unless you're lucky to be fit and healthy at that age, and have plenty of friends/family. Otherwise it blows. It's lonely and depressing and sucks your soul out your ass.

0points

#74

Your Chewing Sounds Are Causing Me Physical Pain

Final score:

50points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Option D: All of the above.

6points

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

option D bis, just the look

1point

Dee Lee 3 years ago

Hit!

0points

Emily Barnes 3 years ago

Makes me want to slap the person

0points

#75

Modern Technology Designed To Help Us Avoid Small Talk Is My Everything
@caitiedelaney

Final score:

49points

POST

Kyle Boehm 3 years ago

More likely, "take a picture of it' and send it to you, saying it is delivered. then stealing it lmao

15points

Lynn Morello 3 years ago

Ordered Pizza last night and the delivery Drive overshot my driveway and parked in Next doors driveway..

0points

Iseefractals 3 years ago

So you're reinforcing the belief that having a smartphone and downloading an app is now a career path, while also adding to unchecked destruction of the planet by having ill thought out purchases delivered individually, while Americans, who are already so incredibly, disgustingly fat, now have even LESS motivation to shuffle their cascading pile of shame any further than the front door. Yeah. It's really awesome whenever we're given explicit examples of people not seeing anything beyond their own convenience.

-2points

#76

#twinning
@donomo

Final score:

48points

POST

Will Young 3 years ago

Reminds me of the time between Christmas and New Years, where everyday is Sunday

6points

InfectedVoice 3 years ago

Then all the other little children clapped.

0points

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Jasper Cool 3 years ago

The kid is probably six. This is definitely something my kid could have said at 6. He's a second grader now and he still has no clue about days of the week or weekends.

6points

#77

Essential Language 🙌🙌
tc @_saracannon

Final score:

46points

POST

Sail Westerly 3 years ago

Too easy for the other person to say; "No, no, I've got all the time in the World for you." What the hell do you do then?

4points

The Penguin Bandit 3 years ago

Hang up

10points

julie son 3 years ago

Reply with "I insist. You've already taken enough of my time?"

5points

Wistiti 3 years ago

"You don't have enough time to tell me I'm special."

0points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

It works... I love it, it is like a magical spell but in real life.

3points

L.A. Trefry 3 years ago

Not a southern phrase though -- My mom was saying on the phone "Well, I'd better let you go", or "Well, I don't want to keep you" 50 years ago, at least, in New England. A far more creative option (which she never used, but that I read years ago) is "Oh, must dash, the cat's on fire!"

1point

That nerd Zoe 3 years ago

Yeah. And "welp!" *Knee slap*

1point

GPZ 3 years ago

I don't know half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.

0points

#78

This Tracks.
@blaire.erskine

Final score:

46points

POST

SeidWolf 3 years ago

it can be both.. all of it... ALLL

6points

R Carson 3 years ago

BURN!!!

1point

#79

I Am Very Excited For This New Life Chapter And Where It Will Take Me 🙌
@kristen__arnett

Final score:

44points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Congratulations!

10points

KimTx 3 years ago

I can found under my desk in the fecal position. Laying in a ball pooping myself...

0points

Emily Barnes 3 years ago

Same

0points

#80

Passionate About Personal Development

Final score:

44points

POST

phil blanque 3 years ago

Yeah, but the milk isn't vegan....and you gotta dip...gotta dip.

13points

Jasper Cool 3 years ago

I personally use cashew milk on the rare ocassion I have Oreos lol. I'm not vegan I just can't do cow milk.

3points

L.A. Trefry 3 years ago

Nah, no dipping necessary. I'm a purist.

2points

Bacony Cakes 3 years ago

Eugh. Who dips Oreos? Shortbreads are for dipping.

1point

Scarlett 3 years ago

And then hate myself for the next week as my skin announces its displeasure with the sugar overload

5points

Kirsten Kerkhof 3 years ago

No wonder they don't taste nice.

1point

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

I hate them. They taste weird like lard

3points

Lynn Morello 3 years ago

I hate Orio's

0points

Mrs S Premium 3 years ago

Good news!

0points

Lillian Swaim 3 years ago

Also vegan, Indian fried bread with maple syrup and powdered sugar. French fries (depending on source) and ketchup. Onion rings and bbq sauce.

0points

Chinmayee Kalghatgi 3 years ago

They fry chapati with maple syrup? That might taste better than the jaggery stuffed in the roti

0points

September 3 years ago

And type 2 diabetes

0points

#81

@mommajessiec

Final score:

44points

POST

Brandy Grote 3 years ago

Shower seat is underrated! Gonna just rest while I wash. And still be exhausted when I'm done...

12points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

You can wash your feet without risking a head injury.

4points

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

Sitting in a chair when you shower makes it difficult to wash your butt.

1point

KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago

That's why you have a hose. 🙂

0points

Joe Das 3 years ago

Get a bunch of cats

0points

#82

… Who Am I?

Final score:

43points

POST

ZAPanda 3 years ago

hahahaahhahahaahhahahaahhahahaahhahahaahhahahaah wtf is that even?

12points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

A muddy pomeranian.

7points

LuckyL 3 years ago

I thought it was a block dog with a white piece of fur (not his fur) on the back at first

2points

Scarlett Storm 3 years ago

Its a dog. A white one too.

0points

Joe Reaves 3 years ago

A dog that is going to have to walk home lol.

0points

Laugh or not 3 years ago

My reaction, exactly.

0points

Cyd Charisse 3 years ago

I thought it was a Chupacabra wearing a little dog-fur cape!

3points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

You are going to have SUCH A BATH when we get home!

3points

jammer 3 years ago

I thought the spawn hell dog had a cute jacket on.

3points

Bill Hark 3 years ago

I had to look at this a long time before I realized it wasn't a statue covered in fur

1point

Nancy Doughty 3 years ago

A terrier is a terrier is a terrier.

1point

smugdruggler 3 years ago

True that. Terrierists the lot of them.

0points

R Carson 3 years ago

Swamp creature.

0points

Francine Govan 3 years ago

Poor puppy has Trump hair!

0points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

Maybe I will go to hell for that, but I can't stop laughing at that.

0points

#83

When I Say I’m Into Sports, This Is What I’m Talking About
@jtcods19

Final score:

41points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Y'all lying to me if you didn't actually go watch this.

12points

deadinside 3 years ago

i don't have hulu

4points

InfectedVoice 3 years ago

I had no frikkin idea about this, well I know what we're doing on Friday night.

0points

R Carson 3 years ago

I want to see that.

0points

Kim Blizzard 3 years ago

Thank you, just added this to my Hulu list!

0points

#84

Cool If We Skip The Text Part Too?
@emilymurnane

Final score:

40points

POST

Khavrinen 3 years ago

Status: Unchanged.

9points

#85

Life Story

Final score:

39points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

*Boop*

12points

Emily Barnes 3 years ago

*boop*

3points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

Plot twist : you are not awkward, your insecurities make you think you are awkward.

2points

June 3 years ago

Oh yes, I am 😅

2points

Queerios 3 years ago

that thing is my spirit animal

1point

Joe Das 3 years ago

Why tf does everyone need to fit in?

1point

Talia Mclaren 3 years ago

omg this made me laugh lol

0points

Patrick Earley 3 years ago

I've never seen a meme I related more to.

0points

#86

Teehee Newayz, U Mad At Me?
@mremilyheller Via @akprzy ❤️

Final score:

38points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Can I just make this my status?

10points

R Carson 3 years ago

Good luck!

1point

#87

Ffs Marie!
@elleohhell

Final score:

38points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

*Holds the hands of the people I know*: No, it doesn't.

13points

Little Miss Betty 3 years ago

*Holds my own hands*: No, not this either.

13points

j_m m_j 3 years ago

question....why do you hate people answer...... have you ever met people has to be the dumbest question ever

0points

SeidWolf 3 years ago

if by "spark Joy" you mean setting someone named joy on fire... maybe??

0points

#88

I Wonder What Tomorrow Will Bring 🤷🏻‍♀️
@hcdawes

Final score:

38points

POST

ChimeraBubbles 3 years ago

Screenshot'd for future reference.

10points

Kanuli 3 years ago

Google on how to automate reply-> all Done.

1point

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

My boss told me to say "You're asking too much of me." and leave it at that.

0points

#89

Both *twerks*
@mamajulesm

Final score:

38points

POST

September 3 years ago

Call it what you want, it's drama free and I'm loving every minute of it! 😃

12points

Emily Barnes 3 years ago

SAME

0points

Dio 3 years ago

Disassociation is actually pretty scary and not something that can be easily snapped out of... It's like calling people who are a bit perfectionist at organisation as people with OCD. Mental illness isn't a laughing matter, it's pretty serious. I get that this is meant to be light-hearted, but ... you know. Time and place and all that.

2points

Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 3 years ago

And what's the difference?

1point

StayClassy 3 years ago

Ugh... this makes relazing even feel like work

1point

Lynn Morello 3 years ago

What';s TickTock, ? Not the clock type tick tock.

0points

Crissy Brandt 3 years ago

Omg! That’s so true!

0points

R Carson 3 years ago

NUNYA

0points

Joe Das 3 years ago

Targeted and proud

0points

#90

Sis. Keep Your Voice. Humans Are *the Worst*
@itsnashflynn

Final score:

38points

POST

Emily Barnes 3 years ago

I want to be where the people aren't

7points

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

I know very few people who want to be where people are.

4points

Kanuli 3 years ago

I actually find this relatable and this is why: Humans often want what they don’t have. And often what they never had. Just be like Ariel, and skip the people part. Start with Mussel Bras.

0points

September 3 years ago

My life goal is to move as far into the middle of nowhere Alaska as I can reasonably get. I'll only see people when it's absolutely necessary, like medical providers.

0points

R Carson 3 years ago

YEP

0points

#91

Not All Of Us Are On Cocaine, Janet
@anishramakrishna

Final score:

38points

POST

julie son 3 years ago

Which month?

11points

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

Only monsters schedule appointments in the dead of night.

4points

Chaotic-Pansexual (she/they) 3 years ago

Wdym? 9:00 pm sounds like a great bedtime- oh that’s not what they meant..

1point

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

I will already be sleeping.

1point

Dee Lee 3 years ago

Is that Glenn Close????

0points

#92

I Just Want Someone To Make My Phone Calls For Me
@authorabbyjiminez

Final score:

37points

POST

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Chinmayee Kalghatgi 3 years ago (edited)

Me too, im an ambivert going through introvert and extrovert phases every few days (my experience) and the extrovert phases are actually the hardest because everybody is only availible during introvert phase

0points

Bobby 3 years ago

This is me and my wife to a T

1point

#93

The Early Bird Can Have The Worm, I’m In It For The 3 Hours Of Extra Sleep 🙌🙌
baddestmamajama

Final score:

37points

POST

ChimeraBubbles 3 years ago

I just finished reading The Art of Rest. Honestly one of the hardest hitting sentences in it was along the lines of "it's not morally superior to get up early" and I felt so much tension leave my body. Also the other sentence: "rest is essential".

21points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

Wow! I'm not a degenerate for sleeping late. My self esteem score just went up from -100 to -99. My therapist will be so happy.

4points

LadyEncredible Rand 3 years ago

I never understood people that judge people for getting up late. Personally, yes I get up dumb early, it's mainly because I cannot sleep past a certain point unless I'm drunk, however I don't judge people that can sleep late. Hell I envy it, I wish I could.

3points

Laugh or not 3 years ago

May I recommend you "L'art de la sieste" (the art of naps) by Thierry Paquot (if it translated to your language or you read French)? It is really short and will make you want to nap for the rest of your life.

2points

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

I'm Dutch and we have niksen. It's doing absolutely nothing, not even thinking. Great way to relax during the day. You can even do it sitting at your desk. Our civil servants are real masters in niksen.

6points

The Penguin Bandit 3 years ago

Soup in bed can be dangerous

0points

#94

Roger That, Over.
@emilymurnane

Final score:

37points

POST

ElenaK 3 years ago

Exactly!

10points

Kanuli 3 years ago

If just your friends would understand. No, they keep forgetting all the good times, feelings diminish, and someday you aren’t friends anymore. Are you at fault? Aren’t they?

1point

GPZ 3 years ago

Totally!!

0points

Terry Tobias 3 years ago

Welcome to my bipolar life.

0points

Joe Das 3 years ago

Ditto, except social life

0points

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

Have it both ways and become an influenza on Instagram.

0points

#95

Don't Need This Kind Of Negativity In My Life *buys 72 Notebooks*
@jaronmyers

Final score:

35points

POST

ChimeraBubbles 3 years ago

But I do use them. I am that kind of person. Errrr, well, clearly this message isn't for me. Moving on...

10points

James Nall 3 years ago

You lie through your teeth.

0points

Psycho Cat 3 years ago

BUT! They spark joy!

3points

The Penguin Bandit 3 years ago

Yes I AM.... I just haven't bought the right set yet

3points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

And that was about as much as I'm going to be motivated for the rest of the year.

1point

Jo Johannsen 3 years ago

He's not wrong. But all those lovely pen and pencil colors. All those adorable little notepads. Stickers - meh.

1point

Joe Das 3 years ago

I can't imagine being with people who use them

0points

Emily Barnes 3 years ago

I'll use the pens and stickers but nothing else lol

0points

#96

I Call Bullshit
@danjperlman

Final score:

34points

POST

Buren 3 years ago

To stop you from asking more questions.

21points

Kanuli 3 years ago

Which is far better than being honest! Last time I was brutally honest I was send to get a psychiatrist or would get fired.

1point

jammer 3 years ago

Works on so many levels! ”I’m doing perfect!”, but also ”Perfect. Now this idiot. What else, today?!? What else?”

2points

Iseefractals 3 years ago

I always say "Could be better could be dead. I don't think anyone understands that its not an either or statement.

1point

Lynn Morello 3 years ago

Are you sure it wasn't "Purrfect",? That would mean they were talking to their cats only.

0points

Tiffanie Sewell 3 years ago

I say fabulous. I can change the tone depending on whether I mean it or not.

0points

September 3 years ago

I Usually answer with, Awesome as always 😎

0points

#97

Why Do We Live In A Society Where Procrastination Isn't A Paid Job?!
@futuremindreader

Final score:

32points

POST

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

Me every day! Literally, I vacuum everyday!

7points

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

Can you come to my garden? It needs some vacuuming.

5points

Miss Frankfurter 3 years ago

What if the thing I need to do is vacuum?

1point

Andrei Marentette 3 years ago

imagine brining your vaccum to the desert tho

1point

The Penguin Bandit 3 years ago

If you wait til the last minute, it only takes a minute.

1point

Tiffanie Sewell 3 years ago

I have that same vacuum lol

0points

#98

Plz Normalize This Form Of Communication For In Person Interactions Moving Forward Plz And Tysm @badrundoesntrun

Final score:

31points

POST

WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago

That's how life works too. If someone is talking bullshyte, you can compliment them on the absence of brain activity and move on.

2points

#99

Wish Me Luck!
twitter/ Juan_amayah
via @ruinmyweek

Final score:

31points

POST

T. D. Bostick 3 years ago

Well, congratulations are in order, I guess.

12points

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

This is me every January! I weirdly believe that it's the worst month of the year!

0points

#100

If That Number Is Significantly Higher, Does That Mean I’m Doing A Good Job? Did I Win Something?
@kevinfarzad

Final score:

30points

POST

Mohsie Supposie 3 years ago (edited)

I am up to like 7.9 billion people by age 40. Does that count?

25points

Mimi La Souris 3 years ago

I don’t have this problem, I’m nearsighted, I don’t put my glasses on when I go out, I’m in my fuzzy cocoon

4points

Catherine Graffham 3 years ago

Same, but then you get surprised when they spot you and seek you out to talk to you *shudders*

0points

Jo Johannsen 3 years ago

Only three?

3points

Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago

There are people I would rather not see but there isn't anyone I am terrified of seeing.

2points

Elmie Pumpkinbush 3 years ago

I think it is about thr US, where many people have guns.

1point

Madison Feehan 3 years ago

I was supposed to wait until 30?

2points

R Carson 3 years ago

Conservative estimate.

1point

Tim Douglass 3 years ago

Kind of turns out that I'm the one no one wants to run into at the grocery store.

0points

Thomas Turnbull 3 years ago

And the list only grows longer

0points

Kanuli 3 years ago

2 I got already. It’s a quite elderly couple, maybe late 40s? Or 50s? They wear really weird clothes, almost like pjs. But that’s not even the problem. They smell! Like 5-10 meter of reeking cloud of hell. The first times, I thought what died in here. And made the mistake to pass them, when one was talking. And if you thought it couldn’t get worse with the body odour, the smell of his breath could be a chemical weapon. I was never disgusted by anything more in life...and I watched horror movies like Martyrs and the Saw movies. Whenever I see them now I take a large wide bow around them, or skip grocery shopping altogether.

0points

September 3 years ago

Usually none since they installed self checkout

0points

#101

What Do They Do With All Their Free Time?????
@stephs0up Via @realpettymay0

Final score:

30points

POST

September 3 years ago

I always thought the inner monologue thing was a movie trope. I think in images and sounds and smells and really short movements from place to place, unless I'm writing or reading something then I think of the words.

9points

over it already 3 years ago

That's amazing to me. I have multiple inner voices. Not like split personalities, but in the sense that I can full-on argue counterpoints in my head against myself. It's always in words, but usually at a speed faster than you could speak or type (replying to your response below.) The differences in human minds/thoughts/experiences is incredible.

8points

Nora12 3 years ago

OK I have a question about this, because I need to understand this. So background, I do consider that I have an inner monologue, no it is nothing like the movie version were it is elegant and constantly happening. It is just I occasionally have thoughts on the world that Stay in my head. I mean you talk about thinking in images and sounds but that doesn’t work for everything what if you heard some stranger make a bone headed comment would you not think “wow that was stupid” or would you actually have an image for that or voice it outloud and hope that the stranger doesn’t beat you up? How about writing your comment above do you just sit down and start typing and hope for the best or did you think through the words you want to type?

5points

Bobby 3 years ago

Your brain baffles me, but that's OK :)

1point

Chinmayee Kalghatgi 3 years ago

I do have that inner monologue but i dont know how to describe it. It’s a voice but it doesnt have a sound or distinct thing. It’s like a voice but not like a voice

2points

CHRIS DOMRES 3 years ago

I compose music. I have melodies and harmonies going round and round inside my brain. Helps reduce the monkey talk. Go out and buy a guitar or a keyboard.

2points

June 3 years ago

Wait, you hear it in your head? Mine doesn't have a voice. There are words, but no voice.

1point

over it already 3 years ago

I think I hear it... it's not like an auditory hallucination, but there is definitely usually tone & texture, more like speech than written language.

1point

Kim Blizzard 3 years ago

I honest to god cannot comprehend how one doesn't have an inner monologue.

1point

Kanuli 3 years ago

„Voice“? How about „voices“?

0points

Raven DeathShade 3 years ago

My sister thought I was crazy when I was talking about my inner monologue. "You think my voice is annoying? I have to hear it 24/7 NONSTOP."

0points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

No.

0points

Parmeisan 3 years ago

Actually, yes. Everyone assumes that their own lived experience is what everyone else experiences, but it turns out that people's brains work in dramatically different ways. In addition having or not having an inner monologue, you can have or not have an inner eye or an inner ear. And the inner eye thing (who knows, maybe all of them) have a scale, so some people cannot, at all, picture things (aka aphantasia) and some can do it a little bit and some people actually do picture sheep jumping a fence when they try to fall asleep. This is a fascinating subject.. it's so far from just "no".

1point

Joe Das 3 years ago

I can't imagine this is true

0points

phil blanque 3 years ago

Nope, there are none....or are there, I keep asking myself.

0points

#102

*twerks*
@wittyidiot

Final score:

29points

POST

MAL 3 years ago

MOOD.

5points

R Carson 3 years ago

True that.

1point

#103

*jazz Hands*
@kristen__arnett

Final score:

29points

POST

R Carson 3 years ago

Hear ya.

1point

#104

The Fact That I Once Was The Kind Of Person Who Willingly Went To Clubs On Nye… 🤯🤯🤯
twitter/ Social_mime

Final score:

28points

POST

Jo Johannsen 3 years ago

I have only ever gone out on New Year's Eve one time. I really regretted not driving myself.

9points

FloC 3 years ago

That reminds me of this awfull NYE party where I spent a lot of time regretting the same... I solved the problem by falling asleep somewhere.

0points

julie son 3 years ago

Every few years I forget and tell my boyfriend "Let's actually get out for New Year and do something fun." Then New Year comes, we look at each other, and one of us asks "Do you really feel like getting out tonight?" and the other breathes a big sigh of relief and says "Oh God, no, can we just stay in?", and we both get giddy with joy and feel like we narrowly escaped being called for tribute in The Hunger Games!

2points

R Carson 3 years ago

YEP

0points

#105

Awkward Af Is My Autopilot Setting
@matthewcappucci

Final score:

26points

POST

ChimeraBubbles 3 years ago (edited)

Yeah, I wouldn't have thought that either. Don't people usually ask for make and model? Edited:spelling

20points

Kanuli 3 years ago

Whats a body type of a vehicle?

3points

Joe Das 3 years ago

At doctor's offices, I have sometimes checked "yes" for "are you pregnant". I'm male.

3points

Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago

Because you don't want her to feel embarrassed again? Sweet of you.

1point

Kitty Kat 3 years ago

This reminds me of the time my cousin, a vet tech, said something about a dog being "buff". The owner said, "Thanks. He is pretty strong." My cousin replied, " I meant his fur color."

0points

The Penguin Bandit 3 years ago

I called the doctor's office for an appointment with a new Dr, secretary asks "what's your address", I say "oh please, no house calls" she's like "wth it's for insurance"

0points

#106

Holy Moly. How Much Time Do We Save By Not Going At All???
@doublebaytoday Via The Great @caroleradziwill

Final score:

20points

POST

iffypedia 3 years ago

cant save the time if you dont go to the party

10points

LuckyL 3 years ago

fixed it: save even more time by not going to the party

1point

Brenda Greene 3 years ago

Irish goodbye, just get up and leave.

2points

Buren 3 years ago

How many days I save for attending 0 party

2points

Joe Das 3 years ago

I'm wondering how they came up with that statistic

1point

Crissy Brandt 3 years ago

It’s called the Irish goodbye.

0points

#107

I Feel Like Being Able To Do This Would Solve *most* Of My Problems
@honeymustardmama

Final score:

-2points

POST

Talia Mclaren 3 years ago

why put this twice

2points

Theoretical Empiricist 3 years ago

To annoy, my friend...to annoy.

2points

Lady Cadaver 3 years ago

Its so nice, they posted it twice :-)

0points

Thomas Turnbull 3 years ago

Because they can.

0points

Jo Johannsen 3 years ago (edited)

Duplicate 😒

1point